Some things are just worth repeating and our need to learn from our triggers and forgive ourselves for EVERYTHING are among them. And both are such an important part of this self-discovery journey that we are on.
Our own transformation requires that we acknowledge and accept ALL parts of ourselves and welcome them back to the whole. I share a wonderful story of how this was revealed to a friend and challenge you to do this difficult work in your self-discovery journey.
Please come find me on Instagram and TikTok. If you are enjoying the podcast, please rate and review and share with friends.
Thank you for listening !
Some things are just worth repeating and our need to learn from our triggers and forgive ourselves for EVERYTHING are among them. And both are such an important part of this self-discovery journey that we are on.
Our own transformation requires that we acknowledge and accept ALL parts of ourselves and welcome them back to the whole. I share a wonderful story of how this was revealed to a friend and challenge you to do this difficult work in your self-discovery journey.
Please come find me on Instagram and TikTok. If you are enjoying the podcast, please rate and review and share with friends.
Thank you for listening !
(0:00) Rise and shine, everybody. It's time to wake up with Susan. (0:05) Spiritual awakening can be a beautiful, messy, and sometimes lonely journey.(0:09) So let's do it together. I'm your host, Susan Sutherland. I'm an intuitive healer (0:15) and spiritual mentor.We are all called to rise up above our conditioning and limiting beliefs (0:22) and shine our light on ourselves and others. So let's get to it. (0:28) Hi, family.Thanks for joining me today. We are continuing our self-discovery journey, (0:34) and today we're going to talk about forgiveness. And that was not my plan, and I needed a bit of (0:41) a diversion because I was going to miss this really, really big, important step on our journey.(0:49) And so thankfully, spirit always has my back and kind of brought me through a situation (0:56) to really let me know how important this is and what a timely discussion we are having. (1:04) Because part of the same trinity, we had Hermes who came to teach about alchemy and transmutation. (1:12) We had the Buddha who taught us about karma and rebirth.And we had Jesus who came and taught (1:20) us about forgiveness and the atonement. And here, this is Jesus's big week. This is Easter week, (1:27) and we need to talk about forgiveness.So I was going to skip ahead to these awesome (1:33) interviews that I have for you about different ways to really enhance your self-discovery, (1:40) about really using amazing knowledge that is out there, the astrology and the jinkies, (1:49) to really embrace who you are and understand what your blueprint is. And I was just jumping over (1:56) forgiveness. So thankfully, I was righted, the ship was righted, and here we are.And I want to tell (2:03) you how this happened. Because in A Course in Miracles, first of all, a miracle is when you (2:11) change from thinking with your egoic, small-S self, to thinking with your big-S self, your higher self, (2:21) and allowing God's mind to be the mind that you think with, that you are witnessing with. (2:29) And that's what a miracle is.And so A Course in Miracles is a shift in mindset. And that's what (2:36) we're working on in the daily practice. And what we're doing right now, in A Course in Miracles, (2:41) is choosing to see our grievances in a new light.Choosing to exchange grievances for miracles, (2:52) which is saying, I choose not to see the issues I have with that person. And basically saying, (2:59) show me a new way to see this. I choose to have a miracle.I choose to see this differently. I (3:06) choose to see it through my higher self and release my desire to hold on to this grievance. (3:14) And so that's the practice that we've been going through.And I had one of the book club members (3:22) reach out to me and she was really struggling. And she's going through the practice and (3:29) basically confessed and said, I can do this. I can let go all of my grievances except for one person.(3:38) And I'm sitting here and I'm trying so hard to see them in a different light, but I don't. (3:45) I don't see them in a different light. I am festering and boiling like thinking of (3:52) his name makes my blood boil.Can we please talk about this? And so we set up a time to talk about (4:01) the situation. And I did, by the way, get clearance for sharing this, which was really important (4:08) um, for her that, that her journey is now going to hopefully help others. But anyway, (4:15) so she gave me a call and we were talking about this.And as she's communicating to me, (4:22) she's telling me that she cannot let it go because this person is taking advantage of her mother. (4:30) And her mother is vulnerable. She, she's not got dementia, but she has some memory issues.(4:35) She feels like this person is intentionally taking advantage of her mother and it makes her so angry (4:45) and, and try as she might with these lessons. And we're sitting here, we're trying so hard, (4:51) like show me a different way to see this person. She's like, I can't do it.I see this person and (4:57) I get angry and I get fired up inside. And so we talked about it a little bit and she told me (5:03) about the circumstances. The messages I was receiving as I was talking to her is this is (5:11) not about him.It's not about him. And you guys, I can't tell you how often that is the case. (5:21) It's an inside job.Everything, everything, everything, everything is an inside job. (5:28) And so I had to say to her, when have you taken advantage of people? When have you taken advantage (5:35) of people who might've been vulnerable? When have you acted inappropriately for your advantage? (5:43) And she got quiet and a few seconds later, she was like, I already know what this is about. (5:51) And I told her to take some time with it, that this isn't to be rushed through, (5:56) but, but there's something, he's mirroring something that is creating this kind of a (6:02) response.Now it doesn't mean that if you ever see somebody taking advantage of somebody, (6:06) then that means you have work to do. But if you have a visceral response to something, (6:11) it is meant to get your attention. It is meant to have you look within.That is creating this (6:21) response, which led her to ask me about it, which led to this conversation, which led to her crying (6:30) and journaling and finally letting out a lot of times when her young self acted really (6:38) inappropriately in so many ways that she's not proud of. She is an incredible human being now, (6:46) and that's not what you want to associate with. That's, that's who you leave behind.(6:50) You leave that person in the corner, but that reaction, the reaction to this man and how he's (6:57) treating her mother, that she's, she's so angry about it. That was her little self saying, hey, (7:05) come get me. I made mistakes too.I made mistakes and we corrected them, but you, you left me. (7:13) You left me. You haven't forgiven me for the times that I really screwed people over.(7:21) I really, I really hurt people, but that's not me anymore. But here I am, like way over here, (7:28) an orphan, as I've read it called, or a fragment of your soul that you are so embarrassed of, (7:36) that you're so ashamed of, that you feel so much guilt about, that you've left, you've cast them (7:42) aside. And that's all he needed her to see, is there have been times when she's done that, (7:51) and now she's cast herself aside and, and the forgiveness, the forgiveness that she was sitting (7:58) there trying so hard to see if she could reach for him, that forgiveness is required of herself.(8:07) And so she spent the past couple of days really, really purging, really letting out all of those (8:15) instances where she acted inappropriately. She took advantage of people and I checked in with (8:25) her this morning. They kind of came to me, hey, reach out.And I checked in with her and she told (8:32) me how it went. And that she's just been crying and crying and crying and just getting all of (8:37) this stuff out and, you know, was complaining to her husband how hard healing is. And I had (8:43) the opportunity to tell her, hey, girl, you are not alone.This has been part of my journey too. (8:50) There, there was a span of seven years where, goodness gracious alive, (8:57) that was, that was a girl making some bad decisions. I was making bad decisions and, (9:05) you know, didn't really care about other people's feelings, other people's things.You know, (9:12) I was, I was harmful. And what I really had to do is go and say, what was I, what was I trying to (9:21) get? What was I missing at that time that I thought I would gain by this? Sometimes it was (9:28) people's approval. Like if I act bad for the group of kids that I think are cool, who I see as kind (9:38) of naughty, then maybe I garner their approval.What am I seeking? What was I seeking in those (9:45) moments? Because there's a reason we do everything and it's, it's from a lack. You're trying to (9:51) provide something to yourself that you don't have. And it's really trying to understand what was (9:57) missing from me at that time.And when you can do that with compassion, which we've talked about (10:04) and understand the why, it helps you kind of integrate that orphan, integrate that soul (10:10) fragment and say, hey, this was a mistake that required correction, which I don't do any of (10:18) those things now. I definitely know better, but it is not a sin that requires punishment. It is not (10:26) a sin that requires you to isolate part of yourself, to, to leave it in the shame closet forever.(10:35) We have to not only be able to witness all parts of ourselves, but a really, really important part (10:47) of the process that I nearly skipped over is forgiveness. And I told her when we were talking, (10:55) I guarantee you that when you do this, when you go through the process of getting this out of, (11:05) of recognizing the parts of you who have taken advantage of people, and this is just her (11:13) situation, but if you have anybody out there that you feel like you can't forgive for a small (11:21) injustice or a great injustice, I challenge you now to say, when I, when have I behaved like that? (11:30) Because there's a part of you that needs forgiven, forgiving. There's a part of you that needs to be (11:38) forgiven.And when you do that, you're able to forgive them, to sit with them and their energy (11:47) and understand that you too made mistakes and wish not to be held accountable for decisions you (11:55) made 10 years ago, or even decisions you might've made Thursday, because we do make mistakes. (12:03) And when you're able to find the part of you that still requires your forgiveness, your heart (12:11) softens to those who are just providing a mirror, just providing a witness for you to say, (12:19) hey, there's work for you to do. There's something still in there.So this week, I'm really going to (12:26) challenge you to do a little exercise and think of all of those people that you hold grievances (12:35) against. That, that really, when you think of forgiving everybody in the world, (12:41) there are just a couple of situations that you can't move past. Write them down (12:47) and then take a little time and do some self-reflection.This is self-discovery week (12:54) where we are challenging ourselves to look really, really deep at the parts of you that you've cast (13:03) aside that you haven't been willing to face in order to forgive. That's what I'm calling you to (13:12) do this week. Open the closet.There is nothing you can do or have done or have chosen or believed (13:25) that puts you outside of God. So allow the relationships that you have (13:35) to reflect back to you. Where are those parts of me? Where are those parts of me that I've run from? (13:42) I do not want to own up to that.I'm not that person anymore. So I'm leaving her way behind. (13:50) You got to go back and get them.That's part of you. It's a beautiful part that you needed to get (13:56) you where you are now. You learned those lessons and you can have compassion for other people who (14:02) make mistakes because you made them too.That's not a problem. That's growth. That is growth.(14:12) But you got to go collect your little orphans and so make your list of those with grievances (14:19) and then allow yourself to really reflect on what that is mirroring back to you. When have you done (14:26) something similar? When have you made somebody else feel the way you feel? When you think about (14:34) that person or the feelings that you assign to them that they are causing you to feel this way? (14:42) When have you caused somebody else to feel that way? It's a big job. It's a big job to go and do (14:53) this.And what was really beautiful is when she was texting me, I was like, oh, this is actually (15:00) a podcast episode. It was meant to be here during this week. And she felt so good that her days of (15:08) crying and really allowing so much to come up.And for her, it's been a really beautiful, (15:15) I mean, she would not say right now it's beautiful, but she will in three weeks. (15:20) It's been a beautiful process of allowing it to come up and perhaps issuing apologies to those (15:27) people. And if you think of how the 12-step programs work, this is a big chunk of it is (15:32) really acknowledging the times when you've hurt other people and issuing those apologies.(15:39) And so that's another part. Another step this week is reach out. Reach out to somebody and (15:47) you don't need a response.You can say, I'm doing some work on me and I just wanted to let you know (15:56) I'm really sorry for how this happened. I'm really sorry for what I did. I'm sorry for how I made you (16:01) feel.And you don't need anything in return. Understand that this is an inside job. You are (16:10) allowing the release of guilt, of shame, and you're transmuting anger that you have for other people (16:24) that you think are doing you wrong, that you cannot release those grievances.You are allowing (16:30) to shift, maybe not from anger to love, but maybe from anger to acceptance. And just in doing these (16:38) exercises, you are lifting your vibration. You are pulling yourself up out of those low vibration (16:46) feelings.And it might just be pockets of resistance that you have in your energetic body. (16:51) But I told her I can already feel her energetic body lifting with the work she's doing. And it (16:59) might be a couple of uncomfortable days.It might be a couple of humbling apologies. But it is going (17:07) to be so worth it for her to go through this journey. And she needed this person.She needed (17:14) this person to make her this fiery mad. So that she could understand that this work was her work. (17:23) And so then when you take somebody that you've been so angry with, and now you're feeling lighter, (17:29) you're feeling freer.She is going to feel gratitude for him. And feeling gratitude towards (17:38) him instead of having her blood boil will absolutely change her experience and her (17:44) interactions with him. Now it doesn't mean that they have to be besties, but I guarantee you (17:51) now that she is understanding that the forgiveness had to be self-forgiveness.And that she is (17:58) shifting from like really angry feelings towards him to feelings of acceptance towards him. It is (18:06) going to completely just transform their relationship. And so in just these conversations, (18:15) she is doing such good work and knows that the situation that she is going through is now going (18:23) to help others.Because I was like, I gotta share this. So you know what? Jesus came to teach us (18:32) forgiveness. And this is his week.So that's what we're talking about. Take it on your heart. (18:38) Do this practice.Do it for yourself. It's a big one. I love you.Have a great week. (18:48) And we will continue our self-discovery journey next week. Thanks for listening.(18:55) Did you enjoy this little nugget? If so, and you're listening on Apple Podcasts, (18:59) can you please take a moment to leave me a rating and or review? You'll click the dots at (19:06) the top right and click go to show and then scroll down below the episodes listings to (19:12) click the five stars and write a review. I appreciate you taking the time to do it. (19:17) That is how other people are able to find the show when they are looking for similar content.(19:23) Thanks so much and have a great week.