Creative Connections: Encouraging Communication through Music and Art

On this episode of Champions of Autism,  we get hang out with Tammy Vice.
Tammy and her husband have a beautiful daughter Morgan who has autism.  Morgan is now an adult and Tammy shares how they navigated autism in the early years before much was known about it.

In today's episode we discuss:
* How the arts and music help  her communicate and connect with Morgan.
* What it looks like after high school
* How she is helping to educate the community about autism.
* Plus a special treat at the end about "Waiting on a Brown Truck"
 
You can learn more about Tammy and Morgan at:
 
Wordpress Blog - tbvice.wordpress.com  

Know The Hope, Inc. -  https://knowthehope.com/

Facebook Tammy Vice - https://www.facebook.com/tammy.vice/

Facebook Morgan and Tammy Vice - https://www.facebook.com/tbvice/

Facebook 52 Blue Mondays - https://www.facebook.com/52BlueMondays/

52 Blue Mondays Book -  

https://bookshop.org/p/books/52-blue-mondays-morgan-vice/8379960

Youtube Channel - https://www.youtube.com/TammyVice/

Music can be found on Apple, Spotify, and most digital outlets.  

Are you someone who loves someone on the spectrum? You can find 5 key strategies for parents of kids on the autism spectrum at https://www.championsofautism.com/5-strategies

We would love to have you as a member of The Champions of Autism Community. This is a community for anyone who loves someone on the spectrum. Our stories are different, yet familiar.
https://www.championsofautism.com/community

 | ReplyForward

Are you someone who loves someone on the spectrum? You can find 5 key strategies for parents of kids on the autism spectrum at https://www.championsofautism.com/5-strategies

We would love to have you as a member of The Champions of Autism Community. This is a community for anyone who loves someone on the spectrum. Our stories are different, yet familiar.
https://www.championsofautism.com/community

Transcript

hey everyone. Welcome back to the Champions of Autism podcast, and we're super excited to talk to one of our own members here of our champions of autism community, to learn more about her journey with autism. Tammy Vice, welcome Uhhuh thank you for having me. Appreciate it. Yeah, we're excited to talk to you today, Tammy and I.

Have known each other for a couple of years. We know each other from our church and through our children, through different activities that they do. Unfortunately, we don't get a lot of time to chat together because we're both going in different directions with our kids.  So I'm really looking forward to diving a little bit deeper and hearing more about  you and your families.

Journey with autism because you bring a little bit of a different perspective into the world of autism as you have an adult child on the spectrum. So we want to talk a little bit about her which by the way, I adore Morgan. I love her. I love when I get to see her at church and at the activities.

So we're excited to learn a little bit more. So , if you wouldn't mind, tell us a little bit about yourself, a little bit about Morgan, and whatever you'd like people to know. Well, as far as Morgan's diagnosis, she was diagnosed about three and a half years old. Mm-hmm. At that, she is 29 now.

Mm-hmm. Going on 30 some days she's more like 80, and some days she's more like two. So, you know, just she is a mess, but I just love her to pieces. So  when we, , when we started this,  we lived down in Alabama and she was diagnosed, I want to say in , around 1997. Okay.

And so that was at a time, you know, when they still really didn't know very much at all. Mm-hmm. And it took us seven different professionals. Wow. To get to that diagnosis. And when we finally did, it was a pediatric neurologist. Okay. And he told me you actually know more than I do at this point. And that was really scary to me.

But that  was what he came to us. He kind of went by this list of what it is. Morgan did not lose her words to start with, but she lost her meaningful language. She went from answering questions to just thelia going back and for a long time, like I said, again, she did not have It, it took a long time to get back to that meaningful language and she started talking in script after that, repeating a lot of, you know, so you, I'm sure you know the drill as, as far as me and my husband, we've been married for, Goodness going on 38 years now.

Wow. That's amazing. Yeah. Yeah. So thankful. So thankful that our older daughter's, 36. Okay. So she was, she came along about five years before Morgan. I always joke everybody, I told him I ask God for patience and flexibility, and he gave me Alison and Morgan. So that's, that's how that came down. So we had, just, like I said, we've been through a lot of learning.

And I'm sure, as you guys know, early on, the insurance, all those things between. Fighting those battles, trying to get, there was a lot of things that were not covered then.  It was pulling teeth to get speech or any type of services because you just had to prove it all the time. Yeah. So if I'm detouring, forgive me, I'm trying to Perfect.

What did services look like in the schools back then? Because I know Joe and I are former school teachers and we started back in what, 96, 97 ish and, and when we first started, and we were down in Florida, so names and stuff of what kind of classrooms were a little bit different, but they kind of just put all of the kids in one classroom.

Hello? Yes. Right. Whether they had physical disabilities, learning disabilities or whatnot. So what did things look like for Morgan since it was so new back then? It, it was, it was very much that situation. We very quickly got put in what you would call A C D C. Mm-hmm. Last here.  And, and what I will say from the very beginning our special needs teachers, , and , we had some wonderful teachers, very thankful for all of them.

But, you know, just the lack of understanding at that time because autism is such a different disability. A lot of your older special ed teachers, they were used to working with Downs and, and even, even that is a spectrum. So I'm not trying to. Right. You know, one thing I've really come to respect, every child is so different.

Yes. But they, it was just a different behavior and everything, so the teachers even looked at it differently. They didn't understand the sensory needs. They didn't understand. The  the communication being so difficult for our children, because I actually even had a, a special ed teacher think that Morgan was ignoring her or not listening, not following instructions.

Well, it really came down to. She wasn't understanding what they wanted. . You know, it was just, I might hear you, but I'm not, it's not processing, you know? Right, right. And so they would, sorry, the dog, the dog moved.

So you, your, your assistant. Okay. But You know, so that, that was a, a lot of, there was a lot of difficulty in the communication and them understanding those behavioral needs, why she might act out suddenly because of it just being overwhelming. Right. Whereas your other children, it might be more of a, just the developmental delay.

Mm-hmm. This was a whole different path. So, you know, I have to describe it to you, but they're just on it. You know, there's and they're learning. So splintered. So anyway. Yes. All in just that separated classroom. Yeah. Yeah. And like, you had to prove yourself to get out mm-hmm. Rather than them giving you, you know, giving you that least restrictive environment and letting you pull back when.

Yes. Yes. And that was what was different. You really had to fight again. And then it was almost like When, when we did get into a classroom, one of the hardest things we had was, I don't know why it was so hard, but helping them understand how we needed the same information on a different level. Mm-hmm.

It was like, if you couldn't get third grade information on a third grade, then you, they weren't gonna give you first grade. Right, right. You know what I'm saying? Like community, when they started You know, getting a little more in depth with things. I said, well, you know, I know that we can't go to that level, but can't we be teaching something, say on a kindergarten level or first grade about our fire department and our nurses and doctors and, you know, and give her a different level so that she would be working right.

You know, getting it, but getting a depth of information she could handle instead. What we got at times was just a piece of paper to color. Or something while every, and we got that over and over and, and I'm not, I'm not faulting the teachers in, in defense of those in the regular classroom, they weren't given the support, support they needed.

Right. I wouldn't expect someone to have 30 students and then coming with a child who seriously needs one-on-one or something to help them and and then be able to accommodate everyone. Right. I've never. I have never been for inclusion, for the sake of inclusion. Mm-hmm. Because I want Morgan where she was loved and understood, and I felt like she could learn a lot better in that type of environment than, you know, forcing her into the other because it wasn't fair to her or the other children.

Right. So that's where we are, you know? Yeah. So you guys had to Advocate. I, I would think and I'm speculating a little bit, I know that as Jack's mom, I tend to kind of maybe let him get away with a little more, or, you know, I might do more for him , and I think he's learned as he's gotten older, that, oh, mom's gonna just take care of this for me.

Whereas, , in, in school,  he will perform better sometimes for his teachers and for. The people at school. So you being , in those circumstances where they didn't know how far to push Morgan because they weren't quite sure what to do, you guys really, you and your husband really had to advocate for her.

And I'm guessing you probably had to do some, you know, soul searching as well. Like, okay, can she do this? Are we pushing too much? Or what was that? Yeah, what is the. What is that? It, it definitely, I always wanted to challenge her, but I will say I can only see her as her mother. Right. And I get exactly what you get.

And that's one thing, the things I would've done different. Yeah. Yeah. One, one of the many before her siblings. Alison saw Morgan differently and sometimes she challenged her more than I did, and so I was so protective during those times. If I could go back and maybe step back and say, okay, let's see how you handle this.

Yeah. You know, I feel like it would've served Morgan better. Yeah. And, and so , I tried really hard even teachers around her respecting them, like you said, they do act differently with other people. Mm-hmm.  Morgan will take advantage, say that century situation because I'm so keen on it, or I'm looking for what could be stopping Morgan.

Mm-hmm. Then other teacher might be in a group where she's trying to get it done and Morgan's got to. Pick it up herself a little bit and try to work. So yeah, there is a balance there. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Between accommodating and challenging. Yes. So,   we knew how smart mm-hmm she was.

You know, when you're around them and you just know when they're messing with you.

So we, we had that as well and trying to help someone, because it takes Morgan a long time to warm up mm-hmm. To people. Whereas Jack to me, just seems so, you know, hello, how are you doing? I even love how he's, you know, just looking for folks, right? Yeah. It's great. It's great. And so for us, because of her brand of autism, if you will somebody knew she's gonna shut down.

And one of the main reasons we do some of the online stuff, and she's seen her, I've got her out because Morgan and would be looking at herself and she's just a lot more open. You know, she's When you're seeing yourself on the screen. Yeah. You know, for some reason that's comfortable. So to her, she's performing for Morgan.

You know, so, oh, that's interesting. Ok. You get that. So she's up and she's singing and we're talking and we're a little more together, whereas if she was staring at people mm-hmm. It might shut her down again. So I want folks to see the Morgan that I see. Yeah. Right. And that's how we kind of started doing that.

So Again, I probably detoured, I'm sure. But that's, that's it. Just trying to it takes people a, a while to get to know your child. Yeah. And, and I'm sure you all seen this, even though I may not be an expert on autism, I'm an expert on my kid. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yes. Tammy, thank you so much for sharing all this.

Now Morgan, she's an adult now the age of 29. Yes. Mm-hmm. Who helps you? You as, as the mom still do. Do you, are you getting any, any help or advice how to continue to continue to parent an adult? Yeah. Oh, wow. It is, it is a patchwork. Of things, you know, a very much a patchwork and, and then as you know, routine is huge.

It's so important to them to know what's coming next. So I am, I am most of the dog and pony show. Mm-hmm. Still we have, once she did leave school services, which was at age 22, we just started scrambling, you know, trying to find, right now we have e, c, F, it was Employment and Community first. Mm-hmm.

Choices Program. And it was a, How do I say this nicely? It, it was sort of a nightmare to get on board. You know, a lot of anything you try to do, it's, it's forms and, and meetings and you know, it's just a lot to even get a very small amount of assistance. We'd done some, you know, we'd done some work, but it was, you know, obviously I was with her right.

Small joining, because again, back to that autism or personality, it was really hard to get an employee to step in and take my place mm-hmm. At some point. So we never got there. I was always her assistant. It, it was a great experience because it got her out, but that was part of filling that time.

Right. But, Once the pandemic happened that shut that down. Oh, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. And that's how we began Meals on Wheels, the little sandwich shop she worked for shut down. And we've been doing that once a week.  The only help that I have that comes, has come through E C F, and it's them paying for the respite, what's, it's not even really respite, but you know, like a personal assistant for a little bit.

And it's our friend Sarah. That we've known for a very long time. So those individuals, you kind of set them up with ECF so that they can become employed. Mm-hmm. And so they help. So it's a, again, it's a very small amount of time because they have to. Earn a living. Right. And so it's more a very small part-time thing where Sarah spends a couple of hours once a week with Morgan.

Right. And it depends on what you're able to work and pull together. Yeah. . You're the team,  so those were individuals and that's where you advocate for them making a decent in income so they can do it. But that's the little bit of help.

Mm-hmm. Agencies. I haven't been terribly excited about because it's only as good as the person you get as well. Right. Them coming on time when they say they're gonna come, them having a plan. What I found out, the ones who were supposed to take Morgan into the community and help her make choices and make change, a lot of times the one who came was not maybe not trained as fully as they should have been.

Oh yeah. And they would come and I mean, I'm just. Being, you know, real with you, right? Yeah. Inside. And, and, and they were nice people. Mm-hmm. But they were not take charge and let's work on this, this, and this, and let's see the things we need to do. They were asking me, what, what do you wanna do?   I just felt like I had to direct the whole program and I was hunting someone who would help me.

Right. And now I am still the 24 7. I mean, unless we get that, you know, that little sitter or something that comes a peer place obviously is just a, a godsend. Yeah. I mean, that's been wonderful for her. , for those who don't know about it, through our church, it's a day program that is four days a week and just with some loving and understanding teachers and just, it's amazing to me how many young people are there and the mix of personalities, and yet they still gel.

Yes. You know, that it, it's just, and that, you know, that's the Lord. I mean, I, that's the one thing I'll say from that end, from my faith, is that even though I don't know how it's gonna work out mm-hmm. I do my best and I step in every day and I know God's got it. Mm-hmm. Thankfully, you know? Yeah. That's how I have to approach it.

Mm-hmm. But that, that's where we are now. And then my mom and dad help when they can, but they're in their age, so I'm in that sandwich mode right now, you know? But, but they've been, A gift. They, they make a rotten, so that's the other side. Of course, that's what they're, that's part of their job description.

That, that's where we're at too. My, my parents are in their eighties as well and they love spending time with Jack. But it, they get tired quicker and, you know, so So , it's something that I'm very thankful that I have them to rely on, but I don't wanna have to rely on them. Exactly. And you have to kinda wean back too, as they get older and knowing what they are capable, you know, of doing really, because moms and dads won't say no when they need to sometimes.

Exactly. Exactly. Protecting that. But yes. So that, that's where I'm at, but it is still absolutely me. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And Rudy will retire soon and  the hope is , we're gonna pass that ball back and forth,  and, and be able to help each other. Yes. Tammy, I love that advice that you just gave.

It's probably the best parental advice out there ever. I, I step up every day. I do my best and I know that God's got this. Mm-hmm. I know, I hear that is fantastic. That, that, that's from lots of practice. Yes. So Do you have any bits of advice for other parents? And this could be from  either if they have a child on the spectrum, maybe it's a newer diagnosis.

Mm-hmm. Or if they don't have one.  How, I guess that's kind of two different questions. So lemme rephrase it. If advice for parents who maybe are just starting out and not sure what to do and then leading into. Advice for parents who don't have a child on the spectrum. Like maybe how they can teach their child to be sensitive to our kids or to even, you know, push them and challenge them in, in good, healthy ways.

So any kinda advice , in wisdom that you might have. I will say that parents are usually your best teachers. Mm-hmm. Other parents, so, you know, definitely reach out for the support. I know you've, I don't know if you've heard of autism, Tennessee. It's an older organization, been around a long time and, and they have parent reps there.

Sometimes it's not as easy to get people. Mm-hmm.  They're coming back from being hit by a tornado and all That's right. Years ago. Yes. So they really went through quite a transition. They're actually coming back to their office and when I say that, finding out the, you know, where to get your diagnosis mm-hmm.

They're helpful with that orientation and that part of it. But the best help that I have found has been other parents. Mm-hmm. And, you know, in  groups and things like that because somebody who's been there, Is the one who can tell you how to get there and what those pitfalls to avoid. Yeah. That's the one thing.

And then if it's another parent that you're comfortable with whose child does not have the diagnosis, I am just as open and honest and transparent as I can be. And just like we have a neighbor now, the little girl is just a doll. She's 11. Oh, I see. And she must pictures. Yes. Facebook. And she began to reach out,  and so I've made just , a concerted effort to get with her parents to always make sure they're comfortable. Mm-hmm. And , I've said more than what, please tell Sophia, ask me any questions she needs to ask because it's a very unusual disability. I said we are an open book. Mm-hmm. And so I want Sophia to ask, I want them to ask, I want, you know, that's, that's what I feel like is, is the best way just out front.

Yeah. And , sometimes I ride bikes with Sophia. Yeah. Morgan will start, you know, and then Morgan's done listen. And so Sophia still wants to play. That's right. Then I play and we talk,  we're right out there in the road, you talking about her and I said, you know,  sometimes Morgan's just what she says, you know, comes out, right, right.

But we're working on it. But I said, but that's Morgan. Mm-hmm. And so, you know, that's just how she is. And so it's finding that child and there are different child who are, you know, that just kind of pick that that's their gift. Mm-hmm. That they have to reach out and And I say for other parents, let them know to, to talk about volunteering at their school if they have any interest.

Yes. In volunteering as a peer or going into room because sometimes that reverse inclusion is even more powerful. Mm-hmm. They learn to come in and, and you just find certain kids that just have a gift for it. Yes. And so that's what I would encourage parents to see if that's something their kids are interested in.

So I love it. That's. Yeah, that's such great advice.  We've been incredibly blessed. We moved here from Southwest Florida, and I was terrified because Jack was going from a different school setting Oh, right. A more inclusive setting. And I was like, oh my gosh. I don't know. I don't know. And , God just opened doors and we've been so blessed.

So we've been very fortunate with,  that,  The kids have just loved on him very well, but I love your piece of advice is to not be afraid to act because it can be a little intimidating. You know, Jack's almost 17. He's a young man and he's tall, and Morgan's a grown woman. And so seeing an, an adult behaving differently or maybe coming up to you,  as a child, they, other children may not know how to approach that or why, why is this adult coming up to me and talking to me about.

You know, something random. So just educating and, and encouraging people like you said to ask questions I think is so fantastic. Yeah. We also had, back in the day, and I still have like some of my business cards as first know the, and if I hear, if somebody kinda ask or I get that reaction or if I get a reaction that's inappropriate uhhuh from a child, a parent, 

cuz that's been more so where I would, yeah. Yeah. You know, two things. Either they would be rude or didn't, didn't understand what was going on, or a parent would just be shushing their child. I would reach out and just hand a card. I love that Morgan's on the autism spectrum. If you ever wanna know more about it,  here's, you know, that sounds to learn because that might not be the place.

 But I had a situation bullying, for lack of a better word, where Morgan, you know, she was singing and doing her thing, you know, or whatever. She was walking and these kids started making fun of her. Oh. And laughing at her. Right. That, that's been thankfully rare. But  the parent was allowing this to happen.

And just wasn't saying anything. And so so that's when I stopped and I said Here, I said that, I'm sure your children don't know, but my daughter's on the autism spectrum. If you wanna teach them more about it, you can go to this site , and learn a little more. You can call us. Yeah. And so then the parent kind of went, turn white for a minute, you know?

Yeah. But it, but you know, it was a moment, it was a teachable moment. And once I got past getting upset, And started thinking of everything as an opportunity to teach. Yeah. Cause that's what started us anyway, you know, when people misunderstood, when they thought she was just being unruly and we weren't being a good parent.

That's what made me wanna educate people. Yes. Yes. I love that.  A lot of times I I have to pray that God will shut my mouth instead of asking him to give me the words. So handing somebody a card and saying, here, check this out, would be a great way for me to be obedient to the Holy Spirit and shutting my mouth, because there's probably a few other things I would wanna say about making fun of my kid.

So I've been there. I can also tell you the times that I should have passed out a car, right? Yes. Oh my goodness. I was car carrying Morgan one time  and her legs were down past my knees, Uhhuh, but we were in the hardware store and so, you know, I was keeping her safe in the line and this lady under her breath, but wanted me to hear it.

Look at that woman carrying that child and she ought to be walking. And I just leaned up to her. I said, this child has autism. Mm. And if you want, you know, and this, it's like you just, what do you say to somebody? Some people aren't teachable, but we try. Right, right. Absolutely. But you know, you have those moments and, and they are again, what always go back into that mode.

And if you just can't even speak. You can hand that card. Yes.  I'm making a note of that now. I'm gonna make some cards so I can pass. I'm gonna give him a whole pocket full. Yeah. So I mean, we've all been there and that is because you never know when God's gonna open up their life and present them with a family member.

For sure.  I remember when I thought I knew everything and. You know, I would see a child acting up in a store before I had a child on the spectrum. Mm-hmm. And now I go, Ooh, maybe, you know, there might be a little more to the story there. Yes. It definitely has made me a little more empathetic, I empathetic towards people because yeah, we are often quick to judge, so, yeah.

Yeah. Very most so. Yep. Tammy, as Jack, our son is, is going to be 18. He's right around the corner from it's years in year. He'll be 18. I know. It's like what Yeah. Say years. But you know what, what is  advice you can  give us? Mm-hmm. Having a son that's about to become an adult. Right, right.

From a legal point of view, from a parental point of view, what should we be aware of? I would definitely look, and, and again, for every child it's different. And I'm sure you've heard about conservatorships or guardianships and  if you're looking at a lawyer, a special needs lawyer is your be, you know, so they have an understanding of that or that specialty, if you will.

And and.  You want them to have as much, right. You don't wanna take away their rights. Right. But you also wanna protect them. Mm-hmm. And so as they turn that, whatever, whatever guidance you think they still need, they need to be under your protection so they can't sign a contract or, you know, so anyone can't just walk up to them and.

Hand them a piece of paper and get them in all kind of trouble, right? Absolutely. There are people out there, so, so you want to be looking at that. , the Tennessee Disability Coalition is located in East Nashville and they are one that you might be able to get with them and tell 'em you've got some of these questions, they might be able to direct you to the appropriate resources.

Awesome. And but like I said, again, I would say a special needs attorney so that you can understand the levels. Of Guardian. We have a Rudy and I have a cos conservatorship over Morgan. Okay. And we had to go to the court to do that. We had her with us and basically , in her case, there was no question that we would be making all decisions.

Right? But for some,  things can change as they change. So, but. Medically you wanna protect them. And then I had mentioned when y'all had your your talk, you know, a few weeks ago where I talked about at 18, they took Morgan's website where I went to Vanderbilt and I could go, I got, and I could not get on the site Mm.

The day of her birthday and we were even searching. So you definitely wanna have that ready to roll. You're not doing it, but you've gotta be ready to go make those transitions. Right before they turn eight 18 and be ready. And then  you come before a judge and they Okay. You know, do, yeah. And then you become their, like again, their conservator, their, their guardian.

 There are people who do rights and advocacy. Mm-hmm. And I think you do what's best for your family. You're gonna have some very strong advocates who think, oh no, don't take this way and don't take that away because they're protecting the individual with a disability. Yes, but, but nobody knows your child better than you do, and you know his vulnerability.

So regardless of what they tell you, you're gonna be the one that's there for him. Yeah. And so you make those decisions and just, it's just like getting on the interstate. If you miss a turn. You can turn back around and undo. Yeah. So, you know, it's do what's best for your family.  How soon should a parent start looking into that before their child's 18th birthday?

Well you're in that you're coming up. And I think cause of now everything with the pandemic and getting in touch with people and how things have changed and lawyers offices knowing their backlog maybe. Yeah. Or whatever you wanna know, you can reach people. So even if it's setting up that, you know, Where do you get the information?

And I would say now even, even going through our church or maybe the BAB Center mm-hmm. And asking if they know those specialty, I'm just, you know, cause I didn't have that or didn't know that at the time.  I used Cindy Gardner. It was special needs law center I think. And there was a time when it was not easy to get in touch with it, you know, once everything was done because now I wanna go back and do some, like an addendum or you know, changes as mor as the people Morgan knows changes.

Yes. Cause we have wisdom, trust and Pat, you know, all of that. And so you definitely wanna get someone that is easy to contact. Yeah. , because you're gonna have to have your medical when you get ready. All this medical records lined up that. You know, his disability and you know, and what all's involved so that when you stand in front of a judge,  we took Morgan with us.

And it was in Sumner County and we had to wait forever. We were like on the docket and they had her outside. And just not knowing what people understand, you want them to me, you want them to see them, right. And understand who it is we're talking about, but it's sometimes it's really difficult for them to wait.

So you wanna all that stuff to have it set up. You're not too early to be looking for that person. Okay. Yes. It's my bottom answer. That's good advice. Yeah. You're like a gold mine. I know. I dunno. I'm still, like I said, at, at this point still learning just like the Medicare and all that. I'm at that wonderful age now, you know?

And, and like And did they come to it after you? So there's a lot of stuff I'm learning just by, hey, it happened to me. Yeah. So if there's anything, y'all ever have a question and I've got something I can get, you know, I'm happy to. Thank you. Thank you. So now I wanna talk a little bit about you specifically and what you're doing with Morgan.

So I know you have a book, mm-hmm.  You have a music background and you have some at least one, maybe two or more Facebook groups that you share some of your experiences with Morgan, some of your adventures and. Just kind of life in a day of Morgan that I love. So I'd love for you to talk about some of those things that you're doing.

Or Okay. Know the Hope, which is know the hope.com. And I think I've, I don't, I've got a few, whatever, it's tammy vice.com. But first of all, I'm a songwriter, so I've been doing all that for years.  So my background is  in music and, and I'm just a fan of the arts when it comes to education and what I mean, you know, this words, you know, it's like, even though as a writer, words were my strength, Words alone were not helpful.

And so words are just a small part of communication and what the arts do or your music and your, you know, your visual arts and all this, they just, they work together with all of the senses and they help you reach your child. So that's my. Like I said, my background and know the hope. It is not a nonprofit, although it's been very non-profitable.

Also. It's it's just a small company that our family put together. And  the whole origin of it was what I said earlier, educating community,  I always say it's Showing parents possibilities, what our  children are capable of, encouraging them, and then helping the community understand our children's abilities.

That's where that came from. And  as a songwriter, I've, I've done, you know, music, I have a few CDs. If you don't remember what they are, they're like little coasters. Yeah, right. I know. Might have some young parents who who have no idea what a CD is Exactly. They're like a yes.

But but yeah, so that's. You know, so I've done the music, but my main obviously it's a lot of Christian music and it is family music and a lot of the inspiration came from Morgan and just again, just those stories and everything. So that, lemme see. That is know the hope. As far as Facebook, the way we come about  with Morgan doing the story time once a week, we do it at nine 9:00 AM central Tammy Vice is just my personal page.

And then we do that Morgan and Mom or know the hope. Tammy and Morgan. I was like, I don't know what all but just as cuz the music will advertise. You have some of that through, but just our personal page is lots of adventures of Morgan. You will see her so much, but I think that Facebook thinks she's me.

Because you don't, you don't ever see me. I try really hard, but but it, it's all been, all of that has been in the, in the quest to help people understand Morgan on a more personal level and understand others with autism. Sort of just by seeing her hearing her and the reading started during the pandemic when we were trying to create a routine.

Okay. And. And that was the whole beginning of it. It's like Morgan thrives on the calendar and numbers and all of those things. So she knew on Tuesday this was what we were gonna be doing. Sunday was church. You know, Monday we have a certain day we go to my mom and dad's. But it when there was for any of us, no.

Understanding of what yesterday, or today or tomorrow was that that kept our calendar going. That's how it began. So we've probably doing it a few years now. Okay. We started during the pandemic and we just continued. I love it. Yeah. And Mills on Wheels , we began that when we lost her job because that, that got her out there greeting and it just had some real helpful things for her.

So, so that's one of the things that we do.  We started songwriting together to develop her language skills because she just has really interesting way of phrasing things.  And so I would sit down with her and I would pick whatever she wanted to do.

Or whatever she wanted to talk about in whatever words I could get from her or phrases when we were talking about that subject, I wrote 'em down and that's how we built the song. Before we get to the song part, I'll show you the book. Is that.

I'm trying to stay with the program, but as you can tell, I'm more ADHD than anybody. That mom thing, and also call it Mom, you never know where I'm gonna, you know, start off. Okay. This is, this is 50 Blue Mondays, and if you look at the cover, the painting on the cover, it has a rose that I painted. And I'm gonna, I'll bring you one of these Sunday if y'all are there.

Yeah. And I'd just like to give, gift it to you so you can get a better feel for what's in it. Yeah. And so we do little side by side paintings. We do these on our window each month. So you'll see that on Facebook, or 52 Blue Mondays. One of those things where we paint a scene and in order to teach Morgan just simple art Yeah.

And shapes and things. I would draw and then she'd follow me on her side of the window. So this was our first painting. And that's right. Came, but it's, so I wanted it to be her work. Yeah. But you know, in other words, the handover hand, I'm doing it and she's doing it, but it still becomes her own.

Absolutely. So that's how, yeah. So that's how we did that. And then just her funny way of, you know, how they process things and they don't quite hear 'em the way we say 'em. Great.  But we went through, there's a lot of different quotes, but just to do the very first one on our, on our way to school last week, Morgan says, I need a missile.

So I've got a picture of a rocket ship because I have no idea what she's talking about. And so I said, mom, you need a what? Morgan need a missile. Tired of school, wanna go home with mom? So she wanted a dismissal. Oh. But  so to this day, you know, miss Laura, when I'm calling Morgan would like a missile.

I love it.  So,  she just got lots of little, the way she says things, just little instances and just funny, funny stuff. But just our reality, you know how you're always trying to play, what is it? I say we play. Pictionary and all kind trying to figure out what is she saying, charades, it's our life.

So that's that. And it was written, like I said, a few years back and part of the proceeds at that time went to Autism Tennessee, but that's again, been years ago. But this can still be got at her bookshop, Morgan Vice and Bookshop like print on demand. And I think on, I think on that Facebook page, 52 Blue Minds, there is a link Okay.

To that. So it can still be got, but again, that was just our way again, showing Morgan and showing our life and, and even now, like some of the things she's painted, I don't have these available online, but they're kind of what do you say? Just like print word of mouth. Yes. Where she painted this a poor painting.

We did it together. And she's got O C D and the stick. You know, she can't stand the sticky stuff and all that. And centuries uhhuh. So I told her sometimes we have to make a mess to create something beautiful. Right. Oh, that was the lesson behind this. And then a little angel where she said, it's probably harder to see this one, but she painted that a little.

Those are little cards, like little, these are note cards. Yeah, they're little blank note cards that she's done. Little packs and kinda again, word of mouth friends.  I'm a mom, but I'm not a great marketer. I've never figured all that in out, so a lot of times I won't have stuff online cause it's like, oh no, I can't.

If I can ever figure, figure out how to do it systematically and get a good one. Otherwise, a lot of times it's just word of mouth. Yes. But put all, I'm sorry, we're gonna put all this content information in the show notes so that people can find you. So Okay. Hopefully you'll have lots of orders for those.

I love the angel card. I think that's, so thank. So thank you. Yeah. And that came from Angel unaware. Or just like, I'll write a song. We, I try to do things in a theme where if I'm working on something and then, you know, that, but whatever includes her just helps her learn about different things. So that's our art.

And if, if you wanna hear a song, I don't know how her time is, but if you wanna hear a song, I can do you one that we did together. I would love that. I would love that. Mm-hmm.  Morgan is a woman who loves to shop and order things from the brown truck. Oh, the brown truck. I love that. Yes. So that is, that's where this one came from.

Okay. And, and like I said, what I did was ,  sat down with her. Like I said, I would listen to words and phrases and as I do three Borderless Arts, Tennessee. I'm a songwriter that works with them and sometimes when they do a workshop in schools or whatever, then I'll go Les Cur and I will do that together as a team.

And, and so working with individual disabilities so that they get to enjoy the artist. So  just clarifying that I am not a visual artist, even though Morgan and I draw, , I don't like to tell you that I can do that. We just be thankful. Okay, so this is her waiting on a brown truck.

That's where this came from. Okay. And tell me if you have trouble hearing it or gimme a thumb if we're okay.

Looking out my window, listening door, knock, knock on my door, checking on my email to see what's in

down

hold number eight. Waiting on a

something.

Wait

is a good day.

What

a surprise. I. So excited. I know it's sharp up those scissors. So

you bring me something to up and up with the big blacks. Smile, Ben.

Always wishful. I know. I've got it for just dreaming. Bitch it showing up. Mix. And then she'll shake her. You shake her here. Okay. Trying to teach her some rhythm

with a big black.

That's it. Amazing. Thank you so much. Thank. We're gonna, we're gonna send this out to the, the brown truck people and get you some, some royalties from that. We'll take it, we'll take it. That one. Cause that one is really, it's kinda not published, it's just our thing. A lot of the music that I've done myself, you know, old stuff I have.

But Morgan and I, I'm still trying to find a way, the things that we do together to get our product to that because cuz she's a lot of fun. Yes. But that's, that's how we've grown it. You know, Uhhuh just. I'll make a phone call, Tammy, and I'll get you on stage at Tootsie's here next weekend that we can scare 'em all.

 That's one thing that I love bringing her in with me to sing now. You know, and just, again, it's, it's having to make it work for her. I tell 'em we call her Morgan Elvis vice cuz you never know when she's gonna be ready to leave the building. So  I have to bring it in where she can come with me, do her thing when she's done, you know, I'll let her stay a little bit.

But, but it, it's been great to, it's helped her kinda reach out, be apart, . Her favorite thing in the world is the circus. So of course we've written songs about the circus, but while we're singing the song, she's singing and she's talking to me. Oh, okay. So it's, it's different every time and it's just, and talk about trusting the Lord.

Mm-hmm. That is where, you know, I say that funny and not funny. He has kept me like on my heels and my knees, you know, when I'm doing this, I know that if he doesn't direct it, it's not gonna happen. You know, and it's, it's a good thing to learn that it really puts you in that space of, okay, God, I'm just waiting on you.

Yeah, absolutely. Oh, Tammy, this has been so wonderful. I am so glad that you took time out to do this and  , like I said, we get to see Morgan in passing and And I just, I adore her. And just learning a little bit more about her and what your journey has been like. You know, like our, our tagline is, our stories are, are different yet familiar.

Okay. And we've just got to love on our children where they're at and just be a support for each other. So, We really appreciate you taking the time for us today. We wanna thank you so much for being a champion of autism because you have to be the voice for Morgan. So what  we're gonna do is for all of our listeners, we're gonna make sure that we have all of the places that they can find you listed in the show notes here.

So we're gonna wrap up our, our interview with you here today. And you had said that it was, know the hope.com was one of the main ones, correct? Yeah, that's a, that's a website. Okay. So you can go to that. But then a lot of what we do, just current stuff is on Facebook. You know how we're just Okay, great.

And we'll have all that listed out in the show notes so people can find you and And  hear , more songs that you do, and learn more about Morgan and, and your journey with her. So yeah, you are an absolute rockstar. Oration.

I. Yeah. So we just wanna thank everyone for joining us on this episode of Champions of Autism. If you'd like to hear more about champions of Autism, the community, we'd like you to head on over to champions of autism.com, and you can also find us on Facebook. So please don't forget to subscribe on your favorite podcast app.

And until next time, we are Joe and Stacy, and this is Champions of Autism. Whoop, whoop.