Raymond's life began with a dad who beat him up and a life that beat him down. He learned from an early age to fend for himself, began dealing drugs at age 11 and landed in prison at age 19. Raymond spent his early adult life traveling the country and visiting every state in the continental U.S. by manipulating money and service out of strangers. At age 36 he met a woman that changed his life and caused him to change his ways. They had a wonderful son named Sebastian, who Raymond loved dearly and to whom he became the kind of loving Dad that he never knew himself. Then when Sebastian was 12 years old a drunk driver hit him and his mom and took both of their lives. Raymond was crushed and began to face a continuing number of further hardships. Raymond went back to Alcohol, becoming destitute and ended up homeless. But God. God created Raymond with some very special qualities, resilience like none other, compassion for others, and a humility to learn lessons even in the face of harsh and devastating circumstances. Raymond had a grandmother whose voice and influence had far reaching power, and Raymond had a God who he would learn that loved him more than he ever knew. This is a story you don't want to miss.
Raymond's life began with a dad who beat him up and a life that beat him down. He learned from an early age to fend for himself, began dealing drugs at age 11 and landed in prison at age 19. Raymond spent his early adult life traveling the country and visiting every state in the continental U.S. by manipulating money and service out of strangers. At age 36 he met a woman that changed his life and caused him to change his ways. They had a wonderful son named Sebastian, who Raymond loved dearly and to whom he became the kind of loving Dad that he never knew himself. Then when Sebastian was 12 years old a drunk driver hit him and his mom and took both of their lives. Raymond was crushed and began to face a continuing number of further hardships. Raymond went back to Alcohol, becoming destitute and ended up homeless. But God. God created Raymond with some very special qualities, resilience like none other, compassion for others, and a humility to learn lessons even in the face of harsh and devastating circumstances. Raymond had a grandmother whose voice and influence had far reaching power, and Raymond had a God who he would learn that loved him more than he ever knew. This is a story you don't want to miss.
And, I left that morning. Went back to where I was sleeping at in the woods, right down the street from the Freedom House, and Drank a beer that morning. Went, ate breakfast, came back down after breakfast and had bought two more beers. And a bag of tobacco. And I was sitting in the woods and looking at all the trash around me. And I said, God, what am I doing? I stepped, I just stood up off the log that I was sitting on and walked back up to the safe house. I was there 45 minutes. And Miss Amy, I believe her name is, came down to the dining room at the safe house and said, Mr. Ness, you're going to the Freedom House. Within 45 minutes of coming back in the building. I'm glad you guys are here. When I found safe house last year, I was a little worried. I was a little worried at first, but the reality was is you could see God everywhere. Even if it was just a simple person sitting there at the safe house on one of the benches, there was a look or smile or something going on that was positive.
Phil Shuler:HellO, and welcome to Renew, Restore, Rejoice, the Safe House Ministries podcast, where we share stories of the power of God to change lives through Safe House Ministries. Safe House Ministries is based out of Columbus, Georgia, and we are a ministry that exists to love and serve people who have been affected by addiction, homelessness, and incarceration. I'm your host, Phil Shuler, the Director of Development for Safe House Ministries here in Columbus, Georgia. Safe House serves over 1, 100 people each month as they transition back into our community. Safe House provides an abundance of services including 213 beds for homeless individuals and families, case management for obtaining job skills and long term employment. Over 300 hot meals every day, free clothing, and so much more. One of the most incredible services that Safe House provides is our free 9 12 month intensive outpatient substance abuse program, which is state licensed, CARF accredited, and has no wait list. Almost 100 percent of individuals staying in our shelters who follow our three phase program become fully employed within a few months. And 68 percent of individuals who stay at least one night with us End up finding work and moving into their own home. Thank you for being with us today and listening to our podcast. We hope you enjoy this week's episode.
Good morning. This morning on the podcast, I am sitting here with Raymond and as many of the people that come onto the podcast, Raymond was someone that one of my colleagues at safe house said, Hey, you really should get Raymond on the podcast. He has a great story to tell and just a great testimony of what God's done in his life. And so I reached out and Raymond said he'd love to be on the podcast. And so I'm very glad Raymond, thank you for being here. Thank you for having me. Raymond, I usually start out asking a question, and I just would love to know if there was one word that you could use to describe yourself. What might that word be? Genuine. Genuine. That's great. What do you mean when you say genuine? I'm a blessing to be alive right now. I was raised in a dysfunctional family, of course. My dad was a biker. My mother, I never met until I was 36 years old. I was born in San Fernando, California, and my dad brought me from California on the back of a motorcycle to Ohio as an infant. Wow. And just say he didn't miss a bar on the way. My grandparents and aunts and uncles helped raise me, which was pretty traumatic because my dad wasn't there all the time. My grandma passed when I was seven, unfortunately, but she instilled a lot of values and morals in me. I didn't know what they were at first when I was a child. It took me a long time to learn, to understand that people are important. fOr the most part, my childhood was extremely rocky up until I was 16 years old, it It was just a rough thing for me. Wow. So your dad passed when you were seven, you said? No, my grandmother did. Your grandma. And she was the one that was really raising you and Right. Trying to teach you. Okay. Wow. So then your dad was gone a lot. Did you raise yourself as, I pretty much raised myself as a child, as adolescent, a young child. Learned how to cook for myself, learned how to. Wash clothes for myself, always kept a house or an apartment or wherever we were living, clean. Hard things, he'd be gone on benders for two or three weeks at a time and he'd come home mad and use me for his punching bag and it was really rough. I grew up in bars a lot so it wasn't hard for me to learn real fast how to fend for myself. Yeah. Everything was hand me downs, or nothing was ever new, never learned how to play catch, or go fishing with my dad, and those were things that I helped instill in my son. Yeah. I taught my son those things, those important values of life, being able to be around all the time and care and show him love that, people are there for him. Yeah, you wanted to be a different kind of dad. That's good. So when you, as you started to become a teenager and even a man on your own what happened then? At a young age, I learned drugs and money and thinking having everything was important. Cars and houses and, different little things, like clothes and furniture, whatever. And I started selling drugs at a very young age. Most would be surprised, but I started at 11 years old selling crack cocaine off my front porch. Wow. How did you get, how did you get into that? It was in a neighborhood I lived in. The corner store, the man that owned it, sold us the drugs and we'd flip the profit and go back and buy more and keep doing it. Wow. At 11 years old? At 11, yes. Man. Were you a part of a gang or just doing that on your own? No, I did it on my own. Me and my little stepsister and when my dad finally had a relationship, there was random women but I had a stepsister. We hung out a little bit and grew up together and we were both doing the same thing. Wow. hoW did that progress? tHe drug sales turned into a drug addiction and then trouble followed and I ended up in prison in Colorado at 18. Wow, so from 11 to 18, it just, you just got worse selling than you started using, became addicted, and you said you ended up in prison at 18? 19, I ended up getting in trouble in Fort Collins, Colorado, stealing a car, robbery, and went on a high speed chase down into New Mexico, and got in all kinds of trouble for that one, but God was there. Wow. He looked out for me. He was like, An angel on my shoulder that never let me get hurt. Too bad. Wow. So you, when you at a 19 then did, they incarcerate you for a period of time? I was incarcerated for two and a half years in Colorado State penitentiary. And that was probably the scariest experience of my life, even though I grew up with a biker drunk drug addict all the time and prison turned my life around. Wow. So it was really scary there. Yeah. Oh yeah, for a little guy like me, yeah. Oh man wow. So after two and a half years there what happened? I came out, battled homelessness for a year tried to work and slept on every couch or in every set of woods I could tried to fend for myself, thinking I knew everything. I had this mentality of, I, I don't have to do this or I don't have to do that and self righteousness. Thinking that I was the most powerful person in the world because I went to prison. When really it's not about being powerful. Yeah. It took me a long time to learn that. Wow. being in prison and going through that made you feel like you could essentially handle anything. Yeah, take over the world. Yeah. Yep. Wow. Wow. So after a year of homelessness and then did you get your footing and did you get a direction after that? I got a footing, but again, lost it. I battled alcoholism and drug addiction up until I was almost 36 years old. And when I turned 36, I met my wife down here in Columbus. So how did you go from Colorado, getting out of prison, How did you get down this way? I traveled America for a lot of years. When I was between my early teens all the way through. I've been in every state in the United States except for Hawaii. Learned a lot. Because of my father. Yeah. Paying attention to what he did taught me what I could do. Yeah like bad things like getting a lot of bad things. Yes. I got in a lot of trouble in my life, but What he taught me was If you're afraid of being somewhere if you don't want to be somewhere He says you can go anywhere in the world that you want to but when you get there you're there So whatever problems you drag with you are gonna be there with you so I learned from that just that yeah, I know he was being rude when he said it, But when he told me that, it took me about 10 years to realize what he had said to me. And ultimately, it's about getting my life together. Him wanting me to get my life together and not be like him. It's in the idea of, you can't run from your problems. Correct. That you have to actually face and deal with them. That's deep wisdom. Yes. Wow. As ornery as he was, it was deep. That's such a good lesson though, because I think sometimes we reject hearing instruction and hearing wisdom because of the way it's delivered to us. And often it's delivered in the wrong way. People have the wrong spirit, or they say it in a judgmental way, but the truth is the truth. Yeah. And it's there, even if it's delivered in an ornery way. We can still receive it and better ourselves by just listening to it. Exactly. It's all about opening your ears and hearing it. Yeah. If you can just hear your heart and hear where it's coming from, then it might do some good. So what were you doing traveling? Like how did you, were you hitchhiking or were you driving a truck or how did you? Controlled manipulation. Okay. I was at a very early age growing up in bars with my dad. It was not hard for me to walk up and quarter somebody to death to play a video game or a jukebox or whatever, buy sodas and drinks and food. And I learned how to pretty much talk people out of their pocket. Wow. That is what I learned the most. What I do not advocate doing that, but what would you say was the key to being successful at that? Getting them to understand you or hear you. Yeah? Yeah. If they could, if their emotional strings could be tugged just the tiniest bit, that was the first hook that you had to sink, but it was disingenuous in the way that you were doing it. Correct. Trying to be manipulative. Wow. Which was a thing that I broke at the age of 36. Wow. Okay. So you just did whatever, traveled, got people to, transport you, maybe a place to stay or just whatever you needed. Were you, did you work much during those years? I did. I worked for a carnival in Mississippi, Purvis Mississippi Delta shows. I worked with them for five years, moving rides and setting up rides. And I got in a movie one. I got into one movie. Really? Yes. What's the name of the movie? Joe Dirt. Okay. Was it a, a big time movie? Yeah, it was a big time movie. It was a comedy. Wow. I only played a part in it, just because I was a carnival worker. And I was operating a ride. I'm not in there visually, but I'm in the background operating a ride. Nice. Yeah. Oh, that's fun. Wow. Various jobs that you were there for a while, a few years working at the carnival then just bouncing around different states. Yes. Still addicted to drugs at this point, or still selling drugs, or? Not, no, I quit selling drugs when I got in trouble in Colorado. I didn't think it was a positive thing to do anymore in my life, that I was afraid I was going to end up getting caught, which made me want to stop selling. Yeah. So I started doing more than I was selling. And my biggest drug was crystal meth. To go constantly. Because I love moving, I love working. And that kept me going. But overdose on that 25 years ago, pumped the brakes on that drug. Wow, that caused you to wake up and quit using that? Oh yeah, when I woke up in a hospital and they told me what I had done, it made me quit. So You are, you have a good quality it seems and it sounds like of when you face a disastrous consequence you tend to learn from it. That's what I'm hearing that not all people have that and in my life I I have faced some crazy things but I love to read and I love to read because I want to learn so that I can try to maybe avoid having to go through the school of hard knocks. But if you learn, that's a good thing. It sounds like you've faced some very hard knocks, but you've learned from a lot of those. I've forced myself to learn. Is that just a quality that the Lord gave you and how he created you just to, that's good, man. I believe everybody can learn from the simplest things in the world. If you're open to learn. Yeah. And even when you're not open to learn, I still believe you learn something along the way that's either going to benefit your life or help somebody else's. That's good. Wow. So bouncing around a lot of crazy situations. You got, so you're, you got rid of the drugs after you OD'd and had that near death experience, I would guess. Yes. So then, but you were still homeless, manipulating people, and then you said until you were about 36 years old? Yep. And I went to prison in West Virginia. For that, what was that for? That was for car theft, robbery. Okay. I ran 10 state police off the highway of Barnardtown, West Virginia. Ten state police off the highway? Yes, sir. You sound like some kind of driver. I was, a friend of mine had asked me that I met at a homeless shelter in West Virginia. How to get him home. He wanted my help getting him home and he was from Waynesburg, Pennsylvania. And I was in Morgantown, West Virginia at the time. So I walked up to a car lot, told him I had 10, 000 in my backpack and I wanted to test drive a vehicle. Took five different vehicles on a test drive without them ever asking me for identification or a driver's license. Ended up stealing the truck with the salesman in it and went on a high speed chase into Waynesburg, Pennsylvania. Wow. That sounds serious. It was extremely serious. At first I had kidnapping charges. I was looking at a life sentence. I ended up doing a 12 flat, which four years to the board, I paroled, went back home to Ohio and God gave me a second chance. Third or fourth chance I should say by then. Wow. Ohio, that's where you started and that's that's where always you've over the years have thought of as home. As home, yes. Okay. So after getting out for that four years. Did you start waking up then, or did you still get back into it? I woke up. I met my wife down here in Columbus, Georgia. I was down here doing a job. Okay, so you were in Ohio after you got out. How'd you get down here to Columbus? I started a painting business, a custom painting business. And I was asked to come down and paint a house down here in Columbus. Wow! Was that through the internet? They just saw you through the internet? They saw my work and wanted me to come down. Okay. So you can't, did you, at that point, was it just a trip to come down and then go back or were you planning on just coming and staying? It was a trip to come down. I wanted a break from Ohio. Yeah. I painted the house and then I ended up getting a job with the carnival here when it was down off victory, down there for victory. I worked with that show and that's how I met my wife. That's how God brought me my wife. What was that story? A year ago. Just over a year ago now. My son and wife were killed by a drunk driver. Oh. In Ohio. Oh. Um, you had been married over the years. Yeah. Oh man. Yeah. How old was your son? Twelve. Man. But an awesome kid. Awesome wife. I came down last year to spread their ashes, down here where we were married, off to Riverwalk. Wow, so this is the wife that you met when you came on that trip down here. Then you guys moved back to Ohio. We moved to Ohio. She worked with Progressive Auto Sales. And you had a son. And that was a year ago, that. Just over a year now, yeah. I can't imagine how hard that was. It was tough. Did that kind of send you into a tailspin a little bit? After they passed I come down here and spread their ashes. Met with her mom here in Columbus and Had a little ceremony, yeah. And her mother told me, she said Alright, take care. She was supposed to help me get back home. Oh. Then I found safe house ministries. So you were stuck. You, I was stuck here. You didn't have a way of getting back to Ohio. No, not a bit. Didn't have enough money to get there to pay for a bus ticket or a flight. Wow. So I found safe house ministries on Hamilton road and started trying to work, find little odd jobs to save money so I can go home. Yeah. And a lady I met up there, which isn't there anymore. Helped me get my bus ticket home. And I made it home last year before Thanksgiving. Back to Ohio? Back to Ohio. To find a bank coming in and locking my house up. Oh. I lost my house, my business, everything. It was snatched away from me. What'd you do, I'm sure you didn't know what to do at that point. I got mad. At first. I'd been mad there for a little while ever since the accident. And pretty much wandered around and drank and slept in the woods in the wintertime in Ohio. It was pretty cold. Oh, yeah. And did what I could to just survive with my tobacco and my alcohol for that year. Then the anniversary of them came up, so I came back down here. I bought a bus ticket, came back down. October 19th, I got here. October 17th, but I got to Freedom House on October 19th. Two or three months ago, or October was, okay. Yeah, two or three months ago. And I came down, I seen Pastor Paul. And I remembered him from last year, and a couple other people, and Asked him, how do I get into Freedom House? And, I left that morning. Went back to where I was sleeping at in the woods, right down the street from the Freedom House, and Drank a beer that morning. Went, ate breakfast, came back down after breakfast and had bought two more beers. And a bag of tobacco. And I was sitting in the woods and looking at all the trash around me. And I said, God, what am I doing? I stepped, I just stood up off the log that I was sitting on and walked back up to the safe house. I was there 45 minutes. And Miss Amy, I believe her name is, came down to the dining room at the safe house and said, Mr. Ness, you're going to the Freedom House. Within 45 minutes of coming back in the building. Was this a few days later, or was this the next day, or? It was that day. Wow. It was that day, October 19th. I'll never forget that day. Wow. Wow. And the freedom house is the men's shelter for safe house, correct? So October 19th you got into the freedom house with safe house ministries. What's happened from there? A lot of good things have happened. Blessings come out every day. Even if it's just talking with people God's restored my heart. Showed me that there's more I can love in the world other than just my wife and my son. Yeah. He put me in the kitchen. I love to cook. Yeah? I love to cook. I get to talk with guys, kind of be a father figure, maybe you can say. Cause I get a lot of younger guys will come up and knock on my door and Hey, Ray, what are you doing? Not much, brother. How's your day? It's it's what God wants me to do, it seems yeah, just being a positive Almost like a mentor. Yeah, being a positive influence in the lives of others. That's good. So you're working in the kitchen at the Freedom House. Yes, sir. Volunteering there every day. That's awesome. Gentleman asked me if I wanted to be in there today and I was hurt by it, but, because I'm in there all the time as it is. Yeah. But I told him I'd help if it came down to it, just need people to step up and help. Yeah, and Just like safe house does yeah, I'm just like you do it offers us opportunities to straighten our lives back out and get back on our feet and That's a blessing to me That's awesome. I love what the Lord's doing in your life it will really be neat to see Just, over the coming years, how the Lord wants to use you to be a positive influence on the lives of others. Yes, sir. Do you have any thoughts about where the Lord might be leading you? I've done a lot of thinking about that in the past year. But, since I've been here, I would love to help solve homelessness if I could. It's a big task. Love can do it. You're right. Yeah. And the Lord can do it. That's right. Yeah. That's so true. Have you gone through some of the goodwill classes? Yep. I completed all the goodwill and my resume and everything and I've been adamant about getting employment with the Freedom House or Safe House, either or. So you want to work for the ministry? Yes, I do. Because you want to solve homelessness and help people. Absolutely. I think that's great and that's, that is not an uncommon thing that I've heard of people that have gone through darkness and difficulty and when the Lord has brought them out, they want to give back. I think that's crucial. That's, that is a common denominator among those who are victorious, is giving back. I think. Jesus is the greatest example of that. Giving everything, giving his life and just, yeah. Wow. I think we suffer to, to know what it feels like to be loved. Jesus loved us. Yeah. And for us to show that we can love everybody, it's not wrong to love people. No, it's what we're supposed to do, right? So I've heard you talk about God. Being there and leading you and being a part of your life over the years how did you come to have a personal relationship with God or with Jesus? My grandmother. Yeah? Yeah, my grandmother. She sounds like she was a wonderful lady. She was an awesome lady. She was an awesome lady. She took me to church, Pentecostal church when I was a kid. Yeah? Yeah. And they'd always, we called them holy rollers when we were younger. But she'd get in there speaking in tongues and rolling around on the floor and kind of scared me at first because I wasn't sure what it was. You were young. Extremely. Yeah. And she just kept saying, don't give up on yourself. Don't ever give up on yourself. Just because other people give up on you doesn't mean you have to because God's not going to either. So that stuck with me. So she brought you to church all the way till she passed. Yes. Yeah. Did you, so when you passed when you were seven. Yes sir. Did you go to church over the years on your own? I did and then I ended up working too much or finding an excuse not to go to church and oh I'm taking a day off or this that or the other. But my son and my wife got me going again. Yeah. And their love that they had was just amazing because They wanted me to love like they do. Like they did. And one brief little thing, my son came home from school one day and he said He said, Dad, why are people so mean? I said, because you're so dang nice. And he, his spirit about him, he just always wanted to be nice to people. And that part I'll never forget. God blessed me with that. I'll never forget that. Wow, what was his name? Sebastian Michael. Wow, that's a good name. Two good names. Yes, sir. Are those family names? No. Okay. Me and my wife picked them. Yeah? Yeah. Wow. Wow. He was he reminded me of a person I wanted to be when I was little. Yeah. And with the positive side of life. Not with all the negatives. Yeah, it was like he they took my DNA and just gave it all to him and said here You're an older soul Hopefully I did enough suffering for everybody You have a really neat story It's a really hard story You've been through a lot But the Lord has had a plan and a purpose The whole time he still has a plan and a purpose. Yes, sir He does. Are you going to church here anywhere in Columbus? I was. I'm still looking for a home church here in Columbus. I've been to a couple. I don't really prefer the, where they pass judgment against people, but, cause it says not to. And I choose not to in life. I do my best not to anyway. But I'm working on getting a home church. Yeah. Just visiting a few places. Yes. It's just. Seeing where God wants me. Yeah. Yeah.
Phil Shuler:We look forward to being with you again next week as we share another testimony about the power and the goodness of God to change lives through Safe House Ministries. if you are someone listening to this podcast that loves to hear these stories of the great things that God is doing in changing people's lives for the better, and if you would like to be a part of that work, please reach out to us You can reach us at 2101 Hamilton Road, Columbus, Georgia, 31,904. You can call us at seven oh six three two two. 3 7, 7 3, or you can email us at info@safehouse-ministries.com.