Amanda Humberson and her innovative podcast: I'm Not Finished

This interview, with an intriguing podcaster living in Denver Colorado, Amanda Humberson, delves into her philosophy on life, her brave decision to move from Chicago to Denver to start over, and her career path.  

Ms. Humberson's podcast, I'm Not Finished, is centered on themes of authenticity, imperfection, and embracing uncertainty. In this interview the conversation explores the importance of living intentionally, wrestling with life's challenges, and loving others deeply despite differences. 

Please listen to the host and Amanda reflecting on their personal experiences with vulnerability and growth, as they set the stage for future collaboration.  

Transcript

1:50

I'm very excited today to have Amanda Humberson with me. I was introduced to Amanda by another person I had on the podcast that just thought an awful lot about Amanda. And, so I listened to her podcast, which is I'm not finished. And boy, was I intrigued. And. It just really struck a chord with me. So I thought, well, this podcast that I'm doing is also about being brave enough to discover new things and to embrace new things and to maybe be brave enough to not quite know what's going on, but to still embrace it. And Amanda, good morning. And thank you so much for coming on the podcast. Thanks for having me. I'm pumped. Oh, that's great. Now, where is it that you live I'm in Denver, Colorado. Did you grow up there? No. So, I am originally from Chicago, a suburb right outside of Chicago. And I lived there for 32 years. And then nine years ago, I moved to Denver. I sold everything I own and I drove to Denver and I started over. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Talk about bravery. Yeah, right? I know. And at the time, it didn't feel brave. It just felt like it had to be done. But in hindsight, I, I'm still kind of, grappling with the fact that I just did it without really knowing much of anything. Well, I guess it worked out. It worked out. Right. I know people who, when they were eight years old, they're like, I'm going to be a doctor or I'm going to be an engineer or I'm going to, I don't know, whatever. And I wonder, is that? Is that something that you have always had a goal or a plan in mind or no? So how'd you get where you are? I was going to say, we call those jackhammers, right? The people who know what they're going to do from the moment they're born. And, and then, so Elizabeth Gilbert gave this talk, jack hammers verse hummingbirds and talks about the people who just know what they're going to do. This is what I'm going to do. This is my hobby. This is my interest. And then there's those of us who kind of dabble in everything just a little bit. Right. And that's how I would describe myself. So no, I kind of have in a weird way, always been very driven and passionate and simultaneously have let life happen to me. So no, I mean, I, from a young age, I could have told you I wanted to be a Hollywood actress and a child psychologist all within two weeks. Okay. Okay. When you say that about being driven, I can't remember exactly how you said it, but driven to move forward, but being open to going wherever that took you. Right, I like stumbled into my corporate career that happened on accident. And then, for about shy of 20 years, I was a high achiever within that space. But I would have never known to go to the office to interview for the role that landed me there, right? So it's always been this hybrid of Accident and Tension, such as life, right? That's so great. are you a college girl yeah, I went to Illinois State University and I graduated as a communications major, which really meant I could do anything. Right? We, we laugh, like communication majors, like, what do you do? And then I fell into staffing shortly after graduation and I did that for about 20 years. Oh, my goodness. Okay. And well, it's a pretty darn important part of the corporate world. They can't do their work without good, good people. Right. Right. So pretty important thing. you a little bit earlier, as we were getting ready to do this, I learned that you had a podcast for about two years and cause I was wondering how could you be so good at this podcast? Cause. As a producer of my podcast, I listened to. So many different things I pay attention to the introduction, music, introduction, voice, and how it comes in and how it goes out. And everything about your podcast is like so professional. And so, so you really knew what you're doing when you started. I'm not finished. Yes, I did. And I got to learn haphazardly through trial and error with my sister in law. So my sister in law and I started a podcast the verbal process. Again, we knew kind of this idea of what we wanted it to be, started it she's a creative. And so she really took the lead creatively with imaging and, and getting everything set up for us. And my husband was the one who did the sound mixing and whatnot on that first podcast. And my. wheelhouse was more so writing the outlines. I really, we would kind of pick a topic and I would say, okay, here's how we're going to get from A to Z on this topic. And, and so we just started and we did that for about two years. We have 50 episodes and we talked to like a lot of interesting people and yeah, and that wrapped about a year ago. And so I took everything I learned from that process and I tweaked just the things that I thought were going to be a little bit more authentic to my own voice. And I wanted to do many. So I wanted to To give people bite-sized snippets of something they could take with them and, and be really cognizant of everyone's busy schedules. And then my husband learned how to edit and so we were able to take everything we learned and apply it to the new podcast and it's worked out pretty well. Very well, very well.'cause you never even know that it is edited. Thank you. And that's good editing. That's the trick. Yeah. Right. That's right. That's right. when I clicked on the podcast to see the description of it and on, your website, you have a, a paragraph there that describes the podcast and I want to take a few minutes and go through that with you because each, each sentence that I wrote was like, Well, yeah, that's a big thing. And then the next sentence would be, Oh, that's a big thing. The first sentence in your podcast, this is your goal, is that people can offer themselves up exactly where they're at. world we live in, really. We live in the, I'm trying to be this, or I'm going to be that, or I'm pretending to be this. that's not what you're going for. No, I have a real visceral reaction to social media because of this. And so one of the biggest struggles with doing your own podcast is you have to have some social component in order to quote unquote be relevant. And so my hope was, can I enter this space and not lose sight of my goal? And, and that's, What I wanted to make sure carried throughout not only the presence of the podcast, but then in the topic and kind of within the theme of the people that I was interviewing is I don't need anybody to come on here to put on. We're not here to sell anything. We're not here to get to convince anybody of anything. And I also want to like, I also wanted to steer clear of having answers. So when you meet somebody right where they're at and in process, I didn't want this to be a podcast where we offered solutions to the problem. I just wanted people to witness other people holding the issue. Like the posture was more important than the, the end result to me. I love that because we all live with that every day. Right. We wake up and we're like, boy, I don't know what to do about this or that, or we have those issues and I think it's wonderful that you are embracing that condition. And you are embracing the condition of, hey, maybe I haven't reached my peak or the peak that I want to get to, but this is where I am. And. This is what I'm going to present. And for some reason, that's kind of a novel approach, really. Yeah, and it's, to me it's freeing, and I, I think, they always say, you try to become the person you needed. And I think, when I look back on my life, what I always wanted was permission. To be who I was in that moment, just permission, not to be punished but to be understood. And my coach always said, life is not up into the right. And that step. Say that again. Life is not always up into the right. I think we're fooled to think that life is this up into the right trajectory, meaning it's, you know, almost linear and it's not there's a lot of things that happen that they're setbacks and there's, you fall off or you go through a bout of depression, whatever it may be. And I thought. What would be helpful for people is not to think I have to get out of this rut. I have to solve for this. I have to heal immediately. It's just what does it look like to sit in it and be exactly where I'm at and to not feel alone and to have to have permission to sit here. I know that I am a recovering alcoholic. And when I first started my recovery, one of the most profound guys, I mean, I don't know what his background was, but he was a recovering guy, same as me. And I used to call him stand and hurt Larry because he would get up at the meetings and he would say, sometimes you've got to just stand and hurt. And for a person who's an alcoholic and whenever they start to hurt, they just want to anesthetize that. Right. That was such a big thing. And that's exactly what you're talking about. This is, it's okay. Yep. Yeah. To just hurt. Yeah. To stand and hurt. Yeah. It's the human. Yeah. Right. Yeah. You don't have to, you don't have to punish yourself or be, or, or be disappointed with yourself because everything isn't perfect. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I think that's wonderful and it's a big, a big concept. The second sentence in your introduction is, this is a place where perfection is never the goal. Right. And that goes right along with what you're saying there. Exactly. Right. Because. But we all think it is. I mean, it's hard. It's like such an undoing, right? It's we've all built this muscle. And again, it just goes to show you can tell based on what people believe others want to see from physicality, like true physicality of looks and all that to your home or the way you're raising your children. There's this image that people have. It's different for everybody of this goal they're trying to attain. And if they do, then you can check the box and then. And I always used to say, and then what? Like, I've achieved a lot of goals, and it's interesting that the level of, quote unquote, joy, contentment, and peace post goal, to me it's like there's a temporary rise. But it's not one that is actually withstood the test of time. And so then there's the next goal and the next thing that's going to help. So when I say perfection is not the goal, it's like, we have to stop striving for this idea that we're going to arrive in this state of quote unquote perfection, whatever that is for somebody. Because then we kind of miss it. And again, I just want, I want permission to, to stop striving. So therefore I felt like even if this podcast is for me. yes, and, it's interesting that you say that because really my spiritual path is where I'm going with my podcast. And it really is about, there were things that my guests talk about, which I don't, I'm not entirely able to accept it, but I don't not accept it. Right. You know, it's the kind of thing where they'll sometimes they'll say things where I'm like, geez. I gotta get my head around that, or maybe I don't. All I know is you believe it, and someone can probably benefit from you talking about it. Right. And it might hit a different chord with someone else. Right. I find that very interesting. And the next thing you have in here is that in your podcast, it's a place where people are not afraid to wrestle with life out loud. Yes. Yes. When my son was in college I went to visit him and I was only there about half an hour and he goes, dad, I've got a lot going on. I'm not ready to go deep right now, which he knew that what I wanted to do is to have both of us talk about wrestling with our own lives. Yeah. You know, because that is something I've always believed is so important to do. And, and there are many people who never want to wrestle with life out loud. Right. Right. And that's why my first podcast was called The Verbal Process because that is how I do We both felt we process life and, and I agree, there are people who do not do it that way there when you talk about anesthetizing. I mean, think about, you know, alcohol is one Avenue. There's a million, right? There's sex, there's drugs, there's pride there. I mean, there's just, it's interesting because it's, there's a laundry list of ways that we just try not to touch it. But one of the things I've learned is it's very cathartic for me to just get it out there and, and take the power away from it being within me. Another thing that you mentioned in your opening is that that guests are doing the work to live intentionally. And what do you mean by that? Doing the work? So, you know what's funny is I think when I came hot outta the gates, I had an idea of what doing the work looked like. And it has been. Alright, well, it's, it's been a little bit of a long day and I want to take a minute to let you know that I'm really grateful for all that you've offered me today and I'm actually going to be making a video soon but first I want to just take a moment to introduce myself. If you're going to therapy and doing coaching, then you've somehow figured it out. And if you're not doing these things, somehow you might not care or be as invested. And I didn't, that wasn't the point I think for me, I've been able to kind of reestablish that meaning for myself. In its own way. Just anybody who's willing to just take a look in the mirror and and talk about what they see there. And so if they're not ready to necessarily approach therapy or coaching or spiritual direction or something along those lines, something more formal or costly, just somebody who's willing to take a look in the mirror and start having conversations or thinking about things in a newfound way. I think I struggle with somebody who can not scratch the surface of maybe some of the work that needs to be done. And even so, you love those people well, I just, my podcast isn't the place for that. Right. I think that's wonderful advice that your coach gave you is you don't, and this is something you do very successfully. You don't come off as someone who's saying, I, Amanda Humberson know how to do everything. And if you just listen to me, you will know how to do it. And because when I hear that, I'm like, Oh, next right? Cringe. I don't, I don't want to hear that. No, I don't believe that everybody has all the answers and never have. And but you don't do that. And I think that just of like what you said, you thought doing the work was one thing and then by listening, actually listening to what these people who are struggling and having all different life experiences, the way they're doing it. I think it's fantastic. And I think it's so awesome. encouraging to people to be able to listen to this. I'm hoping to, we can have a little time to talk about some of the things that these people have gone through, but it's like, when I hear some of these things, it's like that happened. And then that happened and then all within the same month. And then you just got up and then what did you do? And and they, They did something, you know, they had a path and they tell you about it. Yeah. Fantastic. And you see all of it gets used. I think that's been the, it's so beautiful. It all gets used. It's neat. Okay. One last thing and that is that you rejoice in people who know themselves, love others. Well, And live with radical authenticity. Yes. I can say that none of those three is very easy. Not at all. In my opinion. Not at all. It's not easy to know yourself. I have worked. A long time and made a lot of false starts. Yeah. And had a lot of people give me feedback to let me know that I didn't really know myself. Yeah. and it's, it's hard to admit, right. But it's a journey. Right. Yeah. That's kind of one of those things. Like when you talk about not having arrived, I think knowing yourself as part of that because you're ever evolving and ever changing, I think knowing yourself is maybe knowing that about yourself. Right. So when I think about knowing yourself, it's like even knowing that you have blind spots and you're open to receiving feedback Is a part of knowing yourself. Right? So it's not like, oh, I, I know every square inch of who I am, who I was, and who I'm becoming. And I'm going to remain right here forever and ever. Amen. That's not it. It's. I know myself. So I know I have a propensity to have blind spots. I know that I can be impulsive and, and have these false starts, like you've, you've said, like knowing that about yourself or learning, or like I said, being open to receiving that feedback is all part of it. So again, like I, some of my language, I'm like, yeah, I hope that doesn't sound concrete. to know themselves to the best of their ability, because part of being ourselves is being able to know. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's great. And to love others. Well something that we all shoot for, but it's pretty big, pretty big sentence or big, pretty big phrase. It is. I think that there's a paradigm shift happening and we are being called up in a new way. And what I think we got away with calling love before we're all, seeing that it isn't necessarily love, right? Like I think it was easy to love people like ourselves. It's easy to love people who don't create any havoc in our world. It's easy to love people that are easy to love. I don't know. And so I think right now we are being called up. I feel that like spiritually to love, like at a different dimension and to truly love the neighbor and love the enemy in a way that, is going to take a new muscle and we're all being called to work on that muscle. Does that make sense? It makes sense. And it really ties in with the last interview that I did with Lynn Sparrow Christie, who wrote a book, Beyond Soul Growth, and what that is talking about is that we all are co creators of reality, of the world, consciousness. Some people, not to get too deep, but you know, God consciousness or Christ consciousness, we all are co creators with it. Right. And that. years ago, you know, the Romans would go bring their family and go sit in a coliseum and watch people kill each other and get eaten by animals. That was at that time, that was just another day out. Well, our, Consciousness of people has moved forward from there. And we're continuing to move forward. And now we're at a spot, and I do agree with you, and a lot of people that are in the world of spirituality talk about how this is perhaps the greatest opportunity that humankind has had for ever, and that it's starting to happen, and that, as, as Lynn said Sparrow Christie said is there are some of us who have to take on the mantle of being kind of a leader of it and going ahead and moving forward and loving in the way that you're talking about and not just giving it lip service, but really going the full distance, where the person is there that you like, man, they are so different from me. And they have totally different political views than I have, but, but they are a person that's worthy of love and respect and courtesy and everything. And that's not the current vibe going on in our American society. I know. But we, as a human, race we can do it. We can. I know. I know. It's we have to work on our fear. I just interviewed somebody and we talk about how fear gets in the way of love. And I think a lot of us are afraid of the unknown. We're afraid of what it could mean. You know, I would say that my first podcast Christian undertones. And I think what made me personally want to not necessarily continue to participate in something that was. religious in nature is because it felt exclusive. And that right there is the antithesis of love. And so I thought you can be who you are. I can be who I am, but we don't need to use language that's going to create division before we even get to know each other. And that's why when I started, I'm not finished. I thought we, if that is a part of a guest comes on and that's a part of who they are and they speak of it, it is welcome. It doesn't mean that I am promoting them. or that I am fully supporting, or that I am in agreeance with everything anyone's ever said. But that's not the point. The point is that you get to exist as your whole self, I get to exist as my whole self, and we can love each other right where we're at. You say it so easily. comes right from inside you that's what you believe. And, and that's a beautiful thing. And I hope that as people are listening to this podcast that they think to themselves, is that who I am? You know, am I? if Embracing difference and I accepting others and just. not being afraid of that. Right, right. it's so important. And in your podcast, I think it is admirable that you started off your podcast with your own struggle out loud. About a loss of your dog. Oh, yeah. you're not saying, Oh, you people have to bear it on the tape. I'll put you out there, but I'm not doing it. Yeah. That's not it. It's like you started off and said, Hey, this is what I want. And I'll go first. I'll go first. And you know, what's funny is if you listen, so the verbal process, the very first podcast I did, the very first episode. outside of the intro was me telling my entire story. So I did the same thing on the verbal process. I thought, if I'm going to ask people to come on here and do this, I'll start. I also got on stage at a, at a women's event about a year and a half ago. And I told my entire story on stage. You can find that on YouTube. And then I did, I started this one vulnerably again, because I thought you cannot expect somebody to drop their wall of self preservation if you don't do it first. So Right. So yeah, I did so, and it's funny'cause we're, this is Foxy, the dog that I lost. She, it was her birthday. It was her birthday two days ago. And I, oh, and I kind of promoted that episode because it was one that I wasn't even sure I was gonna air, but I thought, why not? Well, I'm glad you did. Yeah, thank you. I'm glad you did. I think one of your earlier ones was a person who. Had this happen and then that happened and that happened. They, had a health scare. They lost a sibling. They broke up with their fiance right before the wedding, lost their house, their dog, had to start a new job. I love what came out of that is you have, this is a quote. You have to just. Sort of come to peace with that and just show up every day. Yeah. And like wherever I'm going on this journey, I'm just gonna keep walking in whatever direction it is. And I think that is such a profound thing. Yeah. It's like I am still alive. Mm-Hmm. I don't like any of that stuff that just happened. Right. And I have to live with it. Yeah. And I don't really know where to go. Yeah. But I have to do something. Yes. I have to just keep walking. It is, it's a, it's, you can control the controllables and it's a freeing posture. Yeah. There's a lot of stuff that I didn't have control over that happened to me, and so what can I do is I can control the controllables. I can control how I move forward. I can, take my thoughts captive. And I know this person, which is funny. I met this person about a year ago. And I've seen the way she lives. That's how she lives. Like that was not lip service, right? That was, that is how she carries herself. She is a free spirit and she's warm and and we've kept in touch and she's just, she's a light, so she, yeah, she meant it. Yeah, I'm gonna just show up every day and I'm just gonna keep walking in wherever direction I'm going. Right. I love that. I do too. I love that. She's very inspired. Luckily at this point in my life I don't have as many of the. I've been talking to people about work issues and raising kids issues and things like that. And then that's a very nice thing for me. So it's kind of easier for me to keep walking in whatever direction I'm going in. but I still am enjoying the heck out of that process because it frees me up to say. Well, I can face more fear. I can face more things. Maybe I'll go for that past life regression. And maybe I'll go for that medium reading. Yeah. And maybe I'll try these different things. Yeah. Maybe I'll, it'll work out. Maybe it won't, but I'm going to just try it. I'm just going to live. Just going to live and I'm gonna let it rip. Yes, and and I I applaud that way of living Yes, so much and that's what you're promoting. I am and I'm trying to do it myself We're actually in a season right now my husband and I where we feel called to move But we're not sure where and there's a lot of moving parts, but we're We're like, you know what? And we have two kids, and we know we're responsible. We'll never let anything happen to our kids, but within our control is my point. We're not going to make an uneducated decision, and we're not going to be, but there is an element of let it rip, even with kids. Yeah. Even with jobs and just trusting that when you feel like you get one shot at this and I just don't. Yeah. There've been enough times in my life where I've, I've let fear drive and I just, it never ends well. So yeah. Right. You don't look back on those moments and say, well, I'm really proud of myself that I played it. Yeah. Yeah. That I was safe. I played it safe. Those aren't my best moments. And I am really enjoying our discussion and I, there are so many more topics that I would really like to go into. So would you be willing to do another podcast with me? I would love it. I would love to. Okay. Well, I would love it too, because. I think I'm getting so much out of this and I really, I really appreciate it. So, well, let's finish up for now and then we'll do another and air that another time. Awesome. Thank you so much. All right. Have a good one.