God Gotchu Boo

Join Morgan and Sydnei as they dive into the spicy topic of initiating relationships. Get ready for an intriguing conversation that challenges traditional gender roles and explores finding love in the age of empowerment. Grab your headphones and tune in as they drop some truth bombs, leaving you with the ultimate message: God's got you, boo!

Transcript

Morgan Adrine: 0:00

So I said, It's he who finds a wife. So, first how, you feeling, are you spicy meter?

Sydnei Sellers: 0:09

Morg? I think I'm at a jalapeno,

Morgan Adrine: 0:12

jalapeno. Okay. I'm still, when I say before, habanero, still up there a little warm. Yeah, I'm still up there. Because I have a serious question I want to ask. So I had a person I will say, a person of wisdom and older person told me that essentially, in shorter words, if I am, if I if the first quote unquote, attraction, or if the first move is made by me, then that's not my person. And to sum it up, that's pretty much what they say, because and then they gave me the scriptures, He who finds a wife? Sure, we've heard that before. So what I want to ask to you is not necessarily do you agree with that? But is there anything wrong with me, I guess, making the first move or having that first moment of attraction? Like, am I supposed to be playing like, quiet role and let him approach me? Or can I?

Sydnei Sellers: 1:19

You know, this is an interesting topic, because I actually was just talking about this the other day. And to be honest, I think a lot of the ways in which dating and courting were happening, are a bit outdated, to be honest, I mean, what the thought that kept bringing, when you said it was the consistent statement that men are natural hunters, right like that, they have to hunt you, they got to seek you. They like the chase, the thrill of the chase, and all of these things. And to be honest, for me, I think I've only ever, like approached a guy one time. And I don't even think that I I would, I would consider that approach him because I was the one that like, reached out to initiate a date. But it wasn't, I wasn't the first one to reach out to initiate attraction, or that there was something you know, that could potentially come out of this. I honestly don't necessarily think that there's a right or wrong way. I think a lot of times we get caught we get so caught up in like, the formalities of stuff that we miss out on stuff. So I always go back to like, trusting like my gut, and my intuition and my discernment, like, God, should I pull up or wait for him to pull up? You know, but then also you can tell, like, when a guy's interested or not, right? And then like, I'd never act or do anything that I feel like, would make me regret doing something, if that makes sense. So sort of, like feeling, feeling scene, like feeling the space like this person? Or does this safe? Is this space feel safe enough to reach out, or to be the first one to say something, you know,

Morgan Adrine: 3:15

but then I also feel like, and we've talked about this before, that kind of plays into more and more, I'm seeing especially in like our generation that guys almost expect you to be the quote unquote, Hunter, or the one that approaches them. And, you know, that's where, you know, the person that told me is He who finds a wife, that's more so like, the space that she was coming from was like, you know, she was trying to say, like, your generation is backwards, because if you ever feel the need to initiate anything with the man, that's the problem. And like, I listened, I didn't completely agree, but I also wasn't sure how to feel because I also never want to get so caught up in these ideas or, you know, gender roles that again, I'm gonna say you like block your own blessing. But it's hard to and again, I never I never do anything that I don't want to do. I never compromise myself for what I believe in. So understanding that it was like Well, again, like Am I just supposed to be sitting here just waiting for him to just approach me and ask my number or if I am attracted to you? Can I holla like you gonna say? And I don't know. I feel like again with this generation. We as women we're kind of dominating the like we're leading that so it's hard for it's hard to understand anything different because it's like well then if that's the case, I'm be alone to the day I

Sydnei Sellers: 4:44

It is definitely a murky waters. murky waters. I die. think that with me specifically and like dating I try to err on the side of my confidence. I think oftentimes, the feeling or need of like, validation or approval is attached to whether or not you reach out, right? Because we're nobody likes rejection, right? Nobody likes to be like, oh, so I reached out to him and he didn't respond. Right? Right. Same thing with guys. Like, oh, I reached out to her, and she never hit me back, I think, heavy emphasis on like, assessing the situation and doing whatever it is that you're comfortable with. Because society is so flipped, right? Like, I don't necessarily go off of a rule book when it comes to like, approaching a man or in an environment, right? There's different things or cues you can give, like, if you were in the presence of somebody, and you, you know, like them, and then you look, and then they look, and then you could tell if you're both looking, right, then it's like, okay, we'll walk over to you know, say, but when you start to do like, Instagram, or like DM sliddin yeah, they really might be, you know, I landed on DM first, right? So, I mean, I think it's just it's not really one size fits all, you know, like, comfortability is important, I think. And doing whatever it is you feel comfortable with doing when approaching, you know, a man, but I do think some positions and things are supposed to be reserved for men.

Morgan Adrine: 6:33

I just never want to block my own blessings. But I also don't want to compromise my own femininity.

Sydnei Sellers: 6:42

I, I can agree with that. But when you suggest like blocking your blessing, I look at like, blessings and like my person. Like, there's nothing that I could do to keep me away from this person. Like, so like, me not sliding in his dms won't keep me from him. If this is who God said, is for me, right? So I think a lot of times we put so much heavy emphasis on being able to be the selector of our fate and like, our lives that is like we have we give ourselves more control than we really, right. So like the idea that you not sliding in somebody's DMS could be keeping you from your husband. You know, that anything? Like you don't got God? No. No. We do all the time. Like we think even in relationships are even thinking about tolerating too much, right? Like I really in my core of my heart for like the person that God has selected for me. If he got to jump from one building to the next, if God told that man that I was for him, he'll do it outside. Right? Okay, he's outside. So I think like remembering that to like that. It's almost error proof in terms of like purpose and like who he's supposed to be with and my opinion and like things that I've experienced in saying that something as simple as like sliding in the DM or having a boundary that set too high or an idea of how you should be treated is not something that will keep your husband from you.

Morgan Adrine: 8:23

I like to so will be a final note to the home girls.

Sydnei Sellers: 8:28

My final note to the home girls would be God got you boo.

Morgan Adrine: 8:35

Simple and sweet and we dropped the mic