50th Episode Celebration

In this episode, we look back on 50 episodes of RAISING DISABLED and reflect on our favorite question that we always ask caregivers, "What is the best thing to come out raising your disabled child?"  We share some of our favorite answers from our past episodes and then we talk about what our answer is to this question.

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Rhandyl: [00:00:00] Hey y'all. Welcome back to Raising Disabled. Today's a big episode and we'll get into it more, but we just wanted to. Catch you guys up on things that we've been doing. So it's just been life recently.

Mm-hmm. Not a lot going on. The weather's changing here, so all the springtime things it's nicer outside, so we're getting to do more walks and yard work and all this, that fun stuff. Remi actually went on a field trip a few weeks ago and I. Was able to take off work and go they went to a farming museum here. It's like a cotton farming museum. 'cause cotton in our area is, that's like the main bulk of the farming industry here. Yeah. And they have really cool exhibits. I did not realize, I mean, I've lived here for. Almost 20 years and I have never been to this. And they've added so many things to it, but it's really cool.

They had a tractor [00:01:00] hayride situation. Oh, that's where, where they would take you to different Yeah, definitely not handicap accessible. That part of it wasn't No um, no. But the main area where they had all the exhibits. It's huge and it was very handicap accessible and so That's good. That was, yeah, it was a lot of fun.

Remi was overstimulated at first when she got there. She, it was just, out of her school routine. She's like on the school bus, but she's, where am i? Where are we going? Why are we not going home or to school? What's going on? Yeah, I met her when she was getting off the bus and I could tell she was like, I don't know what's going on. And then she sees me and she smiles, but she's still like, I don't know what's going on. I don't know where we are. She's like, why are you here? I know it took about 10, 15 minutes and then she really started to enjoy it and

they had this like cotton stripper simulator. And so we got in that and you feel like you're. It moves and [00:02:00] it the screen. Yeah. And everything looks like you're stripping cotton. And it was fun. Fun. That's cool. She was just looking all around and so it was fun. It made me really dizzy. Like I got this really weird, I don't know if it was, I was like, okay, I'm gonna puke. I'm gonna, yeah, I'm gonna get outta here. But she enjoyed it. And then um, that's funny.

It was a really cool exhibit. They had the history of cotton farming and all the old equipment, and it was just neat. I came from a farming background. Mm-hmm. Not necessarily cotton, but just seeing all the.

Original equipment to the crazy industry that it is now. It's pretty wild. But so she, were you in FFA like me? No, you weren't actually, surprisingly. That's a, that's funny. My, my dad was never a, pro FFA guy, and I don't know why, because

Deonna: I feel like you're more redneck than me, but I was an FFA. This doesn't make sense. I did it and it was, oh yeah. I [00:03:00] judged all the things like crops. All that. Yeah. Yeah. 

Rhandyl: That's cool. , My husband did. They were big in showing, they did lots of showing, oh, 

Deonna: I'm gonna have to talk to him about that next time I see him. They went to 

Rhandyl: Houston every year and all the things they Oh my gosh. Did of that. Yeah. That's so funny. I remember my, I had friends that did it forever, from elementary through high school, and I had asked my dad I wanted to do a steer or something. Oh. And he was just. He was so against it. He was like, it's just a waste. It was too much money and he just didn't see. It's expensive. Yeah. Yeah. It's not like I didn't take care of. Animals and work cattle. Yeah. And do all the things but different. 

Deonna: You did the real side of it, not the like fake showing side of it. Like us. Yeah. Yeah. That's funny.

Rhandyl: So it was just, yeah. But , that was the highlight of the last few weeks. But what about you guys? What have y'all been up to? Yeah, Allie. 

Deonna: Allie had a field trip too, but we, oh, she just stayed home for it because, they were going to a jungle gym, [00:04:00] that was their field trip. And so we're kind of like, okay, she can't do that, so we're not gonna pay money for her to go watch her friends play. And so she just stayed home and we went and saw a movie and, lived our best life. But , the big thing we did the past week is we had told our son he turned 13 this year, which is nuts.

I can't believe I'm the mom of a teenager, but I feel like it in some ways like, but anyways, . We had had this idea to, instead of buying him presents to take him to Dallas, which is five hours away from Lubbock and just go shopping and take him to Six Flags, which is an amusement park that's pretty big there.

Yeah. And just hang out. My husband had to do this helicopter school where they. It freaked me out. I watched him doing this. Like they pretend they're crashing that's a simple way of explaining it. Like they do these fake crash simulations where they go up into the air and [00:05:00] they kill the, engine essentially. Oh wow. And then you have to land without killing yourself. And they teach you how to do it. Like he knows how to do it and everything, but you have to go get practiced up on it every year. My husband had to go do that, so me and my son were like, we're gonna go with him and go play when he's working and then on Saturday maybe we can go to Six Flags.

So that ended up happening. It was cool. We basically, I. Got there and dropped him off, and then me and my son went and bought new shoes. My son is really into shoes, which I shoe geek. There's a lot of boys like this. It's an expensive little hobby, but he spends all the money he ever gets on shoes. I'm like, whatever. I would've never done that. I was like a $5 old Navy. Flip flop girl, whatever. But we went and did that.

And then he, googled an indoor waterpark and there's this really cool waterpark in Dallas called Epic Waters. [00:06:00] And it is just this massive building. And it has the surfing simulation thing in it. Yeah. And it has a lazy river and a little kid area. And then it has, tons of slides and just all kinds of fun stuff. So me and him went there and just swam for hours, and stuff. Oh, how fun. And so then at night my husband's training was, down by the Fort Worth, stockyards, yeah. And so we went down there. , I had never been down there before. And so I take Cole on a Friday night, oh boy. Down to the Fort Worth stockyards, which I thought it was just like. Restaurants, but it's actually more of like bar seat, you know, like sixth Street, Austin, like Vegas strip kind of vibe. More than I realized. Yeah.

So it was funny, like only in Texas, like there was like a bar and then a restaurant, and then like a boots shop and then a bar, and then, you know. yep. But the. The PBR finals were going on down there [00:07:00] while we were there. And so we just was got dinner and that was Oh, it was crazy. Yeah. My son got to witness some fun things, but we we just had fun, like people watching. It was entertaining and stuff. Yeah.

But then we went and watched my husband do some of those. Simulations, which was really freaky. It just basically looked like he was crashing and we would just watch him go down really fast and then he would pop right back up and then go back down. We were like, oh my gosh, I hope he knows what he is doing. But and then the next day we went to Six Flags, so that was fun. Cole is starting to like. All the big rides and, oh, yeah, everything. So we rode and rode rides and we didn't dress right either. Like we were dressed for it to be cooler and it was hot. So 

Rhandyl: every, it doesn't matter what time of year I've ever been to Six Flags, it's always so hot, always hot. 

Deonna: But my son hadn't , done the Titan, which is like their biggest rollercoaster and I hadn't ridden it in [00:08:00] 20 years. And so we went and did that one a few times and he loved it. But it is a pretty scary rollercoaster. Like it was

Rhandyl: I black out every time I'm on, I ride that one. 

Deonna: That one is nuts. Like we. 

Rhandyl: Yeah, the GForce on that one curve. Like it, yeah. I blackout for about a good 10 seconds every time 

Deonna: I told my husband, is this what like, fighter pilots feel like? Like my face felt like it was like shaking. But Cole was like, we got up there and Cole's like, I don't know about this. And I was like, you're doing it now, dude. Like we've waited while this it. Yeah, but I have never ridden a Texas giant, which is like the big wooden coaster. And so that was fun. 'cause I had never done that one before. But I think they revamp it. A little nervous. Yeah. Like you're seeing the wood shake a lot and I'm like, ugh, I'm gonna be on that in a second, but, okay.

But no, it was good because like we've talked about on here many times. The sibling of a disabled kid, can get the Yeah. Raw end of the deal and just [00:09:00] it's hard to pay the same amount of attention to them. There's no way it'll ever add up, yeah, the amount of time. I think it made him feel good that he just got to go do his own thing with us and. Get all the attention. And I let him sit in the front seat the whole way there and back. He was living his best life. Nice. So now he thinks he gets to do that every trip and I'm like no, I'll let you do that this once.

But that's what we've been up to. It was fun. But we're, we're back now and getting sick from being at a water park and an amusement park and yeah. Touching everything everyone else touched. So that's how it goes. Always.

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Rhandyl: so we're just gonna transition into the episode that we are so excited to share with you guys. We are celebrating over two years of this podcast, and this episode is our 50th episode, which is wild. Yeah. And it's just crazy that. We've came this far. We made it past twice. Yeah, exactly. We've had a lot of trial and error learning by mistakes and Yeah. Lots of mistakes. Yeah. Continuing to learn, still making them. Yeah.

But to celebrate our two year anniversary and this 50th episode, we wanted to take you guys back to a few [00:11:00] of our previous episode highlights. We always ask our caregiver guests, what are some of the positive, unexpected moments from raising their disabled children? And I always love the answers that we get. Mm-hmm. I just love this question and the answers that we get.

And so we'll share these now and then Deonna and I will share our thoughts on this. And so our first one is from episode six, and the title is Amber Raising Henry. 

Amber: learning to be resilient and flexible and not having expectations are the same expectations of what life is gonna look like. Yeah. Because, yeah, just because. Just because something is different doesn't make it bad. Yeah. Yeah. And that doesn't mean you're any less than Yeah. And it doesn't make, it doesn't make them less than, it just makes it different. Yeah. And that's something I wish people knew that just because my child looks [00:12:00] differently, just because they, do things differently doesn't mean they're less than. 

Deonna: Okay. Our next comment was from Danielle Raising Baron, and this was episode 10. 

Danielle:  It's just crazy how much joy he's brought. And I truly think that it's made me really focus on the smaller things that no one looks at when you have a typical child. Yeah. Just because it's things that you, at least in my perspective, that I'd really never thought that he would do. Things that he does do, I'm like, Oh my gosh, this is the best day ever because he's doing XYZ, whatever it may be. So that's like the biggest thing is. The amount of joy that this child has brought both Brayden and I, and our whole family, really.  

Rhandyl: The next one was from our good friend Brooke, and it was episode 16, and the title is Brooke Raising Corbin, and this is what she [00:13:00] said. 

Brooke: Through him being nonverbal, the amount of feedback and joy we get from him daily Just his excitement for the little things even waking up in the morning. He's the happiest thing in the world and despite all his trials and Difficulties with everything he is just you will never know you would never look at him And know everything that he has gone through. Just ready to start his day? He is, and he thinks being outside is the best thing in the world. Nice. And he truly takes it in. He'll get his foot and rub it over the grass. Oh my gosh. And just look at me and So cute. Just smile. Aww. He loves it so much. Just the little things. And it really humbles us, cause we're like, Wow We need to find more joy in the little things like he does, and , it's just eye opening. 

Deonna: Our next two comments are from Camie and Tanner Raising Callie, which was episode 27. So they're a married couple, but we're [00:14:00] including both of their comments. 

Kami: We just don't take little things for granted anymore. The fact that Callie does make little bitty milestones that's massive. Oh yeah. That's massive for our family and for her. I think that's just, she's put everything in perspective. For us 

Tanner: I think for me it's faith in humanity my faith in humanity has strengthened just in a world where you know I spend a lot of time on X right now for some stupid reason There's just so much negativity in the world in Having gone through this situation.

 Especially our family, like that, Kami's already talked about, has just stepped up and loved our daughter. And that's really all you can ask for. And, but also there are so many other people in her life that like her nurses or therapists or doctors, who, like you have to have a special place in your heart to want to care for someone like Callie. And. I'm so grateful that there are people like that, [00:15:00] and I didn't know that those people existed before this, and it's really shifted my paradigm about the types of people that are out there that have just such a good heart, and really want to make a difference in the lives of others, and it's awesome. I'm so grateful for them.

Rhandyl: 

Our next caregiver was Jessica Raising Ryan, and this is from episode 33. 

Jessica: . Ryan has taught us so much, right? In the beginning when you get a diagnosis and you start all the early interventions and you know he's going to need, you know, OT PT speech forever and you're trying to get him through his milestones or to the milestones and there's so much focus on that and everything that you're doing for your kid, whether some people have the mindset of Yeah. I want to get them to normal, or, you're like in this fixing problem solving mentality. And then you realize at some point, Oh, I'm actually learning more from my child and this [00:16:00] journey than he or she will ever learn from me or gain from me. And I didn't expect that. And then that turned me on to like how much Luke and Kate also teach me.

I think something else surprising and beautiful is just the shift in perspective, the shift in priorities. I didn't make Luke and Kate check all the boxes in high school to get into some, whatever college. Like I just didn't, I didn't care about that or believe in that. And I knew that they were on their own path. And if they wanted to check boxes and be in clubs and sign up for this and sign up for that, great. But I wasn't going to make them because I didn't really think it mattered. I didn't think it was really important. I didn't want to play the game of, achievement culture. 

Deonna: Okay, so next we have Ruby raising Lexi, and that is episode number 

37. 

Ruby: I think probably the biggest thing is just [00:17:00] seeing once the light bulb switches in her head and she decides she's going to do something, it's going to happen. Like when she was younger, she had zero interest in walking until she decided I need to be walking. And then all of a sudden she could not get enough time in her walker and we had to put the braces on as soon as she woke up. When it came time for. We have, I know you guys have talked about, you've got your challenger league baseball team. We've got a similar baseball team here. And the first couple of games, she was very much I don't know about this. And then once she decided I'm going to hit the ball this week, like she was knocking it off the tee, and so once she puts her mind to something, it's going to happen, like period, end of story, no arguments, it's going to happen. And so I think that's been the most positive thing out of all of this is knowing you. She's going to be okay because once she gets something in her head, it's going to happen. It not concerned about that side of it. 

And then I think the other thing that the bonds that we [00:18:00] have because of everything that we've gone through, it's just very reassuring for me that she knows. No matter what I'm here, no matter what you're going through, no matter what's happening. I'm here. I got your back. We're a team We can do this and you know there's been so many times where we're going to a new office or we're seeing a new doctor or whatever it is and you can see in her face, as long as I'm standing there, she's okay. If I have to step behind the shield for x rays or whatever like her face kind of starts full blown panic, but like how long is the room, and so I think just that she knows. She's got people in her corner and even, outside of me, outside of my parents, like there are so many people that those first couple of years watched her grow up on my blog, if you will. And like the connections that we have through all of our Facebook groups, like she knows she's got people. Those would probably be the biggest things, her determination, the bond that we have and the fact that she knows she's got people. 

Rhandyl: Okay. And our [00:19:00] next guest was Abby, raising Avery, and this is from episode 44. 

Abbey: I think just the joy of finding out that life can be so joyful. And what that means is joy is not found in a situation. If it were found in situations, we would all have a difficult time, right? Because most of our situations are not joyful. So it's really taught me to lean into my faith. And even in a time where you don't want to, right? Because why, right? That's a big question. Why does she have to suffer? But I think too being able to find joy in such difficult times has been the biggest takeaway that I've had from living as a disability mom because you can't wait until good times come, you have to find joy where you are and find things to be thankful for and where you are.

And in turn, it's taught me to be thankful for things that. Maybe parents with only typical children would not be thankful [00:20:00] for. Would they be thankful, for their child making noise? No, but me, I hear Avery babble, and I'm like, oh my god, thank you so much. I get to hear her voice. And it's taught me to be much more thankful for Itty bitty things that I 100 percent would take for granted if not for this life. 

Mm hmm. 

Deonna: Our next one's from Jillian Raising Roman and Stella. And that was our last episode 49. 

Jillian: , I have seen so much good in humanity through this experience. There's just like, you don't realize like how many, it's so easy this day and age too, right? Because the world is on fire to like only see the negative aspects of humanity, but I've seen so much good in people and that's something that I feel so blessed to see and witness. The way our community rallied for us and like to just total strangers that I've never met before. I didn't realize there were such kind [00:21:00] people out there. So that's been definitely a blessing. 

And just what we were talking about before, I feel like when your child is living with a terminal illness or medical complexities, you just get this deep appreciation for the present. And the now that I don't think I would've acquired if my kids didn't have their diagnosis. As bad as that sounds, maybe I would have. Yeah. But I don't know. I feel, I totally agree with that. I feel such a deep appreciation for. Life, like the smallest things, like my my kids now, if they, they don't smile as much now, but when they do, we're like, oh my God, that just made my entire freaking year. Like mm-hmm. seeing them smile one time. Mm-hmm. Or like move their hand up to their mouth. We're like, oh my God. You wouldn't get excited about that kind of stuff 

Rhandyl: if No, you had a, it's the little things, 

Jillian: it's, yeah, it's the little things. And I also would say I've just [00:22:00] met some of the most incredible people and parents and the friendships I've made are just on another level. I think you're able to connect with other. Parents of medically complex kids on a level that is not just surface. Like it goes to genuine. Yeah. Because you have, I just met you guys today and I feel like we, we share the same exact , deep emotions that Yeah. And experiences. And I just feel, I hate what has brought me to some of these people mm-hmm. the circumstances. Sure. But I also wouldn't trade these friendships for the world and Yeah. I've just been able to meet some of the most amazing people. 

Deonna: You become fast friends with people 

Rhandyl: for sure. Yeah. And it definitely helps, at least for me, you've filter out people in your life that, are not as genuine. As I probably would've had, had I not experienced something like this as a caregiver. Yeah. 

Jillian: I feel like it's, there's no room for BS, like it's [00:23:00] Exactly, you find the people that really care and you hold onto those people. Yep. But then on the flip side, you find the people that maybe weren't so great and you don't really need them.

Deonna:  Okay. So we've never really talked about what our answer to this question is, and so that's why you had this good idea to do this. So what are your positive or unexpected moments since raising Remi?

Rhandyl: After listening to all of these comments combined from our listeners, I love how most of the caregivers we talked to over the last two years have similar views and mm-hmm. positive outcomes of raising their disabled children. We are all living very different lives with different diagnosis. Yeah. And cares our views on life. But they're all aligned and it seems like the majority of them. Spoke about finding joy and then also mm-hmm. finding a community [00:24:00] Yeah. Throughout their journeys. And for sure,

for me that was something that was really unexpected was how my circle is so much smaller now. Yeah. Before, yeah. Before having Remi, I was a very social person. I was never a homebody. I was always searching for something to do, people to hang out with. Obviously kids in general slow people down from their social life, of course. But for me, my favorite days now are the ones that I never leave the house. And that we're all home and hanging out.

So like one of the hardest things in the beginning of the journey was having private duty nurses in our home all the time. Yeah. But, and so that was. I know it sounds like I'm starting out on a negative, but after getting,

Deonna: well, at first it was a negative to you.

Rhandyl: Yeah, for sure. And it was an, it was definitely something unexpected. , It was something just so odd. Most people never think they're gonna have someone in their home 24 7. 

Deonna: Oh yeah. [00:25:00] It was a huge invasion of privacy. Yeah. Like initially, it's how it. 

Rhandyl: After years and of finding nurses that fit, and surprisingly they've been the biggest help. Mm-hmm. They're all family and they're Remi's biggest fans, and I just don't know what I would do without them. And so now looking back, I think about the initial few years of private duty nursing to what I have now. Oh my gosh. It's shocking how positive and unexpected it is. I can understand how some people try it and they're like, no way. We're not doing this anymore. I totally but for me, that's definitely been a huge positive for not only me, but for Remi., There's so many things that she wouldn't be able to do if she didn't have them, and oh, for sure. 

Yeah. Probably the [00:26:00] biggest one I would say is something positive and also unexpected was. My faith like I've always been a Christian. I was raised in a Christian household, always had a relationship with the Lord, but after Remi was born and having so many like traumatic experiences and even still all the unknown and ups and downs roller coasters that we. All know and understand in this life.

Yeah. My faith was tested so much, but I felt like Jesus always showed up for me in the times where I felt the most hopeless. So when I was just down, couldn't move, just so weak. Not only physically, but mentally. I don't know any other way to explain it, but that it was Jesus. It picked me up and I. Told me to keep pushing on and that everything was Yeah. Gonna be okay. And I, yeah, I couldn't have [00:27:00] made it through these last nine years without his guidance. I can tell you. No, not without, I don't know, I say this a lot, but ending up in a funny farm or something.

But and I know that when people are faced with unfortunate circumstances, whatever that might be, they, I think. Not everyone, but I feel like a lot of people either lean into their faith or walk away from it and it Yeah, for sure. That's totally understandable. Like I can understand both. But both sides 'cause it, it's not an easy thing to go through. Yeah. But I'm just extremely grateful that my faith is stronger than ever now through this journey.

So , those are my top. I could go on and on about the positive things that have came out of this, but those are probably, yeah, my big ones. But. What about you, Deonna? What do you think are the 

Deonna: Yeah, I, I agree with those things too. I thought that the nursing was a hassle and now these girls are like my sisters, . , But it's like they all feel that way, which I'm old enough to [00:28:00] be their much older sister, a lot of them. But it's that kind of feeling and it's crazy to have that feeling. And then yeah, the faith thing for sure, you just. You just sometimes. Don't even know how tough your life could possibly get until it gets that way.

And then you realize like, it's kind of corny, but you know, that footprints in the sand thing. It's very true. I was walking next to him for so long and I didn't really need him. I didn't feel like, I did, but I didn't. Feel like I did, but now you're just like, whoa.

I need him. Yeah. All day, every day. You're, my prayers have gotten less flowery and fake. Like it's more like, oh, oh Lord, help me do this. Oh my gosh. Like it's just way different, like Yeah. More desperate and stuff. But yeah, I feel all that stuff too. I was thinking about for me, because I still can get anxious about stuff sometimes, but I used to get anxious about like really stupid stuff. And [00:29:00] then now it's really hilarious to me because stuff that used to bother me, I'm like, whatever, who cares? And then I notice things. That I never would've noticed before. And we've talked about this a lot.

Mm-hmm. And it kind of showed up in some of these comments too, but I appreciate like very small things. I walk outside every day out on my porch and just let the sun be on my face and I. I never used to do stuff like that. Like I go outside and I can just feel this like freeze and the sun being warm and the smell of grass and just these things.

And I just feel like even though my life is way crazier than it ever probably would've been. I notice all the good things and just it's everywhere. All the good things are everywhere, but I feel like I was so busy living my life and hustling and keeping up with the Joneses or [00:30:00] whatever your thing is, yep. I didn't notice any of that, and so I see God and everything, and. I was thinking about some of these episodes and Lindsay from, I think it was season two, episode 32. It was Lindsay raising Ava, but she talks about how her daughter's smile means more to her than anything I. I remember the first time, Allie was like talking like everything was fine before her accident.

So we went about a year without hearing her talk, and I remember when her voice finally came back. I called my husband and we're just crying and crying. 'cause you hear her voice like. I would've never even appreciated her voice. I didn't care. Sure. She was talking, who cares?

And I know, yeah. Millions of other moms, feel this way about their kid. Yeah. Even just making like a sound. Exactly. So we're just more grateful for stuff and the. Like the tiny things are what life's about, and I didn't know that. And I'm always on Pinterest pinning, quotes and [00:31:00] things like that.

But I found this quote a few weeks ago and it was this author, his name's Elaine de Baton or something, I don't know. But he says, you normally have to be bashed around a bit by life to see the point of daffodil, sunset, and uneventful Nice days. And it's so true. Me and you have been bashed around.

All these parents that we talked to have been bashed around. Yeah. But then they have this perspective that has made our circles a lot smaller because they get it and we can instantly be fast friends with these people and it's just. Know, that's a huge deal to me. All these people we've talked to, they all become your friend.

Oh yeah. And even though we've never met a lot of 'em face to face, like they would try to do anything for you. So yeah that's been what mine's been for me. But what unexpected moments are, positive things have came out of the podcast for you. 'cause we've done.

Episodes two years. I know. [00:32:00] Lots of time us texting Dane's like you text Randall more than me. And I was like, I text Randall a hundred times more than you like. Same. Same. Oh my gosh. Dane's like, do y'all text every day? I'm like, at least once a day. Maybe at least. But yeah, that's what it's like to run something like this.

Oh yeah. 

Rhandyl: Yeah. It's just wild to think where we are now and then, who knows where we'll be. Yeah, we have a long ways to go. I knew, I knew for a while that I wanted to start a podcast. Yeah. For the disabled community specifically, I just had this, and I didn't know for a while that it was gonna be a podcast.

I just. There was something that I wanted to do and I, yeah. , Couldn't put my finger on it, but, and I had no idea where to start. And then whenever they started talking to you about it. Yeah. I think one of the biggest positive things for me is getting to know you, Deonna, and your family. We didn't really know each other, so Oh no. Like from a [00:33:00] surface level we knew. What our circumstances were, they were similar. The basics. Yeah. Yeah. But getting to know each other on such a personal level has been such a blessing over the last few years. Yeah. Getting to know Allie and Cole and Dane and just, it's just that's been awesome.

And then something that I didn't expect was how similar. I talked about this earlier, but how similar the majority of our guest perspectives on life are. Yeah. That we've spoken Oh, yeah. That we've spoke to over the last two years. I felt, I felt really alone in this journey. Most of the time. But I. And I think we all do at certain times for sure. But talking to various guests and following them on social media through our platform, just people that we, that follow us or that we find it's just like no matter what the circumstances, the diagnosis, it seems like so many of our feelings are parallel and so relatable.

Just feelings in general about frustrations about this [00:34:00] and not just the happy stuff, but we all have such similar feelings revolving this disabled community and Oh, for sure. But, and yeah, I just, I think it's crazy to think that it's been. Over two years since we launched our first episode, and even crazier that it's our 50th.

So I know timing we've met a lot of timing. Yeah. We've met a lot of goals for this podcast, you and I. Mm-hmm. But we have a lot of plans for the future and just, yeah. We're just getting started. Yeah. I'm just excited to grow and continue. Yeah. But what about you? What are your positive, unexpected from hosting this.

Deonna: I think it has been really good for me because a lot of disabilities outside of paralysis were really intimidating to me. Like we've talked about some of these disabilities, like autism in particular. I was really intimidated by that. I didn't know, I didn't understand it, [00:35:00] so it was just like.

Oh I'm afraid to even talk about this, yeah. And other people that we've talked to that are coming up here in the next few weeks have made me realize, there's no need to fear or feel any fear towards any of these disabilities, towards anyone that is disabled. And it's just made me, 'cause I got thrown into this just like you and everything, but, I don't know. I was so intimidated by everyone outside of just my own kid. And this podcast has taught me that we all have very big similarities. And even with dealing with other disabled people, if you treat them with love and kindness and dignity, like the other stuff's gonna work itself out.

Exactly. You don't have to know every detail of their diagnosis or anything, and you might make some mistakes. That's okay. And it's, it's made me realize how clueless I was before, and then just how people around us, some people really do wanna learn about this stuff, and that's why I [00:36:00] wanted to do this I wanted to share these stories, but I wanted to teach people outside of this what it's actually like and to tell the truth and not be like, I don't know.

Rhandyl: But sugarcoat it, 

Deonna: sugarcoating it like we do on Instagram or things like that on our personal stuff. But I saw this quote. By Spurgeon, who's this Christian author , but he said, pain if sanctified, which sanctified just means made pure or purified, create.

So it said, pain if sanctified creates tenderness towards others. And we've all been through really bad pain like you have. I have every person we've ever talked to on this podcast and thousands that have listened or are just going through what we're going through. Yeah. Like they've been through this bad pain, but , it's created this love and kindness and tenderness towards other people and it's made me more.

Thoughtful towards everybody. Not just disabled [00:37:00] people, but any sort of marginalized group or, yeah, I mean, I'm just so much more loving than I used to be. 'cause that didn't always come naturally to me. My brother, he was the loving one who was really generous and stuff about things.

I was the more like, uh, they'll get over it. They're fine. You know, That was my vibe. And so after joining this group, I'm like, oh, they may not get over it. They may be , really in pain. I need to try to talk to them about that. So it's helped me be more like soft around the edges.

Because I wasn't really like that before. More empathetic. Yeah. Oh yeah. Much more. I think that's the main takeaway, but, yeah, it's definitely impacted both of our lives in a good way and Oh yeah, made, it's made other people feel comfortable coming to us for help or sponsorship or, whatever the case may be because they know that's where our heart's at.

So that's. Been good too. But yeah, we we hope you guys [00:38:00] enjoyed, getting to go back down memory lane and take some advice from these other parents because they all have similar things to say, but their own unique and. Beautiful way of saying it. And so I've learned a lot from these other parents.

I know you have so every time we talk to somebody, we always like text each other. That was so good. I liked, how they said this, or whatever, so it's. It's been an educational thing for so many of us. But yes we're excited to celebrate 50 and we're gonna keep on going.

As long as people are listening, we're gonna keep going. Yes. 

Rhandyl: And yes. Thank you. Thank you all for listening. We wouldn't for sure be at 50th episode if we didn't have you guys listening and so No. If you haven't done so already, we would greatly appreciate. Some positive reviews.

Deonna: Yeah, reviews, subscribing, yes. Telling people about us. If you know [00:39:00] anyone who is even related to anyone who's disabled, , or wants to be an advocate and learn how to, do that better this is for you. So everybody belongs and we're so thankful that you guys have joined this crazy adventure with us.

**Disclaimer

Before we go, I wanna remind our listeners that this podcast is for the purpose of education and entertainment only, and is not a replacement for seeing a doctor. We suggest you seek out the help of a trained professional for help with your child's specific situation.