How CEO’s Push Past Fear with Merritt McNeely

Fear is a natural part of any journey, especially for those steering the helm of companies and organizations. But how do successful CEOs navigate this fear? How do they transform it into a driving force for innovation, growth, and accomplishment?

Merritt McNeely, a renowned expert in leadership and business growth, shares her wealth of knowledge on how top executives navigate challenges and push their boundaries. Whether you're an aspiring entrepreneur, a seasoned executive, or simply someone seeking to enhance their personal and professional growth, this conversation is packed with valuable insights that can help you unleash your full potential.

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Transcript

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I'm Jada Willis and this is the Back to Business podcast made for business owners, CEOs and high achievers that are ready to leave their BS excuses behind, get more out of life and see business growth like never before. Let's take the road less traveled and tackle the hard. Are you ready to get back to business? All right, welcome to Back to Business. I am beyond ecstatic to have Merit McNeely on B2B. First, I want to welcome you and then I need to tell everyone really who you are. I know the truth. So Merit, welcome to Back to Business. Thank you, Jada. I'm happy to be here. So for everyone, all intents and purposes, she is the CEO of Flock and Rally, but dude, has been one of my clients, a dear friend, and just an amazing human that I've known for, I don't know, countless years now, countless, and just an awesome leader. Like, you know whenever you meet someone, you're like, your mouth drops because you're constantly impressed by their attitude, by their work ethic, by their ideas, their innovation. Like, this is Merritt. And so I had to have her on our show, and she's doing a really special session at our upcoming retreat, but I just had to have her on this show. So Merritt, I want you to know, like I actually shared this, you are one of my favorite people, okay? Like, I need everyone to know. Stop. It gets a little uncomfortable. It gets a little uncomfortable, but constantly impressed by you. And that's why I really want us to talk about pushing past fear, because it's one of the most important things that one can do in a leadership role. But before we get into all of that, we usually start with, like, what's your journey? What has been your journey to being CEO of Flock and Rally? How'd you get there? Well, I know we don't have all day. I can be a long talker. So I'll try to give you the Cliff Notes version because we could spend all day talking about my journey and even how fear has shown up in my journey over time. I, you know, growing up and getting into college, I was the type of person who just didn't know what I wanted to do. I've actually never known. My sister, who's only 18 months older than me, knew when she was in middle school that she was gonna be a pharmacist and she's a pharmacist, right? And I was not that human. I never knew what I wanted to be, never had an idea. I wasn't the kind of person who had a lot of goals and I was reaching them. I just kind of showed up every day and I don't know, just went with my gut and my intuition and it's kind of guided me my entire life. And so it's really interesting when I look back on how I got to where I am because I didn't necessarily plan this. I know a lot of people who are like type A and super, you know, like have really important jobs and are leaders and are, you know, really respectable and they knew they had a plan from day one and I'm just not that person. So I graduated from college with a degree from the Journalism School of Mass and Mass Communications at USC, and I kind of just fell backwards into it. And I got really lucky. I had a chance to meet the people who ran the Five Points neighborhood in Columbia, and I was right out of college. They offered me a job, which was a normal job. It was a marketing assistant job. It was perfectly suited for my experience level. Three months in, they gave me the opportunity to be the executive director. I bring up this point in my journey for a really, you know, it's a really important reason, and it's because I almost didn't take this opportunity. I was a baby. I was very green. I actually had to Google executive director because I didn't know what it meant. Blimey. Seriously. And I was so scared of failing at this job because I was so underqualified for it. And so I had to face fear a lot in my journey, but this was probably one of the most prominent moments that was a defining moment for me. And I decided to go for it. And so that job, I was the executive director for eight years. And I've spent most of that job pretty scared. But I woke up every day because I cared about what I did and I just kept going. And so that job actually taught me a lot about business and it taught me a lot about life and relationships and how to just show up in this world. And it brought me a little bit of notoriety. I got well known. I was a sort of a public figure and I got a lot of joy out of that and so After that job, I spent five years in state government because I kind of needed a break I got to home in on my skills in marketing and communication specifically during that break because I served as the marketing director for the State Museum and It taught me a lot too because I watched my boss at the time do some pretty scary stuff. And I had a lot of major projects to tackle, and I really, really enjoyed that job, but it just wasn't for me forever. And I landed at Block and Rally about five years ago, where I started as the VP of marketing, which was kind of a made-up job. It was an opportunity. There were only six of us at the company at the time, and Debbie and I were the owners. You know, they knew me. We had been friends. We had been colleagues. I had hired Flock and Rally before, and we all just kind of agreed like, Hey, this might be cool if we did this together. And they saw an opportunity to bring me into the company. And so we just kind of made up my job and I jumped in and started working. And then you came along, Jada, and during the pandemic, during 2020, I was promoted to Executive Vice President where I took over management of the company, primarily of the staff, and became the CEO last September where the owners really took a step back and decided to let me really be in charge of where we're going as a company. And it's been quite an experience. So it's been, I already said countless years and it's actually only been since 2020. Well, it's like it's been 20 years. I mean, right. Well, I mean, we're I think we're old soul friends or something. Right. Exactly. But there are a few things that I heard whenever you were talking. First off, you show up like you. Yes, you accept these really large opportunities, but I think it's also because you're trusting your instincts, but you work hard. If there's one thing I know about you is that you give up 100% to everything that you touch. And I've witnessed this. So whether it's personally or professionally, that's just who you are. And so it's not, I think it's not just showing up, it's working hard and getting lucky. So that's the luck after the hard work, but it also it's your it takes courage to trust your gut. And then just to go after it and say yes to it because you're like here we go and you have to have a certain level of trust in yourself and your own capabilities, right? Yes, and let's be honest that can change over time. What do you mean by that? So you know I look back at my, you know, preparing for this and preparing for the retreat and thinking about my presentation, I've done a lot of thinking about my journey, particularly with fear, and then what that means for where I've been in my life. And like you said, I've had really, so I've had some pretty scary things. I've had to face some major moments where I felt alone and scared and I most of them didn't seem to have a choice other than to stand up and do what I needed to do. I'm sure looking back I probably had a choice but there was something in me. I don't know if it was this fire or I've always had a very good intuition or at least an ability to listen to my gut and listen to my intuition. But I am not superwoman and I have had moments where I have been shaken and I have questioned my own gut and I've questioned my own intuition and I'm sure that all leaders feel this way where maybe 75% of the time you trust yourself but there are other times where you don't and whether it's made, you made a mistake or maybe you didn't make a mistake, maybe you're just shaken for some reason. And I think that, you know, I have had a natural ability to push past fear or get through it. I've had people along the way that have helped me. The majority of the time it's been me pushing. What I have found recently and in the last year is that sometimes when you're not able to trust your gut, you have to look around you and see what you have. And whether those are resources or tools or motivations or teammates or whatever it may be, like there are other ways people can push past fear no matter what your personality is. Right. I mean, we talk about lucky. You said that word. I said that word earlier. Like a lot of times I've looked back and said, I've just been lucky. Like I've done all this sort of effortlessly and naturally, but you know, not everybody operates that way. And if you want to, if we want to be able to teach people how to get through fear, because fear is debilitating and I have watched so many people I love and respect be debilitated by fear and move into inaction. And to me, that's the danger of fear, is when you feel like you can't move forward and can't make a decision. And if you're in a role where you have to make decisions to move something forward, that is scary and it's debilitating and it can be a bad thing. So, I am using this opportunity to think about how anybody, and no matter what your personality is, no matter if you are good at trusting your gut or not really how you can figure out How you can move past moments of terror in business even no matter where you are if you're a leader or not a leader Yeah, one thing that I so every episode I do this underline and bold And so each guest is trying to get to the underline and bold moment you say something and I'm like, okay, that's it So what you said in regards to like even in the moments where you're not trusting your gut, you don't know if you have it in you, and you have those moments that you are looking around for the resources and the people. And that was an underline of bold moment. It was because it's thinking through, like how do you gain strength or courage from either even looking backwards of how have you pushed past before, or the people in your life that also are telling you, you can do this and believe in you whenever you don't believe in yourself. I love that. But it's also a really good pivot point because you are presenting Pushing Past Fear in the upcoming Confident U Beach Retreat in September. I'm so pumped about this. Also, you're just an awesome storyteller. You just are. And so I'm eagerly, yes, I'm hosting it, but like, I'm a participant and I'm going to be taking notes. I hope I don't let you down. That's fear. I'm not trusting you. So but with that, I mean, everyone looks on the outside. And I see all these publications, especially recently. I feel like you've won a few awards. You've gotten recognition. You are in the spotlight. You're the CEO of Flock and Rally and someone would look at you and say, wow, she has it all together. Oh my goodness. How did she do it all? So like, what would you, what's your response to that? Well, I don't have it all together. I'm human. And I don't think most people have it all together. I think that the more we recognize that the people who are around us, whether they're friend or foe, are more like us than we want or know to believe, I think the better we all are. I mean, honestly, have I been successful in my career? Yes. Have I had to look backwards and try to figure out what has motivated me to be who I am, yes. And for me personally, you know, you mentioned the awards. We talk about that a lot because it's like a joke in the office that like, oh, Merit likes awards. And I've learned how to own it and talk about it and not be ashamed of it. And the reason that I can do that is because I realize that what drives me is impact. And when I receive an award, it may look like it's a selfish, like it's just about me and I'm feeling important or whatever. And it's not. What makes me excited about it is it's usually awards are recognizing some way I've had an impact. I like to be a change maker. I want to go into a place, an organization, a job, and I want to leave it at some point and look back and have had legacy or have had made things better, made people better. That's what drives me. And so I think in this fear conversation, right? Like the moments I've been the most afraid, I have to remind myself and ask myself why I do what I do. And why in the moments of being the most scared, if I can say, okay, this is scary, I'm going to walk straight through this and I'm not going to go around it, I'm not going to avoid it, I'm not going to be moved into inaction, I'm going to move through this. When I'm the most scared, I have to ask myself, you know, am I living my purpose? Am I doing what I need to be doing? And that's usually what helps me get out of that moment is saying like, okay, I'm trying to look forward and see what's the impact, what comes from this, whatever the action is that I'm scared of doing. And if I can see the positive, I can see where it's going, I can move through it. And I know that's not vague, right? I mean, but it's just reminding yourself like, okay, why am I doing what I'm doing? Why is it scary? Is it scary? Because I've never done it before? Is it scary because I know the outcome? Is it scary because I can't predict the outcome? Is it scary because I'm alone? Is it scary because I feel like I'm going to make the wrong decision? Right? In that moment, whatever it is, I say, okay, what am I actually trying to do? What is, why is this so scary? And then, you know, looking towards the positive. That was a super powerful though. I mean, on the other hand, you know, there are, there are actual tips and tricks that I will be sharing during the presentation that I'm not going to necessarily give away here that actually kind of deal with the opposite of what I just said because it's, you focus on the positive, but the way that I've had to manage it in the past, literally getting through the scary moments, is actually dealing with the negative and making a plan. And it's I mean, it's just sort of like situational planning where they you know, you literally think about what's the worst case scenario and you make an actual plan for every single thing that could happen that would be wrong. And then you feel fully prepared no matter what happens. And what I have found is 100 percent of the time worst case scenario never happens. And so I don't know if it's just a mental exercise that has helped me, but I'm going to share the actual steps in the presentation so that people, if they're not like me, right, if they don't have the same amount of tuition or ability to listen to it or whoever they are, you can have the same, you know, tips and tricks to actually walk through a moment of fear. You can't just keep perpetuating their fear, oh my goodness, which leads to it's debilitating, it's lacks of, you know, basically you feel stuck and stagnant in that moment. And then, guess what, I don't know if you do this, but you go in a spiral of them thinking poorly about yourself, oh my goodness, why am I being so hard on myself that I'm being afraid of this moment? And whenever, I think it's okay to also feel the emotion but like have a process. Yeah To get to the other side. Yeah, right and that yeah And that's what I hope to be able to bring and give some if whoever who's there that gets to have this wonderful presentation It's the actual I mean practical tips because as I mentioned in the beginning I've thought a lot about this and I know this may sound I don't mean this to sound arrogant, but I recognize that not everybody is born to be a leader. Not everybody is born to be an extrovert, period. People are made in very different ways. And I am not like other people. And so for me to just tell people, well, this is how I do it, or this is just who I am, I just do it naturally. I just don't, I don't know. I feel like it's more important to think about the practical uses or the practical steps, the actual tips and tricks that anybody could do to get them through fear. Because, I don't know, I've just had to figure that out in my own brain, because some of it has come really naturally to me and easy to me. I'll be honest and say that it's gotten harder over time. The larger the responsibility, the larger the role, it is a lot scarier. I mean, and listen, I came right out of college with a very important job. I mean, I don't want to get into the negatives, but it was a serious job. I mean, it gave me an enormous amount of perspective in life because, you know, there were injuries and scary moments and And it was not just on events and marketing and promotions. And it taught me a lot. But I have to say, even now, my job, I care about it so much that it feels sometimes scarier. Like the stakes are higher. And anybody who owns their own business, runs a company, is responsible for people's payroll, is responsible for other people's livelihoods. I mean, that can creep into your brain and create an enormous amount of anxiety. And so, I mean, I think big picture, the reality is that any leader of any company, CEO or not, fear is a major part of your job. And learning how to move through it, push past it, understand it, dissect it, is really important, because you're never gonna be without fear, I don't think. You're never going to be without fear. And that's another underline and bold statement here because that's the thing. People will look outside and say, hey, but you've already conquered. You've been the executive director of the Five Points Association. You've worked in state government. You've overcome all these hurdles. Well, what shouldn't it reduce as you go along? And that's the opposite for myself included. Right. I've built a business and a really successful one at that, sold it. But that doesn't mean like, dude, how do you operate with fear every day? Just walk up and own it. Like wake up, own it. Do you agree with that? Absolutely. And name it, own it. Really get good at talking about what are you actually afraid of? Because sometimes if you take the time to dissect it, to really look inside and understand, you may find that it's very reasonable fear, or you may find it's not reasonable fear. And it doesn't make it right or wrong. Sometimes it's just based in maybe an insecurity that you have, or maybe it's an actual, like, scary thing, like you could lose a contractor, right? Like, figure out what you're really afraid of first, before you try to deal with it. Figure it out. I mean, and it may take some time. It may take writing. It may be talking to somebody. It may take using other tools and resources that you have, but name it and understand what you're afraid of. And then it's, you can't solve that or move through that until you really know what you're afraid of. And even then, I mean, sometimes you know why you're afraid and it's still scary, but that's why there are other things you can do like walk go through all the way to the worst case scenario literally write it down make a plan work backwards from it and And then you have a plan and that helps your brain Enormously, like if you know if your brain understands that you you have a plan You've already done the hard work to figure out how you survive I mean, and I I don't I don't want to give you all the examples, but like, don't, don't. I mean, they're not inappropriate or anything. It's just like my, my more immature brain. When I first started experiencing true fear in a leader role, the things that I would imagine about my worst case scenarios and how I would plan for them. I mean, it would be like all the way to, I'll just wait tables. I'll live with my parents. I mean, like literally I was thinking through an actual plan if everything I was afraid of happened. And then I was like, oh, that's not so bad. Like I'll be fine. You're like, you know. That's exactly right though. I mean, you can live with the worst case scenario. Come on. That's right. Like that's where I think all the quotes came from or the memes were like, did you die? But did you die? Did you die? Right. It's up to you to push that good perspective. Yeah. Merit, this has been so good. I don't know if you realize how many nuggets of information that you're giving, even in this small time together, a little over 20 minutes. And so I just think that you've given, naming it is huge, but even helping with understanding a worst case scenario and working through some of those pieces. I mean, even the folks that aren't attending the retreat, they're going to walk away. And I think there's going to be a lot of self-reflection here of how can I work through what's in front of me? How can I push through these hurdles? But I think for the folks that are attending the retreat, and I think everyone, I talk to every facilitator and the attendees, and we're all so excited about how do we push past fear because what you said is absolutely true. Everyone in each stage of your life, you know, no matter position, title, years of experience, what have you, fear is there and it's not going away. So how do you understand it, name it, dissect it, and then what's your process for pushing past it? So that's amazing. And I think that we can take for granted some of the practices that we do, definitely that you do, because there are so many women and so many people that I work with that really need help. Do you agree with that? I do. I do. I see it. I see it a lot. I see, like I said earlier, it sometimes leads to inaction. And inaction can be detrimental to a growing, changing company or whatever the goals are, the organization, but inaction can be detrimental to businesses and to people. I like to quote my old boss because he always said that the key is to walk through the fear. And that doesn't sound like a deep concept, it just sounds very simple. But for whatever reason, when I heard him say that, it resonated with me. And so, like you said, for the people who may not be able to go to the retreat, may not be able to get some of the more practical tips and the storytelling that I'll do, I think that that's a really important takeaway, is if you're looking at fear, you just have to tell yourself to walk through it. You can't go around it. You can't be stopped by it. You just have to keep moving and move through it. And that's right there. Underline bold, drop mic. So thank you for that. That is a perfect segue into learning more about Clock & Rally. First off, I have to say, we are finishing up registration for the Confident U Beach Retreat. and I'm so excited. If you want to learn how to push past fear, get some practical application here, apply it to your everyday life, and I could be personally or professionally, then I need you. I need you to sign up. Hello! Feel free to register and you get, I mean, up close and personal with Merrick and Neely. And you can ask her any question because we're also doing a speakers panel, so that's super cool as well. But before we go, I really also want to take a moment to learn more about Flock & Rally and just share with our listeners, tell me just a little snippet about Flock & Rally. You're like, keep it short, Merit. I don't have the ability to do that, Jada. Flock & Rally, we are a full-service integrated communications marketing firm, Columbia, South Carolina. We have 20 employees now. It's very exciting. We help clients level up. We do everything in the marketing and communications field. We do beautiful, wonderful branding, everything from paid media, social media, building a website, PR, lots of media relations. We build relationships and we make community connections, and that's what makes us special. Everyone I meet at Falcon Rally, even when we're going through the interview process, I'm like, hmm, there's a special secret sauce to every employee. It's hard to pinpoint, but they're just authentic, good humans that are so talented and work so hard. I love the work you do. Actually, a link to your website is below as well as to your LinkedIn profile. So feel free to connect and thank you so much for being a part of B2B. You're the best. Thank you, Dana. All right, we'll see you next time, but I will stop there. Every episode I have to end with this. Choose your heart. Everything you want is on the other side of heart. Choose your heart.