FIFA World Cup 101 for Beginners: How It Works, Who Can Win & the Messi vs. Ronaldo GOAT Debate

Hoops for Hotties is back and this week we are stepping outside of our comfort zone because the World Cup starts today and we are not going to be left out.

This is our FIFA World Cup 2026 crash course, and yes, we explained the whole thing! Miss France, Miss Brazil, Miss England, Miss USA are all here and they all have a storyline. If you have never watched a full football match in your life, this episode is your entry point. We cover how the sport actually works, the positions, the cards, penalty kicks, what offsides means (kind of), and the lingo you need to sound like you've been watching forever.

We are learning together this World Cup and we are not embarrassed about it.

TIMESTAMPS: 
4:27 Part 1: How Soccer/Football Actually Works
6:01 The Basic Rules: No Hands, Two Halves, Clock Counts Up
8:09 Why Scoring Is So Hard & Why That Makes It Beautiful
9:06 Positions Explained: Forwards, Midfielders, Defenders & Goalkeeper
11:01 Cards, Fouls & Penalty Kicks Explained
12:59 Ties, Extra Time & Penalty Shootouts
13:55 Part 2: What Is the FIFA World Cup?
15:00 Part 3: How the Tournament Works
15:00 Group Stage = First Impressions
7:00 Round of 32, Quarterfinals, Semis & the Final
18:00 Part 4: Meet the Teams: World Cup 2026
18:00 Argentina: The Defending Champion
19:00 Spain: The Number One Ranked Team
20:00 Morocco: The Host Country Wildcard
21:55 England: Always Hyped, Always Heartbroken
23:10 USA: The Host Who Might Go to Bed Before Her Own Party Ends
24:17 Brazil: The Most Decorated Country in History
25:23 France: The Talent Is There If the Drama Doesn't Get in the Way
27:02 Part 5: Messi vs. Ronaldo: Their Last World Cup
29:25 Part 6: Who Could Actually Win?
30:23 Part 7: The Lingo Football Terms You Need to Know

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📱 Follow on Instagram: @hoopsforhotties
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🎧 Listen on Spotify: https://bit.ly/3SksWUt

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

I saw the funniest TikTok the other day from a girl from Atlanta celebrating that foreign fine shit was gonna be in Atlanta. She said, girl, you don't gotta go out of the country. Out of the country is coming to us. I looked up what games we got in Atlanta. We got Morocco, bitch. We got Spain, bitch. They're gonna be Spanish nigga, but it's Moroccan niggas. Like, and I said, Yeah, this is what the World Cup is all about. Y'all, welcome back to Hoops for Hotties, the classroom for all things sports for the girls, the gays, the days, and the straight men who don't admit they're not watching sports. And happy Pride Month to the girls, the gays, and the days. Supporting me, keeping my pockets lined, keeping me supported. We're all enjoying sports together. What a beautiful life we live. Today I am going to be having my World Cup special. Woo! My World Cup extravaganza. I'm so excited because this is such a new domain for me, y'all. The football world. Football. Okay, not with the pads, the one with the feet, bitch. I have never been super into football, like world football slash soccer, okay? It was just never really my sport. I tried it, it was the first sport I ever tried, and I kicked the ball into the wrong goal, and I was like, this isn't for me. This is just too much running back and forth with very little joy for me. I am not a patient person waiting on scoring a goal for it to really us to all celebrate and cheer. And I just don't have that kind of patience in me. It wasn't the sport for me, I don't have the agility. I just not a runner, and I just, you know, I'm American. I'm stupid as fuck. And it's the biggest sport in the world. And unfortunately, I didn't grow up with it. And now that the World Cup has come to North America and it's coming to my city, Atlanta, I'm just so excited about it in a different sort of way. The World Cup only happens every four years, right? And it's the biggest sporting event in the world. It's bigger than the Super Bowl, it's bigger than the Olympics. And I want to engage with it this year. The Olympics being so much fun the last couple of times, the Paris Olympics, and then the Winter Olympics specifically. Us having our first Winter Olympics with TikTok and with social media, I just engaged with it in a different sort of way. I fell in love with all the characters. I fell in love with free skiing and sports that I never would have thought I'd be watching. I was enjoying to the fullest. And I want to have that experience with the beautiful game, with the world's biggest sport. I want to experience it as a sports girl. I got some backlash on the gram when I was saying that I was gonna be covering the World Cup this year because they were like, girl, that's not your sport, bitch. This is hoops for hotties. This is hoops. First of all, I made the username when I was what, 21, 22, 20. I started this content five years ago, four years ago, forever ago, bitch. I was a child. I limited myself to one sport because that was the only sport I was interested in, really at the time was basketball. Uh it was basketball and then reality TV, bitch. That's all I really engaged with. And then I got into the NFL and I was like, holy shit, this is a whole new world. Oh, I've I've always been into college football. Okay, I got to I'm University of Georgia down. I'm into college football. But I was engaging with football in a way I never had before. I fell so deeply in love with the NFL. I was like, wow, there really are beautiful sports outside of basketball. I'm really limiting my enjoyment of sports, and I'm coming at you with this lesson about the FIFA World Cup, not from a place as an expert or like I'm talking down to you, or I know more than you about soccer because I probably don't. I know just as much as you. I did all this research for the past few days and I've studied to tell you this information. So my information that I'm telling you is verified and I've checked in on it. But if I make a mistake here or there, we are learning together. Please let me know in the comments and also let me know in the comments who your favorite football creators are slash soccer. Please let me know who are the girls and the gays and the, you know, some straight men if they cool, you know, don't point me in the direction of no fucking losers. But who are the people who are moving the needle in the football world so I can follow them if all along with their journey and learn more and share what I learned with you as well. And I will always credit the people who paved the way in the game. I just don't really know who they are yet because this is a new sport, this is a new domain for me. Now, without further ado, I have notes. Of course, I have my handy-dandy paper notes, and I also have a slideshow. I haven't made y'all a slideshow in so long. I spent entirely too long on this shit on Canva. And so I am going to share my screen now and we are going to get into my presentation. So, the way I've decided to break down the World Cup this year, you guys know if you've been to my channel before or if you follow me on TikTok that I love a good old-fashioned analogy to explain something to the girls. And we are going to be explaining the World Cup as though it were a beauty pageant. Do I know anything about beauty pageants either? Not really. I don't think I've ever watched a beauty pageant in full. Like, could give a fuck about beauty pageant. But it was just more of a fun way to look at it. Looking at the World Cup as if all the countries and the teams were the girls and like explaining it in this way. So don't be turned off by the beauty pageant analogy if you don't know shit about pageants. This is really gonna be entry level. Okay. Welcome to Miss World Cup 2026 with your host, Mariah Rose. And I'm not Steve Harvey, so I'm not gonna crown the wrong queen. I know that's right. Yes, bitch. We are gonna start with how soccer actually works. This is part one. Before any of the World Cup stuff, I wanna start by explaining the sport itself because a big chunk of my audience has never watched a full match. I have. I actually went to PSG versus Man City in Paris and it was an incredible experience. I've been to a few matches and I've also watched a couple matches on TV. So I've seen a match before. Did I fully know what was going on? No. So, you know, if this sounds like basic knowledge to you, skip this part. There are times there are timestamps in the fucking description. But for those of us who need to, you know, re-up on our soccer knowledge, our football knowledge, this is for you. So the sport is two teams of 11 trying to kick a ball into the other team's net. And whoever scores more points wins. Everything else I'm gonna tell you is just detail stacked on top of that. Okay. Each team has 11 players. One is the goalkeeper who guards the net, and the other 10 run around trying to score or stop the other team from scoring. Just like every other sport. Someone's on offense and someone's on defense. The one rule that made soccer, soccer, and I'm referring to it as soccer here just because sometimes that's sports of habit for me, okay? Please don't jump down my throat, okay? Football, soccer, football, soccer. We're using them interchangeably here. But after today, I promise I will use the proper term football forever. Nobody is allowed to touch the ball with their hands or arms. Okay? The only exception is the goalie. And even she can only use her hands inside of her own little box besides the net. And we'll get into that in a second. Everyone else uses their feet, thighs, chest, and head. Yes, they hit the ball with their head on purpose. Okay, this is the part about football that confuses Americans the most is the timing. Okay, it is split up into two 45-minute halves with a 15-minute halftime. There are no plays, no downs, no timeouts, no stopping to reset. The ball is live and both teams just flow back and forth nonstop. The game is two halves of 45 minutes with a halftime break of 15 minutes in between. And the clock counts up instead of down. The clock counts up instead of down. So when you're looking at the clock, it goes from one to 90, not from 90 to zero. Like when you're watching basketball and you're like, there's one minute left in the first half. Bitch, you just gotta do that math yourself when you're watching football, bitch. It's gonna say 89, and you're like, okay, yep, that's one minute away from 90. We got one minute left. But it gets even more confusing though, because it doesn't stop when the ball goes out or when a player goes down, kind of like in football, you reline up and everything stops when a player gets knocked down. The referee just keeps that lost time in his head and tacks a few extra minutes onto the end of each half to make up for it. So a 90-minute game really can run up to 95 or 100 minutes. So if you see the clock go past 90, that's why it's making up for lost time. Here is the most important thing to understand about the feel of the sport. Scoring is genuinely hard. Okay, you're trying to put a ball past 10 defenders and a goalie using your feet while everyone is exhausting, running around back and forth on that damn grass outside, okay? That is why the scores are so low. Two to one is a normal final score, okay? I know you're thinking it zero to zero can happen, and it isn't even rare. So there are games where nobody scores at all. So when a goal goes in, the whole stadium goes crazy. I know you've seen it before. Go, go, go, yeah, because that might be the only one all night. So it means everything to the audience, and that's the emotional core of the sport. The rarity is like the best part, not like basketball where buckets are constant, and when there isn't a bucket, you're kind of in a way because you're like, you should have hit that. No, you have to imagine if you're watching basketball and people might only put the ball in the hoop one time a game. Like you would go crazy if they did it. Now, let's talk. Switch in the positions for you. Positions! Woo! Yay! And you guys, you know, I keep it real simple here on Hoops for Hotties. I keep it real simple to where we can understand, you know what I'm saying? Just the basic knowledge that you need to know. We're not getting in all the details. If you got more knowledge, okay, if I'm not saying enough for you, please leave it in the comments for the girls and let them know. I just, you know, I'm giving you the basics. This is basically my crash course for what I wanted to know going into the World Cup, okay? There are four kinds of players and four jobs. You've got the forwards, aka the strikers. Exactly what it sounds like. These are the girls, the glamour girls, who get the headlines, right? Midfielders are the engine, okay? They are the engine. They are the runners, okay? They run the most and they set up the forwards. The forwards are the ones who typically are scoring, okay? The glitz and the glamour, okay? They get to duck, all right? Then you've got the defenders. They sit in the back and break up the other team's attack. So they're defending, you know, trying to make sure the other team can't score. Meanwhile, you've got the goalie, the goalkeeper, who is the last line of defense. She's the only one allowed to use her hands, or he, and the old and the one who gets blamed for everything, low-key. If they score, it's the go-it's the goalkeeper's fault. Mind you, there's a whole lot of defense in front of them. But yeah, so these are the four important types of positions you need to know. And I'm sure there are more specific names for each and every person on the field, but listen, this is this is only day one out here. Just to give you a refresher, okay? The forward, aka the striker, is the one scoring. They are typically in the front of the line, they are in the front lines. Then you've got the midfielders, they run the most. These are she's a runner, she's a track star, they run the most, you know, they run around, they're trying to set the forwards up, okay? They're trying to get assists, right? Then you've got the defenders, they're trying to keep the other team from scoring, right? And then the goalkeeper, the last line of defense. Okay, let's talk ref. Because I know y'all be seeing the activity up in soccer. You know, they be getting chippy, they be arguing, the girls be talking shit. You know what I'm saying? When a player fouls someone, this means they kick, shove, or trip an opponent. The referee can pull out a card. A yellow card is a warning, basically. This kind of means knock it off. This means, girl, chill, you fucking the program up, right? Whereas a red card means, girl, get the fuck off my lawn.

unknown 11:30

Get out!

SPEAKER_00 11:31

You get it, right? A yellow card is like, all right, you want the nice, and then and then a and a red card is like, get the fuck out of my house with that bullshit. You feel me? A red card means you're ejected from the game immediately, and your team is not allowed to replace you. I don't know how true that is. Listen, I gotta look, I gotta re-look that up and fact check that. What do you mean they're not allowed to? Yep. It's true. Mind you, I verified this yesterday because it sounded too too crazy to be true yesterday when I was doing my research, and I'm still gagged the fuck down by that. Oh my god. Okay. So if you get a red card, you get ejected. Your team is shit out of luck. That's one less person they have on their line of defense, right? Two yellows in one game add up to a red card. And a red card can wreck a team's entire night. And if a foul happens inside the goalie's box, which let me take you back. This is the goalies box. Y'all see that right there? This is her crib, this is her area. If you go inside there, you trespass, and if you go inside there, you foul. You know what I'm saying? If a foul happens inside of this goalie's box, the other team gets a penalty kick, which is a free one-on-one kick from close range against just the goalie. So basically it's a free throw, right? It's a shot you get to take, and no one gets to defend you, except for the goalie. So it's kind of harder than a free throw. It's basically a gifted goal, and it is terrifying for your team to watch if you're the one on the other end of it. Another thing I want to talk about when it comes to scoring are ties. Yes, ties can happen. Yes, a football game can end in a tie. In the first round of the World Cup, a tie is fine, it just ends in a tie. But in the later rounds, someone has to win. So a tie goes into 30 minutes of extra time, which might be like the longest overtime in sports. No? In football, it's like five minutes, in basketball, it's like five minutes. That's long. And if it's still tied after that, it goes to a penalty shootout. These are a bunch of one-on-one shots against the goalies, and it it decides some of the biggest games on earth. And I'm just telling you, and I know this, this is called PK's. I know this from high school. If it goes to PK's penalty kicks, it is the most nerve-wracking thing in all sports. I'm not even gonna lie. And I need that. I need to see all that, and I need to see all that in the World Cup. I need to turn penal uh PK's notification on my phone so I get notified if the game goes to PK's because that shit is invigorating. Everyone just lined up to kick the ball at the goalie one-on-one, bitch. Oh my god, and it decides the game. Oh my god. Now let's talk about what the World Cup actually is. The FIFA World Cup is the biggest sporting event on the entire planet. It's bigger than the Olympics, it's bigger than the Super Bowl, and it only happens once every four years, okay? It has 48 countries playing this year, which is the most ever. I believe there were just 32 last year. Yeah. North America is hosting, which means the matches are gonna take place in the biggest cities in the United States, Mexico City, and Canada. It brings in about $13 billion, and approximately 1.5 billion people watch the finals. Damn, bitch. How many people watch Super Bowl? You wanna compare? Let's compare. How many people watch Super Bowl? 110 million people watch the Super Bowl every year. 1.5 billion people are expected to tune in to watch the finals of the World Cup. Lock that in your brain, bitch. Wow. Okay, here comes our beauty pageant example. So I can help you understand how the World Cup actually flows, right? Also, it starts today. It literally starts today. So the first stage is the group stage. This is in our example what we're going to call first impressions, okay? All of the countries in the World Cup are split into 12 groups of four, okay? You can have, ooh, now I'm making a typo that says you do have to look better than the other three girls. In your group, you just have to do better than the other three teams to move on. Every team plays three games here, one against each of the others in the group. It's lower stakes, everyone's just kind of feeling each other out, making their first impression, and the best two teams from every group automatically advance. And on top of that, third place teams across all of the groups get a second chance, which brings it to 32 teams moving on. That sounds confusing. So let me do this the hoops for Hoddi's way, bitch. Okay. This is a beauty pageant. All of the countries are split into 12 groups of four girls, all competing against each other. So let's just imagine, I don't know what the actual groups are, but let's just imagine it's the USA, Spain, Mexico, and France. Okay. Miss USA, Miss Mexico, Miss France, and what's the other country I said? Spain. Are all just they're they're just going against each other right now. And this is just about first impressions. All you have to worry about is looking better than the other three girls in your group. Okay. And the two best girls get to move on. And some of the good enough girlies get a second shot to impress the judges. Simple enough. This is like the simple part where they're just seeing basically how pretty you are. Okay. Like how pretty are you? How do you look? I don't need to hear you talk. I don't need to let's just get down to business. How pretty are you? That's it. It's just a first impression. Nothing too serious. Next round is bum bum. The cuts, bitch. This is where shit starts getting sticky and serious. Then it flips completely into the knockout stage, which we are going to call the cuts. Now, if you lose, you go home live and in front of the entire planet. There are no more second chances, and you are not playing for yourself. You're playing for your whole country. So if you lose, it is a really big deal. In the cuts, you are live and in front of everyone, okay? And you are fighting for your beauty pageant bad bitch life. You're not just Sarah Jones anymore. You're Miss USA. So if you lose, the whole damn country is embarrassed and upset. The 32 teams that start out turn to 16. Those 16 teams turn to eight, and those eight turn to four, and the final two fight for the crown in front of two billion people. Now, the important thing to note about beauty pageants and our World Cup here is the prettiest girl doesn't always win, which basically means the most talented team isn't always gonna win. The team that we think is gonna win at the beginning isn't always gonna win because you lose one game in that knockout round during the cuts, bitch. You're out. Beauty is subjective, okay? You could practice perfectly and be the best bitch at pageanting and have the best walk and the best wave and the best hair and everything and still fall on your face on the day of the competition. One bad impression equals a trip home. Your favorite team is not always gonna win. Soccer is known for upsets. You can have one bad day and lose a game. The proof is in the last tournament, Morocco came out of nowhere as a massive underdog and made it all the way to the final four, knocking out giants along the way, and nobody saw them coming. Anybody can ruin anybody's night, and that's exactly what makes the World Cup a must-watch. It's kind of like March Madness in a much more global and adult kind of way. Now, part four. The part that I am the most excited about. Meet the contestants. What? Meet the contestants, bitch. Meet the contestants. It's Miss World Cup. Meet, meet, meet, meet, meet, meet the contestants. Disclaimer here. Okay. I am a bit well traveled, but I never intend to offend anybody or portray anybody incorrectly. I did a lot of research leading up to this. I come into this with the best intentions. This is simply to explain to the girlies, okay? I am using each team as a girl in our beauty pageant to introduce these countries to my audience. No harm is meant by it. Let's get into it. Also, I'm not gonna mention every single team that's in the World Cup. I'm just mentioning the ones that like are my must-mentions for now. But if you want me to do a separate video where I mention every single team, I can look into that. Okay, first and foremost, Miss Spain. Miss Espania. You did you hear me say Spain a little bit weird because I wanted to say Miss Espana, but I didn't want to get too ahead of myself and be weird, so I just called her Miss Spain because I don't know if we're on a like I say your name in Spanish first name basis yet, but I'm getting to know you, girl. So hello, Miss Spain. Your flag is Cunty. Yes. Miss Spain is kind of an it girl right now. She's the effortlessly cool one who controls every conversation and makes the whole room move at her pace, honey. I know that's right. The reason everyone is so high on her is a teenager who is considered one of the best young players on the earth and the future of the sport. Veterans are saying goodbye while this kid from Spain takes over. Welcome, Miss Spain, to the pageant. Yes. Next up, we have Miss Argentina. She is the reigning queen who wants her crown back. She won last time. Remember, the World Cup happens every four years, so not last year, last time in 2022. And she will not let you forget it. She's emotional, dramatic. She cries and screams. She's a ride or die for her people. And some of the girls got beef for her. I'm looking at you, Brazil. Listen, I heard from my Brazilian homegirl that Brazil and Argentina got beef. I don't know nothing about that. It's not my beef. I don't want to get too much into it. I'll look into it later, but apparently that's a thing there. Listen, people might find her a little insufferable because she's on top right now. This is where Messi plays. The star for Argentina is Messi. You know the one. You know the one. She's trying to win two World Cups in a row, which virtually never happens. Nobody has done it since the late 50s and early 60s. And the and the Knicks think they've got a long drought. Next, we have Miss Mexico. Yes! First of all, your flag girl eating down, eating down, eating the fuck down. This is so cute. Miss Mexico brings the best energy and the biggest crowd to every pageant. You know, her family and the crowd, and they're gonna be 30 deep and they're gonna be cheering for her. You know what I'm saying? When she walks across the stage of graduation, they are not saving their applause for the end. They are applauding as soon as they hear their girl's name. And I know that's right. Genuinely the life of the party, but always leaves at the exact same time and never makes it to the after party. She always dips it the same time. Everyone has high hopes for her. She's the most fun, she brings the best energy, but she just leaves at the same time every year, it seems. Because for years she has shown up and then got knocked out at the same early round, over and over, never quite making it to the after party. But this year she is hosting. So she's extra hyped, and the pressure to finally break the pattern is on. Looking forward to it, Miss Mexico. Wishing you the best, sister. Next, we have Miss England. Miss T and Crumpets, Miss England. My British accent isn't very good, is it? It's not very good, no. I have a very strong voice, so it's it's hard for me to do a British accent, really, but I'm still going to attempt to introduce Miss England in my British accent. No, I'm fucking not. That's so terrible, Mariah. I've watched too much Love Island for my British accent to be that bad. Miss England spends all year telling everyone this is finally her year, and then gets the whole room hyped. Then chokes at the worst possible moment on her fish and chips. Stop it. Like the British accent, it's so bad. Heartbreak happens right on schedule, and she hasn't actually won since 1966, and brings it up never. England basically invented the sport. So, so so my research said. This was probably written by a British person and has not won the World Cup since 1966. Damn. The Knicks think they got a bad shit. Damn. Damn. And moving on to the team that one of the brightest stars out of England, Lewis, Sir Lewis Hamilton, is rooting for. As am I. Bruh! Oh. Oh that I know that ain't my girl. I got a little ahead of myself. Okay. Um, Miss USA. For some reason, as an American, I feel much less patriotic about the World Cup than I do about the Olympics. Maybe because in the Olympics, we're we're the best at a lot of stuff, and I know we're gonna win, and I just know we're not the best at this. But Miss USA is the pretty girl who loves to host the whole party. But her style isn't quite up to par with the rest of the world yet. The girls in France, the girls in shit, the girls in Italy are outside the club and they still side-eyeing her. Like the girls from the other countries are looking at her like, oh, she's cute, but Miss USA girl, mm-mm, mm-mm. It's still not your Yuri girl. And she will probably be asleep before before everyone leaves her house. It's her party she's hosting, but everybody else is gonna be woo! Still dancing and singing, and she yeah, she'll be in bed. Hopefully not, but yeah, you know, I've got high hopes in in the women, you know what I'm saying? Because I'm using the men for these stereotypes, if it's not obvious. Uh we'll do we'll do the ladies on a different date. But next, Miss Brazil! Yes! I love Brazil. Uh no Gabriel from Love Island. Um, Brazil is the most decorated country in the history of the sport. And they know it, bitch. They take it very seriously. Boom, chuk, chap, boom, boom, chap, boom, boom, chap, boom, boom, chap, boom, boom, boom, chuk, chap, boom, boom, chuk. I know that's right, Brazil. She's the best dancer in the room. Naturally gorgeous. Body tea. But no, the body not tea, body caparinha. If you've been to Brazil, you know what the fuck I'm talking about. But body caipi, not tea. Because tea ain't strong enough. She's the best dancer in the room, but she messes up her routine on stage every year since 2002. Everybody waiting for Miss Brazil to get the stage. They know she's gonna give them boom, chom, ch-boom, chom, ch- And here she goes, slipping and falling. Again, damn, Miss Brazil! But everyone enjoys what while she's still standing, everyone enjoys it. You know? She's always expected to be iconic, but seems to be having an off night in recent years. Right now, she's rebuilding around a flashy young star who took over the spotlight from a previous big game. Next, Miss France. She's rich, she's gorgeous, she's got the most talent in the room, and she knows it. The only thing that ever stops her is her own team drama, which is always simmering. Like, imagine Zendaya, right? Because you know Zendaya, everything is always perfect about her. Her agent seems to have their shit together, her hairstylist seems to have her shit together, her stylist damn sure got his shit together. I know that's right, Law. Click, click, click, click, click, cock it. But imagine if Law couldn't get along with the hairstylist. Imagine they're doing the Challenger's Press tour, they've got her in these classy ass looks, the hairstylist got her in a bumpet and a messy ass look. The makeup artist got her doing Taylor Swift's cosplay every single day. The shit never matches. It's just clashing of cars. She may be a beautiful woman. It still is in there, right? But it's just the look isn't a winner. That's what this gives, right? If her own team drama gets in her way, she's fucked. Miss France won the World Miss World Cup in 2018 and was a runner-up in 2022, so she's always right there at the top. Her star is one of the fastest, most marketable players alive. And the only thing that ever trips her up is her own internal team drama, which always seems to be simmering. She could win the whole thing or combust from the inside. We never know because we've seen it all happen before. And I want to add this for Miss USA. Look, as the host, she gets an automatic spot, right? But the pressure is real. She's playing on her home soil with the whole country watching, but and she's our girl, so we ride for her. But she has improved a lot and is still not at the level of the international competition. Kind of like our school system. Now let's talk about one of the biggest storylines of this tournament. Two of the baddest on earth going head to head, or I guess both doing the World Cup for the last time, possibly. You've got Cristiano Ronaldo and Messi, who are both, I believe, in their 40s, right? They're both getting up there, right? So it's safe to assume that in four years they're not going to be playing football anymore, and this is probably the last time. Now, I don't want to get too much into the football goat debate because I already get enough shit for the American American basketball GOAT debate. And so I'm not even gonna get into this shit, but what I do know is Messi winning the World Cup definitely put him ahead in the GOAT debate for a lot of people, a lot of fans, and people are wondering if Cristiano Ronaldo, you know, could possibly win it, he could possibly do it. Would that put him up there in the argument as well? I don't fucking know. We've got two baddies going head to head for the very last time. Listen, the two players here are Messi and Ronaldo. They are the greatest of all time debate in soccer. For about 15 years, they were the two best players on the entire planet at the same time. So it caused a lot of people to argue who's the goat, who's the goat, who's the goat. They traded the sport's biggest individual award back and forth so many times, they have more than a dozen between them. Fans have argued nonstop about who's better for over a decade. And it's the defining sports argument of a generation. It's the LeBron versus Jordan of the football world, of literally the rest of the world. It's kind of like if LeBron and Michael Jordan were at the exact same level at the exact same time and everyone had to pick a side. This is almost certainly the last time we see either of these men in the World Cup. They're both taking their final bow at the same time. Messi already won the last World Cup in 2022. Meanwhile, a lot of people felt that really settled the argument in his favor. Ronaldo, despite being one of the most famous athletes who has ever lived, has never won it. So this is his last shot to get the one thing that his rival has that he does not. How'd I do, guys? How'd I do, football fans? Was that okay? Is that okay? Did I give this story the je ne sais quoi it deserves? God, I'm so nervous to see these comments. I'm not gonna read them. I'm not gonna read them. I'm going blind, bitch. I'm I'm sure I'm gouging both my eyes out with a fork. I'm not reading them. Okay, part six. And this was mainly for me. Again, this research was helping me prepare for the World Cup. If you guys don't like it, you can scroll. At least I learned a little something. I'm always curious, okay, who does everyone actually think could win? Right? Who are the teams that actually have a shot at winning? And these are the five teams that experts have as their favorites. These came in order from the ESPN Power Rankings, but I looked at a few sources to try to figure out who the main bitches were. And this is kind of what came up everywhere. Spain is the number one ranked team with the young phenomena, and then Argentina as well, because she, well, she's not second, but Argentina as well because she has the defending crown. Then you've got France because she has the most talent and a recent title. England, because she's always hyped, even though it kind of always ends in heartbreak. And Brazil, because she has won more than anyone else in history. But again, the prettiest girl doesn't always win the beauty pageant. If her question answers fucking suck, she's gonna lose. So this isn't always guaranteed. Lastly, as with all of my hoops for Hotdy's videos, I want to give you some lingo so that when you're watching, you can sound like you've been watching football for years. Okay, so we are not calling this game soccer anymore from this day forward. It is football. When I refer to football, listen, it's not fall. Patrick Mahomes isn't suiting up, the Falcons aren't fucking playing. This is the only football on right now. International football, we what we call football is American football. Okay, what we call soccer, the rest is the world-class football. So throughout the World Cup, North America, don't embarrass me. We are calling it football. Next is pitch. Pitch is just the field. Yeah. Match is just the game. Okay. Say match. Are you catching the match tonight? Not the game. The kit is just the uniform. And in our beauty pageant example, it's their dresses, okay? Their jerseys, whatever. A soccer kit, have you ever heard that? A football kit, or I should say, I just corrected y'all on that. That's the uniform. A cap is one game played for your country. A hundred caps is someone who's been around forever. A cap in this case is not a lie, or something you wear when you graduate. I love that for us. A clean sheet means no one scored on your goalie, bitch. It basically a clean sheet is kind of like a bunch of bitches hit on your man when she when he was out without you, but he didn't embarrass you not one time. That's a clean sheet. I know that's right. That's also known as a shutout. Then you've got a brace, which is two goals, or a hat trick, which is three goals. I don't know how to use that in a sentence. Like she had a hat trick last night. Does that mean she had three goals? Or our team had a hat trick. Our team had a brace. I don't know. Someone comment in the comments how to use that in a sentence. Help me out. I don't want to be sounding stupid all World Cup long, okay? The group of death. That's the little group that's stacked with too many good teams. So remember earlier when I introduced you to the fact that we have first impressions and all countries are split into 12 groups of four. Those are your groups. Well, there's always a group that's like really fucking hard and has like all the teams in it. Like if a group had Spain, France, Argentina, and England in it, that's a group of death because that everyone's kind of fucked in that dynamic, no? Then you've got offsides, which I have come to realize. And listen, I asked you guys, do you have any questions about the World Cup? Y'all asked me some deep dark shit. I was like, holy shit, y'all, it's my first day out here. This is a rule that nobody actually understands, and even the refs act argue about it. Again, help us out in the comments. What the sh what does this mean? I even looked it up and I didn't even understand the definition. So if you hear offsides, I I honestly just don't think we need to know this yet. I think that we'll learn it throughout the tournament. Hopefully, you guys enjoyed this and I helped you learn a thing or two about football. Again, I'm still learning, so I hope that this was fun for you guys. And if you enjoyed this, please make sure to subscribe to Oops for Hotties on YouTube for more football slash soccer content. And if you want to learn about the NBA Finals, the NFL, whatever, I teach it all. Make sure to subscribe to me on YouTube as well as listen to this on audio, on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, wherever you get your podcasts, I throw it up there. If you want to listen while you're driving to work or whatever, leave me a five-star review. It helps me keep the lights on in this bitch. And make sure to follow Hoops for Hotties on TikTok and Instagram to keep up with what I'm going to be doing next and to DM me, leave me a comment, let me know what you want me to talk about next. I hope you enjoyed this video. This was new for me. So thank you so much for getting to the end of it. And I love you. Mean it.

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Bye.