Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Mastery, Wealth Mindset, Leadership Principles, Intuitive Decision-Making, Human Design
You’ve built something real.
The revenue is there. The team is there. The advisors are there.
And yet there are moments when you still feel the weight of holding the whole picture: the decisions, the responsibility, and the pressure of being the person everyone looks to for answers.
I'm Erin Gray, Strategic Holistic Advisor, former Certified Financial Planner™, entrepreneur, and host of the Your Money Your Rules Podcast.
This podcast is for successful women entrepreneurs and founders who want to build wealth without abandoning themselves in the process.
Each week, we explore leadership, decision-making, self-trust, wealth, nervous system capacity, and what it actually means to create success on your own terms.
Part strategy. Part perspective. Part invitation to trust yourself more deeply.
Because more information isn't always what you need.
Sometimes what you need is perspective.
I’m glad you’re here.
Your Money, Your Rules | Financial Mastery, Wealth Mindset, Leadership Principles, Intuitive Decision-Making, Human Design
164 | Why Focusing on Paying Off Debt Isn’t the Path to Financial Freedom
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In this episode, you’ll learn:
- Why having a goal of paying off debt keeps you stuck in scarcity
- How the subconscious mind amplifies the words you repeat
- Replacing debt goals with heart led goals
- Choosing value, impact, and revenue as your compass
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Working With the Law by Raymond Holliwell
Ways to Connect with Me and Learn More:
Generate a Life Well Lived Website
Why Debt Isn’t A Worthy Goal
Erin GrayToday we're going to be diving into a topic that some women in business have thought about at some point. I know this because when I receive the form that you complete when you want to sit down and visit with me, um, paying off debt is one of those things that is often on there. And this also is with other women that I visit with and talk to. And so I want to discuss today about focusing your energy or having a goal of paying off the debt. And I'm going to get into why I think that this is not the energy that we want to be in.
Workshop Invite: Money Talks Without Conflict
Erin GrayAlso, before we dive in, I want to invite you to workshop that I am hosting on Tuesday, December 16th at 10 a.m. Mountain Standard Time. We are going to be diving into how to have money conversations with your spouse without the conflict so that there aren't any shutdowns or defensiveness or argumentativeness, no walking on eggshells or whatever it is that you might be feeling when you want to have money conversations with your spouse. So if you want more communication that feels more grounded and connected instead of tense or full of friction, come join us on Tuesday, December 16th at 10 a.m. Mountain Standard Time, and I will put the link in the show notes to register.
Language, Energy, And The Subconscious
Erin GraySo because I believe that we are all energy, what you focus on grows. And I think sometimes when we're doing this work, we have a tendency or maybe we have been taught to focus on what we don't want. And that hasn't necessarily been said outright by our parents to us. But that is sometimes it's almost like, well, let's solve for the problem versus focusing on what we want. And when you think about debt, when you think about paying off debt, when you think about paying down debt, what your subconscious, all that your subconscious hears is debt, debt, debt, debt, debt. And the subconscious doesn't hear yes or no. It just hears yes. So when you say, I don't want to have more debt, what the subconscious hears is, I want more debt. When you say, I want to make more money, your subconscious hears, make more money. So really start to pay attention to your language, to the words, obviously, that you use, what you are actually focusing on, because they are the same side of the coin, right? Making more money, getting out of debt, opposite sides of the same coin. That's what I should say. It's the same coin, it's just the opposite sides of it. So when you are focusing on making more money, by default, you will be able to pay off your debt. When you focus on paying down your debt, all you're thinking about is paying and you know, debt and paying off the debt. So really start to focus on what you want.
The Heat And Cold Analogy
Erin GrayI want to read you a passage from the book. It's called Working with the Law. It's by Raymond Hollowell. It's 11 Truth Principles for Successful Living. I highly recommend this book. I also recommend reading it multiple times at different levels of your consciousness and your awareness so that you can absorb it and receive the messages at a deeper level. And in this specific chapter, I'm reading off of page 31, he talks about the law of thinking. And what he says is, and this is why I wanted to read this to you, because it has to do with like what are you focusing on? He says, some think that we must deal with two forces. That is, to attract the good, we must do away with the bad. But this is not true. For example, if we are cold, we do not work with cold and heat alike in order to get warm. What we do is we build a fire, and as we gather around the fire, we enjoy the heat that is extended from it and become warm. And as we build up warmth, the cold disappears. For cold is the absence of heat. To be warm, we give our whole thought to the things which tend to create warmth. We ignore the cold in thinking of heat and bring forth heat. Prosperity and poverty are not two things, they are merely two sides of one and the same thing. They are but one power, rightly or wrongly used. We cannot think of plenty and then worry about the unfavorable conditions that may seem apparent. We think about plenty, and as we think of it, lack, its opposite, will become absorbed or disappear. All of
Replace Debt Goals With Desire
Erin Grayour thoughts must be directed to that one thing which we desire in order that our desires may be fulfilled. So I want you to really stop and think about, because I've talked about this before of like there's just abundance, there's just health, there's just wealth, there's just love. And then there is the absence of that. And when we are focused on what we want, abundance, more money, more love, more health, that is what we are going to get. So I want you to for a moment pause and stop thinking about how do I pay off my debt or focused on paying off your debt. I want you to be thinking about how can I create more money? Because that has you thinking from a higher frequency and you will receive downloads to help you. Versus when you are thinking about paying off debt, you're focusing just on paying off debt and paying off debt is not expansion. I also want to say here, paying off debt is not a goal. That is not a heart's desire. When I think of goals, I think of heart's desire. When I think about paying off debt, I think of that as a task. Like a task to me feels more of like this. Let's get this done because it feels like relief. It feels like something that needs to be done versus heart's desire and goal feels expansive and joyful. And so making more money so you get to travel more and enjoy yourself. And a byproduct of that is you pay off debt. But the goal isn't to pay off debt. The debt is going to go away. You will pay off the debt the more money that you make. Yes, there is the mindset around like, okay, when we we do have to address how did the debt
Addressing Root Causes Of Debt
Erin Grayget created? Like if you created debt because you went into business and you have some debt for your business, okay, that's very different energy than I went into debt because I was overspending and shopping because I wasn't willing to fill my feelings. So I'm not saying, oh, just disregard the debt completely. You know, don't even look at from the energy of how did we get here? Because there are lessons to be learned there. But what I want you to think about of how am I going to pay off this debt, I want you to be asking yourself not that question. It is going to be, how do I create more money or the desire or acting from the assumption of making more money and allowing yourself to receive the downloads to create more money. Focus on what you want, not on what you don't want. And this really is a mindset shift because I do believe that the financial industry has had us
Shift To Value, Impact, And Income
Erin Grayheavily. I know, like Dave, what is his name? Dave Ramsay, right? Like he really talks about a lot about debt. And just like Raymond Hollowell said in the book, it's it's the opposite side of the same coin. So really start to focus on what you want, creating more money, adding more value to the world, impacting more lives. The debt will take care of itself as you make more money. So sit with that this week. Think about where are you focusing or have you been focusing on wanting to pay off debt?
Reflection Prompts And Closing
Erin GrayIs that even a goal for you? And if it is a goal, let's insert a different goal that feels more fun and expansive and focus on what is the amount of money that you want to create or manifest and focusing on that. Okay, my friends, I'm rooting for you. I love you. I will see you in the next episode.