Money Needs Grace | Linda Grizely | Growing Money With Sean Trace

In this episode of Growing Money with Sean Trace, I sit down with Linda Grizely, a certified financial planner and financial wellness speaker, to talk about why money feels so emotional, confusing, and sometimes intimidating for so many people. 

We get into how our childhood money stories shape the way we spend, save, avoid, and judge ourselves financially. Linda breaks down why traditional financial advice can feel too rigid, especially when it ignores personality, habits, shame, and real life. I loved her idea of financial confidence because it is not about being rich or perfect. It is about understanding your cash flow, knowing your values, and making money decisions without guilt taking over. We also talk about her “Me Money Method,” which gives people permission to spend intentionally while still staying financially responsible. 

This conversation is all about making personal finance feel more human, practical, and less shame-filled.

What is one money habit you learned growing up that you are still trying to unlearn today?

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Yeah, absolutely. And and you're not alone. I would think that I think that the majority of people go down that path where they they they feel shame because they they know there's these things they should be doing and they know they're not doing them. It's like knowing that you should be doing this and you're not doing it, and then you feel guilty about it and you feel shame around it. And and that's that's the thing that when you have that financial confidence and you understand more about the things you are doing and you can put them into perspective. Um, like you should make a spreadsheet and do a budget, right? If somebody gives you that advice and you're like, yeah, I really should do that, I need to do that, and you don't, understanding that that's not my personality. Like, I am not, that's not ever gonna work for me. I need to figure out a different way to budget, right? So there's different, there's different types of budgeting. The same type is not gonna work for each person. Um, and the more you feel empowered to work with yourself, with your money personality, with your money history and understanding your money history, the more that you're going to feel empowered to do the things and more confidence and get rid of that shame around money.

SPEAKER_00 1:19

Welcome, everybody, back to the Growing Money with Sean Trace Podcast. I'm your host, Sean Trace, and I've got an awesome guest with me today. Would you like to tell people who you are and a little bit about what you do?

SPEAKER_01 1:28

Sure. I'm Linda Grizzly. I am a certified financial planner, and I uh mainly am a financial wellness speaker. So I love to spread the word about the human variable in personal finance and how you can bring yourself into the conversation and help you understand how you interact with money.

SPEAKER_00 1:52

I love that. It's interesting too because money has become it's changed, it's constantly changing. You know, we our money used to be much more physical, you know, people would carry around coins and cash and dollars, and we still have that. But with everything becoming much more digital, there's this, I find it even harder to kind of conceptualize a relationship with money because they're just numbers that go up and down, you know? And it's like almost harder to kind of to have that relationship. But I want to ask you because um you have you you talk a lot about making money feel more human and less intimidating, which to me is awesome. Why do you think so many people grow up afraid to even talk about money?

SPEAKER_01 2:38

Well, we weren't, we didn't talk about money. Most of us, our parents, didn't talk about money. So we learned not to talk about money. And we also were taught like you don't talk about it because you don't want to say how much you have or you don't have, and you don't want to say how much you make, or you know, you don't, you just, it's not appropriate to talk about that, right? But more importantly, we grew up around a story about money. And everybody's story about money is unique to them, right? It could be silence where nobody ever talked about money. It could be stress where you could feel the stress, like when you were a child, if you wanted something and you could feel the stress, like your parent wanted to say yes, but they had to say no. Or there could be conflict, like you could hear parents arguing about money, right? There's all these different stories that we that we created is our money history. We created in our minds about things we saw, we heard, we experienced, our circumstances, all of that goes into it too. But I think that people are afraid to talk about it because they feel like they're doing something wrong. They're ashamed, they feel like they haven't done all the things they should do. There's those shoulds, right? So I think that there's a combination of all these things. Like people learn early on that money is emotional, dangerous, embarrassing, and things that you're supposed to know, but nobody ever taught you. And like there's this stuff like you kind of know. And so it just gets confusing, and there's anxiety and shame and all these feelings around it that people don't know how to unpack.

SPEAKER_00 4:17

Right. It's interesting too. You talk about all these feelings about it. We compress all of our feelings. And money is this just this layer that is even deeper, you know? And I like you're right. And whether we realize it or not, there are we grow up with games around us. Like I remember it in high school and grade school, grade school, it was early. That, you know, kids would look at you, oh, you don't have those shoes, you don't have this. And it's like from an early age, we have keeping up with the Joneses, like drilled into us. Like, and I think it's a this idea of safety. Like, if you're not different from the pack, you'll be safe, you know. But the reality is you can be spending your way into an absolutely unsafe place if you are trying to always keep up with the Joneses, if you're always trying to match people. And it's like there was an interesting thing that I was reading about how one type of behavior that is a very common behavior, uh, I can't remember what it was, but it worldwide was actually extremely unhealthy. And, you know, let's pick everyone drinks a slushy drink. I'll pick some non-branded thing. They drink a slushy drink three times a day, and everyone's like, yes, this is very healthy. And for a long time, everyone thinks it's healthy, and they all do it. But the reality is, is it's probably not. And you might be that one person going, I'm gonna switch that out for water or something else that actually is nourishing. And the reality is, is like people are all so often going down this path that they might not know is unhealthy, but because we're not talking about it, no one knows that it's not a good path, you know? And it's interesting to me because I one of the reasons I created this podcast is for the ability of simply creating a place that people can talk about money and that other people that because I find that there are some great podcasts, I know some awesome financial advisors that have awesome financial advisor podcasts. And they talk about all the stuff that I do not understand. And there's a place for that. You know, I love that. But for me, I'm trying to just talk about the questions for people that don't get it, you know, and how can they start interacting with money differently? Because I think there's a lot more people out there like me than there are people who get it all, you know?

SPEAKER_01 6:38

Yeah. Here's the thing people have this idea in their head about what other people where other people are or where they stand, right? So they think, they think that based on how someone looks or acts or the house they live in, the car they drive, the clothes they have, that they're in a certain category financially. But that is absolutely not the best way to know what how what a person's financial status is, because that keeping up with the Joneses and having all those things actually sets you up to have more debt and more money struggles than the millionaire next door, where you live within your means, you work hard, you save your money, and you don't have the fancy car, and you're the one with the money in the bank. Like I think people have this concept that having all this flashy stuff means you have money.

SPEAKER_00 7:27

And you don't understand how people are working with their money. We recently bought our, I bought my daughter a new piano. Okay. Now, her old piano was 25-year-old as a 25-year-old digital piano that my wife's parents gave to her. My daughter studied on that piano for five years. And when it died, I did everything I could. I called the repair, I called three repair people out to say, can you fix this for us? Right. Because I'm I'm super thrifty. And the guy looked at me and he's like, would you fix a 25-year-old computer? I said, Well, I am the type that would, but like, you know, are you telling me this is not a good idea? And he's like, I can fix this, but it's gonna be about this much money. And I think he said it's gonna be about 250 bucks to fix. And he's like, this piano, like in better condition, is $400. And then he said, you know, but there's some other great pianos out there. You can buy a brand new digital piano for uh $700. And then he's like, and then I started researching and I found that I could find a wooden upright piano that had been refixed, redone, remodeled, re-I don't know how you say, like completely refurbished. Uh, that was 50 years old and it was also 700. But I also know that that 50-year-old piano is going to be good for another 40 more years because it's a Yamaha and it's good condition. And so my wife and I, we'd set aside some money, and my daughter had been playing piano for five years. She's playing Bach now, and there's a reason that we're putting an investment into this, right? But what was wild is when I brought that up into my house, my workers immediately looked at me and said, You guys are rich because you bought this. And I said, No, actually, we said we're just doing things step by step. But there was this projection of you guys have a wooden piano, you must be really wealthy and having all this. And it's like, it's first of all, it's not a grand piano. Second of all, it was the cheapest option. If I bought a digital piano that's new for the same price, you know, in 10 years, I'm gonna have to get a new piano. You know, it's like this, I'm good for my proud daughter, probably won't need another piano in her life. This will last for her, you know, for 30, 40 years. So I think that one of the things is that we we don't see the moves people are making. You you see, um, I see this one Instagram, TikTok, the kid goes up and he says, How did you become a billionaire? You know, and it's like, I'm super millionaire. And they tell their things, but they don't show the habits. They don't show the behaviors, you know. It's like, well, I did this, I invested in this. And so people walk away going, Oh, if I invest in swimwear, I can become a billionaire too. But they don't realize that it's not the swimwear that made that person a millionaire. It was the habits that were paired with everything else, if that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 10:25

Exactly. Makes a lot of sense to me. Hopefully it makes sense to the listeners too. But yeah, it's it's absolutely the habits. And I think the thing is, is that when one of the things I talk about is how financial advice is not built for humans. It's built for a spreadsheet, it's just numbers only. And that's why it's so hard to follow because you can listen to the advice and you can understand it. You can be like, yes, that makes sense. I need to do this, this, and this. But then when you try to put it into practice, it's really hard to do. And I think that people think like it's all or nothing. And that's that's the biggest part that I try to help people understand is that, you know, if you take someone who, if you say, okay, you take 10 people and you say, We're all gonna do a spreadsheet and put together our budget and we're gonna put all our numbers down and we're gonna figure this out and we're gonna live within our means and we're gonna do all this great stuff, we're gonna save money. Those 10 people are gonna have 10 different money, 10 different money personalities, 10 different money histories, so 10 completely different money DNAs. And one of them might be like, this is perfect for me. This is exactly what I needed. But probably the other nine are gonna be like, this isn't gonna work for me. Someone might be like, I don't once they hear the word spreadsheet, they might just shut completely off. Another person might be like, okay, I can get the numbers here, but like I'm a natural spender, so I feel so restricted that I'm gonna shut down a little ways in. There's just so many different things, but you take that one thing talking about budgeting, and you find a way that it works for each of those 10 different people's personalities, and then it starts to make sense. But you're doing the same thing, you're just finding a different way to approach it with each different person because this the one thing doesn't work for everybody.

SPEAKER_00 12:15

I, I, I right. I find that most often when I go to the gym, and you you see people, and we're all built differently. Like, you know, I'm not a power lifter. I'm not the guy who's gonna be shaped like Arnold as much as I would like to be, as much as I'd love to get in crazy shape like that. I can get bigger, but I'm tall, skinny, lanky guy. And like there's just a certain makeup to who I am. Now, if I go and do this, it's not gonna help me. And if I do this, it's not gonna help me. I have to find the thing that's you know uniquely mine. But I wanted to ask you something too, because it started to get me into this question of like, what is the goal of all of this? Because I I find that people a lot of times try to figure things out. And, you know, financial freedom is thrown around a lot. But I I saw a term that you use that I really am interested in and I want to talk to you about. And for someone who doesn't really understand anything about money, I wanted to ask you what is financial confidence? And how would you explain it in the simplest of terms? Because that to me is something I I like the vibe of that, but I want to see if I fully understand it.

SPEAKER_01 13:26

Sure. I'm gonna go backwards a minute though, because I want to go back to your gym analogy. Because we talked, you mentioned habits, and I went into about how the spreadsheet works for some people and not others, and then you talked about the gym. And I need to circle back to habits because both of those are about the habits, right? The spreadsheet is the equivalent of you saying, I'm gonna go to the gym, you know, like you haven't you haven't been to the gym in 10 years, and you're gonna like, I'm gonna start going to the gym every single day at 5 a.m. And I'm gonna do it um, you know, five days a week, and um, I'm gonna have this circuit and like you plan everything out exactly. And that all looks great on paper, but to actually put it into practice is the other thing. So that's where you talk about building habits and you start small. You know, I'm gonna go to the gym one day a week and I'm gonna work on this, and then I'm gonna build that to two days a week and I'm gonna add this in, or I'm gonna, you know, you you build those habits. So I wanted to circle back to that because I don't think we close that out. Um, and then I can go to financial confidence if you're ready.

SPEAKER_00 14:24

I'm ready when you are.

SPEAKER_01 14:26

Okay. So financial confidence. Okay. So when you think about being financially confident, you think about being able to make a decision and know that you're making the right decision and not having buyers' remorse, not feeling like you feel guilty that you spent money on yourself. Having confidence means you can handle your money instead of your money handling you. Like you have the idea that you know what's happening, so you know you can make that decision, right? It doesn't mean being rich. It means under you understand what's going on and you know how to make those decisions in a way that you just feel confident with. Like you can, you can um learn to know like what your what your cash flow is, what you can spend money on, what you shouldn't spend money on. You're making decisions that are based on your values and understanding if I say yes to this now, I'm gonna have to say no to something later. If I say no to this now, I might be able to say yes to something later. And understanding that and just getting a handle on cash flow and how it works, but also the feelings that you're having and recognizing those, recognizing patterns that show up. The more you become self-aware, the more financial confidence you'll have.

SPEAKER_00 15:46

I like that there's this idea of self-awareness in personal finance because I think that so often, like there's so many of our areas of our life that we go on this autopilot, we just cruise and we think it's gonna take care of itself, it's gonna be okay. But there are times when those things don't just fix themselves. The boat doesn't just write itself. And you have to figure out what are the things that you can do to get there. And what are you avoiding doing? And what are you, you know, not doing entirely? You know, for me, when I get overwhelmed, I just kind of coast. And I'm thrifty, but I try to just coast. And that's something that's been a problem throughout my life, whether it be for fitness or other areas. And I'm just like hoping that these things will take care of themselves. But then I turn around and look back and go, wow, the last six weeks, I didn't go to the gym. I didn't eat healthy, I didn't manage my finances because I was in stress. Life is stressful. And as you add layers of stress as you get older, whether it be starting your own business or getting moving up in the business world or becoming a parent, suddenly that that autopilot becomes a very dangerous thing. You know, so this self-awareness can be a place that you can you can um start to write your ship. But I want to tie it into another area because something you talked about earlier that I think is tied to this is the shame. You know, because I think that whenever I start going into autopilot, I feel immense guilt about doing so. I know it's not the right thing. And yet I still go down that path.

SPEAKER_01 17:27

Yeah, absolutely. And and you're not alone. I would think that I think that the majority of people go down that path where they they they feel shame because they they know there's these things they should be doing and they know they're not doing them. It's like knowing that you should be doing this and you're not doing it, and then you feel guilty about it and you feel shame around it. And and that's that's the thing that when you have that financial confidence and you understand more about the things you are doing and you can put them into perspective. Um, like you should make a spreadsheet and do a budget, right? If somebody gives you that advice and you're like, yeah, I really should do that, I need to do that, and you don't, understanding that that's not my personality. Like, I am not, that's not ever gonna work for me. I need to figure out a different way to budget, right? So there's different, there's different types of budgeting. The same type is not gonna work for each person. Um, and the more you feel empowered to work with yourself, with your money personality, with your money history and understanding your money history, the more that you're going to feel empowered to do the things and more confidence and get rid of that shame around money.

SPEAKER_00 18:41

I love that. Well, and I wanted to ask you this next question because I do feel it's tied together. Because you said that people don't need more shame or lectures, but why do you think the traditional financial advice sometimes makes people feel worse instead of better?

SPEAKER_01 18:56

It's exactly because of all the things I've been talking about, is that it's telling them what they should do and they know they should do it. They understand it. It makes sense. Yes, I should be doing that. But in real life, it doesn't happen that way.

unknown 19:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:09

In real to put it into practice in real life is hard to do, you know? Um and so I think that, you know, if people I can take the example of like um something that like people are like, oh, the the latte factor, stop buying coffee, right? But if that's what lights you up, if that's what keeps you going, like you know what I mean, then for all buy the coffee. But if you say yes to the coffee, you might have to say no to something else. It's not about the coffee, it's about realizing if I say yes to the coffee, I have to say no to something else, and not just to be saying yes to everything, right?

SPEAKER_00 19:47

Yeah. I find that it's about setting those I have to set those healthy boundaries with myself. Like it's not the coffee, um, it's the cascade. For me, it's the cascade. And so I have to think about that of because for me, once I start justifying, and you know, my my guilty pleasure is not the coffee. I I get I I have a I live in Southeast Asia part of the time, and when I'm here, one of the things I miss from home is Mexican food. And there's a great Mexican food I restaurant I found, but the the challenge is it's not cheap. And, you know, I will allow myself that, but the cascade for me is like, all right, let's just do this every single day or three days a week, you know, or or no, three days, three times a day. And it's not that, and then that becomes something else. And I think that like if you are able to sit there and go, dude, it's just a cup of coffee, and that's your thing, and it's not a cascade, I think it's so different. And like, and the shame shouldn't be there around it because if someone loves coffee and where you pick up on that one thing, you know, like you shouldn't have the cup of coffee, and yet that person is leasing a car for 900 bucks a month and they don't have the budget for that, and you're like, stop drinking the coffee. But the reality is you're not talking about them, or they have an apartment or a mortgage that's insanely outside of the range of what they can pay for, but we're preaching about coffee. Like, we're not looking at areas that might actually help the person. You know what I mean? It's like this one size fits all, but that's not the reality.

SPEAKER_01 21:21

Right. So the coffee in the Mexican food. Um, I have uh my budgeting uh rule that I teach is called the me money method. And really what it is is it's just budgeting for the discretionary items. So it doesn't look at your necessary items, like your, you know, your housing, your utilities, maybe even your car or the clothing, all those things that you have to have. Maybe your clothing probably comes into the me money too, but the things you have to have, those are there and they are kind of set what they are. I mean, yes, you might have to have a bigger conversation about um people that are not living within their means and keeping up with the Joneses. But if you, if you budget just for your Discretionary items and you say, okay, I have this much that I'm going to spend monthly on my discretionary items. That allows you, if you choose to go out to eat for Mexican food every single day and it's in that me money discretionary budget, if that's what you choose to spend it on, then that's what you choose to spend it on. If coffee's what you choose to spend it on, that's fine.

SPEAKER_00 22:20

I love it.

SPEAKER_01 22:21

But you only have this much. And if you spend it on that, you're going to say no to something else.

SPEAKER_00 22:26

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 22:27

And when it's gone, it's gone.

SPEAKER_00 22:30

I love that. I love that because I was trying to talk to. I have this podcast because I have a 10-year-old daughter who I try to frame these things for. And uh when she asked me, you know, can I get this? And I'm looking at it, going, sure, of course you can. I'd love that. I'd love to help you get that. But we can't get this other thing that you asked me for, you know? And she's like, oh, but I want them both. And I said, but that's I that's the nature of things. You have to have a trade-off. We have this is a budget for fun that we can have. And, you know, there's a certain point in time that you have to see that trade-off. But it's hard to see that. One of the things that for myself was a very valuable thing is that earlier in my life, I had a time period of scarcity and where I realized that things weren't finite. Because for my daughter, she's had a period of relative, you know, mommy and daddy always helped her out with things. And we budgeted well. So she was like, well, we just go to the bank and get that. And there's this idea that the bank has this limitless, is this place of like, you know, and I think that uh it didn't help that we watched uh Harry Potter when she was a kid, and there was like the vault with just all this these galleons hidden away in there. She's like, so it's just got this endless amount of money in there. And I was like, Well, not really. We have to kind of look at what we make, and then mommy and daddy have to spend money. But to be able to talk to her this way, I've always tried to look for a way to speak to her about things like this. But but I want to ask you more about your me money method because to me, it sounds more aligned with how my brain thinks. And how can someone figure out whether their spending actually matches the life they want?

SPEAKER_01 24:13

Well, I think it's more not what the life they want, but it does your spending reflect what matters to you, right? So if you if you said, I have this much money to spend and this is my discretionary money that I'm bucketing for my meme money, and part of that's gonna be for my Mexican food, right? And so you're going out to eat for Mexican food and that's what you really want, but then something else comes up and you're like, man, but I really want this too. Well, then you have to make a decision, just like your daughter did, right?

SPEAKER_00 24:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 24:47

Which one do I value more? Do I go out to eat again for Mexican food or do I not so that I can save up and get this other thing? Right. And and so then you're you're choosing things that reflect what you're valuing. You're saying, is my money worthy of this purchase? Well, it is until it's not, right? It is, it's worthy of buying the Mexican food until you realize there's something you want more than Mexican food. And if you don't have that boundary, then you're saying yes to both things, and then you end up spending more money than you should, right? But you're prioritizing and having that separate money lets you have intention and awareness and a simple thought process behind it so that you're just pausing before you buy something, before you make that purchase or that decision. So it's just creating this intentional space. Um, and it gives you the freedom to spend within that amount without having to answer to anyone, not even yourself, because sometimes we're the only the people telling ourselves no, right? The money's there and you want something, you'd be like, the money's there, I can do it. I already have permission to spend it. But if you're spending more, then you have to make the choices on what you value more. Is it worthy of this, or is this this item I'm thinking of not really worthy of my me money? Because I want to spend it on something that's more important to me.

SPEAKER_00 26:11

I love that. I think that um one of the ways I frame this, and I talk about this a lot in the podcast for my daughter, is uh a backpack and the zombie apocalypse. And this is the way I teach it to my daughter. Because at the end of the day, we all have a uh a limited amount of stuff, you know. So I talked to my daughter, like, let's imagine that you have a backpack and you can only put some things inside your backpack. Like, if you're gonna get this, you can't get that. If you're gonna do this, you gotta change that because there's a finite amount of space and we have a finite amount of resources. And she was sitting there and I said, okay, put in, I I use it to teach needs versus wants, but also uh it works for something like this too, because when I say, all right, well, we've got all the stuff we need, but now we still have some space at the top for stuff we want. What do you want? You know, I she's like, I want this and I want this. It's like, oh, but you can only have 10 items. Like that's our that's our limit right now. And she has to think really carefully about what she really wants. And because, you know, and there's different number of things we can do and get, but there is a limit, you know, and that's not to say that you can't have it in the future, but you got to think about it because month to month, there's, you know, you have that time frame to look at stuff. But I think that one of the hardest things for me as well, and I see this in my daughter, was there is this mindset of like, well, there's always more, there's always more. Instead of realizing that there is a limit. Like, if I open up my my wallet, how much money do I have in there at that moment? Like, that's a hard cap until I go withdraw more, and then there's a hard cap in my bank account. And if I can't conceptualize that. And one of the things that I want to go back to from the beginning of the podcast that I talked about was that I think as we get more and more digital, it's harder for people to conceptualize that at times, you know, like I've got this inanimate number in my account. Uh, I remember when I first started learning personal finance, my teacher when in high school was like trying to teach us the envelope method. Like, here is your paper money. And we divide it up, and it was really easy to see this is what I have. And I think that one of the things that's been hard for me as I've gotten older is as I don't see things leaving my hands as much. It's just it flows from direct deposits and things through cards and such. I don't know, it's just harder for me to keep track of. So that's something that I personally have to work on. And I don't know, it's tricky for me.

SPEAKER_01 28:49

Absolutely. No, it is. And there are some banks now that allow you to bucket like the envelopes inside of an of a bank account so you can have like different little envelopes in one account. But then other people I've worked with, I've actually had them open separate bank accounts. Like this is your bank account for your car fund. Like right now, um you're, you know, you're this is where you put your money that you pay your car out of. And then when your car payment is done, then you keep paying that car payment into there so that the next time you need your car needs fixed or you need to buy a new car, whatever, you have the money already built up. That's all everything that's in there just goes to your car, right? And then another fund for vacation, like we'll, you know, put however much you're gonna put in there. So some people that works for. Again, that doesn't work for everybody. You have to figure out what is gonna work for you and how you compartmentalize and and interact with money. Um, and I think that the envelope method and having it be paper is so concrete, right? And it and it really helps you to see that. And these days, think about I mean, we have context. So I'm not sure how old you are, but my context going back, like I remember layaway, right? I remember when you went to the store and you got the thing you wanted and they put it in the back room with your name on it. Oh my god. And then you went in every month and you made a payment towards it, but you didn't get the thing until you paid it off. And think about how backwards we are now. Now we literally go on our phone, push, send it to me now, and it shows up at your door a couple hours later, basically. And then but you haven't even actually paid for it yet. Like it is so completely backwards, and so we have context, but the kids today don't have that context.

SPEAKER_00 30:39

Yeah, they don't, I forgot about lay away. It is such a better like way of doing it though. But like, yeah, I think people I remember, you know, getting my first credit card and going in the negative and not even realizing that it was in, I thought I just got this extra cash and it was in college, and then I just spent and then didn't realize oh, that has to be paid back because no one talked about it and they were just there. Um luckily I hear they're not doing that anymore, signing up people for credit cards on college campuses.

SPEAKER_01 31:09

They well, I my sons, my sons get stuff in the mail all the time. Sign up for this credit card. Um but yeah, and and so there's a there's a viral video out there too of a a girl who had Apple Pay on her phone and she was just she thought it was like points. She was like, Oh, Apple Pay, Apple Pay, I must have a ton of points. And then she got her credit card bill. She was like, Oh my god, I had no idea. She was just thought she had Apple points and was paying with Apple Pay. The the concept is just so it's so easy for kids these days to not understand and get caught up in it. It's different than the way uh than the way I grew up.

SPEAKER_00 31:47

Yeah, I 100% agree. Well, I want to ask you this too, because speaking of how you grew up and you've reinvented yourself multiple times throughout your life. How did those personal experiences change the way you coach people around money and self-worth?

SPEAKER_01 32:03

Well, here's the thing: I have lived many, many different money lives. My my money history is very vast. So um I grew up with my parents not talking about money. Um, I knew there wasn't a lot of money. They lived paycheck to paycheck. Then I also lived paycheck to paycheck when I got money for doing jobs. I would just work when I wanted money and then get, I didn't have a regular allowance. And then I would just spend it. I never saved. Then I was a teenage, sing single teenage mom scraping by, figuring it out, paying my taxes before I was old enough to vote. Then I was a married mom of three, living in the suburbs. And then um, you know, I then I actually had money and I was uh living in a very nice house, and then I got divorced and had to scrape it all back together. And now I'm in a blended marriage and recreating myself again. But here's the thing: I have had so many different shifts and rebuilding periods and money relationships that I have this ability to like meet people where they are with compassion and understand where they've been. So sometimes you go talk to um a financial advisor or a financial coach or somebody, and they only have like their life and and they might try to understand it different ways, but I've I've actually been there. I've been a lot of these different places. Um, and it it just allows me to have a better connection um with people at different phases of life.

SPEAKER_00 33:33

I I think that that's so much better to have that level of richness. You know, and I think that that's something that I talk to financial advisors about. As we get more AI tools, as we get more things, like at the end of the day, people need the human sitting opposite them. And I think that the more experiences that you've had, the more you can actually connect with people and relate to them and say, hey, I I've been there. I understand this. I have also journeyed through. I mean, I remember in when I was younger, there was a day that I did not have any cash in my bank account. I had a certain amount of money and I had to figure out how to get myself food or my dog food. I went and got my dog food, and my mom just had that six cents. She knew something was wrong, and she's just like, I just sent you $100 in your bank account. And I'm like crying, but like having to make that choice about whether to feed myself or feed my dog that day, and I fed my dog, it was something that will always stick with me. And I never want to go back to that place ever, ever again. And I think that like that richness is something that's powerful. But you know, I I love something that I've seen in your content, and the idea that people are often waiting for permission financially. Why do so many adults still struggle to trust themselves with money decisions?

SPEAKER_01 35:01

Well, that goes back to the financial confidence, right? And I think it's it's uh learning that you don't need to be perfect before you can start participating, right? I think they they feel like if they start with one thing, they have to do it all and it's overwhelming. So the idea that you can build trust with yourself through the building those little habits and practice, not perfection, and working towards some things as you go. And and don't be afraid to reach out and talk to somebody about it, right? To get a coach or an advisor, but make sure you're getting somebody who is understanding where you're coming from and not just overwhelming you or talking down to you. Make sure that you're working with somebody that is leaning into who you are and working with you rather than not just telling you what to do.

SPEAKER_00 35:56

I like that because I think that we need to find people who can understand where we're at, understand our subtle nuances, what makes you tick and what makes you freeze up, you know. I did a lot of sports in high school and college. And one of the things that I found from a great coach is that they knows what can help you win, but they also know what can shut you down. Because I've seen some of the greatest players I know that get triggered by something and then they just they turn off and they they shut down. And a great coach can be the person who can help you can continue to show up. And I think that that's one of the things that I've had with great financial planners and seeing is that they're people that help people keep showing up, keep on making the right decisions or at least informed decisions, because it's not always easy and it's not always right. And um, you know, I I think it's interesting because um there's still a lot of people who think financial, like becoming financially successful means sacrificing happiness or enjoyment. And I want to ask you this because it's something you alluded to, but like with my Mexican food, do you think it's possible to be both financially responsible and actually enjoy your life?

SPEAKER_01 37:11

I do. And that's that's exactly why I created the me money method, because that gives you the permission to spend that money on yourself, right? To have those things that you that you really love to do or to have or whatever it is, whatever your thing is, that's your money for you, your me money. You just spend it on me. And it allows you to have that joy and not sacrifice that. Yes, you you have boundaries. Yes, you have um, you know, limits that you need to stay in so that that you are financially responsible, but it it gives you that permission. So um, you know, if you're someone who who's who's more of a spender and likes to spend more, you're just gonna have to start making better choices. If you're someone who's a saver and feels guilty spending money on yourself, it's gonna you're you're gonna allow yourself to enjoy that without feeling the guilt or shame that you spend money on yourself. But it's within a boundary and it's making uh space for you to be intentional and and and put more um thought into what you're spending it on.

SPEAKER_00 38:15

I really love that. Well, I want to ask one last question. If somebody listening feels overwhelmed, embarrassed, or like financially behind right now, what's one simple thing they could start doing this week to feel more confident and in control?

SPEAKER_01 38:28

I always tell people to start with knowing their cash flow, right? Their cash flow is what's coming in and what's going out. And this isn't meant to be judgment or make any decision. It's just understand. Your cash flow is like your dashboard of your car, right? You don't need to understand how the engine of the car works, but you need to see how fast you're going, how much gas you have, if your car's gonna overheat, right? That's all you need to know. If you're about to run out of gas, well, guess what? You gotta take a pit stop at the gas station. If your car is about to overheat, something's wrong. You gotta go get it checked out, right? If you're going too fast, you're gonna get pulled over. All you need to know is what's on your dashboard. That's what your cash flow tells you. It tells you, am I going too fast? Am I about to overheat? Am I gonna run out of gas? Right? If you don't know that, you're you're just driving blindly and you're gonna end up in trouble. So I would say that would be the one thing that I would say is just start knowing what's going in, what's got going out, and then start thinking about you know, am I am I saving? Am I spending? Like what could I be doing differently? Do I see things that are coming through? Like you said, you don't pay attention to them. Are there things I signed up for that I don't even remember I'm paying for? You know? Um, I think that would be the biggest thing.

SPEAKER_00 39:46

I love that. Uh, I think that personally there's things that I've signed up for that I forgot about. And that's something that recently I went through and just started canceling a bunch of stuff. And it was helpful. Well, where can people go to find out more about you and what you do?

SPEAKER_01 40:02

Sure. They can go to my website, lynda grizz.com, l-in d a g-r-i-z dot com. And on there they can find uh at my speaking. So financial wellness speaking for organizations or associations, anyone who wants to have their people get better with money. And I also do one on one uh financial coaching.