
Cydni and Sher
Life will give us reasons to feel discouraged, disheartened and broken. We choose to take from these moments reasons to find courage, hope and wholeness. When life tries to crack us, we choose to crack up. When we are too weary, we seek strength. When life feels too dark, we remind ourselves from words in the Hebrews “we are not of them who draw back.” Rather we choose to move forward Together.
Cydni and Sher discuss stories from the scriptures, history and their own experiences finding a common truth that there is purpose, meaning and learning to be done all directed by an all powerful, wise and loving God. Come laugh with us or at us, either way we are so glad you are here.
Cydni and Sher
Happiness is Your Birthright
In this week's episode, Cydni and Sher kick off a year-long deep dive into the pursuit of happiness. With humor and personal anecdotes—including a memorable fall into dog vomit—they remind us that happiness is our birthright. The discussion explores the importance of creation, compassion, and perseverance in finding joy. Touching on wisdom from religious leaders and personal reflections, they encourage listeners to reflect, take action, and embrace everyday moments of happiness. This episode is "Happiness is Your Birthright" and we are so glad you are here!
This Week's Challenge
Take time to reflect: Do you have a testimony of your divine identity? If not, ask God with real intent who you are and if you are His, and consider what brings you true happiness—then focus on doing more of those things.
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Show Notes
Drip-Drip Drop, Words and Music by Matt Hoiland
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Episode 92 - Happiness is Your Birthright
[00:00:00] this is Cydni
Sher: and I'm Sher. And each week we get together to share with you a message of hope.
Cydni: It is through our own study and our personal experiences that we offer the reminder to not only seek the light,
Sher: but be the light. You can find peace and there is hope
Cydni: and as long as one of us is slightly caffeinated, there will be laughter.
Sher: Today's episode is Happiness is your birthright.
Cydni: And we're so glad you are here
Sher: Okay, Cydni, , we kind of decided to switch things up a little bit this year. And we decided that we wanted to do like a deep dive for the entire year about the pursuit of happiness.
Some of the things that we wanted to think about throughout the year is what does the pursuit of happiness mean? And how do we accomplish it? So we're going to take our time and we're going to really investigate what it truly [00:01:00] means to pursue happiness.
Cydni: I think we should share first that we considered other options before we went with happiness, because we thought maybe we should quit and start a taco club where we just go eat food and say , what we could have been. We thought about that. We thought about a fight club, but that didn't make any sense for podcasting because the first rule of the fight club is knock somebody's teeth out. Never talk about fight club. Oh, so that wouldn't be good for content. So, here we are deciding to dive deep into happiness.
And it makes sense for us because we spend a lot of time researching and learning and we thought as happy as we are, I'm so happy learning the lyrics to Son of a Preacher Man. You know that song? Yeah, of course. Na, na, na. The only man who could ever reach me was the son of a preacher man. I love that song so much.
What the crap? And why? because it's real. It's my real life. I love it so much. I've been learning that, song and I've been mopping and I was thinking, these floors look [00:02:00] so good. In fact, if you come over and my floors are especially clean, just know that song hit and that does bring me happiness, but we thought there could be more happiness than just that.
And not to mention in our reading, we did read that simple and weak things are what God calls. And we said to ourselves, never has a scripture jumped out at us so much than the simple and weak. That's so true. Yeah. I was like, I'm not that simple. Like I'm complicated, but I'm like a simple complicated.
I'm pretty simple. Okay. Well, I'm not weak. I won a pushup contest about 15 years ago. And you're pretty strong. Sher
Sher: Not as strong as I used to be. Nobody
Cydni: has to know that.
Sher: Oh yeah.
Cydni: But still never has a scripture touched our hearts so deeply then that God calls the simple and weak. And we thought, you know what? We got to keep doing this, but if we're going to do this, we should seek after the promise of a deep happiness and joy in our life, more than just mopping our floors. Right [00:03:00] Sher?
Sher: Absolutely. I completely agree.
Cydni: But this has led to some really reflective questions. And I just can't help but always think about this because we're told men are that they might have joy. And you think, but are they? Because we are told we are here on earth for the work and the glory of God and that we are to have joy.
And then God lovingly gives us these trials that will deeply cut our soul personally, that will rock our core and flip over our boat. So customized. He knows us so well that he knows exactly how to break us. And we just have to wonder, what about that part about joy? I'm a little confused as I'm in fetal position in my car pool lane, crying to the only man who could ever.
Do you want me to keep going with that? No,
Sher: please stop. That is definitely taking away the joy.
Cydni: Podcast, not singer. I gave that up. It's okay. I'm never going to be Reba. It could be [00:04:00] karaoke, Reba, I did get a karaoke machine for Yana for Christmas, two mics, me, her, Thursdays, 7 p. m. I can't wait. Only one song will be repeated. But we wonder, what about this joy? Really? We're told we're going to have joy. It's written in the scripture. So that's real. But then like, how often are we crying? And we're sad. And we're like, how are we going to get through this? Because this is not at all, even a little bit how I saw life going.
So what is going on? . And I think that's okay to think about. Because then the next question I thought is why then do we even care about being joyful or happy and there's reasons according to Google YouTube and TEDx speakers. They said that when you feel good, you perform better, you think better, you are more creative, you make better decisions, you're more outgoing, you have more energy, you're more engaged, you're more productive, more resilient, and you're healthier.
So if you're out there wondering about this [00:05:00] plan of joy. Well, things are just not going right. And it's only the beginning of the year. So you're really confused because you're like, all these new year's resolutions are already done. We're going to start in 2026. if you're out there wondering why even care, there's some reasons. There's actually benefits to being happy Sher. Who would have thought? So, if there's a reasons to be happy, the next reflective question is, do, do we We deserve to be happy. What do you think about that question? Do I deserve to be happy?
Sher: I think that a lot of people, including myself, I'll look at other people and think, oh yeah, they definitely deserve to be happy. But then when it comes to me, I'm like, well, maybe I don't deserve to be as happy as somebody else.
Cydni: That was exactly how my mind worked too, is I really got stuck on, do I deserve to be happy? And I thought, I know myself too well. I know how I think, I know the secret thoughts I have. I know how I act sometimes when I'm tired. So do I feel like I deserve to be happy? Probably not sometimes. But when I look at other people, like you said, I think that [00:06:00] person absolutely deserves to be happy. I think it's satan at work. Absolutely. So we're not going to let that happen anymore. Not after this episode. You're going to be so pumped up to not let Satan take away your own happiness. You will see why being happy yourself will help others to let their happiness come out too.
Sher: Yeah, that is how it works.
Cydni: Or we could go back to the fight club situation. We might be more successful at that. I know. I feel deep rage. Here's another one. Why do we feel like we can't be happy right now? Here's some things that I wrote down. No, I didn't write them down. I'm saying them free style. I think as a Christian woman, it feels natural to believe that we have to go through a struggle to be a saint, that you have to go through the fire to be polished and to be perfected. And it feels to me that I'm stuck in this idea that I have to suffer. Before I could be happy.
Sher: I agree. I think that we all do that. Honestly, I feel like that probably too much.
Cydni: I remember thinking [00:07:00] as a child when I'd get so mad at my brothers. I would say oh Just wait till the judgment day then you'll know you were wrong And I just always put off this idea that in the next life That is when I'd feel peace about a situation, or I'd be given permission to feel joy then, but that this life was for suffering. And that's false. We are meant to have joy now, no matter what is going on. The circumstance doesn't matter. We are meant to have joy. Which sounds crazy.
Sher: It really does, it sounds impossible. Which is why we wanted , to do a deep dive with it.
Cydni: Exactly, because one day we're going to be happy when we're dead, or let's be happy during our trials. Both sound a little crazy. So here we are discussing it. Another reason we struggle with being happy is we don't let ourselves be happy because we're afraid of losing it. We worry too much about the future that we don't enjoy the present. And if we stay unhappy, it creates a sense of control. And that feels nice to be in control. So you say you joy and happiness get away from me. Not [00:08:00] today. I'm going to maintain misery. Or another is that it becomes our identity or an excuse to not accomplish the things that we know we're supposed to accomplish because we're too tired and unhappy that we can't go after it. So we hold on to it because it's more comfortable staying in the pain that we're in than to try out some new pain , and the unknown.
We have found in the last few years of podcasting that if you spend time reflecting on some of these questions, you'll start to get answers that begin to be real to you it becomes part of your core, that you have an understanding of why you should be happy, why you deserve to be happy.
And a statement I love so much about happiness is that happiness is a state of mind that exists when desires are absent. I'll say it one more time. Happiness is a state of mind that exists when desires are absent. That to me is the gospel of Jesus Christ. Not a promise that we could have everything we've ever wanted, but a promise that we could have happiness and we could have [00:09:00] joy no matter the circumstance because of the hope that is in us. When we talked about if we deserve happiness, Sher had such a beautiful insight that led to the title that happiness is our birthright. Do we deserve happiness? That gets a little bit tricky. But is happiness our birthright? Yes it is.
Sher: And that's what we're going to talk about today. there is a talk by President Uchtdorf from 2008 and he said that our Heavenly Father is happy. And President Uchtdorf was contemplating on, what makes our Father in Heaven happy? And he noticed some patterns, some things that were consistently throughout the scriptures. And those two things that he noticed that our Heavenly Father is constantly doing over and over again. Well, a lot, because he's God, he can do everything. But there are two themes that he found. And one is that He is a God of creation, and he is a God of compassion. And he does both of them perfectly and cheerfully. And so today, I thought maybe [00:10:00] we could talk a little bit about that. To follow the example of our Father in Heaven who creates and who has, thank goodness, overwhelming compassion.
So The first thing is being able to create. Uchtdorf said, our birthright and the purpose of our great voyage on this earth. Is to seek and experience eternal happiness. One of the ways we can find this is by creating things. let's just talk about this for just a second.
Our birthright is to seek and experience eternal happiness. Some days this is going to be a super difficult task. A few years ago with another dog that I had, his name is Van. Van apparently got sick in the middle of the night. I didn't hear it, and he vomited all over the floor.
I mean it was, a huge mess. I did not see it and I got up in the morning. I was walking through the kitchen having no idea that I was about to enter into a dog vomit zone and I stepped directly in it and I fell right on my butt in the [00:11:00] dog vomit. You did not smell it? No, I didn't smell it. I was just la la la walking through the kitchen and kabam.
And when you're down on the ground face to face with this vomit. Did you smell it then? my hands were in it, so then I could smell it was awesome. So I obviously was not happy after this. That's not a good way to start your morning. That was the first thing that happened in the morning, I wasn't happy about it. But I chose to tell some of my students about it when I got to work. I asked them how their day was. And they would say, it was fine. And I would say, did you fall in dog vomit today? And they would say no. And I'm like, well, I did. and then it just became kind of a joke. Right. And then I told the teachers that I worked with about it as well.
And we all were laughing about it and thought it was super funny that I fell in dog vomit. Then one of the teachers said to me, after we got done laughing, he said, I'm so glad you're okay. I know it's silly, but that made me so happy that he was glad that I was okay.
I was so grateful that one, he cared enough to ask me if I was okay. And [00:12:00] second, it was the first time that I had realized that I should be grateful that I didn't break anything. I didn't break my hip. I didn't break my butt. I didn't break a wrist. I just fell in dog vomit. It didn't go in your mouth? It didn't go in my mouth. All of these things are things to be grateful for. If it did, you wouldn't tell anybody anyway,
Cydni: I don't know. It only was on my hand for sure.
Sher: Fair point. So we can choose to focus on the dog vomit or we can focus that I didn't break.
And So this brings me back to our birthright. Our birthright is to seek and experience eternal happiness. When we focus on our birthright, that is what starts to bring the joy and the happiness into our heart.
Yes, bad things are going to happen and you're going to fall and dog vomit, but what things can you get out of it that we learned from, that you can grow from, And how God was there in the middle of it. The example that comes to mind, honestly, [00:13:00] was when I had a stroke. When I think of all the blessings that I had and protection that I had, all the things that could have been worse, or it could have gone wrong, or how it could have been escalated in some way. Everything seemed to fall right into place. Just the mere fact that I was retired and I didn't have to be forced out of a job and a career that I loved that I chose it on my own terms just, that is an amazing blessing.
And so those are the things that if we focus on the good that came out of it and how God was still there with you, that will help us to be happy.
Cydni: I love that. Happiness and joy are our birthright. And dog vomit days are just part of the life that we're going to be in, but no matter how much vomit, Sher, you fall in, that God is going to stay with you and you could still be happy with that droopy mess. Right. That's inspiring. You never know when the dog vomit's going to appear, but it's going to be there. Dog vomit days.
Sher: Yes, they do. So what do we do though when we're just not having it? No matter what we're going to, fall in the dog vomit and [00:14:00] we're just going to stay there.
I really like that. President Uchtdorf said creating can make you happy. It's an action. You're not just hoping that you will be happy. You're taking control of it. president Uchtdorf said . Creation means bringing into existence something that did not exist before.
Colorful gardens, homes, family memories, flowing laughter. What you create doesn't have to be perfect. Don't let fear of failure discourage you. Don't let the voice of critics paralyze you, whether that voice comes from outside or the inside. He said that if we feel incapable of creating anything, then start super small.
Try to see how many smiles you can create. Write a letter of appreciation. Learn a new skill. Identify a space and beautify it. As you take the normal opportunities of your daily life and create something of beauty and helpfulness, you improve not only the world around you, but also the world within you.
So what I like about this is that creating something [00:15:00] good and positive is as easy as smiling at somebody. So yes, you may be in the dog vomit, and you may have it on you, but can you still make somebody else smile? And can you still kind of roll with it, so to speak, and let it slide off your hands?
Cydni: Let it soak in a little bit. Something you said really stuck out to me because it would be absolutely ridiculous give up and sit in the dog vomit. That would be ridiculous to stay there, to be like, well, I'm I'm in dog vomit and here I stay. It's not going to work out. Anybody, mostly normal thinking person would see how absurd that is. But then I thought, how often we do that? We just stay in a situation that is not making us happy. We just stay being miserable for different reasons it's as ridiculous as staying in dog vomit.
Sher: It is. And it could be because we don't think we deserve it. It's because we think this was meant for us. That we're supposed to be miserable like we were saying before all of those reasons are the reasons that We [00:16:00] choose to stay in the mess that we fell in. Instead of another thing I really liked about President Uchtdorf's quote is that bringing happiness into your soul is making your space inside you and around you better.
I was thinking about this. Isn't that what God does? he makes inside and outside better. Everywhere, everything is better because of God. And remember, President Uchtdorf said, being happy is our birthright. Our Father in Heaven is the ultimate perfection of happiness.
And He creates everything around Him better. And we're His child, He wants that for us, because we are His children, and that is our birthright. And because of that because of that God wants to pass it on to us. It's there for the taking, but the key is we have to be the ones taking the action and we need to do something about it.
Creating good vibes in the world. Seems like a really good place to start just doing that. Just taking control and action over what you're doing. Just that alone, not only could change you, [00:17:00] but change the lives of people around you.
Cydni: Creation would never have been a word I would have thought of when it comes to happiness, but now it makes so much sense because when you're in a state of creation or a state of flow whether you're a writer and the words are coming to you or you play music and it's just flowing, there is such a beautiful power in that.
I've watched my son as he's been practicing for a solo in his cello concert he has coming up. Some days, He tries and he just stumbles all over and he gets so frustrated and some days he's this is my day and it's beautiful and it flows and it is godly and if we are to be like God, then of course we'd be creators.
It reminds me of a quote by Elder B. H. Roberts. It says, the man who so walks in the light and wisdom and power of God will at the last, by the very force of association, make the light and wisdom and power of God, his own weaving those bright rays into a chain divine [00:18:00] linking himself forever to God and God to him. I'm really glad that you use the creation idea with this to help me understand that not only am I God's child, but I am to be like Him. And that means we're all supposed to have this confidence.
In our own talents and use those to create new things. And I'm grateful that it said not perfect, but new, just keep trying. One thought I also had I think sometimes you have to acknowledge that you might be sitting in dog vomit and that really stinks.
I think it's difficult to ask yourself, am I sitting in dog vomit and do I need to move? What I mean by that. Is, have you ever paused and just thought to yourself, am I happy? And that's really scary to do because the answer could be no. And then what? And unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, I did this this summer because our summer was chaotic.
We had too many practices. We had too many run here, run there, run everywhere. Situations going on that we just [00:19:00] never were together as a family. It was a fight to get people out the door to go where they needed to go. And we neglected two of the kids at a time to take care of the other one. And it was chaos.
And I do remember just asking myself. Are we happy? And I was so sad to hear no, we're not. And I felt like a failure as a mother and as a wife and as someone who's trying to help run a household together, that it's not going the way we want it to go. And we were quite miserable and everyone was grouchy and it was chaos and it wasn't fun.
Ben and I were on a walk one evening and he had told me that the new vehicle that we ordered was ready and we have a brand new, beautiful dream color car for me waiting and it should be ready within a week or two.
And on this walk, we passed a camper and I said, what if Ben, what if we didn't get that car? What if we got a camper? And he said, what would we do with a camper? And I said, I think people camp in a camper. What if we did that? I'll [00:20:00] ask Sher, she knows. And I said, truly, what if we made a change? We have to face the fact that we're in dog vomit right now and we don't want to stay there.
And we have to face the fact that we put ourselves in this dog vomit and we have to then be able to accept that we can get ourselves out of this dog vomit. And with that, we both thought, no, that's a dream car. We're going to get it. And then we carried on. But the next day, Ben texted me from work since he works in the car business.
And he said, well, there's an old Tahoe that just came in. We have to make a decision right away because it will sell fast. It's old and it's old. But if we got this, maybe we could get a camper. Maybe we could change some things. And we agreed. We would do it and sometimes we have to put forth an effort to make change to do something different and let's be real.
It's going to be scary sometimes because I thought all our neighbors are going to think you're losing your job because now we're getting this old beat up car and we have to like worry about what people are going to think about that. And that's real. And then I thought that doesn't [00:21:00] matter. Our family is not happy.
We're in dog vomit time to move. And so we got an old Tahoe. And can I just tell you the changes that have happened because of that choice, because it gave us confidence in one choice. We've made other choices and other choices that are all benefiting our family.
And I feel like our family is in the best groove we've been in, in a long time. , we have made trips that we never would have made. We're going up the mountain. We're With snow gear to do snow sports that I never ever would have ever agreed to doing. But we made the change. We got out. And I think the most beautiful thing is that with the power of creation, we can create a new start at any time.
That we can say, no, I don't want to sit here anymore. It stinks and it's slimy and it's gross and I'm going to make a change. And we have the power to create a new life no matter when.
Sher: And that's the key is that we need to be the one to take that action. God gives us agency to choose and it's up to us to make that decision. But once we make that decision, [00:22:00] God's going to be there for us and cheer us on and encourage us and help us get to where we need to be.
Cydni: But be careful, you might become a skier and that's a whole new level of dog vomit.
Sher: The next thing that President Uchtdorf talked about is our Heavenly Father is compassionate.
Imagine what would happen to all of us if he wasn't compassionate. That would be a tragedy.
Cydni: There's a few instances in the Bible that are a little intense. A little iffy. Sometimes that tough love is good. And they were all burned to a crisp.
Sher: Try a new batch. Be happy next time.
And I think about it when we are not compassionate as individuals, we Or as a family or as a society, look at what happens to the world and environment around us. It doesn't work out so well. So I was thinking about this and if people were all just compassionate in the world, there wouldn't be a mess anymore.
If people could just do that one little [00:23:00] thing, there wouldn't be a dumpster fire mess with the world burning down. Just that One little change. President Uchtdorf said, When we reach out to bless the lives of others, our lives are blessed as well. Service and sacrifice open the windows of heaven, allowing choice blessings to descend upon us.
Surely, our beloved Heavenly Father smiles upon those who care for the least of His children. He goes on to quote the author of Peter Pan, who said, Those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves. So, The more kindness, compassion, service, the more sunshine that we send out, the more we give ourselves.
And so it just keeps filling us up. Also, President Uchtdorf said it allows us to receive choice blessings that will just descend upon us. So for those of you that are selfish and don't want to be compassionate, think about this. You will get so many more blessings and so much sunshine into your life if you will just show compassion to others.
Cydni: So like I'm not good [00:24:00] because I'm good. I'm good because I believe in karma. Yeah. And I want to win the lotto.
Sher: Yeah, that works really well because, , God doesn't look upon your heart.
So maybe we shouldn't try that one. do it because we want to be good.
Cydni: Right. That would be ideal. But can I just say it's a little bit funny that the author of Peter Pan talked about bringing sunshine into the lives of others, has a story of kids that don't need supervision.
So he was really reaching out to every parent. Ever. That's out there. He's imagine guys, a world where no parents are needed. You have all the free time that you need. So I think he really did believe that.
Sher: Thanks for that deep insight, Cydni. You're welcome. It just came to me right now. President Uchtdorf further said, I believe that as you immerse yourself in the work of our Father, As you create beauty and as you are compassionate to others, God will encircle you in the arms of his love. inadequacy, and weariness will give way to a life of meaning, grace, and fulfillment. I love that quote. [00:25:00] I love that if we create And if we are compassionate that God will encircle us in the arms of His love as we continue to do those two things Discouragement and inadequacy and weariness will give way to a meaning of grace and fulfillment I really like the idea of all of that.
I love it. I like that plan and that's the plan that I want to be on. Now the key is again, I can't just like that. But I have to act on it. I have to be willing to put in the work and the effort to create, and I also need to be willing to be compassionate to those around me. That's what I need to do if I want to keep my birthright that is mine because I am a daughter of God.
Cydni: , I think the idea of perseverance is important in this because we often will face times where we feel like we're doing everything right and everything goes wrong. Jeffrey R. Holland actually talks about perseverance in such a beautiful way. When he was asked in an interview, I am trying and my life [00:26:00] is falling apart and I try harder and it falls apart more.
And as I try harder, once again, It falls apart, and I keep trying. I keep trying to become better, and I keep failing. What do you have to say to that? And he said this, What if perseverance and determination to just keep trying is greater than all those other virtues put together?
Seems to me that maybe it is. I love the idea that we can keep trying, that we could keep trying to understand our own identity, that we could keep trying to understand the gospel of Christ, that we could keep trying to pray, that we could do the basics over and over. And I really believe as I've reflected through my own life that we can find absolute joy. In the hardest circumstances, and when we've gone through trials, and we've kept trying that there is a greater strength and a greater testimony given to us because we look back and we see that we were never were alone in the dog vomit
Sher: that God was encircling us in the arms of his love. He's [00:27:00] always there. This brings us to our final thoughts. Happiness is our birthright. Our Heavenly Father is happy and we can also be happy when we create and we show compassion. We are his children and he wants to pass that. happiness, that birthright happiness onto us. But again, we need to take action and we're the ones that need to pick ourselves up out of the dog vomit, go clean ourselves off and start all over.
If we have to, we hope that you join us on our journey this year to take a deep dive into the pursuit of happiness. So that we can all learn together.
Cydni: We challenge you to spend some time with some reflective questions. Answer them and understand, one, do you have a testimony of your divine identity? If you do not, Ask God, but don't ask him like a child trying to get more screen time in a quiet little whisper, but really ask him. Ask God who you are and if you are His. Ask yourself what makes you happy and ask yourself what are the things that [00:28:00] bring me true happiness and we challenge you to start doing more of those This is our prayer from Cydni and Sher we're so happy.
Sher: We're so happy. We are happy. Happy. I'm happy. So happy. I happy. I'm happy. Happy. Okay.
Cydni: I am happy. I am happy. . got this. That wasn't a positive affirmation. That was real. I just have to look at highlighted words, which I didn't highlight, but I was going to.
You're doing a good job with Rudy on your shoulder, like a parrot. Rudy the parrot. I want to say one thing. No, I want to say seven things if that's okay and I won't be long or it will be one of those. Have a great week