The Human Story- How We Got Here

In this first episode of The Human Story brought to you by Yoked Media, hosts Lincoln and Shaamiela take a pause to reflect on the road that brought them here to the mic, to each other, and to this unfolding podcast. They share a bit of their personal journeys, what stirred the vision for The Human Story, and why now feels like the right time to hold space for real, raw and deeply personal conversations.

This episode is less about answers and more about beginnings the kind that invite you to lean in, reflect, and feel seen.

Welcome to The Human Story where every voice matters, every story counts, and being human is enough.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:00

You're listening to the Human Story Podcast, conversations on the all-encompassing human experience.

SPEAKER_01: 0:07

This is brought to you by Yolk Media. Welcome to this podcast. Hi, I'm Lincoln.

SPEAKER_00: 0:24

And I'm Shamila.

SPEAKER_01: 0:25

And welcome to the Human Story Podcast. Shamla, what is your version of the human story?

SPEAKER_00: 0:30

So this is a place we come to breathe, laugh, play and rest and from this place to reconsider our human being.

SPEAKER_01: 0:42

I love that.

SPEAKER_00: 0:43

So that's the serious explanation. Okay. But the truth is you're actually here to play. And maybe that's a good place for you and I to start because Lincoln and I are friends. We've been friends for like 20 years.

SPEAKER_01: 0:56

20 years. I still remember the very first day I met you. And yeah, like I say, I think it was destined to end where we are right now. Based on the conversation we had then. And we'll share a bit of that. But you're right. It's been a combination of 20 years, a lot of growth, a lot of experiences, a lot of coffee dates. But it's always been also a friendship that has endured, like I said, almost 20 years. But there's been much growth and reflection offered by you as an individual. Yeah. So that is something that I guess in the podcast as well we'll share with listeners because we want to take them on a journey, you know, that hopefully some of the or most of the content can actually resonate with them.

SPEAKER_00: 1:41

Absolutely. And I think... I actually spoke to my therapist. I do have a therapist. Good. And I'll tell you a little bit more about what I do. But in my field, we encourage to be in either a form of therapy or supervision. And we were talking about my childhood and she asked me, can you tell me about something that really stands out in terms of what you really enjoyed doing as a child? I said, I can't think of an activity particularly because, you know, we were the barefoot children. We were that generation. But what I could think about was being with my friends. And it was such an interesting insight to me because I don't think I'd, I mean, I'd known that because when I spend time with my friends, I'm feel very joyful. And most of my friendships have a playfulness to it and a silliness to it. And, and often, you know, and with you as well, these, I don't have to hide parts of myself, you know, and be afraid to kind of like share my vulnerabilities. Yeah. But that was a good insight because it, yeah, it made me think of this. It made me think of, we want to have these conversations that are psycho-spiritual in nature. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Yeah. Just like every one of these episodes will probably be different. Sure. Because it won't just be our voices. Yes. So everybody knows. True. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 3:27

Yeah, I completely, I mean, everything you said, I mean, I can agree with. It's literally been the same for me. Those conversations have always added value to me as an individual. And I've always felt very light walking away from those conversations. You know, I know you speak, but often we speak about it. That, you know, you have interactions in life, whether it's in a workspace or, you know, with friends at times, and you can kind of leave their feeling drained. So the important part for me is, like you say, choosing your friends wisely to add value. And I really trust that, you know, as we have kind of grown in our self-development as human beings. that this can be a space where the same can be offered back to listeners. Because, you know, I've always found myself to be behind the scenes. So kind of being vulnerable to put this out is not a familiar space for me. But I also realize that, you know, we don't stay the same as individuals. So our experiences get us to a point where we actually, you know, we choose to look at things a bit differently and offer back. And I'm really grateful for those experiences that I've had. I think everything My life up until now has brought me to this point. And I really trust that as you and I have fun on this podcast and just chat about various things that we've shared and obviously speak to other voices too. that we can really be a reflection to others and go, hey, I can relate to that in some way or it can spark a thought for you to look into that and possibly say, you know, I like this and I'd like to obviously also explore this a bit more. And I think that's the important part for me, that we have general conversations about topics and it can really spur on someone to literally kind of just look into their own life and go like, Yeah, I really like that. I didn't think about that. So that for me is the essence of what I really like to achieve.

SPEAKER_00: 5:15

I agree. And I was reading the end of a book actually that I managed to finish. Yeah. Because I read multiple books at a time. Wow, in

SPEAKER_01: 5:24

this age, that's quite unique. Well

SPEAKER_00: 5:26

done. It is, it is. Yeah, I've had a break from like work stuff and more serious stuff and I've needed to read novels. But I wanted to finish this book and I did. And... It's actually a quote. Can I share it?

SPEAKER_01: 5:38

Yes, of course.

SPEAKER_00: 5:38

Okay, so, and what you just said sparked it because I think part of the conversations we have with each other and including other people is, to me, it's more about, and often is also in my work, it's about getting people to ask questions.

SPEAKER_01: 5:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 5:56

It's really, I know that we think that it's about seeking the answers, but I think the question is the important thing. You know, a question that kind of leads you down a path, you know, of, Exploring something or exploring a thought or an emotion or something like that. But this is the quote and it's by Rilke, which

SPEAKER_01: 6:13

is

SPEAKER_00: 6:14

incredible. It says, Be patient toward all that is unresolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not seek the answers which cannot be given to you because you would not be able to live them. Live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will, then gradually, without noticing it. live a long, some distant day into the answer.

SPEAKER_01: 6:41

Wow.

SPEAKER_00: 6:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 6:43

Yeah. That's beautiful and deep.

SPEAKER_00: 6:45

It is. It is. I mean, we won't unpack it. Yeah. Because it's going to take a while. Okay. Yeah. I mean, and that's the thing. I feel like to stop and go, okay, where did that take you? Tell me where that took you.

SPEAKER_01: 6:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 6:58

You know, was there a question that came with that? And yeah, I think... There's almost a presence we have to almost learn to cultivate with the questions we have that's not necessarily going to be resolved immediately. Yes. You know, that's very much a human thing. We want that like, give me the answer now. Yes, yeah. And we all know, well, I will talk about this another time, but it's really just about us wanting to kind of calm that anxiety. Yeah. You know, what the question brought up. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 7:30

I love that for you. I think also the, the one thing I want to just touch on what you mentioned is the whole part of like, you know, kind of societal norms at the moment, like instant gratification. Yeah. So it stems to kind of the quote in what you were saying. We seem to want the answers now. I don't know if our anxiety is heightened in the state we live in and in life at the moment and all the noise and expectations on people. And I'm sure you can speak about that as we go along in this podcast series because obviously it's some of the work that you do do. But for me, just as an individual, I think if the expectations on me as an individual, I think there's some spaces I go like, I can be present, whatever. But I catch myself at times making choices I don't necessarily actively want to make. But because of pressures and stuff, I do. So for me, one word that comes to mind to me that's been very much something I've kind of looked to do some work in is self-awareness, which has been very important to me over the last couple of years, actually. There are times that I'm good at it. in my own interpretation of it. And there are times in the moment that I'm not great at it. And I guess that's part of the experience like we're talking about. Yeah, 100%. So on the premise of that, is there any word to you that stands out really that's been quite, I want to say life-changing, but something that you live by over the last couple of years that really resonates with you?

SPEAKER_00: 8:54

It's probably really simple and most people would know this. Yeah. It's probably presence. Okay. You know, it's at the heart of everything for me. And there's many ways we could go, you know, with that. Yeah. But yeah, it's being present. It's being present in myself. So that means being present in my body, feeling my feelings. Yeah. You know, feeling the aches of like middle age and the changes that you were changing. Yeah. Being present with people, you know, in this conversation, in this room right now. And, yeah, in every other place in my life. And that just to be there in that moment, you know, and be there fully. And that's, I think, the greatest gift, you know. Yeah. Yeah. So presence for me. And I hope that that's something that can come through as we continue our conversations, you know, is to talk about what is, like, what are the different iterations of presence?

SPEAKER_01: 9:51

Yeah. Yeah. That's definitely something that I would like for us to discuss more because I think it's a whole topic on its own. But I love that and I think something that's really stood out for me, like you say, always kind of someone being behind the scenes the last couple of years, it's kind of like a little bit of courage. The word courage comes up. Putting yourself in spaces that you're not comfortable, not knowing the outcome, but still being brave enough to do that at times. And it's super uncomfortable at times. Man, I'm sure you've got your own experiences. for me that has been the biggest lesson go like you know it's not as bad as I thought it was you know you build up all these ideas in your head about like I anticipate the outcome to be like this and you know I'm already imagined before I'm even there it's going to be like this you know this catastrophic thing but then actually when I do it I realize hey this actually wasn't that bad you know that difficult conversation that I genuinely wouldn't want to have and then you realize that you grow to a different level of relationship maybe with that individual whatever that So when you're brave enough to go like, you know, like trust that gut feeling and willing to go into those spaces, there's actually some growth that can happen for people. So yeah, that's another thing for me. Courage has really been quite relevant.

SPEAKER_00: 11:08

Yeah, I think. And so when I think about courage, I think you've got to have courage to be present. It's very interesting. Very true. Because the next word that comes to mind for me is curiosity.

SPEAKER_01: 11:19

Yes.

SPEAKER_00: 11:20

And it also requires courage to be curious because you're kind of, okay, if I explore this like we were talking about the question, being able to just be present with a question and not seek the answer immediately,

SPEAKER_04: 11:32

it

SPEAKER_00: 11:33

takes courage to do that, to be like, okay, I'm going to allow my head to go there, to that place that could be scary or vulnerable.

UNKNOWN: 11:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 11:41

And it's the same with presence because, in truth, what it means is I accept reality exactly as it is, exactly as it is. Everything I'm feeling, everything I'm sensing, that stomach ache, that tightness of my chest, that look I got from the person or sensing their emotion, I'm present with it. And so all of these things require courage. So they all really, I think, kind of link and have this relationship. with each other.

SPEAKER_01: 12:11

I love that. That's quite interesting. That's something that we should also look at. But I love the interrelation part that you're saying, how they're all connected in some other way. And isn't that true of human beings, how we, you know, we built for love and connection. And I really hope that this podcast will be something that shines through. You know, I know we live in a society where it's kind of very much about me, me, me. And the funny part about it is like chasing a hamster wheel because you never quite get that part where I find me, me, me. Because what is me actually. Yes, exactly. But anyway, that's the thing. But I think the important part for me is going a bit more into what we do in our day-to-day life. Something that's quite important to me is linguistics and how language shapes our reality and view of the world, even if that's internal dialogue. So that's very, very important to me. And that's something that will be quite strong in the podcast series too for me. So my day-to-day work, someone that's kind of, I've got a bit of background on psychology and communications, never ventured into psychology as a form of my career, but I've got a massive interest in people development, especially at work as well. So I love the spaces that I've been able to work in, in the corporate environment, seeing how people, you know, do they show up as being authentic? Do they like climatize to the environment? And you kind of, and I think of my own experience of going into environments. So that to me has been kind of my professional environment. Very much people, orientated roles. Even though I'm in the background, I'm a huge observer of human behavior and that allows me insight. So I don't say as much generally, but I observe a lot. And like you say, try and be present. It is something that it's really an area for me that I try and invest a bit more to be more present because I feel that there's so much that we can gain by being more present and being listening to people. And when I say listening, like you're saying, actually being really present, like just now and looking, engaging with someone. So that's been my background generally. You know, Shamila, your background, I mean, maybe just share a bit more with us about that too.

SPEAKER_00: 14:22

So similar to you, I think both of our jobs involve people, you know, and human beings, because I think that's how we both see people. We see the humanity first. And so, yeah, so aside from all the, you know, official stuff that I do, just to say that, you know, I sit with human beings every day, and sometimes it's multiple people at a time, and other times, most of the time, it's probably individual. So I am a registered psychological counselor, and I have an integrative background. Yeah. Yeah. And so that's the place from where I work and mindfulness is a big part of sort of the undertone of my work is just sitting and being present and asking people to just tune in to what's going on right now. And yeah, and so, and yeah. Quite recently, I've added breath work to my practice, and that's part of the somatic experience work we do. And that's been incredibly, like, informative, you know, of just another way to understand sort of patterns. Yes. You know, and what you were saying about human behavior and then how that comes through in In our breath cycles. Yeah. It's quite fascinating to watch that and to actually see how the breath physically manifests in the person's body. Yeah. And note kind of, you know, what is the emotional parallel to this or, you know, what are we working with? And so I do that and I do some energy work as well with clients. And so, again, it's really just about that. engaging with that multidimensionality that I spoke about in the intro. And I think just helping people understand and I think almost just be at peace with that's exactly what the human journey is. And just before we jumped on, we were talking about the evolution of life. And you were saying about coming from the background into the foreground and being actively a part of this conversation. And that's it. And so I often just Say I feel like I facilitate processes. Okay. You know. Ask

SPEAKER_01: 16:57

the right questions.

SPEAKER_00: 16:59

Yeah. And that's honestly how I see it because I feel like I do have a role to play, but, you know, I often want to give back. the kind of the power to the individual in front of me and if you know if any of them are listening they'll know what I'm talking about because some of them will come and be like I need today for you to tell me what to do and I'm like has it ever worked like that yeah Yeah. But I get it. I get it because we just feel like, please just give me something that I can do that's different or like, you know, I feel afraid or I feel panicked. And we work with that. But yeah, there's this evolution happening, you know, with humanity and we are in changing times. Yeah. Like usually changing times and shifting, you know, currents in the world. And I think that's hopeful for the most part. Sure. I know it's very, very difficult to watch what's happening. But yeah. Yeah, there's a hope and so I'm often, I feel, on the side of that, you know. Sure. The optimistic. Yes. You know, I'm connected to the optimistic, the hope in the human being. Yeah. As opposed to the fears and the stuff that, you know, get us to, I think, almost contract. Yes. And withdraw.

SPEAKER_01: 18:14

Sure.

SPEAKER_00: 18:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 18:16

I love that. I can completely resonate with that. You know, like you're saying, there's nothing better than hope, really. I mean, it keeps us going. You know, we're looking forward to something, you know, being hopeful. Yeah, I particularly love, you know, something I read. There's a book that I read recently by someone we'll get into. I won't discuss too much about that. But I think it's about him saying that, like, at a stage, you're saying, like, someone give me the answer today. Like, help me. where he literally says about, you know, just take the courage to, if you say to yourself, for instance, I'm not going to go to gym today if I don't go for an hour. He says it's not an all or nothing perfection thing because perfection doesn't exist, right? He's saying, why don't you just go, if I only have 10 minutes today, let me do the 10 minutes today because then it's building up momentum and also gets your brain into a way of thinking as well. So I think that has been something that I've realized, like coming from kind of my family scenario and background, it's always been about perfection and kind of showing certain things about yourself. And that's been a real struggle for me through my whole journey of life. So trying to realize like unlearning things, and going through that process for me, it's quite daunting at times because it's been your reality for so long and it's second nature, like your habits and

SPEAKER_00: 19:43

stuff. You can't imagine life without that. Yeah,

SPEAKER_01: 19:44

you can't. It's kind of like some safety net for you too, and I'm sure you can explain a bit more about that. But for me, as I say, I think the biggest thing that I've had to learn recently over the last couple of years is unlearning many things that I've been learning or that I've kind of been taught my whole life. And that's been a good journey, but... And I don't think it's a journey that ever ends. It doesn't end. So I think the biggest thing I want to really reiterate is to say that If you come into here to look for instant answers, you're not going to find them here. You're not going to find it. I mean, if it took us 20 years, Sharmila and I, to get to this point, nothing's going to come easy.

SPEAKER_00: 20:20

It's still going. It's still going. It's still going. It's still being fascinated with like, what? I've never had that thought. You know, I've never put that together.

SPEAKER_01: 20:28

And we had an interesting conversation prior to actually going, you know, in this podcast today. But yeah, it just shows you that, you know, we are really here for the journey along with people. And like I said, hopefully Sharmila said, you know, It can provoke some question that takes you down a path to really help you on your journey. But yeah, I think that's, that's something that's like for me, it's unlearning a lot of things that I've learned and really like just finding renewal in certain spaces. Like, you know, like joy, we're speaking about joy early on

SPEAKER_04: 20:58

and,

SPEAKER_01: 20:59

and what that actually means, you know, like I think in its, in its, in a simplistic form, you think it's a very simple, like I must be happy, man. I must be happy. Yeah. But yeah, maybe you just want to share a bit more about joy because you had quite an interesting take on it when you spoke about it before the podcast.

SPEAKER_00: 21:15

I wish I remembered. I always say this to people. They'll go, what did you say? I'm like, I don't know. It's quite profound. I mean, once it's out, it's not going to come back the same way. But I guess if I connect to the essence of it, we were probably talking along the lines of that joy is probably the most vulnerable element experience to have, emotion to experience. Because we do the whole, and we were both sharing stories around how we do the whole foreboding, you know, like I'm in a joyful moment and then immediately there's a, you know, there's a thought that enters that goes, what if this is taken from me? Yeah. You know, or what if this ends or, you know, yeah. And so again, I guess it just brings me back to my answer often feels like the answers in presence, you know. Being in the joy and just feeling the sensations in the body and feeling that moment completely.

SPEAKER_04: 22:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 22:13

Yeah, but the things that give us joy and to, I guess, make space for that.

SPEAKER_01: 22:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 22:20

You know? Yes. Make space for more of that joy.

SPEAKER_01: 22:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 22:23

Yeah, what do you think?

SPEAKER_01: 22:25

Yeah, no, I agree. Joy, I found in a situation this week, actually... I guess I would kind of define as something that's not a comfortable space for me, having to have difficult conversations with people. I mean, you've known me for 20 odd years. So, you know, it was, it was something that I particularly wasn't looking forward to. And I guess no one really does in a way, but you realize that I was speaking to Chamlin and I was just telling her like, you realize that it's, it's not quite as bad as you anticipate it to be once you're done with it. And it actually brings you a lot of joy afterwards to go like, hey, I didn't quite know how this was going to go, but it turned out a lot better than I thought, actually. And that to me is great because joy could mean many different things in different contexts. So yeah, I think that's quite important as well. Shamila, I know this podcast series is going to sort of elaborate over time, but Is there anything that you feel would add value in terms of our conversation today that you would like to leave as a foreword going through to how the series will pan out, thinking about the guests will get on board and what the intention is behind this podcast? Is there any last kind of thought you'd like to leave to say like, for me, like I'd say, for instance, I would really love you to come and join Shamila and I, particularly this is a space where it's really, we'll discuss various human emotions. And hopefully, I love what Shamila said, where she said that it's sometimes the questions that might be asked that lead you down a path more than looking for the answers. Particularly in my life, it's been very true. Sometimes I've wanted answers, but it's the questions that have provoked me to go down certain things to actually find those answers. So I'll leave it as that for me, but I'd love to hear kind of what your thoughts are.

SPEAKER_00: 24:22

Yeah, I think it's definitely along those lines. And I think it's what you were saying earlier. And when I think about presence and why it's meaningful for me in my life, I think we as human beings, we are meaning making, you know, a species that makes meaning out of things.

UNKNOWN: 24:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 24:45

And so it'll mean something different to everybody, you know, who kind of like if a topic strikes, you know, a kind of like interest for them, I think it means something different to everybody. But I would say come and be present with the process of this conversation.

SPEAKER_01: 25:01

Love

SPEAKER_00: 25:01

that. Yeah. And so in my work as well, and for sure in, you know, this experience with you, It's really about the process for me. And I'd want to invite people to come and listen to a process unfold because it literally mimics life. Yeah. You know, I know we think it's about the outcome. Yeah. And of course we want to, you know, have good outcomes and good endings to things or good beginnings. Yeah. But the joy is in the process. Yeah. You know, and that to me is an absolute truth after all. You know, I want to say a lifetime. I know I haven't lived a lifetime yet, but I think we can live lifetimes in years. Yes. But I think out of the many different experiences, you know, the array of experiences that I've had, you know, whether that's loss or challenge or difficulty or parenting or friendships and relationships, all of those things to me, you know, if I step back and I'm able to zoom out and go, okay, yeah, Do we want to rush to that answer or the outcome or can we be present to the process? And I often find for me that the reward is in that. And so it is, I think there's so much out there to listen to, which I think we'll have a topic of that on its own. But yeah, it's to kind of let's share in the process of this human story. Because the human story is about the process of the human. Yeah. You know, and as we said, that evolution.

SPEAKER_01: 26:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 26:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 26:44

I love that. It just reminds you one thing is when I think about you talking about the process, many of us want that eventual outcome. But the road between where it starts and the eventual outcome, that's the character building part. That's uncomfortable. So we all want that instant answers and, you know. But don't we find that life humbles us and when we go through those lessons, we can become those individuals. But like you're saying, Simna, it's a process. So I love that. That's very profound. I love the word of a process. Yeah, I think that kind of encompasses how this human story will play out. But like I said, please come and join us. This is just the introduction. We hope that in some other part today, we've been able to kind of answer a question that And saying like, listen, yeah, this is kind of where I'm at at the moment. I'm maybe in a stage in my life where I'm frustrated. I'm seeking meaning. I don't really know. I know I have this intention to want to do better. Because I think we all have this feeling inside us that we want to kind of be good by nature and doing better. But we just maybe don't have the tools to get there. So I'm hoping that this podcast and the guests and myself and Sharmila, we can hopefully provide that to people. So that's kind of what I want to say. I don't know if you want to add to that, Sharmila.

SPEAKER_00: 28:00

No, I just want to say come and laugh with us and take deep breaths and pause and all of those things because I think that sometimes those questions and sometimes the answers are the things that are quite like, you know, we've got to find the ground again after that because… That's the beauty of it. That's the beauty of insight.

SPEAKER_01: 28:22

Once

SPEAKER_00: 28:23

it's there, the change just inevitably happens within us. And I love that part. I love that part about living and life because, yeah, to just watch the evolution happen and to watch what people do with insights and whatever happens in their lives. And I'm absolutely fascinated by that, not just within my work, but also just, yeah, just watching. Observing human beings in that space. So I'm excited for you all to be along with us. I'm excited to be having these conversations with you and that it is a place. Yeah, it's a safe place for both you and I because that's what our friendship means. But yeah, that it's a place to play. with all these very serious

SPEAKER_01: 29:11

topics. Yeah, I agree.

SPEAKER_00: 29:13

Life is so unserious.

SPEAKER_01: 29:14

Yeah. But thank you for listening to The Human Story today. We hope to bring you much more in the future. But from myself, Lincoln, that's it for today.

SPEAKER_00: 29:24

And from me, Shamila, I send you greetings.

SPEAKER_01: 29:27

Well, that was The Human Story brought to you by Yogd Media. Stay tuned for more on The Human Story.

UNKNOWN: 29:42

so