You're Not The Boss of Me - Week 1 Discussion - Emotions and Feelings

Does how we feel matter at all? What do we do with our emotions when they feel like they are controlling every part of lives? This week's discussion centers around how we can use the emotions we have to spur us on in spiritual growth as we take those thoughts and submit them to the word of God.

Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:18

Welcome to Navigate, a podcast discussion from Tower Life Center, where we talk about how to navigate life, living as a follower of Jesus in a fallen and ever-changing world. Let's join the discussion.

SPEAKER_03 0:30

Welcome in.

SPEAKER_04 0:32

Hey there, everybody.

SPEAKER_03 0:33

I actually don't know if I timed that right. Did I do that right? Yeah. Okay. It's good. We don't have Brad. We don't have Brad here. And so uh he's he's with the family today. And so uh we didn't even talk about who was gonna start. We were all we're kind of looking at each other.

SPEAKER_04 0:46

Yeah, and you you took the lead, so good job.

SPEAKER_03 0:49

I just said welcome and I hope I got at the right time.

SPEAKER_04 0:51

Yes.

unknown 0:52

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 0:53

Welcome in, everybody.

SPEAKER_03 0:54

We're glad to have you.

SPEAKER_04 0:55

Glad to be with you.

SPEAKER_03 0:56

We are glad and happy and excited and delighted. All the emotions. All the positive emotions. They're not the boss of us.

SPEAKER_04 1:06

That is right. We've all had some uh some lived-in experience this morning, haven't we, Zach?

SPEAKER_03 1:14

It's been some Monday.

SPEAKER_04 1:15

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03 1:16

We uh we're a little late recording because we about put Zach on his own personal podcast as he's ranting. Um so we are now ready to go and uh excited to to kind of chew through what we started talking about yesterday.

SPEAKER_01 1:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:31

Uh we kicked off a brand new series that we've called You're Not the Boss of Me. And uh Zach pointed out that the graphics to that, like like Buffalo Wild Wings. Dude. And so we're trying to get out of this as fast as possible so Zach and I can go discuss other things over half-price apps at lunch.

SPEAKER_04 1:48

Yes, they're gonna mandate a mandate.

SPEAKER_03 1:50

That's right. Mandate?

SPEAKER_04 1:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:52

A mandate. There you go. And so we're gonna, yeah. So we're thinking B dubs while we're talking about this. Uh but you're not the boss of me. The series that we started is uh this the series that we wanted to put together for the people of our church where we're really taking the truth of scripture and trying to apply it to these other things that live around us, right? Like these things that feel like they're controlling us, that feel like, man, when I wake up in the morning, this is the driving force behind how I make decisions, how I live in relationship, how I do whatever, right? Yeah. And so we said next week we're gonna talk about our past. The week after that, we're gonna talk about, man, the current circumstances that are going on around us, whether it's good or bad. But this week we were talking about our emotions and our feelings and making sure that those things don't become the boss of us.

SPEAKER_02 2:44

That never happens.

SPEAKER_03 2:44

Yeah, no, always under 100% control. Yeah. Totally in control. We uh the graphic for it is a big bear standing over a little human. Uh, and it says, You're not the boss of me. And and I think that our team did such a good job of putting that together because it does uh show how it feels sometimes. Whether it's our emotions and feelings, that's we'll talk about today, our past, whatever, right? Like it feels like, man, it's this big towering thing that's just about ready to devour me.

SPEAKER_04 3:14

Yeah, it's just a big looming cloud, and I don't want to touch it with a 10-foot pole.

SPEAKER_03 3:18

Right. But it's gonna touch me very quickly, right? Like it's gonna eat me and devour me. Yes. Uh, and so we talked about emotions and feelings yesterday and how those are things that while we can talk about our past and our current circumstances, which we will in the coming weeks, those are things that are outside of of of us, outside of our like they're they're around us, right? They're they're surrounding us. These emotions are inside us, yeah. Right? The feelings are in us, and we've got to figure out how do we um address them in a healthy in a spiritually healthy way and make sure that we navigate them in a way that would honor God and and call us to the life that He's asking us to live.

SPEAKER_04 4:01

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 4:02

Uh, and so what we did yesterday and we'll do again today is just look at uh some real basic research that will help us understand, man, why do emotions feel like they're the boss of me? So research would tell us that we are experiencing at least one emotion more than 90% of the time.

SPEAKER_04 4:21

That's a lot.

SPEAKER_03 4:21

I mean, think about it. If you're and if you're awake for 16 hours a day, right, like basically 15 hours of the 16, you're experiencing at least one emotion.

unknown 4:32

Right?

SPEAKER_03 4:32

Like apathy and emotion. Yeah, it sure is.

SPEAKER_02 4:36

It sure is. Take me to my nothing box. Right. What are you thinking about?

SPEAKER_04 4:40

Nothing.

SPEAKER_02 4:40

Nothing. I'm thinking about something.

SPEAKER_03 4:42

I just don't know what I'm thinking about.

SPEAKER_04 4:43

I want to be thinking about nothing. Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_03 4:45

Right. Yeah. Really often we have over 90% of the time we're at least have one emotion. Yeah. But then research would tell us that over one third of the time, so 35, 40% of the time, right? Whatever over one third would be, is we're experiencing mixed emotions. So more than one emotion, and by mixed, we mean both positive and negative. So I'm feeling anxious and excited. I'm feeling upset and encouraged. I'm you know what I'm like I'm feeling two different things, or at least two, but they are in conflict with one another. Yeah. And then the third stat we looked at was if we're intentional if we aren't intentional, uh the bot the research would say that 90 to 95% of our decisions and our behaviors are shaped non-consciously. So not on purpose, just by us non-consciously through our emotional brain system. So the feelings that we have, the good and the bad, the conflict, all of that, right? If we're not intentional about what we do with those feelings, then 90 to 95% of the decisions we make and the behaviors we have are um shaping or being shaped by those feelings, those emotions, right, and the emotional brain system that we have.

SPEAKER_04 6:06

Which I think is really, really important that we um remember this piece of it and that we focus on that because I mean 90 to 95% of our decisions and behaviors, that is our whole life.

SPEAKER_01 6:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 6:20

So literally, what lens are we making decisions through? What lens are we processing things through? What lens are we making our our big life decisions through? I mean, that's kind of sad that 90 to 95% of it is all emotionally led. That's scary. That's that should be alarming.

SPEAKER_02 6:36

Why do you think there's all of that crap right at the cash register?

SPEAKER_04 6:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 6:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 6:40

Right.

SPEAKER_02 6:41

That's an emotional impulse by. Impulse by.

SPEAKER_03 6:44

Did it weave you through this big long line of all of these impulse movies?

SPEAKER_02 6:48

Yeah, I don't want a candy bar unless it's right there where all I have to do is pick it up and scan it. Yeah. Maybe.

unknown 6:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 6:54

Yeah. And I think it would be really neat to start having conversation around this, like when we're in community and talking to one another, like, hey, that decision that you made. Um, what what emotion led that decision?

SPEAKER_01 7:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 7:05

And just like bringing awareness to it, not shaming people, not condemning people, but bringing awareness to it so that we can start uncovering and unmasking the emotion and getting down to like what where's the biblical root in your decision? Like, let's let's talk about that. So I I just really think this is gonna be really powerful and um help people walk in freedom. And um I just think it's really beneficial. So thank you for leading us in that, Kyle.

SPEAKER_02 7:31

Yeah, yeah. Well, you said yesterday you said how many times have you made something emotionally and felt good later about it? Yeah. Maybe you might have something that you did made an unemotional decision. It's like, well, that was a good idea. Yeah. More than likely.

SPEAKER_01 7:46

Right.

SPEAKER_02 7:47

I probably could have handled that. Yeah. Maybe not exactly like I did. I probably could have said this a little bit differently.

SPEAKER_04 7:53

A hundred percent.

SPEAKER_02 7:54

I think I've said this before. Like one of my grandfather's sayings was you can always say something tomorrow. If you say it today, you can't take it back. You can't take it back. You can't take it back. If you're angry at somebody and you say it off the cuff today or immediately, yeah, may not be exactly what you wanted to say. If you're still angry about it tomorrow, or you've had some time to think about a little better way to maybe say what you need to say. Right. Or deal with whatever the situation is you need to deal with. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 8:24

Can I get a do-over?

SPEAKER_02 8:25

Yeah. Yeah. No mulligans with emotions. No mulligans with emotions.

SPEAKER_03 8:31

That's funny. Yes. So when we look at all that research, then what what we can what we can basically take from that research is is a couple couple principles here. Number one is emotions are real. Right? Like, we can't pretend that they're not. We can't pretend we don't have them. We can't pretend that um it's just, oh, that's just a fake thing, right? Like, no, emotions are real. Yeah. Research would tell us that, the Bible tells us that, as we'll find out now. The other truth is that while they're real, they're tough to discern. So because I have mixed emotions, because I've got to figure out where do they come from, because they're conflicting with each other, because there's friction, because, because, because, right? Like, because of all of that, they're tough to discern.

SPEAKER_04 9:11

There's a lot of layers.

SPEAKER_03 9:12

Yep. And then when we don't discern them well or we can't discern them, and then we don't properly manage them, these decisions have the ability to shape our life. Right? Like we have to understand what's on the line. We have to understand that it's not just like, oh, that's a cute little thing. Yeah. It's like, no, this is the ability to shape our life if we don't discern it well and manage it properly. Right. And so that's what the research would tell us. And then so yesterday, kind of what we did was we we began to talk through um the the tension that we have to manage around um around emotions, around feelings, right? Because if they are real but they're tough to discern, that right there is a tension. Yeah. Right. And so we we began to break down kind of these tensions that we have to manage. Uh the we we said this way emotions are real, but they aren't reliable leaders. Yeah. Right? They are indicators of something deeper that must be identified and submitted to Christ.

SPEAKER_02 10:14

Being a father of two teenage daughters. This I Jennifer and I both kinda elbowed each other because there's times where like the the girls will just snap about something. It's like, where did that come from? Like what got you so riled up about I mean, and a lot of times it's something really small and not that critical. But for whatever reason, their emotional state got them heightened up. The answer is hormones. Yeah. Yeah, right. Tell me about it. Yeah, exactly. But yeah, I mean it's it's real, and you can see it. I mean, it's evident. It's not like a learned behavior, I don't feel like either. It's like, where did that come from?

SPEAKER_01 10:54

Right.

SPEAKER_03 10:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 10:55

Yeah. Yeah. They're real. Maybe you don't know. Yeah. That like that's one of the answers we get. I don't know why I'm upset about this.

SPEAKER_04 11:03

You don't know where this is coming from.

SPEAKER_02 11:04

I don't know where this is coming from. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 11:05

Yeah. And so it's it's while they're real, they're not reliable to lead, and so we've got to figure out okay, what are they indicating? What's the thing that's deeper that they're indicating?

SPEAKER_04 11:15

Right.

SPEAKER_03 11:16

Um and so what we did was we spent some time having some some conversation around the tensions that need managed, because managing those tensions are uh the way that we're going to begin to learn how do we navigate this well. Uh and so the number one tension that that I wanted to to kind of frame the whole uh idea of what are we trying to discuss is the tension between culture saying follow your heart and Jesus saying follow me, my ways, and my word.

unknown 11:48

Right.

SPEAKER_04 11:49

Two totally different things. Couldn't be more polar opposite.

SPEAKER_03 11:53

A hundred percent. A hundred percent, but it doesn't feel that way.

SPEAKER_04 11:57

Right.

SPEAKER_03 11:58

Right? Like what if you just say, hey man, follow your heart. That doesn't feel like that's anti-Jesus.

SPEAKER_04 12:03

Right.

SPEAKER_03 12:04

Anti-the-ways of Jesus, anti-the Bible, right?

SPEAKER_04 12:06

Unless you know the scripture.

SPEAKER_03 12:08

Because the scripture is Jeremiah 17, 9, which says the heart is deceitful above all things and desperately sick. Who can understand it? Right? And when we begin to think about our emotions, when we begin to think about our feelings, those are coming not just from our brain. That's not just a logical thing to your point. I don't know why I'm angry. I don't know why. Like I one of my favorite pieces of information I've ever um I've ever seen, at least pertaining to this, was was I said it at the end of service yesterday, but I'll use it now. Is Neuroanatomist Dr. Jill Bolt Taylor, whoever she is, thank you for this research. And whatever that I'm sure you're listening because we have so many listeners, I'm sure we're whatever that field is. Yeah, right. I don't even know if I said your title right. Um but she but her research would tell you that the chemicals that cause emotions in our body, they wash through our body in roughly 90 seconds. So if an emotion lasts longer than 90 seconds, it's because we're choosing to remain in that emotional state. Think about that.

SPEAKER_04 13:12

Yeah, that's wild. It's a choice. Truly as a choice.

SPEAKER_03 13:16

Like, think about the times that we're still upset about something after 90 seconds. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 13:21

Yeah. That's kind of true. Like, how many times, how many times have you like seen somebody that you like 90 seconds has gone by? I'm not really thinking about that, or I'm not mad about that anymore. But when I see them, I'm like, I'm still supposed to be mad at them.

SPEAKER_04 13:33

Yeah, I'm still mad. Yeah, right, right.

SPEAKER_02 13:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 13:36

And it's it's crazy it's a choice. Yeah, yeah. We're making a choice.

SPEAKER_04 13:45

All day long. Maybe two days, maybe a week. Like, how many of those things are we actually are going through?

SPEAKER_03 13:52

That could be crippling. Yes. Right. That that's my point. Is my point is many people listening are like, no, Dr. Jill Bolt Taylor has no idea what she's talking about. And if science is accurate in that, then when you are ticked off, when you're anxious, when you're whatever, right, for days on end.

SPEAKER_04 14:11

Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_03 14:12

Or for more than 90 seconds, but let's just say, man, it's been like two or three days, right? You're choosing to remain in that state. And why? Well, because you're being deceived by the heart.

SPEAKER_04 14:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 14:22

The the piece that where you have this tension of follow the heart or follow Jesus, his ways and his words, right? Like the word, the Bible is Jesus. Right. And so Jesus is in direct competition. He is in direct opposition, is a better way to say it, with what culture would say, follow your heart. Jesus is like, no, whatever you do, don't follow your heart.

SPEAKER_04 14:45

Right, right. 100%. And you just think about um if you sit in that emotion, you continue to let it ruminate, you're creating neural pathways, not to get nerdy on everybody, but you are literally creating these negative neural pathways that your brain can then just get into these ruts, and you just stay in this rut of anger, this rut of bitterness, this rut of insecurity, this rut of doubt, this rut of uh addiction, this rut of whatever it might be, whatever emotion it is that you're struggling with. Um, you're creating these ruts. And the way to scientifically and biblically get out of that rut is to find the scripture that, which we'll talk about this in a little bit, but to find the scripture and submit that in that moment, um, the second that you can identify the emotion rather than sitting in it for weeks on end.

SPEAKER_03 15:33

For sure. Yeah. And so we have to begin this process of saying, All right, I'm not gonna follow my heart. I'm gonna follow the ways of Jesus and the words of Jesus and what the Bible says. Right. And so to Amana's point, practically we'll talk about that here in a second. But I want us to see that this concept of of having emotions, like having emotions aren't the problem. They are inevitable. The Bible talks about it, and in fact, the Bible encourages us to have emotions, right? It's uh what is it? Romans 12, 15. Says, rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. Now, rejoice isn't an emotion, that's an action you take from an emotion, right? And so rejoice is that, right? But then weep, that would be the negative emotion. Nobody's gonna argue that we should rejoice. But should we weep? Yeah. Well, weep is gonna come from sadness, it's gonna come from compassion, it's gonna come from grief, it's gonna come from whatever it is, right? And but the Bible's saying, go like go for it, do it.

SPEAKER_02 16:33

Yeah, shortest, shortest verse in the Bible Jesus loved.

SPEAKER_03 16:37

Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And then there's the verse that we talked about yesterday that you came in reciting this morning, which was Be angry, don't sin.

SPEAKER_04 16:51

Multiple times, over and over again. Be angry, do not sin. Right.

SPEAKER_03 16:54

But I want you to see he he doesn't say if you have to, it's okay to be angry. It says be angry.

SPEAKER_00 17:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 17:02

Right? Like I think Jesus probably had a little bit of righteous anger when he was flipping tables. Yeah. Right? But but don't sin.

SPEAKER_04 17:10

Don't sin in your anger. Right.

SPEAKER_03 17:11

So don't hear me men listening to say, well, there's my affirmation to go be ticked off all the time. That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying he says be angry, but don't sin.

SPEAKER_04 17:21

Women too. Men aren't the only ones that struggle with anger.

SPEAKER_03 17:24

For sure.

SPEAKER_04 17:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 17:25

For sure. But oftentimes when when in the line of work that I have, uh-huh, when I'm talking to people, it's oftentimes or as a husband, I can't say women.

SPEAKER_01 17:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 17:37

Wife, yeah, deal with your anger. Listen, ladies, don't be so ticked off so easy.

SPEAKER_04 17:42

Yeah, that's true.

SPEAKER_03 17:44

Okay, so what I want us to understand is the problem isn't the emotion that we feel as much as the action we take once we feel the emotion. Right? I'm not anti-emotion.

SPEAKER_04 17:55

Right.

SPEAKER_03 17:56

I'm anti-sin. I'm not anti-emotion. I'm anti-the-emotion being the boss of us.

SPEAKER_04 18:02

Right. Right, like anti-temotion leading.

SPEAKER_03 18:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 18:06

Right.

SPEAKER_03 18:06

And that's what we have to begin to uh grow through. And so uh we have a couple different ways of of talking about emotions to help us reframe them so that we can reframe them in a way that uh allows us to begin to then deal with them.

SPEAKER_04 18:22

Yeah, it creates a new perspective around emotion.

SPEAKER_03 18:25

Yes. So emotions are indicators, not dictators. Right? So if emotions are real, then they can indicate something, they just shouldn't dictate our lives.

SPEAKER_04 18:35

Yes, and they're not justifiers. They're not dictators or justifiers.

SPEAKER_03 18:38

Right.

SPEAKER_04 18:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 18:39

Right. And so think of the dashboard on your car.

SPEAKER_04 18:42

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 18:43

Right? When a light comes on, it's indicating something. Right? It doesn't control the car, it doesn't take over the car.

SPEAKER_04 18:51

It doesn't tell the car where to go.

SPEAKER_03 18:52

It does yep, it doesn't redirect the car.

SPEAKER_04 18:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 18:55

It doesn't tell you that you're not allowed to drive the car. Right? It just says, listen, you should check the tire pressure.

SPEAKER_04 19:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 19:02

Or something else that would happen on a dashboard. Yeah. Right?

SPEAKER_04 19:05

Like And if you don't, there's consequences. Like you could have a blowout driving 70 miles an hour down the highway.

SPEAKER_03 19:11

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 19:11

And that brings all sorts of heartache and grief.

SPEAKER_03 19:16

Yeah, all sorts of challenge, right? Like so they're indicators of something, they're just not dictators.

SPEAKER_04 19:21

Right.

SPEAKER_03 19:22

And many of us are living as though our emotions are dictators. They control us. They're the bear that's about to eat us. They're they're I can't have a healthy relationship. I can't have this. I can't enjoy my job. I can't enjoy my truly a stronghold. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 19:42

Emotions are a stronghold.

SPEAKER_03 19:44

Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_04 19:46

And we allow it to be subconsciously. Like you said earlier. We we don't even recognize that we are allowing this stronghold in our life.

SPEAKER_03 19:53

Yes. Yep. Yeah. And so we have to understand while they're not bad, what do we do with them, right? So indicators, not dictators. Another way we said it was emotions make terrible masters, but powerful messengers. Right? Same same discussion, different words. Yep. Right? Like we don't want them to be the master of us, but man, we do want them to give us messages because to your point, if they what message they articulate is something that we need to address and deal with, right? If we have low tire pressure, we better fill it up.

SPEAKER_04 20:26

Yeah. And like with your car, it gives you a message. You choose, am I going to receive said message or am I going to deny said message? If I deny said message, well, you're going to have that blowout on uh 69, you know. Or or go ahead.

SPEAKER_03 20:41

Well, or sometimes you just have to turn your car off, turn it back on, and the tire pressure thing goes away. And it's like, okay, that message wasn't that big of a deal. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:49

Sure. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 20:49

You know, like sometimes you just need a reset.

SPEAKER_04 20:51

A reset, or you have to actually receive the message.

SPEAKER_03 20:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:55

And say, okay, I'm going to partner with God in receiving this message and I'm going to do the work.

SPEAKER_02 20:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:00

So there's a few different avenues that you can go with that one.

SPEAKER_02 21:02

Yeah. I thought about you know, people that say, Oh, super stressful day today. I gotta go home and have a couple drinks.

SPEAKER_04 21:10

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:11

Like that's letting the emotion lead. Lead. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:14

What it's a very action is. Yeah. For sure.

SPEAKER_02 21:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:18

They're not saying, Hey, I had a really stressful day. I'm going to go home and sit down with my wife and read our Bible together. I'm not going to go home and sit down with my wife and prayer, you know?

SPEAKER_02 21:27

Or sit down and have some alone time.

SPEAKER_04 21:30

Or alone time. Yes. And calm down instead of or I'm going to listen to worship music on the way home.

SPEAKER_02 21:34

What are you using to what's the other stronghold that's tied to that emotional stronghold? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 21:40

If it's a message, you have to respond.

SPEAKER_01 21:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 21:43

If it indicates something, you have to deal with it, right? And that's what we're gonna talk about at the end.

SPEAKER_01 21:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 21:47

So to you guys this point, how am I dealing with it?

SPEAKER_01 21:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 21:49

Am I dealing it with a bottle of wine? Am I dealing it with a vape pen? Am I dealing it with pornography? Am I dealing with poker night with the boys every night?

SPEAKER_01 21:56

Like, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 21:57

How am I dealing with it?

SPEAKER_04 21:59

Yeah. Or

SPEAKER_03 22:00

Or am I going to deal with it by communicating effectively? Am I going to deal with it through prayer? Am I going to deal with it through worship music?

SPEAKER_04 22:05

It doesn't even have to be bad things. Like you could be, am I dealing with it out on the golf course? Like, am I just spending all my time out on the golf course? Or am I just running away to a vacation or a lake? Or not that those things are bad, but yes, how am I how am I dealing with it?

SPEAKER_02 22:18

Yeah. All I heard was golf course is not bad.

SPEAKER_03 22:22

That was my takeaway. Maybe after our working lunch, we can go have a working afternoon later. Yeah, y'all.

SPEAKER_04 22:29

It's all about the heart behind it. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 22:31

We're working. We are working. It's true. Um, okay. The last way we kind of said it was emotions reveal what's happening inside us. They do not reveal what's true about God's word and how we should handle our emotions. Right? So be angry, don't sin. Right? Doesn't say be angry and so treat people terribly. Fly off the handle.

SPEAKER_01 22:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 22:58

Yeah, so pick up the table and beat someone with it.

SPEAKER_01 23:01

Right?

SPEAKER_03 23:01

Like, you know what it's not that's not what it says. No. It says be angry, don't sin.

SPEAKER_04 23:09

Or like I'm fearful. Okay, well, the Bible tells us do not fear over three hundred and sixty-five times. You know?

SPEAKER_01 23:16

Right.

SPEAKER_04 23:16

Do not be afraid. Do not fear. There is there's reason behind that. He doesn't want you to live in fear.

SPEAKER_02 23:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 23:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 23:22

That's where that image that you use for for the series, you know, the bear towering over. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 23:29

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 23:30

There's so much imagery and all that. Fear could be one of them. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 23:33

For sure. I think fear is a big one. And the question we have to say is okay, can I stop myself from ever being afraid? No. I don't think we can.

SPEAKER_04 23:44

Yeah, and just to clarify, I think we have to like name even what is inside fear because fear isn't just like I'm a child and I'm afraid of the boogeyman. I'm afraid of the dark. Fear is I'm afraid of how this life could hurt me. I'm afraid of how these people could view me. I'm afraid of how health is going to take over my family's life, good or bad. You know, like fear comes in all different packages. And I think that we have to be able to name it for that so that we can actually start addressing it.

SPEAKER_02 24:18

Well, it's fruits of the spirit overcoming the bad emotion. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 24:23

Right.

SPEAKER_02 24:24

You know, take that take that verse. Be angry, don't sin. Well, okay. Be fearful, but don't sin.

SPEAKER_04 24:32

Right.

SPEAKER_02 24:33

You know, be frustrated, but don't sin.

SPEAKER_04 24:35

Yeah, it's not putting any emotion in that Bible verse.

SPEAKER_03 24:38

Right. And so we have to we what we do have to manage attention to you guys like Amanda, you brought up the Bible says don't fear. It doesn't say don't be angry. Right. So there's a difference.

SPEAKER_01 24:49

Sure.

SPEAKER_03 24:49

And I think we have to be willing to. So then that's where I said, like, can we ever not experience being afraid, even as adults? Right? Like, Zach, you you want to come in and you want to scare us every every every Monday morning. You want to sneak up to boot. It's not like I was like, ah, oh shoot, I sinned because I was scared. Right? But if I live my life saying I can't walk around any corner without wondering, is someone gonna scare me? And I'm just living in this crippling fear. Yeah. That is the difference between saying, Oh, I was afraid and I am living in fear.

SPEAKER_04 25:28

That is really interesting. I've never thought about that before with the difference between anger and fear. He doesn't tell us don't be angry, but he does tell us so many times in the Bible, do not fear.

SPEAKER_03 25:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 25:40

Wow.

unknown 25:40

Huh.

SPEAKER_03 25:41

But he says But he says, be angry, but don't sin.

SPEAKER_04 25:44

Correct.

SPEAKER_03 25:45

And he says, don't fear. So the question is, is fear sinful? Right? And I'm not saying if you're listening, I'm not sitting here saying that you're sinning because you're navigating fear. I'm also not saying that you're not.

SPEAKER_04 26:00

Well, he tells us not to fear for the betterment of our spirit and our soul and our heart.

SPEAKER_03 26:05

Well, he says we weren't given a spirit of fear. Yeah. But we were given a spirit of power, love, and sound mind.

SPEAKER_01 26:10

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 26:10

Right? And so we have to understand that that there is a um another tension to be managed between the Holy Spirit, though spirit of power, love, and sound mind, and a spirit of fear. Right. And so I'm not saying you can't be afraid. I'm not saying you shouldn't have wisdom. I'm not saying you shouldn't be cautious. But if you constantly are living in fear of what could happen.

SPEAKER_04 26:35

Yeah. Well, and fear that just goes back to the heart as deceptive because fear leads you into all the other emotions, into doubt, into insecurity, into questioning everything, into I mean, yeah. It it literally is crippling. It leads you into so many things. Sorry, we got out of fear tangent.

SPEAKER_03 26:53

That's great. And so, but so as we talk about a spirit of fear, as we talk about this being something that is probably more than just, oh, I was afraid. Right? We where we kind of went yesterday was uh 2 Corinthians chapter 10 verses 3 through 5, and we took a little detour to help us understand where do our emotions and feelings, where does the deceitful heart in all of us come from? Right? And so 2 Corinthians chapter 10, verse 3 through 5, Paul says, For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh. For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but they have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and we take every thought captive to obey Christ. When we talk about emotions, when we talk about feelings, when we talk about our thought life, right, when you talk about being fearful, when we talk about just being angry all the time. Listen, be angry, but you get 90 seconds. It's not like live angry. Yeah. Yeah. You know, like you get 90 seconds, and then after that, you're choosing to be angry, which may be where you then enter into the sinful part of it.

SPEAKER_04 28:03

Well, it's like you get 90 seconds to choose. Am I gonna sin or am I gonna obey Christ?

SPEAKER_03 28:07

Right. And so we take every thought captive, right? That would be the that's like the the command that every Christian would say when you talk about emotions and thoughts and all that. Well, just take it all captive and make it obey Christ. Well, what we did yesterday was we we went through the exercise of understanding why we would do that. Right? Why do we have to do something so um aggressive, right? So so much that feels like warfare. Right? Well, because we have to understand, and the way I said it yesterday is that you're not up against the thing that you think you're up against. Right? So the thing that gives you the anger, the anxiety, the fear, the um worry, the joy, the elation, the excitement, the happiness, the whatever you're not up against that as you're fighting these emotions and feelings. Right? So I'm gonna read the same list today that I read yesterday because I think it's helpful for people to hear. Right? You're not up against a husband who's being a fool right now, you're not up against a wife who doesn't appreciate and respect you. You're not up against a boss who takes advantage of you, you're not up against a group of friends who are excluding you, you're not up against an addiction, you're not up against a sexual sin. You're not up against your family, you're not up against a political party or ideology. You are not up against anxiety, fear, control, depression, sadness, loneliness, isolation, divorce, lust, immorality, alcoholism, or workaholism, or something else that I did not put on there.

SPEAKER_04 29:33

Yeah. It's so powerful.

SPEAKER_03 29:35

Right, like you that's not what you're up against.

SPEAKER_04 29:37

Right.

SPEAKER_03 29:38

You that might look like it, but that's the fleshly battle that we want to fight. But he says, listen, you're not fighting the fleshly battle.

SPEAKER_04 29:44

You're also not victim to any of those things.

SPEAKER_03 29:46

Right. But they do, to your point from earlier, appear as strongholds. Right? Well, where do strongholds come from? Well, what we're finding out yesterday is so our heart's deceitful, our emotions can lie to us, they are indicators, they do have messages, but we do need to dig through them. Where does all of this come from? Well, it comes from a war that is happening around us in the spiritual realm. In the spiritual realm between God and Satan, between the flesh, which would be Satan, and the spirit, which is God. Right? And so then we have to say, okay, if we're up against a spiritual enemy, who is that? Well, if it's the devil, then what are his what's the devil's tactics, right? How is he going to attack us through our emotions and through our feelings?

SPEAKER_04 30:30

Yeah. What's his playbook?

unknown 30:31

Lie.

SPEAKER_03 30:32

Lie. Right. Lies.

SPEAKER_04 30:33

Lie or Wells His native tongue.

SPEAKER_03 30:34

That's what he speaks. He's an accuser, he lies, but that's how. Before we can even talk about how, we have to talk about what his goal is.

SPEAKER_01 30:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 30:42

Right? His goal is to devour us. Right? Or as Jesus said, he's a thief who comes to steal and kill and destroy. Yeah. Right. First.

SPEAKER_04 30:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 30:54

Yeah. Right. A hundred percent.

SPEAKER_04 30:56

John 10 10.

SPEAKER_03 30:57

John 10 10 is the thief who comes to steal, kill, and destroy, that's Satan. First Peter 5 8 says, listen, be sober-minded, be watchful. Your enemy, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Right? And so if it's a spiritual battle versus spiritual enemy and it's not about all those things we just said, then if I'm angry and I'm sinning, if I'm worrying, if I'm anxious, if I'm fearful, if I'm insecure, if I'm feeling whatever the emotion is, and I'm like, well, if my husband just got his act together, if my wife just would figure that out, if our kids would stop being so whatever, if they would start this, right? If that friend group would if that person at work, if if, if, right? Yeah. Because I'm I'm only angry because of that. I'm only sad because of that.

SPEAKER_04 31:47

Yeah, in our minds, we give way too much credit to the emotion and to the problem and to the other person and to the enemy.

SPEAKER_01 31:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 31:56

We give way too much credit to him when really we need to be looking at it as, wow, I'm fighting from a stance of victory. Like my God has already overcome our God. My God has already overcome all of these things. So that should give us a different perspective when we're entering into this spiritual war zone.

SPEAKER_03 32:14

Yeah. And we want to justify our emotion on someone else's actions.

unknown 32:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 32:19

So back to the we want to place blame on somebody else.

SPEAKER_03 32:23

Yep. And so Which is the pride part. 100% right. And so as we have these emotions and these feelings. It can't be me. Yeah, of course it's not me.

SPEAKER_04 32:31

It's never me.

SPEAKER_03 32:32

Right?

SPEAKER_04 32:32

You good?

SPEAKER_03 32:34

And so we have these emotions. We have these feelings. Right. And they're symptoms of something deeper.

SPEAKER_01 32:44

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 32:45

We have to figure out where does all of that come from. And then we see all of a sudden that it's really not about, well, I'm just an angry person. I'm not just a fearful person.

SPEAKER_04 32:55

That's not your identity.

SPEAKER_03 32:56

I'm not just an anxious person. No. It's no. We have an enemy who's going to lie to us, who's going to accuse us, as we were just saying, because he wants to kill us, steal from us, destroy us, devour us.

SPEAKER_04 33:06

And just like the uh car light and the message that we're receiving, so we can receive the message from the emotion, but we also have to understand the message that the enemy is trying to speak over us to capture us with, to destroy us with.

SPEAKER_01 33:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 33:21

And understand that like we can receive that message, but then it's our responsibility as Christians to fight it with truth.

SPEAKER_03 33:28

Yeah. Well, it's you we have to begin to think of this war that we're in as a spiritual war, but he's gonna fight us through the spirit with what I would call emotional and mental warfare.

SPEAKER_04 33:42

Yeah. Emotional and warfare arrows. Like he's throwing arrows, and sometimes we're unarmed.

SPEAKER_03 33:48

He's not trying to like physically kill you. He's trying to spiritually kill you through emotional arrows and mental arrows and bullets that feel like they're coming and relational things, right? But it all pertains to our emotions and our mental state. That's how he fight.

SPEAKER_04 34:05

I just envision us sitting in like an open field and he's just throwing these darts and these arrows at us. And it's like we're just sitting there like zoom, zoom, watching these things go by, just like passively. And how many times do we need to armor up, pick up our armor and understand like we are in a fight? We are we are warriors, we are in a battle all the time. We need to keep our armor on all the time. Armor of God, you know? And how often, myself included, have I sat there in that open field just saying, shoot me, here we go. Let's go, you know.

SPEAKER_03 34:42

You but your intention isn't to say shoot me. No, it's not I am just not prepared to navigate this. I'm not equipped to fight this battle.

SPEAKER_01 34:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 34:51

We have we have something ringing from somewhere we've got taken care of.

SPEAKER_01 34:55

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 34:56

Listen, here's the deal. As we talk about all of this, here's the other thing that I don't want to talk about before we talk about how do we navigate effectively this. Um what can we practically do? We're we're gonna spend the last few minutes on that. But there's something that that I don't want to say. Some of us have learned that our dashboard is going to notify us of things. We have no idea what to do with the information it gives us. So our tire light comes on, and instead of saying, hey, let's pump it up real quick because we have one tire that needs pumped up, we're saying I'm not a mechanic. No, we're gonna say, let's go get all four new tires. We're overreacting. Oh. We get a message that feels like, hey, this I need to address this.

SPEAKER_01 35:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 35:41

Right? So I I feel a little worked up by that comment that friend made. Now I'm gonna fly off the handle. I'm gonna think, well, they they hate me, they this, man. I'm so sad because I just lost another friend because the friend was like, hey, that night doesn't work. We're gonna have to look at our calendar and find a different night. You're like, Well, there's another person who hates me.

SPEAKER_04 36:00

Everybody always does this to me. I'm your right.

SPEAKER_03 36:03

And so we get this, we get when you get your notification on your dashboard, we have to understand what it's saying. Like, we have to begin to ask some questions. Yeah, we can't overreact and say, Well, my tire pressure light came on, so let's get all new tires.

SPEAKER_04 36:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 36:18

Sometime you might have to.

SPEAKER_04 36:19

I've never seen a car that made a bit you might just need a pad.

SPEAKER_03 36:22

Right.

SPEAKER_04 36:23

And the tire.

SPEAKER_03 36:23

Sometime you just need to put the little thing on and pump at four psi and the light goes away. Right.

SPEAKER_04 36:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 36:29

Right? That not sometimes you need four psi and you're putting on four new tires.

SPEAKER_04 36:35

Right, right.

SPEAKER_03 36:35

And it's an overreaction and it's exhausting.

SPEAKER_04 36:38

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 36:38

Because it's the boss of you. Right? It's the same thing as, you know, in the summer when you turn on your car and it tells you you're like, man, it's kind of hot outside. And then it's like, it's 112 degrees.

SPEAKER_01 36:49

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_03 36:49

You're like, how's how's it 112 degrees?

SPEAKER_01 36:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 36:52

You have to also understand that your car may give you so your mental and emotional brain system may give you some faulty messages.

SPEAKER_04 37:00

An overheated reaction. Yep.

SPEAKER_03 37:02

And so you've got to give it time to cool down. To cool down a bit. Oh, no, no, no. Okay. It's only 88 degrees.

SPEAKER_04 37:07

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 37:08

That feels more like it, but it said 112 when I turned it on. Some of us need to just be like, hey, hang on.

SPEAKER_04 37:14

Yeah. Take a deep breath.

SPEAKER_03 37:15

Let me take some time and figure out what is my emotional brain system telling me.

SPEAKER_04 37:20

Which, as Christians, we can take a deep breath. We can go to God in prayer. We can sit in worship. We can sit in solitude. Those are ways to help the car cool down.

SPEAKER_03 37:29

Yes. For sure. So now, what do we do practically? Like what can I practically do to say, all right, if I don't want my emotions, I don't want my feelings being the boss of me anymore. What's the practical thing that I'm supposed to do? So we outline four things, and these things are uh in my opinion, uh a non-negotiable order of things. You can't if you get them out of order, it's not gonna be as effective. Right? The first thing we have to do is name it. So what am I feeling? Right? We have to begin to be able to say, hey, I'm feeling X, I'm feeling Y, I'm feeling Z.

SPEAKER_04 38:08

And when you're naming it, I would encourage you to sit down with a journal and write out the emotion and name it with you and God. And then you can take it to your spouse. Then you can take it to a friend, a trusted friend. Then you can, you know, take it to your community group. But make sure you also have that order proper and correct that you need to go to God first before you're going to your spouse and unloading and because your spouse may not be equipped to necessarily lead you through that just yet either. And you need to go to God first to get his leadership on it.

SPEAKER_03 38:48

Yeah, for sure. If you won't let God lead you through it, you certainly won't let your spouse or a friend or anybody else.

SPEAKER_04 38:54

Right.

SPEAKER_03 38:56

You might think you are, but eventually you're gonna be like, nah, they don't know what they're talking about.

SPEAKER_04 38:59

And I know it's a lot easier to go straight to the spouse or to go straight to the friend or straight to a family member because you get that immediate gratification, you get that immediate response. And I understand that. Um, I've done that too, and I still do that. But we have to go to God first and allow him to prepare our hearts to to walk through this.

SPEAKER_03 39:21

I only think it I only think that we think it's easier because we're going to place blame not to communicate emotion. I'm not going to tell you I'm angry.

SPEAKER_02 39:30

I'm going to tell you I'm angry because you're an idiot. Or I'm going to go to somebody that I trust that's going to tell me what I want to hear. Sure.

SPEAKER_04 39:36

Yes, that's going to affirm the emotion. Right.

SPEAKER_03 39:37

So you're going you're looking for affirmation from someone who you're not mad at, or if you go communicate to the person you're mad at or fearful or whatever, right? Right. You you're doing that because you're you you're justifying it by transitioning the blame of that emotion onto that person.

SPEAKER_04 39:53

And you're only going to talk about it with the friends that would affirm that said emotion. You're not going to go to somebody that's like, hey, you're kind of out of line here. Yeah. Hey, have you thought about this? Hey, do you know where this emotion's coming from?

SPEAKER_02 40:03

That's that's back to the follow your heart, not follow Jesus. 100%.

SPEAKER_04 40:07

Which it just continues to double down. Right. Double down, double down.

SPEAKER_03 40:10

Yes.

SPEAKER_04 40:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 40:12

Okay. So name it. Now we have to the second thing we said was trace it, which means what is this pointing to? Right? So like I've got to name it. But I can't just be like, yeah, that's what I thought. I thought I was fearful. Okay. Awesome. Good job, step one. Now what do I do with that? Why? Why am I fearful? Well, because I experienced this growing up and because of that, and because of this, and and what would happen if.

SPEAKER_04 40:41

And you sort of just again just like start journaling through that. Ask yourself why, what, who, when, where. Like start asking yourself those like layered questions that will take you back to the root of when you first experience this feeling.

SPEAKER_02 40:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 40:56

So that you can bring that before the Lord and He can help you heal it.

SPEAKER_02 40:59

Yeah, part of it could be, and you talked about it yesterday. Was it Nicole that said two weeks ago the lie? Yes. What's the lie you're trying or what's the lie you're believing?

SPEAKER_04 41:10

In every season.

SPEAKER_02 41:11

Yeah. Like I Yeah. I elbowed Jennifer. Like, have you ever been in a conversation with somebody where you didn't say anything other than maybe a few words, but they heard something completely different.

SPEAKER_01 41:24

Like, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 41:25

We've had that discussion before. She's like, Well, that's what you were saying. I was like, I didn't say any of that. Sure. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:30

Sure.

SPEAKER_02 41:30

I didn't it's like no.

SPEAKER_03 41:31

It's like you and I getting the fact that we should go golfing at that earlier.

unknown 41:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 41:36

No, I didn't say any of that. Right. You assumed I was going to say, or you thought I was going to say that. That's not what I was thinking at all. And I didn't say any of that.

SPEAKER_04 41:44

And I think that's so common between husband and wives, especially. And it's the way that the enemy likes to get in and try to divide. I mean, it happens with us too. And it's just like, wow, if we could just pause, stop right here. Let's identify the lie that we're one of us or both of us are believing, and then get back on the same page of unity.

SPEAKER_03 42:04

Yeah. It's common 100% in husbands and wives, but it's common in any relationship where there is relational friction and a conflict or and a resolution is desire.

SPEAKER_00 42:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 42:16

Right? It's easy if I don't desire a resolution, just be like, man, that person is crazy. But with kids, with someone at work, with a friend, with the community, like you have to begin to just like you said, is okay, now we have to work begin to work through it. And it's like, hang on. I don't think I said that. Yeah. If I did, that's not what I meant. Right. I don't think that why would you even assume that I would say that?

SPEAKER_04 42:42

Yeah. And then it goes back to conflict management, which is a whole other discussion. But it's not about who's right and who's wrong. You're fighting for unity. So make sure you remember what you're fighting for. No, not what you're fighting against.

SPEAKER_03 42:54

Because you're not fighting your spouse, you're not fighting that person, you're not fighting your kid, you're not fighting, you're not fighting you're fighting Satan, that's it.

SPEAKER_01 43:00

Yep.

SPEAKER_03 43:01

And he's gonna make you want to fight your spouse or your kid or that person at work or your boss or your friend or your community. Yeah. Yeah. Because Yeah, because why wouldn't he? He just wants to not be the one who's fighting. Yeah. He's like the antagonistic friend who never fights, but is always stirring the pot.

SPEAKER_04 43:18

Well, the more that we're fighting, the more our focus is taken off of worshiping God.

SPEAKER_03 43:21

Right.

SPEAKER_04 43:22

And that's what he wants. He wants us distracted. He wants to pull us away. He wants he wants the worship. And in those moments we choose, are we gonna who are we gonna give our worship to?

SPEAKER_03 43:34

Yeah. Well segue into submit it.

SPEAKER_01 43:39

That's right.

SPEAKER_03 43:39

Is that what you were thinking? Yep.

SPEAKER_01 43:41

Yep.

SPEAKER_03 43:42

Great minds. Okay, so name it, trace it, submit it. So now this is saying, Jesus, are you Lord over it? Right? So I've named it. I've begun the process of tracing it. Now when I feel angry the next time, am I gonna sin? Or am I gonna sit there and do exactly the same? Morning of be angry, don't sin. Be angry, don't sin, be angry, don't sin. Next time I feel verbally. Next time I feel fearful, am I gonna say, hey, the Bible says do not fear, do not fear, do not fear. I wasn't given a spirit of fear. Instead, I was given a spirit of power, love, and sound mind. Yeah, the Bible says, cast all my worries on him. The Bible says, instead of being anxious, pray.

SPEAKER_01 44:18

Yes, right?

SPEAKER_03 44:19

Like, so all of these things, like, am I willing to say, I'm going to do that instead? Which really I'm blending submit it with the last one, which is replace it. Right. So as I submit it to the Lordship of Jesus, then I have to do what Amanda probably said 30 minutes ago or however long ago was.

SPEAKER_04 44:36

I jumped ahead, sir. No, you're fine.

SPEAKER_03 44:38

Which is which is replace it. So now I've got to find the truth that is over the accusation or the lie or the thing that I'm believing. So, okay, I feel angry. The Bible says be angry, but don't sin. Okay, I feel afraid. The Bible says don't be afraid. I wasn't given a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind. I want to fight my spouse, I want to fight my kid, and I don't mean fight him like physically. Just like I'm right, they're wrong, they need to know it. Right. Well, hang on. The Bible says that we're not in the battle of flesh and blood, but a spiritual battle. And we're actually designed to, as we do this, to defeat the strongholds and destroy the argument.

SPEAKER_04 45:19

And the Bible also tells us to practice gratitude and to enter in with praise and worship and thanksgiving. And so those are instructions too to help keep us away and lessen these emotional train wrecks.

SPEAKER_03 45:33

Sure. So I feel discontent. The Bible says that godliness with contentment is great gain, so I'm gonna start being grateful.

SPEAKER_04 45:40

Right. I'm gonna start practicing gratitude every morning and every night before I go to bed. And all throughout the day, I'm gonna find things that I can be grateful for and thankful for rather than the things I don't have.

SPEAKER_03 45:51

Yeah. Right. Um yeah. I mean, we could do this all day. So find the emotion and the feeling that is it could be a good one. It could be, man, I'm just the pursuit of happiness. I want happy, happy, happy, happy, happy. Right.

SPEAKER_04 46:06

What defines happy.

SPEAKER_03 46:07

Yeah, and it's like, hang on, the Bible says that I should choose joy.

SPEAKER_04 46:11

The joy of the Lord.

SPEAKER_03 46:12

Because I'm making a decision for joy that comes only from the Lord, not from a promotion, not from a new car, not from a boat, not from a trip, not from my kid making the whatever team.

SPEAKER_04 46:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 46:23

Not from circumstances around me.

SPEAKER_04 46:25

Mm-hmm. But then you also have the emotional need for safety, security, comfort. Those are really big ones too.

SPEAKER_03 46:32

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 46:32

Um, and we can mask that with saying, I just want peace. And it's like, well, hold on, how does the Lord define peace? Where does the peace come from? Because I can promise it doesn't come from this world. It doesn't go from the world.

SPEAKER_03 46:45

The Holy Spirit is the spirit of peace. He brings us a the peace that surpasses all understanding. Right. Like peace is a fruit of the spirit.

SPEAKER_04 46:52

With the peace that surpasses all understanding, we have to give up our right to understand, which is so hard.

SPEAKER_03 46:58

Yeah, because that's control.

SPEAKER_04 46:59

Yes, one hundred percent. So all this to say there are so many emotions, there are so many layers to this, and this is why we can always go back to community, is so important. Yes, you have to process this with the Lord, but you also have to have Christian community around you that's sharpening you, that is having these conversations with you, that is able to that are able to speak into this and help you um navigate the the lights on your dashboard.

SPEAKER_03 47:27

Yeah, you need someone who is I've said this before and I I'm sure I'll use it again. Is as my dad says, you need someone who's gonna pat you on the back and kick you in the butt at the same time.

SPEAKER_04 47:36

Yes, right, that you receive that from that you that you know loves you and wants the best for you at the end of the day.

SPEAKER_03 47:42

So they're gonna tell you take every thought captive, dude.

SPEAKER_04 47:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 47:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 47:45

Like And this can be, yes, it can be somebody a few seasons ahead of you, but it can also be the people that are in the same season of life. And I think that's where we have to lay down the pride, the ego, the offense, yeah, um, all of those things that might kick up if if there is somebody trying to speak truth in your life that is in the same season that you're in.

SPEAKER_01 48:04

Yeah.

unknown 48:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 48:06

No, I think that's great. And so name it, trace it, submit it, replace it. And as I said yesterday, this is how we'll end it, just like we did yesterday. Listen, if that feels overwhelming, the reason it feels overwhelming is because it is. This is not a spiritual or this is not a fleshly battle you're in. Yeah, you're in a spiritual war zone with arrows flying at you that are emotional arrows and mental arrows and relational arrows, all of which to not only get you to try to follow your heart, but to wound your heart. I just think. And then you're following a wounded heart.

SPEAKER_04 48:44

Yes, the imagery of social media. If you're doom scrolling and you're sitting there, which we all do it, you're sitting there and just think about all those arrows coming through your phone, straight to your brain and your heart. Guys, we gotta wake up. We have to realize and take it for what it is and say, like, okay, no more. Like, we're gonna we're gonna pick up the shield of faith. We're gonna, we're gonna defeat these arrows with the God that fights for us. Um but I think just realizing like, okay, I'm doom scrolling. What am I how is this bringing fruit to my life? Is this feeding my fear? Is this feeding my discontentment? Is this feeding my um emotional justification for how I'm treating my husband or my child? You know, like we we really have to take some responsibility here and wake up and see see the arrows for what they are and see what the enemy is trying to do.

SPEAKER_03 49:35

Yeah, for sure. So I point you back to Psalm chapter 61, verses 1 through 3. Hear my cry, oh God, says the psalmist. Listen to my prayer. From the end of the earth I call to you when my heart is faint, or some say when I'm overwhelmed. Right? Lead me to the rock that's higher than I. For you've been my refuge and a strong tower against the enemy. Listen, there's an enemy, it's a spiritual battle. You need a rock that is higher than you.

SPEAKER_01 50:03

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 50:04

If you're gonna navigate this, you need a rock that is far higher than you. You need a tower that is strong that stands firm against the enemy because you and I don't have the ability to do that without God.

SPEAKER_01 50:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:15

So as we feel overwhelmed by this, don't allow the overwhelmed to be just another one of the emotions that becomes the boss of us. Yeah. Let's name it, trace it, submit it to the Lordship of Jesus, and begin to replace it with the truth of the word. And we can only do that by going to the rock that's higher.

SPEAKER_04 50:32

Yeah, so good.

SPEAKER_03 50:34

Anything we want to add? Okay. Amanda, you want to close us in prayer?

SPEAKER_04 50:38

Sure. Dear Lord, thank you so much for this time this morning. Thank you for whoever it is that's listening. I just pray that uh this message this weekend and this podcast plants seeds in their heart and um just becomes a resource to help them navigate the emotions that they might be feeling are taking over their life at this point in time. I pray that they remember the victory that they have in you. I pray that this helps them to fight from a stance of victory that only comes from you. I pray that we remember just how good you are, Lord, and that we can trust that you are our healer, you are our redeemer, and you are capable of restoring all things. Thank you so much for loving us. Thank you for guiding us. Thank you for teaching us. Uh, I pray a special blessing over the listeners, Lord. Thank you so much for this week. And I just pray that the listener feels encouraged after listening to this message today. We love you so much. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.

SPEAKER_03 51:44

Amen. Amen. See y'all next week. Brad, come back, please.

SPEAKER_04 51:49

We miss you, Brad.

SPEAKER_03 51:50

We miss you, Brad.

SPEAKER_04 51:51

Bye. Bye.