The Syncreate Podcast: Empowering Creativity

Episode 122: Creative Spark Series - Sharing Your Creative Self with Melinda Rothouse & Charlotte Gullick

Melinda Rothouse, PhD / Charlotte Gullick, MFA Season 1 Episode 122

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In this episode of our Creative Spark Series, Melinda & Charlotte explore both the fears and the benefits of sharing our creative selves with family, friends, and the wider world. Many creatives feel misunderstood by those closest to us, such as family members who may not “get” or value our work, so we feel hesitant or resistant to share our creative ideas and expressions with them. However, we believe there’s a positive risk in sharing and allowing ourselves to be known in this way, because it can actually allow our loved ones to become interested and invested in our creative lives.This episode, like the mini-episodes that preceded it, also includes insights from our book, Syncreate: A Guide to Navigating the Creative Process for Individuals, Teams, and Communities.

For our Creativity Pro-Tip, we encourage you to identify one trusted person in your inner circle that you could share your creative ideas with, take that initial step, and see where it leads.  

Credits: The Syncreate podcast is created and hosted by Melinda Rothouse, and produced at Record ATX studios with in collaboration Michael Osborne and 14th Street Studios in Austin, Texas. Syncreate logo design by Dreux Carpenter.

If you enjoy this episode and want to learn more about the creative process, you might also like our conversations in Episode 106: Creative Confessions, Episode 108: Breaking the Glass Ceiling in Our Minds, and Episode 120: Putting Yourself Out There

At Syncreate, we're here to support your creative endeavors. If you have an idea for a project or a new venture, and you’re not sure how to get it off the ground, find us at syncreate.org. Our book, also called Syncreate, walks you through the stages of the creative process so you can take action on your creative goals. We also offer resources, creative process tools, and coaching to help you bring your work to the world. You can find more information on our website, where you can also find all of our podcast episodes. Find and connect with us on social media and YouTube under Syncreate. If you enjoy the show, please subscribe and leave us a review! We’d love to hear your feedback as well, so drop us a line at info@syncreate.org

Episode-specific hyperlinks: 

Melinda Rothouse Website

Charlotte Gullick’s Website

The Syncreate book by Melinda Rothouse & Charlotte Gullick

Show / permanent hyperlinks: 

The Syncreate Podcast

Syncreate Website

Syncreate Instagram

Syncreate Facebook

Syncreate LinkedIn

Syncreate YouTube

Melinda Joy Music Website

Austin Writing Coach

Melinda: Welcome to Syncreate, a show for creative seekers. We explore the deep human stories of creativity, psychology and spirituality. We believe everyone has the capacity to create. Our goal is to demystify the process and expand the boundaries of what it means to be creative. What holds us back? Why do we get stuck and how can we fully embrace our creativity? 

We talk with visionaries and change makers and everyday creatives, working in a wide range of fields and media, from the arts to science, technology and business. We aim to illuminate the creative process, from imagination to innovation and everything in between. I'm Melinda Rothouse and I help individuals and organizations bring their dreams and visions to life. 

Charlotte: I'm Charlotte Gullick and I'm a writer, educator, and writing coach. We are the co-authors of a book on the creative process, also called Syncreate. At Syncreate, we’re here to support your creative endeavors. If you have an idea for a project or a new venture, and you're not sure how to get it off the ground. Find us at syncreate.org. Our book, now available in both print and audiobook format, walks you through the stages of the creative process so you can take action on your creative goals. We offer resources, creative process tools, and coaching to help you bring your work to the world. 

Hello everyone! (Laughter) Today, we're going to talk about sharing your creative self. What it means to let ourselves be more fully known, and what does it mean to take the risk to share with the people in our lives who we really are? And we're not saying everything (laughter) but, you know, for some people, they become artists because they're trying to figure out who they are. I think about a friend of mine who's trying to learn a musical instrument and not interested in keys or chords or anything like that… and it seems like what he's really trying to do is tune into himself. You know, like, that's like what the motivation with the music is. 

And I know with my family, they don't read very much of my writing. They just don't. And once in a while they'll ask me, like, “How’s your writing going?” And I feel, part of me, like, “Well, I don't know if I want to share that with you. And so, like, who is that person that's being reluctant? “No, it's not safe to share with folks…” but then starting to say yes when people take an interest, and I think it's like being able to integrate the different parts of yourself by sharing this really important part of who an artist is. It's like, is it a… there's this joy almost to coming into full being. 

Melinda: Yeah. Yeah. And I think a lot of people worry like, well, I know people who like, don't talk about their creative work at all with their family and they don't want their family to come and like, see them perform or anything like that, because I don't know, either they're self-conscious or they think they won't get it, or whatever. But I think there is like, a positive risk in sharing that and allowing ourselves to be known that way. They still may not get it or may not like it or may not understand it, but maybe they will. Maybe it will open up something new in the relationship. Right? And again, like, if we don't allow ourselves to be known, what are we missing out on? 

Charlotte: Well, the way I think about that is like, do we get in ruts with how we let ourselves be known? And in some places it may be very wise not to share, but then… but do we lock in in a negative way to a pattern that says, “Well, I just can't share my work…”? And then, you know, there's like… it actually keeps us stuck. And maybe part of creativity is about integration. About letting ourselves feel it's okay to be our fullest selves. Or you know, a peek into it. 

Melinda: Yeah. 

Charlotte: You know, like, with my mom, she did not like my first book at all, which is fiction. And then I was working on my next novel, and she's like, “There’s… what's the mother character like?” (Laughter) And I said, “She’s a badass and she's dead.” And my mom's like, “Perfect.” (Laughter) 

Melinda: “Least it's not me.” (Laughter) 

Charlotte: Yeah. So I think that's… but I mean, it's a little hurtful that I don't let them know or they don't ask, and like, which starts first? And am I willing to let creativity… because creativity expands so much of what my life is. But am I allowing that to happen with some of the people who I'm closest to, who I guard some things? So, I think there's an opportunity to be known. That’s just glorious. 

Melinda: Yeah. And sometimes it can be unexpected and positive ways. I mean, you kind of reminded me of this when we were preparing for the episode. You know, I follow a Buddhist path of mindfulness and meditation. And when I started doing that, I just felt like my family wouldn't get it. And I didn't really talk to them much about it. But then over time, you know, sometimes my parents, my dad and my mom separately, would like, kind of ask me a little bit about it, or they were like, a little like, “What is this that you're doing? What are these retreats you're going to?” 

And things like that. And I started to share a little bit more with them, and it led to some really interesting conversations and like, places we could go in our relationship that we had never gone before, and wouldn't have gone to if I hadn't shared it. 

Charlotte: It's amazing. I think that there are so many stories of people being wounded in sharing their creative self. And so, like, I think what we're trying to do here is maybe reframe the story or like, lead with, “You know what, there was this time when I shared something that was really core to who I am with people I didn't think would get it, and the outcome was way better than I expected.” And it's almost like you get an accelerated growth that can happen. 

Melinda: Yeah. 

Charlotte: But I'm thinking about the writing client who wanted to write a book, and their sister-in-law, who was a librarian, said something really negative to them. And that's the story that they're holding on to when it comes to family. But then there were… this person's daughters were extremely important. So, it's like, what rises to the top when it comes to being known with our creativity? And are we willing to open up a little to see what happens? 

Melinda: Yeah. Yes. Definitely. Again, that like, positive risk taking. So what's our Pro Tip for today? 

Charlotte: So, our Pro Tip is to identify someone in your life that you would consider sharing about your creativity with. And so, that's the first step. Like, who is someone in my life when, if I mapped out the people in my circle who I don't share with, who’s someone that I feel like I might try it out with? And then, so, just to find that person as a first step, and then if someone is feeling particularly bold, is to go ahead and share something, you know. 

And I think there are degrees of specificity. Like, with my sister, you know, who has been unsupportive of my writing at times and recently asked, “How’s that going for you? And what are you working on?” And so I'm like, “Oh. She’s actually asking.” And I can actually answer, and how specific do I want to be? And I'm like, “Oh, I'm working on a story about a family in Austin who are dealing with 2018 post-election challenges.” And then, you know, I didn't say anything that was all that revealing, but she was really interested. And so, like, that kind of generic test, and that's a Pro Tip. 

So people are like, “I could test the waters and see how it goes.” And then, “Oh, I'm going to tell more.” And it's been really lovely in the situation with my sister because she's getting invested. 

Melinda: Yeah. Yeah. And then, you know… and then these people who you may initially think, “Well, they don't care. They don't get it…”, they can become our advocates and our champions, and our cheerleaders, if we allow them to. 

Charlotte: Yeah. (Laughter) She'll send me news articles that she thinks are relevant for the novel because she is invested - 

Melinda: Which is really sweet. 

Charlotte: Yeah. If I hadn't opened up at all, she wouldn't know. 

Melinda: Absolutely. 

Charlotte: So, someone you think you could share part of your creative life with… and then if you're feeling really bold, talk to them. See how it goes. 

Melinda: Love it. 

Charlotte: Find and connect with us on YouTube and social media under @syncreate. If you enjoy the show, please subscribe and leave us a review. 

Melinda: We're recording today at Record ATX Studios in Austin, with Charlotte joining us from the Hudson Valley. The podcast is produced in collaboration with Mike Osborne at 14th Street Studios. Thanks so much for being with us, and see you next time.