Puzzle Buddies: A Comedy Podcast For Adults! Podcast Artwork Image
Puzzle Buddies: A Comedy Podcast For Adults!
3 - Don Fazulli Was A Hack
October 11, 2018 Featuring Molly Hartzell, Clinton Jacob, Lee Kimbrell, and Josh O'Neill

Episode 3 features the first half of a hot puzzle-sesh with special guests Clinton Jacob, Molly Hartzell, Lee Kimbrell, and Josh O’Neill! Lee puts an APB out for some red handlebars and things get NUTSO when a boarder-piece goes missing!  We commiserate our worst bombs of all time and re-tell the first jokes we ever wrote! It’s a whacky-good thyme! 

Season 1: "A Day At The Dock," Episode 3.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1:0:12Devleti. OK welcome back to. The podcast where adults do puzzles.

Speaker 2:0:31US Andrew puzzle buddy Budik. And with me we have three special guests we're going have a fourth. Joining us. So I'd like everybody to go around say your name and see everything you need to know about.

Speaker 3:0:45OK. I am Lee Kimbrell. I am the roommate of the puzzle buddy I'm a puzzle enthusiast myself actually probably like puzzles and better puzzles than Ruediger a little bit which is ironic that he started this podcast anywise who's next.

Speaker 4:1:02I'm Molly Hyde. I'm fucking one of the possible.

Speaker 5:1:09Aislinn Jake a little bit about me. I just took a shit and leaned into his house and it had to flush twice.

Speaker 6:1:15Hell yeah. Well that toilet is kind of malfunctioning. Yes or no. You had a flare up right back at me once. I thought you guys recorded so. Much that I want to make sure you're.

Speaker 7:1:29Still there. Now I miss you. He just pulls it out of his hat and smells like isn't there right now.

Speaker 6:1:35Lana's diner shut out a lot of Stiner and for very good may her toilet yeah. Good shit medially is very good. It made me hungry. Yeah good call. Good start.

Speaker 8:1:48Get started.

Speaker 9:1:50I just got a piece.

Speaker 3:1:53There is a nuance of this thing that we like. We're still going down it's hard especially for me because what I said earlier was a goof I'm no good at puzzles. It's hard. Well I said that as a joke and instead of laughing you got kind of mad that deserves your intensity of puzzled him.

Speaker 10:2:12You don't know the caricature of a man like me. I don't know. I think that's really accurate.

Speaker 3:2:17I don't know if I would like you mad just because I like you so much when you're happy and that's generally what you are.

Speaker 10:2:22Never. Oh yeah. Oh my God said low low key sad boy and boy.

Speaker 11:2:28OK let's get right into it. I prepared frequently.

Speaker 12:2:34For people and they're all very dumb and very elementary like communications 101 questions.

Speaker 9:2:43Life is still over my thoughts. That's puzzling. That's the class that you taught in college right. I.

Speaker 13:2:49Taught English.

Speaker 14:2:51Yes.

Speaker 15:2:53Didn't you say as communication though. Yeah that's what it's going to seem like.

Speaker 16:2:59I toss. Yeah yeah I taught English but English isn't communication 101 you've got your life ready. Why not communicate. I'm not lying I'm just high. That is exactly what. I.

Speaker 17:3:14Said. My name is good friends. Okay Molly. First yes. Molly's a good speller.

Speaker 15:3:24Yeah. Affidavit.

Speaker 7:3:27Oh boy that's off the grid.

Speaker 18:3:29And then he writes that he slowed down.

Speaker 19:3:36Yes. Hey.

Speaker 2:3:40I see you had it you were off one letter and I have to look out as. Yes I ve I.T. have.

Speaker 18:3:50David is a hard word to spell and say yes you did get your teeth. Yeah.

Speaker 20:3:58You know how you can have. You can have these ideas about yourself.

Speaker 21:4:03Know you have these ideas about yourself that you'd think for a long time but then just when they realize they are true.

Speaker 22:4:10Are you trying to say I'm not a good speller because I don't know how to say that. I always thought that I. Spelled.

Speaker 11:4:17All fucking screen. If you say that I. See are.

Speaker 10:4:25No you are a good speller could not even handle that David.

Speaker 21:4:29But no I've just always in my head told myself that I was a good speller and I'm just not at all. Hey I'm just not good at spelling.

Speaker 7:4:36I get very bad at it actually. He's not a spell. You spell can't spell. Because I'm addicted to my phone.

Speaker 11:4:46Can you can using it all by right. Yes. If I have to write anything down like analog with my hand.

Speaker 23:4:56I can't do it because I can't spell shit at home. I can't fucking spell anything. You know what's interesting about the word analog is that the first four letters are anal.

Speaker 24:5:05Is a pretty interesting thing. Fun fact. But yeah that is manly. You're right that's fun for the whole family.

Speaker 25:5:12Speaking of family by dialogue would be a nightmare for a gay rapper. The analog analog state.

Speaker 17:5:27I guess see that raffia. I guess I'd probably would do. Gas is tight.

Speaker 9:5:34We're self-proclaimed. Real quick to our sponsors Sheila and Lenny Riddick.

Speaker 11:5:40Love you guys when we do. Or why not. I'm not your spawn mom from my dad.

Speaker 6:5:48Sure it doesn't but I hope your mom pop we were listening we were listening to the awesome soundtrack or theme music that actually the old Jacob made it. Can't believe I didn't even bring that up into.

Speaker 2:6:03The intro song was made by Clinton using garage band he made it in one hour is bad and you know it was more like 30 minutes. Mix the whole thing.

Speaker 26:6:12It was a good song.

Speaker 11:6:14It was pretty cool. Damn.

Speaker 10:6:17Good. Just do it all over your head. No but it was funny we were laughing about it when you listened to it.

Speaker 20:6:24It definitely sounds like the jingle to a kid's show. Yeah.

Speaker 3:6:28And if you were just if you were to just get sucked in by theme music alone would be a very misleading theme song.

Speaker 27:6:37Yeah. Because so far we've touched on those kids to get kidnapped and they've definitely who's going to be okay after all that Seydel talk sounds like we have a guest. Yay. Oh my word. Who could it be. It's like a lamb.

Speaker 24:6:53It's not something great nor Hello friends just project into the center. Up next. Hello.

Speaker 28:7:05Hello.

Speaker 29:7:07How can you charge him. He'll go ahead and tell everybody viewers one thing about yourself. Oh man I love puzzles more than adjured.

Speaker 30:7:20Hawesville presents I'm a puzzle final. That's what. That's what everyone calls me to it. Follow mispronounces. Oh come on. City rape. Puzzles more than me puzzles and separate houses and finish them because like I said I'm. Good.

Speaker 31:7:48To see him in just comes from Boston.

Speaker 32:7:51I do family in Massachusetts three and Austin beard. You

Speaker 2:7:57know Tom just in guest hosting this last fucking podcast.

Speaker 32:8:02It's a really good time just an impression this is just not waffle house.

Speaker 33:8:08Hash browns. So if you could. I would like. Chili on one side and then gravy on the other side.

Speaker 32:8:15And then I like to have a Frakes tells him every single time he loves the fact that we have Waffle House and this is why I keep coming back to Ohio.

Speaker 20:8:24That's it. What is this possible. This is right on the dock.

Speaker 17:8:29We're going to do season a podcast the season one day stock price for 25 of its 200 bus ticket.

Speaker 12:8:39I bought them from the local Kroger's. I would like to say that I have put together almost an entire red bicycle on my.

Speaker 34:8:49Card. Thank you very much for that. That was pretty cool. That's actually that's pretty strong. There appears to be a lot of grass over there. Hey Clinton you are my grass. That's one thing. That's one thing it's quality.

Speaker 35:9:04I'll trade you the artist name.

Speaker 36:9:07Sharon. Now. Okay now we're puzzling. Do you have because I watch and rooted do it like he does. You have like a technique. He goes there. There are multiple times. Yeah you kind of like. I know. I like the idea of putting all of them together like like like.

Speaker 37:9:26There's a definite structure much like Joe crying haha.

Speaker 27:9:30Oh yeah you do. Your strategy is to go to the very end and you have a difficult pattern.

Speaker 37:9:39Been struggling with most of the pieces I organized the piece by Shaid answered but there are so many different variations of so many shapes.

Speaker 38:9:48Am I dumb for saying there's two into outs like just hush period. That's that's why you call that cat hushpuppies.

Speaker 27:9:56This guy this is your man right here he's just three holes and he likes to party. I have a feeling you're coming up. I am coming to help it's a visual point to go to out one that's to whatever I said.

Speaker 37:10:10Just that last one I can remember pass down. It's a Hashmat down. Exactly what I. Said.

Speaker 17:10:18With the hash Modafferi to get it. This guy is a lonely.

Speaker 1:10:25Man and we're Ginnane over here on this road. And I got. Say. Haunted. And. Toilet.

Speaker 24:10:33Just piled up.

Speaker 34:10:35I guess I get the head of the boy if anyone has the boy's body to get ahead of the boy that boy body yet it started with a neck looking a little carriage described looking. It is a cell that contains casting.

Speaker 11:10:51Is a white matter with blue stripes on the rats tail tilts the head of the head. I can think of it I'm stupid as far would anybody like a sip of the puzzle body official water.

Speaker 24:11:09Sponsored by the Northern Kentucky water authority to tap the water.

Speaker 27:11:16Actually let's go ahead and give a fuck you how old you are. Yeah the sanitation was Betty.

Speaker 16:11:23Peggy. Peggy. Right quick fuck you to Peggy Lee.

Speaker 39:11:29Horrible very rude very rude woman who works at the sewage department who gave us a bill and tried to shut off her water because there. Yes. Do you pay for water.

Speaker 20:11:40Yes and sanitation separately not told they were sent to the bill for the different departments the first two months I was paying their bills. I was paying the sanitation I was paying the water department for my sanitation state and they were just accepting it and just taking it. So I just even asked them if he was in the right place. I showed them the address. Oh well you know what they paid me. To tighten. Its.

Speaker 11:12:07Belt. I didn't say them because I wanted to say they're not super PC hey.

Speaker 14:12:15You guys just everyone is on board.

Speaker 10:12:18I got the feel of a boys was 0 oh there it is. Like this song is.

Speaker 21:12:24Yeah exactly. No is going to come next.

Speaker 24:12:26Now we need to find the dream. Lending. Money to the center.

Speaker 34:12:33I just watched. I guess it was just me. The 2011 reboot of Freddy Krueger.

Speaker 40:12:40Oh my God it's God the guy who paid Roarty. Oh yeah you're okay. Yeah dude he's a beast. Yeah.

Speaker 33:12:50That's really weird. You bring it up.

Speaker 41:12:51I've been light on a huge Elm Street cake like this whole past we really is someone brought in all seven of the Nightmare on Elm Street on VHS to the video archive. Last time I watched all those and then I found out there was like a 5 hour documentary about everything.

Speaker 20:13:08That would be interesting to watch so Kraehenbuehl idea of that movie is trippiest.

Speaker 42:13:12Oh yeah I like how you can be like you know you don't know if they're asleep and then you realize that their dream in it and they wake up and then they woken up in their dream is still there. It is always very. Kind of.

Speaker 43:13:23Lines are always can be blurry sometimes but it's interesting. You know it's based off like newspaper articles that Wes Craven read like about these like South American refugees who were like sacred psychiatric unit and they were keeping like coffee pots in their closet and not taking their sleeping pills and they were like if I go to sleep I'm going to die. And they eventually just held them down and sedated them and like you know they put them away and they're fine and like attendants walked away for like a couple minutes and then they just heard my blood curdling screams and like they come back and the person's dead.

Speaker 20:13:59So that's why I love it. Friends you're ready is real friendly is real would surprise me.

Speaker 42:14:06There's got to be some sort of weird shit that exists in dreamland that if the wires crossed in reality it could happen.

Speaker 40:14:12Oh yeah you ruined me.

Speaker 43:14:14You know what I mean there's also a bomb like your body reacting to the anxiety of your dreams. You know right like the way you can be in a dream and there's sleep paralysis you feel like you've got no control.

Speaker 42:14:26What is the Kimbel. Is it oxytocin. There's some chemical that's released while you're dreaming so that. You. Don't fully fucking freak out and like jump out of bed it's if you walk.

Speaker 44:14:39It means that you have a of it so you like react to your dreams in real life it's costly to use. It's called sleep Juice's problem probably know what it's called when I could recall that well oxytocin can be used to induce abortion.

Speaker 18:14:52That's why we need to get that shot. That's why. It is. Yeah.

Speaker 32:15:03Yeah yeah I was getting into the here this part is sometimes you actually do what I'm looking at.

Speaker 20:15:09It's the only problem with the hose being the nozzle aficionado although I'd like to dispel that notion.

Speaker 21:15:18Having enough people on this show helps. If it was just two people yeah. I can zone out and you CUCs do all the work. Yeah that's what we have right. CLINTON This guy.

Speaker 45:15:28This has been fun. Let's go ahead and wrap this. Little boy. Five minutes of a very simple goodnight epiphany joke. That's always a good closing up.

Speaker 11:15:39Musicians on stage. KERRY.

Speaker 8:15:49Transitioning into the comedy field that music has helped me and in what way.

Speaker 46:15:57That was a really good intro of my dad doing music has made me not scared to be on the stage. Also not afraid to say anything when you're two very useful skills.

Speaker 47:16:13Yeah I have no fear of bombing or I don't get upset about it or anything like that and I'm not afraid of people.

Speaker 48:16:20And that's something that's something that I do definitely see in musicians and even just like in between songs like bands doing banter. Yeah I think there are some bands that are funny and really funny but like you go to plan to kind of things like just a normal concert they'll try and throw jokes out there. And they don't care whether or not they get laughs They're just talking.

Speaker 35:16:40It's part of it. You're hiding behind an instrument or might you know like. And that's I think the biggest thing and. I do hate a band.

Speaker 7:16:51So I hate bands who are serious about their music but they're trying to be silly not weird al. I don't give a shit. Yeah you know what I mean. Why does he even do bands if he goes and changes his costume.

Speaker 46:17:02Let the video speak for itself and the songs and the lyrics and shit but I hate a band who's like Oh we're gonna be silly like I hate that and lo the band who was like I'm going to be a silly band like I'm not into that at all and what constitutes silliness like a band who will I get the idea of wearing like like stage clothes you have like a stage outfitter stage persona for music because it is like it's visual as much as is music.

Speaker 44:17:29When you perform because I was going to bring up part of the reason why you're so hardened on onstage is you're a musician. But then you also like you toured with the band and you guys performed dresses on stage. So you were doing some some strange tell a story you told me before about. Al's bar yeah.

Speaker 49:17:49Oh yeah.

Speaker 46:17:50So we played at Al's bar in Kentucky the whole idea of my group Mr. flies was to be a band that sold themselves as a jazz band. But then when we showed up we played metal. And it was the whole idea was to just get shit on by crowds to be hated.

Speaker 11:18:07It was to just be hate it and it was metal.

Speaker 47:18:10It was good music but we played Al's bar and we showed up at that point. We were wearing the dresses only came around because of Halloween because we dressed as 60s nurses and were like whoa it's really hot. Half the places we played were comfortable and plus it fit the aesthetic as the band was like a very like scary band that's what we want it to be. It is really. Haunting.

Speaker 46:18:32And we played Al's bar and we set up and we show up and the dress is really hard to get up like stairs and we got maybe a minute into a song and a guy yelled Fuck you and I just immediately responded with fuck you too and just got punched.

Speaker 11:18:47Clinton may have had a hero's journey. Yeah. I got those hot headed gays. Yeah I got punched and then it kind of knocked me out.

Speaker 47:18:56And I got back up and then the sound came up and gave us our money and said You guys should just leave us safe. And that was our bar and like it happened in Canton to a guy in Cannes who's the same guy that.

Speaker 11:19:10You guys are married. Man I wish I could be comfortable with. He buys all of them or she's really for it. It's my dad. It's my dad.

Speaker 50:19:23No it's weird. I think it I think it does transition though because. Again I'm not I'm not uncomfortable saying dumb shit. I'm not afraid to try something because I mean like you said I would dressed in front of people for a very long time. Yeah. And there was times when we showed up in the dresses before anyone knew who.

Speaker 26:19:42Yeah. So I was like I'm not uncomfortable with bombing I'm not uncomfortable with the mind. I mean it does get. It doesn't mean. At the end I think about it I still think about stuff. Of course you do. You have to.

Speaker 11:19:56It appears that Josh and Molly celebrating her early clerestory wasn't that great because Molly is doing gang signs with sentences.

Speaker 51:20:05We've got we've had a boy. We connected it to the shoulder of the boy headpiece the boy headpieces now with the shoulder man and then the man is with the other boy had it.

Speaker 33:20:18We've got like the top half of their bodies.

Speaker 6:20:20Honestly I have to say the boy has been pretty important so I think let that slide that that does Trump. Never mind the other boy is a girl.

Speaker 24:20:29The other yeah got the heavier my back to my school.

Speaker 21:20:33This is why you know you're pulling for the whole time. You do.

Speaker 52:20:40Go.

Speaker 20:20:43And put a name out for some red bike handlebars. So if you see that go ahead it's me cause I'm the bike boy. I've seen a wheel notice. A. Slight.

Speaker 53:20:55Problem or something.

Speaker 11:20:57I just like putting a puzzle of Jesus over red handlebars for instance put an APB out some red handlebars.

Speaker 13:21:06Could call. You want to do that but can't find the right.

Speaker 20:21:09So what do you got. What do you do. You realize look back in your life and realize that.

Speaker 13:21:13You have a piece put in there and correct. You take it and it changes your whole perspective like you start. To. Fit.

Speaker 11:21:24Andrew that was pretty mean. What episode is this one number three. I got access to that Tom doesn't get. That's crazy. Very it's very funny that it's funny because he's just making fun of old times like this dumb fucking puzzle cast. Great. He's one of them. This is five minutes more or less for the second time this is. I. Can I ask the question that maybe has been asked if it has just cut me off.

Speaker 47:21:52Can everybody go around roundabout and tell your first about the first time you went on stage.

Speaker 54:21:57Oh that's great. No I did ask Rand that but I actually have her and don't ask her about.

Speaker 13:22:03Things yet. I see it as the first time as I liked.

Speaker 55:22:08It. I think that once again will do that too. And yet so think Ridder's time you it. The first time I went on stage was at the.

Speaker 54:22:19Top of the dance Clifton which apparently a lot of comments to make said this wasn't just a general.

Speaker 26:22:24So there it is.

Speaker 13:22:28But I had a bunch of friends there. So when. Should.

Speaker 47:22:35You know what I mean. Like it was like I want to see you remember one of your jokes he thought was hilarious. But yeah we can do on and off.

Speaker 21:22:43I did it once in 7th grade but that's what I'm here to talk about.

Speaker 38:22:48You do this in 7th grade. Yeah I've talked about this on other podcasts. I'm sure everyone's as they were.

Speaker 33:22:55Yeah I know I did. I did a show on my seventh grade course content. I did other comedians jokes back in class.

Speaker 43:23:03They want to be like my teacher trying to make me sing instead I would just be like I told jokes and then I would just do bits like you know Michael bigly and Jim Gaffigan Mitch Hedberg.

Speaker 33:23:12Bunch of people just tell Jay tosh. Like in 2007 I was doing it. I was destroyed. Merde breezy.

Speaker 43:23:21And yeah that was the first landed the first time I ever did stand up though was like the summer before I moved here from college. I was in Massachusetts and I hit up this tiny little thing improv theater and I remember the first show I did the first job and it just didn't go over at all. And I still think it's kind of funny. That I would never be a thing I would do my act is oh about you guys but when I go to.

Speaker 33:23:49Hooters I get a big ole boner when I say I love ranch and silence. And was like oh no one does the best joke and by. Tonight I. Think.

Speaker 11:24:06I might use it.

Speaker 56:24:08I haven't read it to you first. That's hilarious.

Speaker 57:24:19I kind of had a softball my first time too I didn't know where to look. That you could do state of comedy and open mikes in bars and shit I just thought you have to go to a club. And so I did open mike your comedy up Broadway down of Lexington and so many friends and family can go watch it.

Speaker 34:24:40Yeah I have it on tape and it was actually really good. It wasn't really good it was not bad it was for her for it was really good for us. I was teaching at the time so I was very used to be in front of people.

Speaker 57:24:53What you super comfortable while I was everyone in the whole fucking audience laughs at everything I said there my friend.

Speaker 58:25:01Don't know it was fun.

Speaker 27:25:02Best Yeah thanks.

Speaker 58:25:05I was supposed to be three minutes and I did two minutes. You should get five minutes.

Speaker 57:25:12Because all teacher material I'm actually performing that closes tomorrow. Nice job from the Yeah. I'm a middle school teacher and one thing that I found out is that middle school teachers are all freaks because they go to work every day and no one ever listens to them and no one ever pays attention to them so when they go home it is time to relieve some stress in the bedroom.

Speaker 44:25:38Guess who. Guess whose husbands get tired of the ball gag. Miss Johnson that I did it's like don't you talk back to me or something.

Speaker 31:25:45It was very bad.

Speaker 54:25:49We also had several affairs. This is this is a middle school.

Speaker 34:25:54That is not true.

Speaker 59:25:57This is a middle school teacher having sex art class once. If you're coming out twice. Please me.

Speaker 18:26:15Quiet. It was about 10 months ago. I was friends with all of these guys so they needed a girlfriend show and they. Said.

Speaker 24:26:29Yeah they texted me and asked me Can we go abroad. When you go abroad to tell some and joke go up and I went onstage and talks about blowjobs we cried.

Speaker 18:26:44Yeah. So I packed the room full of my friends it was my first time.

Speaker 22:26:49There were some amazing guys from New York that were headlining they were touring and I got to get up right before the headliner and I'd never felt that type of nerves. I've never gotten that nervous before and I'm pretty darling. It feels disgusting and I hate it but afterwards it was worth it.

Speaker 18:27:10I guess I'm like a little Cincinnati celebrity sprinkled in that a lot of real cool. None of them come anymore.

Speaker 21:27:16I think I found the torso of the boy.

Speaker 24:27:20Oh my God. It's interesting. All five of us have.

Speaker 53:27:24A bit of a natural advantage because we've all been in some sort of way on stage and some some respect.

Speaker 21:27:30Josh Powell I did. Tom. Calma. Here. You.

Speaker 24:27:41Go.

Speaker 21:27:47If you had to guess which Billy Joel song I did a solo piano. No why. No because you shouldn't be sorry and say. No. It's the one song that's actually Rockapella the album. Not for the longest time.

Speaker 60:27:59Oh yeah.

Speaker 32:28:16That's awesome. I love that you didn't know until where it was. It was just mostly freshman year.

Speaker 48:28:24Part of sophomore year. It was less than a year but. That was who I was. I did that now and do stand up comedy. And it was fun. GLINTON You asked the question sorry I said you bully. Well there's actually.

Speaker 50:28:40When I was 18 I signed up for it go bananas really amateur at 18. What year was that. In.

Speaker 7:28:502010. Wow. Yeah.

Speaker 49:28:53And I signed up and it was only because I was like I want to do so bad 18. I tried to join and. I signed up. I wrote basically nothing at all like I had nothing. I just thought that I was going to go up there and it was going to be fucking.

Speaker 50:29:11People are going to throw the chair off to rich people are going to love it. And I wrote some stuff down. I could not remember the jokes at all.

Speaker 46:29:20But they were I know that they were any count.

Speaker 50:29:22And I remember I had some ship wrote down in a comedian there. Been there and I wish I could figure out who it was. But he was like oh you're new and I was like has never done this before. He said well what do you talk about that kind of went through the stuff and he was like. Oh. Don't say any of that.

Speaker 24:29:40This is a totally clean club.

Speaker 7:29:42Don't say anything like man. And I'm like 18 you know I'm like fucking scared yeah.

Speaker 23:29:48So they call me and I go up and I say nothing I like don't fucking say anything. I said I remember I dropped whatever paper I had and I like scrambled for it and people laughed at that and I.

Speaker 7:30:02Don't even remember what I said but I know I said basically my. That's really funny that you mentioned that one of the persons I ever did stand up and go home and as I.

Speaker 28:30:13Videotaped and put it on the internet it was so embarrassing i'm wearing basketball shorts and suddenly a picture of some my profile picture. Yeah.

Speaker 61:30:29Yeah in the middle of it.

Speaker 33:30:30I forgot what a joke I was going to tell and I had them all typed out on computer paper and I pulled out two giant pieces of computer paper out of my shorts and I looked at him and I was trembling and I was nervous. And then like I put the video up and someone was talking to me afterwards. I mean does he get set. I think that thing you did were you pulled the paper out of your shorts and you said I see where you were going for but it wasn't great. And I would just like getting a tiny notebook.

Speaker 45:31:01Shaking in fear thing was great man. I still do that I still shake like I still have that.

Speaker 58:31:07Vote you know you don't see it in most people if you take a piece of paper and hold it up even if like because you have a little bit of nerves beat up there no matter what. Then you put something to view it through and then plus if you're pulling somebody's pocket and reading it you kind of take a chance anyway.

Speaker 57:31:24So you are more nervous than a normal bit. Yeah. You know I've noticed that when people sit up my home. With the reset though like all that time it passed and I was so scared to do standup like after that fucking terrified and then shonky at Mr. sushi's it's like.

Speaker 49:31:40Because he'd been doing standup and I was like Oh yeah I was like I've always wanted to try that. He's like You should try it. And. I have. The video on my phone of the first time he did stand up and it was Schubert who brought me on and I talked to all I talked about it it was like nonsense I said something funny and I told people to stop laughing and clapping like you know really smart to do cool and different it's very very Boulez's every time you and I talk about Kings Island which makes zero sense and then I just kind of walked off and I think Jeffers is because Shawnees videotaping it from the back and Jeffers is in the corner being who the fuck is this to be this guy.

Speaker 7:32:27I was also on the stage for two minutes night seem a short man.

Speaker 57:32:32I do like that I love it when someone goes up there and does three and a half minutes. Oh it's my film working on it and I got it I got to go like holy shit when I ever like. I feel like I. Should be advice.

Speaker 26:32:45Like I'm sure all the time. I still go short if I know it's fucking going bad. I will leave. You're not going to waste my time. And everybody else fucking. Now who likes to go along. With.

Speaker 31:33:00Me. Now. To find someone else. Right.

Speaker 54:33:06It's true. JD likes to go.

Speaker 44:33:12To our shows and it's real fun. Yeah like Legio.

Speaker 45:33:30I love it. More the more states have the better get up there and you don't get to do that.

Speaker 18:33:40I thought you had to go up even if they never made if you were coming up and you five had an open mike so I found out pretty recently actually what I was doing in months to come and do the whole day. So I just been doing the same shit over and over to my friends and it's a hard reputation to share.

Speaker 49:34:07From my perspective I don't get mad at anybody that's doing this stuff. I never get upset because I feel like a lot of people are working through it. Like it may be Dunlevy. I don't know if I want to if I'm repeating a bunch of stuff that I've been working on I'm not as worried.

Speaker 33:34:22About them being mad at me for it. I'm just like you can't be bored. Yeah I get to tune out and it's going to be whatever I get my confidence. Maybe I've learned how to save the joke. Like more like ultimately I will just be in my own head about it. That's what doing new jokes does for me is also true for comics is like.

Speaker 7:34:45Going to happen no matter what. And. Yeah.

Speaker 33:34:49I didn't hear you my whole thing is just you know me I'm anxious I need everyone to like you know. So like if I'm not a man it's my roommate Cranston.

Speaker 45:34:59He beats me down so much.

Speaker 11:35:01He just tells me some nice violent person is evil violent he's a violent guy.

Speaker 53:35:08First time I went out to go as I was worried about it. I was trying to calm down by 30 seconds. We're outside. Because. I was.

Speaker 11:35:20Reprimanded you you we're in here tonight.

Speaker 62:35:25You don't tell me my favorite story about you getting reprimanded is when we were in the pool room that nuclear freeze in like 2013 and you were talking to your friends and Donnie Fizuli rock and Johnny Fizuli goes out to listen and fuck you Johnny Fizuli Johnny Fizuli I want to know this sounds great.

Speaker 33:35:51He would do. He just told you to not do dick jokes he told me his exact quote was in front of a bunch of my friends right now and this was like I was like a month two months and. He came up to me and he like the guy like that. Sounds. Like. He's like Hey. You talking like deep onstage right now which.

Speaker 11:36:13Is pretty solid advice but it's time to place a few bright and continue. Five years later. Like me. Yeah I don't like her but I also like the concept of people being like. Mad at new comics being like your friend. He was just somebody he was trying to talk down to me. So it is natural. And then John Holmes convince me that he was dead although so.

Speaker 31:36:46Blasi what's he doing. He's out somewhere in the world. Of International.

Speaker 21:36:51News special. What number was I we should we shouldn't be dishing. I know you're saying his name to be out of the way you. Mentioned.

Speaker 33:37:05Pick a name to replace him with Rodney Dangerfield or Chris Greer.

Speaker 45:37:12Wait hold on a second.

Speaker 47:37:14Whatever name you say nobody talking to you say it don't cut that clip and replace it over every single time he said that person's day.

Speaker 19:37:21Yes that's right. Maybe. It's. Something Italian. OK that we can zone a job.

Speaker 11:37:31You got to have a sound Tony Pisolite Zepps Jesus Christ.

Speaker 15:37:39All right.

Speaker 11:37:41Donny Fizuli there we go. First time back would you say that it's going to be replaced with.

Speaker 63:37:51Dad.

Speaker 11:37:56I got my real clear version. You know I'm walking here as improvise in that movie.

Speaker 33:38:04Yeah I would just grab those midnight cowboy there's that scene. John Wayne does not mean the walking down the street and the cat. Comes up to Dustin Hoffman's like lady just like. Like it was just a cab happened to drive to the shop when they were filming. I was never supposed to happen.

Speaker 41:38:23Which is great because if you watch it. Hoffman handles it like a pro. Jon Voight is trying hard not to break and the cab driver is genuinely the most angry person you know it's the best actor.

Speaker 51:38:35It's so great. That's awesome.

Speaker 21:38:38I never seen that. It's a it's a heavy one. Do you think he would you think he went and saw it in the theaters and noticed it was him.

Speaker 33:38:46No. He seems too cool for that. He probably he'd probably quit movies after that.

Speaker 21:38:50No I'm talking about the I'm saying he probably saw that it was a movie set you saying I hate these days and I'll never watch want to get my wife makes a song one more time.

Speaker 11:39:03He had just me. I love him. Yes.

Speaker 15:39:07Ma'am. I'm like fucking you. Oh come on that is nice. Any funny stuff can you voice.

Speaker 18:39:18It. Yeah. Just afterwards you can just quietly say I said that and I told him I'd like to say that was racist.

Speaker 11:39:31And Josh says no more. I said no and an obvious laugh track over everyone's bad jokes. Oh that's great. So funny. Say yeah it's your job. Just saying. Audience laughs Yeah. Crickets. Whichever one you guys prefer. I like the love of a good.

Speaker 59:39:57One right. Yeah yeah. SIMON ever hosted at Govan as the first set I went up I go up I say how's everybody doing.

Speaker 43:40:05Mikey is in the back and he puts on the cricket noise. I.

Speaker 59:40:14Was crazy. Can I tell it for the first time. It was really funny though. I.

Speaker 55:40:21Can't tell the story. OK.

Speaker 54:40:25So far we see that Bastable cherry. Oh I see sad about that. How much six months a year and didn't think you would be a bad idea. Fundraiser's showing and Jim says there's like 12 people teachers spread out in bleachers and he is every single comment since including Mikey and like all these headliners just like everybody was there and I proceed to bomb so hard.

Speaker 11:40:52And then Mikey who I don't need to know that. Well yes. Get the fuck off stage and get back to the game. He stage. The booker of the club or the club and I walk up to Gate trying to find solace and I say.

Speaker 53:41:10Man it's horrible.

Speaker 54:41:13Yeah man I never would've done that show. Yeah that's like it sounds awful.

Speaker 11:41:19But as an early comic you're like what you want. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Any stooge times good Scootch time.

Speaker 13:41:27Even worse than that show was me just retired. Yeah the crickets or the laugh track. Gets lots of cricket.

Speaker 59:41:39Over here. One of the most fun parts about doing a show like on a patio or like a backyard it's like you could do well but every now and then you like those are crickets. I hear crickets right now.

Speaker 57:41:49Actual cricket there rubbing their legs like me.

Speaker 28:41:53Let me see the notebook what kind of other questions are you gonna get through this one night or this one. Okay. Faulknerian kill. Okay. I love radio shack.

Speaker 54:42:07Okay Ruth Bader Ginsburg. Okay. And then the ghost of Steve Jobs.

Speaker 34:42:15Goes retail. I guess no ghostwrote don't don't retain well now.

Speaker 11:42:20Interesting question. I would argue they do. Okay well I would argue obviously. Hey all the best people in the rich world knows that when you marry Steve Jobs ghost because you can't kill a I kill.

Speaker 45:42:40Me You can't kill the ghost because the glasses are already set. It's still Hauspie and goes dead.

Speaker 59:42:52Man. I don't know if. Contrasting the floor we're definitely you're not fucking that goes that goes. It's okay. To. Kill with get it being Bader Ginsburg from just being such an uppity between now.

Speaker 64:43:10And then. She thinks she married.

Speaker 13:43:16Marry Steve Jobs just kidding.

Speaker 18:43:19So. Hey Steve Jobs goes you kill. Shaquille O'Neal.

Speaker 33:43:26Because there are too many the and.

Speaker 2:43:29I told you this is I'm ready.

Speaker 41:43:31I'm always so sick of people I've told silver anything like you like on a show like what's your name like Josh O'Neill like Shaquille O'Neal. It's like.

Speaker 11:43:44When my dad forgot to say that guy.

Speaker 59:43:49So he's not good at basketball. I listen to a song today about how Aaron Carter beat him one on one dude. That's. How.

Speaker 35:44:00We took that road trip but I have an album I found it when I was cleaning out my old house party. No it is not in my house. It is my birthday mix tape a CD with 12 songs on it.

Speaker 33:44:15I gave I burned a bunch of them. I put them in all my friends goodie bags.

Speaker 59:44:19Some highlights of the first track is flying without wings by Ruben Studdard.

Speaker 51:44:26Oh yeah you guys were talking over at the terrible man here tear the listeners eyes gleaming with delight.

Speaker 45:44:36The second trackways the second track was.

Speaker 41:44:41That's how I beat Shaq. Third was skater boy who was the theme song to the movie Holz.

Speaker 65:44:51Oh hey. Hey. What's that you're smelling dawg. That's me. I'll take showers. I don't brush my teeth.

Speaker 51:45:00That's due holes and drink and sleep. Oh wow.

Speaker 58:45:08And then dig a hole. Oh oh.

Speaker 32:45:11And then there was. Parents Just Don't Understand. Don't let the dogs out.

Speaker 33:45:17There are three Balmond songs on it and then the last songs the last few songs are the theme song from Malcolm in the middle and fever by Peggy Lee. You ever hear fever by Peggy Lee. Saying that she'd never know we never see you when you burn your friends they all got you burned by one.

Speaker 66:45:57Greetings fellow puzzle people weird puzzle bloodies inc. really appreciate you tuning in and listening if you'd like the podcast. Please go over to iTunes and leave us a review. Share the podcast and talk to your friends about it. You can find us on Instagram Twitter Facebook and all that jazz. All right. Puzzle freaks scrape an extra. Devleti.

Speaker 67:46:31If you get a funny dab.

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