How Introverts Can ROCK at Networking - Ep 69

How Introverts Can ROCK at Networking! with Shawna Ramsey

Connect with Shawna:
https://www.linkedin.com/in/shawna01/

Originally aired Thursday, April 16, 2020.

To see the list of upcoming interviews, visit:
https://www.mellermarketing.com/upcoming-live-interviews

WATCH on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RnSfMU_ihFY

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My name is Brenda Meller. I'm a LinkedIn coach, consultant, speaker, and author. My company is Meller Marketing and I help business professionals get a bigger slice of the LinkedIn pie.

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Transcript

How Introverts Can ROCK at networking!

[00:00:00] Hey, my friends, I'm going to take you back to 2020. This is an interview I did with my good friend, Shauna Ramsey, and the topic is still relevant today. It's actually ironic because back then we were doing a lot more networking. virtually, but we are now back in person and this is a really great conversation I had with Shauna and she gave some tips about how introverts can rock at networking.

So I do hope that you enjoyed this episode. If you're an introverted heart like I am, I know you're going to get some great takeaways just like I did. And do be sure to look up Shauna because she's an amazing networker still to this day. I hear about her. From people I know, and we both say, Hey, I know Shawna.

She's that kind of person. I hope you enjoyed the episode. 

Brenda Meller: It's Brenda Meller with Meller Marketing. I am so excited to be here today. I've actually invited my friend, Shauna Ramsey, to be joining me today. We're going to talk about how introverts can rock at networking.

Hey, Shauna, how are you?

Shawna Ramsey: I'm great. for having [00:01:00] me, Brenda. I'm so excited to be on. 

Brenda Meller: Yes, I'm so excited to have you on. And a little birdie told me that today is your birthday, Shauna. Is this true information?

Shawna Ramsey: It is true. I have to admit it. 

Brenda Meller: So did you know when you selected this day? I mean you had to have known when you picked this day that this was your birthday and this is gonna be the show date that we do, right?

Shawna Ramsey: So I did, and I always try and do something new on my birthday and since we're social distancing and being apart, I was racking my brain how I was going to do that and you came forward and said, Hey, I'd love to have you on the show and, I just was like, okay, this is a perfect match. I'm going to force myself to do this.

I was flattered, but at the same time, terrified when you asked. 

Brenda Meller: Oh, no, really? I was shocked to hear that because you don't strike me as the kind of, I was like, Oh, she'd be perfect. Cause she's a great networker. Come on on the show.

Shawna Ramsey: No. So I am an introvert. I identify as an introvert. And I really push myself to get out and network, and I have techniques that I use in order to do [00:02:00] that.

Brenda Meller: Awesome. So Shauna, let's get started with this conversation and, what I want to do is I want to kind of tell people a little bit about our background, how we got to know each other. So so the year was 2018, right? And I'm actually going to pull a picture up on screen to show you guys this. And I was asked to speak at one of my first conferences outside of Metro Detroit by Inforum.

And on screen right now, you'll see a picture of myself on the left, Shawna in the middle, and then the CEO and president of Inforum, Terry Barclay. And Terry and I were presenting about networking. I was kind of focusing on LinkedIn tips and, and Terry was talking about networking your way through throughout your career.

And you know, it was for me, it was like a pretty big deal at this conference. I was kind of nervous, but we had a lot of fun and Shauna came up afterwards. And I just remember her level of energy and enthusiasm, her professionalism. She was just talking how much she loved this session.

And then she's like, can I get a picture with the two of you? And I was like, oh my gosh, somebody is getting a picture. [00:03:00] And it was like, yeah, that's kind of cool. And, and now I look at this picture, Shauna, and this was now. Gosh, going on two years ago now, right? Because it was, was it, what day was it? Do you remember?

Shawna Ramsey: February 28th. 

Brenda Meller: Of 2018. Yeah. But that's, I mean, that seems like that was a year ago. No, that was two years ago. But I'm an introvert and I remember you know, when Shauna first picked the topics about how introverts can rocket networking, I'm like, Why are you picking that? You're not an introvert.

Cause she came up to me at this conference and she's taking pictures and she's interacting and she's like, no, I do. But, but guys, any of you who are entrepreneurs, self employed you can probably relate to this. I look at myself in that picture now, and I think about where I was mentally. I think about the level of confidence I had in myself and my business and I'm just, I'm just so much further ahead in the two years and it's thanks to people like Shauna because at, at that event, Shauna came up and we were chitty chatting and, you know, networking and then she's like, hey, you got to [00:04:00] check out this other group.

We were both members in forum, you know, we were both affiliated with that events, but she's like, there's this other group that's coming to Metro Detroit right now. And it's called Together Digital. And I'm like, gosh, what's that? And she's like, well, it's all, it's all, it's an all women's organization focused on women in digital.

And we're just getting started and you've got to come out. And of course, I looked up the information and went out to the first meeting and Elena Scherer, the founder was there and she was, you know, just. I mean, I was just, my mind was blown about this group and I joined right away. But Shawna has been for me, one of those connectors throughout the past two years, you know, introducing me to people shouting out on social media and I see her at events and she's always welcoming and friendly.

And, I can't tell you how many times people say, Shawna told me to connect with you or Shawna suggested. So, so let's talk about this, Shawna. I mean, the shock I had with this topic, you said, How can introverts rock at networking? And I was like, you're not an introvert. You're an introvert, Shauna! Is that [00:05:00] true, 

Shawna Ramsey: shauna?

I am an introvert, yes. And it took a while for me to figure it out. Like, honestly, the first inkling I had, I took a Myers Briggs test, and I was, I think, INFP if I remember correctly. But, like, I took it a couple times, and I would occasionally dip into E. So that's a key. And we'll talk about that later.

It's, I mean, growing up, even I have an identical twin sister, which I think, you know, she was always sort of the leader the one who was giving directions. And I sort of. It stayed back a bit. I wasn't the first one to go up and introduce myself to someone. And then I also have a younger sister and she is an actress.

So it's an actor extrovert out, you know, out there all the time, easy in front of crowds. So I definitely identified as an introvert. And in fact I mentioned to my [00:06:00] family that I was going to talk, talk on this topic. And my mom was the first one to say, Oh yeah, I totally see that you were, yeah, I always kept it myself.

I, I was a daydreamer. I mean, they, they would talk about that a lot. Like I would, you know, write or draw or, but I was most happy when I was sort of on my own. 

Brenda Meller: Yeah. And, and being an introvert, you know, I always tell people it's not a character flaw. It's not like we're, we're bad people and we're shy and we're never going to be successful in life.

It's that we recharge ourselves. Not just because she's doing it, but because we're embarrassed sometimes after we're out in public and being with a lot of people, we need quiet time. And quiet time is how we recharge, but it doesn't mean that we can't rock at events, right? Yeah. So how have you been? You know, I guess let's, let's talk about this.

I know how How have you been able to be successful at networking events? And I have to say, Sean, I mean, when you go to an event, I feel like you're the life of the party. You're fluttering around, you're introducing people. I mean, when I met you at International Women's Day, you [00:07:00] came right up and you're talking.

And I was like, it's very overwhelming. There's strangers here. Do I talk to them? But I mean, how are, are you nervous when you go to events or, and, and what, what approaches do you take when you're at events? 

Shawna Ramsey: So very nervous when I go to events, but it's getting better over time. Like anything you do, the more you do it the more comfortable you become.

And I'm sure you feel the same way. But for me what I found was key or what really, change the game for me to, so to speak, was I actually gamified the experience. Really? Yeah. Tell me about this. So and for me, I hadn't like done anything formal but it was always like. I established a point system.

So basically meeting someone was one point, connecting was two points. So that would be like sending a personalized link, because I know it's important to send a personalized one. And then throwing your tips in 

Brenda Meller: there. You are a good [00:08:00] student. 

Shawna Ramsey: Three points would be engaging with that person after you connect.

So commenting to them, sending a personalized message afterwards, asking them questions about themselves, just really connecting. So you can do that now in the virtual world. For example, here you could do it. And I also, when I was going to specific events, I tried to set bonus items to like asking a question during a speaker Q and a, and that would be five points.

So that was like a big. You know, point value, introducing yourself to a group of people, you know, how the little clicks sort of forms the, like, end of the click and actually introducing yourself to the group. That's huge for an introvert. And then asking someone that you just met to introduce you to more people at the event.

So those were all sort of things that I, I did for myself on [00:09:00] notepad on the note app. Yeah, that's my question. 

Brenda Meller: I mean, you've got, is this, is this like an app you found or did you just create this yourself? No, 

Shawna Ramsey: just myself, like going into notes. So I would know I'm going to an event. I would set my, you know, I have my point structure, but then what are the bonus things?

And just establish it that way, but you can take it up a notch and part of. Things that I was thinking about even for this session was how to encourage people to take it up a notch. So to take it up a notch and formalize it more, I would outline your target goals. And so that could be for the month, it could be for the quarter, it could be for the week.

However, you know, whatever time duration you want to do outline your target goals. And then you could also determine some type of reward. So for me, the reward was always outdoing myself at the next event. When you're competing, 

Brenda Meller: I mean, that was my next question. You're giving yourself points. Yeah. [00:10:00] What do you do with these points?

Are you, is this, I mean, is it just like I'm competing myself? You know, what was my, it's kind of like when I go to the gym, like how many miles did I walk today on the treadmill or whatever? So I'm like, okay, today I walked 1. 25, next week I walk 1. 3, so I feel better. Is it, is that, you're kind of just competing against yourself mainly when you're doing this?

Shawna Ramsey: For me, that's how it's always worked, and that was enough motivation, but for some people and it's, it's, you know, rewards are big motivators. For some people it would probably, Behoove them to set milestones and then set rewards like that trigger that trigger back to your individual interests. So maybe you love reading books.

So you say like if I make it to 250 points i'm gonna Go on Amazon and buy five books. That's just an example. 

Brenda Meller: Maybe you could like, get a slice of pie. 

Shawna Ramsey: There you go. Yeah. Yeah. So that's, you know, determining the reward. And then I thought, well, what else [00:11:00] could people do? Like what else would help? Sort of keep them on track.

Brenda Meller: Ronna, can I interrupt you? Because I want to ask a question. I know there's many people that are watching and I'm, I'm curious of two questions. I'm going to look at my, I've got my phone, guys. So I'm going to look down at my phone in a second and see your comments here. But I'm, I'm curious how many people that are watching this right now.

Introvert. So if you can comment below and say, yes, I'm an introvert, and again, Shauna and I are introverts. So this is not a character flaw. This is just a personality characterization. So comment below and let us know if you are an introvert. And then second, since we're talking about gamifying, you know, the, the system.

What things would you suggest we could do as introverts to give ourselves points? So, for example, for me, I love coffee, so when I go to an event, I might give myself a point for talking to someone while getting my coffee. Would that count, Shauna? Yes, that would count. 

Shawna Ramsey: That's a great one. That's a great idea.

Somebody write that down. 

Brenda Meller: You know, guys, jot your comments below and, and like, think about what could we [00:12:00] give ourselves points for at networking events. And I'll look at those in a second, Shauna, but I'll let you continue with the discussion. Yeah. So, 

Shawna Ramsey: I think you might know this but I joined an accountability group.

During this time period, this while we're working from home and everything else. And the group I joined is Jan Griffiths group that I found out about on LinkedIn. And Brenda, thank you so much for introducing me to her podcast. It's, it's wonderful. And I was fangirling her. So when I saw her offer for an accountability clinic, I was like, sign me up.

Yes. So, but so accountability has really been on my brain lately. So the fourth thing I would kind of encourage people to do is establish a scorecard to track your progress. So something a little more formal, you could keep it at home in your office, but you know, you can definitely keep it on your notepad on your phone.

And that's a great way when you're out networking to track and not make it really.[00:13:00] Known to other people that you're doing it. Yeah, 

Brenda Meller: because I would have never, like you, you, you're like, when we first were talking, we did a prep call a couple days ago and we were talking about this and you're like, I gamify it.

And I'm like, I'm familiar with gamifying. I'm like, how do you gamify being an introverted network? And when she was explaining to me, I was like, wow, that's brilliant. Cause I've never seen you like, You talk to me and you're like, hold on a second. You know, going in, you're not like doing that while you're at the session.

And I would never know because it's not like I've seen sometimes when it's a salesperson at the event, I don't have a stack of cards, but they come to an event and they're like handing out business cards, like 20 before they leave. And it's so obvious because. They're like, here you go, here you go, here you go.

And then they walk to the next batch of people and they don't even talk to you. And you're like, throwing the card away. It's a very, I mean, you, you, you make a goal to do a, to have a conversation or meet someone, but you're. They're completely invested in that conversation. I can tell because you're, you know, you're very involved with those conversations.

Shawna Ramsey: Yeah. And then the other thing I [00:14:00] would encourage from like an accountability perspective think about occasionally meeting with a trusted friend. So, like, I mean, your friends definitely have different things they have goals towards, I'm sure and you can meet and just sort of compare notes and your thing that you can, you can bring your little scorecard with you and talk about, you know, your results and achievements towards networking and kind of meeting your major milestones.

So it's been great for me because originally when I go to events. I might talk to the person next to me, might, because I was so shy. But you know, once I started gamifying things, because growing up, especially as a twin, we were very competitive. So it's in my nature, it's in my DNA to compete. Now I'm competing with myself, but I'm still competing.

So for me it was really natural and I just, I loved it. So now when I go to events, I'll meet 10 people, [00:15:00] 20 people, you know, it's. I can't even remember the time when I just went to an event and met one person. Like that's so far, far, far away from where I'm at right 

Brenda Meller: now. So when you go to an event, Shauna, are you like, for me, I feel most comfortable finding somebody I know first.

And if I don't, then I look for somebody else who looks like me, who's kind of meandering and isn't part of the, one of those little quick conversations that are happening. But, but what do you do when you first walk into an event? Are you finding someone, you know, or are you. Are you already on your point card there and 

Shawna Ramsey: working towards some goals?

So I definitely warm up. And what I typically do is when I'm in my car, I sort of remind myself, like here, you know, here's what I'm doing to gain the points. Here's my, you know, objectives for this event. Like I sort of, and I take a few minutes and I just like relax because it's really important for me to kind of relax and have that peaceful moment before I walk into a networking event, because they can be chaotic, like when you're [00:16:00] registering and doing all those things.

But I also do look for friendly faces. And you are a friendly face I look for definitely at forum events. Sandy, who we both know, Sandy Harvey, she's another one I will go and look for because you guys are so warm and welcoming and I feel you know me very well. So yeah, hug from you guys before I kind of go in and start the networking game really helped.

Okay. 

Brenda Meller: I, I was trying to look for, I had a picture that I took of myself and I, I, Posted it on Instagram recently and it was like me and my car and I think I put it in stories because I can't find it in my Instagram for Meller Marketing, but it was, it was me and my car and I was walking into this was the Sterling Heights Chamber, Macomb Chamber put on a really big event every year, it's the Governor's Luncheon and this was like literally, Not too long ago, it was like, right, I think it was like, January or February, but it was right before everything started happening, and there was still a lot of people, there's probably a thousand people at this event, and I took a picture of myself sitting in my car, because it was like, it was a major event, I hadn't been to [00:17:00] a large event with that many people in such a long time, and my heart started racing, and I was getting nervous, and I took a picture of myself in the mirror of my car, you know, I was parked at the time, and I posted it on Instagram, going, I am freaking out right now, you guys, like, I had to walk into this event, And I see a lot of people from my former lives when I, when I go to these major events and my organization used to sponsor and we were, you know, a big name and now it's like just me walking in.

But I remember feeling very, you know, it was very intense and then I walked in and I, I found people I knew and I was fine afterwards, but I can, I can picture you like in your car, like Shawna. You're gonna do this, you got to earn to wait 

Shawna Ramsey: 100%. Yeah. 

Brenda Meller: So then tell me what happens after the event? I mean, do you, do you book time, quiet time after an event to kind of recharge?

Or what, what is your, what is your go-to plan? So 

Shawna Ramsey: I have to and I feel like we've talked a little bit about this because I am just like spent after an event like I have, and [00:18:00] a lot of times too, I'm really bad at small talk, which is also something that introverts tend to like not be the best at small talk.

Brenda Meller: I would never have guessed that because I think you're awesome at small talk. I feel like, I feel like the way that you approach it, you're always relatable. Like I do this sometimes too. I'm like this, I feel awkward being at this event and I don't know anybody. Do you guys feel like that too? And I feel like your approach, you're very authentic with it.

It's not like, so did you see the stock market today, Bob? You know? 

Shawna Ramsey: So I used to keep, and I don't really need it anymore because like I said, if you keep practicing, if you keep, you know, going out and networking, you feel more and more comfortable, but I need to have a list of just icebreaker questions. on my notepad, on my phone that I could refer to.

And, you know, I'd have maybe three or four of them memorized before I go into an event. Do 

Brenda Meller: you remember any of them? Can you share them with us now? Just 

Shawna Ramsey: sometimes, like if I was waiting in the buffet line, something as [00:19:00] simple as like, so how did you hear about this event? Or, you know, what interesting thing have you heard thus far Speakers, things like that are really easy icebreakers and it gets people talking.

Do not ask questions that are like, yes, no questions. Okay, so stick. You have to be open-ended questions, it's really important. And there are, I mean, honestly. You know, Google icebreaker questions, and there's easily lists and lists of questions that come up and then you can customize them. So I'm a believer of never create something from scratch.

Google it and then customize it for your own use. Yeah, 

Brenda Meller: I love it. That's a really great question. So I'm gonna take a moment, Shauna, just to kind of look and see. We've already got, this post is already blowing up all over, all over LinkedIn land. Everybody's watching the post and seeing what's happening here.

And I'm, I'm going to remind you guys to, if you happen to be watching this on Facebook. com slash Meller Marketing, you can actually leave a comment on, [00:20:00] in, in Facebook, and I can actually pull your comment up on screen. Hint, hint. So here's one from Chris Garrity who's saying, Hi, Ben. Hi, Chris. But if anyone else, if you'd like to wish Shawna a happy birthday, I can put that up on screen.

If you are an introvert, you have tips that you'd like us, I'd like to share, you can go on Facebook, but I'm going to read through a couple of the comments that are coming into LinkedIn right now. So, Shauna, so far, 26 reactions, 52 comments, 184 views of this video. I think this is like the, the highest so far of any, So I told you before the show, I'm like, this is going to be a popular topic because I, I strongly believe, do you think so too, Shauna, that there are more introverts than there are 

Shawna Ramsey: extroverts out there?

I do. And honestly, I think there definitely is a spectrum and you can deviate within the spectrum. So like you can go to a place, an introvert can go to a place where they're feeling extroverted. And vice versa, an extrovert can go to a place [00:21:00] where they're feeling introverted. So it's not like a cut and dry, like you're an introvert.

That's it. You're always introvert. It, it definitely, there's a spectrum that you can 

Brenda Meller: run. Yeah, absolutely. And I think some people, you know, I, at certain times of, of the day and certain points in my career and certain points, you know, where I'm feeling in the mood wise that day, I feel like I'm more.

Introverted versus extroverted and et cetera. But yeah, definitely definitely a range there. So I'm going to pull this one off of screen here for a second and I'm just going to give some shout outs. First of all, for those of you who are watching and we've got many, many happy birthdays coming in here.

Jan Grimace is watching us, Shauna. So look at that. Hey Jan, how are you? Jan? Hey, could you drop your link to the podcast on LinkedIn in a comment? So if people want to. Listen to that. They can link over. And then Jan, also, if you're still running that Accountability Clinic, could you put the link in there?

If not, you know, just let us know that as well. Joyce Hayek Rouse is saying happy birthday. [00:22:00] Kelly Belleville says happy birthday, Shawna. Hi, Kelly. Catherine Viggenhoe says happy birthday. 

Shawna Ramsey: Oh, hi Catherine. 

Brenda Meller: Lisa Finateri. Is that one of your co workers at Merkle? Yes, 

Shawna Ramsey: she is, she is. Hi Lisa. 

Brenda Meller: And then we have Carolyn Sauer, Tracy Apatera, I might be mispronouncing that, I apologize Tracy.

We have Salome, we have Laura Schwartz. Schwartz, excuse me Jennifer Supal Gambino, joining us from Tampa. So we're outside of Michigan now, we've got Diane Hunter on the line. We have Brenna, who's from Michigan at home. Vanessa says, hi, Erin Kamenoff. Hi, Erin. Nice to see you. And let's Jola, Vanessa Moon.

Hello, ladies. Sofian says happy birthday. Lots of happy birthdays for you out here, Shawna. Oh, guys. I 

Shawna Ramsey: really appreciate that. 

Brenda Meller: Olga said, Olga's a fellow Detroit Together [00:23:00] digital member, Olga Kovtun, and Olga says we look like sisters, Shawna. I think we could play that one off, right? Yeah, sure. Claudette is joining us from Rochester Hills.

Let's see, Andrea Mill loves their point system, Shawna. Oh, great. 

Shawna Ramsey: It makes a difference. 

Brenda Meller: We also have Brian Lancaster, Graham Moore, Angela Spring who says Angela says she is an introvert. Then we have Michelle Romig. Lots of people saying, yes, I am an introvert. Bruce says sorta. Okay, Bruce, you're probably one of those.

You flip depending on the situation. Catherine's an extrovert. So Catherine, how about this point system? Do you have any, you have any thoughts on it? Is this something that you could contribute? Cause maybe you as an extrovert. might have some tips that we as introverts could 

Shawna Ramsey: use. We have 

Brenda Meller: Jean Shovlin.

Alison is Myers Briggs, INTJ. Hey, you guys that are watching, do you remember what the, what does each of the letters stand [00:24:00] for? Can someone drop that in comments? Cause I've heard like, E N F G A B C D E F G. I don't know what the letters are. I'm like E N T J Q P. I don't know what those mean. If you know what they are, drop them in the comments.

I'm kind of curious. Angela's tip for networking, Shawna, she says, Arrive nice and early when it's not too busy. Seems less intimidating that way. Is that something you do too, 

Shawna Ramsey: or? I try to, I really do. And she's dead on because then you can kind of look through the room, understand the layout of the room, really understand where you could maybe network to, and knowing your boundaries helps as well, at least for me.

Brenda Meller: Okay, awesome. And I'm throwing Mavita's comment up on screen. You know, Mavita, Shauna, I feel like you guys should know each other. We probably 

Shawna Ramsey: have run into each other. 

Brenda Meller: Mavita Burrows, and she's a super heavy networker too. I have to think Mavita's an extrovert. Because I don't, I can't, I can't imagine a seasoned introvert, but I could be wrong, because I thought you were an extrovert, and here I am, you know.

Shawna Ramsey: Well, and I sort of identify, and we can talk [00:25:00] more about this too, as an extroverted introvert, which is a thing. I think you posted actually an article about that, Brenda. Yes, I 

Brenda Meller: did. It's I, I have my phases. So when I'm speaking in front of a group, I'm always very quiet beforehand, I get a little frazzled, and then as soon as I speak, I'm fine.

I'm feeling extroverted and then afterwards I kind of have that quiet time, you know, being needed. Let's get a couple more comments here and then we'll get back into the conversation. So we have Reham who says, I'm an introvert, but when I tell people that they say, what? No, you're not. But they didn't know the effort I had to put in to go to talk to them.

So, The Shauna Ramsey Model of Networking. Absolutely 

Shawna Ramsey: same, totally relate, 

Brenda Meller: yeah. Yeah, and let's see Shauna, a question for you. This is from David Riddle, and David is asking, How do you keep track of, of points at events? So he may not have heard the explanation a little bit earlier, or I guess, I guess the good question here is too, because how are you keeping track?

Do you like sit in your car afterwards? [00:26:00] So 

Shawna Ramsey: I usually have, so I'll have the different points, like what I'm valuing, the different points already in my notepad. And so I can just like walk away for a few minutes and I just usually put like a strike underneath each one. So then I can count them up later.

It doesn't take a lot of time. I mean, people are always sort of looking down at their phones at events, even though you shouldn't occasionally. So that's sort of how I do it. And then I get back into my car and then I can sort of tally and see how it is. 

Brenda Meller: Ah, so the next time I see Shawna at an event.

What I think she's doing is checking her email. She's actually 

Shawna Ramsey: telling her points up guys. 

Brenda Meller: You know, that makes, it makes me think of an idea too, Shawna. Have you ever thought about, I know you're active on Instagram. Have you ever thought about creating like a graphic and posting it on Instagram of your point system?

Shawna Ramsey: I mean, I haven't, but I think that's a great idea. 

Brenda Meller: Yeah. And then you could pull it up and then all of us could find it. And I'm [00:27:00] like, how can I get this from her? Well, I'll ask her to post it. 

Shawna Ramsey: Yeah, no. And I mean, I've actually thought about that, like making a really cool graphic or something, even to like blow up and put at home.

Like, like I said, to keep myself accountable. So, yeah, I like it. 

Brenda Meller: Hamel says networking events can really compliment LinkedIn networking. And Shauna, I think you do this really, really well. Again, when I meet people at events, you know I can't tell you how many times I've met someone And we'll get into conversations and I'll say, what brought you here?

And they'll say, Shauna Ramsey invited me on LinkedIn and she told me to come here. And I'm like, is she here today? And they're like, no, but I'm like, you, you do such a good job. I think of both before the event reaching out to people and especially with Detroit Together Digital. You'll find like wherever we're holding that event and you'll find, you'll do kind of a geography search of people in Southfield or Farmington or, or Troy or Detroit and you'll, you'll say, Hey, it looks like you might live or [00:28:00] work in the Farmington Hills area.

We're meeting at this place. Come on out. And then it sounds like you're also doing the post event follow up and connecting with people too. 

Shawna Ramsey: Yes, and I absolutely love doing that. So it's really helped me to meet people because I am more comfortable communicating online than I am in person. Yeah. And probably because I am an introvert.

Brenda Meller: Yeah. Again, I'm like, I hear these things and I'm like, no, you're no, no, no, no, no. You're like, you're personable. You're like the life of the party block. It's in a way too. Like you guys, if you see Shauna at an event, she's so approachable. And I, I've even seen when you work the room. You help to make people feel comfortable if they're not in a conversation you might be like hey Sheila come and meet Brenda Let's talk.

We're both members of Troy chamber or whatever and I feel like you're so inclusive I just, you know, I adore you, Shawna. I really do. Aww, 

Shawna Ramsey: same here. 

Brenda Meller: So let's see who else. We have Rick Catron joining [00:29:00] us. Hello, Rick. Rick, actually, funny backstory, Shawna. I was at a, an event for MICPA. And I was doing this thing where I literally had my phone up on a tripod and I kept videotaping myself.

And I would hit like video and then I would step back and do a take and then I'd stop it and play it. And it was, you know, in between the show seminars and Rick saw me and he came up, he's like, do you need help? And he ended up holding the camera. So I didn't have to keep walking back and forth. But that's 

Shawna Ramsey: a good point too, as an introvert, like look around the room and see who might.

Be feeling maybe some of the feelings you're feeling and maybe they're displaying them. I mean, you need help that they're feeling uncomfortable and then try and like put yourself in their shoes and go up to them and talk to them. Make them feel more 

Brenda Meller: comfortable. Yeah, people are saying they love the realness of our conversation here, Shauna.

We're being raw and real. Here's an icebreaker. This is from Jan Griffiths, and I'll invite you guys, if you have other icebreaker [00:30:00] questions you use at events, to drop those in the comments too. Jan will ask people, what's your story? And her thought is, you know, people love to talk about themselves.

So so really good, good tip there. So, so let's, let's kind of move along here. So, you know, talking more about introverts and how they can, you know, kind of do really well and rock at networking. Shawna, any, any other tips or pointers for us to think about? 

Shawna Ramsey: I would say spend some time like each week thinking about different ways that you can network.

So you made some great points about how I network that maybe not everyone else would, would like immediately think about. For me, I started really going great guns into networking through volunteering. Ooh, okay. What I did was I am part of PMI, so Project Management Institute. And I'm part of the Huron Valley chapter.

I really wanted to meet people and get more [00:31:00] involved, but I knew I was very shy. Their meetings, there's probably 150 to 200 people at their meetings. So I kept thinking, well, how can I get involved where I would feel comfortable? And that's how I became a speaker chair. That was my first speaker chair position.

And I had a purpose, like, I had a reason to reach out to whomever I wanted to, because I was trying to slot speakers. So for me, that was a great way to kind of step forward and start more actively networking. And I loved it too, because, you know, volunteering is so important. And it, there definitely is organizations out there for everyone, in my opinion.

You have to be willing to kind of take a chance and explore those. 

Brenda Meller: Yeah, that's a really good point. And I don't know if you know Roy Sexton. Do you know Roy? So 

Shawna Ramsey: I met Roy at one of the Inform events. I think actually I was sitting at a table with [00:32:00] you and I heard this amazing laugh behind me. And that is how I met Roy.

Did you guys talk? I, I think we talked briefly. I mean, I see him online all the time and I'll comment on his posts and everything else, but yeah, that was what, like what I remember about Roy when I met him. A great laugh. So 

Brenda Meller: Roy and I we actually did we, we've got a live coming up at the end of this month and we're talking about, you know, being introverts too.

But when I I think when I first, I don't know if it was when I first met him, it was at an Inform Annual meeting and he and I were talking and I feel like we interacted with each other so much online. I don't remember if that was the first meeting or if it was the, you know, we had an in depth conversation in person.

And he and I were talking and we were just talking about how I was like, gosh, I always feel like these events are so, I feel so, Awkward. You know, I walk up to people and I'm like, I'm having to break into conversations. And I'm like, I'm an introvert. And he's like, you're not an introvert. He's like, I'm an introvert.

I'm like, oh, you are not an introvert. Like, there's [00:33:00] no way. And I said, Rory, you gotta come out. And, and he did a talk at Inform Troy talking about, you know, introverts and some of the techniques he is talking about are similar to you. And he, he would say, as an introvert, you know, give yourself permission to find a role at an event.

So be the greeter. That is welcoming people into the door, handing out programs, checking people in at the registration desk, helping set up, you know, whatever, facilitating, getting people to the stage and back, but when you have a purpose, then some of that heat comes off of you, you know, in terms of like the pressure and the anxiety you get, and he had a couple of other great tips, but in addition to his laugh, Shauna, if you are ever looking for a speaker, Roy is this, this, the guy to book, and he dances, he sings, he entertains, and he is such a great marketer, too.

If you book him, he will promote your event everywhere, so a little plug for Roy Sexton, Hello, introvert, but echoing Shauna's tips on you know, Giving [00:34:00] Yourself a Role. And PMI, you know, there's a lot of great professional organizations out there, and if you're not already involved in a professional organization, you know, right now, I think just about every group is doing online virtual events, right, Shawna?

Yes. Yeah. 

Shawna Ramsey: The Zoom rooms, and. And it's amazing, because that's a great way too, that you can kind of see, will this organization be a fit? Are these people my people? You know, do I feel comfortable? Because that, those are all things that are really important, especially when an introvert is sort of looking at getting involved.

Brenda Meller: Yeah, and I, and I've been to events, and I'm sure you have as well, Shawna, like. I'm like, I get there and I'm like the, the group, I understand it's gelling pretty well with itself, but I just don't feel like it's a place for me and that, and that's okay. You know, you've got to find groups. Yeah. Yeah, so let's see a couple other, I asked for any other icebreaker questions.

And Jan, thank you. She has dropped in her podcast link. There you go. For the accountability [00:35:00] clinic just message me on LinkedIn. We start at 630 a. m. 630 a. m. Like in the a. m., in the time before the alarm goes off when we're working from home a. m. 

Shawna Ramsey: And I, up until today, I had not missed a day since she started the accountability clinic.

She said to me, she said, you know, it's your birthday. You should take the day off. Cause I, I took the day off of work and she's like, take it off from accountability clinic. And I miss it. I miss accountability. Like, I wish I would have said, no, I'm going to come. I'm going to, it's nice. That's nice, Jan, for the offer, but 

Brenda Meller: no.

So do you have to come to it every day or can you come just like once? 

Shawna Ramsey: So you can come as often as you want, but I mean, it's addictive, like one time you, once you've been to one, you want to come to more and just to kind of not to get off topic a little bit so what Jan does is she [00:36:00] has you say out loud like one personal goal and one professional goal.

And then what, how would you describe your mood? Like what is your feeling for the day? So one word to describe that. And we all go through and then the next morning we report back and we say if we met you know, our personal and professional goals from the day before. 

Brenda Meller: That is hardcore. Like six, how many people are in this group at six 30 in the morning?

Oh, I think we've 

Shawna Ramsey: like, it's been six, seven, eight. I mean, there's been, there's been a decent attendance. And I have been so happy that I got in right at the beginning because it is, it has made a world of difference, especially right now. Because we're social, social distancing and we can't, you know, it's hard.

You want to keep that positive momentum and that, you know, that bounce in your step during the day. And that 6. 30 meeting does it for me. Let me tell you, I keep telling Jan, it's been like the bright spot for me of everything that has [00:37:00] happened. 

Brenda Meller: Are you guys on video too? Are people like dressed? Made up and formal.

So 

Shawna Ramsey: know, so we give each other permission. Like we do not, I, I am not in full makeup. I do not have done nice like I do right now. I mean, I back a lot of times I'm not wearing makeup. I mean, and, and, but it's fine. I mean, you get to know each other quickly and I mean, we are all there to support one another.

Yeah. And just really be positive influences in each other's lives. Okay, I'm gonna commit 

Brenda Meller: to getting up, so I'm gonna, I'm gonna try this. I just, like, every day, I have to admit, now that I'm self employed, I, I structure my schedule in a way that works for me and for my family, and when the kids were in school, I would never, I would try never to set any meeting before 9 a.

m., because I like to get my daughter to the bus stop now, but, But now in kind of the COVID times that we're in, I mean it's, it's stressful and it's, it's challenging and the moods go up and down and I'm like, I'm going to sleep in. If I don't need to get up early in the morning, I'm going to sleep in.

But it, it sounds [00:38:00] intriguing the way you're describing it. So 

Shawna Ramsey: I'm going to. And I mean, we've had children make appearances. My daughter has make, made appearances at the accountability clinic. Anything is on the table. It's completely fine. 

Brenda Meller: Okay. Yeah, that's good to know. So I don't have to worry about, and sometimes here's my mom hack you guys too.

I will like, towards the end of the day, especially when my makeup's kind of like not feeling fresh anymore. I'll, I'll join a zoom call. I did this with the Troy team for the other day. I put my pink cowboy hat on and then I put my fun sunglasses on and then I put a I can't do it right now cause we're not in zoom, but I put in my zoom behind me, I put a picture of pie.

And then people are all distracted by all the fun stuff and they're not going, gosh, she looks really tired. 

Shawna Ramsey: That's a great, I mean, that, that's a great tip right there. Like wear something bright, like, I mean, cause you'll start to feel it to your energy level and go up. Yeah. And it's 

Brenda Meller: you know, when we first got on the call today, Shawna, you were like, wow, look at you're wearing your signature color.

[00:39:00] And I'm like, yeah, I've got like a grubby old t shirt on underneath. This is what we do as women, right? We get a compliment and we immediately diminish it. It's quite ugly underneath it. You know, it's not that good. So Dawn Peters do you know Dawn? She's. She's saying, Engage in Ann Arbor is really interesting and non traditional networking format geared towards introverts.

I don't, I know I'm connected with Dawn, but I've, have you heard of that group, Shawna, 

Shawna Ramsey: Engage? I've heard of Engage, for sure. I need to check it out more, because as you know, Brenda, I love organizations and checking out new organizations. Yeah, so, Shawna's 

Brenda Meller: like, you give her a challenge, and I don't even think about it, I'm like, I kind of mentioned in passing, Oh, you should check out Jan Griffiths.

She's really awesome. You should follow her and connect with her. And then the next thing I know, like Shauna is like doing business with Jan and she's on her success. You know, she's doing all these great things, but sometimes I'll be like, you know, just like, Oh, I should check that out. Shauna, have you heard about this?

And then [00:40:00] I'll see her the next time. And she's like, yeah, so I went to that group and checked it out. It's really awesome. So so somebody did respond to the INTJ. So. I is introvert. Thank you, Jean Chavlin, by the way, for that. I is introvert N is intuitive, T is thinking, J is judging, and then, is there an O, originator?

You have originator, too, in parentheses. So we have introvert, intuitive, thinking, judgmental, and then there's ESFP, extrovert, sensing, feeling, perceiving. So, we got a whole lot of acronyms going on here today. Yeah, 

Shawna Ramsey: for sure. And then there's also the Clifton Strengths Finder. I don't know if you've ever heard of that or people on here have heard of it.

But I've done that and that gives you kind of all a gamut of characteristics that you're made of as well. Okay, 

Brenda Meller: so what, I mean, what do we, what do we do with that information? Is that just more, okay, does it make you feel [00:41:00] better? Better because you know what you are or I mean, do you, do you use those in the workplace, Shauna, as you know, like a team building thing, or what do you do with those 

Shawna Ramsey: systems?

So the Clifton StrengthsFinder, I definitely have used in the workplace. In fact one of the last roles I had, I helped run a small team and everyone on the team took it. And it just really helped us figure out how to communicate with each other better because. We knew sort of what those strengths, what those strengths are.

And then we also could collaborate better that way too. So if I knew someone was super great at public speaking, for example, I don't know if that's a characteristic, but like say that came up, then I would go to them if I speak and like get tips from them or like maybe someone's really good at listening.

So they would be a good person to be on point to sort of help. Gather all the details when we're having meetings and discussing something. So things like that. And it really [00:42:00] helps. I felt like our team come together a little bit more after we did exercises like that. 

Brenda Meller: I'm taking us like way off topic.

I'm wondering a little bit. It's the, the power I think of, of conversation and, you know, especially I think in these sessions that we're in today, it's and we're having folks jump, jumping in and chime in on different things. Jan does say there's no, there's no judgment in her accountability clinic.

So. Absolutely none. Well, there you go. And Tisha Hammond says good things happen before 7am. Tisha, I gotta tell you, girl, I think the only thing good happening before 7am in my household, my husband makes the coffee, and I mean, a little plug right now, too, for this company, it's called Sugar Creek Coffee Roasters, they're in, I want to say North Carolina, they're in, in the United States, but they do small batch roasting of coffee, and when I put my daughter to bed at night, we, we say our prayers together, and one of the things we say in our prayers every night is, you know let mommy have one good cup of coffee every day, preferably made at home by daddy.

Because the coffee he makes is so [00:43:00] good. And that's the one thing that happens in my house over for 7 a. m. is my husband makes the coffee before I get up. Yeah. So go 

Shawna Ramsey: ahead, China. So for all of you introverts out there who have commented that you're an introvert, I want to share with everyone who's commented, commented that.

Signs that you're an extroverted introvert. I have a little list here that I can go through. Oh, yeah, please do. Yeah. Okay, so Number one, your energy level is closely tied to your environment. Okay, number two You find people to be both intriguing and exhausting. Number three, people and interactions drain you while others recharge you.

Brenda, ding, ding, ding. You can be charming, but also deeply introspective and reflective. Number five, when you feel rested and recharged, you [00:44:00] reach out to others. Number six, you need time to warm up in social situations. Okay. Number seven, it actually takes less energy to say what's on your mind than to make small talk.

Brenda Meller: So is this, is this an, are you an introverted extrovert or should I flip the 

Shawna Ramsey: words? So it's signs that you're an extroverted introvert. So you're an introvert that tends to sort of deviate onto the extrovert side on occasion. So Number eight you're selectively social. Okay. Number nine, you have no interest in trying to prove yourself in a crowd of strangers, which I can attest to that.

And then number ten. And this is the big one that we've talked a lot about. You're often confused for an extrovert. 

Brenda Meller: Hmm. So where is this from? Is this something you're reading on screen right now? 

Shawna Ramsey: Or where is this from? I have just, [00:45:00] I did a little cheat note. 

Brenda Meller: Are you guys like, where is she at? Can I read that?

Like, where can, can you share that with me? 

Shawna Ramsey: The list so you can, you can have that. Yes. Okay. That's 

Brenda Meller: awesome. Yeah. And, and there were so many things on there where you say like, even like the. You stress more about what you're going to talk about than the actual conversation itself. Like, should I say this?

Should'y I not say this? What's he going to think 

Shawna Ramsey: about this? What's he gonna, is he going to judge me? I mean like, just go for something, you know, 

Brenda Meller: and have the conversation. So, so we're actually reaching the end of our hour here together, Shawna. So I just wanted to you know, ask, are there any, any final comments you have for the group.

And as you do that, Shawna, I'm going to pull up your LinkedIn up on screen. I hope you don't mind. And this. Just to ask the question, Shauna, are you open to receiving invitations from folks here that are watching the session, or are you more like a follower, or what, what, 

Shawna Ramsey: what's your preference?

Absolutely, send me an invite, personalize it though. Okay. Personalize [00:46:00] it, so but yeah, I would love to connect with whoever is interested in connecting. 

Brenda Meller: Awesome. And then any final comments for us today, Shawna? I mean, we've been talking all, all show long about how introverts can rock at networking. So final pep talk to the group here for the introverts watching here today.

Shawna Ramsey: Be open to new opportunities and figure out ways to challenge yourself in those new opportunities. And honestly, it will pay off in dividends. Awesome. 

Brenda Meller: Well, thank you so much, Shawna. I have had just a blast chatting with you today. And I miss seeing you in person, but it's so nice to see your face on screen.

Shawna Ramsey: I miss you too, Brenda. Pretty soon, soon, we'll be able to see each other in 

Brenda Meller: person. Yeah, I feel like the conversations are starting to happen now about what that return to work may look like and return to networking events, I think will be shoulder bumping or elbow bumping. Yeah. Yeah. So, all right, guys.

Well, thank you again, [00:47:00] Shawna. Happy birthday. If you guys joined us, it's Shawna's birthday today. You got to drop a comment below and say happy birthday to Shawna before, before you leave here. And Shawna, any big plans for the birthday night tonight? 

Shawna Ramsey: Well, we'll probably have pie. It's secure pecan pie. I know you approve, Brenda.

Excellent. I just want to thank everybody too, for their participation. It's always fun to have people come in and I've really enjoyed it. So thank you for having me, Brenda. 

Brenda Meller: Absolutely. Thank you so much for joining Shawna. And guys, even if you're watching this in playback, I will share the links with Shawna.

so that she can watch your, your links later. And we were even talking, you know, sometimes these live events, we get a lot of people watching them live, but then Shauna and I do the same thing. We'll like pull up our phone before we get on the road. And we kind of like, this is like a podcast. We'll find like earlier broadcasts and we'll listen back to them.

And then I am going to be putting this on YouTube and Shauna, eventually I will get a podcast up and going. And I know this is going to be one of the episodes that goes into the podcast as well. So there'll be [00:48:00] continued listenership and viewership opportunities over time. 

Shawna Ramsey: That'll be great. And I can't wait to have new connections and be connected to everybody who is on here.

And this is a great time. Thanks, 

Brenda Meller: Brenda. Yeah. Well, thank you guys. Thank you, Shauna, for your time today. And for your awesome insights on sharing how we can rock as introverts. You guys have a great rest of your day. Stay safe. And thanks for listening.