The Happiest Lives Podcast
The Happiest Lives was designed for Christian women who want to stop being disappointed in their relationships and feel more loved and loving. Here you will learn to think better, feel better, and love better.
This podcast is hosted by Jill M. Lillard, MA LPC, a licensed counselor, and Gottman Certified Couples Therapist. Jill has been helping people manage their minds, process their feelings, and have better relationships for over 25 years.
For application exercises and support in applying the concepts learned on the podcasts, you can access growth tools + Live Coaching inside her cost-effective coaching program: Clarity+Courage. Join and cancel anytime.
For more intensive support, check out Jill's signature coaching program, The Happiest Lives Academy, where you receive all you need to make FIVE transformations in FIVE months. Registration opens once a year.
Discover all her programs and courses at www.myhappyvault.com.
You can email Jill at jill@thehappiestlives.com.
The Happiest Lives Podcast
E1: Who Do You Think You Are?
Knowing who you are is foundational to how you show up in your life and relationships. It defines your worth, value, purpose and what resources you have access to. As a Christian believer you are 100% whole, even as you are still becoming . In this episode I give you 7 suggestions to guide you as you become the woman Scripture says you already are.
If you are ready to become the woman God says you already are, you have to join me in Clarity+Courage, my cost-effective coaching group for Christian women. Learn more and enroll at www.myhappyvault.com/clarityandcourage
Questions? Email Jill directly at Jill@thehappiestlives.com
You are listening to The Happiest Lives Podcast with Jill Lillard. Episode #1.
Hello Everybody! Welcome to our very first episode of The Happiest Lives podcast. I am truly thankful for each of you listening.
As we hang out each week, you will discover that I'm very practical. I like application. Whenever I am listening and learning, I am asking, what do I do with this information?
I like talking about ideas, but what I love is plugging ideas into my life in a practical way. So if that is how you approach life, then you will enjoy this podcast.
My husband loves trivia and will share sports, data, and movie information with me, and my brain is searching for what I am supposed to do with it. I finally realized He is just making a bid to connect, and I don't have to do anything with the information but respond to his bid, understanding that he is turning toward me and sharing his life. I can be curious about why something is interesting to him and so I am all about that even if my brain finds some information to be nothing more than trivia.
All month, we will get very foundational as we talk about Becoming Who You Already Are. You have to know who you are to claim what you have access to. When we walk in the identity God has given us, we have the foundation for everything else, including better relationships.
I heard somebody say once that you aren't who you think you are, and you aren't who other people think you are, but you are who you think other people think you are. And so, who do you think other people think you are? And who are the people that are defining you? Whose opinion matters? Whose thoughts are you paying attention to?
It's so important to ask this because this is the voice that has authority in your life, Your identity is going to speak to your worth, your value, your sense of purpose, and what you think will impact how you spend your time and it is going to create a sense of having or not having. And so it's a really big deal.
I want to highlight five things the Bible tells us about our identity. And these are just a few, a handful, because there's so much.
Genesis 1:27, it tells us that we are created in the image of God. And so this means that you're valuable; you are set apart. You have a divine purpose.
Galatians 3:26, tells us that you are a child of God, meaning you have a special relationship with God as your Father. You are his. And so even though I am humbled by the mystery and majesty of God, I also experience a certain security as the daughter of one who has affection and devotion toward me.
I love the imagery of my father owning the cattle on 1000 hills. He has access to everything and he has promised to take care of me, so that means I have all I need. Being his daughter is such a powerful way to identify yourself.
Psalms 139:14 says, "You are fearfully and wonderfully made." God created you with care and intentionality. And so you have inherent worth and dignity.
In II Corinthians 5:17, we learn that we are a new creation in Christ. So if you have accepted Jesus as your Savior, you're a new person with a new identity who has a purpose.
In I Corinthians 6:19, we're told you are a temple of the Holy Spirit. So if Jesus is your Savior, God his very self dwells within you, and He empowers you to live a life pleasing to him.
These are just a few examples of how the Bible describes who you are as a person. Ultimately, your identity is rooted in your relationship with Christ and understanding his love for you.
Even though we've been made new, there's still this battle that's going on between the flesh and the spirit. He's transforming us every day by renewing our minds even as we live in mortal bodies. And so, we are invited to participate in the process of our redemption as God gives us free will.
There are things that we do that hinder the work of the Spirit in our lives. For instance, we can build walls by holding on to anger, bitterness, or resentment. We have to turn toward Jesus when we feel these things and be willing to trust Him with our biggest hurts.
Because becoming is a process, I want to give you some suggestions for becoming who he says you already are.
The first thing is just being able to identify and reflect on the truths that scripture tells you about your identity. I shared some of those with you, but there are many more.
You can know the truth about your worth and your relationship with the Lord, but you want to be able to reflect, recite and access those truths so that you are living them out. When you see yourself as He does, you aren't always thinking about who you are, you just are. And when you just are, your eyes will be focused on the amazingness of God and loving other people.
The second suggestion is to shine a light on your struggles. This will show us what you are actually believing. You will know because your actions follow your thoughts and feelings.
Be honest about what reality you're living in. Are you living like an orphan, when the reality is that you are the daughter of a king?
When we're able to turn on the lights and get real with ourselves, as opposed to just trying to be who we think we're supposed to be, then we're going to keep coming to God as we are, over and over again. This is how we are transformed. It starts with honesty and willingness.
Another suggestion is to be yourself. Just be you. God didn't create us all exactly alike. And so don't try taking on the role of somebody else.
It would be super boring and dysfunctional if we were all the same person. God has given you a special role in the body.
I love how Scripture tells us that we are the body of Christ- one unit that is made up of many parts. So just like a physical body has many parts that form one body, so is the body of Christ. Christ is the head of this body, and when we do the part he has given us, we build up the whole body, living with purpose.
So if you're a foot, you don't want to start trying to do the job of a hand. And if you're a knee, you don't want to complain and wish you were the stomach. Okay, we each have a special part. And as we do our part, we're going to bring value, because each part is valuable and no part is more valuable than the other. Each part has worth and contributes to edifying the whole and glorifying the Lord.
Another suggestion for becoming who you are is to look at what you're passionate about. What are the things that interest you? What excites you? This is part of your personality. It's the way God has designed you. And so knowing the things that interest you, the things that you're passionate about, that is a great way to be who God has made you and find your role and your gifts in the body.
I also want to encourage you to feel good in your physical body and in your mind so that you can show up and fulfill your calling. Being able to take care of your body and your mind by getting sleep, eating healthy, exercising, and getting movement, are all ways that we can become who we already are.
So in closing, your identity is established by the Lord. You can't make yourself more worthy. You can't earn his love. You already have all you need. Your life has meaning and purpose.
Stepping into this identity, it's a process. And until Heaven, we're not going to arrive at our destination, but the process is a relationship with Jesus, the one who loves us. He knows us, and he desires for us to know and love Him. Day by day, he wants to fill more of us so that we can reflect more of him. This takes consistency, patience, and grace.
This is our life. Like Paul, let's consider it all joy as we watch his goodness singing over us in all the things that come our way. And more and more, we can become who he says we already are.
Thanks for listening. Let's talk again next week.