Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Freedom, Money Management, Scarcity Mindset, Budgeting, Financial Planning

108 | What If Budgeting Felt Empowering? 3 Financial Mindset Shifts to Enjoy Managing Your Money

• Erin Gray | Financial Coach, Former Certified Financial Planner and CFO

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If budgeting feels like punishment, you're not alone. In this episode, I share how to shift from fear-based money management to an empowering, joyful practice rooted in alignment and abundance.

You'll learn:

  • 3 powerful financial mindset shifts to replace restriction with ease
  • How to view expenses as receipts of appreciation rather than losses
  • Why flexible money systems support your real life better than rigid budgets
  • How celebration and emotional regulation can transform your money habits

This episode is for the female entrepreneur ready to ditch scarcity and embrace a new relationship with money—one built on values, joy, and self-trust.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Busting Loose from the Money Game by Robert Scheinfeld 

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Money doesn't have to feel overwhelming. Let's create a strategy that feels nurturing and custom to you.

From my soul to yours,

Erin

Erin Gray:

let's be honest, most budgeting advice feels really restrictive. We're told to cut out lattes, track every single penny and somehow white knuckle our way into financial success. White knuckle our way into financial success which, in my opinion, is coming from a place of lack and fear. And although we might do it or we can do it, my question back would be why and I truly believe that when lack and fear is the root cause of doing something with our money, we're going to get lack and fear as the results also. So, if you're anything like me or the women that I work with, that approach does not feel empowering, and I'm all about empowerment. It feels very exhausting, it feels restrictive. I've had women come to me and say it feels very boring, not fun, and I totally agree.

Erin Gray:

So in this episode, we're going to flip the script. I'm going to dive into three practical tips that are going to give you. So in this episode, we're going to flip the script. I'm going to give you three practical tips that's going to help you finally enjoy managing your money. These tips are coming from a place of sufficiency, of love, from joy and gratitude. They're really about helping you make intentional, confident financial decisions that actually support the life you want. So you know that you want to take control of your money and create a system that feels easy, more like freedom rather than the restriction, but maybe you're feeling a little bit overwhelmed, like it's going to take so much time and so much effort and so much energy. I really want to invite you to my one-on-one master your money coaching program. It's going to teach you how to align your finances with who you are, your goals, really simplify money management and overcome the fear and stress that keeps holding you back. You don't need to spend hours on complicated strategies. There's so much information out there. I'm going to show you how to create a simple, customized plan specifically for you that works for you, tailored to your unique needs, your goals and your values. We're going to focus on practical 3D strategies right, we're going to focus on practical strategies, what I call the 3D of money, right? You want to know where your money is going. You want to know how you want to circulate it. And also the 5d the spiritual, the emotional side. I'm going to empower you to overcome the limiting beliefs and emotional blocks that you might have currently around money so that you can create a relationship with money that feels calm right, that you feel in control, at peace, and let's make financial clarity easy and fun, not time-consuming. I would love to work with you one-on-one so that we can start. I would love to work with you one-on-one so you can start building the life that you deserve, the business that you really want, with clarity, with confidence, and create true financial freedom. You can schedule your call by going to generatealifewelllivedcom and booking a session with me. I'm looking forward to it.

Erin Gray:

So, when clients typically come to me, a lot of times we've been in this 3d world of, you know, making our budget fit within some. So let's start with my tip Number one really starting to focus on alignment. That is coming from a place of abundance, sufficiency, not restriction, which very much comes from lack and fear. So instead of thinking where do I need to cut, asking yourself, does this expense reflect what I value and the life that I want to create, I like to look at expenses as receipts of appreciation instead of an expense. There is a book called busting loose from the money game and I'll put it in the show notes, and he really has you thinking about expenses from a place of appreciation, right, when you go to pay your bill, being so grateful that you have electricity to turn on the lights and to heat your house or cool your house, or when you decided to go and take your family out for lunch. That that was. You know. That adds to the memory bank and that that is an experience. So, instead of looking at it as an expense, is something that's taking away. It's adding to your life. Right? This shift alone can really start to change everything. So when you're spending aligns with your values whether that's ease or creativity, freedom or generosity it's easier to feel good about spending and circulating your money.

Erin Gray:

I don't think budgeting should be a punishment, and that is how so many of us kind of have looked at it. It's very similar to weight loss. It's like this restrictive mentality. I think we need to look at the word of allocating. Right, instead of budgeting, we're allocating our money. How do we want to do that? It comes from a place of clarity. Right? It's about saying yes to what matters most to you, what you value, and no to what doesn't light you up, what isn't in alignment with you anymore. You know, when you think about being in alignment, it feels good spending money, even making generating money, when you are in alignment. That is, when I say alignment, I mean from your soul, right, it feels good to your soul to generate money in ways that light you up and serve the world, not from a place of have to, should to should right. Same thing with spending our money really slowing down and getting clear when you are spending your money. Does this come from a place of soul alignment or is this coming from a place of have to or fear or rushed place? Really getting clear on that.

Erin Gray:

Tip number two is really using you can start using just flexible spending buckets instead of these rigid categories. Now some of my clients really like to like know where everything is and have different categories, you know, of accounts. If this feels too restrictive to you, like this goes back to, it depends on every single person. This is why I don't think overall generic advice works for everyone, because you have to take it what the advice someone is giving and then run it through your own filter. So, if you know, traditional budgets sometimes feel so restrictive and we don't stick with them because sometimes they're too granular, right, they don't account for real life.

Erin Gray:

So maybe looking at using more broad, flexible categories that reflect your priorities so you could look at like the essentials. I look at that in terms of, like, those are things that you're going to have, no matter what your mortgage, your rent, your property taxes, your insurance. Like, what are those things that are you're going to have every single month and they're not going to change joy and lifestyle, right? Like, how much do you want to allocate to those types of things? You know, I had a client say well, how do I, you know, account for my child? It's like, well, we, we account for it. We allocate money for your two-year-old so that we plan for things, and that helped her gain more clarity as to okay, how much am I spending, how much do I want to spend, and really feeling good, like then she didn't have shame when she was buying something for him because she had money allocated for him specifically.

Erin Gray:

And then let's talk about savings, because I really feel like the financial industry talks about savings from a place of lack and fear. You know, how often have you heard famous gurus talk about having six months of cash reserve on hand? And I really want to encourage you to think about what is that energy that it's coming from when we think about cash reserves, when we think about having six months worth of expenses. To me that feels like something's gonna happen. We need to make sure we have money. And when we are in that vibration of something's going to happen, we need to make sure we have money. Something will always happen.

Erin Gray:

Now you might say you know what I like, just having money, because if something comes up or I want to, you know, use it for X, y, z, that's totally fine. You just have to check the vibration that you're in of why you have this money. That's why I don't use words like emergency savings account, because when we are having an account for an emergency, an emergency is going to happen. So maybe it's just you're having an account instead of a savings account. It's just an account that you have so that you know what, if opportunities come along, you have money to invest in or to circulate or whatever it might be. You know this might give you the structure, these more broad buckets, and here you go back to. You have to run it through. What is your lens? If you're someone that likes to look at every little area, then this might not work for you. If you're someone that's like you know what I like bigger, broader buckets and that feels better to me, then do that, so it might give you the structure without having to micromanage like every little dollar.

Erin Gray:

And then the third tip is celebrate every time you engage with your money. I can't tell you how many times this is true for me. This has been my journey as well, so of course it's going to show up with my clients, is you know? I'll ask a client like how often are you celebrating yourself? And more often than not, the answer is not much, right, it's. It's almost this withholding of celebration, withholding of love until we get to a certain place. It's very conditional, um, celebration and love versus celebrating everything, anything that feels. You know your brain might tell you it's, it's too, it's too small to celebrate. But that is actually when you need to be celebrating, right, getting in the habit of celebrating.

Erin Gray:

Most people avoid their money because it feels heavy. You know how we grew up with money, what we believe about money currently, and so we have to create. If we want to live a different life, if we want to feel more ease and flow and trust and abundance with money, we have to create a new emotional experience around it. So every time you check your accounts, you're looking at your income or you're making a decision, celebrate it. You know that could be like I say with money dates. You know that could be lighting a candle. It could be playing Like I talked about. I love piano guys. It's so like nervous system soothing and regulation to me. Playing piano guys, playing your favorite playlist, you know acknowledging like hey, you know what I'm so proud of you for showing up because you did what you said you were going to do. Right, we are women and becoming women that are do what we say we are going to do.

Erin Gray:

So when managing your money becomes something that you associate because right now, if we're avoiding our money, we probably perceive money to be a threat right, there's probably some lower vibration emotions that are causing us to not be with our money. But when we can associate our money as being calm, as feeling joy in our body, as feeling grateful or abundant, and maybe those are not emotions that you can get to immediately and that's okay, right, but where is the neutrality? Where is going from shame and guilt to going to curiosity and neutrality and then getting to the place of feeling calm, of feeling joy and grateful for the money you have? Right, it's going to stop feeling like a chore. It's going to start becoming a habit and something that you actually look forward to.

Erin Gray:

You know, last weekend I sat down. I typically sit down with our money first and then I bring Jason and my husband for us to talk about money and look at where we are, like how much money did we create this week? And like, what did our investments do? And you know, what do we want to allocate moving forward for the next week or month. And it's exciting to sit down with my money Now. It's exciting to allocate where do we want to circulate our money and to look at what we've created from an income standpoint. That's fun. It used to not be that way, Right, and it and I want to say that our brains want to say, oh, that's because the money changed. No, it's because you have to change who you are first. So money loves to be paid attention to right.

Erin Gray:

When we actually sit down and we cultivate this relationship with ourselves and with our money, the easier it gets, the more that we actually want to do it. Think of a pleasant experience when you love to go see your girlfriend, if it, if she were to sit down and complain the entire time and tell you how you aren't good enough and how you know you never call and you never do this. Like, how often do we want to hang out with that friend? But when our friend is so happy to see us and you know it's been looking forward to it and it's such a fun time that we get to spend together we want to do more of that. So we have to create that within ourselves so that we can do that with our money.

Erin Gray:

So, love on your money, you know, show appreciation for what you have, for how far you have come, even the littlest, and I think that that is a skill set and a muscle that we need to build and cultivate. Right, look at, like, listen, over the last four weeks I have consistently sat down with money, my money. I am so proud of myself. Like, give yourself the attagirls and you don't need my permission and I'm giving you permission. Right, you know you don't need my permission and also I'm giving you permission. You don't have to follow somebody else's restrictive budgeting rules that you found on the internet or you heard from some other podcast. Right, you get to feel in control now. Right, who you are, you get to decide to feel confident now, and it starts by what you believe about yourself, what you think, what you feel and then the action that you take. So start by shifting from a place of avoidance, and so you can start by thinking okay, who is the person that celebrates her progress? Who is the person that is so proud of herself? How does she show up and start practicing that?

Erin Gray:

If you want support, I would love to have you join me for a one-on-one master your money coaching session.

Erin Gray:

We will look at and work together to create a tailored plan that helps you align your values, your goals, your finances. I want to invite you to join me for a one-on-one master your money coaching session During this hour. We're going to take a look at and work together to create a tailored plan for you that helps you align your values, your goals, where you are financially, with your specific energy, your mindset. I want to invite you to join me for a one-on-one master your money coaching session During this hour. We will work together to create a tailored plan that helps you align with your finances, so you can get clear on where you are financially and where you want to go and really start transforming your relationship with money so that you can create more ease, more flow, more freedom, more trust in your life. You can head out, you can head over. You can head over to my website, generate a life while livedcom and schedule your session. That's all I have for you today and I will see you in the next episode.