Olivia Wade on the Intersection of Cheffing, Transformation and Spiritual Healing

When resilience meets the culinary arts, magic happens in the kitchen and beyond. That's exactly the case with our incredible guest Olivia Wade, whose story of triumph is as rich and complex as her flavors. Together, we reminisce about the zest and harmony that comes from a synergistic kitchen team, reflecting on the unforgettable experiences we've crafted for diners. Olivia opens up about her early leadership roles and the grueling health battles that came her way. With a spirit that refuses to be dampened, she shares how she fought through intense treatments and alternative therapies, turning her trials into a testament of unyielding strength.

Shifting gears to my own journey, I've discovered that sometimes the path to healing others starts with healing oneself. The transition from a café manager to a Reiki practitioner from the comfort of my living room during the pandemic was unexpected, but it became a beacon of hope for many. My evolution didn't stop there; I stepped into the realm of clinical sexology and somatic work, embracing the profound impact of body awareness in healing. The stories I've collected are a mosaic of personal growth and the restorative power of creating safe spaces for the deepest parts of ourselves.

As we wrap up the conversation, we explore how self-care isn't just a buzzword—it's a cornerstone for those in leadership and hospitality. Sharing insights into the life-altering impact of Reiki and energy work, we discuss finding balance and the attraction of a positive mindset. The serendipitous partnership with my mother, which blossomed into a thriving business, serves as a beacon of hope and possibility during the most uncertain times. We cap off the episode by contemplating the flow state that comes with being fully present, whether in the rush of a busy kitchen or the quiet moments of life. Join us for a heartwarming episode that's equal parts inspiration and practical wisdom, served with a side of genuine soul.

Thank you Olivia!!
https://www.olivia-wade.com/

Thank you to our listeners!!

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Transcript

Chef James: 0:14

Hey everyone, welcome to Chef Sense. I'm your host, chef Massey. Welcome to the podcast, olivia Wade, it's so good to see you.

Olivia : 0:21

It's so good to see you too. I'm so happy to be here this is great For you guys.

Chef James: 0:26

Just so you get kind of a backstory on this. We've known of each other for a few years now but definitely had the opportunity to get jamming in a kitchen not long ago, so it was so much fun. You know we're both energy people and you know we vibe together. You know let's just jam.

Olivia : 0:44

And it was.

Chef James: 0:45

It was kind of fun.

Olivia : 0:53

And yeah, we had a blast. I mean I, I absolutely love working with you. It's it's really rare to find other chefs other cooks who you really feel like. This is a collaboration.

Chef James: 1:01

Oh yeah, sure.

Olivia : 1:02

This is an energetic collaboration. We're floating across the kitchen, we're like, we're communicating in this effortless and easy way and we're having fun.

Chef James: 1:10

Yeah, yeah right, it's not, there's no animosity.

Olivia : 1:12

We're not like stepping on each other's toes. No, no, supporting each other and that's such a rare dynamic to find in a kitchen, and, and I just you know, that's what I live for. You know when I'm back in kitchens and when I do my little, like I show up and kind of somebody's called out and here I am.

Chef James: 1:30

And I'm in the menu.

Olivia : 1:32

you know 10 minutes before service and that's like my specialty, but it can be awkward. You know I can come in and someone can be like really Like. You know, like I got a lot of of ego and there's a lot of ego in kitchens. Oh, there are I mean, yeah, it's unbelievable, yeah.

Chef James: 1:48

But I think it's a special thing where, you know, I don't know, I think you over time you become seasoned. You know, I was raised by the industry, so were you.

Chef James: 1:57

And I think that you know, also in leadership, it is that indigenous side to me that don't take my kindness for a weakness and I can be direct and assertive, but I don't find that I do it when I need to do it, because the team can breathe, we can function, I can get their clarity too, because I'm not perfect and you move through things so much smoother that synergy occurs.

Chef James: 2:22

And it's not this, like you know, again you're jamming over there and I may see something and I know if I can help you finish, or you help me finish, or or we're doing whatever, you know that's, it's this coexistence sort of style that I believe in, that it doesn't really we're in for the guest, you know, and we're in for someone that comes in. They could have the worst day of their life or just a rough day at work, and we have that opportunity to kind of nourish them, change that mindset, because maybe they've had something that we've replicated, that they got from their grandmother, from whatever right or a family thing, and that's the beauty of food is you can take people on a journey, yeah, and you're going along with it too, and so working with you in, there we were you know a few things that I'm always appreciative of you and your talents.

Chef James: 3:12

You know. I think there's so many things that are important to me about you in sharing on the podcast. You're one of ours that are well. First of all, you're talented, no matter what you do, that's a, that's a huge gift. You know people. You'll have a whole lifetime to try to captivate that kind of energy. But when you're looking at transitioning, you know you were raised in the kitchen and you transitioned into something else very special. So if you could kind of talk about that and enlighten our listeners, that'd be amazing.

Olivia : 3:41

Absolutely. So. I cut my teeth in the food service industry starting at the age of 17. I was managing my first business by 18 years old and I worked in the food service industry until I was 25, 26. And I got really, really sick and I was at the time managing a kitchen. I really fell apart. I mean it was I was doing a hundred covers almost every night, like 80 to a hundred covers, with two people in the kitchen and I think our menu had like 30 things on it. I mean it was really it was unusual.

Olivia : 4:19

It was an unusual even for the food service industry it was an unusual situation and I'd burnt out before but I'd managed to kind of bring myself back from that, but this was like pure and total burnout. I had a mold bloom in my house. I found out I had Lyme's disease and then I found out I had the worst case of lead poisoning that any doctor in this area had ever seen.

Olivia : 4:43

Wow, like ever I had. You're supposed to have no more than 0.03 parts per million of lead in your blood. I had 110. Holy cow. And so you know I began this really insane process. I lost about half of my possessions to mold. I moved out of my house. I spent years of my life doing IV antibiotics, ozone therapy, all of the supplements you've ever heard of, really wild alternative treatments, diets, exercise I mean just anything. We did what my doctor called throwing the kitchen sink at it. Wow, and I did that for many, many years.

Chef James: 5:29

Okay.

Olivia : 5:31

And kind of the culmination of that experience was my first metaport that I had in my right arm was inserted, and that was fine. And then a couple of years later they inserted a second metaport in my left arm and it clipped a branch of my vagus nerve oh so what a metaport is a peripherally inserted catheter, basically, that they insert into, like lyme patients for iv antibiotics, cancer patients for um chemotherapy and you know various other. But what it does is it prevents you from having to have needles stuck in you all the time.

Chef James: 6:08

Oh, okay, like a port.

Olivia : 6:10

Right, it's like a port, it's just an it's an, it's a like a peripherally inserted port instead of a centrally inserted port. Yeah, so they run it with an EKG up your one of your large veins through to the like. Basically it dumps out over the top of one of the vena cavas of your heart. So you're literally sending the antibiotics straight into your heart, which then pushes them through the rest of the body. And I may be, you know, a little like lax on the exact details of that.

Chef James: 6:37

I don't know, it sounds pretty good to me. I mean, it's a challenging horrific journey, but you obviously gained your knowledge. Anybody that goes through something so tragic like that I'm sure you gain. I mean you want to know, like what are we doing?

Olivia : 6:58

Where are we going? Because I was doing so much research and I was working with so many different practitioners. But the part of the catheter that was inserted up my vein it hit a branch of my vagus nerve near my collarbone. Okay, wow, and the vagus nerve controls a wide amount of functions in the body, so it helps regulate your heart rate, your digestion, your balance.

Olivia : 7:29

Like you're it's, it's, it's basically all of your essential functioning in your body, um, and this is how, how we see, um, why the nervous system is so important, right? So in my work now, I do a lot of work with the nervous system.

Chef James: 7:45

Okay.

Olivia : 7:46

And you don't really. You don't really know how important your nervous system is, until it's messed up.

Chef James: 7:53

Yeah, yeah, yeah, my heart rate is my resting heart rate was 175.

Olivia : 8:01

Um, extreme waves of nausea, dizziness, vertigo. I mean it was like just an anxiety, like I was living inside of the worst panic attack. I've ever had Right, so it was just like pure panic, my whole body and um and so obviously at this point I'm not working at all. Yeah, and so in the process of going on this journey to kind of try to figure out how to heal my nervous system right, there was a period of time where any like any good sensation, like someone, like holding you or like, just like running their hand over your arm Like that for me was just pure pain, wow.

Chef James: 8:47

Like, like searing pain.

Olivia : 8:49

It was like it would send like a wave of searing pain up my whole, my whole arm, and and so, essentially, pleasure equaled pain in my body and I was like well, I can't live like this. This isn't like a this isn't a sustainable thing.

Chef James: 9:04

Sure so.

Olivia : 9:05

I have to figure out how to fix this, I have to figure out how to heal this, and so I started, um, I started doing heart math, and heart math, um, if you don't know, is basically a series of uh, breathing exercises that are centered on utilizing the heart, which is like, if you think of the heart as the control center, yep, for emotions, for your nervous system, the heart is like your command control.

Chef James: 9:35

Okay.

Olivia : 9:36

And so what you do is you work with the heart, you regulate the heart, you bring the heart into a state of coherence, which is optimal function, which then essentially helps the rest of the body go into a state of rest and restore go into a state of resilience. So we increase the body's resilience, we increase our capacity to handle and adapt to stress, and so I started working with heart math for myself.

Olivia : 10:05

And you know I was still dying, I was still really at the edge of existence at this point and my mother had decided that she wanted to do her Reiki training and she had been doing Reiki with a practitioner for a long time and she was like I'm going to do my Reiki training. I think you know you've tried everything. Why not? Why not get Reiki so that you can do Reiki on yourself?

Chef James: 10:35

Right.

Olivia : 10:36

And I was like, well, you know, I've you know, it was like a last ditch effort.

Chef James: 10:40

Yeah, that's it All right.

Olivia : 10:42

Fine, sure, whatever I mean anything, I was reaching at straws. At that point I was like, okay, um, and so I got my, I got my Reiki level one and I did Reiki on myself for a year, and in that year I I'm I'm not kidding Everything that was not serving me had to go, and it was immediate, it was brutal. My entire life that I had built up to that point completely fell apart. Every relationship, everything that wasn't working for me just disappeared. Absolute rock bottom, the deepest depths of human suffering, and everything was stripped away from me to the point at which the only thing at the center was me.

Chef James: 11:30

Okay, right, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what rock bottom is. Yeah, yeah, right, right.

Olivia : 11:34

It's like everything gets stripped away and there's just you and your essential self and you're like okay, you know and I always tell people who are going through really difficult times that rock bottom is an extremely powerful place, because in rock bottom the ego gets destroyed and we are desperate.

Chef James: 11:56

I'll do anything right, I'll change.

Olivia : 11:59

And so I came up from that. I ended up in the hospital for a little while in the cardiac unit of Bay State, and I ended up in the hospital for a little while, um, in the cardiac unit of Bay state, and I got out of the hospital and I was like, okay, none of this is working.

Olivia : 12:12

Nothing nothing is working None of the diets, none of the things, none of the way that I've been treating myself, the toxic, horrible relationship that I'm in, like the person that I'm living with, like it's all not working. And I was supposed to go do my Reiki practitioner training. Like four days after I got out of the hospital, wow, and so shaking and a complete and an utter wreck, I show up for my Reiki practitioner training.

Olivia : 12:41

Oh, my gosh and I was like the last thing I thought in the world was that I was going to become a Reiki practitioner. Right, I was just like I'm going to get all this Reiki knowledge and somehow maybe it'll help me and um, and I don't know what to say. I mean, the sword chooses you sometimes.

Chef James: 12:57

Absolutely Yep.

Olivia : 12:58

And and so I. I get there, I get through the training and I'm barely holding it together. I'm drinking 17 cups of tea and I'm shaking and I'm a mess and one of the requirements for completing my Reiki practitioner training, which was going to take a year. Most of the time you go for a weekend and that's the thing that you do, and you get it and then you start practicing. But this was a much more intense, intensive experience and I had to take 25 practice clients.

Chef James: 13:30

Oh, wow.

Olivia : 13:31

So suddenly I was like getting better, I was sober, I was living with my mother, I was like at my rock bottom.

Chef James: 13:45

Yeah.

Olivia : 13:47

And I had a bunch of clients.

Chef James: 13:49

Wow man, no pressure.

Olivia : 13:52

No pressure.

Chef James: 13:52

Oh, my gosh Okay.

Olivia : 13:55

And I was meditating, I was meditating for two to three hours a day.

Chef James: 13:58

Oh, wow.

Olivia : 13:59

And we're still in like pandemic times, right. Okay, this is like three and a half years ago, yep, and we're still in pandemic time. So I have like people like coming over to my living room to like be on the table in my living room. And I suddenly realized that all these people were getting better.

Chef James: 14:22

Wow, that's amazing.

Olivia : 14:24

Like I was doing Reiki on all these people and things were changing for them. Their lives were changing. Huge big things in their lives were changing their outlook and their jobs and everything was aligning for them and they started wanting to come back to see me and I was like, okay, I guess I'm doing this. And and it took me about six months to realize that not only were they getting better, but I was getting better- Okay.

Olivia : 14:56

Right Like I'd my. My whole nervous system had stopped vibrating so hard. I had to sleep in a swing instead of in a bed, you know like. I, I could, I could sleep in a bed again without my whole body vibrating so hard. I couldn't sleep. And you know, all these things just started to get easier. Better, you know, like I, I, my my mind cleared, I had more energy, um, and and so I've always been in a service profession.

Olivia : 15:26

Yeah Right, I've been in the service industry since I was 17. And suddenly I found myself in service.

Chef James: 15:35

Yeah Right, exactly, it's not like it was any different.

Olivia : 15:37

Really, I'm in service. I managed a cafe for a long time. I sat and I listened to people talk about their you know I watched their children grow up I, you know I listened. You know I watched their children grow up I, you know I I listened. You know I. People came in crying and I handed them coffee and a and a cookie and you know, it wasn't really any different in a lot of ways, um, but I was different.

Olivia : 16:01

Yeah Right, like I. I found inside of myself what it truly meant to be of service.

Chef James: 16:06

That's amazing.

Olivia : 16:07

And and my experiences, all of the things that I went through, the the depths of the suffering that I went through, and all and all of those things. They became useful in that context.

Chef James: 16:18

Okay, yeah, right.

Olivia : 16:19

Because someone could come to me and be like my life is falling apart. I'm at I'm at the very end of my rope is falling apart. I'm at the very end of my rope. I'm under so much stress. This is happening. This is happening, and I could honestly tell them the things were going to get better. Yeah, wow, because I could hold hope for them when they couldn't have it.

Chef James: 16:37

That's really that's amazing.

Olivia : 16:39

I mean that because if I could get a phrase. Okay, If I could get better.

Chef James: 16:43

Yeah, anyone could Sure Wow, that is powerful.

Olivia : 16:46

If I could spend the beginning half of my life destroying myself. If I could get better, anyone could.

Chef James: 16:51

Wow, that's. That's so awesome.

Olivia : 16:53

And that's how I ended up doing what I do, you know. And then I expanded my work into, um, sexual wellness, which is really an incredibly underserved, um, an underserved bracket of therapeutics. Um, you know, I often tell people, you know, when they come and they sit and they're like awkward, and they're sitting and they're trying to talk to me about things, and I'm like give yourself some credit, because this is stuff we don't even talk to our therapists about.

Olivia : 17:21

Right, right, right, yeah, and so you know, I, I then discovered that my mission or my purpose was to create a space so safe that your deepest, darkest things, your things that you were struggling with the most, your, you know, your marriage or your relationship, or that they were all safe in the container.

Chef James: 17:45

So is that called sexology? It is. Is that right Okay?

Olivia : 17:49

I'm a board-certified clinical sexologist. I went to a college in British Columbia for two years that specialized in somatic clinical sexology and healing, wow Okay. And so all of the practices that I do work with the body right, because that's where all of the things that we experience are stored right. They're all stored in our tissues right, you always hear this kind of old adage the issues are in the tissues, which I think is really funny.

Chef James: 18:20

Wow, that's catchy, isn't that catchy? No, that makes sense.

Olivia : 18:24

And often, you know, we end up in like traditional talk therapy, which is really, really helpful and can be extremely effective. And and sometimes there are people who are like I've been at this for 10 years why isn't this doing what I want it to do?

Chef James: 18:36

Yeah.

Olivia : 18:37

Right, and I myself have been in therapy since I was 14 and I I see a therapist every week, Um, but I also do somatic work, which and somatic is breath, movement, mindfulness, body awareness right. Somatic is sensory so it's sight, taste, touch, smell, hearing. Okay, and when we work with our body, we work with our senses, we bypass the mind.

Chef James: 19:12

Okay.

Olivia : 19:13

So we can actually heal things in the body that we may not have a, we may not have a like an intellectual grasp on.

Chef James: 19:24

Okay, right, there may be grief.

Olivia : 19:25

We might not know what that grief is.

Chef James: 19:27

Or where it's from.

Olivia : 19:28

It could be epigenetic. It could be from our family lineage. And we don't know how to name it, but we know what it is and we know what it feels like in our body. It feels like tightness in the chest, or it feels like tingles going up the back of my neck, or it feels like every time I'm in a room full of people, I I lose my ability to speak.

Olivia : 19:50

Right, that's happening in the body okay yeah of course sure and so you know most of my work is integrative all right it works with the mind, the heart and the body yeah and, and and and sexuality, which is a huge component of what we overlook in our society, absolutely yeah. So that's how I ended up doing what I'm doing, yeah, which is just a wild ride, yeah.

Chef James: 20:21

I mean those are some big categories. I mean you're doing Reiki, the sexology heart math, heart math. I mean you're doing Reiki, the sexology heart math, heart math. So you do like couples and you do group workshops too, right, yeah, I do group workshops.

Olivia : 20:33

I work with couples. My real joy is working with couples in one-on-one in that really intimate container where it's like you know oftentimes what I'll do when I work with couples, and I find this to be really effective is. I'll see each of them separately to begin with. Oh, okay, that makes sense, I get this this sense, this feeling, for what is their relationship feel like to each one of them individually?

Chef James: 21:00

Yeah, that's important. Yeah, I can see that.

Olivia : 21:02

And then we bring them together, right so?

Chef James: 21:04

we give them.

Olivia : 21:05

we give them practice, I give them practices that they have to practice together, even though I'm seeing them separately.

Chef James: 21:11

Yup.

Olivia : 21:11

And then I talk about what are those practices? How are those working for you?

Chef James: 21:15

Right.

Olivia : 21:15

You know, when we get creative, we say like, what is it you're working with and what practices can we give you that are going to specifically target that thing that you're working? With together and then they go and they do their practices and they report back right Wow. And then, after a couple of sessions, we bring them together. Okay, and they come in together and then we work on partnered practices together, breathing exercises. We work on partnered heart math. So regulating your nervous system, so that your partner's nervous system can regulate to yours.

Chef James: 21:48

That's wow. That's so much energy and just support it's.

Olivia : 21:52

You know how do we support each other. Okay, Right, yeah.

Chef James: 21:55

And I have to say, like going into, because we've done some sessions on Reiki yeah, it's powerful stuff and it's, you know, very enlightening.

Chef James: 22:05

You know what you come away with and there is a sense of because, again, being an energy person, I can say on my behalf that there's this, there were some interesting things that occurred. I can kind of remember, you know, that you were on one side and there was actually a presence on the other side of me that had put a hand down. I'm actually getting goosebumps from it right now, so, but you know, there's things that you kind of shared and enlightened me, you know, and also, being that leader, it does go to the core of who I am and that was very powerful to hear about. But it's also very important to clear that right to take that energy and put it somewhere else. And I and you know it's unbelievable too because you know, there's like a tingling, there's a there are there are sensations you know that it's like it's very specific and it's really amazing.

Chef James: 23:08

And you know also, when you're done with that, it's kind of like you know being cleansed in a sense, right Right.

Olivia : 23:16

It's harmonizing your energy.

Chef James: 23:18

Right and you know, I don't know if you can go into that, those details, or if it's available, but you know, just in the sense of you know the prayers and you know the crystal and the things that you use, it's.

Olivia : 23:30

Yeah, yeah, I'm, I'm happy to go into detail on that Um, and you know, the beautiful thing that um that I experienced with you is is oftentimes I will, I will really see all the way through, you know, to the core of someone when.

Olivia : 23:49

I'm working on them, and and and I can feel you know when I'm, when I'm sitting with you or when I'm working with you, the the incredible leader that you are, and and how that informs and translates into everything that you do and every way that you inhabit the world, and how blessed and how lucky we are in this world to have you as a leader in it.

Chef James: 24:17

Well, I really appreciate that.

Olivia : 24:20

Yeah, and the practice of Reiki is really about. Reiki means universal life force energy, right, so my mother often describes it as being meditated over or being meditated on right, Like you're being meditated on right and the beauty. You know, one of the most beautiful things about Reiki is that it's incredibly gentle right, You're you're. You're fully clothed, it's not like a massage. You're like wrapped in warm blankets, you're like swaddled, basically.

Olivia : 24:57

It's pretty amazing, you just get swaddled and then like, and then you get meditated over Um, and, and it creates this deep state of relaxation in the nervous system where actually, like, one of the big things that it's doing is, it's just creating space for you to realign with your true essential self.

Chef James: 25:22

That's extremely powerful.

Olivia : 25:24

It is.

Chef James: 25:24

You know, and I think it can be a little scary too for some people.

Chef James: 25:25

It is, you know, and I think it can be a little scary too for some people, it can you know when you're like I mean you're laying there and you're feeling a level of vibration, a physical occurrence, and you're like what's going on? Yeah, you know, but for me, being indigenous, we are very connected, our feet are connected to the center of this earth, that everything resonates through us. And so as you work your process, you know, it's kind of like I do feel, as leaders and as human beings we're, we have some level of I don't even know if it's a real word, but magnetization right, that I will absorb. With a team.

Chef James: 26:05

I've had the great pleasure of leading large and small teams, multiple outlets, and I can say, when I step into the chaos that comes at me, yes, and I absorb that and I lovingly step into that with the teams and these leaders and they can sense my presence, in which we are going to survive this and my responsibility is to shift and move wherever the team needs me, and that's the example set for all leadership and to protect the people. So that's where I think in life we have these relationships. We have things outside. We've got our children, we've got our loved ones and we're just constantly building on that, stacking it on the magnet Right. I mean, it's just, it's like there's the layers of the onion.

Olivia : 26:56

Yeah.

Chef James: 26:56

And so to peel that away to get to oneself. I highly believe that Reiki is very essential for myself. Yeah, to peel that away so that you know that glass isn't overflowing, it's half full or you know it's lower.

Olivia : 27:12

Yeah.

Chef James: 27:13

Self-care is very important and it goes back to our industry.

Olivia : 27:16

Yeah, it really does.

Chef James: 27:18

You know we need to clear ourselves. Whether you're a cook, a dishwasher, a server, a busser any one of us because you're in hospitality you could be a front desk agent. You know you are dealing with people that need something from you at all times, at all times. So we have this tendency to fall into this codependent sort of existence that we're fighters. We just get right into it, and I think that's where sometimes maladaptive behaviors can step in, especially in our industry.

Olivia : 27:49

More than anywhere else Right.

Chef James: 27:52

So you know, and I think that's why you know, the beauty of it is is having you in here, share your journey this way and for people to hear that there's great things to do, whether it's hiking or going to the gym or going fishing or whatever that can clear you. You're doing something for yourself, but there's also spiritual sides. I feel so much more important, like these opportunities to work with you that help to make me a better person and leader, right? So, anyways, looking at your situation, you also do personal chefing too, correct? Do you want to talk about some of the programming you offer with that? Because is there mindfulness or is there?

Olivia : 28:32

So you know, I'd love to expand into that.

Chef James: 28:34

Okay.

Olivia : 28:35

Into like mindful eating dinners and things like that. Right now I do, like you know, I got to this point where in my life I've like done private dinners for, like Danny Meyer and, um, you know, a lot of other kind of notable people and, um and uh, the mayor of Newton has been one of my clients for a while. And I really, really love her um and her family and they're just incredible.

Olivia : 29:06

And, um, I've worked with a lot of really incredible people, but I got to this point where it was like you know and I hate to say this but in order for me to not be doing Reiki and not be doing clinical work, you have to pay me so much money to show up at your house and cook food for you, right, right and and and that is just you know if I'm going to step away from my essential work helping people transform and move into a space where I'm transforming something for someone else, which is really what food is You're?

Olivia : 29:45

taking these raw ingredients, you're transforming them, you're transmuting them. It's alchemy Cooking is alchemy, cooking is energetic alchemy, you are transforming these ingredients into something beautiful and in an offering, and in order for me to do that, you have to pay me a lot of money to show up. Well, hey, that's a great boundary, it is, it's a really good boundary, and so I don't have a lot of private to show. Well, hey, that's a great boundary, it is.

Olivia : 30:08

It's a really good boundary, and so I don't have a lot of private cooking because, really, like that work for me is so devotional and I want to be able to step fully into that devotion and give every ounce of my energy, every ounce of my attention, to creating that menu, to executing that meal, to finding just the right person to come help me, and then to creating an evening that's gonna that's gonna blow your mind right If. I'm in that space. I need it to be, I need it to be transformative.

Chef James: 30:42

Right.

Olivia : 30:44

Um, but you know, as I, I as I move out into the world with workshops, and you know other things I did a Valentine's Day workshop two years ago. That was phenomenal. It was a couple's workshop.

Chef James: 30:57

And I cooked.

Olivia : 30:58

If I cooked a four course meal for fun it was super fun, so we had a four course meal and then we did this beautiful couple workshop, Um, and that kind of stuff is.

Olivia : 31:08

Is is really exciting for me and um, and as I kind of discover, really I'm looking for, like, who wants to work with me? Yeah Right, Because in the field of couples intimacy work in the field of sexual wellness, in the field of Reiki, it takes a very specific business to want to be like, yes, you and everything that you offer, we want to support you Okay, yep. Right, because a lot of the time there's still um, there's still bias, or they're still conditioning around like what intimacy work is or what you know and they don't want to say.

Olivia : 31:49

They don't want to say, oh, this is a, this is an authentic lineage based Tantra workshop, or this is a couple's intimacy workshop. They don based tantra workshop, or this is a couple's intimacy workshop. They don't want to advertise that, which is the kind of um, the barrier that I've run up against. Yep, um, and so I've done a lot of things myself okay, you know which is great, um, but I'm just kind of like I'm.

Olivia : 32:10

I'm in this space where I'm like I have a lot of things on the back burner yes, yeah, I'm sliding them up gently and I'm like kind of?

Chef James: 32:17

yeah, I'm gonna slide up, I'm gonna look at them.

Olivia : 32:19

I'm gonna be like is this the right thing? It's not quite done yet. We're gonna put it back on the back burner yeah, yeah and um, and my cooking metaphor is trance.

Chef James: 32:27

They just they're in everything. No, hey, that's you're. You're in it for life.

Olivia : 32:33

Now, yeah, yeah exactly, and uh and so you know, it's like I think the way that I've operated the best and the way that I always operate is is my work is not a work of promotion, it's a work of attraction. Yeah, okay, right Because the right people, the right things, the right experiences. They're going to find me and and they're going to be aligned if they find me.

Chef James: 32:55

Yeah.

Olivia : 32:56

Right, and if I'm out out there and I'm reaching, if I'm reaching for something, it's not working for me Now that's not true for a lot of people.

Chef James: 33:03

Right, right.

Olivia : 33:05

They need to grind, they need to reach, they need to do that. That almost killed me. Yes, right, right so you know, for me it's about getting really solid in myself, right? I get out into the forest three days a week. I do yoga two or three days a week. I, you know, I hike with my dog. I'm, like you know, cooking myself really good food.

Chef James: 33:32

That's great.

Olivia : 33:32

I'm really enjoying all of my client sessions and working with people, really enjoying all of my client sessions and working with people, and, and and. The more that I just take care of myself, the more that radiates out into the world around me, for sure, and so. I've had to really change the way that I inhabit the world.

Chef James: 33:50

Yeah, yeah.

Olivia : 33:50

So that now I'm just kind of like all right, here I am.

Chef James: 33:54

Right.

Olivia : 33:55

And I'm going to go to the places that want me.

Chef James: 33:59

Yep.

Olivia : 33:59

That's pretty awesome. Yeah, that's, that's really, that's really great Okay.

Chef James: 34:03

Wow, well cool, that sounds exciting.

Olivia : 34:06

It is yeah. Yeah, it's a lot less effort.

Chef James: 34:09

Right, yeah, yeah and.

Olivia : 34:11

I've and I you know, I've have found beautiful partnerships and incredible working environments, and I opened a business with my mother. Yeah, I own a family practice.

Chef James: 34:23

That's so cool, though, which?

Olivia : 34:25

is so cool. Back to Heart Center was born in the living room of my mother's house, in the middle of the pandemic, and it was us just looking at each other and being like should we open a business together? Yeah, and here you are, you know, and here we are because it was the path of least resistance, because we love. We love working together because, there isn't anybody. I would rather be in business with Sure, I have an incredible relationship with my mother she has.

Olivia : 34:56

she has seen me through the absolute depths of suffering and she has just held steady. She has never tried to change me.

Chef James: 35:04

Wow, that's so wonderful. It has been most incredible.

Olivia : 35:06

We're totally different people.

Chef James: 35:08

Okay.

Olivia : 35:08

Right. Most incredible gift she's ever given me is my mother. Never tried to change me.

Chef James: 35:13

Wow.

Olivia : 35:13

She's just supported me becoming the person that I am. Wow.

Chef James: 35:17

Yeah, well, it sounds like the.

Olivia : 35:19

A team. Yeah, we are Right, and it was like the path of least resistance, like, okay, let's open a business together. Yeah, right, and it has been three years of just like everything is working.

Chef James: 35:29

Yeah.

Olivia : 35:30

Which is incredible, like and in an effortless way, yeah, in a way. That's like you know, we support each other and and you know we've had one sticky moment, maybe in three years. Yeah, in a way that's like. You know we support each other and, and you know we've had one sticky moment, maybe in three years yeah, we had to like reevaluate something.

Chef James: 35:44

Yeah.

Olivia : 35:44

And that was you know a day.

Chef James: 35:46

Sounds like destiny to me. Yeah, oh, absolutely yeah.

Olivia : 35:51

I think sometimes like I just needed to sit back and wait for destiny to find me.

Chef James: 35:55

Right.

Olivia : 35:56

Which was really hard, because I'm. I'm a cook.

Chef James: 35:59

Yeah, right, like what the like? Absolutely, yeah, you know it's so funny though it's like it's. Sometimes in life it's like it's it's not always what I want, but it's what I need. Yeah and oh.

Olivia : 36:13

Story of my life, you know getting redirected.

Chef James: 36:16

I'm always grateful for that. That's always presented itself to me. Yes, so being able to have that awareness is another gift. Yeah, because some people don't do that. Yeah, and there's a lot of, you know, more extra trials and tribulations and skewed paths, you know. But yeah, well, that's, that's so great.

Olivia : 36:38

I. I once had a partner of mine tell me I wish the universe screamed at me as loudly as it screams at you. That's awesome, and I was like that is the most apt description.

Chef James: 36:53

It really is Like it screams.

Olivia : 36:55

They were like I really wish the universe screamed at me that I was in the wrong place doing the wrong thing as loudly as the universe tells you. That's awesome and they were completely right.

Chef James: 37:05

Yeah, I know, I mean that's.

Olivia : 37:07

You know, as long as I'm paying attention.

Chef James: 37:09

Yep.

Olivia : 37:10

Right, like it flows, yep, and I think that that is essentially a thing that I learned in the food service industry that I had to transmute and relearn for myself. But if you are paying attention, right, If you are present. If you are really there, it flows. You know what to do. You'll pick up, you know everything could be on fire. You could have 40 tickets on the line and if you are dialed in to the exact moment that you're in, you know, we all know that moment that.

Olivia : 37:46

I'm talking about that flow state, that absolute fireplace where you're just like in it and it's working and you don't have a thought in your mind.

Chef James: 37:58

Yeah, it's beautiful.

Olivia : 37:58

And it's beautiful and and I think a lot of my life has been me learning how to access that space when things are quiet.

Chef James: 38:07

Ah, okay, wow.

Olivia : 38:09

When nothing is happening.

Chef James: 38:11

Yeah.

Olivia : 38:11

Because that is where, that is where that intuition is for me.

Chef James: 38:17

Yep.

Olivia : 38:17

Right In the middle of the quiet, in the middle of that nothing space where nothing is on fire and nothing is happening. Yeah, can I still hear that? Can I still be in that flow state? Can I still be as close to this present moment as humanly possible?

Chef James: 38:33

Yep, that's really cool, yeah, wow, well, we covered a lot.

Olivia : 38:40

We did.

Chef James: 38:40

So you know, first of all, thank you, we're so lucky to have you in our area, so how can people find you, schedule or contact?

Olivia : 38:50

Great question. So, um, I have a website that is my personal website, okay, and it's wwwolivia-wadecom Okay, and that has like direct. You can just directly schedule through my website.

Chef James: 39:09

Okay, that's great.

Olivia : 39:10

And that's like a really kind of easy. You can look at all the different things I do you can look at my bio. You can read a little the different things I do. You can look at my bio. You can read a little bit about the different practices and you can read about potential workshops I might be running community events. And then also my healing arts center that.

Olivia : 39:31

I co-own with my mother where I practice out of is called Back to Heart Center and if you just search Back to Heart Center, it should be the first thing that comes up.

Chef James: 39:40

if you're in this area. Hopefully we've done our Google search. You know, yeah, the SEO is right.

Olivia : 39:47

Um, but back to heart center. And we also have a website that you can just schedule a session straight through Um. If you're planning on working with me, I would recommend going through my website. Um. I do in person in Great Barrington. I have a beautiful office on railroad street, um, and then I do virtual sessions as well.

Chef James: 40:05

Okay, oh, okay, cool, that's good to know. And and and virtual Reiki too, which distance Reiki, which is actually highly effective Okay.

Olivia : 40:12

People, people don't use it that often, but it really works. I mean the people that I've had that have done it are like, wow, this is. I can't believe this works. And I still can't believe it works, and I'm a Reiki practitioner.

Chef James: 40:23

Well, there you go.

Olivia : 40:23

Well, so those people that are listening from across the US, and a few countries we have abroad, and I do, you know, I do clinical counseling work and I work with the nervous system and, and I do you know, I have a really big toolkit.

Chef James: 40:39

And I work with.

Olivia : 40:40

I work with a lot of different things. I work with PTSD. I work with, you know, I work with people in the food service industry, which is basically just like continuous PTSD. Um right. And I work with uh, I work with couples, I work with um, I work with young people. I work with I have a lot of college students right now.

Chef James: 40:58

Yeah, okay.

Olivia : 41:00

Who are? All of them are about to graduate, which is really exciting.

Chef James: 41:03

Oh, great Okay.

Olivia : 41:04

And yeah, I do a really wide range of work.

Chef James: 41:10

Okay, because I have a really big toolkit. Yeah, you do.

Olivia : 41:13

And really I just I love people.

Chef James: 41:16

Yep.

Olivia : 41:16

All people.

Chef James: 41:17

That's very clear. Yeah, absolutely.

Olivia : 41:19

You know I really people bring a really wide range of things to me and I'm always really grateful that they trust me with those things. You know, it's really. It's always an honor to be of service.

Chef James: 41:33

That's awesome.

Olivia : 41:34

Yeah.

Chef James: 41:34

For everyone out there. Take care of yourselves, because you deserve it. That's the most important For everyone out there.

Olivia : 41:39

Take care of yourselves because you deserve it. That's the most important. So, all right, thank you so much, it's been such a pleasure.

Chef James: 41:42

Yeah, all right, everyone. That is a wrap. You can check us out if you like that. Subscribe Also the Instagram Chef Massey. Let's keep it simple, chefmasseycom. Have a good one. Bye, for.