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Against All Odds Podcast, The Less than 1% Chance with Maria Aponte
Maria highlights stories of people that have been the "less than 1% chance" and have come out of their situations thriving and seeing life as happening FOR them and not TO them! Inspiring and empowering stories that will show you that against all odds you can make it through anything!
Against All Odds Podcast, The Less than 1% Chance with Maria Aponte
Choose Your Family: Healing By Creating The Community You Needed with Catalina Popoveniuc
What if the “normal” you were taught to accept was actually the harm you had to heal? Maria sits down with Catalina, a psychotherapist and survivor of narcissistic abuse, for a candid conversation about recognizing toxic patterns, choosing safety, and building the kind of community that helps people move from surviving to truly living. Catalina grew up under the weight of control and projection and later found herself repeating those dynamics in friendships, work, and love. The turning point came through learning—books that named the patterns, language that clarified the damage, and practices that made life feel safe again.
We trace the steps from awareness to action: how to spot early red flags like love-bombing and shifting goalposts, how to set boundaries without apology, and why reducing contact can be an act of profound self-respect. Catalina shares the unexpected way she found her public voice in English before Romanian, revealing how context can unlock expression for survivors who were told to stay small. Along the way, Maria opens up about her own against-all-odds moments—sexual assault, cancer, and parenting through mental health crises—and how sharing that story created connection where shame once lived.
At the heart of this conversation is Alive In Her, the global movement Catalina founded to offer what many of us needed: a village that validates, supports, and equips. It’s bigger than narcissism recovery; it’s about belonging, resilience, and choosing your family with intention. Expect practical tools for holiday triggers and difficult relatives, gentle scripts for hard conversations, and encouragement to create what you can’t find—whether that’s a Facebook group, a podcast, or the purple-covered memoir on your vision board. If you’re ready to replace isolation with community and guesswork with grounded steps, press play and join us. If this conversation resonates, subscribe, share with a friend who needs it, and leave a review to help others find the show.
Connect with Catalina:
Website: https://catalinapopoveniuc.com/
Facebook: Psychotherapist Cătălina Popoveniuc
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Welcome back to the Against All Odds, the Less than 1% Chance podcast with your host, Maria Aponte, where we will hear stories of incredible people thriving against all odds. And my hope is that we can all see how life is always happening for us, even when we are the less than 1% chance.
SPEAKER_02:Hey, hey, welcome back to Against All Odds, the Less than 1% Chance podcast with your host, Maria Aponte. This is my first Romanian guest. I'm so excited. This is completely going worldwide, and it just makes me so, I don't know, like I can't believe it. So let me introduce you to Catalina. She is a survivor of narcissism. Um she is a psychotherapist, a speaker, and founder of hashtag AliveInHer GlobalMovement. Please welcome Catalina to Against All Odds. Thank you for joining us. And hello from Romania. Yes, oh my gosh, it's so cool. So give us a little bit of background. What is your Against All Odds story? And then how did you get to where you are today?
SPEAKER_00:Well, as you said, I was uh born and raised in a narcissistic, so so it was the family you were born into.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Oh my gosh. So give us a little bit of the things that you maybe experienced that maybe sometimes people don't understand exactly what that is.
SPEAKER_00:Well, I was raised by two females who are very narcissistist, my mother and my grandmother. So it was quite a lot, quite a story. And after that, of course, I chose only narcissistic, narcissistic friends, and so on. So I chose only narcissistic people around me. Even though I had a business and I chose people I needed to work with, of course, I chose exactly like this. Because that's all I knew.
SPEAKER_02:Exactly. Yeah. So when you know that's just who you gravitate towards, it tends to be those people until I I feel like maybe until you start healing it and start seeing those red flags, right?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and for me that was the norm. I didn't even know that it was toxic. Of course, back then I didn't even know it was narcissist. For me, that was the norm.
SPEAKER_02:Oh my gosh, that's yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so after that, of course, during my life, everything went, let's say, wrong. Yeah. Yeah. Because of course I interacted only with the narcissistic.
SPEAKER_02:And what kind of behaviors would they show you?
SPEAKER_00:Well, I chose all narcissistic people to make sure I tried them all. In my family, they were malignant, of course.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah. And so what help what helped you open your eyes to this beh these behaviors, and so that you could move away maybe from that behavior?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. Of course, back then nobody knew about narcissists or nobody talked about this. Let's say, especially Romania, maybe in other countries.
SPEAKER_02:It's very new.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah. So I didn't know they were narcissist, but after that I read books and so on, and of course I found out and I realized uh the impact they had on me. And mental health and so on.
SPEAKER_02:And how did you pull yourself away from that?
SPEAKER_00:Well, and now I have many contact with my family.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:So in the present time I'm safe, let's say. Good. Yeah, yeah. And of course, now I don't interact with narcissistic people. And if I see that they are narcissistic, of course, I go away.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, absolutely. So then how did you then start to I'm guessing when you found hashtag alive in her, it was more healing, right? Because give us a little bit of background of what we have.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, actually, it was yeah, it was that healthy family I didn't have. And of course, that have a healthy family, that healthy village I needed. Yeah, so I created it.
SPEAKER_02:When we don't have that, we create what we need in our lives. I yeah, I could totally understand that.
SPEAKER_00:It's like town family, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. And this time it can be a healthy family, of course.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, absolutely. So, what do you do? Is this like a Facebook group? Is it yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_00:Yes, I have a Facebook group, and I have just launched this global movement, and I have a Facebook group, and there are a lot of people support each other, and they offer something. One can offer a virtual hug, another a virtual coffee, another one offer something, and so on. It's like a big family and it's global, so and it's growing, of course.
SPEAKER_02:Oh, I love that. That's so amazing. Yeah, I'll definitely put all the information in the show notes so that people are able to join. Is it only women or is it well uh well, men are welcome too. Well, men are welcome too. That's good.
SPEAKER_00:They need support too.
SPEAKER_02:Excellent, yes, absolutely. I agree. And then what criteria is it people that have only dealt with narcissism?
SPEAKER_00:No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Well, actually, it started like this because as a therapist I work with survivors of narcissists, but now it's not only about narcissists.
SPEAKER_02:Excellent, that's amazing. And then how long have you been creating this movement?
SPEAKER_00:How long has well this movement uh actually only one month?
SPEAKER_02:Oh my gosh, that's so amazing!
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, it's so it's a very beginning.
SPEAKER_02:Very beginning. Oh, so I hope that with this it can continue to grow. I'm yeah, so excited. So, why alive in her?
SPEAKER_00:Alive in her, yeah. Well, uh, we know that people survive, not live, a lot of us, and uh that is why alive in her, because you all have that fire and that desire to live, to truly live, not just survive. We all have it inside of us, and it's very important to support each other so we can discover it, and we can live, we can connect with our children and so on, and just live the life and be happy about it.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, that's beautiful. And what other things would you like to highlight about what you want to create in this movement?
SPEAKER_00:Well, I want to create uh a place where uh women do not feel alone because or let's say people, men and women, yeah, because I know what it means to feel alone and to have no one to ask for help, or to to believe you have no one to ask for help, and that is why I believe it's so important to have a big village where we can ask for help, we can receive help, we can understand that it's not our fault for the things that happen in our lives, yeah, like a narcissistic or so on, and that there are people that went through the same things, which is very important.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, absolutely.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so that's the what the community does. It helps us realize that we are not alone, and if we need help, we can ask for help.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, that's honestly why I want to make sure that we highlight stories because I feel like when I was dealing with my own against all odds story, I was sexually assaulted when I was 16, I had cancer at 18. Like I just felt by myself. Like no one else would understand why what I was going through. And when my daughter, my oldest daughter, was dealing with mental health issues, I felt by myself. So when she was old enough to give me permission to speak publicly on social media about the struggles that we went through, I started to speak about it and so many times. Number one, I got criticized, obviously, because there's always the two things. But on the other end, I had so many private messages from parents that were just like, Oh my gosh, thank you so much for speaking up about this. Yeah, because it they're dealing with their child that is struggling with mental health, and so I was doing anything and everything that I could. I was getting involved in community groups and things that honestly, if I wouldn't have been vocal about it, I wouldn't have known that these things existed. So the fact that I was able to share and help others to the process because in so many of these, it's I started to experience that. I started to see that by sharing our story and sharing my story, more people would be feel more open, yeah, more open and feel more brave to reach out and say, Hey, I'm also experiencing this. Thank you because I don't feel alone anymore.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and it happened to me too. And thank you for sharing it.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah. So it just it became something that I love that this is what you're doing, that you're creating this space. This is my creation of this spaces, the podcast that we can highlight stories that of people that have really gone through difficult things and felt alone in so much of it, and then can completely find a family, find a community that uplifts them and shows shows a light of something different, yeah, yeah, and helps them thrive. Yeah, absolutely. Because I feel like we we're so stuck in that darkness, and when we're stuck in that darkness, it's so hard to see the light.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah. And we are sure that nobody is there for us, and we are all alone, and oh, but nobody can help me, and so on. Yeah, and we remain in that depression, anxiety, panic attacks, and so on.
SPEAKER_02:Yes, absolutely.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and we don't we don't ask for help, so uh you know being in such a community because we don't know, we don't know to ask for help, yeah, and we are sure that nobody would understand us and nobody would help us and so on. And usually, as you said, usually people blame us. Oh, why did you stay in that relationship and so on? Oh, why didn't you leave sooner? Yeah, yeah, so yeah, so that is why it's so important to be in a community who understands you, doesn't blame you, doesn't judge you, and just supports you, and of course, with people who let's say speak the same language, yes, absolutely.
SPEAKER_02:I yeah, I think that that's another thing. You feel like, well, how is it that this continued to happen and you're re-victimizing the victim of the situation? So it's so beautiful to have a community that say, no, no, we understand, we're here, we're here for support. So I love that's what you're creating with hashtag alive in her and honestly commend you for coming out of that and saying, Well, no, I want to create something positive out of the negativity that I went through.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, and something positive for uh women and the place where they can cry if they feel like it, or they can share a joy or uh an achievement or whatever. Yeah, so all of us need to this place, yeah. Absolutely, let's say, yeah, yeah. So actually it was from my need.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, yeah, we create what we need. I I think that's so beautiful that we're able to say, Well, this is what I needed, so I don't know where there is something like this.
SPEAKER_00:So yeah, I don't know where to find it. So okay, let me do it.
SPEAKER_02:So let me do it myself. I love that. That's I think that's it's so funny because I feel like that is something that when we go through difficult things, we just tend to just need that as human beings, we need community, right? We we cannot survive on yeah, and do you need human connection, yes. And so when all the connection that you've had has not been the best, we look for that outside of us. And sometimes when we're unhealed and when we don't, we look continue to find the same type of connection, and we're like, no, until we're like, that's it, that's enough, I can't do this anymore. We are able to pull out and heal ourselves so that we can find the correct people for our lives, yeah, and healthy people.
SPEAKER_00:And this time with this community, we can we can choose our people, we can choose our family. Back then we didn't exactly have much else. So yeah, we couldn't choose our family, but now we can.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, that's so beautiful. I love that.
SPEAKER_00:So so somehow maybe we heal a part of us from yeah, from the past.
SPEAKER_02:That's that is that's perfect, yeah, because I feel like there's things, and it and I think that at that point you can also encourage each other to to go past that comfort zone and do things that you probably didn't think you were able to do. Maybe it's you're there to help encourage someone that is still dealing with that narcissistic family member, and you teach them how to put healthy boundaries and or narcissistic or whatever.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, especially because the holidays are coming and people are going for Christmas with their family so young.
SPEAKER_02:And you're like, oh gosh, but no, it's important for us to learn from those people that have been able to achieve those healthy boundaries or whatever it is that you've experienced. And so I love that you can now go from creating or from experiencing it to the light. Yes, it's so beautiful. I love it so much. So, what do you feel are some of the limiting beliefs that you had to overcome in order to get to where you are today and maybe who what you want others to to understand that they can overcome, let's say, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Well, in my case, uh, of course, I was told that I'm a bad child with no heart. Of course, that became that I'm a bad adult with no heart, and we would translate it in being with no empathy, let's say. And actually, today now that I have a lot of empathy and the person therapist, I use it a lot, so yeah, it was definitely not true that I have no empathy and I'm a bad child.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, it's funny how I was talking to somebody yesterday, and I'm like, a lot of the times when these people want to make us believe that want to make us it's basically mirroring whatever is inside of them, yeah. So they want to excuse their own behavior and project it to somebody else that is innocent, that doesn't deserve that kind of behavior.
SPEAKER_00:Of course, and in the same time to control us, yeah, because if we know about ourselves, we are worthless and so on, they can control us, yeah. So in my case, it was that I have no empathy, I'm a bad child, I'm worthless, um, and I will not do anything in life, of course, and of course, that of course I didn't have a voice, yeah. So that wasn't a negative belief, it was uh a fact that I had no voice.
SPEAKER_02:Yeah, absolutely. And now it's beautiful because you're a therapist and you help people and you have empathy.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's funny? I uh I speak very easily in English, so in English I have a voice, but when I speak in Romanian in my native language, it's it's quite hard.
SPEAKER_02:Really?
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah. Even though it's my native language, it's very interesting. It's like I didn't have a voice in Romanian language, and I was told I don't need to have a voice, and I'm not allowed to have a voice. But it's like in English, nobody told me this using English language. Nobody told me you don't have a voice in English. So that is why it's very easy for me. But in Romanian, it's uh yeah, yeah, and it's the same when I have to write something for an article for a magazine or something. I write it very easily in English, but in Romanian uh it's very difficult to find my words.
SPEAKER_02:Wow. So that's thankfully, now there's translating apps everywhere, so you should write everything in English and translate it.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. My language. Yeah, you're right.
SPEAKER_02:With your with your authoritative voice in English, yeah, yeah, you translate it to Romanian, and then you can just fix whatever you know the mistakes are.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's very interesting. And when I realized I was, oh my god.
SPEAKER_02:Wow. So do is your practice in English or in both, both. Both. Okay. Yeah. That's so interesting.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. Yeah, and when I realize it, oh, and I'm a speaker and I go to conferences, and of course, I speak and so on, and it's very easy to speak in English. And in Romanian, I never went to a conference. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, and I am a speaker. I uh talk to every conference, but everything is in English.
SPEAKER_02:Oh my gosh, that's so interesting.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, yeah, it happened like that, and uh yeah, I speak very easily there.
unknown:Huh.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, but actually, I don't see myself in talking to a Romanian conference, let's say. Wow. So something there, uh I still maybe I still don't have the voice in my native language.
SPEAKER_02:So they're still we're ever working on ourselves. Yeah, yeah, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:But yeah, but in English, I know that my voice matters. I know that uh we all have a voice inside of us and so on.
SPEAKER_02:It makes sense, right? And yeah, yeah, yeah. If you step back and you look at it, it makes sense, but it's so interesting to hear.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and when I realized it was oh mind-blowing.
SPEAKER_02:Wow, yeah, absolutely. And wow, okay. I'm I that's that is something that I have never even thought about, but it makes sense, it definitely makes sense.
SPEAKER_00:But I never thought about it either, but when I realized the difference, after that I realized it, oh interesting.
SPEAKER_02:That's so cool. So, how long have you been a speaker?
SPEAKER_00:Well, I'm a speaker for a few years and I like uh doing that, but as I said, only in English, only in English, yeah.
SPEAKER_02:So that's important. So do you speak worldwide or yeah, because everything is online now? Yeah, oh okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:So all the conferences are online, and I can speak to conferences around the globe. That's awesome.
SPEAKER_02:I love it so much. So do you have any daily habits or rituals that have helped you get to the level of success that you are?
SPEAKER_00:Well, I like reading, and reading is what helped me. So I have a lot of books.
SPEAKER_02:Yes, I love it, I love it so much.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so actually the books saved me because I yeah, I bought a lot, I read a lot, and so on. So my entire life read a lot of books, and yeah, they saved me for sure.
SPEAKER_02:So when as you grew up reading books, yeah, what kind of books were all kinds of books because I read all the time. Yeah, yeah, that's awesome. I loved to read so much. I would I remember when I was probably like maybe twelve, and I was reading this love story. Series that was for like preteens, it was nothing crazy. But I would start a book and try to finish it the same night. And my mom one time wakes up at like two o'clock in the morning and opens the door, and she's like, What are you doing? You're supposed to be sleeping, and I'm like reading a book, and so it's so funny that now. So now I don't have time to sit down and read, but I listen to books all day long. I could be listening in right before I got on with you. I was listening to a book as I was like getting everything ready, and it's literally my favorite thing, it transports me to another world, and I absolutely love it. So I agree.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, I like reading more than listening to books, and I read a lot of books overnight too because during the day the members of my family were talking and talking and talking and talking, so I couldn't concentrate. But tonight it was finally quiet and I could read the books.
SPEAKER_02:That's awesome. Yeah, I love to read, I just don't have time. I work outside of the house, I'm driving, I have kids that want to ride somewhere. So when I don't have time to sit down and read, it it's gets frustrating. So I listen because then I still can go somewhere.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, when I was a child and a teenager, I read the the end of the book first, and after that, I read the book. Yeah, because I really, really, really needed to know how that book ends.
SPEAKER_02:Oh my god, really? That's so interesting.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, and after that, I now I don't do this anymore. But but at that point, it was no, I couldn't read it otherwise. No, I needed, I really needed to know uh the end.
SPEAKER_02:That's so funny. I'm actually the complete opposite. I don't I don't want spoilers. Spoilers, I am not, and that just doesn't work for me. I want to be surprised, I want to feel all the things, I wanna cry, I want to laugh, love being able to be on that journey uh and growth journey. Like even with like fan, like I like romanticies, romantic fantasy books, and even with them, you see the growth of the character, and you're like, oh my gosh. And then I have a friend at work that that we talk about the books that we're reading, and she's like, Oh, I can't stand her. And I'm almost like, she's like 18, she doesn't know anything. You have to like look like get into the perspective of the character, and she's a baby, and so yeah, so I can lose myself in a book so easily. It's the best, absolutely agree. And maybe one day we'll write the book that is on my vision board is to write a book, yes, and I think it'll be part memoir and yeah, it'll be exactly the same for me. The things that I that I feel like I've experienced that are against all odds. So maybe that even yeah, maybe even the title.
SPEAKER_00:So you already have the title.
SPEAKER_02:That was the difficult part. I have the title, and it's gonna be purple. I don't know. I don't know. Oh yeah, okay. My favorite color is purple if you can't tell. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:Yeah, so so maybe we will write a book.
SPEAKER_02:Maybe we will write a book. I agree.
SPEAKER_00:It's yeah, and the in there is future, not in 10 years.
SPEAKER_02:Not in not in 10 years, no. I'm gonna that is something that I have on my vision board, so it'll be soon. I will start soon, and so I hope that you that's my intention too. Yes, we'll hold each other accountable. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_00:No pressure, no pressure at all.
SPEAKER_02:Oh my gosh. Is Carolina, is there anything else that you would like to share with our listeners today? No, no, we're good.
SPEAKER_00:All right, I'm sure they will take from our talk whatever they need.
SPEAKER_02:Yes, absolutely. Well, it was such a pleasure chatting with you today and thank you for what you're doing. I think that it's beautiful to create a space for for people that you know that you needed, and so I am so looking forward to seeing this movement grow. And I will put all the information in the show notes so everyone can join and listen and really feel the community of that. So thank you so much.
SPEAKER_00:Thank you.
SPEAKER_02:Thank you, listeners, for listening today or watching, however, you wanna view this podcast. I'll put all of Carolina's information in the show notes so you can connect with her and the and hashtag alive inheritement. Please, please go check it out. Thanks again for listening. Peace out, guys. Love your life. Bye.
