Keep Hope Alive Podcast
Keep Hope Alive through the power of knowing who you are as a person and expressing self-love. Life is a journey and with the blank pages we create our story. Keep Hope Alive is about the power of knowledge in today's world. ALL topics are welcomed.
Keep Hope Alive Podcast
Money Choices After Heartbreak: A Divorce Recovery Roadmap
Shell Sawyer transformed her own devastating divorce experience into a mission to guide others through the financial maze of marriage dissolution. As a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, divorce coach, and mediator with over 20 years in the financial services industry, Shell brings compassionate expertise to a process that leaves most people feeling overwhelmed and alone.
"Even though my background was in finance, I had a hard time making decisions during my divorce," Shell reveals, capturing the emotional paralysis that affects even financially savvy individuals. This vulnerability makes her approach uniquely powerful—she understands both the technical requirements and the emotional landscape of divorce recovery.
What separates Shell's methodology from typical financial advice is her holistic vision of post-divorce life. Beyond just splitting assets, she helps clients envision their next chapter, ensuring settlements are not just legally sound but financially sustainable. "Understanding the short and long-term implications of divorce decisions is crucial," she explains, noting how tax consequences can make seemingly fair divisions deeply imbalanced.
Shell's book, "You Are Not Alone: Your Guide for When Divorce is on Your Doorstep," offers practical templates, checklists, and compassionate guidance for those navigating divorce. Her approach combines financial recovery coaching with emotional support, helping clients develop sustainable budgets and emergency funds while acknowledging the grief process that accompanies the end of a marriage.
The path to recovery involves rediscovering yourself through self-care, rebuilding support networks, and finding new purpose. As Shell beautifully articulates, "I look at my last divorce, even though it was hard, as a gift to me. I never would have been able to do some of the things I do now." Ready to transform your divorce experience from purely painful to an opportunity for financial empowerment and personal growth? Shell offers 30-minute complimentary consultations to start your journey toward a brighter future.
Brice Harney
Life On Record
Miles of Smiles Entertainment
Richmond Punch
TK Hair Salon
Ogden Ventures LLC
CEO of Ogden Ventures LLC
SnappBandZ
Disclaimer: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase, I may receive a commission at no extra cost to you.
Love & Light - Keep Hope Alive
Hello and welcome. To Keep Huffle Live podcast Today, I got Michelle Sawyer here. Welcome, welcome. First of all, thank you for having me. Oh, you're welcome, she. She is a CEO, president and author and we're going to be diving into everything that she does. She's so talented and I love this topic we're going to be talking about today because I think everybody goes through it. But before we even get started, a quick question Out of the past five years, how many weddings have you been to?
Speaker 2:I think one yeah One In the past five years, unfortunately Right. I love weddings.
Speaker 1:I love weddings too. I really do, and I'm a professional photographer, certified wedding planner, so I've been to so many weddings in my life but they've slowed down greatly. So, yeah, what's going?
Speaker 2:on with that.
Speaker 1:I don't know. I think we need some divorce parties.
Speaker 2:That's probably true. You might get some business, yeah.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, definitely. So, when you go into the wedding part, there is something for you to sign to let the couple know that you were there. What are you signing?
Speaker 2:The guest book yes, yes, perfect.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes. So one of our biggest sponsors here is Life on Record and what they do. Instead of the guest book, they have a vintage rotary phone that your guests can come in. They'll walk up to the phone. Now there's two options. They can pick up the rotary phone and leave a message Congratulations on your big day, we're so excited for you. Or maybe it's like a groomsman and they're going hey, dude, it's about time to put a ring on her finger. I'm so excited for you too. Right next to it is a QR code that your guests can take out their cell device and scan it and leave a message on their phone, if that's what they wish. But what they do is they collect all these messages from your friends, your family, and they burn it either on a 12-inch vinyl record or they have a keepsake speaker and it's all personalized, so you get to have all those messages.
Speaker 1:Now I always use weddings as an example, but it could be for birthday parties, corporate events, anniversaries I like funerals, and also, if you are in a sports team, I use this. One of the kids broke his leg Team members. I gave the phone number to call and wish him to get well. So it's great. Now their plans only start at $99. Now you get to keep the phone number Number. You got to return that phone. Even though, as cute as it is, the phone has to be returned. But to get more information on Life on Record, visit them at wwwlifeonrecordcom. All right, well, let's get started. We got this. So my question now is who is Shell Sawyer, and I love your first name.
Speaker 2:Thank you. Who is Shell Sawyer? Well, that isn't that a good question, right? Who am I? I, um, I'm a person who was um, who her dad was her hero. Um, I really enjoyed having my dad, um, for my most of my life. Unfortunately, he's passed away. I wish I had a recording of his voice. Um, that would have been nice. Yeah, I love that. Yeah, that would have been nice. Yeah, I love that. Yes, yeah, that would have been good. So I, yeah, I grew up.
Speaker 2:He was a very much a money person. He dealt with his finance. He taught me so much about finances when I was growing up and I was such a lucky girl that way, and so when it was time for me to go to school and get and go to college, finance was my natural choice. I became an accountant. I got my master's in accounting, I worked over 20 years in the financial services industry and then we went through a divorce.
Speaker 2:I've actually been through two, but my second one was devastating because I did have a daughter with him and I felt very overwhelmed during the whole process and, even though my background was in finance, I had a hard time making decisions. So you know, some days I didn't even want to get out of bed, let alone make decisions for my future and my daughter's future out of bed, let alone make decisions for my future and my daughter's future. And I wish I had somebody by my side that could help me with that. So when everything was all said and done and you know, the fog had kind of cleared after my divorce and it was final, I said what can I do to help through divorce? So now I'm a certified divorce financial analyst that's a mouthful CDFA. I'm also a certified divorce coach and mediator. So I help people make good decisions in their divorce and hold their hand the whole way so they can make some good decisions and if they need a little help, they've got the support in me.
Speaker 1:I'll be the first to admit wow, my first marriage. It ended two days before our eight-year wedding anniversary. I was so blindsided, oh gosh, it hurt. But my financial decisions, my goodness, I wish I had you in my corner. I never knew there was anybody there to help guide, you know, with, you know making those decisions, because all I could think is okay, I'm picking up where her dad is missing. So I want to take her to the movies. I want her to go to play putt-putt or bowling. I want to do her to the movies. I want her to go to play putt-putt or bowling. I want to do this and that. And I opened up a credit card and it was just like stupid. Me was so young and I have to call me stupid because I wasted so much money and it hurt me in the long run. So where were you?
Speaker 2:I might have even hurt her. I was probably going through my own divorce at that time, um, but like not not being financially like independent and, you know, having your own finances in order uh, probably hurt her a little bit too. You know, like, maybe she got to have a lot of fun, but she probably felt mom pinching her pennies at times too. Right, yeah.
Speaker 1:Well, she was too young to know that, I think.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, that's good. It's just, you know, we learn we, we learn finances from how we grow up, right? There's nothing else really that teaches us anything is, it's usually our parents that teach us and then maybe some life experiences, but they don't teach a lot of it like in school, right? Um, maybe how to write a check. I don't even know if they'd even do that anymore I never learned that at school, yeah yeah, me either.
Speaker 1:No, I was and I wish they did more of training. So my dad I didn't learn anything on finances through my dad, but my mom she would always make comments, so you need to save your money for this and that. And I remember when I was engaged she's like can you skip the wedding and I buy you a house? I stupidly said no.
Speaker 2:I was like man looking back right yeah.
Speaker 1:It was like can. I try again.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I love it, that's good. I love that, though, that she gave you that option.
Speaker 1:She gave you that option yeah, yeah, because we spend so much money on weddings right um.
Speaker 2:Oh, yes, yes, but you know and plan yeah, I was planning.
Speaker 1:At age 14 I would. I knew I wanted to be a certified um. Well, when I was younger, I played Barbies and my Barbies were always getting married. But I wanted to help people with their weddings. So, and then, when I was like 16, I bought a poster board. I had all the magazines for bridal and I made a vision board. This is where my wedding's going to be, these are the colors, these are the flowers, this is what my cake's going to look like. And I rolled it up and I put it in my closet top shelf and when I got proposed to, I think I was like 20. No, yeah, 20. So I took that poster board out from all those years and half of it was already correct. My dresses were on cue, the flowers were on cue and I got married at a golf um club and it was the same entryway and everything. It was beautiful.
Speaker 2:But you predicted your wedding.
Speaker 1:That's cool yeah, it was like you had an idea right, and that was what you stuck with well, you know, it's something.
Speaker 1:Know, I interviewed a lady who talks about manifest and she's wonderful because, oh my gosh, she's so right. I really had to like I did manifest when I was younger. I manifest about jobs as I got older, Like here's the great thing, I manifest, I really want to move to Oklahoma. And then just like that, and I said I am going to get a job. I like sent so many applications and I kept saying, no, this one I got it. I feel like I got it. And it was just the wonderful feeling and he hired me yesterday for my interview.
Speaker 2:Wonderful Congratulations and you manifested that. Yes, I believe in manifestation too. Right, you have to have some action involved with the manifestation, but yeah, I believe in it. The positive thinking, right.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah. So I mean, and with people going through a divorce I would say, if you set those mindset goals, just kind of redirect everything, because that hurt is real after divorces.
Speaker 1:I mean, all I had was a wine bottle and Michael Buble. And then I saw Michael Buble three times in concert and my favorite song was Home. And I remember the stage. I was like in the middle of the crowd but it pulled out to the middle and he was like right in front of me and he sang Home. I was like wow, this is amazing.
Speaker 2:He helped you get through your divorce. He really did. Yeah, michael Buble, yeah.
Speaker 1:So, michael, if you hear this on my podcast, let's interview you get him on here, you can manifest it.
Speaker 2:yes, yes, yeah, start contacting his people now out. Yeah, definitely yeah.
Speaker 1:So what like okay. So this goes back to when you were growing up with parents and they were teaching you the finances. I remember for me, if I did hear anything, it was just like no, I didn't want to like have that responsibility or something. That was my mindset and I know everybody's different, but you know, for you, you took it, you ran with it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I did, I liked it, and I think that that's probably the key. You probably, just like a lot of people, don't like finances, right, like hear it, and they're just like la, la, la, like I'm not interested, especially as a kid, right, who wants to sit at the table with their father and go over his finances. Right, I did, I'll admit it, but not everybody's like that. I have a daughter I don't. She would never sit with me and talk about finances. I think every time I start talking about it she's like oh no, here mom goes again. Right, that's how my daughter is. I noticed that it sticks. So, even though I don't think she's listening, I do notice she has. She has been right, she's been applying some things. She understands a little bit, so I'm glad, right, yeah, that is really good from me.
Speaker 1:She's not a finance person like I was. I think she follows honestly more of her dad's line, more than mine. And then I see my son. He does follow me in so many different ways, except I never played sports.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's played sports.
Speaker 1:He's good at sports yeah, yeah, he's played sports. He's good at sports football, yes, very, very good, yeah so, and he has an arm. I mean I think he could eventually play baseball if he liked it, because I've seen him throw a ball fast and I'm like whoa, I was like I don't want any baseball coaches to know he can throw fast.
Speaker 2:Because they will capture him right yeah they're going to make him like baseball. They are. Yeah, I always tried so hard to play sports when I was younger, but I was never very good at it. My family would tell you that Not very good. I tried, though. I even had my father as a basketball coach, but I couldn't make a basket to save my life, so I give him a lot of credit. I don't know how they do it right.
Speaker 1:I don't know, I tried everything or you don't right.
Speaker 2:You have the ability or you don't know, or you don't right. You have the ability or you don't.
Speaker 1:I did gymnastics and volleyball and I was like nope and then when I got older, at my apartment complex they played volleyball in the pool and I loved it. I played. The kids all had one end to swim and the adults took the other end to play volleyball.
Speaker 2:Volleyball is fun yeah that's still not good at. It sounds like you are, so now I know where she got his athletic ability from.
Speaker 1:I almost got my nose broken by one of the throws so I yeah yeah, it missed about like that much and I like, but it didn't hit my face. Thank God I was able to maneuver it and I remember the guy who did it. He was like I'm so, so sorry, Let me take you out to dinner. I was like dinner, but he made a joke because he was just a neighbor that I didn't know. And we went to Olive Garden and he told the hostess well, I'm going to sit on this side, she's going to sit on this side, and I was like what, How's that a dinner? I was like is this guy being serious? But we turned out to be friends later on, which was nice.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, but like I want to also dive in, so with the financial and focusing on is it just women? Are you doing men and women?
Speaker 2:Well, I do mediation, so that's like taking a couple, being a third party neutral, and helping them through the divorce process. Yes, everything is is either men or women. Whoever would like help, right? I would say the majority is women, just because I feel like women make a lot of emotional decisions during divorce and they would like to know a little bit about the finances. And the finances can be a little scary, right. Are you going to be financially okay after the divorce? Right? What have I? You know, what did my state laws require of me? How much can I get? You know that every state is different, right, they have their own laws. So, knowing that ahead of time, getting yourself educated and planning you know you were talking about weddings, right? Just kind of piggyback off of that. Like we plan for our weddings, right, we sometimes years. It sounds like you were planning for many, many years before you actually got married. Right, but no one plans for divorce, right?
Speaker 1:No, they don't.
Speaker 2:No. Sometimes they just like jump right into the arena, Right Well.
Speaker 1:I hate to say it, after the first divorce you might be planning.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, you might be planning during the whole marriage, right, but I, I slowly, I am a planner myself. Anyways, I'm a Capricorn. I don't know, you know, if it comes natural to Capricorns, because everything I read about Capricorns is that we are planners, right.
Speaker 2:So, I think that's in by nature. That's what I do, and I help people kind of plan for their divorce right, making sure they understand what they need in their next chapter right, not just what they want. An attorney can help with what you want and they can get it for you. They can negotiate it, but making sure it's affordable is a really big piece of this right. Make sure it's affordable. Understand the different laws. What are you entitled to? Iping, I help people come up with good settlement solutions for them, right.
Speaker 1:What's going to?
Speaker 2:be the best settle and then negotiating. So I hold their hand during the whole divorce process, helping them along the way, helping them negotiate a good settlement option, helping them understand, you know, the short and long-term implications of the decisions they're making. A lot of times there's tax implications that people have to be very aware of, because even if it's a 50-50 state, it might look like 50-50 on paper but it might not be in reality, because there might be some implications that you need to just be aware of either short or long yeah yeah yeah
Speaker 2:really being educated, right? I highly recommend that, um, when you're entering the divorce arena, because it's a place where I I think that most of us, right, we hope for the best and we hope it's not going to be us. We're not going to be a statistic, right, but then when it does fall on your lap or on your doorstep, being prepared is like one of the best things you can do for yourself, because being prepared helps you have a little less fear of what's going to happen, right, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, less fear of what's going to happen, right, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think that's true with anything, right yeah?
Speaker 1:Like I remember I did have a mediator and they walked me through the basic steps and everything, but I had to learn on my own and it was it's so foolish of me and it's maybe because I was so young when I was married, nobody told me in this time of need and the money I was making, of course having a second income, I had no worry about the food and shopping and stuff like that. Do you ever help coach, like, even when they're like after they're done, especially women, because I know it was hard for me to learn? Oh there's food stamps. Oh there's helping courses to go back in school, oh there's this. You know, it's just those little things, and I wish people like could have told me this is okay If you have children and you're going to get the child support, how to divvy that out too.
Speaker 1:Because you know I was like oh my gosh, you know this will help pay the rent and everything. But in my head it's always been this from a kid and I need to put money away and use it. So I told myself back in the day that's what I'm going to do when clothes are needed. We're going to go get the clothes. You know, just do a shopping day, but then, kind of because it was two times out of the month, I divvied it up Like let's help with some of the bills also and then do this and this and make sure there was something fun. So I feel like I was responsible. But however, like, even though it was my goal that I wanted to start a savings, it was always hard to do.
Speaker 2:Sure, yeah, I love that you mentioned that, because one of my services that I offer is being a financial recovery coach, and that's for people who have gone through divorce and they're like now, what, what do I do with my finances? Right, how do I make the most of my money? Because, most of you know, in in a marriage, right, you have most of time two incomes supporting a house, and now you have your income supporting a whole new house, right, so you're almost like it. It's almost like these two incomes.
Speaker 2:Right now you have two homes that you have to yeah support right, so it's like double what you were doing before for the most part. Um so I offer financial recovery coaching to help people come up with a good budget. I know no one likes to hear the word budget, but it is very important right To see how you're spending your money. It's enlightening, and then let's spend your money wisely, right. Tell your money where to go, instead of your money telling you what to do.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Next chapter right right to make the most of it and save right very important have an emergency fund very important. But how do you do all that right? Yeah, it sounds like you had a good head on your shoulders when you were doing it.
Speaker 1:Well, not always. I wish I did, because I will admit, I was so sad through that divorce and I would think of anything like why two days we were happy, like the week prior, and I just it was just like I thought it was a joke because I was a certified wedding planner. And when he said, you know, I fell out of love with you, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, I was like you're joking, right, Like I thought it was just a mean joke because everything was planned. But, like, going back to where I made my mistake is as sad as I was. That guided me the depression guided me of how to use my finances, and I wish you know there was somebody and you probably do this too, but somebody to be there to make it aware like, hey, you might go through depression, but don't let that be the guide and the answer of just spending Because I thought, oh, let me go get a new shirt for me, that will make me happy.
Speaker 2:I thought oh let me go get a new shirt for me, that will make me happy. Yeah, no, make me feel better. No, no, retail therapy, I think they call that right, exactly it can get you into trouble in the long run too, especially if it lasts for a long time, right, having somebody by your side that's more of a rational thinker, right At that point in time, very, you know, and they don't have stake in it they can help you through that emotional turmoil, right. It's very difficult, exactly, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, it's just like that whole roller coaster, like be careful what you do. I think the best gift I ever gave myself and I wish I paid attention to this stuff and I'm going to say it today because I think it can really help people with the divorce process is the best gift you can give yourself is finding who you are as a person. That means journaling and writing down everything you've been through, that self-love oh my gosh, that's going to make the difference, to make you stronger.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And now-.
Speaker 2:Whatever you can do. You know it's self-care too, right? It's taking care of yourself. And I think, as women too, we have a hard time with that, right, because we're used to taking care of everybody else before we take care of yourself. And I think, as women too, we have a hard time with that, right, because we're used to taking care of everybody else before we take care of ourselves. But during a time like this, that self-love, that self-care is so important, because you're not going to be able to help anybody else if you're not in a good space, right? We probably know that well, right? Oh, yes, yes, yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:You have to take care of yourself in order to be able to take care of anybody else. Like being in an airplane. Right, put the oxygen mask on yourself first and then. Yes, it's the same here, right? Yeah, same thing and you're happy, right like even if it's going outside and walking the dog for a half an hour, do it, you know. Uh, if it's spending time with friends and family, do that, you know.
Speaker 1:Um, make sure, and even if you're, if you're married and you had no friends, like I really didn't have any friends, and I remember the donut shop I met this guy and he was a lot older than me but we became friends and he introduced me to karaoke and when I was 16, I had a sweet 16 birthday and it was karaoke. I love to sing and I just didn't know I was so what's the word In that marriage. I was bottled up and didn't know anything. Really I had no clue. I was like, oh, they got karaoke and I remember going to see what it was like and then I made so many more friends and that's really what helped me get through a lot of this is having that support system.
Speaker 2:And maybe I love that you just brought that up right, because it was almost like a hobby of yours that you started to do again after your marriage, right, and you were able to get out there like. So, whatever your hobby is, for you it's singing, right. Some people might like to, you know. They like to read books, join a book club, you know. Or you like knitting? Find a knitting circle, um, but you can find support groups that you like art, go to an art class, right. There's so many things that are offered out there.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:Definitely help you move forward those are people forward right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like meetupcom was my biggest savior back in the day and I even decided to run the DFW event planning meetup group for eight years and I helped other different vendors, you know, come together in this meeting. I, eight years, and I just it was so touching to me that I was able to organize that and coordinate that. But I've always wanted to do that. But then I learned I wasn't taking care of me and the fact that I was a photographer and I wanted to get out there and make money myself, you know. So it was like we transitioned and we go through what betters us, you know, and the one thing I wish my mom or dad would have told me would be like honey, when you hit 40 years old, you're going to see the world in a whole new light because nobody tells you that.
Speaker 2:And probably if they did tell us, we wouldn't even listen, right, because we're like oh 40. That sounds like so far away. And then it's there, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:And then you actually see the world.
Speaker 2:You think 40s, you know very far away, yeah. And then you're like, oh, this is what they were talking about, oh, yeah it's.
Speaker 1:It's so funny because I'm not gonna hold it back. I've been married three times. The other two they were just very, very not good and I had to get away for safety reasons. I'm going to leave it at that. But even trying right now, at age 47, to kind of because I believe in love, I believe it's out there, but just changing everything and trying to meet somebody, it can be very challenging and very hard. But I notice I make jokes. I'm like, okay, I just need a boyfriend for like three years, because at age 50, I'm going to have menopause and I don't want to deal with a boyfriend hey, that's the truth I am.
Speaker 2:I'm over 50 now and that menopause is not fun. No, no you could have a podcast all about menopause.
Speaker 1:Well, we talked about it. I did one yesterday, you did. Oh, that's awesome.
Speaker 1:It was a really good show too. But it was so funny because, even though I read over it really quick and interviewing, and here's the honest truth, I was just thinking life coach, cycle, the things to watch out, you know. And then she mentioned periods and I was so happy. I was like, wow, this is so cool. So it took me for a full turn. Yeah, so many questions, just sharing stories too. But you know, I think you know like what you're doing and helping everybody out with you know, finding their way, creating a good pathway for them to stay focused guy or girl, it is great and how to really like make your child get through the process too. Do you ever give suggestions if they need counseling?
Speaker 2:Yeah, um, I think therapy is wonderful, right, I'm a huge proponent of that and I think having a therapist by your side during the divorce process is paramount. Um, but, yeah, we go through things like what does a good parenting plan look like, right, and and in my book I actually offer a lot of templates around not just the finances, but also your children, right, and things to think about when you're going through divorce and how to get them through that in the easiest possible way, right, yeah, you mentioned books and I want to talk to you.
Speaker 1:I'm going to say give me one second. I'm going to quickly go into another sponsor commercial really quick and then I'm going to hear all about your book. I'm so excited because I kind of got its limbs up it and I think everybody who's watching this show is just going to love it too. But our second sponsor that I absolutely love and you've probably seen them on Facebook it's called Snap Vans. It's this black bracelet that I have and they come in all different colors.
Speaker 1:Now the word that is on mine is hope. So imagine that keep hope alive. But this is considered a mantra word. Now, on the back they have this elastic that you can pull out and let it thump here against you. It sends a signal to the brain to help you. Now this helps with anxiety, depression, ptsd. It's helped me with sleep. I call it my miracle little bracelet. But with each mantra word they come like peace, love, hope. They just added faith. And here's the tidbit If you want the word faith on your SnapBands bracelet, they have a code. When you're signing out, put K-H and that gives you the word faith. But all the colors they have, the bright rainbowy colors and then they have like your basic black, brown, beige to kind of go with your work outfits and everything.
Speaker 1:I get so many compliments on it and I just love it. I mean, it's so funny. I use it in two places. At church, you know, when I'm saying the prayer I kind of thump it and, just you know, I think to myself what am I grateful and have gratitude for this week, and I love it. It kind of makes me settle and really kind of rested out, um, so, which is nice. The other one is when I'm at the hospital nobody can find a vein, and I was just at the hospital take it off and I'm like, oh my gosh, I want my bracelet. But even without the bracelet on, for my last procedure I just said I really need the best person. Bring me somebody who has an ultrasound, because it takes eight to nine times to find a vein. I feel like a pin cushion and I get bruises all over me.
Speaker 2:I'm not good with that stuff, so I can understand.
Speaker 1:Exactly so, just to wrap it up really quick, all proceeds go to organizations and foundations and charities that you know focus on the anxiety and depression, so I want you guys to go check it out. Their website is at wwwsnapbandscom and that is spelled S-N-A-P-P-B-A-N-D-Zcom, so check them out.
Speaker 2:Yeah, especially if you're going through divorce. I think those bands would be perfect. Yes, yes, yes, yeah.
Speaker 1:I can't even talk. There's my blue bird today. Fearlessness, I like that one. I would be buying that for like a divorce one Like. But you know you've got to have that confidence in you to get through anything and that just shows you right there with fear. Fearlessness that you're in charge, you have the power. Have you ever seen the movie labrath? Oh sorry, go ahead. Have you ever seen the movie labrath? I don't think so. J Jennifer Cullen, david Bowie with the little puppets.
Speaker 2:No, I definitely haven't seen it.
Speaker 1:So at the end. There's one part and I watched this movie several times, but she was like you have no power over me, and that segment right there speaks volumes to me. So no matter what in life or who's bringing you down, even if it's, I swear, even if it's a job to job, relationship, family, whoever it's like you have, I'm my own decision maker and I choose that. Nobody has control of me and what I think or do with my life.
Speaker 2:Right. So, have boundaries, right. Yeah, yes, that's true. No one else does have control of us right. It takes a long time to learn that in life, but hopefully we we can, you know, help somebody else's life out just a little more Right.
Speaker 1:Exactly, yeah, so they don't have that issue. Yeah, yep, definitely so. Um, tell me about the book and you are not alone.
Speaker 2:I love that title, yeah, and the reason why I named it this way this is the book it's called. You are not. It's your guide for when divorce is on your doorstep. The reason why I chose that name is because, you know, listening to people talk about divorce, right? They feel so alone, but I wanted to give them you know, the book is all about empathy, compassion, dealing with the emotional aspects of divorce as well as the financial piece of it, so I wanted it to be something that they could hold on to and feel like there was somebody there that was supporting them the whole way. Um, that they're not alone, right? Um, and there's a lot of support out there for them. Um, because I remember how alone I felt in my divorce.
Speaker 2:You feel like you're the only one going through that, but there's a lot of us. I know that doesn't make it feel any better, but we're here to support you. My book the intention was to be very compassionate but also give you some practical advice. Right, that wasn't? Didn't feel like I was preaching to you or was boring. I have templates in there. I have checklists for you that you can utilize and download and and help you get through the process and be in your best shape for going through divorce.
Speaker 1:That is amazing Now to my listeners. This is already on the website, in the storefront, so check it out. And definitely you can go buy her book right away too. So I just love that and I was so like even the cover of your book. I was looking at the picture. I was like, is that a garden? But you said doorstep.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I say doorstep because the picture I was hoping it like depicts like you're going through like a door and it's going to be brighter on the other side, right.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:There's hope for that, that um, and it is brighter. I um, you know, like I said, I've been through two and it is brighter. On the other side, I I look at my last divorce, even though it was so hard as it was a gift to me, right, I never would have been able to do some of the things that I do now, because I have more strength than I ever thought I ever would. But you know, there is hope. Keep hope alive, right? I love that. Yes.
Speaker 1:There definitely is hope and a lot of people like when you get the bad news or whatever is happening, you do feel like there isn't at the time. But you know, with each day like it changes. And I really feel like it has to do with our body resting and falling asleep, because when day one comes, I mean you may feel a little bit, but it's most of. It is kind of I kind of picture it like well, how do I put this Almost like God working to clear that memory, or it kind of like the movie inside out? They're all working inside of us. Hey, we got to get rid of this. Let's put it in her nothing box in the back. But I mean, I you know it gets better. That is my advice. Will you still think about everything, of course, because that was a big factor in your life.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you're grieving right. So you have to allow yourself to go through that grieving process. You're either grieving like missing that person, or maybe you're grieving this life that you, you know, had dreamed about and looking forward to in the future. But you're grieving right and eventually you just keep putting one foot down. You're going to get there right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you definitely will.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Now I'm going to ask you for our listeners who want to get in contact with you, if they wanted to schedule a meeting with you and maybe they're out of state. Do you do Zoom calls and stuff like?
Speaker 2:that yes.
Speaker 1:I.
Speaker 2:I offer a 30 minute um complimentary consultation, um consultation that we could just chat and maybe I could give you some information, but I do, I offer.
Speaker 1:That is wonderful. That is so wonderful. I'm glad to hear that. Oh, the other question I like to ask. Going back to the book really quick Is it in audio also?
Speaker 2:I am working on that right now. I'm working on that right now.
Speaker 1:I have somebody read it. Yeah, either you're a reader or you just like listening to it. And you know what was it with my job? I got a car play that is coming in the mail pretty soon and I'm so excited about it. But it has the audio books and I was like I just love listening to audio books. I was just like that's going to be good for my drives, but that is cool. So the whole concept of going through writing the book, you had that feeling I guess it has to out and people need to read this. You know, I know that energy because I just got done my book and now I'm at the place of I don't have a publisher, I don't, I don't even know the next step. So, um, but yeah, so I know the energy it takes to get that done, but the feeling of when it's done, you're like this is the best feeling. It's like Christmas to me. Now what to do next?
Speaker 2:Right, right, exactly. It does feel great yeah.
Speaker 1:So what are your goals for 2025, going into 26?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so you can hear me okay, right, yeah, okay, I have an audio issue with my head. Um, yeah, I am hoping to get um a. You know those that are very similar to um what we. You know what the book is about, but some things that you use that would be um helpful, and some group group programs as well. So that's my 2025 goals that is amazing.
Speaker 1:That is so good. I'm glad to hear that now. Have you ever thought about doing a podcast on your own?
Speaker 1:yeah, maybe someday yeah gotcha gotcha next step you see, yeah, I tell people, you know, I used to tell everybody last year I want to write a book, but I'm not going to do it. I my my podcast here is my book and I, you know. And then you know, interviewing so many authors and stuff, I was like you know what I can have the best of both worlds. What am I thinking, you know? And then you know, interviewing so many authors and stuff, I was like you know what I can have the best of both worlds. What am I thinking, you know, yeah, let's do it. So, yeah, but definitely I love it. Well, I just want I'm sorry, I wanted to ask did we cover everything? I know you do so much. I'm going to make sure we have everything covered, you do so much.
Speaker 2:I'm going to make sure we have everything covered. Oh, you're so sweet. Yeah, I think we have. You know. Just, I think it's important to get your finances together and if you need any help with that, let me know.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, and guys, yeah, like Shel, this has been amazing. Like you, your background. I love everything from your father sitting you down, teaching and putting it for the better, better, and not being so like just a accountant person, like you're really taking people's hearts and helping mend them, and that's what hope is about. So that is wonderful. I'm so glad I met you.
Speaker 2:That comes across because I try to have that compassion and I care about people's outcomes.
Speaker 1:So yeah, I would definitely say you do. I can see it. You just have this glow when you talk about it and everything. So, yeah, thank you for coming on the show and everything. So so, guys, wherever you find your podcasts, you'll be able to find Keep Hope Alive. Also, visit our website at wwwkeephopelivepodcastcom. To the right of it there is a leave a message button that you can leave a message for Chelle or myself and we will get those answered right away. I promise I'm going to send it to her and be like hey, quick podcast. But definitely check out all her information. Go check out the book on our storefront. If you would like to be a guest on our show, there is a guest intake form that you can sign out to. Or maybe it's a suggestion of a podcast you want to hear. I'd be more than happy to get those, read those and look over it and you know, who knows, maybe I can manifest against Michael Bublé, like we talked about.
Speaker 2:There we go yeah.
Speaker 1:Goals for 25 into 26.
Speaker 2:I love it.
Speaker 1:I mean I do. I was surprised I got Neil Young's brother, bob Young.
Speaker 1:He's on the show too, so it can happen it can happen yeah definitely maybe somebody's listening to them don't be like, I know him, he's a friend of mine. You know. My promise is everybody gets treated just like all my other guests and it's a lot of fun. So, and that's what life is about we have to enjoy it, no matter what we go through. So all right, so until our next show, guys. I wish you a great week and love and light. Bye, guys.
