Episode 71 - Remember What's Important

Cydni: [00:00:00] this is Cydni 

Sher: and I'm Sher. And each week we get together to share with you a message of hope.

Cydni: It is through our own study and our personal experiences that we offer the reminder to not only seek the light, 

Sher: but be the light. You can find peace and there is hope

Cydni: and as long as one of us is slightly caffeinated, there will be laughter. 

Sher: Today's episode is remember what's important.

Cydni: And we're so glad you are here 

Sher: this month Cydni we are going to talk about Remembering. And today, we're going to talk about why it's important to remember.

So, what have you got over there, Cydni? 

Cydni: Okay, I have somewhat of a poem. You know, when that happens, when you're studying for something and you just know you need to use it. But then when you reflect on it, you're like, wait, how is this going to tie in? And you just have to have faith that it will work. I'm going to go with that right now. 

Sher: I'm looking forward to this. We're off to a hot start. 

Cydni: Remember you [00:01:00] are the dumpster fire. You know you are. Remember that. Anyhow, I'm going to read this to you and then it's all going to make sense eventually in time. The poem, though it doesn't rhyme, it's one of those poems. 

Sher: It's a bougie I

Cydni: was thinking lazy. . Alright, this is called You Carry All the Ingredients. You carry all the ingredients to turn your life into a nightmare. Don't mix them. You have all the genius to build a swing in your backyard for God. That sounds like a hell of a lot more fun. Let's start laughing, drawing blueprints, gathering our talented friends. I will help you. You carry all the ingredients to turn your existence into joy . Mix them. Mix them.

 Snap those fingers. Now, let me try to illustrate something to you because when I read this, I thought of the scripture that says the power is in you because we do have all the makings in us, all the ingredients to do and create whatever [00:02:00] life we want. And she says that we could turn our life into a nightmare or we could turn our life into our existence into joy.

And truly it's with the same ingredients. Meaning the same history, the same experiences, the same wisdom, the same thoughts, can either create something that's negative, Or something positive and it's truly dependent upon your outlook by that. I mean, you could say to yourself things are really good right now.

I'm sure they're going to get terrible again real soon. Or you could say things are really hard, but God has always helped me get through them and he'll help me get through this again. It's just up to us and our perspective and our attitude towards it if it's going to make us bitter or if it's going to make us better, as they say,

 so to tie this into history and remembrance, I was thinking that We have the ingredients of Our history, our family's history, the world's history, and our experiences with God, our experiences with friends, our experiences with anybody, our sorrows, our joys, [00:03:00] our laughters, those are all of the ingredients we have.

And if we mix it right, and we put the right perspective on, then the cake that we bake, It's so beautiful and there's things that we could gain from it just like mixing together a cake batter from the box because that's how everyone does it, right? Definitely. Nobody like actually makes one, right? Betty Crocker did that for us, 

Sher: I thought that's how you made cakes was from a box. You buy them at the 

Cydni: grocery store, costco delivers. , Costco, yes. but the cake that you get from putting on the perspectives and reflecting and remembering our history, that cake is what we're going to go over today. And I loved what Sher was writing because I read through her notes because it's a shared folder. hacked your system. So I loved how you reflected on why history matters. And learning history matters. . 

Sher: Actually, I have to come clean. I stole the points from a university that had them on their history site of why history is important. good way to do it. Well, you know, so the ingredients that go in our cake are the [00:04:00] first one is the past teaches us about the present and the second one is history or remembering builds empathy through studying the lives and struggles of others.

The next one is doing history or studying the past is like completing a puzzle or solving a mystery. And then the last point is everything and everyone has a history. So those are the ingredients of the cake that we're going to talk about today.

the first ingredient of the cake is the past teaches us about the present. as I was thinking about this, there's a very famous quote and it's said by different people, but I'm going to use the Winston Churchill version of it, which is those that fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it, which is true.

But on the flip side of it, if you study your history, , you can learn how to make that cake that actually tastes good and that you want to eat. When you study the past, you can learn what works in societies, countries, and individual lives.

 If we know what leads to success or failure, we can follow and choose the path we want. You can look at your own historical cycle [00:05:00] that you have in your own family, and then it's your choice. Do you wanna keep that going or do you need to change it?

Sher: And this is a really incredible gift that God has given us. He's given us the freedom and the liberty to make our own choices so that we get to decide what kind of cake or what kind of life that we want. Do we want to make it better or do we want to make it worse? But we're the ones that get to make that decision.

So the key to finding the pattern to fix. Like, for example, our country, our society, and our own life is remembering and studying the past because all the answers are there because everyone's done it all before. We may have more technology, but when you study the history, how people react, it's very similar. And you can see the outcomes of the choices that they made. When you look at the past choices of civilizations, countries, societies, or your own family, or you as an individual, those choices that you're making , or that country civilizations have made will predict your future. You can tell what is going to happen in the future by the choices that you're [00:06:00] making. And you can see all of that throughout. History. 

Cydni: What I found interesting is that a lot of people started off talking about history as if it's a chore. , you have to learn timelines and events. And then they would go into how untrue that is. If you are learning history that way, that if you need to know what day a war started and what day it ended You're not learning history. You're just studying dates and timelines and that is boring. You have to understand that history is not a what situation. It's a why. Why did that war happen? Why did people allow those things to happen to get to that place? And if you go about history and understanding it, then you ask why. which is helping you to become a critical thinker.

And that's why history is so amazing, is it helps us to learn, and it helps us to ask very difficult questions, and hopefully it will bring out a curiosity in us that will cause critical thinking and hopefully prevent future issues. [00:07:00] And so oftentimes I think, especially in schools, we go about it all wrong.

In my school growing up, it was always just dates. Here's a question, what date did this happen? It wasn't until out of high school that I started reading memoirs and learning about the people who lived in it, who experienced it. And then you feel so connected to them and you connect to what happened in that timeline.

Sher: You're making my old history teacher heart so happy right now. 

Cydni: It's to make up for all the things I've done wrong in the last month. This was all BS. Great. I'll take it. I don't even care. I'll take it right now. I asked Shelly, our friend, how do I make Cher happy for my mistakes? She said, just say this.

And so I did. Well, thank you, Shelly. Thanks for telling Cydni what to say. And , for me in history, I like to know about the people who experienced it. That brings it to life for me. And I believe if we are wise, we can learn from their experiences.

we did recently talk about near death experiences and another aspect of that I [00:08:00] like to listen to are people's deathbed regrets. That's heavy, I'm not listening to someone murder someone else like that's doesn't do it for me they're already dead and now they're just saying their last words.

Well, that's just creepy. But we can learn from them Cher. 

Sher: Yes, we can. 

Cydni: But really what's interesting is they said that 74 percent of people have the same regret which is They drank Pepsi over Coke. Yeah, I would regret that too. 

 The top regret was they did not live life the way they wanted to, the way their heart told them to. They lived a life to please others. they didn't reach their potential and their purpose.

So here's some other ones courage to be myself. I didn't spend enough time with people I really loved. I spent too much time working. I never took risk didn't realize that happiness really was just a choice.

I wish I would have loved more. I wish I took better care of myself. I wish I had stayed in touch with my real friends. I wish I spent less time chasing things that didn't really [00:09:00] matter. I wish I had touched more lives and used my talents for good.

I wish I traveled more. And another top one was I wish I lived in the moment. And honestly, this is humbling because this truly is coming from people who would soon pass after they said this, and we can learn from other people's experiences and it can become wisdom for us because we're breathing right now. So what are things that matter to you? This is why remembering and learning from other people's history matters is you never know what could go so wrong and what could change in an instant. So what do you need to do and change so that you don't feel regret at the end?

Sher: this is a reason why I've always loved studying history is because I love learning exactly what you just said. There's so much to learn about life in general, from studying the past, because the collective wisdom of people that have lived before us is immense. And it feels never ending. They are handing out bits of wisdom that they're [00:10:00] passing on to future generations, their children. And if we just stop and take a moment and listen to that, You can learn so much, just as you said, from the people that were on their deathbeds, what they wish they could have changed.

 These are things that we can change now while we're alive. And again, we're taking little pieces of that cake and deciding, what are we going to make with the ingredients that we have? Are we going to make it good or bad? 

Cydni: And technology changes. but people are always the same and humanity doesn't really change that much. . There's still loss and grief and disappointments. I mean, we have indoor plumbing, so we should probably be a little bit more grateful than some of these people. 

Sher: It was like you said, grief, emotions don't change. happiness and grief and sorrow and joy and all of these emotions, that's humanity, that's living, that's life. And you can see that throughout history.

Cydni: Ben and I just went on a walk the other night and he asked me, because we read completely different books, and he said, why do you read the books that you read? Which are, picture [00:11:00] books, just kidding. I love memoirs, and he asked why do you like to read about these people's lives? I hadn't really thought about it, not fully. But I realized it's because I feel like everybody has so much wisdom to offer if we listen. If they were moved upon to share their story, somewhere in there is a piece of wisdom. And I need it. I need to know people who had difficult circumstances were capable and proved that they could still turn to God and that they could still be good people and that they could still do great things in this world no matter what. And when I read those stories, it opens up my perspective and it helps me to be more compassionate and more loving. 

Sher: that leads us to the next reason. why remembering is important. Through studying history and remembering it builds empathy through studying the lives and struggles of others, which is what Cydni was just saying with reading her memoir. She likes to read. I know that when. Well, my dad, oh my [00:12:00] goodness, he was a storyteller. He could go on and on and on and on and on and on with stories, and when I would start to get tired of listening to all of his stories I would be like, okay, dad, I've heard this before. Please stop. He would always say, it's important you know this, it's important to remember how things were. So I just want to share a few things that I learned from my dad, from his stories he told over and over again. I learned that dynamite was used a lot more in the old days. I learned that school was a lot more strict and kids were still really super naughty. I learned that if you didn't have a lot of material things, it's okay as long as you have good family and good friends. I learned to stand up for what you believe because my grandparents sacrificed everything for me. I learned that the Japanese internment camps were really evil. I learned that the Great Depression sucked. I learned that medicine back then was crazy. My dad had maggots eat the infection in his leg. Oh my gosh. Gross, right? Yeah. My stomach just turned. Grateful for antibiotics [00:13:00] right now. Me too. I learned about my pioneer heritage and the sacrifices they made for me. I learned that my dad was the first civilian in Utah to ever use penicillin, he and another boy same day. What? Yep. That's wild. I know it. Risk taker. That's for sure. But these are the types of things that I learned. And some were funny, some were not so funny. Some were lessons learned and some was like, what in the crap were you doing dad? But it created a picture of what my parents life was like I learned how important knowing your history is and why knowing it helps you to move forward last month we talked about building a strong foundation and from my parents I learned that my foundation was started by men and women with a whole lot of grit.

There were women that were strong and they carried pistols in their bosoms and they stood for God and they stood for this country and their family. I learned that my ancestors created a better life for me so I could be a spoiled rotten little brat.

and I learned that that is part of my foundation. That's part of who I am. And it's helped to create [00:14:00] me and given me a foundation to start building my own foundation on. 

Cydni: I love the direction you went with that. I recently came back from a funeral, and I was able to speak with an aunt who we haven't seen each other, and we had the best conversation talking about family. I thought to myself, you know, I bet she knows a whole lot about my grandma that I don't know, so we started having the best conversation. So I remember on my grandma's that there were from the governor where she lived, there were all these awards. for civil service and things like that. And I always loved that about her, but my aunt told me that she was one of the founders for different foster care programs that now exist in Arizona.

And I found out so many amazing things just by asking a simple question that turned into one of the best conversations I've had in a long time. And we have such a long line in our family of social workers and teachers, and I just loved how everything I learned about my grandma just kind of tied together with the kind of people that they are, and I also found out when I was looking through our family tree that on the other side of the [00:15:00] family, my great, great, great Grandfather, Crockett, was the first mayor of Payson, Utah.

Sher: that's really cool. 

Cydni: I also found out that he left Nauvoo as a pioneer and made that journey, he left on July 4th, which I thought you'd appreciate. 

Sher: I do appreciate. That's really cool. 

Cydni: Yeah, he's probably like, get it together, Sid. We didn't do all of this for you to just, I don't know, what do you do?

Sher: I'm sure that's what all of our ancestors are saying is like, we worked our butts off. What are you guys doing? 

Cydni: I do think that sometimes I do too. Whenever I take the trash out, I think of pioneers. Does that count? I'm like, man, it's cold out here and I have to walk 20 feet and I'm like, they went miles and miles and miles. So then I say, thank you. 

Sher: That's good. 

Cydni: I'm sure they run back in, sit by the fire. And play on TikTok. 

Sher: They're so proud of us right now. 

Cydni: It is important though, to think about that. My friend Valaine was just talking about this and she said that sometimes when she's sitting in church, she thinks about her. Pioneer ancestry and how grateful she is to be a part of her religion and [00:16:00] what it took to get to where she is. She said that has really helped her on Sundays lately. 

Sher: I really liked that. 

Cydni: I did too. It was beautiful. 

Sher: Alright, our next ingredient in our cake is doing or studying history is like completing a puzzle or solving a mystery. One of the reasons that I love studying history so much is because you get to see how things have been put together.

if you want to know how our society got here, go back and study your history. So, for example, our Founding Fathers were so great at putting the puzzle together. They tried their very best to solve the puzzle of government. And so they studied ancient Greece and Roman governments. They studied Native American governments.

They studied ancient and renaissance philosophers. They understood the difference between feudalism, theocracies, monarchies, democracies, republics, but most of all. They studied the Bible and the government that God gave to Moses and the Israelites. And so they tried to solve the problem.

Of course, they didn't get it perfect, but we [00:17:00] do have the longest running Constitution in the entire world. Because they put a lot of effort into studying history and finding what worked and what didn't work. And remember that history has a lot of different puzzle pieces, and You need to look at all sides of history, not just one, because it's really cool when you find a new historical puzzle piece and insert it into the story.

So try to look at as many different views and opinions that are out there. And that's what our founders did when they were putting together this country. They really did try to look at All sides and all opinions of what makes a good government. 

Again, not perfect, but our constitution's kicking butt compared to others. 

Cydni: This made me think of how important it is to spend time studying the history of America because when you know the history of something. Then you have such a great love and appreciation for it. I listened to a TED Talk where he talked about with history, imagine there's a picture on the wall of a person that you know nothing about.[00:18:00] 

It's just a person. what would you feel towards that? You would just think, well, There's a person on the wall, but what if you knew that person? What if you understood that person's history? You understood why they made choices that they made. You understood where they came from, why they acted the way they did, what had happened to them in their life.

You would have love for them. And it's important that we do that. Spend time getting to know people and the history of where we live and the history where we come from because what that will do is put in us a deep rooted love for whatever it is that we're studying. I have seen that in my life because I, caught the World War II bug and had to learn everything about it. And now I love it. And that's how most people are because they start with a World War II biography. And it just speaks to them and when you invest in it, then you have a pure love for it, because you understand it, and somewhere in it, you related to it.

Sher: That reminds me have you ever been to the Holocaust museum in Washington DC? No. So that's exactly what they do is they give you a name of a [00:19:00] person that was in a concentration camp. And then you follow their story throughout the whole thing.

 It really is amazing. I'm just telling you, you should go there, but it like sucks all the emotion out of you by the time you're done, you're pretty much done for the day. Just keep that in mind if you go visit but it's definitely worth it.

Cydni: I've never done that, but I did in high school go through a postponing sexual involvement course where you had to choose your sexually transmitted disease or you got pregnant and then you have to watch a labor at the end. It just reminded me of that. 

Sher: That's exactly what I was saying. I mean, those are just almost identical it's life choices. I don't think a Holocaust survivor or victim had a choice in that, but nice try. 

Cydni: It felt like every book and biography I've ever read , the people just glared at me. They're like, how dare you read my story and say that crap? Really sorry. What a terrible person I'm sorry, grandma. I'm sorry. Great, great, great grandpa Crockett. I'm so sorry. Okay, 

I loved the idea you've put together with it being a puzzle one, just thinking about if something doesn't fit somewhere in history, there's an [00:20:00] answer to something that would fit better. Or just our own personal life Ben is understanding me more because we started reading about ADHD which is super offensive.

Sher: I don't know why is he learning about himself? I don't understand. No. No, ma'am. 

Cydni: You knew. He's so orderly and dedicated and focused. I am a mess. I didn't notice. Oh, thank you. Lies. I will take them. But Ben I told him once, kind of sarcastically, listen, if you really want to know about me and like why I do the things that I do, you could just read an ADHD article.

I've tried to read one, but I haven't got through it, but I'm assuming it probably tells about myself. So anyway, but he did, and then he started telling me about myself, which was Super rude. He's like ADHD people always. And I said, finish other people's sentences. And he's like, yes, because it's true. Anyway, it's like the worst. Cause I do fit sadly every single category. I know that everyone thinks it's cool and trendy to be ADHD, but let me tell you from someone who actually is, it's [00:21:00] not, it'll ruin your life or make it cooler.

Whatever. One of them, depending on the day.

Sher: You get to put that ingredient in the cake, Sid. So you get to decide. Right, 

Cydni: Yeah, Ben does. Ben gets to choose. Is it going to be a nightmare living with me? Or is his existence going to be joy? I hope he picks the joy. Okay, but this does work. I'm not just venting. It works because He actually does understand me a little bit more and he's like, Oh, it really is a thing. It's not just you. I thought only you in this entire world would do something like that. Only you put the dishwashing soap, in the fridge, but no other people do that kind of stuff too.

And so I think sometimes when we learn about other people and where we learn about ourselves then you understand why you do things the way that you do sometimes, and then you can find solutions if needed Or you could just accept that your partner's ADHD, whatever, whichever route you want to go.

But you can find solutions, you can find answers, and most importantly, you can be more empathetic and compassionate towards someone to understand that they're not just a terrible person. Not that ADHD people are terrible, [00:22:00] but just like in general, 

Sher: At the same time Remember that everyone and everything has a history. I have a history Cydni has a history And so do you. Everyone has that, and it helps to learn and remember your own history. I found something that I thought was pretty cool that research says about learning your own history and your own past. It said that remembering your own history, it helps you to recall your successes and failures. which helps you grow. And remembering fosters personal growth and self awareness. So when we reflect on our own life and study our own personal history, that will help us to understand, like you were saying, what ingredients are working in our cake and which ones we need to chuck out or get rid of and not, have them anymore.

 It also helps to remember how we were forgiven or people that have forgiven us and that the Savior has forgiven us because then we learn to forgive others. Also, I thought this was funny, remembering the instructions, [00:23:00] that's important. Now, as somebody that recently had a stroke, remembering the instructions have become something that's really important to me because I can't remember the instructions. and so I have to read them over and over again and when I saw that I laughed but It's okay to Review them. 

Cydni: You're not alone. Everybody, when they're making their cake batter from a box, throws away the box and pulls it out ten times. You're not alone, Sher 

Sher: thank you. Also remembering the voice, and I love this one, remembering the voice of a deceased parent or friend. is so important. And I know that Cydni has to put up with me all the time as I remember my parents and the advice that they have given to me. For the record, I quite enjoy what your parents said to you. Thank you. Remembering also plays a vital role in our relationships. When we remember important events, milestones, and deep details about the people we care about, it demonstrates our love, our care, and our attentiveness. And finally I found this and I just really loved it. President Eyring had some really great advice on how to remember, he said the key [00:24:00] to remembering that brings and maintains a Testimony now, I'm gonna throw in my own words. or remembering What God has done for you in your life remembering your foundation Remembering that you are a child of God remembering that God loves you. How do we remember all of that? This is what President Eyring said. The key to remembering is receiving the Holy Ghost as a companion. It is the Holy Ghost who helps us see what God has done for us. I love that because as somebody who recently is really struggling with short term memory. It helped me because I can, with the help of the Holy Ghost as my companion, the Holy Ghost can help me remember gratitude, humility how much I need God in my life.

The Savior's love for me and that I am His child. those are things the Holy Ghost can help all of us with. If we live righteously, to have his companionship. I needed to hear that. Because I do have a hard time remembering, [00:25:00] but knowing that the Holy Ghost can help me, it gave me a new confidence.

brings us to our final thoughts. Remembering is important to countries, civilizations, and individuals. We can take all the good and the bad and we can learn from it. We can decide what ingredients goes in our cake. Remembering helps us to have gratitude and a thankful heart. And if we strive for it, the Holy Ghost can help us remember that we are God's child and that he loves us.

Remember, it's never too late to change your historical cycle and the path that you're walking on. Learning and growing is all part of God's plan, and He wants us to learn from that. We can ask for help and turn to our Savior who is ready and waiting to help us start cycle that us back home to Him. 

Cydni: We challenge you this week to connect with the past in whichever way is most realistic for you. Whether it's going through your family history or whether it's learning something about the history of the world. We challenge you to find something, [00:26:00] connect to it, and maybe that will just grow a love for that topic.

 This is our prayer from Cydni and Sher where was I going with that? Who knows? I just was thinking I need to go to Costco now. 

Sher: Rudy do not eat. Are you kidding? Don't eat that blanket 

Cydni: Rudy He doesn't even look a little sorry Like why would you put a blanket here if you didn't want me to chew on it I recently went to a funeral and I was able to talk to an aunt who I hadn't spoken to for, that sounds like I, like we don't like each other. She likes me just fine. Okay. I mean, she doesn't send me a Christmas card, but just kidding.

She does. Okay. We'll try it one more time. 

Sher: Worth, worth, worthily. If we live righteously, 

Cydni: I thought you were going to say joke for a second.

It's a [00:27:00] joke. You're a total joke, Sid. 

Have a good 

Sher: week. Bye