Infinite Nerd Theorem

Morkborg's Descent: Fortune's Favor and Fateful Encounters Amidst the Dying Lands

February 19, 2024 INT podcast team Season 1 Episode 3
Infinite Nerd Theorem
Morkborg's Descent: Fortune's Favor and Fateful Encounters Amidst the Dying Lands
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Ever had one of those days when everything seemed to go your way? Well, that's exactly what happened to Eric in our latest escapade as we navigated through frostbitten paths and crumbled roads, with fate gracing us with a lucky roll of 16. Let's just say, even Reinhold's famed 'shitlist' couldn't dampen the spirits of our merry band. We tackled the primal challenge of dwindling rations head-on, splitting ranks to hunt and forage in the wild aftermath of a battlefield. As we recount the tension of silent encounters with feral horses and the warmth of camaraderie, you'll find yourself caught up in the raw thrill of survival that leaves us toggling between feasting and famine.

Have you ever felt the weight of a decision as if it might hold the power to alter your very soul? Eggerton felt that pressure when he bound himself to a mysterious book, only to have it unveil itself as Cathan, the prince of doom. Negotiations with the otherworldly have never been so intense, with souls and knowledge hanging in the balance. Follow along as we tangle with eerie merchant encounters, confrontations on the road, and the audacious stand against the King's soldiers. It's not just about the choices we make; it's about the cursed artifacts we dance with and the looming presence of Galganbeck city, teasing us with its secrets.

The final leg of our journey is nothing short of a roller coaster through the deceptive comforts of Morkborg. Picture this: a lavish meal, the allure of a land claim, and the mysterious survival of Dr. Steen waiting to unsettle our sleep. With each member of our motley crew bringing their unique quirks to the table, we set the stage for a confrontation that promises to be as unpredictable as it is inevitable. So, buckle up, dear listeners, as we prepare to face the strange citizens of Schleshwig and unravel the untold destinies that beckon to us from the depths of our dreams.

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Speaker 1:

Eric is laughing right now. Eric is laughing out loud. Yeah, yeah, that's what happens when you're always the butt of the joke. Now I made y'all the butt of the joke. My next joke. How's it? Feel you crappy jester?

Speaker 3:

So Tingle looks and goes yeah, yeah, yeah. You know you may have gotten me, but just remember you also got Reinhold too dumbass as Tingle goes, knocked out. Oh, and Reinhold just locks a fucking death glare at fucking Eric as he digs his fingers into the ground.

Speaker 1:

This big guy. You were the one that wanted to eat it. I didn't offer it to you. You just ate it and then you ate Navas portion. Don't even try to cop out your wife bitch.

Speaker 3:

So this is all Reinhold does is? He stands up, slowly, approaches Eric. Now Eric, how tall? I mean Finner. How tall is Eric? He's about six four. Okay, so he's not that much shorter than Reinhold, because Reinhold is seven feet tall and he weighs 400 pounds. So he looks Eric in the eye and he just goes. You just made my shitless. There's only one other man on that list right now, and that's the shadow king, think about that. And Reinhold goes to sleep. He just like plants down, like he literally just plops down full strength, and when he does, he lays down with his fists up against his head, Still just laying there looking at Eric. Oh, and Reinhold sleeps with his eyes open. So you just hear this, as his eyes are just still open.

Speaker 1:

Oh he looked so sweet and normal when he's asleep, but underneath all that, all that cuteness, is a big, giant grizzly bear that wants to rip me to shreds.

Speaker 2:

No, oh yeah, you're absolutely going to die now.

Speaker 3:

And then, just to add the pure horror of the situation, this is literally a little Nikki moment because just as Reinhold snoring, you just hear a like you know child voice. Back to just eyes open, staring at Eric.

Speaker 4:

I went off to get a Gatorade for tingle.

Speaker 3:

All right, but but all right, anything else anyone would like to do. So I'm not going to make Kat do this another two times because I think, even if someone had like to take their saying for five days, you're only going to do it once. The other, the rest of the travel time freebie. It's just this, the first part of the travel, the events. So the last thing Kat is going to do for her portion is she's going to roll me a D12. One more time, because the first option is crackling frost. Okay, so the bad news is both of these are really shitty weather because it's hammering rain. So, but if you choose crackling frost, it'll just take away the advantage, but if you pick number two, it's going to make us have disadvantage in all the role.

Speaker 5:

Yeah, I was going to think crackling frost anyways.

Speaker 3:

Okay, so just the advantage is gone. So now it's just first roll. We got to take what happens, so now it's a little serious. So now I'm going to roll a D6. One to two, nova, three to four Argris. Five to six Egerton, brian holds going to go last automatically, it's, I'm not, it's. I will automatically go last. So, all righty, I'm rolling the D6 now. Yeah, what about me? Yeah, I'm over here too. Well, how is that fucking? For irony, because it's Eric who was going. Because, remember, I said one, two, nova, three to four, eric, and then five to six Argris. So, eric, you are actually in charge of travel for this one.

Speaker 3:

So your first roll during this time of travel is we need to see how the roads are for as we head out. So first roll. I actually know, because there is no more two rolls. So roll me a D8. I rolled a five. Good, sir, Gee, okay. Oh, my God, that is whoo. My heart was beating a little fast. By the grace of God we have gotten once well maintained trade road fallen into disrepair. We're not going to run into any monsters or creatures or animals, so pretty quiet as we start off our journey into the next, into basically what's going to be almost half of our journey done. Now, roll me a D20. Finner D20 says 16. Okay, so, as group, as we're going, oh, we'll do that after this event. We can actually do that after the event, because that was going to offer, because I was going to actually say if anyone, if they don't want to cook, do hunting. So, because we actually all need food, all of our rations are pretty much done, because it's been four days travel, yeah, so we all actually have to hunt.

Speaker 3:

So otherwise, yeah, Eric gets a KG and so as we're going, walking down the road, across the road there's literally a battle between a flayed cultist band and an earthbound pack. It's just good, Brutal thing. You see a morning star smash and one of the flayed cultist members head in. Oh, pretty brutal Right Right Now because Ryan, because Nava and Ryan Holder actually can actually partake in cannibalism and they do eat. I will offer the two of them the chance to maybe get their days rationed if they want to potentially use agility to sneak their ass on the battlefield and grab some of that meat. But it is going to be a DR 14 difficulty roll.

Speaker 4:

AG is willing to go borrow people meat for them if Ryan Holder is willing to share, then I can use one of my elements to help reduce the difficulty.

Speaker 6:

Oh, ag already reduced the difficulty of agility. Rolls Sweet and he's fine with the idea. All right, well, he just doesn't do it himself.

Speaker 3:

AG. Go ahead, Give me well, because I already said it's going to be a DR 14, but we all know DR numbers are different for you with agility. So give me what it will be after you lower it.

Speaker 6:

I think it's 12 after I lower it, although is that modified at all by the fact that I'm invisible? Oh wait, I can't be invisible.

Speaker 3:

Just a minute. You don't even have to flip and roll.

Speaker 6:

No, I can't be invisible.

Speaker 3:

Because there's no one dead.

Speaker 6:

If there's no one dead, then how am I getting dead people meat?

Speaker 3:

No, no, no, because they're just dying from the battle.

Speaker 6:

Oh, so I'm just borrowing living meat.

Speaker 3:

Yes, so roll me a D6 real quick, roll me a D6.

Speaker 6:

Copy that I got meat, I got five.

Speaker 3:

You bring back five pounds of meat. That is more than enough for Nava and Reinhold to satiate for their rash today. Wow Okay, fuck shit, I forgot about that blindfold. That was badass, all right, well, um. So here's everyone's options. Who ever would like to go foraging. If you want to go, there's an option you can either go foraging or you can go hunting.

Speaker 5:

I would like to do foraging.

Speaker 3:

Okay. So I just want to find out what everyone would like to do, because I'm going to break off the two different groups, the foraging groups and then the hunting party. I'm going to go hunt. Okay, so, one hunt, one forage.

Speaker 6:

I'd go foraging.

Speaker 3:

So two forage, two hunt. Reinhold is going to go hunt, so that's three. Argrics wants to hunt, so that's four hunting, two foraging. That's actually pretty good. So Egerton and Poulta are both going to roll a D6.

Speaker 6:

Two for Egerton.

Speaker 3:

Three for me, two guys' look is stupid. So first I'm going to give Egerton this Um, ergene, roll me a D6 real quick.

Speaker 6:

Well, that one isn't good, that's a one.

Speaker 3:

Okay, now roll me a DR12.

Speaker 6:

That is another crit there, sir.

Speaker 3:

Okay, you definitely. So you noticed that one of the rations is spoiled, so you get one day's worth of ration instead of two, because one of them was going to spoil in like the next hour.

Speaker 6:

I mean he's still probably keep it.

Speaker 3:

Okay, you know what I'm going to. Let you keep that, because you've been like this. It wouldn't. It won't make you sick. So you get two days worth of ration and Poulta, roll me a D6. Okay.

Speaker 5:

That's a four.

Speaker 3:

You got seven days worth of rations. Yeah, you guys landed on the two things for foraging. That's ration, uh-huh Just one D6.

Speaker 5:

She's going to look at an Aes that looks like it's about to turn. She's going to nod like Mother doesn't like picky eaters. Nah.

Speaker 3:

Alrighty.

Speaker 6:

Yeah, I'm always going to do that too.

Speaker 3:

Alrighty. So now, since we're in Tivlin, now we're going to the hunting party. First things first, I'm going to see what game we're hunting Shit, okay, okay, time to find out how many there are. As we're going through the treat, through the forest, we've been, uh, four, four of them have been going a while. That's when we hear them. They can, we can hear them, as we know exactly what animals game this is.

Speaker 3:

Ryan holds laughs loudly as he especially remembers this, because you can hear the screams of first, yeah, as we come upon, two feral horses feeding on a couple. Now, let me see, now, let me roll real quick. They don't react to our presence yet, they're just feeding. It says if they're indifferent, all right guys. So here we go. And since they're, um, indifferent and they're not attacking, we all get a free attack. So another nice news oh, attacking is string. So for you, cause it's sort of the D six we're going to roll. Oh, wow, we just have to beat that, okay. So when you're rolling to attack, you just want to beat eight, and that's going to be. It's a, so it's. You want it's a difficulty roll of eight, so that's a, and that's plus your, uh, string. So, now that you're attacked, rolling 11, you literally stab it in the ass and it takes one damage.

Speaker 2:

I was going to say I use a crossbow and shoot a guy's out.

Speaker 3:

All right, you do okay. Actually, I liked that thousand times better. You shoot a bolt, but it still only does one damage. But you do take one of its eyes, this is like, but they still don't understand where the attacks coming from.

Speaker 2:

Argrics, and then we'll see the next one, hopefully.

Speaker 3:

Yes, you have a free attack. Give me a. Give me a strength roll with a difficulty roll of eight.

Speaker 4:

Okay, so my strength is negative three. My roll was five.

Speaker 3:

Oh, no, okay. I'll burn an omen, We'll just okay Go ahead, re-roll that bad boy.

Speaker 4:

Thank you, same thing, five. You said re-roll. You said earlier that same number is re-roll, correct. Yeah, was that just for traveling?

Speaker 3:

Oh, I didn't know that was for traveling. For advantage when you, when you're rolling the outcome, so you rolled another five. Dammit, yeah, no, yeah, you're fired and you're missed.

Speaker 6:

Can I roll an omen or give an omen if I'm not there?

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 6:

Cause I have multiple omens and only half of them get used at a time. Yeah, cause you roll it and flip a coin I got. I got one in two coins. Which which side is good? Oh, lost the damn coin.

Speaker 3:

So we'll say this time for the 50% chance is heads use, tails not use.

Speaker 6:

Heads.

Speaker 3:

All right Time, one omen is used, all right, so go ahead and re-roll again. Argers.

Speaker 6:

Try to get better than a five.

Speaker 4:

Yeah, about that. Okay, you're, you're, you're not, you're not. Three fives, you're not three fives.

Speaker 6:

Yeah, you rolled a.

Speaker 4:

I rolled a third five Yatsy. Okay, all right, so can I use an omen? Yes, you may. We are starving.

Speaker 6:

I have one there, omen.

Speaker 4:

Okay, uh, so could I use one to lower the difficulty rating minus four? Would that help?

Speaker 3:

Oh, yeah, you can lower it to four.

Speaker 4:

Okay, so am I just rolling a four sided dino?

Speaker 3:

No, you're still rolling a d20.

Speaker 4:

Oh a d20.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, you're supposed to be rolling a d20.

Speaker 6:

Uh, if you would like to throw it in the back, yeah, I want to know, have you not been rolling a d20 this whole time?

Speaker 4:

No, I heard d8, so I was rolling a d20.

Speaker 3:

Okay, Roll. No, it's a d20 against a difficulty roll of three fives.

Speaker 5:

That would be a sin, okay.

Speaker 1:

Yeah let's make sure so roll a d20.

Speaker 3:

This is done, so everyone rewind first. Roll roll a d20.

Speaker 4:

Okay, are you kidding me? A fourth five in a row.

Speaker 3:

Okay, now use the first omen roll, okay taking this one.

Speaker 4:

Okay, five again. I can't make this up. I got another five, five fives in a row.

Speaker 1:

All right.

Speaker 6:

Now use the second omen roll at a certain point you got to say probability is just against you my goodness. Are you throwing in the dial Like? Are you just dropping it? What's happening here?

Speaker 4:

I'm using dice roller on giggle. All right, you know what? Give me one second, I'm gonna get actual dice.

Speaker 5:

All right.

Speaker 4:

I need like one minute because it's like I think if I roll one more five I will literally break the spacetime continuum.

Speaker 3:

Oh, god Okay while we wait for our ricks to reroll um, during this time, reinhold just just like feeling for his ever friendly compadres, even though he has enough meat for himself. He's just, he's hungry to do some good damage, to rip and tear until it's done. Hey, Reinhold rolled an 18.

Speaker 4:

I'm a moron. I was rolling the. Oh my goodness, I thought that looked weird. I was rolling the drunk freaking die there. Okay, all right, I got the actual d20 now, all right, holy shit, it is a 20.

Speaker 3:

Okay, okay, oh my goodness, roll your weapons damage and that is going to be double.

Speaker 1:

So can we get our omen back.

Speaker 6:

Uh, you, you still spent yours. One of mine is still spent, uh, but my other one didn't get spent.

Speaker 3:

We're gonna be nice and we're just gonna not count your omens being spent, since he um.

Speaker 6:

Unless he still hasn't figured out his well he may not have seen about his situation.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, so we're just gonna yeah, we're gonna count that as the one roll, so roll your damage, damage.

Speaker 4:

All right, I gotta see what I got. A roll for a warhammer. I forgot to put that down on my character Six. I have what's that?

Speaker 3:

d6, d6.

Speaker 6:

Yeah, most of them are six, unless it's uh. What do they call the? Uh, this white-handed?

Speaker 3:

Okay four Okay, you land, and that is actually times two. So you take out one of the feral horses. How do you do it?

Speaker 4:

Okay, so I'm gonna jump off of tingle shoulders into the air with my warhammer and I'm gonna shout Go right for the neck but, I missed the neck. I go right for the skull and its eyes pop out and its teeth, just like shadow, roll over the place. Brain matter all over the place, but it's dead and and and at that moment Reinhold, because I rolled Reinhold attack.

Speaker 3:

I like I said I rolled an 18 and rolled his damage, I rolled a nine feral horses, hp is only an eight. So Reinhold, he like, he looks like, he's kind of like, looks like he's trying to stretch his back, but then he jumps in the air and he starts to bend and I mean like stupidly fast, and when he hits the ground and as he's spinning he swings, he's mighty femur and knocks the feral horses head off and it splatters against the tree. You just hear a and Reinhold looks at you guys and goes I'm finished. And With this, because the hunting mechanic, the way it works, is you get so many pounds of meat for how much health?

Speaker 3:

The Game half, and we killed two feral horses and they each have eight hp. So that's 16 pounds of meat. You gotta tell everybody To be fair. I think that would be a lease for everyone. Well, between Argyrix and Argyrix and Eric will say between the two of you and including eggerton, I'll be nice and say that'll give you guys four days worth of ration, enough to get us to the next person's turn.

Speaker 4:

Okay can I do one thing or a pass?

Speaker 3:

Yeah, it's bedtime. Now it's we're camp. Yeah, because the only other thing that's going to happen is just give me one second, because I just have to have Fennel. All right, roll me a d12 real quick me.

Speaker 1:

No, no, finner, I got a 10, sir, now roll me a d6, you got a four.

Speaker 3:

Oh no, what. You'll find out what this is later. Oh no, no, no, he was just rolling about. What's gonna happen during, you'll find out later. So this is just for later. So anyway, so go ahead, guys. It's nighttime, um ryan hole. Ryan hole is just um. Honestly, he's just sitting there and listening to tingle tingle see sing, sing some songs that he's learned from the, from the castles. During the times times, argyrix's family had visited to the shadow kings and well, they didn't really see the shadow king. They were just like even though they're royalty, the shadow king doesn't give a shit. Everyone is beneath him. So what's everyone else doing at this time?

Speaker 1:

Well, uh yeah, it's been 72 hours and Eric hasn't had any fresh meat in 72 hours. Oh no, you got fresh meat. So you just see, just go to like a very dark corner and just start eating like an animal. Dr Satan's book.

Speaker 3:

Nava, I'm going to have you roll a dr 16. Rule presents damn Nothing bad happens, just the pages. It book is listening to you, but at the same time he's just. It's like he's being a being, a troubled teen, like I'm not listening to you, mom.

Speaker 2:

Okay, buck, let's cut to the chase. What do I have to do for you to open up to me?

Speaker 3:

Hey, this is now. This is going to be one. Actually, this is a freebie book. Oh, you're about to say, be I was just gonna throw in.

Speaker 6:

Even the books are angsty.

Speaker 3:

So book, it's eye locks on and as you're looking on, it starts to spin, spinning, spinning, spinning, until you're not seeing the book anymore. You're seeing a miss and all you see is what looks like it's just the shape of a hand and then blood coming from the hand and what looks like a page of a book in the hand Putting its bloody hand on there, but then instead of the handprint, you know, the blood appearing on the page is as if the page is absorbing, but then, instead of there being, and then just like what looks like words burning, like all of a sudden, as if they're being burned into the grave like a name. Now the question is, can you decipher? So now that's what the books, your everything starts to come back to normal and books, I stop spinning.

Speaker 2:

I don't want to do my best to decipher it, we'll come back to you now.

Speaker 3:

We'll give you another day's travel and we'll see what you come to in the next, the next camp of it. Now, it would anybody else like to do anything before it's time to retire, before everyone's tired.

Speaker 6:

Well, I had a quick question. Yes, uh, she explained to us that the book said uh, words and names have power, right, yep? So, uh, agarton would like to show up and and talk to nava and say, nava, yes, eggy thinks it's important, but you should know this. Come on, agarton.

Speaker 3:

And then he just leaves bookie the book, the book that opens like opens shuts, happily.

Speaker 2:

Okay.

Speaker 3:

You see like like it's hungrily Lapping after agarton, after hearing a name and like and like the book is like trying to follow after.

Speaker 2:

I let the book go.

Speaker 3:

Let them follow, eggy the book as if it's like flying flapping. It drops in front of egg agarton's feet. Agarton, you see a blank page on the book.

Speaker 6:

He is going to happily write the name agarton in the book.

Speaker 3:

The book is trembling, as if, as if it's still missing a step.

Speaker 3:

I write agarton and I put my hand on the pages, but I also do it with my blood and with this, when you put your bloody hand, the, you hear what sounds like as if the book is the pages. The book is literally eating the blood, sucking it down and with that, you see, like the name you wrote down is becoming burned Engraved to the book. Agarton, you see a shit ton of text in the book now, and we're, we're, and we're nava looks, she sees blank pages. Agarton, you see, you see words. Hey boss, I, hey boss, the book is talking to you oh great.

Speaker 3:

Hey boss, actually, here's the now. Here's the funny part. You actually can hear the talking now. So, uh, who's the one that? Uh, so this is kind of weird. Only one of you should be able to hear me. Who did the blood contract?

Speaker 2:

who cheated? I did the blood contract cheater, cheater cheater, dirty cheater.

Speaker 3:

He was supposed to do the blood contract.

Speaker 2:

Okay, why did dr Sayden give me the fucking book?

Speaker 3:

because you were supposed to make the contract I made, but now you cheated because I was supposed to be able to eat your soul. Now you cheated. Now I can't eat anyone's soul. How dare you? The last trap dr Sayden place for you. You defeated. I hate you. Think you're smarter than me.

Speaker 2:

I grab the book.

Speaker 3:

Wait, wait, hold on. I have one and very important detail to add before you destroy it.

Speaker 2:

I want you to know. Let me finish, I grab the book and I walk to the campground. Do you want to really change your tone with me?

Speaker 1:

I am cathan the prince doom.

Speaker 3:

I'm the prince of the doom dimension keep going.

Speaker 2:

So now I'm getting your interest.

Speaker 3:

You've heard of me? Hmm, I hear most things. You know who my mother is, who your world serves, who is the one that blessed dr Sayden the knowledge forbidden? Bow before sub necker, necker off. I cathan, the prince of the doom dimension. You hold just a piece to speak to me. That book is my flesh, those pages, my very teeth. I am cathan, prince of the doom dimension. Just a piece. I am cathan.

Speaker 6:

I make you.

Speaker 3:

I like you so much, so, like I said, you cheated dirty, dirty, dirty theater. I was supposed to get yourself Life for a life. That's the cost.

Speaker 6:

Hold on, hold on. Eggy would like to also offer a bit of a compromise and says I have backups if you need, and he opens another pouch with jars that say souls. Don't ask where I got them borrowed the book book.

Speaker 3:

Well, I no longer need to call them book, I can just call them cut on, cut on. Quakes in your head.

Speaker 2:

Oh I.

Speaker 6:

Should clarify. He doesn't know if they are in fact souls. He was traded them by another Person who said that they were souls.

Speaker 3:

So here's the funny thing be this is I will let you know right now. Those are most definitely souls.

Speaker 6:

Then he is happy to part with them. For you see, you see, yeah, why?

Speaker 3:

names have you? Let me have those secret names you. The book is literally Drilling. You see drool leaking from the book.

Speaker 2:

I was a little irritated, sweetheart, if you was hungry or you had something. Look at those plump they're like he's willing.

Speaker 6:

Iggy's willing to get away his borrowed souls. But Iggy would like you to teach his friend. Oh hey, iggy's friend is now.

Speaker 3:

Hold the bottle to the book, hold the bottle to the book and I will tell you don't even open.

Speaker 6:

He doesn't want to do that. He gives it to Navarra smart.

Speaker 2:

I'm gonna keep it out of reach. Tell me what you know false.

Speaker 3:

Ah, the reason why we beings that walk beyond the veil, the reason why Names have power, it's because your name, your soul, is your name, the soul is the name, the name is the soul. So when you invoke, your name is invoked, so so we get a taste. We get a taste that Deliciousness of that. So everything just also is one of the most delicious, most sweet Souls have a taste probably because they use a good boy.

Speaker 2:

I'm katharne prison and I'm not a Iggy's friend. So, katharne, how many about the rip?

Speaker 6:

fiction difficulties.

Speaker 3:

Oh, you wish to know the page that came from sub-nicaraght. I do give I'm going to have you roll the DR 14, ryan hold will do his because we're going into a new day and Everyone. I'm actually gonna have you roll to read and everyone, because it's been so many days. Everyone's um omens will be replenishing in the morning. Okay, so I, so you get a re-roll for this. That no, so with then in case anyone can tell, a novel rolled a 12. So with her plus. So, yes, that knows that big on how to treat, not undead does that include the soul?

Speaker 3:

Yes, and how to invoke the, to bring back the name, to invoke the soul back into. That is why the I was given to you, because the price was life. That is your hint.

Speaker 2:

Ah, so the doctor cannot create action but trade one for a different. But don't you want these delicious Juicy souls, you fiends? I jiggle those job.

Speaker 3:

It's Polter, I need you to roll. This is a DR 16 presents. Okay, I got sixteen so this was the one time wanted biggest Polter Wait a minute oh hi, this is the one time not this time, cuz put you speak.

Speaker 3:

I'm not gonna put words in your mouth for what you say, because you finally can't hold it. In that book, that was her book. That was her book. That was the book of that bitch who brought the strange citizens down upon the Valley of the un of the unfortunate done. That was Dr Steen's book. That was more gonna Bear kins, mother, fucking book as you speak. And that's when the books eyes Shoot open, like as the eyes about to split, as it just goes. No, not one One. Eggerton Nava agility rolls DR 12s as the book burst into a black flame. Holy shit, nava roll the D Crit success. I want you to paint what you do, but first be 19.

Speaker 3:

Okay, nava, what do you do?

Speaker 2:

Fuckin. I get the fuck out of the eggerton for the fire, by the way.

Speaker 6:

I think I was muted. I said I immediately go invisible and then get the fuck out of there as well.

Speaker 3:

And as a gargantuan black pillar erupts, the only person who really sees as Bloody tears goes down Poltas face as you see her Standing there in the flesh, morgana bearkin, formerly the former Morgana bear, now known as dr Steen. As she looks at you as the, as the Pitan, the book just continues screaming Polta, what is this last? What do you? What is the one thing you do? As she just burned, her raging, fury, bloody gaze Locks on to you and one other.

Speaker 5:

She's gonna open her own book.

Speaker 3:

Oh, keep going, I'm gonna let you. This is a this, this scene is it's. It's too good just to end at a simple thing Go ahead.

Speaker 5:

So margona needs to make a dr 12 test to prevent this from happening.

Speaker 3:

I'm letting I'm dr 12. Yeah, it happens. Just go ahead, because I have something that's actually gonna happen to her where she is.

Speaker 5:

Okay, well, I need a coin. Two berserker slayers appear from the depths of the forgotten dimension of blood. Uh and uh. They fight alongside me because I rolled a three and not a five or six.

Speaker 3:

They're gonna stay with. So how long do they stay with you? It? Does not say um, so I'm going to let them stay for the rest of the session then.

Speaker 5:

Yeah, it's once a day, rather, uh, but so it doesn't say how long they last.

Speaker 3:

Okay, so thankfully, cuz. So oh, I just, I fucking see these two big ass berserkers. Now margona is really not there, but what happens? Because she rolled a nat one, so she's gonna be experiencing an arcane catastrophe. Oh, no, hold on. Oh, my god, um the earth, she got a six. The earth decays around you like wet flesh. You sink three feet and can't climb out without help, plinging to you screaming and biting our d4 translucent cray, like Crayfish, like children, with your face. So that's with um poltas face, and she's going to be experiencing that for the next three days. Good job. And the end, the last thing that happens, as Outside of this, everything calms down. The berserkers are just standing guard as everyone goes to sleep, and during your sleep, you all have a dream. This is what you see beep beep, beep, beep.

Speaker 3:

The patients aren't waking up. Beep, beep, beep. We've tried resuscitation, they don't respond. Beep, beep. It's as if they will never have a future. All around you just see a very sterile hospital and you see Versions of yourselves that will never see a future over over. And you all wake up screaming oh shetty Reinhold's just in a, in a fetal position on the ground, just shaking back and forth.

Speaker 4:

Is tango screaming because of this, or is he screaming because he's the still cursed?

Speaker 3:

um, tingle, um. He's literally lost his voice, he. So he has like a little chalkboard now and he looks at all of you and he's just written the word.

Speaker 4:

I am bitter that he can't talk and agitated that I'm out of cough syrup. Also, I made a um last night, uh, with some of the horse here I made a wig for potha's mom.

Speaker 2:

I'm okay with this of why you and tingle are doing.

Speaker 4:

Wait, you, you guys don't, you don't um spoon with your gestures for warmth.

Speaker 2:

I mean, I don't have a gestal, but Anyway, we're all screaming.

Speaker 1:

Why is everybody screaming? I'm trying to sleep.

Speaker 3:

Wait, I think that's just like the group collectively just looks at Eric and just wonder the things that go on in that head.

Speaker 1:

Oh, the things that go in my head would even make you cry.

Speaker 4:

Reinhold, we just see a mill carton tip over in your head.

Speaker 3:

You know, no, it's not even. It's like I wish it was that. It's just that damn chime monkey Ching, ching, ching, ching, and except it's falling over on the side, so it's just In Reinhold. And then also you just hear the Do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do do, do, do, do do do, do, do. But this is going magnificent, and so I'm going to roll D6 one, three, now four through six Eggie Nova.

Speaker 2:

I call it three.

Speaker 3:

Alrighty. Oh, and so, miss Nava, we are doing our traveling, so let's see how the roads are. So, first things first, we roll a D8. We roll a six. You roll a six. You get a nice paved road, sporadically patrolled by the King's soldiers. Ah, it's a disaster. Disasters that don't look so tough. Thankfully, I'm over here. On this side of the road, they are making sure to put plenty of space between you guys. Yeah, fuck you. Fuck you, nava. Excuse you, yeah, and fuck you all grigs.

Speaker 2:

Hang on, I'm gonna jump off this wagon and beat the shit out of this guy.

Speaker 1:

Now Eric is out, y'all, eric is already out.

Speaker 2:

I stopped beating this shit out of him. I'm choking, I'm slapping him.

Speaker 3:

So everyone who jumps off the wagon, you're all gonna roll a D8. Yes, eight. Nava beats the shit out of eight soldiers.

Speaker 2:

And I take everything, including the underworld.

Speaker 3:

Reinhold eats eight people.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I got an eight as well. Eric beats a shit out of eight cards Argrics.

Speaker 4:

Okay, do you mean? Do you mean a d20?

Speaker 3:

No, no, no a d8.

Speaker 4:

Okay, just making sure I'm getting like dicey.

Speaker 1:

Just how many guards you hit. Hold on the thing that you rolled five on three times. I thought it was the d20.

Speaker 2:

Oh, real fast. I also cut off all the God's Disaster Chakes.

Speaker 3:

Reinhold is the best meat in the room.

Speaker 2:

Exactly. I'm talking this into Jockey Lair, though.

Speaker 4:

Okay, so many guards, and I bet one of these guards were once like us before I put on air around one of their knees.

Speaker 1:

For a feature again.

Speaker 3:

And before even the drum, and before the little broom can go off, reinhold swallows that guard and goes no none of that.

Speaker 1:

No, we are just like these. And Eric just holds up a guy who's knocked and he just knocked out and just goes. Not like these, they're just dumb, they're just stupid, because all they think is oh, adventure, riches and gold. I get away from my parents farmland, yada, yada, yada. Nobody fucking cares. I fucking hold by, ah.

Speaker 3:

And I bet Bill had never thought he'd be delicious. Thanks, guys.

Speaker 1:

Reinhold, reinhold, we need to set up a little bit of a boundary. You can't, you can eat people. Just Make sure you eat away from me, because that's kind of disturbing there.

Speaker 2:

Bud, and now since, I took literally everything, included the underworld, from the guards. Do I get any goodies?

Speaker 3:

Hold on 100 silver Combined from all the guards. That's everybody and honestly, you got better weapons than they would have ever had.

Speaker 2:

The only thing of worth was the silver. You were angry from the useless weapons. I stopped being the gods again, even though I'm conscious.

Speaker 1:

No, you're bruising the rhymes. Eric just goes up behind them and they're up over his shoulder. Come on, do not touch me.

Speaker 2:

Do not fucking touch me.

Speaker 4:

There's one thing I'd like to do before we leave this Then I will eat your fucking eyeballs out.

Speaker 3:

Reinhold's just laughing his ass off.

Speaker 1:

He's just being an assassin, but I am the fucking beast around here. Reinhold laughs.

Speaker 2:

Oh, that's hilarious.

Speaker 3:

But let's go to the next event.

Speaker 4:

But, yes, but yes, silas, I'm gonna say just one for Nav there. I'm gonna quickly cut off one of the guards legs and start beating him with it.

Speaker 3:

Okay, so-.

Speaker 4:

Then I will feed it to Reinhold.

Speaker 3:

Are you kidding me? So today's event by the road, nothing happens. The world is gray. You roll the three, nice. And for this I'm going to say granted, the only other thing of actually there was, it was just rations. Nobody has to forge today, and literally Reinhold is eating so much that he's like distended out like a balloon, so he's just I'm gonna have so many kilos of Majestic, it would be amazing. All right, and now we're gonna I want you to roll for what's gonna happen during this? I swear to God. Okay, thank God. Huh, well, it has to happen. Better not make off with that much of-. You lost one day's worth of butt cheeks, but you did gain about four days' worth. You only lost.

Speaker 2:

That's all right. It was the flop, butt cheeks.

Speaker 3:

Then get all the cheek. But yeah, what the event was? Because she rolled she rolled she For the nightly event, nova rolled a six, which is a Wild Beast, steals D4 rations of food and she only rolled a one. So not that bad. And Nova gave us some of the most relaxed portion of the site, except Actually, no, reinhold's a little jealous. What he didn't think about doing, the amazing butt cheek trick. Only he would have done that. He's just looking at Nova like you're a cheat, and he's also curious because he's like you know, I was all he goes. I never thought I would ever see the day a female could be as fierce as me.

Speaker 2:

Well, I take that as a very high compliment, thank you.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, at this point, Eric is just like I, have been up with these fucking people. If they want to see an animal, I'll give them an animal.

Speaker 2:

There's no more gods left.

Speaker 3:

All right, so B Go on. You're rolling me a D8.

Speaker 6:

One moment.

Speaker 3:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 6:

Six.

Speaker 3:

Well, we used road Honestly, because it's a well-used road and it lifts up everybody's mood. It helps. So now we're going to go into the event. So roll me a D20.

Speaker 6:

Did you hear me a second ago? I said I hope that wasn't important because it was a two.

Speaker 3:

Um, you are just as lucky as Sam, because one to three means nothing particular happens. The world is gray, so nothing bad happens during our day of going out. Um, we have just enough rations to make it till we get to Galgenbeck. No, I'm sorry, wait, let me check the map, make sure. I just said the right city should have just enough supplies to make it to there. Yep, galgenbeck, because that's what I'm so, all right, b roll me a D12.

Speaker 6:

I got a nine.

Speaker 3:

Um, we encounter a pumpkin patch. Does anyone take any pumpkins? Hell yeah.

Speaker 6:

Eggie loves pumpkins.

Speaker 3:

Um, I'm going to ask everyone who takes pumpkins roll me a D4.

Speaker 4:

So I got a question, yes, Okay. So I'm not taking a pumpkin per se, but Tanglinmi are going to make a couple of jack-o-lanterns and I'm going to shun one to make it a crapple-antron.

Speaker 3:

Monster. So Nava rolled a two. So she gets two days worth of rations from the pumpkin. So Reinhold grabbed three days worth of pumpkins. Who else is taking pumpkins?

Speaker 5:

So Eggie got three and Paul took a four.

Speaker 3:

Awesome. So Reinhold's already started devouring about a day's worth of his rations, so now he only has two. We'll come to that later. Now B roll me one more, d12.

Speaker 6:

That's a three.

Speaker 3:

It's a quiet night, and it literally says this in the book Quiet night or once. And this is when everyone's sitting by the fire and everything. You guys all slowly turn as you hear Sid and Vicious both giggling like madmen, but then, at the same time, that's when you notice Reinhold is giggling with them as he's staring at the fire, and that's when you notice his eyes are pure black from how big his pupils have become. Oh shit, you guys. Do you see the people dancing in the fire? Man, nya, nya, nya, nya, nya, nya nya man.

Speaker 2:

I think I'm gonna throw my pumpkins in the fire.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, Eric is gonna get up and walk away from the fire.

Speaker 3:

A sickly but sweet smell comes from the fire and somehow you could tell it's very strongly hallucinogenic.

Speaker 5:

Yeah, they're just like pick-eaters.

Speaker 3:

And that's when you hear from a distance where that pumpkin patch was. God damn it. Who took our strongest trippin' balls? Motherfuckin' pumpkins, god damn motherfuckers. Yes, it is protected by very fiercely protective farmers, but we went there during the day.

Speaker 6:

Iggy hears all this and continues to put a pumpkin piece in his mouth.

Speaker 3:

Oh, iggy starts trippin' motherfuckin' balls Like. This is basically like when they talk about that government. Lsd, the brown acid that's basically what you're eatin'.

Speaker 6:

Iggy was already there, baby.

Speaker 3:

This is just the moment when the song just changes to Mook on the water.

Speaker 2:

I'm gonna sit back and enjoy the show.

Speaker 4:

Can I hoard a piece? I wanna make some pumpkin schnapps out of the rest of this. Oh, here they have.

Speaker 3:

I'm gonna be fair and say that Reinhold happily gives you a pumpkin.

Speaker 2:

You know I changed my mind. I want some of that schnapps.

Speaker 3:

I'm not gonna. I let you keep a pumpkin, I'm not gonna make it on the way.

Speaker 1:

Well, what guys are trippin' balls?

Speaker 2:

I mean I, leslie.

Speaker 3:

We had a long stressful day, only two people are trippin' balls so far.

Speaker 5:

Oh, you did. No, I said the mother doesn't like pick-eaters and I continued to eat them. Oh, shit.

Speaker 6:

Yeah, no, and then Iggy was just going into it.

Speaker 3:

Oh shit. So we got three people who are trippin' massively and Argorix is basically making absents.

Speaker 2:

Which I'm gonna ask if I can have some, I might as well join the fun too. Fuck it, I got plans for this later.

Speaker 4:

First I wanna see what, uh. I wanna see how Tango reacts to trippin' balls. He needs it after the week he had. He needs this.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, he does.

Speaker 4:

So you wanna wake up with a hyper-realistic portrait of me tattooed to his chest?

Speaker 3:

So this is, and one of the last things that happens during the night is Reinhold strips off all of his clothes, and this is when you all learn, in pure horror, why he had the nickname the elephant trunk. As we just hear the stereotypical anime sound effects, as everyone just looks at Reinhold's crotch and from the shadow of the flame it just literally looks like a man's leg dangling from his crotch. Oh man, and Ryan Holt's just. Hey look, I can make a helicopter.

Speaker 2:

Ryan Holt stop. Now he's going to push the wave out of the wind.

Speaker 3:

And the next day the only thing I want to paint is that Ryan Holt has tingle in a spoon. Tingle looks just a pure intense fucking horror.

Speaker 4:

Why is he sucking his thumb? Why is tingle sucking Ryan Holt's thumb? Yep.

Speaker 1:

At this point, Eric has grabbed the closest liquid that he can find and just splash everybody yeah. You know what? I'll let that people free. We all need a cold shower Time to wake up. You guys kept me up all damn night. Hey, you know what?

Speaker 3:

I just have to say that has to be the greatest night I have ever had in my life. I am keeping these fucking pumpkins.

Speaker 1:

Because you remember last night Everything. You guys were so close. The moon came out when I was on the moon that you couldn't even figure out and dude, really what?

Speaker 3:

Helicopter. Wait, I have no idea what you're talking about. All I remember is you had a giant waterfall of bugs coming out of your mouth and then we were like becoming one with the colors and dancing in the moonlight, and we got all groovy baby and this like, really Let me.

Speaker 1:

Eric is just going to just put his hand up. Really big guy. Let me go down the route of what happened last night, because at least I was the only one that was sober.

Speaker 4:

No, sober too.

Speaker 3:

OK we are sober too.

Speaker 6:

So, hold on, hold on, hold on.

Speaker 3:

Sorry.

Speaker 6:

Yeah, big guy Eggy wants to approach Eric and just tell him you're being a real downer right now. You should probably have some pumpkin.

Speaker 1:

But I do want to say Where's this guy? I'm some pumpkin. It just crushes it right in front of Eric, right in front of Eggy's face.

Speaker 3:

Now, once again, I do want to take the chance to let everyone know these episodes at Vernalguide and all that. But even then we're going to censor what happened last night. We'll leave that up to the listeners' imagination, Because even some things can be going too far and we are not crossing that route. Just know everything that happened that night is consensual.

Speaker 1:

No one did anything bad that night. A very wild tangent.

Speaker 3:

Exactly. We'll keep it to that. But just so for the listeners know everything that happened during the night. Consensual, there was no, none of that.

Speaker 1:

So continuing on. We're going into the final Pumpkin in front of everybody. Oh you monster.

Speaker 3:

And here you go. Thankfully Rinald hit, so sorry guys.

Speaker 5:

I was just saying while the whole tangent was going Paul does definitely need a pumpkin. She don't care God damn it.

Speaker 3:

Yes, I am so happy. So Rinald definitely hit some pumpkin. He had tingle hide away and Navanix.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I still have a pumpkin.

Speaker 3:

So, but now the really fun part, guys, is because we are actually not going to go into another travel section, because this is the reason why I chose last. We are actually going into a city, we are going into Galganbeck, and you know what, with how much this travel, how this travel worked and how short the traveling will be to Schleswig. This is where we're going to be finishing up. The rest of the session is here in Galganbeck, because quite a bit is going to happen this last session here in the city, because we're not just going to rush into the night scene as we enter the city, because, as we're going in, this is when, like approaching the city, this is when our absurd group of bastards they see what looks like, how they approach it all of a sudden becomes like the creepy, foggy atmosphere and all that's lit up is this strange merchant cart with a very terrifying looking man that fills everyone with dread, because the worst part about it is to each one of you, his features are different. The only thing that's the same is his voice to all of you Ha ha, ha, ha ha. Welcome. Ha ha ha.

Speaker 3:

Well, I see we have some interest custom. Ha ha ha ha. Who the name's Michael. I sell some Very interest. The only cost to theseites there's a piece of your soul.

Speaker 2:

I still have the job, souls.

Speaker 3:

Ha, ha, ha ha. Oh, you cheap bastard. God damn it. Fuck, I should. Holy shit, that was a loophole. I didn't think you'd motherfuckers would have Bea. How many of you. I'm going to have you, because I should have had you roll. I'm going to have you roll a D10 for me.

Speaker 6:

Ha, ha, ha ha, little woman, no sir.

Speaker 3:

Roll a D10 for me.

Speaker 6:

I got eight.

Speaker 3:

You have eight bottles of souls. That means you can buy eight things from him.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I can.

Speaker 6:

Yeah, he said a piece of your soul so. I understand it.

Speaker 3:

I'm sorry, you're right, and so let me see I don't mind me, I'm just kidding, I'm joking. But so, but, yeah, so God damn it. Son of a bitch, son of a bitch. So anyway, let me back into my character.

Speaker 3:

The story economy is way up right now, but yes, all these, of course, is a piece of your soul, of a piece of your soul. And I have some interesting items. Ha ha ha. Yeah, you see, I have a stone dagger. Now, each one of these items are, but quite, quite, yes, each one very cost, but they're very, very funny. I have a stone dagger, I have a tongue of a false prof, a two-hung-headed silver king yes, that's a two-headed and then I also have a vial of goblin. Then I also have a white wicked, a wicked brain. Ha ha ha. But then I also have a Galgenbeck death mass. Now, strangeness, do any of these tickle your fancy?

Speaker 2:

There's a question how many of each item do you have?

Speaker 1:

I only have one.

Speaker 3:

These are one of a kind cursed item.

Speaker 2:

Now I guess we'll take one of each. I slam the jaw down. Oh, god damn it. I slam the jaw down.

Speaker 3:

Now Janet in character. The merchant is fucking. It's like he's nutted in his goddamn robes, just like ah, ah, ah, ah Danny. I mean I am me, ah, ah, you are strange, ah, as he rides away in his cart. So let me read off when you do it. So the stone dagger does d4 damage.

Speaker 5:

Yeah, Sorry, before you read them off. Uh, Polta's gonna ask for the mask. She don't care.

Speaker 3:

Okay, so immediately, polta, this is what the mass does, so make sure to write this down. This is actually so stolen from an esteemed priest sarcophagus. Placing it on a corpse allows you to see how it died Considered heretical theft if caught with it. Holy shit.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I don't mind giving Polta the mask.

Speaker 3:

So now there's a stone dagger. It does d4 damage. You do a dR12 strength test to plunge the dagger into a living creature. The creature instantly turns to stone. If the dagger is removed, the creature springs back to life. The tongue of a false prophet if you consuming the tongue, allows you to cast powers at dr6 for one day. But any failure results in an arcane catastrophe. The two-headed silver ring oh, I'm sorry, it's a two-headed silver ring. So the two-headed silver ring. It's a silver ring in the shape of the twin basilisk head. Wearing this increases your crit and fumble range by one. So that means if you roll a 19, you get a crit, if you roll a two, that's a fumble. You may wear multiple rings. Are you fucking kidding me?

Speaker 2:

Oh yeah, I'm keeping that one.

Speaker 3:

So okay, so the ring was not one of a kind. So Nava immediately puts on the ring. Now your crit is 19. Wow, so now the vial of goblin ecore. It grows hot when goblins are about. Adding. A drop of cursed blood causes the mixture to bead up, pointing in the direction of the goblin that cursed you, Because listen, so for the listeners goblins are fucking nasty. When you fight a goblin, when it attack, goes to attack you, even if it misses, you get the goblin curse, which means in five rounds you turn into a goblin. And the only way to break the goblin curse is to kill the goblin that attacked at you All right, you gotta gobble him back.

Speaker 3:

So the wicked brain is, when rubbed, emits light equivalent to a torch, extremely fragile If broken. Everyone must tough, tough to a DR12 toughness or be blinded for one round. And those are the rest. Those are the other, the other items, um, uh, reinhold wants the dagger.

Speaker 2:

I hand them the dagger.

Speaker 3:

Yay, I think the vial of goblin blood would be good for would be a good fit for uh eggy.

Speaker 2:

Eggy, you want the blood vial.

Speaker 6:

Eggy can just have it. I don't have to borrow it.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, you can have it, buddy. I have no answer for this. This is for you. This is for you.

Speaker 6:

Eggy loves his friends. They give him such nice gifts.

Speaker 3:

Another suggestion I think would be a good fit would. So I think the tongue of a false prophet would be good for, would actually be another good fit for, um, for you actually. And the wicked brain should go to Eric.

Speaker 2:

Yep, that's fine. Tongues are delicious.

Speaker 3:

Remember, don't break it yet. It's a flashbang. So what does the brain do? It's a flashbang. When you break it, everyone around has to do a DR, tough, dr, 12 toughness work or be blinded for one round.

Speaker 6:

Well, technically it's a flashlight, and then, or when, you rub it, it's a torch.

Speaker 3:

Oh, I got an egg.

Speaker 6:

It's doing rabbit too hard man.

Speaker 3:

It's a egg torch flashbang. It's really cool.

Speaker 1:

Do I look, eric? This is going to look at everybody. Do I look like a chicken? Yes, how much your clock.

Speaker 5:

No, but so do you.

Speaker 3:

So, Reinhold, just like Cox's eyebrow and goes are you not a man that likes to fight? I would think so and would think to like use that to surprise the enemies and go in and slaughter. Damn and.

Speaker 1:

I thought I was. I can't stop eating anything for 24 hours and then shits everywhere.

Speaker 3:

And I thought it was a good, and Reinhold walks away. Well, no, seriously, reinhold was just like seriously, damn, mind you.

Speaker 2:

I mean it is effective. You can't really attack someone when you turn into a pile of shit.

Speaker 3:

And this is when we are coming to, finally, the reward for a really fun rewarding session where we just get to go to an inn, oh yeah. So first I'm going to see what kind of patrons are attending. So I roll a d20. I rolled a five and, oh well, there's a certain few patrons in there. See, you have, um, there's a certain individual who's having a party. His name is fancy boy, he's the half brother to oily boy and he is, he oily boy. In fancy boy. They're, uh, they're friends with a certain individual and he, it's his um, well, it's his birthday today. As everyone just hears a you layout Background music, bless them, yes, and you like, the wall looks weird, as you see, like a spotlight spinning on the wall and Reinholt goes pale as he just walks towards the restaurant area of the inn. As you just hear a go-go lantern man, go lantern man. Yeah, baby, oh, hey, nava.

Speaker 2:

Hi, lantern man yeah.

Speaker 3:

And this is when, if anyone looks, it's just what's spinning on the wall is the fact that this horrifying individual, who has another elephant trunk, has a lantern tied to it and he's doing a helicopter. This is why he's called lantern man. He's covered in oil and yeah.

Speaker 1:

I'm just gonna go chill, find a spot for me.

Speaker 3:

So, but in all funness, fun aside, everyone gets to go to the restaurant because there's no bullshit. Now the innkeeper is going to come. Now here's a serious question why is the innkeeper twitching you? Okay there, friend. Um, and there's actually a chart roll for this. So I roll the tin. Their caged bird has stopped singing and started speaking. Prophecy.

Speaker 4:

There's a group of jackasses that are coming. There's a group of jackasses that are coming.

Speaker 3:

Oh shit, there they are, told ya.

Speaker 1:

Oh, keep going.

Speaker 3:

Mark.

Speaker 1:

Bird, I was worried. I was worried, you guys would hear that.

Speaker 2:

Oh god, motherfucker about not be talking about us.

Speaker 3:

Now Mark Bird Cheers. So here's the thing. Reinhold loves his new friends. He actually dares think of you, maybe family so he pays the four silver each for today's menu. Allow me to tell you what everyone gets to enjoy. I roll the three. Today's amazing menu is a gold becky and stew with whole embryonic board Delic a delic delicious. And this is actually from the very fancy menu. So you guys basically enjoy a actual like five star meal.

Speaker 2:

Oh, thank you, reinhold.

Speaker 3:

But yeah, it's a gold becky and stew with whole embryonic board. They have, like that, perfect crunch to it, the broth perfect, thick, salty, right amount of pepper to it and, holy shit, this place got money. Because they got the money, they actually have onions and you recognize those pumpkin bits.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, eric pulls out a little book that he kept in his cloak and he's just writing down what he's tasting on with the food, and you know what Reinhold wanted to make sure everyone that this moment is special, because this is the start of our-.

Speaker 3:

Because these idiots think that we're saving their world. What they don't know is we are we are we're gonna be taking this world for them. Because Reinhold's not hungry for hungers for land. And he buys one more dish for everyone from the fancy menu and we get the and we finish up with a beautiful spiced rutabaga swede from dark sarkash soil A real delicacy. And we all finished it off with a amazing braised chicken with dangerously alcoholic wine drenched apple.

Speaker 1:

Oh, I haven't drank it that much in a long time.

Speaker 3:

Uh, anyway, and everyone in and the costs of the beds are paid for by Reinhold, and everyone actually enjoys a bed with real cotton Not and you all drift off into actual peaceful sleep. And as this ragtag group of absurd gum monstrous gum go to bed with the deeds that have gone on the last few days of their on their march to kill the first strange, morgana well, dr Steen has freed herself from that wet earth finally, and she looks and she goes of all people to have survived. I already knew I would have to deal with that bastard I threw in the river, but worse yet, my sister's daughter, really. And here I thought I personally killed her myself. I should have known. I my lies deceived me. Poulta, so good to see. And with that, dear listeners, we end off this session of Morgupork and get ready because in the next session we finish our travel to Slushwig and we confront the first strange citizen. So till the next one, everyone Bye. Alright, stop the craig, and let me just grab a drink too, because my throat is so dry.

Reinhold and Eric's Intense Encounter
Hunting and Foraging Plans
The Unveiling of a Powerful Book
Dreams, Screaming, and Road Travels
Pumpkin and Strange Merchant Encounters
Deceptions, Travel, and Confrontation in Morgupork