The Idiots Guide
Sometimes it's about "ADULTING" enough for the day, and other times it's about Keeping a job, Feeding the family, Educating the kids, and Buying the stuff.
Most of us were taught how to read, write, and math good.
But never taught how to file taxes, change a tire, or cook a meal.
How in the world have we survived?
Well, have no fear, the Idiots are here to guide you.
We don't know much more about all the stuff but we might be just a little further down the road than you.
Make no mistake, most of our advice is more like don't try this at home.
Hope it helps!
The Idiots Guide
Laughing Through the Midlife Maze Age 30-50 Ep66 TIG
Ever wondered what it really takes to navigate the rollercoaster of adulthood between the ages of 30 and 50? Join Adam Richardson, the Profit Hacker, and Joe Haslam as we explore this transitional phase, filled with mounting responsibilities, career shifts, and the quest for personal fulfillment. We promise to equip you with insights on how to maximize these years, transforming them into a golden era of growth and achievement. Expect a candid, humorous exploration of the physical and emotional changes we all face as we mature, with plenty of laughs and lessons along the way.
We dive into the intricate dance of balancing priorities, especially for parents juggling their children's ambitions with their own well-being. From the unexpected expenses that catch us off guard to the importance of mental health, we tackle the challenges head-on. Our honest discussion highlights the necessity of setting boundaries and taking time for self-care, all while avoiding the dreaded burnout. Whether you're a parent or not, the strategies we share will help you maintain equilibrium in your personal and financial life, ensuring a healthier, happier you.
Looking to secure a financially stable future? We've got you covered. In the latter part of our conversation, we stress the critical role of financial planning as you approach your 50s. Discover how savvy investments and proactive estate planning can pave the way for a stress-free retirement. We also touch on the temptation to procrastinate, sharing personal anecdotes and light-hearted dad jokes that remind us all that progress is more important than perfection. So, join us on this journey of discovery, where laughter and learning go hand-in-hand.
Today on the Idiot's Guide. So they say you're officially all grown up when you hit 30. But let's be honest, most of us have just been winging it and we still are Somewhere between 30 and 50, though things start to get real. It's growing up time for real, and we're not just talking about those gray hairs sneaking up. We're talking about the money moves, life shifts and how you really level up in adulting during these years. We'll talk about today big moments, tough choices and why this stage of life, even though it's kind of mid, is where the training wheels finally come off.
Speaker 1:I'm your host, adam Richardson, aka the Profit Hacker, and I'm joined by the man in charge, mr Joe Haslam.
Speaker 1:Welcome to the Idiot's Guide, one of the things I would say right now in my life. I'm kind of in this category, but I'm I'm nearing the other end of it. You know I had a conversation with my son about this, about, like you know, this is the, the era, but we were talking about how you know, on our next episode we're going to talk about empty nesters, uh, and I was like man, like I'm old, I'm gonna land right smack dab in that category because my both my, my boys will be in their 20s. My daughter will be a junior in high school. Uh, when I hit 50 years old and and I'm like I didn't, I couldn't, I didn't think that that was like the age but I like, if I look at all of my other friends who are in their fifties and have any kids, they're empty nesters, you know, and I'm like I didn't realize that that's man. It's kind of depressing because most of my adult life has well, a large portion of my adult life now at least the majority of those years, has been with children.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, that's why we call it stage 4.5, because it's still that adult phase, but it's a different type of adult phase.
Speaker 1:It's kind of a weird thing because it feels like I said the word mid at the intro and honestly it's about that. It's like it doesn't feel like there's anything to celebrate. Yeah, you know, it's like man, I raised kids successfully. You know this, or?
Speaker 1:I held a job for a very long time. You know like I'm hitting I'm hitting the 20 year mark by the end of this era and your company is going. Man, you've done a great job here and you're like I'm not dying. You're like I just can't go get another job anywhere now because I have too much experience. Yup.
Speaker 2:I mean that's what this stage is. I mean you're just, you're just grinding on the wheel, you know you're trying to make sure your kids survive.
Speaker 1:That's depressing the win is the fact that your kids are alive. Yes, like this.
Speaker 2:This is probably and and this is one of the hard things this is why a lot of people not just men they joke about men. But this is why a lot of people not just men they joke about men. But this is why a lot of people go through a midlife crisis is because this is such a boring stage of life. I mean, it's so boring we're not even giving it an entire stage. So I mean, this is just that stage where it is just get through it. Yeah, and that's why it's important. So you know, we've talked a lot about planning, planning ahead, making sure you're planning for things you know proactive, financial planning, all that. That's why it's so important in this stage to make sure you're planning and setting aside and doing all that stuff. Because it is, it gets really boring just slogging through the day every single day. But yeah, this is a boring stage of life.
Speaker 1:But it's not. I mean, you think about it. You've got home buying. That's typical You've got. You know you're not just like entry-level customer service in a career Now you're talking about like refining professional level stuff that you're doing, vp kind of stuff, where you're like the honcho in charge, the man in charge Okay, you know you're, you're growing, potentially growing a family. You're you're looking at maybe investments or investing heavily in, not just like financially but like hobbies. You know, like I really, really want to be good at this, you know, and you refine that. Or you know, you look at like the idea of, of. You know I, I think it's. It's one thing to take a backtrack, backpacking trip through Europe when you're 18 years old and you have no responsibilities. It is moving mountains when you're in your forties.
Speaker 2:Okay okay, yeah, and it's not just for people with kids and I think a backpacking trip sounds completely unreasonable at that age.
Speaker 1:Like, yeah, I would go help hotel stop. You know. Like exactly even dinks train rides would have that same thing, you know when you're 40.
Speaker 2:In the middle of this half stage, you're waking up and everything on you is creaking.
Speaker 1:I've been diagnosed with excessive oldness.
Speaker 2:You're not going to go on a backpacking trip through Europe because you sleep on one of those hostel beds. If there is a bed, a hostel cot, and it's going to be 10 times worse. So it's like yeah. I got the money, I'm going to a hotel.
Speaker 1:I grounded my son yesterday for that, because he was sitting in my chair and I was like you're in my chair, you need to move. And he's like hold up, I'm going to be you. And he's like, just like, like making this big dramatic get out of the seat thing, and I was like you're grounded.
Speaker 2:It's true, though yeah, and so I mean. But so anyone in this stage of life, this is, this is where you're gonna if you don't actively engage in this stage of life. It is so boring, and that's why it's so important to actively engage.
Speaker 1:Well, I think it's important to note like you're no longer just. You know it's it's your money now wears big boy pants. You know it's it's no longer about just rent and fun nights out. It's it's not that now. Now you're talking about things that will will. Those moves will impact you for decades to come, and so you really have to be very intentional along the way. And that doesn't mean lock your life down and no fun. The fun doesn't go away. It's something that you absolutely need to have. It just means that the ramifications of poor decisions is a longer devastation than just a little bit.
Speaker 2:Well, and it's important to set aside for fun. You have to plan for the fun to happen, yeah, and so if you don't, life gets really, really boring. So set aside time, make an annual vacation budget, make an annual vacation plan. Make sure you're doing something so that you're having that fun every single year, yeah, or a couple of times a year, you know, whatever works for you.
Speaker 1:And I think it's it's you're trying to when you're younger, you're you're trying to kind of gain a sense of where you're headed, what direction you're going, especially with your finances. Like, how do I feel comfortable managing the money that I make? You know, like, how do I feel comfortable managing the money that I make? You know what things are prioritized in my life. You know those are. You're kind of ironing that out in the earlier years but then once you hit this 30 to 50, you know you're really kind of you've defined those things that matter to you and now you're kind of like you're you're really really mentally focused on those and and achieving. If you, if you haven't achieved it, there you're, you're set on it, you have your targets. But I think you know like it's what are those things there? You know sometimes it's a mortgage, sometimes it's, you know, paying off school debt. Yeah, you know, if you have kids, it's making like school fees. If you want them to go to a nice school with a tuition, yeah, it's tuition fees. Like you know, surprise, you have a roof that you need to repair.
Speaker 1:All of a sudden you know, and uh, we, we bought a house. And you know, a couple of years ago. You know we've only been in the house for a few. Well, we've been in the year for a few. Well, we've been in the house for over five years now. But about two and a half years ago we had to replace the roof. The roof needed it done. We were also going solar, so making some home financial decisions. But it was good. I'm glad we did that before we put solar panels on there, cause that roof needed to be repaired before we. We did that. But it was a good thing Like it. I think the thing about it is is like you're buying that home idea. It. It sounds neat, it sounds nice Not for everybody, but you know, until you realize that you've basically paid thousands of dollars for a plumber to yell at your pipes. You know is fun like that. Those are the highlights.
Speaker 2:I'm not the homeowner because I don't want to own a home. It's not the thing for me. I don't want to be out there mowing the lawn every Saturday. I don't want to be out there having to maintain everything. I like the idea of a organization that comes in and mows your lawn for you, that does all this for you and repairs your place for you. I mean you're just, you can move whenever you want.
Speaker 1:I mean you can have all that in a home too.
Speaker 2:It's just a lot more expensive.
Speaker 1:You're right. You're right, it's nickel and dime, especially when you're talking about, like man, my furnace is broke and you're like you got to call the landlord or I am Dang it, I'm the landlord.
Speaker 2:Exactly so yeah, I mean it is not for everyone to actually own a home and some people people like me prefer not to. Yeah, I like the idea of the flexibility, of not being tied down to a place for five years or 10 years or 20 years, because if I don't like my neighbors, I can move I, you know, like my wife and I have been notoriously for years and years, we we've always moved About once a year.
Speaker 1:It's kind of this military aspect of us that we are up moving to the next location often and are fine with it. That usually means that half our life is in boxes all the time, so it just depends on what half we have out for that place that we live in. Yeah, I think, you know, having three kids and raising them, we kind of saw that. You know, even like, even our desire to move to a different state that we want to live in has has kind of taken a back burner to going. You know when, when we are, when our, when our kids are not like looking for that stability constantly in their life, then we'll uproot and go there, you know. But but right now it seems a little bit more responsible for us to be like look, I'm going to let my kids stay in their lane that they're comfortable with and see that consistency and that's part of the reason why we don't pick up and leave is, you know, we have, we have a house that we were good with, you know and you're right.
Speaker 1:Like then, not everybody's that way. You know, like I have to pay separately for a different lawn service if I want somebody else to come and take care of yeah.
Speaker 2:So yeah, so I mean, that's the thing is, in this stage of life, you're making a lot of these decisions, You're looking at a lot of these different things. How do I set this up this? I mean, this is a very serious stage of life where you're you're looking at all the details and so it is very boring because nothing really happens, but a ton of things actually happen.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Well, our channel is isn't just about content, it's about connections. By subscribing, you're joining a community of like-minded individuals who share your interests and passions, so let's grow together, forge meaningful connections along the way, hit that like, hit that subscribe button and stay in the know about what's going on for every episode that we put out. All right. So now we're hitting this kind of question about it's not quite a midlife crisis, it's more like just a midlife. And you're in the middle of like nothing exciting but everything super impactful. Yes, so you know kids, careers, keeping your sanity, and you know, for parents, like obviously you're balancing all of that kind of stuff kids, education, extracurricular stuff, man, like the thought of how many directions kids go, like just football season for one of my kids, like neglects. The other two and the other two are like why can't I, can't, I gotta do this, I want to go do this. And I was like right now we're working on our favorite child and that's. You know, I don't tell that to them obviously.
Speaker 2:But oh, family dynamic is going to be an issue now.
Speaker 1:Gymnastics, that kind of stuff. My daughter she's literally watching YouTube videos learning and applying. My front lawn is her gym mat and she is really good. Never been to a gymnastics class and really I guarantee you should be excellent at it. It's just here in Utah. It's really hard to find a good gym that's not ungodly expensive for garbage trainers, you know. So, anyway, that's that's.
Speaker 2:that's my life you know, like I said, I'm in this category, so I could be like and's my life.
Speaker 1:Like I said, I'm in this category, so I could be like and this, yes, oh, and don't forget this, this is terrible, this is horrible.
Speaker 2:And I think that's one of the big things. I mean, it is a balancing act. You've got to balance the necessities of your kids, you've got to balance the necessities of yourself, yeah, and all these different aspects so that you don't burn out, so that everyone still enjoys everything. And it really is just about surviving this stage and making sure your kids survive. But even those without kids, you're still balancing your career goals. You are balancing where you're going in the future for, um, you know, paying off school debt, any of those personal, uh activities that you're doing. There's still a lot of balancing that has to be done during this stage, yeah, and so it's not just about kids. There's a lot that goes on during the stage that you've got to look at. Where am I going to be doing this stuff?
Speaker 1:I think one of the things to note is like this is in the earlier years. You're kind of up and down about all sorts of stuff. You're like, oh man, this is going to be expensive. Oh man, this is blah, blah, you know. You're like I'm living the high life, man, I can buy two cars right now. You're like, yeah, wait until you have a mortgage or pay rent, and then you can't afford two cars because you also have to pay for where you live.
Speaker 1:You know, oh, utility bill, what is that? You know all of it, everything's a surprise. It's like when you're a baby and you're learning how to walk and everything's new. You know. You're like, oh my gosh, a ball. You know it's, it's the same thing, except for, like, financial surprises. You know it's oh my gosh, I didn't know that a transmission costs surprises. You know it's oh my gosh, I didn't know that a transmission costs that much. You know.
Speaker 1:So you're having those earlier years that you know. Hopefully you, you also have, uh, uh, maybe you have some parental assistance in some of those aspects. But, um, but, but this, this part of life for you once you get to these years, you're kind of, in this, it levels off, it's straight. There's a stride. You know you're kind of like, okay, we're smooth, like we're good. Now I like I've, I've got my targets, I'm working my way up. You know I'm I'm all of these different things I'm just kind of like aiming towards, you know, hitting benchmarks. That's that. I mean.
Speaker 1:Obviously, surprises do happen, but I think it's one of those things where you've experienced surprises in your past and so now you know how to better prepare, just mentally even, maybe not not not necessarily financially prepared, ideally, yes, but but you know, but you may not have that as an option, at least mentally, you have a little bit more resiliency or fortitude about that. But then all of a sudden, this is also that time where, because you have some of those experiences, sometimes that bandwidth comes into play and you think that your bandwidth is better because you've already been down this road. You know this, you've experienced this, and then all of a sudden it's too much. And then stress kicks in and you know, some some it like leads to some bad financial decisions being made, that kind of stuff. So it's just, you know, there are some good things about it, but there's also some tough things that you got to keep an eye out for because it's an easy era and time in your life where that burnout can really happen quickly.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and that's why it's important to you know you prioritize your mental health.
Speaker 2:You prioritize enjoying life, because if you don't, you're just going to grind and grind and grind life. Because if you don't, you're just going to grind and grind and grind, and then you're going to get to the point where you suddenly realize you've just been grinding yourself into burnout, and so you've got to take the time to recognize okay, I need a break, even though I'm not in burnout yet. I've got to take a break Because if you let yourself get to burnout, it's that much worse and you may blow all of your money on that midlife crisis, new Ferrari in your parking lot or in your driveway. And so you've got to make sure that you're taking the time to enjoy life throughout all that, and sometimes that means taking priorities away from other aspects. You know, you know've got kids that are doing a ton of different activities and all you're doing is just facilitating those activities all the time. You've got to take time for yourself, and so you have to learn to tell your kids okay, we're not doing this activity because now I'm going to take time for myself.
Speaker 1:I just bring the cooler full of booze to the game.
Speaker 2:Okay, well, self-medicating with alcohol is not necessarily the best burnout release, but just take the time You've got to be able to, because a lot of people prioritize their kids during this stage and, yes, prioritizing your kids is important, but you cannot prioritize them over yourself, yeah.
Speaker 2:So one example that I like to give about this when, if you are, uh, climbing a mountain, okay, and if there is someone that needs help climbing that mountain that you're with so someone in your group, so say, your family you cannot help them up from below, and so if you're in a worse position, or a mental health position, whatever it is burnout, whatever if you're in a worse position, you cannot push them up.
Speaker 2:And so, if your kids need help, you can't prioritize them so much that you fall below your ability to help them, and so you have to take the time to get yourself right and then you can help your family up that mountain, yeah, and so that is really important, because a lot of people prioritize their kids. They get into burnout and now they're in a much worse position, and that happens a lot in this stage of life because of everything that goes on. But take time out for yourself and put yourself in a position where you can continually help those around you, because you're helping yourself, and so that is just as important a priority as anything else that goes on in this stage, because it is so easy just to grind away and not even recognize that you have pushed yourself into that burnout phase.
Speaker 1:And I think it's important to note, the key word here is balance. It is, you know, there are so many things that feel like are absolutely the priority and and they all are. It's just understanding that you know you're not going to give, you know, a hundred percent to everything, because you, you don't have it. You know you, you've got to look at what is a, what is a good balance to be able to say, you know, like, well, you know, timmy needs braces and you know, granted, you want to do that, like my son needs braces. And I'm like, oh, I don't want to do that. You know, like it's going to happen, but I'm not looking forward to it, but it's some of those costs that come into play.
Speaker 1:They want to do extracurricular activities football practice, those kinds of things, gymnastics, and you know, my, my other kid, wants to do something else rock climbing or something like that. And then there's like, oh, what about? Like? Well, like, if I'm running around here, here and here, and they're all in, you know, they're all 15 minutes away from each other by the time you get there on time, I have zero time. I'm going to turn around, go pick up the other one that I just dropped off, and then the next and the next, and I have zero time for myself, because all I've done is just cart kids around everywhere. And you know, though that's, I guess, a stimulating for their development, it's, it's, it's absolutely draining everything that you have, because then you go home and they're like what's for dinner? And you're like you shut your face. I have been driving your butt around everywhere. Are you kidding me?
Speaker 2:Can you send some frustration here about our real life? Um, but no, I mean that that is, that's what happened. And you've got to your. Your kids are never gonna like you. I don't think this is a surprise to anyone. Um, my kids love me. Uh, no, the reality is, it's not going to be the end of the world if you tell them no. They already don't like you, so it's it's not going to be the end of the world if you tell them no. They already don't like you, so it's not going to be any different if you tell them no.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because you do have to prioritize yourself. So it's just one of those things where you have to make sure you're prioritizing, you're balancing, and even for people without kids. So when I talk about my mountain climbing example, it's not just family, it's anyone that you're around, because you probably have a large friend group and everyone goes through their own individual struggles. So even when you're a dink or a sink, a single income, no kids, um, there, these are situations where you know you are looking at making sure you're prioritizing mental health. It's maybe a little bit easier as a dink to prioritize some of those things going on vacations, taking care of yourself getting away from the grind but at the same time, there are no kids that are pulling you out of the work grind. So you may be focusing so much on work that you're not prioritizing your mental health over work. Well, and if it's a ding scenario like or prioritizing your partner's health as well.
Speaker 1:you know, like considering the fact that you you have, you have the the opportunity to get too consumed in a work environment and neglect your partner, you know, in that scenario as well. So you know it's all of it again comes back to that balance making sure that you're intentionally taking a look and honestly, like you know, when it comes to your financial needs, they're very different than when you were in your mid twenties. They're extremely different from when you were 18 years old or younger. So it's probably going to be your best benefit to at least go back to that and look at some of those things so that you're not just flying by the seat of your pants going I can afford it and you're like no, you can't.
Speaker 1:Not at all Like within your means is really super, duper important. And you know, being able to go back to see your plan, what your plan or your budget is, you know from time to time quite regularly honestly will help you adjust to making sure that balance exists in your life, not just for financial obligations but to make that time for vacations, to get away, to take those breaks, to have extracurricular activities. All of those things you can add in with a good, well-balanced budget plan.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
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Speaker 1:This is kind of in that era where we're distracted by a lot of other shiny objects in our financial life. One of the things that we can't ever neglect is the fact that when we're older we're going to be, we need to be grateful about our decisions that we're making right now. And part of that is legacy, you know, like those are our legacy years. And you know, when we're 50 and beyond and I don't want to say 50. 50 is like prime, okay, I wish, but it is those years that I want to keep on my radar when I'm making the decisions, thinking about, you know, what am I going to do?
Speaker 1:For earlier I mentioned like the decisions I make can have ramifications for decades, and these are the decades that I don't really want to face consequences for poor decisions. Now, yeah, you know, and a lot of us run into that kind of hot water where we are facing consequences into our fifties and trying to piece it all back together again so that we have something in our seventies, you know, and it's like, okay, I don't really want to live that way. I want to. I want to build something stronger. But right now, it is realizing that some form of long-term outlook whether that's investments or retirement plans or something, something to where I'm considering my future is important to have. You know, I'm putting that piece in place, at least right now. You know, would you agree?
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean, this is once you hit 50, you don't want to have to work anymore. That's the big thing. And what you do in this stage of life is what then translates to that yeah. And so if you are putting money aside, if you're putting it into investments, if you're putting it into savings, if you're whatever it is, you don't have to invest, just put money aside. You know it's. Whatever you're doing in this stage of life will translate in greater function to later in life, because there will be a growth on that, there will be a return on that money that you're setting aside. And so it means that when you're 55, you can retire and you've got enough money for the rest of your life. Or you've set yourself up so that maybe you can't fully retire, but maybe now you can work part-time. Yeah, and so you go, and instead of having to do that daily grind, now you're retired doing something that you enjoy doing. So my long-term retirement plan has always been to become a teacher.
Speaker 1:And so, like a high school teacher oh man, that does not sound like retirement. Oh see, that sounds like retirement to me. I meet so many teachers that hate teenagers because they're teachers.
Speaker 2:Oh, I love it. I deal with teenagers all the time. They're great.
Speaker 1:I mean, I've been a youth leader for years, so I don't mind teenagers. I struggle with my own, you know, but I see them a lot more. So it's, it's a little, I see. I know all their quirks.
Speaker 2:And I'm like I see all the way through you kid, but yeah, so that's. For me, retirement is not really ever retirement. I I don't ever plan on getting to a stage in life where I sit at home all day watching tv or puttering around the yard.
Speaker 1:That that is just I can do, like the permanent tenure at a university, being a professor that just indoctrinates kids in something that I feel like is my opinion.
Speaker 2:I want to get to him in the form of years. Do I have a weird shift of college?
Speaker 1:Just a bit. It's not a bad perspective, joe, it's okay.
Speaker 2:But yeah, so retirement is different for everyone. But what you do in this stage of life, between the ages of 30 and 50, really translates to what your options are for that stage. If you do nothing in this, you set nothing aside well, those later years are going to be a lot of hard work. Yeah, later years are going to be a lot of hard work. If you set money aside, if you manage things properly now that's no guarantee, but if you manage things properly, then you have a much better leg up to be able to enjoy your retirement, spend time relaxing and enjoying whatever that is for you. So this is where that really takes hold, because you're doing the grind, you're working hard so that you can set that all aside for later.
Speaker 1:I think a thing to consider on the positive side is the decisions that you make now can provide that secure future for you and those you care about. You know you have the ability now to even set up beyond your life, you know, to your kids and your kids' kids, and so on and so forth. The other part about that is that it's really easy to procrastinate. You're like you know I'll be here next year. You're like, well, you don't know, man, statistically there's a possibility that you're not. You know, and or, and also just just generally feeling overwhelmed, that stress can be unbelievably overbearing and um and so like those are some things. That it's. They're just, they're tough situations. If you, if you postpone things or you put it off until till tomorrow, you know we're not guaranteed tomorrow, so right, wow, that took a dark turn, hey, but it's true.
Speaker 2:I mean you, you have to think about this. Is that stage where you have to start thinking about those things in more earnest?
Speaker 1:what is it? There's a line in a song that we listened to that's it goes. He's like you could get cancer and he goes, but I'm healthy. Healthy people still get cancer.
Speaker 2:Cancer, that's still out there.
Speaker 1:You know you're like that's true.
Speaker 2:That's why I said you're not guaranteed tomorrow? No, no, you're not. But guaranteed tomorrow? No, no, you're not. Um, but yeah. And so you have to think about those things. I mean, you have to think about your partner, you have to think about your kids, if you have them, you have to think about the future of those people around you, and what are you going to do with that?
Speaker 1:I remember addressing this in the military going off to combat is, you know, writing a living will, um, and not like in your older years? You're like writing an actual like will. You know your, your will and testament and you know so by the time. Like, once you're, once you're gone, you're. You know they're reading this. Some attorney is reading this and saying my, you know, my spoons collection is yours, you know, whatever, but it's, it's weird because I think about, like, when I was younger and having to do a living will, like that was one kind of terrifying. It was not comfortable to write something about that but also like the reality of how important a will is. I think that's what that emphasized is that you know I'm going to a place. I did it because I'm a combat veteran.
Speaker 1:I went off to war and the likelihood of me not returning is possible. There is a possibility you know, and that you know greater than your average average situation that, like there are statistics that you can run into issues in your normal everyday life. Now add the violence of war, and that's where I was at, and so you're like your in your normal everyday life. Now add the violence of war, and that's where I was at, and so you're like your odds go up. So you want to make sure that there are some things in place, like a living will, to make sure that, if that happens, you have those affairs in order. Well, now you're legitimately talking about your life and having a will is part of that. Having those things to know that. Look, if I move on and I'm not here anymore, how am I parsing out what I have to my family, to my kids, to my loved ones, to anyone, to my best friend I've known?
Speaker 2:for years, whatever.
Speaker 1:It doesn't matter, but it kind of feels like Wills, or kind of feel like picking out toppings for a pizza you'll never eat. But honestly, it's the future. You, or the people that you are taking care of, will thank you for that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and there's a great site. They're not a are taking care of will. Thank you for that. Yeah, and there's a great site. They're not a sponsor, but it's freewillcom I think it's com. They do free wills yeah, so it's a team of lawyers who do this pro bono. They help people out because they understand the importance of getting a will, yeah, and so all they ask they do ask, you know, donate if you can donate to them in your will, um, so they can continue to do this work, do this effort, um, for their time. But that's a great site. Uh, there are other sites that you can go to or you can uh pay someone to help you with a will, but I do like free will. Um, again, not a sponsor, it's just someone that I have used, someone that I've recommended for years. They do great work and I really support their engagement with people and and wanting to make sure everyone has a will because it is so important. So, again, not a sponsor, just someone that I like and have used before.
Speaker 1:So I think another part is you know, this is the kind of this. This is the time of your life where you get to determine what kind of grandparent you will be, not, not?
Speaker 2:not that you are one. Hopefully, yeah, hopefully. In this case, you're not a grandparent.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, it can happen but you know like if you're in your early 30s and you're already a grandparent, something, something is you've developed a bad habit, not necessarily so you could be a foster parent okay, all right. Who has older?
Speaker 2:kids, who then has okay, you know, children. Yes, you're right, you could be a grandparent at a younger age. Uh, because of other reasons. Yes, generally speaking, hopefully you're not a grandparent.
Speaker 1:You're right, you're right, you're right. I, uh, I, I, I think that, uh, you know it's, it's just kind of what kind of grandparent do you want to be? Do you want to be that fun grandparent, or do you want to be the one that forces your whole family at a dinner to cut coupons out and you're just grumpy yelling at your you know lawn all the time on your front porch?
Speaker 2:I like the grumpy grandpa I I do too.
Speaker 1:Sit out there on my rocking chair.
Speaker 2:You're right, you're right, little kid. Yeah you, your music's too loud.
Speaker 1:I already do get off my when I was, when my son was first born, my first son years ago, we, uh, we lived in this neighborhood where they would just zip down our street and we were actually like all of us mutually were looking for, uh, um, like the, you could buy the speed bumps, oh yeah, like the plastic ones, and lay them across your street, Cause these cars were flying and it wasn't a very long street, it was maybe eight houses long to the next block. So I was like why are you going so flipping fast? And our neighbor across the street retired from Coors and he was just this drunk, angry guy and you'd hear him inside my house if a car's zipping down the street. It was so great comedy. Like he was passionate about maintaining speeds on on our street. It was great. I was like I need that. He is the speed, he is our neighborhood speed bump. It's great, nice.
Speaker 1:But uh, like it's just these are the years that you're not a grandparent. You. You could, maybe there's a possibility. I don't want to, you know, just eliminate that. But but for the most part, you're just kind of planning what kind of grandparent you want to be. Yeah, you know. So, getting serious about investments, you know that estate planning idea or creating a financial safety net, are all kind of where you're at right now. They don't sound like big moves, but they are some of the biggest moves you will ever make for the rest of your life. And you know, and, and everyone around you your family, your loved ones, you, your future you will be grateful because you've made some of those choices along this way. You know, right, yep, all right.
Speaker 1:Well, to kind of recap what we just talked about, you know milestones buying a house. You know leveling up that career, big deals about what's going on those are kind of some of the big milestones that you're dealing with. But the most important element of all of this stuff, as we're kind of reaching those milestones, is the balancing act between you know whether it's kids or no kids, but you know making sure we have self care, that's that's a high priority, just all the general things that come at you like a freight train when you're in your 30s to 50s, and you know and and, how to handle that, how to do that. And right now, when you're in your thirties to fifties, and you know and and and how to handle that, how to do that, and right now you're really laying the groundwork that you're going to stand on when you're retiring, you know, right, yep. So I think an important element is we we call this one growing up, because it you aren't necessarily like, um, we know you're not growing up, but but your, your, your financial future is now wearing big boy pants and and you are.
Speaker 1:You are making those big moves that that require you to to grow up a bit and and understand that you know whether bit and understand that you know whether it's a great positive outcome or a negative consequence for whatever you do, they're a lot bigger things at this point, and they hit harder and they hurt worse. So it isn't about having all of it figured out, though it isn't, and it's about making smarter moves now, with, with the lessons that over the last you know few, maybe decade or so that uh of experience that you've, you've learned along the way that you're, you're applying that wisdom into your future. You know financial future, so you know whether you're budgeting for braces or what is it. Bali, bali, trip to Bali, bali, bali, bali's fitness man. That place was trash. Just just remember. You're being a grownup is less about perfection and more about progress. That's. That's the important thing to note Nobody has it perfect. We're all winging it.
Speaker 2:Anything else you want to add? No, I think we're good there. Time for jokes with Joe All right, we've got our dad joke for the week. Here we go. Okay, what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?
Speaker 1:I know this one. I can't. It's not that I don't like, I didn't read the card, I just know this one see, this is the problem with dad jokes to another dad it's true all right.
Speaker 2:So what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back a stick?
Speaker 1:there you go, you got it all right, here's one. What do you? What's long, brown and sticky a stick, there you go this is jokes with joe.
Speaker 2:Oh, I'm sorry, goodness trying to upstage me here.
Speaker 1:I don't want to. You can have the spotlight. It's fine. We've reached the end of our show for today. Thank you for listening. Thank you for watching. Life's too short, so keep laughing and learning and remember idiots have way more fun. Check your shoes.