{"version":"1.0.0","segments":[{"startTime":8.842,"endTime":9.926,"body":"Hi. Welcome."},{"startTime":9.926,"endTime":12.262,"body":"Hey, welcome."},{"startTime":12.262,"endTime":13.722,"body":"I'm Daniel."},{"startTime":13.722,"endTime":14.597,"body":"I'm Laura Kightlinger."},{"startTime":14.597,"endTime":18.268,"body":"And today we have a good friend"},{"startTime":14.597,"endTime":18.268,"body":"and a really funny."},{"startTime":18.351,"endTime":20.145,"body":"We are so lucky."},{"startTime":20.145,"endTime":22.439,"body":"We're blessed."},{"startTime":22.439,"endTime":24.274,"body":"We're just blessed."},{"startTime":24.274,"endTime":27.777,"body":"Saying really very funny."},{"startTime":27.777,"endTime":30.113,"body":"And you can see there's special effects."},{"startTime":30.113,"endTime":32.49,"body":"Unprotected sex."},{"startTime":32.49,"endTime":35.41,"body":"but my favorite credit,"},{"startTime":32.49,"endTime":35.41,"body":"which I think is such a badge of honor,"},{"startTime":35.41,"endTime":37.328,"body":"is just the recently"},{"startTime":35.41,"endTime":37.328,"body":"passed out the Comedy Store."},{"startTime":37.328,"endTime":38.872,"body":"Fantastic."},{"startTime":38.872,"endTime":40.749,"body":"And you're going to be there tonight"},{"startTime":38.872,"endTime":40.749,"body":"right now."},{"startTime":40.749,"endTime":43.168,"body":"That's awesome."},{"startTime":43.168,"endTime":45.295,"body":"And that's not easy, that place."},{"startTime":45.295,"endTime":46.921,"body":"So that's. Great."},{"startTime":46.921,"endTime":47.839,"body":"But Amy Miller."},{"startTime":47.839,"endTime":50.008,"body":"Amy Miller."},{"startTime":50.008,"endTime":52.218,"body":"Yay! Amy."},{"startTime":52.218,"endTime":55.472,"body":"You can find my name in the parking"},{"startTime":52.218,"endTime":55.472,"body":"lot down by the ground."},{"startTime":55.472,"endTime":58.224,"body":"Yeah, I especially."},{"startTime":58.224,"endTime":58.975,"body":"It's so funny."},{"startTime":58.975,"endTime":61.978,"body":"I wish we would replace some names. Yeah."},{"startTime":62.103,"endTime":64.397,"body":"Ah, yeah, yeah, I'm."},{"startTime":64.397,"endTime":66.983,"body":"I'm on there, but I would like to be."},{"startTime":64.397,"endTime":66.983,"body":"How are you?"},{"startTime":66.983,"endTime":67.901,"body":"I'm just not."},{"startTime":67.901,"endTime":69.861,"body":"I don't know,"},{"startTime":67.901,"endTime":69.861,"body":"because I'm part of the pavement."},{"startTime":69.861,"endTime":73.865,"body":"Maybe a venue too long,"},{"startTime":73.948,"endTime":74.407,"body":"right?"},{"startTime":74.407,"endTime":77.035,"body":"Over time. I don't know that they do."},{"startTime":77.035,"endTime":81.247,"body":"Yeah, but then when they built,"},{"startTime":77.035,"endTime":81.247,"body":"they expanded the bar on the patio."},{"startTime":81.247,"endTime":83.124,"body":"They just, like, cut into Bob Sack."},{"startTime":83.124,"endTime":83.666,"body":"It's names."},{"startTime":83.666,"endTime":85.126,"body":"It just says Bob saw."},{"startTime":85.126,"endTime":87.253,"body":"you could."},{"startTime":87.253,"endTime":89.214,"body":"He deserves to be moved."},{"startTime":89.214,"endTime":94.177,"body":"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I agree."},{"startTime":94.26,"endTime":95.095,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":95.095,"endTime":97.013,"body":"Pick a rapist and take it out."},{"startTime":97.013,"endTime":98.89,"body":"And at some theater, I came,"},{"startTime":98.89,"endTime":102.519,"body":"I think it was in, like, Huntington,"},{"startTime":98.89,"endTime":102.519,"body":"New York, with larger and backstage."},{"startTime":102.519,"endTime":105.063,"body":"The clearly,"},{"startTime":102.519,"endTime":105.063,"body":"everything had just been repainted."},{"startTime":105.063,"endTime":108.942,"body":"But the frame of the door,"},{"startTime":105.063,"endTime":108.942,"body":"the paint stopped,"},{"startTime":108.942,"endTime":112.112,"body":"and where it stopped was sign"},{"startTime":108.942,"endTime":112.112,"body":"and real old lady handwriting."},{"startTime":112.112,"endTime":115.115,"body":"Carol Channing."},{"startTime":115.323,"endTime":117.075,"body":"that's pretty amazing."},{"startTime":117.075,"endTime":121.788,"body":"Also, like, is that like some old queen,"},{"startTime":117.075,"endTime":121.788,"body":"like, pranking us who did it? But."},{"startTime":121.83,"endTime":125.375,"body":"Ah, was so old looking, right,"},{"startTime":121.83,"endTime":125.375,"body":"that we couldn't believe it."},{"startTime":125.458,"endTime":128.545,"body":"Yeah, well, apparently the the the person"},{"startTime":128.545,"endTime":131.881,"body":"who painted the candy store"},{"startTime":128.545,"endTime":131.881,"body":"names and died."},{"startTime":131.965,"endTime":136.469,"body":"So now they have, like, I don't know,"},{"startTime":131.965,"endTime":136.469,"body":"a few other people, but the last round,"},{"startTime":136.469,"endTime":140.682,"body":"you know, our friend stuff going on"},{"startTime":136.469,"endTime":140.682,"body":"and the names were too big."},{"startTime":140.765,"endTime":141.516,"body":"shut up."},{"startTime":141.516,"endTime":144.853,"body":"Like the new person really just went wild."},{"startTime":144.936,"endTime":145.478,"body":"It's."},{"startTime":145.478,"endTime":147.647,"body":"It's just such a funny tradition."},{"startTime":147.647,"endTime":148.314,"body":"And plus."},{"startTime":148.314,"endTime":150.942,"body":"It's not your actual signature, which."},{"startTime":150.942,"endTime":151.442,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":151.442,"endTime":152.735,"body":"Yeah, that's right."},{"startTime":152.735,"endTime":154.487,"body":"I mean, you couldn't read it."},{"startTime":154.487,"endTime":158.199,"body":"My would just be like a triangle and. And."},{"startTime":158.283,"endTime":159.284,"body":"Yeah, that's true."},{"startTime":159.284,"endTime":161.744,"body":"Yeah. Yeah. We were just like."},{"startTime":161.744,"endTime":165.248,"body":"it's like when someone you have"},{"startTime":161.744,"endTime":165.248,"body":"to replace something that's like a legacy."},{"startTime":165.248,"endTime":165.915,"body":"I feel the same."},{"startTime":165.915,"endTime":168.793,"body":"Like on The Price Is Right"},{"startTime":165.915,"endTime":168.793,"body":"when Rod Roddy died, not even Bob."},{"startTime":168.793,"endTime":170.879,"body":"Yeah, the announcer guy."},{"startTime":170.879,"endTime":173.548,"body":"And now it's just some,"},{"startTime":170.879,"endTime":173.548,"body":"like, spunky, clean dude"},{"startTime":173.548,"endTime":176.134,"body":"who sounds like he should be"},{"startTime":173.548,"endTime":176.134,"body":"announcing, like, the flight at Burbank."},{"startTime":176.134,"endTime":178.72,"body":"he's, like, too glossy."},{"startTime":178.72,"endTime":180.847,"body":"Yeah, he was incredible."},{"startTime":180.847,"endTime":183.808,"body":"It's funny when people look like"},{"startTime":180.847,"endTime":183.808,"body":"they're an announcer."},{"startTime":183.808,"endTime":186.811,"body":"yeah. Have their face."},{"startTime":186.853,"endTime":187.52,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":187.52,"endTime":189.48,"body":"Now, something like radio."},{"startTime":189.48,"endTime":191.232,"body":"And that's what drives me nuts."},{"startTime":191.232,"endTime":194.944,"body":"Like, even like writing on some TV shows"},{"startTime":191.232,"endTime":194.944,"body":"when people when the characters"},{"startTime":194.944,"endTime":198.698,"body":"don't look like the"},{"startTime":194.944,"endTime":198.698,"body":"name, like I want I wanted to"},{"startTime":198.781,"endTime":201.826,"body":"like a lot of the pilots that I worked on"},{"startTime":198.781,"endTime":201.826,"body":"that didn't go anywhere."},{"startTime":201.826,"endTime":205.163,"body":"I, I, well, I remember"},{"startTime":205.163,"endTime":208.583,"body":"her last name is Sullivan"},{"startTime":205.163,"endTime":208.583,"body":"and she was on MADtv and I'm blanking it."},{"startTime":208.666,"endTime":210.752,"body":"Nicole Thank you."},{"startTime":210.752,"endTime":215.173,"body":"Boy, it's weird how my subconscious"},{"startTime":210.752,"endTime":215.173,"body":"has a way of sounding like my husband."},{"startTime":215.256,"endTime":216.216,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":216.216,"endTime":221.137,"body":"Nicole Sullivan's character was something"},{"startTime":216.216,"endTime":221.137,"body":"like Tiffany or Marg or something."},{"startTime":221.137,"endTime":222.096,"body":"Just didn't look like her."},{"startTime":222.096,"endTime":224.349,"body":"And I said, It has to be Bonnie."},{"startTime":224.349,"endTime":225.058,"body":"And then it was."},{"startTime":225.058,"endTime":227.227,"body":"And she looks like a Bonnie"},{"startTime":225.058,"endTime":227.227,"body":"to me, her character."},{"startTime":227.227,"endTime":228.269,"body":"Yeah, but I don't know."},{"startTime":228.269,"endTime":231.272,"body":"It's almost like I can't look at dog"},{"startTime":228.269,"endTime":231.272,"body":"shelters online is"},{"startTime":231.272,"endTime":234.275,"body":"because they pick all the wrong names."},{"startTime":234.359,"endTime":236.236,"body":"I know one. Of them was there."},{"startTime":236.236,"endTime":236.653,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":236.653,"endTime":239.197,"body":"Well,"},{"startTime":236.653,"endTime":239.197,"body":"can you or does that also up the dog?"},{"startTime":239.197,"endTime":242.2,"body":"I know if it's you. All on her name."},{"startTime":242.408,"endTime":244.41,"body":"And then they're on"},{"startTime":242.408,"endTime":244.41,"body":"people are so uncreative."},{"startTime":244.41,"endTime":248.748,"body":"Like if the dog has one blue eye and one"},{"startTime":244.41,"endTime":248.748,"body":"brown either always call them Bowie,"},{"startTime":248.831,"endTime":249.499,"body":"which I don't."},{"startTime":249.499,"endTime":249.832,"body":"Like."},{"startTime":249.832,"endTime":252.293,"body":"I should be called like, schizo"},{"startTime":249.832,"endTime":252.293,"body":"or anything."},{"startTime":252.293,"endTime":254.212,"body":"Yeah, or."},{"startTime":254.212,"endTime":257.215,"body":"Or Diane Lane or don't even mention it."},{"startTime":257.423,"endTime":259.092,"body":"I am is a great name."},{"startTime":259.092,"endTime":260.218,"body":"I think so too."},{"startTime":260.218,"endTime":262.679,"body":"You know, I've got to Amy,"},{"startTime":260.218,"endTime":262.679,"body":"have a little bit of a pet peeve with her."},{"startTime":262.679,"endTime":268.434,"body":"A little issue with her, no pun intended,"},{"startTime":262.679,"endTime":268.434,"body":"that we were at a party, and I was, you"},{"startTime":268.434,"endTime":271.771,"body":"know, you know, a few sheets in the wind"},{"startTime":268.434,"endTime":271.771,"body":"that probably goes without saying."},{"startTime":271.771,"endTime":276.025,"body":"But I, I auditioned for this movie"},{"startTime":276.109,"endTime":278.403,"body":"with her three times, and I remember"},{"startTime":278.403,"endTime":281.447,"body":"she was so nice to me and said,"},{"startTime":278.403,"endTime":281.447,"body":"you're like your brother for fresh air."},{"startTime":281.447,"endTime":282.782,"body":"And we were laughing, you know?"},{"startTime":282.782,"endTime":286.577,"body":"And so I, I went up to her at this point"},{"startTime":282.782,"endTime":286.577,"body":"and said, you, you know,"},{"startTime":286.661,"endTime":288.288,"body":"I how I want her to remember me."},{"startTime":288.288,"endTime":289.414,"body":"But I said, Well, I'm Laura."},{"startTime":289.414,"endTime":291.332,"body":"You might, you might remember me from."},{"startTime":291.332,"endTime":294.544,"body":"And she said, No, I don't,"},{"startTime":291.332,"endTime":294.544,"body":"but I remember you."},{"startTime":294.544,"endTime":298.006,"body":"And flirting Lee to my husband,"},{"startTime":294.544,"endTime":298.006,"body":"Garrett and you."},{"startTime":298.006,"endTime":298.089,"body":"Good."},{"startTime":298.089,"endTime":301.926,"body":"But I remember you, you know, seeing that"},{"startTime":298.089,"endTime":301.926,"body":"I was no competition clearly."},{"startTime":302.01,"endTime":303.428,"body":"And then and Garrett said no."},{"startTime":303.428,"endTime":305.096,"body":"And she goes, But didn't you work on the."},{"startTime":305.096,"endTime":306.055,"body":"And he goes, No."},{"startTime":306.055,"endTime":311.602,"body":"And I was like, All right, just go ahead"},{"startTime":306.055,"endTime":311.602,"body":"and go off with Diane Lane only."},{"startTime":311.686,"endTime":315.148,"body":"Exactly. Exactly."},{"startTime":315.231,"endTime":315.982,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":315.982,"endTime":318.443,"body":"Yeah. You don't remember me, but."},{"startTime":318.443,"endTime":318.943,"body":"You're."},{"startTime":318.943,"endTime":321.487,"body":"You remembered"},{"startTime":318.943,"endTime":321.487,"body":"somebody that you've never met, Okay."},{"startTime":321.487,"endTime":322.238,"body":"Have you?"},{"startTime":322.238,"endTime":323.531,"body":"We just celebrated"},{"startTime":323.531,"endTime":327.201,"body":"the fact that my boyfriend saw Dolly"},{"startTime":323.531,"endTime":327.201,"body":"Parton somewhere in the street, say, you."},{"startTime":327.368,"endTime":328.036,"body":"I can't."},{"startTime":328.036,"endTime":330.997,"body":"I sort of felt something weird in the air."},{"startTime":331.164,"endTime":331.748,"body":"that's right."},{"startTime":331.748,"endTime":333.082,"body":"I woke up before noon."},{"startTime":333.082,"endTime":335.46,"body":"Something was on."},{"startTime":335.46,"endTime":336.878,"body":"As someone who's seen."},{"startTime":336.878,"endTime":339.255,"body":"Like, Angelina with regularity."},{"startTime":339.255,"endTime":342.008,"body":"Yeah. But I realize that is a miracle."},{"startTime":342.008,"endTime":345.845,"body":"Every time I see her, I feel like a dolly"},{"startTime":342.008,"endTime":345.845,"body":"sighting in the wild is."},{"startTime":345.928,"endTime":346.721,"body":"That's pretty."},{"startTime":346.721,"endTime":349.724,"body":"That's a rare thing, right? Very rare."},{"startTime":349.724,"endTime":351.434,"body":"Yeah. my God. So many places."},{"startTime":351.434,"endTime":353.269,"body":"You're huge Dolly fan."},{"startTime":353.269,"endTime":355.48,"body":"I was shocked at how I saw her in the air."},{"startTime":355.48,"endTime":357.94,"body":"I saw Dolly in the airport with."},{"startTime":357.94,"endTime":360.485,"body":"With her,"},{"startTime":357.94,"endTime":360.485,"body":"all of her guards and stuff around her."},{"startTime":360.485,"endTime":361.444,"body":"It's shocking."},{"startTime":361.444,"endTime":362.528,"body":"She is beautiful."},{"startTime":362.528,"endTime":364.989,"body":"She is tiny as hell."},{"startTime":364.989,"endTime":366.032,"body":"And she had heels."},{"startTime":366.032,"endTime":370.745,"body":"I think like she always wears high heels,"},{"startTime":366.032,"endTime":370.745,"body":"but she can't be over five feet tall."},{"startTime":370.828,"endTime":371.079,"body":"yeah."},{"startTime":371.079,"endTime":372.789,"body":"I've had my hand around her waist."},{"startTime":372.789,"endTime":374.957,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":374.957,"endTime":380.046,"body":"And I really just felt like"},{"startTime":374.957,"endTime":380.046,"body":"I was going to break her."},{"startTime":380.046,"endTime":382.048,"body":"lady way just."},{"startTime":382.048,"endTime":385.343,"body":"She is so, so tiny. Yeah."},{"startTime":385.426,"endTime":388.888,"body":"In the vault of the Rock"},{"startTime":385.426,"endTime":388.888,"body":"Roll Hall of Fame."},{"startTime":388.971,"endTime":393.142,"body":"And do the tour, and they open a closet"},{"startTime":388.971,"endTime":393.142,"body":"and you see, like, ten."},{"startTime":393.226,"endTime":395.937,"body":"And there she is. You know."},{"startTime":395.978,"endTime":398.189,"body":"It's one of these article."},{"startTime":398.189,"endTime":399.107,"body":"They're like Jimi Hendrix,"},{"startTime":399.107,"endTime":400.775,"body":"and they show you the photo of like,"},{"startTime":399.107,"endTime":400.775,"body":"my God and everything."},{"startTime":400.775,"endTime":403.569,"body":"It was Elvis's army outfit."},{"startTime":403.569,"endTime":404.779,"body":"man. Yeah."},{"startTime":404.779,"endTime":408.574,"body":"But Dolly had several things"},{"startTime":404.779,"endTime":408.574,"body":"because their exhibit had just closed."},{"startTime":408.574,"endTime":411.828,"body":"So there's like three mannequins"},{"startTime":408.574,"endTime":411.828,"body":"with a straight talk."},{"startTime":411.911,"endTime":414.122,"body":"The the what do you call that?"},{"startTime":414.122,"endTime":415.248,"body":"Pinball machine?"},{"startTime":415.248,"endTime":416.666,"body":"That yellow. Dress. Yeah."},{"startTime":416.666,"endTime":418.584,"body":"it is."},{"startTime":418.584,"endTime":421.921,"body":"Anyway, but her mannequins, she sent them"},{"startTime":422.004,"endTime":425.091,"body":"because she has mannequins"},{"startTime":422.004,"endTime":425.091,"body":"that are her tiny man."},{"startTime":425.091,"endTime":425.8,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":425.8,"endTime":426.384,"body":"my God."},{"startTime":426.384,"endTime":429.137,"body":"But her shoes were lined up"},{"startTime":426.384,"endTime":429.137,"body":"and her shoes are."},{"startTime":429.137,"endTime":430.054,"body":"It's like this month."},{"startTime":430.054,"endTime":431.681,"body":"It's like"},{"startTime":431.681,"endTime":434.517,"body":"her. Shoe is like a five or a four."},{"startTime":434.517,"endTime":436.644,"body":"Now. Even she's."},{"startTime":436.644,"endTime":438.729,"body":"yeah."},{"startTime":438.729,"endTime":440.481,"body":"What does she like in person?"},{"startTime":440.481,"endTime":443.151,"body":"she was very sweet. Yeah of course."},{"startTime":443.151,"endTime":444.485,"body":"But you know, it was a meet and greet."},{"startTime":444.485,"endTime":446.446,"body":"It's like what's she going to do?"},{"startTime":446.446,"endTime":449.365,"body":"But she's very good"},{"startTime":446.446,"endTime":449.365,"body":"at managing people's nerves and just like,"},{"startTime":449.365,"endTime":452.785,"body":"you know, because no one wants to,"},{"startTime":449.365,"endTime":452.785,"body":"like, approach you when it's your turn."},{"startTime":452.785,"endTime":454.37,"body":"yeah."},{"startTime":454.37,"endTime":458.624,"body":"I met her in Hollywood, Florida."},{"startTime":458.708,"endTime":461.127,"body":"Yeah, I know her tour manager for a while."},{"startTime":461.127,"endTime":464.422,"body":"And so I was like, you know, I want to do"},{"startTime":461.127,"endTime":464.422,"body":"the meet and greet, go to a show."},{"startTime":464.422,"endTime":467.175,"body":"And she was like, and it's like $2,000."},{"startTime":467.175,"endTime":470.344,"body":"So I'm like, wow, I'm not I know."},{"startTime":470.428,"endTime":472.722,"body":"I don't have any, like, star struck."},{"startTime":472.722,"endTime":473.139,"body":"Goodness."},{"startTime":473.139,"endTime":476.601,"body":"Like, there's never been really anybody"},{"startTime":473.139,"endTime":476.601,"body":"I wanted to meet."},{"startTime":476.684,"endTime":477.477,"body":"and Paul Reubens."},{"startTime":477.477,"endTime":483.232,"body":"And it's to it"},{"startTime":477.477,"endTime":483.232,"body":"but I, I'm like, I'm not paying for that."},{"startTime":483.316,"endTime":483.858,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":483.858,"endTime":486.819,"body":"And she was like, well,"},{"startTime":483.858,"endTime":486.819,"body":"if you don't go in L.A.,"},{"startTime":486.819,"endTime":489.739,"body":"like, pick another city."},{"startTime":489.739,"endTime":491.157,"body":"like, I can just get you in."},{"startTime":491.157,"endTime":493.034,"body":"So I was like, Hell yeah."},{"startTime":493.034,"endTime":496.245,"body":"So I flew to Florida, Like"},{"startTime":496.287,"endTime":500.124,"body":"Thanksgiving week 2016 and."},{"startTime":500.124,"endTime":505.046,"body":"Yeah, and then saw the show, sat next"},{"startTime":500.124,"endTime":505.046,"body":"to Clive Davis for some reason. Wow."},{"startTime":505.046,"endTime":508.132,"body":"Yeah, I saw just like,"},{"startTime":505.046,"endTime":508.132,"body":"in, like, lime green suited up."},{"startTime":508.132,"endTime":509.634,"body":"Like he looked amazing."},{"startTime":509.634,"endTime":511.761,"body":"I'm like,"},{"startTime":509.634,"endTime":511.761,"body":"I don't know what you're doing here."},{"startTime":511.761,"endTime":512.929,"body":"Maybe he lives in Boca."},{"startTime":512.929,"endTime":515.848,"body":"How could you have a place in Boca?"},{"startTime":515.848,"endTime":516.682,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":516.682,"endTime":519.56,"body":"Yeah. Miami is pretty popular, too. It's."},{"startTime":519.56,"endTime":520.853,"body":"You sat next to Clive Davis."},{"startTime":520.853,"endTime":521.854,"body":"I know."},{"startTime":521.854,"endTime":523.606,"body":"It was an incredible show."},{"startTime":523.606,"endTime":526.067,"body":"And, yeah, it was just."},{"startTime":523.606,"endTime":526.067,"body":"She was just so sweet."},{"startTime":526.067,"endTime":528.319,"body":"But I didn't, you know,"},{"startTime":526.067,"endTime":528.319,"body":"I had all these things."},{"startTime":528.319,"endTime":529.529,"body":"I was going to say, and then I was just."},{"startTime":529.529,"endTime":533.574,"body":"I'm a complete mute. Ha!"},{"startTime":533.658,"endTime":533.991,"body":"But she."},{"startTime":533.991,"endTime":536.244,"body":"I told you this, but she grabbed my ex's."},{"startTime":536.244,"endTime":539.455,"body":"But yeah. not with kids."},{"startTime":539.497,"endTime":541.499,"body":"She's old fashioned"},{"startTime":541.499,"endTime":543.918,"body":"country. Yeah. She like."},{"startTime":543.918,"endTime":544.71,"body":"And your ex."},{"startTime":544.71,"endTime":547.797,"body":"Got a little scoop and he"},{"startTime":547.797,"endTime":550.925,"body":"when he came out, I mean angry,"},{"startTime":547.797,"endTime":550.925,"body":"he was just like, how was it?"},{"startTime":550.925,"endTime":552.927,"body":"And I'm like,"},{"startTime":550.925,"endTime":552.927,"body":"I was just so nervous. I didn't know."},{"startTime":552.927,"endTime":553.594,"body":"What do you say?"},{"startTime":553.594,"endTime":555.972,"body":"I'm just like,"},{"startTime":553.594,"endTime":555.972,"body":"Thanks for everything, you know?"},{"startTime":555.972,"endTime":560.726,"body":"And he was just"},{"startTime":555.972,"endTime":560.726,"body":"trying to check in with me."},{"startTime":560.726,"endTime":564.855,"body":"And then he goes, Well,"},{"startTime":560.726,"endTime":564.855,"body":"she grabbed my butt."},{"startTime":564.939,"endTime":568.276,"body":"lad. With that, I lost her daughter."},{"startTime":568.526,"endTime":572.697,"body":"Wow. That photo of them, like, he's"},{"startTime":568.526,"endTime":572.697,"body":"very, like, wide eyed and."},{"startTime":572.697,"endTime":576.909,"body":"it's like the Taylor Swift situation"},{"startTime":572.697,"endTime":576.909,"body":"with the radio hosts."},{"startTime":576.951,"endTime":579.996,"body":"Like, you can see, like,"},{"startTime":576.951,"endTime":579.996,"body":"she's taken a grab."},{"startTime":579.996,"endTime":582.999,"body":"Yeah, but it's like, how did I meet you"},{"startTime":579.996,"endTime":582.999,"body":"and what are you going to get mad,"},{"startTime":583.04,"endTime":585.126,"body":"you know? Yeah."},{"startTime":585.209,"endTime":585.918,"body":"Hollywood, Florida."},{"startTime":585.918,"endTime":588.921,"body":"I can never not think of it"},{"startTime":585.918,"endTime":588.921,"body":"is where and Nicole Smith died."},{"startTime":589.046,"endTime":590.84,"body":"Who is a Texas, right. I'm from Texas."},{"startTime":590.84,"endTime":593.843,"body":"I believe the Hard Rock Hotel."},{"startTime":593.843,"endTime":594.969,"body":"Yeah, I think so."},{"startTime":594.969,"endTime":598.18,"body":"But in her like autopsy,"},{"startTime":594.969,"endTime":598.18,"body":"which I've, of course, read, they."},{"startTime":598.18,"endTime":600.224,"body":"Have. Then or. I don't."},{"startTime":600.224,"endTime":600.391,"body":"Know."},{"startTime":600.391,"endTime":604.854,"body":"Can you can you see the contents of her"},{"startTime":600.391,"endTime":604.854,"body":"stomach when you."},{"startTime":604.979,"endTime":605.646,"body":"they tell you everything."},{"startTime":605.646,"endTime":606.23,"body":"Okay."},{"startTime":606.23,"endTime":610.818,"body":"I'm just."},{"startTime":610.901,"endTime":613.487,"body":"And the whole room is"},{"startTime":613.487,"endTime":615.74,"body":"like the TV really loud."},{"startTime":615.74,"endTime":616.699,"body":"Shades drawn."},{"startTime":616.699,"endTime":620.077,"body":"All the lights off"},{"startTime":616.699,"endTime":620.077,"body":"and the A.C., as in really cold."},{"startTime":620.077,"endTime":623.331,"body":"And that sounds like a weird way to go,"},{"startTime":620.077,"endTime":623.331,"body":"right?"},{"startTime":623.331,"endTime":624.081,"body":"That's okay."},{"startTime":624.081,"endTime":625.499,"body":"But it was in a hotel room."},{"startTime":625.499,"endTime":627.209,"body":"Yeah. That always makes it sad."},{"startTime":627.209,"endTime":630.588,"body":"I mean, I guess unless it's"},{"startTime":627.209,"endTime":630.588,"body":"a really nice hotel, but still,"},{"startTime":630.588,"endTime":633.591,"body":"it's no matter what, you know,"},{"startTime":630.588,"endTime":633.591,"body":"it sounds sad when you read that."},{"startTime":633.716,"endTime":635.092,"body":"Someone has to clean it up."},{"startTime":635.092,"endTime":638.22,"body":"No, but just that makes it sound like this"},{"startTime":635.092,"endTime":638.22,"body":"person's alone."},{"startTime":638.22,"endTime":639.18,"body":"They're depressed."},{"startTime":639.18,"endTime":642.475,"body":"They're in a hotel."},{"startTime":639.18,"endTime":642.475,"body":"good. Yeah. Same thing."},{"startTime":642.683,"endTime":645.353,"body":"Yeah, yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":645.353,"endTime":646.354,"body":"This is what I love about."},{"startTime":646.354,"endTime":648.356,"body":"Well, it's different scenario"},{"startTime":646.354,"endTime":648.356,"body":"because it's suicide, but it's."},{"startTime":648.356,"endTime":650.066,"body":"I love about Chris Cornell."},{"startTime":650.066,"endTime":652.026,"body":"I like left a no."},{"startTime":652.026,"endTime":654.528,"body":"Just say like,"},{"startTime":652.026,"endTime":654.528,"body":"don't come in, call the police."},{"startTime":654.528,"endTime":659.283,"body":"He was like thinking"},{"startTime":654.528,"endTime":659.283,"body":"of the housekeeper is very."},{"startTime":659.367,"endTime":661.744,"body":"yeah, that is nice."},{"startTime":661.744,"endTime":662.536,"body":"That's in Detroit."},{"startTime":662.536,"endTime":664.538,"body":"And he was in a very fancy hotel, right?"},{"startTime":664.538,"endTime":669.46,"body":"MGM Yeah, because we drove past it"},{"startTime":664.538,"endTime":669.46,"body":"and Chris Cornell."},{"startTime":669.543,"endTime":671.087,"body":"but still, it's in Vegas."},{"startTime":671.087,"endTime":673.464,"body":"No, no, no. In Detroit."},{"startTime":673.464,"endTime":674.84,"body":"the MGM In Detroit? Yeah."},{"startTime":674.84,"endTime":677.843,"body":"I didn't know them even fancier."},{"startTime":678.052,"endTime":679.595,"body":"well, maybe that's."},{"startTime":679.595,"endTime":681.597,"body":"Maybe I have to rethink it."},{"startTime":681.597,"endTime":685.059,"body":"We drove past it, and one of the reason"},{"startTime":681.597,"endTime":685.059,"body":"the car signaled to us"},{"startTime":685.059,"endTime":686.06,"body":"that it was evacuated is."},{"startTime":686.06,"endTime":690.815,"body":"yeah, it's room 1136."},{"startTime":690.856,"endTime":692.858,"body":"your brain is just terrifying."},{"startTime":692.858,"endTime":696.278,"body":"But the Whitney room at the Beverly"},{"startTime":692.858,"endTime":696.278,"body":"Hilton is unavailable."},{"startTime":696.529,"endTime":698.03,"body":"That's good. She'll be available."},{"startTime":698.03,"endTime":699.99,"body":"No, I mean."},{"startTime":699.99,"endTime":702.284,"body":"Some creepy ghost hunters."},{"startTime":702.284,"endTime":703.703,"body":"Do you stay in there?"},{"startTime":703.703,"endTime":706.163,"body":"Yeah. Cable in. Whitney's room."},{"startTime":703.703,"endTime":706.163,"body":"I agree with."},{"startTime":706.163,"endTime":708.749,"body":"You know,"},{"startTime":706.163,"endTime":708.749,"body":"I always feel like a hotel would be safe."},{"startTime":708.749,"endTime":711.752,"body":"I've had a couple of that small"},{"startTime":708.749,"endTime":711.752,"body":"that seem like it's happening."},{"startTime":712.002,"endTime":714.922,"body":"no. Yeah, there was, like, a while."},{"startTime":714.922,"endTime":717.341,"body":"I just had, like,"},{"startTime":714.922,"endTime":717.341,"body":"I think, migraines that just like,"},{"startTime":717.341,"endTime":721.053,"body":"an intense head pain"},{"startTime":717.341,"endTime":721.053,"body":"when I was on the road"},{"startTime":721.137,"endTime":725.057,"body":"and I was in Alameda,"},{"startTime":721.137,"endTime":725.057,"body":"the Bay Area in like a Holiday"},{"startTime":725.057,"endTime":728.185,"body":"Inn or whatever, and I was like,"},{"startTime":725.057,"endTime":728.185,"body":"I won't have an aneurysm probably."},{"startTime":728.185,"endTime":731.188,"body":"And then I'll find me"},{"startTime":728.185,"endTime":731.188,"body":"and I'm not at a Holiday Inn."},{"startTime":731.313,"endTime":734.191,"body":"Boy, this is gold. You know this."},{"startTime":734.191,"endTime":736.068,"body":"I don't know if you haven't."},{"startTime":736.068,"endTime":738.487,"body":"I mean, how can I not step in this now?"},{"startTime":738.487,"endTime":739.238,"body":"You're always."},{"startTime":739.238,"endTime":744.744,"body":"I. Know, Daniel, tease me because I did"},{"startTime":739.238,"endTime":744.744,"body":"have a brain aneurysm in 2020, and."},{"startTime":744.744,"endTime":748.205,"body":"I'm lucky I wasn't in a hotel room"},{"startTime":744.744,"endTime":748.205,"body":"by myself because I would have died."},{"startTime":748.205,"endTime":751.834,"body":"I was here with my husband,"},{"startTime":748.205,"endTime":751.834,"body":"and he took me to the emergency,"},{"startTime":751.834,"endTime":755.713,"body":"and I had brain surgery,"},{"startTime":751.834,"endTime":755.713,"body":"and I, I and I believe I lived."},{"startTime":755.713,"endTime":760.342,"body":"Unless this is some weird purgatory."},{"startTime":760.384,"endTime":760.926,"body":"No idea."},{"startTime":760.926,"endTime":761.886,"body":"That's so scary."},{"startTime":761.886,"endTime":763.471,"body":"Yeah, Yeah, I'm afraid."},{"startTime":763.471,"endTime":766.766,"body":"But I have to, Amy. To be alone."},{"startTime":763.471,"endTime":766.766,"body":"Yeah, but."},{"startTime":766.849,"endTime":768.225,"body":"I mean, you have to."},{"startTime":768.225,"endTime":771.228,"body":"I When this is over,"},{"startTime":768.225,"endTime":771.228,"body":"I'm going to give you my."},{"startTime":771.228,"endTime":773.022,"body":"The neurologist and all that stuff."},{"startTime":773.022,"endTime":775.775,"body":"Because if you even"},{"startTime":773.022,"endTime":775.775,"body":"if you're not having migraines anymore,"},{"startTime":775.775,"endTime":777.234,"body":"you need to get checked out."},{"startTime":777.234,"endTime":780.237,"body":"I know. And I do have nerve issues."},{"startTime":780.362,"endTime":781.322,"body":"gosh. Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":781.322,"endTime":783.073,"body":"cause you might need to be on"},{"startTime":783.073,"endTime":785.242,"body":"some kind of medication"},{"startTime":783.073,"endTime":785.242,"body":"that you don't even know about."},{"startTime":785.242,"endTime":788.954,"body":"That's even even something mild"},{"startTime":785.242,"endTime":788.954,"body":"like after having brain"},{"startTime":789.038,"endTime":793.584,"body":"surgery, all they wanted me to do"},{"startTime":789.038,"endTime":793.584,"body":"is take two baby aspirin a day."},{"startTime":793.584,"endTime":795.044,"body":"And then one other thing."},{"startTime":795.044,"endTime":798.589,"body":"But I was and I could go back to my own"},{"startTime":795.044,"endTime":798.589,"body":"antidepressants, but."},{"startTime":798.589,"endTime":799.924,"body":"It's like I'm not going to."},{"startTime":799.924,"endTime":802.051,"body":"Yeah, that makes me high. Yeah."},{"startTime":802.051,"endTime":804.72,"body":"Yeah. But"},{"startTime":804.804,"endTime":805.429,"body":"they gave me, like,"},{"startTime":805.429,"endTime":808.724,"body":"gabapentin,"},{"startTime":805.429,"endTime":808.724,"body":"which is like a dog medication."},{"startTime":808.766,"endTime":809.85,"body":"Really?"},{"startTime":809.85,"endTime":811.56,"body":"really? I want to name my."},{"startTime":811.56,"endTime":815.189,"body":"Next dog just for, like, nerve pain,"},{"startTime":811.56,"endTime":815.189,"body":"but it's like, Yeah, I don't."},{"startTime":815.272,"endTime":818.275,"body":"It just so I'm like, I want to get to"},{"startTime":815.272,"endTime":818.275,"body":"the root of what's going on."},{"startTime":818.442,"endTime":821.821,"body":"Yeah,"},{"startTime":818.442,"endTime":821.821,"body":"like a very easy to prescribe medication."},{"startTime":821.821,"endTime":823.405,"body":"I think I'm going to take this."},{"startTime":823.405,"endTime":824.49,"body":"Do you get it at your temple?"},{"startTime":824.49,"endTime":826.742,"body":"Where do you get the bad, bad"},{"startTime":824.49,"endTime":826.742,"body":"headaches in right in front."},{"startTime":826.742,"endTime":829.954,"body":"Of back left, which it's been a long time."},{"startTime":829.954,"endTime":833.499,"body":"I also found out in other ways"},{"startTime":829.954,"endTime":833.499,"body":"that I just have like nerve damage."},{"startTime":833.499,"endTime":836.21,"body":"I have like back issue and shit."},{"startTime":836.21,"endTime":837.586,"body":"Okay. I worked with this too."},{"startTime":837.586,"endTime":840.714,"body":"She had no personality to begin with."},{"startTime":840.714,"endTime":845.594,"body":"She was a nice person, but he was a mellow"},{"startTime":840.714,"endTime":845.594,"body":"old thing that you could not like tried."},{"startTime":845.636,"endTime":848.514,"body":"And he had, you know, he had a"},{"startTime":845.636,"endTime":848.514,"body":"he hit a nerve thing"},{"startTime":848.514,"endTime":851.517,"body":"happening"},{"startTime":848.514,"endTime":851.517,"body":"that causes incredible pain in his."},{"startTime":851.642,"endTime":854.937,"body":"He would drink like a what's"},{"startTime":851.642,"endTime":854.937,"body":"the big thing of beer like an 18 pack."},{"startTime":855.02,"endTime":856.814,"body":"He kill 19 pack every day."},{"startTime":856.814,"endTime":858.774,"body":"my God. I'm like that kind of shit."},{"startTime":858.774,"endTime":860.86,"body":"Case."},{"startTime":860.86,"endTime":862.528,"body":"Every day."},{"startTime":862.528,"endTime":865.823,"body":"But then to to fix the nerve thing."},{"startTime":865.823,"endTime":866.657,"body":"They prescribed him"},{"startTime":866.657,"endTime":870.703,"body":"methadone, which I was like,"},{"startTime":866.657,"endTime":870.703,"body":"The dude already has no personality."},{"startTime":870.744,"endTime":874.456,"body":"shit. Further reduce this guy. my God."},{"startTime":874.54,"endTime":874.999,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":874.999,"endTime":878.002,"body":"Watching a full grown adult"},{"startTime":874.999,"endTime":878.002,"body":"just walk into a wall."},{"startTime":878.252,"endTime":879.086,"body":"I'm very like."},{"startTime":879.086,"endTime":881.297,"body":"I just don't trust."},{"startTime":881.297,"endTime":883.465,"body":"I trust doctors."},{"startTime":883.465,"endTime":887.469,"body":"I don't trust just sort of the willy"},{"startTime":883.465,"endTime":887.469,"body":"nilly, like, prescribing of whatever."},{"startTime":887.469,"endTime":889.346,"body":"Like, this is probably what it is. Yeah."},{"startTime":889.346,"endTime":891.724,"body":"I take that. I'm like,"},{"startTime":889.346,"endTime":891.724,"body":"I'm not going to go."},{"startTime":891.724,"endTime":895.936,"body":"Yeah, and I did"},{"startTime":891.724,"endTime":895.936,"body":"and I did for like about a week."},{"startTime":895.936,"endTime":897.313,"body":"And I actually was sleeping very well."},{"startTime":897.313,"endTime":899.565,"body":"So I was like, Ooh,"},{"startTime":897.313,"endTime":899.565,"body":"I love pharmaceuticals."},{"startTime":899.565,"endTime":901.15,"body":"Yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":901.15,"endTime":904.069,"body":"But I had something on stage where"},{"startTime":904.069,"endTime":907.489,"body":"and this never happens where I just"},{"startTime":904.069,"endTime":907.489,"body":"literally, like, forgot the end of a joke."},{"startTime":907.489,"endTime":909.658,"body":"I'm sure it's going to start to happen"},{"startTime":907.489,"endTime":909.658,"body":"more and more."},{"startTime":909.658,"endTime":911.201,"body":"Just not time. Yeah, Yeah."},{"startTime":911.201,"endTime":916.04,"body":"But then I went on, like,"},{"startTime":911.201,"endTime":916.04,"body":"read it where I find all my information."},{"startTime":916.123,"endTime":919.793,"body":"Ha. Read about like Gabapentin side"},{"startTime":916.123,"endTime":919.793,"body":"effects and all these people were like,"},{"startTime":919.793,"endTime":924.632,"body":"I just keep forgetting I'm clumsy"},{"startTime":919.793,"endTime":924.632,"body":"and I'm like, well, this is my job."},{"startTime":924.632,"endTime":927.718,"body":"So I'm not like,"},{"startTime":924.632,"endTime":927.718,"body":"I can't risk that Gabapentin."},{"startTime":927.76,"endTime":931.722,"body":"Yeah, they do give it to,"},{"startTime":927.76,"endTime":931.722,"body":"like, old dogs to go to sleep."},{"startTime":931.805,"endTime":934.35,"body":"shit. No, just to mellow out."},{"startTime":934.35,"endTime":935.726,"body":"Yeah. Like, you know."},{"startTime":935.726,"endTime":935.935,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":935.935,"endTime":937.603,"body":"Fireworks or whatever."},{"startTime":937.603,"endTime":940.981,"body":"Yeah. So you are a up all night."},{"startTime":940.981,"endTime":941.857,"body":"You're a night owl."},{"startTime":941.857,"endTime":946.111,"body":"Is. Yours for lack of sleep"},{"startTime":941.857,"endTime":946.111,"body":"or lack of or inability sleeping."},{"startTime":946.195,"endTime":947.279,"body":"Yeah. Please do."},{"startTime":947.279,"endTime":948.864,"body":"No, I don't know what the hell it is."},{"startTime":948.864,"endTime":952.618,"body":"I've decided that I'm the the state,"},{"startTime":948.864,"endTime":952.618,"body":"the new state animal,"},{"startTime":952.618,"endTime":956.58,"body":"which is the pallid bat,"},{"startTime":952.618,"endTime":956.58,"body":"which is, like I was saying, like,"},{"startTime":956.58,"endTime":959.583,"body":"I can't get a color in my face"},{"startTime":956.58,"endTime":959.583,"body":"unless it's a rash."},{"startTime":959.667,"endTime":963.295,"body":"And this bat is purely like a white. Bat."},{"startTime":963.379,"endTime":966.173,"body":"And it's, you know, sleep all day"},{"startTime":963.379,"endTime":966.173,"body":"and then up all night."},{"startTime":966.173,"endTime":968.092,"body":"But yeah, I don't know."},{"startTime":966.173,"endTime":968.092,"body":"I think I've always been that way."},{"startTime":968.092,"endTime":969.385,"body":"I've always been that way."},{"startTime":969.385,"endTime":974.89,"body":"Like my mom was saying, like when she tried to get me up in the morning preschool"},{"startTime":974.932,"endTime":976.35,"body":"that she'd like, have to shake me."},{"startTime":976.35,"endTime":979.186,"body":"And then I"},{"startTime":976.35,"endTime":979.186,"body":"and then I remembered there was a baby."},{"startTime":979.186,"endTime":982.189,"body":"And I know. Yeah, please."},{"startTime":982.189,"endTime":984.692,"body":"I know, I know."},{"startTime":984.692,"endTime":985.901,"body":"And I."},{"startTime":985.901,"endTime":988.821,"body":"I was, I remember like, being."},{"startTime":988.821,"endTime":990.698,"body":"I remember being, like, a teenager."},{"startTime":990.698,"endTime":993.909,"body":"I was probably like, you know, 13 or 14,"},{"startTime":990.698,"endTime":993.909,"body":"and she was like, trying to get me up"},{"startTime":994.159,"endTime":997.579,"body":"and I pretended I was having a dream"},{"startTime":994.159,"endTime":997.579,"body":"so that I can punch her"},{"startTime":997.579,"endTime":1000.708,"body":"in the face or like,"},{"startTime":997.579,"endTime":1000.708,"body":"I slapped her in the face."},{"startTime":1000.708,"endTime":1001.667,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1001.667,"endTime":1004.086,"body":"You are naturally nocturnal. Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":1004.086,"endTime":1005.879,"body":"You sleep usually better."},{"startTime":1005.879,"endTime":1008.007,"body":"yeah, yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":1008.007,"endTime":1010.342,"body":"You can't always do because of life."},{"startTime":1010.342,"endTime":1014.179,"body":"So, like school, college, working."},{"startTime":1014.221,"endTime":1016.265,"body":"You know, I was a teacher for some time."},{"startTime":1016.265,"endTime":1018.642,"body":"man, I was tired all the time."},{"startTime":1018.642,"endTime":1021.52,"body":"Now, this. Is the perfect job. Job? Yeah."},{"startTime":1021.52,"endTime":1023.647,"body":"Yeah. Stumbled into a good job for us."},{"startTime":1023.647,"endTime":1027.693,"body":"Yeah, but I've finally gotten rid"},{"startTime":1023.647,"endTime":1027.693,"body":"of, like, the guilt about it."},{"startTime":1027.776,"endTime":1031.113,"body":"I'm like, if I had a writing job or"},{"startTime":1027.776,"endTime":1031.113,"body":"somewhere I need to be, I will be there."},{"startTime":1031.238,"endTime":1032.781,"body":"Yeah, Yeah."},{"startTime":1032.781,"endTime":1035.451,"body":"Corporate jobs"},{"startTime":1032.781,"endTime":1035.451,"body":"and non profit, everything for years."},{"startTime":1035.451,"endTime":1036.869,"body":"Yeah, I was tired."},{"startTime":1036.869,"endTime":1040.956,"body":"Yeah, but if I don't have to get up"},{"startTime":1036.869,"endTime":1040.956,"body":"for something, I'm just not going to."},{"startTime":1041.081,"endTime":1043.042,"body":"Yeah. Sleep to live."},{"startTime":1043.042,"endTime":1044.334,"body":"And it's funny."},{"startTime":1044.334,"endTime":1047.588,"body":"People do make you feel. are you up? No."},{"startTime":1047.588,"endTime":1053.093,"body":"And you've known me for 30 years, you know"},{"startTime":1047.588,"endTime":1053.093,"body":"I'm not up because I go to bed at 4 a.m."},{"startTime":1053.177,"endTime":1056.013,"body":"and so don't call me at 10 a.m."},{"startTime":1056.013,"endTime":1058.64,"body":"or 9 a.m.."},{"startTime":1056.013,"endTime":1058.64,"body":"Yeah, I'm always. Like a four to noon."},{"startTime":1058.64,"endTime":1059.85,"body":"Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":1059.85,"endTime":1062.478,"body":"Schedule sucks when you go east."},{"startTime":1062.478,"endTime":1065.481,"body":"Yeah. Yeah. You're like 3 p.m.."},{"startTime":1062.478,"endTime":1065.481,"body":"Yeah. Okay."},{"startTime":1065.481,"endTime":1068.025,"body":"Dad was a hardcore like, PBS person."},{"startTime":1068.025,"endTime":1071.111,"body":"Also,"},{"startTime":1068.025,"endTime":1071.111,"body":"the only music everyone's into is opera."},{"startTime":1071.195,"endTime":1072.196,"body":"Don't even ask me what it is."},{"startTime":1072.196,"endTime":1074.531,"body":"But there's an opera"},{"startTime":1072.196,"endTime":1074.531,"body":"where there's a like a queen of."},{"startTime":1074.531,"endTime":1075.574,"body":"Them."},{"startTime":1075.574,"endTime":1081.08,"body":"Comes out and has this long,"},{"startTime":1075.574,"endTime":1081.08,"body":"drab, sad song where she's really pale."},{"startTime":1081.08,"endTime":1086.293,"body":"Like, come out at night"},{"startTime":1081.08,"endTime":1086.293,"body":"and that made me gay also."},{"startTime":1086.376,"endTime":1087.252,"body":"And I'm like."},{"startTime":1087.252,"endTime":1088.587,"body":"Maybe I'm a queen of the moon."},{"startTime":1088.587,"endTime":1092.966,"body":"It made me romanticize."},{"startTime":1093.05,"endTime":1093.884,"body":"I like that."},{"startTime":1093.884,"endTime":1094.593,"body":"Made of marble."},{"startTime":1094.593,"endTime":1098.972,"body":"And like, I was in Beijing in 2016."},{"startTime":1099.056,"endTime":1100.974,"body":"Beijing hard."},{"startTime":1100.974,"endTime":1102.351,"body":"Beijing, Beijing."},{"startTime":1102.351,"endTime":1102.976,"body":"Sorry."},{"startTime":1102.976,"endTime":1105.979,"body":"Yeah, I've been saying they."},{"startTime":1106.188,"endTime":1107.815,"body":"I feel like. A little song after."},{"startTime":1107.815,"endTime":1109.358,"body":"It was really weird."},{"startTime":1109.358,"endTime":1111.318,"body":"I was in Beijing."},{"startTime":1111.318,"endTime":1112.027,"body":"Beijing?"},{"startTime":1112.027,"endTime":1114.613,"body":"How come? Look, both of you."},{"startTime":1114.613,"endTime":1118.117,"body":"I was there."},{"startTime":1114.613,"endTime":1118.117,"body":"Let me pronounce it how I want."},{"startTime":1118.2,"endTime":1120.577,"body":"And I had no jet lag."},{"startTime":1120.577,"endTime":1124.832,"body":"And I realized"},{"startTime":1120.577,"endTime":1124.832,"body":"it wasn't like I'm getting jetlag."},{"startTime":1125.082,"endTime":1127.459,"body":"Yeah, Yeah."},{"startTime":1127.459,"endTime":1128.836,"body":"But I think."},{"startTime":1128.836,"endTime":1130.838,"body":"I think it was because."},{"startTime":1130.838,"endTime":1132.422,"body":"You were on your show. Yes."},{"startTime":1132.422,"endTime":1134.174,"body":"I got to go to Beijing."},{"startTime":1134.174,"endTime":1137.302,"body":"Yes. On really? Eastern time. Yeah."},{"startTime":1137.427,"endTime":1138.846,"body":"I mean, maybe it would be the same anyway."},{"startTime":1138.846,"endTime":1144.977,"body":"Like, I feel like even in, you know,"},{"startTime":1138.846,"endTime":1144.977,"body":"going to London anywhere,"},{"startTime":1145.06,"endTime":1148.397,"body":"I'm just like, I'm not supposed to be here"},{"startTime":1145.06,"endTime":1148.397,"body":"in the United States or, I."},{"startTime":1148.397,"endTime":1151.024,"body":"Don't know, West Coast time"},{"startTime":1148.397,"endTime":1151.024,"body":"and Hawaii time."},{"startTime":1151.024,"endTime":1153.277,"body":"You better like,"},{"startTime":1151.024,"endTime":1153.277,"body":"let the rest of the world."},{"startTime":1153.277,"endTime":1157.156,"body":"That works well for me because then I am"},{"startTime":1153.277,"endTime":1157.156,"body":"kind of getting up in the morning."},{"startTime":1157.156,"endTime":1159.491,"body":"Yeah, Yeah, perfect."},{"startTime":1157.156,"endTime":1159.491,"body":"You were just in Hawaii."},{"startTime":1159.491,"endTime":1160.617,"body":"Did you do stand up year?"},{"startTime":1160.617,"endTime":1163.37,"body":"They came. No,"},{"startTime":1160.617,"endTime":1163.37,"body":"just vacation for my birthday."},{"startTime":1163.37,"endTime":1165.831,"body":"one was your birthday. New Year's Eve."},{"startTime":1165.831,"endTime":1170.169,"body":"Happy birthday to you."},{"startTime":1170.169,"endTime":1174.047,"body":"well, we ate like some of the best food."},{"startTime":1174.131,"endTime":1174.673,"body":"Did you have, like,"},{"startTime":1174.673,"endTime":1177.885,"body":"a marley thought out"},{"startTime":1174.673,"endTime":1177.885,"body":"as you all that shit or it's no puff?"},{"startTime":1177.968,"endTime":1182.472,"body":"No, no, let's not that smell like flaky."},{"startTime":1182.472,"endTime":1185.392,"body":"Almost frozen. Gone."},{"startTime":1185.392,"endTime":1188.395,"body":"no. Ooh, Sounds good."},{"startTime":1188.395,"endTime":1189.646,"body":"From a lot. Too much custard."},{"startTime":1189.646,"endTime":1192.065,"body":"And then I should send out a sugar."},{"startTime":1189.646,"endTime":1192.065,"body":"I thought."},{"startTime":1192.065,"endTime":1192.774,"body":"That sounds good."},{"startTime":1192.774,"endTime":1197.738,"body":"Yeah, we have, like, a lot of sushi,"},{"startTime":1192.774,"endTime":1197.738,"body":"which is very good Izakaya place."},{"startTime":1197.821,"endTime":1199.99,"body":"And I just ate, like, so much spam."},{"startTime":1199.99,"endTime":1202.451,"body":"This would be from 7-Eleven."},{"startTime":1202.451,"endTime":1203.785,"body":"Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":1203.785,"endTime":1205.579,"body":"no. Where exactly were you? In Hawaii."},{"startTime":1205.579,"endTime":1208.54,"body":"nice."},{"startTime":1208.624,"endTime":1212.252,"body":"A quick little last minute trip,"},{"startTime":1208.624,"endTime":1212.252,"body":"and it was so nice."},{"startTime":1212.336,"endTime":1217.09,"body":"We were just hopping like beach chairs"},{"startTime":1212.336,"endTime":1217.09,"body":"that weren't rs we didn't pay for."},{"startTime":1217.216,"endTime":1218.759,"body":"Yeah, And then I couldn't."},{"startTime":1218.759,"endTime":1222.512,"body":"It's so funny because, like most people,"},{"startTime":1218.759,"endTime":1222.512,"body":"normal people are just like,"},{"startTime":1222.596,"endTime":1223.68,"body":"hey, these are our chairs."},{"startTime":1223.68,"endTime":1226.85,"body":"And you're like, Miami, dude. Like, oops."},{"startTime":1226.975,"endTime":1231.271,"body":"And then you move. But one lady was so mad"},{"startTime":1231.313,"endTime":1233.232,"body":"that I started laughing."},{"startTime":1233.232,"endTime":1234.191,"body":"Ha ha."},{"startTime":1234.191,"endTime":1237.027,"body":"She was with her"},{"startTime":1234.191,"endTime":1237.027,"body":"teenage daughter, was mortified. Yes."},{"startTime":1237.027,"endTime":1240.239,"body":"And I was just like,"},{"startTime":1237.027,"endTime":1240.239,"body":"wait, are you are you serious right now?"},{"startTime":1240.239,"endTime":1241.281,"body":"Like, you're really upset?"},{"startTime":1241.281,"endTime":1242.866,"body":"And she was like, Who does this?"},{"startTime":1242.866,"endTime":1244.91,"body":"Like,"},{"startTime":1242.866,"endTime":1244.91,"body":"she called us like, savages was like."},{"startTime":1244.91,"endTime":1246.078,"body":"my God."},{"startTime":1246.078,"endTime":1248.83,"body":"And then why are you just like,"},{"startTime":1246.078,"endTime":1248.83,"body":"we're moving."},{"startTime":1248.83,"endTime":1251.833,"body":"Like, I like, I can't believe"},{"startTime":1248.83,"endTime":1251.833,"body":"you live your life this way."},{"startTime":1252.0,"endTime":1252.376,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1252.376,"endTime":1255.963,"body":"Getting progressively mad"},{"startTime":1252.376,"endTime":1255.963,"body":"or how funny I thought it was."},{"startTime":1256.046,"endTime":1260.425,"body":"And then she goes, and you sat on her"},{"startTime":1256.046,"endTime":1260.425,"body":"towels, and I was like, I'm"},{"startTime":1260.425,"endTime":1265.138,"body":"pretty sure they'll give you a new towels"},{"startTime":1260.425,"endTime":1265.138,"body":"because you paid $100"},{"startTime":1265.222,"endTime":1267.975,"body":"genuinely upset that you got got."},{"startTime":1267.975,"endTime":1269.226,"body":"And we didn't pay"},{"startTime":1269.226,"endTime":1271.52,"body":"because you don't actually have to"},{"startTime":1269.226,"endTime":1271.52,"body":"because they're not going"},{"startTime":1271.52,"endTime":1273.855,"body":"to throw us in jail"},{"startTime":1271.52,"endTime":1273.855,"body":"for sitting on that chair."},{"startTime":1273.855,"endTime":1276.275,"body":"Yeah, yeah. Our towels."},{"startTime":1276.275,"endTime":1280.904,"body":"And my boyfriend was like,"},{"startTime":1276.275,"endTime":1280.904,"body":"Yeah, like I put my ass all over."},{"startTime":1280.988,"endTime":1286.994,"body":"I And this furious"},{"startTime":1280.988,"endTime":1286.994,"body":"woman goes, Yeah, that delicious."},{"startTime":1287.077,"endTime":1287.411,"body":"that was"},{"startTime":1287.411,"endTime":1290.747,"body":"like Erin, Only you would be complimented."},{"startTime":1290.747,"endTime":1294.376,"body":"Wow. This anger a major."},{"startTime":1294.459,"endTime":1297.212,"body":"Wow. Yeah."},{"startTime":1297.212,"endTime":1298.964,"body":"She just said you are delicious."},{"startTime":1298.964,"endTime":1300.674,"body":"I am sure does."},{"startTime":1300.674,"endTime":1302.592,"body":"Wow. First the comment."},{"startTime":1302.592,"endTime":1305.595,"body":"That shit I like,"},{"startTime":1302.592,"endTime":1305.595,"body":"no matter how mad people are"},{"startTime":1305.595,"endTime":1308.89,"body":"and they're never actually math"},{"startTime":1305.595,"endTime":1308.89,"body":"like that always happens."},{"startTime":1308.89,"endTime":1311.268,"body":"Jeez."},{"startTime":1311.268,"endTime":1311.81,"body":"yeah, of course."},{"startTime":1311.81,"endTime":1313.687,"body":"So whenever I Yeah."},{"startTime":1313.687,"endTime":1315.564,"body":"I know me when."},{"startTime":1315.564,"endTime":1318.942,"body":"Like an irate customer"},{"startTime":1315.564,"endTime":1318.942,"body":"I just sat and watched."},{"startTime":1318.942,"endTime":1322.154,"body":"I love if someone wanted to bitch"},{"startTime":1318.942,"endTime":1322.154,"body":"about fill in the blank whatever was going"},{"startTime":1322.154,"endTime":1323.071,"body":"wrong."},{"startTime":1323.071,"endTime":1326.074,"body":"Like these are black olives,"},{"startTime":1323.071,"endTime":1326.074,"body":"green olives is."},{"startTime":1326.116,"endTime":1328.785,"body":"They say that the greatest insult"},{"startTime":1328.785,"endTime":1332.622,"body":"is indifference"},{"startTime":1328.785,"endTime":1332.622,"body":"above the shit out of people."},{"startTime":1332.622,"endTime":1335.0,"body":"If you just don't react, that's there."},{"startTime":1335.0,"endTime":1339.379,"body":"That's how much you can really hurt people"},{"startTime":1335.0,"endTime":1339.379,"body":"by going, Yeah, they want to."},{"startTime":1339.379,"endTime":1342.341,"body":"Fight. Yeah, yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":1339.379,"endTime":1342.341,"body":"And I'll keep pushing it too."},{"startTime":1342.341,"endTime":1344.593,"body":"I felt so much for her daughter,"},{"startTime":1342.341,"endTime":1344.593,"body":"so I was like,"},{"startTime":1344.593,"endTime":1345.469,"body":"I bet you've been through this."},{"startTime":1345.469,"endTime":1349.514,"body":"And yeah, I was also like,"},{"startTime":1345.469,"endTime":1349.514,"body":"Sorry, that's your mom."},{"startTime":1349.514,"endTime":1353.602,"body":"she probably just embarrasses her"},{"startTime":1349.514,"endTime":1353.602,"body":"everywhere."},{"startTime":1353.602,"endTime":1356.897,"body":"I was in a band"},{"startTime":1353.602,"endTime":1356.897,"body":"and his girlfriend was kind of psycho,"},{"startTime":1356.897,"endTime":1358.19,"body":"but whatever one of the bandmates."},{"startTime":1358.19,"endTime":1362.903,"body":"But she would come in real"},{"startTime":1358.19,"endTime":1362.903,"body":"handy sometimes and it was"},{"startTime":1362.986,"endTime":1365.238,"body":"fun and"},{"startTime":1362.986,"endTime":1365.238,"body":"we're trying to just get out on the road."},{"startTime":1365.238,"endTime":1367.991,"body":"But we blocked the crosswalk"},{"startTime":1365.238,"endTime":1367.991,"body":"and this lady just for"},{"startTime":1367.991,"endTime":1369.951,"body":"she and her family,"},{"startTime":1367.991,"endTime":1369.951,"body":"she just stop everything."},{"startTime":1369.951,"endTime":1372.954,"body":"You ran the crosswalk"},{"startTime":1372.954,"endTime":1375.374,"body":"and so we it's like inches, right? Yeah."},{"startTime":1375.374,"endTime":1377.084,"body":"And meanwhile,"},{"startTime":1375.374,"endTime":1377.084,"body":"her kids are just mortified, right?"},{"startTime":1377.084,"endTime":1378.668,"body":"Yeah. So she just sits there and waits."},{"startTime":1378.668,"endTime":1379.419,"body":"We back up"},{"startTime":1379.419,"endTime":1383.006,"body":"and then she continues, They're like,"},{"startTime":1379.419,"endTime":1383.006,"body":"Nobody should be in a crowd or walking."},{"startTime":1383.09,"endTime":1385.217,"body":"my God, Sometimes you can't back up."},{"startTime":1385.217,"endTime":1387.177,"body":"I've done that. And I was like, shit,"},{"startTime":1385.217,"endTime":1387.177,"body":"I am kind of far out."},{"startTime":1387.177,"endTime":1388.678,"body":"And then there's somebody"},{"startTime":1387.177,"endTime":1388.678,"body":"right up your ass."},{"startTime":1388.678,"endTime":1388.887,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1388.887,"endTime":1390.889,"body":"Just blindly into traffic."},{"startTime":1390.889,"endTime":1392.057,"body":"Like, What do you want, bitch?"},{"startTime":1392.057,"endTime":1394.184,"body":"But so we're just all sitting in silence."},{"startTime":1394.184,"endTime":1397.187,"body":"And then as the family passes by,"},{"startTime":1394.184,"endTime":1397.187,"body":"forget the girlfriend goes."},{"startTime":1397.396,"endTime":1401.4,"body":"Your mom's a con. Are."},{"startTime":1401.483,"endTime":1403.068,"body":"And I was like,"},{"startTime":1403.068,"endTime":1404.069,"body":"that were right."},{"startTime":1404.069,"endTime":1405.987,"body":"I've done that kind of a lot."},{"startTime":1405.987,"endTime":1411.201,"body":"Like, like there's, like a, there's"},{"startTime":1405.987,"endTime":1411.201,"body":"a smart and final remix in my house"},{"startTime":1411.284,"endTime":1415.372,"body":"where they haven't put like a speedbump"},{"startTime":1411.284,"endTime":1415.372,"body":"or a stop by or anything coming out of."},{"startTime":1415.455,"endTime":1419.126,"body":"You didn't tell me she was all about"},{"startTime":1415.455,"endTime":1419.126,"body":"name dropping, but go on, go on."},{"startTime":1419.209,"endTime":1421.086,"body":"Which"},{"startTime":1421.086,"endTime":1424.089,"body":"and stuff and go."},{"startTime":1424.214,"endTime":1425.09,"body":"That's I. Intercut."},{"startTime":1425.09,"endTime":1427.426,"body":"It's just, you know, people just like"},{"startTime":1427.426,"endTime":1431.221,"body":"come out of there onto the sidewalk,"},{"startTime":1427.426,"endTime":1431.221,"body":"like at 40 miles an hour."},{"startTime":1431.304,"endTime":1432.722,"body":"Yeah. It's not final."},{"startTime":1432.722,"endTime":1433.64,"body":"You better do something."},{"startTime":1433.64,"endTime":1434.057,"body":"Do better?"},{"startTime":1434.057,"endTime":1437.394,"body":"Yeah. We'll be writing a letter. Laura."},{"startTime":1437.477,"endTime":1438.854,"body":"Yes, please."},{"startTime":1438.854,"endTime":1440.981,"body":"I'll take the blame."},{"startTime":1440.981,"endTime":1442.315,"body":"It's probably me."},{"startTime":1442.315,"endTime":1446.069,"body":"A dad with, like, a nine year"},{"startTime":1442.315,"endTime":1446.069,"body":"old son in a convertible,"},{"startTime":1446.153,"endTime":1447.863,"body":"and I've almost been hit there."},{"startTime":1447.863,"endTime":1450.866,"body":"A trillion, so I'm aware of it."},{"startTime":1450.866,"endTime":1454.494,"body":"But he just, like, jet it out"},{"startTime":1450.866,"endTime":1454.494,"body":"and then, you know, was like, slamming"},{"startTime":1454.494,"endTime":1455.412,"body":"on the brakes."},{"startTime":1455.412,"endTime":1458.457,"body":"And I was like, Don't drive"},{"startTime":1455.412,"endTime":1458.457,"body":"like you're a piece of shit, Dad."},{"startTime":1458.457,"endTime":1460.375,"body":"And I"},{"startTime":1460.459,"endTime":1463.295,"body":"don't talk to my son."},{"startTime":1463.295,"endTime":1465.38,"body":"you're hit me with your car."},{"startTime":1465.38,"endTime":1468.383,"body":"Yeah. Do whatever I want. Yeah, I'm out."},{"startTime":1468.383,"endTime":1469.468,"body":"And then I just fell over."},{"startTime":1469.468,"endTime":1473.68,"body":"my kid was just like,"},{"startTime":1473.722,"endTime":1476.725,"body":"Okay, you what?"},{"startTime":1476.725,"endTime":1478.56,"body":"I'm trying to get into where."},{"startTime":1478.56,"endTime":1480.187,"body":"You're, like,"},{"startTime":1478.56,"endTime":1480.187,"body":"out of the elementary school."},{"startTime":1480.187,"endTime":1481.021,"body":"And my sister graduated"},{"startTime":1481.021,"endTime":1485.066,"body":"the junior high, so I was picked at first,"},{"startTime":1481.021,"endTime":1485.066,"body":"and we wait outside the junior high"},{"startTime":1485.15,"endTime":1488.069,"body":"away from the school,"},{"startTime":1485.15,"endTime":1488.069,"body":"but that it was under the tree."},{"startTime":1488.069,"endTime":1491.072,"body":"We're like the bad kids. no."},{"startTime":1491.114,"endTime":1491.781,"body":"The one day."},{"startTime":1491.781,"endTime":1493.992,"body":"And it was one of those"},{"startTime":1491.781,"endTime":1493.992,"body":"where I'm in the passenger seat"},{"startTime":1493.992,"endTime":1495.827,"body":"of the white wood paneled minivan."},{"startTime":1495.827,"endTime":1500.373,"body":"And my mom, she sees these kids smoking"},{"startTime":1495.827,"endTime":1500.373,"body":"and she's they're they're right there."},{"startTime":1500.457,"endTime":1501.166,"body":"I'm in the middle."},{"startTime":1501.166,"endTime":1504.169,"body":"So my mom rolls the window down"},{"startTime":1501.166,"endTime":1504.169,"body":"and she has you need to quit smoking."},{"startTime":1504.169,"endTime":1509.007,"body":"And the 14 year all goes, you."},{"startTime":1509.09,"endTime":1509.966,"body":"Excuse me."},{"startTime":1509.966,"endTime":1512.594,"body":"that was going to happen."},{"startTime":1512.594,"endTime":1513.553,"body":"And sure enough, he."},{"startTime":1513.553,"endTime":1514.971,"body":"Would never talk to me. Never."},{"startTime":1514.971,"endTime":1516.515,"body":"And now I'm in the middle"},{"startTime":1514.971,"endTime":1516.515,"body":"of all this violence."},{"startTime":1516.515,"endTime":1519.267,"body":"When you were with the kids,"},{"startTime":1516.515,"endTime":1519.267,"body":"are you with your mom?"},{"startTime":1519.267,"endTime":1522.479,"body":"I was in the. I was in elementary school."},{"startTime":1522.521,"endTime":1523.772,"body":"so you're just."},{"startTime":1523.772,"endTime":1524.356,"body":"yeah, yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":1524.356,"endTime":1528.235,"body":"She can't fathom that I would be"},{"startTime":1524.356,"endTime":1528.235,"body":"witnessing a child also smoking a cigaret."},{"startTime":1528.235,"endTime":1529.861,"body":"you do this all the time."},{"startTime":1529.861,"endTime":1531.905,"body":"We were on our way"},{"startTime":1529.861,"endTime":1531.905,"body":"to like gymnastics, right?"},{"startTime":1531.905,"endTime":1535.033,"body":"And some guy was driving crazy,"},{"startTime":1531.905,"endTime":1535.033,"body":"but we caught up to him at a red light,"},{"startTime":1535.033,"endTime":1538.745,"body":"and with all the windows up, she's going,"},{"startTime":1535.033,"endTime":1538.745,"body":"Do you know how fast you're driving?"},{"startTime":1538.745,"endTime":1542.666,"body":"But to him it's up"},{"startTime":1542.749,"endTime":1542.958,"body":"there."},{"startTime":1542.958,"endTime":1546.836,"body":"Everything is there. You just go"},{"startTime":1546.92,"endTime":1548.505,"body":"very slow."},{"startTime":1548.505,"endTime":1552.3,"body":"Get her into the fucking hearse."},{"startTime":1552.342,"endTime":1558.473,"body":"Everyone says hi to my mom like this."},{"startTime":1558.557,"endTime":1559.933,"body":"She's dead."},{"startTime":1559.933,"endTime":1564.479,"body":"You know what I mean?"},{"startTime":1564.563,"endTime":1567.857,"body":"You can flip people keys."},{"startTime":1567.857,"endTime":1570.235,"body":"Yeah. We're doing that shit in Texas."},{"startTime":1570.235,"endTime":1572.028,"body":"Yeah, well, not a good idea."},{"startTime":1572.028,"endTime":1573.947,"body":"Yeah. Guys have had a transition in sex."},{"startTime":1573.947,"endTime":1576.825,"body":"I was raised to be fine,"},{"startTime":1573.947,"endTime":1576.825,"body":"and now it's like."},{"startTime":1576.825,"endTime":1577.784,"body":"It's like the KKK."},{"startTime":1577.784,"endTime":1579.911,"body":"Everybody has to be in the closet about it"},{"startTime":1577.784,"endTime":1579.911,"body":"in Texas."},{"startTime":1579.911,"endTime":1582.914,"body":"It's fun way. I'm afraid of guns."},{"startTime":1583.164,"endTime":1584.332,"body":"Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":1584.332,"endTime":1586.918,"body":"I mean, just in general."},{"startTime":1584.332,"endTime":1586.918,"body":"The only fact I want."},{"startTime":1586.918,"endTime":1591.047,"body":"Let me say I made an illicit drug deal"},{"startTime":1586.918,"endTime":1591.047,"body":"at a country town, and someone opened."},{"startTime":1591.047,"endTime":1593.633,"body":"It was like a cigar box."},{"startTime":1591.047,"endTime":1593.633,"body":"But there was a gun inside. Yeah."},{"startTime":1593.633,"endTime":1595.218,"body":"And everyone was like, pass it around and."},{"startTime":1595.218,"endTime":1598.096,"body":"And all the I like."},{"startTime":1595.218,"endTime":1598.096,"body":"This is how I die. I'm going to die."},{"startTime":1598.096,"endTime":1599.514,"body":"Absolutely. Like."},{"startTime":1599.514,"endTime":1599.931,"body":"What was it?"},{"startTime":1599.931,"endTime":1602.017,"body":"Just pot, you know, I have to say."},{"startTime":1602.017,"endTime":1602.934,"body":"no, you were."},{"startTime":1602.934,"endTime":1603.435,"body":"I was."},{"startTime":1603.435,"endTime":1607.856,"body":"I was along for the ride, but"},{"startTime":1603.435,"endTime":1607.856,"body":"we were buying the biggest bag of cocaine."},{"startTime":1607.939,"endTime":1610.442,"body":"yeah. So conveniently, just."},{"startTime":1610.442,"endTime":1611.86,"body":"That's all right."},{"startTime":1611.86,"endTime":1613.612,"body":"Yeah. He's a passenger."},{"startTime":1613.612,"endTime":1615.28,"body":"Anyone had ever seen. Hi."},{"startTime":1615.28,"endTime":1616.906,"body":"I'm sure. Now."},{"startTime":1616.906,"endTime":1619.701,"body":"I always thought it would be fun."},{"startTime":1616.906,"endTime":1619.701,"body":"It's a pool noodle."},{"startTime":1619.701,"endTime":1621.286,"body":"I no doubt. Is this."},{"startTime":1621.286,"endTime":1624.372,"body":"A party or is this a. Party?"},{"startTime":1624.456,"endTime":1625.04,"body":"I'm in the ocean."},{"startTime":1625.04,"endTime":1626.875,"body":"In Hawaii? Yes. yeah."},{"startTime":1626.875,"endTime":1628.501,"body":"Did. You go scuba diving, too?"},{"startTime":1628.501,"endTime":1631.379,"body":"No, no,"},{"startTime":1628.501,"endTime":1631.379,"body":"we did go on one of those catamarans."},{"startTime":1631.379,"endTime":1634.924,"body":"Which is like an amazing deal."},{"startTime":1634.924,"endTime":1639.763,"body":"Yeah, I mean, it's open"},{"startTime":1634.924,"endTime":1639.763,"body":"bar on, like, a 90 minute cruise. Wow."},{"startTime":1639.846,"endTime":1642.223,"body":"Ocean for 40 bucks."},{"startTime":1642.223,"endTime":1644.017,"body":"All right, you're in Waikiki."},{"startTime":1644.017,"endTime":1645.268,"body":"Everything's okay."},{"startTime":1645.268,"endTime":1646.561,"body":"That kind of thing."},{"startTime":1646.561,"endTime":1648.897,"body":"Yeah. Yeah,"},{"startTime":1646.561,"endTime":1648.897,"body":"You can do daytime more sunset."},{"startTime":1648.897,"endTime":1651.524,"body":"It was really nice,"},{"startTime":1648.897,"endTime":1651.524,"body":"but it is very much like a party."},{"startTime":1651.524,"endTime":1653.526,"body":"I wanted to go."},{"startTime":1651.524,"endTime":1653.526,"body":"I've always wanted to go there."},{"startTime":1653.526,"endTime":1657.947,"body":"I've gone to Kona and Kauai,"},{"startTime":1653.526,"endTime":1657.947,"body":"but Waikiki was like"},{"startTime":1657.947,"endTime":1661.91,"body":"the prize on every right"},{"startTime":1657.947,"endTime":1661.91,"body":"and every game show."},{"startTime":1662.118,"endTime":1662.619,"body":"Beautiful."},{"startTime":1662.619,"endTime":1667.123,"body":"What it was either"},{"startTime":1662.619,"endTime":1667.123,"body":"the Poconos or beautiful Waikiki."},{"startTime":1667.207,"endTime":1667.666,"body":"Right."},{"startTime":1667.666,"endTime":1672.045,"body":"Hotel in the Poconos"},{"startTime":1667.666,"endTime":1672.045,"body":"with, like, the big champagne glass."},{"startTime":1672.128,"endTime":1672.629,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1672.629,"endTime":1673.546,"body":"And then they had that."},{"startTime":1673.546,"endTime":1677.175,"body":"They showed the to the people"},{"startTime":1673.546,"endTime":1677.175,"body":"from the seventies, which is Maya,"},{"startTime":1677.3,"endTime":1679.219,"body":"and they have the heart shape."},{"startTime":1679.219,"endTime":1681.054,"body":"They're sitting in a heart shaped tub."},{"startTime":1681.054,"endTime":1683.181,"body":"Yeah, they still have that."},{"startTime":1681.054,"endTime":1683.181,"body":"You can still stay in them."},{"startTime":1683.181,"endTime":1685.975,"body":"And it's the same hotels from the shit."},{"startTime":1685.975,"endTime":1688.812,"body":"I want to do that."},{"startTime":1688.812,"endTime":1690.647,"body":"That's for. Sure."},{"startTime":1690.647,"endTime":1693.108,"body":"Wait."},{"startTime":1690.647,"endTime":1693.108,"body":"And that's an STD from the seventies."},{"startTime":1693.108,"endTime":1694.609,"body":"I just tasted it on the set."},{"startTime":1694.609,"endTime":1698.071,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1698.113,"endTime":1699.072,"body":"Damn."},{"startTime":1699.072,"endTime":1701.991,"body":"You know, especially being on the road"},{"startTime":1699.072,"endTime":1701.991,"body":"and getting into hotel rooms,"},{"startTime":1701.991,"endTime":1703.493,"body":"it's like, really?"},{"startTime":1703.493,"endTime":1704.035,"body":"okay."},{"startTime":1704.035,"endTime":1705.954,"body":"They just tried to make boutique, right?"},{"startTime":1705.954,"endTime":1708.915,"body":"And clearly it's still the best Western,"},{"startTime":1705.954,"endTime":1708.915,"body":"but the hotel."},{"startTime":1708.915,"endTime":1712.585,"body":"I keep the old shit and put on clean"},{"startTime":1708.915,"endTime":1712.585,"body":"sheets. Yes."},{"startTime":1712.669,"endTime":1714.462,"body":"I do too."},{"startTime":1714.462,"endTime":1718.591,"body":"But they, I love when the tub"},{"startTime":1714.462,"endTime":1718.591,"body":"is in the room because of that."},{"startTime":1718.591,"endTime":1721.511,"body":"Yeah,"},{"startTime":1718.591,"endTime":1721.511,"body":"the tub is in the room. Yeah. That was Up."},{"startTime":1721.511,"endTime":1722.512,"body":"That's so."},{"startTime":1722.512,"endTime":1723.012,"body":"Cool."},{"startTime":1723.012,"endTime":1725.765,"body":"Yeah,"},{"startTime":1723.012,"endTime":1725.765,"body":"I'll still take a bath in that time."},{"startTime":1725.765,"endTime":1726.599,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1726.599,"endTime":1729.602,"body":"yeah,"},{"startTime":1726.599,"endTime":1729.602,"body":"I do sometimes bring my own bleach spray."},{"startTime":1729.644,"endTime":1732.647,"body":"yeah. No, no, no. I feel good idea."},{"startTime":1732.814,"endTime":1733.982,"body":"Yeah, I. Did."},{"startTime":1733.982,"endTime":1738.862,"body":"A man, I think of, like, just being in,"},{"startTime":1733.982,"endTime":1738.862,"body":"like, a condo, which is a comedy condo."},{"startTime":1738.945,"endTime":1741.614,"body":"So for some reason, you think, well,"},{"startTime":1738.945,"endTime":1741.614,"body":"that might be nice."},{"startTime":1741.614,"endTime":1742.782,"body":"I mean, it's like, wait a second."},{"startTime":1742.782,"endTime":1746.619,"body":"Every guy who's ever done"},{"startTime":1742.782,"endTime":1746.619,"body":"stand up has jerked off in this room,"},{"startTime":1746.703,"endTime":1750.749,"body":"and it's like you pull the shower"},{"startTime":1746.703,"endTime":1750.749,"body":"curtain over and it's it's like"},{"startTime":1750.957,"endTime":1755.086,"body":"moving like plastic or I mean,"},{"startTime":1750.957,"endTime":1755.086,"body":"it is plastic, but it's like, you know."},{"startTime":1755.086,"endTime":1757.005,"body":"Yeah, you just junk it."},{"startTime":1757.005,"endTime":1760.383,"body":"The mayonnaise or whatever"},{"startTime":1757.005,"endTime":1760.383,"body":"it is from me, man."},{"startTime":1760.55,"endTime":1763.845,"body":"Yeah, not well. It's just gross."},{"startTime":1763.928,"endTime":1767.056,"body":"To just come in every single thing,"},{"startTime":1763.928,"endTime":1767.056,"body":"my man."},{"startTime":1767.056,"endTime":1771.102,"body":"fuck your own toiletries."},{"startTime":1771.102,"endTime":1772.645,"body":"I never thought of that."},{"startTime":1772.645,"endTime":1773.021,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1773.021,"endTime":1776.232,"body":"Look, I'm glad"},{"startTime":1773.021,"endTime":1776.232,"body":"those condoms have most gone away."},{"startTime":1776.232,"endTime":1779.36,"body":"Yeah, I mean, I've stayed in a couple,"},{"startTime":1776.232,"endTime":1779.36,"body":"and I."},{"startTime":1779.36,"endTime":1782.113,"body":"I felt like they were already at the tail"},{"startTime":1779.36,"endTime":1782.113,"body":"end of that."},{"startTime":1782.113,"endTime":1783.865,"body":"Yeah, which is. Nice."},{"startTime":1783.865,"endTime":1787.66,"body":"I feel like traveling or touring a lot"},{"startTime":1783.865,"endTime":1787.66,"body":"has turned me into, like, a prepper."},{"startTime":1787.911,"endTime":1788.745,"body":"If I knew."},{"startTime":1788.745,"endTime":1790.914,"body":"I'm sorry,"},{"startTime":1788.745,"endTime":1790.914,"body":"but if I knew that somebody was coming"},{"startTime":1790.914,"endTime":1794.292,"body":"in, one of those little things,"},{"startTime":1790.914,"endTime":1794.292,"body":"I would call them trial size."},{"startTime":1794.292,"endTime":1796.878,"body":"The next time I saw them"},{"startTime":1794.292,"endTime":1796.878,"body":"making fun of their dicks."},{"startTime":1796.878,"endTime":1799.798,"body":"Trial size. you. I know what you did."},{"startTime":1799.798,"endTime":1800.34,"body":"Yeah, I don't know."},{"startTime":1800.34,"endTime":1803.843,"body":"Because now you have the ID"},{"startTime":1800.34,"endTime":1803.843,"body":"there on the wall, right?"},{"startTime":1803.843,"endTime":1805.887,"body":"It's a refill. Yeah."},{"startTime":1805.887,"endTime":1808.097,"body":"People would be with that."},{"startTime":1805.887,"endTime":1808.097,"body":"I never thought."},{"startTime":1808.097,"endTime":1809.474,"body":"Well, yeah, you would have to."},{"startTime":1809.474,"endTime":1813.353,"body":"Like what, Like stand up"},{"startTime":1809.474,"endTime":1813.353,"body":"or something to come in there or."},{"startTime":1813.436,"endTime":1815.647,"body":"a little cup and then."},{"startTime":1815.73,"endTime":1816.439,"body":"A devious"},{"startTime":1816.439,"endTime":1819.776,"body":"person or a prankster"},{"startTime":1816.439,"endTime":1819.776,"body":"would go to such length."},{"startTime":1819.859,"endTime":1823.571,"body":"I mean, I, I, I feel like I,"},{"startTime":1823.613,"endTime":1827.116,"body":"I'm always way"},{"startTime":1823.613,"endTime":1827.116,"body":"more freaked out by like one pube."},{"startTime":1827.116,"endTime":1831.037,"body":"one hair of any of them."},{"startTime":1831.12,"endTime":1834.541,"body":"in every hotel room"},{"startTime":1831.12,"endTime":1834.541,"body":"you check into, there's like one hair."},{"startTime":1834.541,"endTime":1835.208,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":1835.208,"endTime":1838.586,"body":"Even if it's like housekeeping lady,"},{"startTime":1835.208,"endTime":1838.586,"body":"housekeeping person."},{"startTime":1838.67,"endTime":1840.797,"body":"Yeah. Or whatever."},{"startTime":1840.797,"endTime":1842.715,"body":"It's just like, I don't know."},{"startTime":1842.715,"endTime":1843.675,"body":"my. Gosh."},{"startTime":1843.675,"endTime":1845.677,"body":"That's the shower. Wall. Yeah."},{"startTime":1845.677,"endTime":1847.554,"body":"I would rather come in sometimes."},{"startTime":1847.554,"endTime":1849.18,"body":"I don't know why. Like, yeah."},{"startTime":1849.18,"endTime":1854.06,"body":"My mom is exactly like you in that she."},{"startTime":1854.269,"endTime":1857.355,"body":"I mean, it's unbelievable because"},{"startTime":1854.269,"endTime":1857.355,"body":"she's got stuff all over the house."},{"startTime":1857.355,"endTime":1858.731,"body":"She doesn't throw anything out."},{"startTime":1858.731,"endTime":1859.983,"body":"But if it's a cat hair"},{"startTime":1859.983,"endTime":1863.361,"body":"or any kind of hair"},{"startTime":1859.983,"endTime":1863.361,"body":"and and she also has like three cats now."},{"startTime":1863.444,"endTime":1866.99,"body":"But I this is how I decided"},{"startTime":1863.444,"endTime":1866.99,"body":"we were big and little E.T."},{"startTime":1866.99,"endTime":1868.575,"body":"the last time I went to North Carolina"},{"startTime":1868.575,"endTime":1872.245,"body":"here, I had my head in the fridge,"},{"startTime":1868.575,"endTime":1872.245,"body":"you know, for comfort or,"},{"startTime":1872.328,"endTime":1874.789,"body":"you know, purpose, whatever. I'm"},{"startTime":1872.328,"endTime":1874.789,"body":"looking for something."},{"startTime":1874.789,"endTime":1877.75,"body":"And my mom's like the five foot"},{"startTime":1874.789,"endTime":1877.75,"body":"two or three."},{"startTime":1877.792,"endTime":1881.713,"body":"She's lint rollers in my back because"},{"startTime":1877.792,"endTime":1881.713,"body":"she doesn't want any hair in the kitchen."},{"startTime":1881.713,"endTime":1884.716,"body":"And I said,"},{"startTime":1881.713,"endTime":1884.716,"body":"Why are you doing this right now?"},{"startTime":1884.757,"endTime":1886.259,"body":"And she goes, Well,"},{"startTime":1884.757,"endTime":1886.259,"body":"because you've got hair on the back,"},{"startTime":1886.259,"endTime":1888.72,"body":"on your back because you say,"},{"startTime":1886.259,"endTime":1888.72,"body":"and by the way, I was naked."},{"startTime":1888.72,"endTime":1890.68,"body":"So it's just my back hair. No, no."},{"startTime":1890.68,"endTime":1892.932,"body":"Because I was wearing"},{"startTime":1890.68,"endTime":1892.932,"body":"as I was wearing my sweats forever."},{"startTime":1892.932,"endTime":1894.642,"body":"And she says,"},{"startTime":1892.932,"endTime":1894.642,"body":"because you sat on the couch."},{"startTime":1894.642,"endTime":1897.77,"body":"So she's lint rolling my rear"},{"startTime":1894.642,"endTime":1897.77,"body":"and my lower back."},{"startTime":1897.77,"endTime":1901.232,"body":"And and I said, you care about"},{"startTime":1897.77,"endTime":1901.232,"body":"I mean, I agree."},{"startTime":1901.232,"endTime":1902.442,"body":"That's disgusting."},{"startTime":1902.442,"endTime":1907.405,"body":"There's there's a but there's there's"},{"startTime":1902.442,"endTime":1907.405,"body":"cat air and everything all over the floor."},{"startTime":1907.488,"endTime":1911.117,"body":"But I mean, just can't be in the kitchen"},{"startTime":1907.488,"endTime":1911.117,"body":"area like a hair that yeah."},{"startTime":1911.2,"endTime":1915.747,"body":"I will not eat food"},{"startTime":1911.2,"endTime":1915.747,"body":"prepared by someone else"},{"startTime":1915.83,"endTime":1918.416,"body":"unless she oversaw it"},{"startTime":1915.83,"endTime":1918.416,"body":"and knows that they like."},{"startTime":1918.416,"endTime":1921.169,"body":"and under her back."},{"startTime":1921.169,"endTime":1924.172,"body":"But she does eat takeout. Yeah."},{"startTime":1924.339,"endTime":1928.843,"body":"So if you know one of my"},{"startTime":1924.339,"endTime":1928.843,"body":"if one of us come over and make something"},{"startTime":1928.843,"endTime":1934.223,"body":"while she's asleep or whatever and then go"},{"startTime":1928.843,"endTime":1934.223,"body":"here, she look she doesn't trust it"},{"startTime":1934.307,"endTime":1934.849,"body":"from random"},{"startTime":1934.849,"endTime":1937.852,"body":"restaurant and she's like,"},{"startTime":1934.849,"endTime":1937.852,"body":"I can put that I had."},{"startTime":1938.061,"endTime":1939.562,"body":"Cause she didn't."},{"startTime":1939.562,"endTime":1943.066,"body":"Of a stranger's finger in your food"},{"startTime":1939.562,"endTime":1943.066,"body":"then, like your daughter's."},{"startTime":1943.066,"endTime":1945.36,"body":"I had a guy I worked with."},{"startTime":1945.36,"endTime":1946.152,"body":"How many daughters?"},{"startTime":1946.152,"endTime":1949.155,"body":"How many kids are there"},{"startTime":1946.152,"endTime":1949.155,"body":"in your family for kids?"},{"startTime":1949.364,"endTime":1951.157,"body":"okay. Okay. Where are you?"},{"startTime":1951.157,"endTime":1953.117,"body":"And I have some biological siblings."},{"startTime":1953.117,"endTime":1954.661,"body":"I don't know."},{"startTime":1954.661,"endTime":1955.495,"body":"I'm the youngest."},{"startTime":1955.495,"endTime":1958.373,"body":"You are?"},{"startTime":1958.373,"endTime":1961.376,"body":"baby."},{"startTime":1961.459,"endTime":1963.086,"body":"For an hour."},{"startTime":1963.086,"endTime":1966.464,"body":"I feel like the youngest one"},{"startTime":1963.086,"endTime":1966.464,"body":"has to be the five in your herd."},{"startTime":1966.547,"endTime":1968.967,"body":"Yeah, I was very, very silent as a child."},{"startTime":1968.967,"endTime":1974.514,"body":"but when I got in a line, it was like"},{"startTime":1968.967,"endTime":1974.514,"body":"it had to be funny."},{"startTime":1974.597,"endTime":1975.556,"body":"that's great."},{"startTime":1975.556,"endTime":1978.351,"body":"You don't get a lot of opportunities"},{"startTime":1975.556,"endTime":1978.351,"body":"and that's better."},{"startTime":1978.351,"endTime":1980.353,"body":"Yeah. Or extremely rude."},{"startTime":1980.353,"endTime":1981.938,"body":"Yeah, yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":1981.938,"endTime":1982.855,"body":"no. yeah."},{"startTime":1982.855,"endTime":1984.065,"body":"For my sisters and stuff."},{"startTime":1984.065,"endTime":1986.818,"body":"But mostly I just hung back and. Watch."},{"startTime":1986.901,"endTime":1988.403,"body":"A face to speak to a college."},{"startTime":1988.403,"endTime":1989.237,"body":"I feel like."},{"startTime":1989.237,"endTime":1992.24,"body":"Wow, stage door at a young age."},{"startTime":1992.281,"endTime":1995.076,"body":"I love that movie."},{"startTime":1992.281,"endTime":1995.076,"body":"Have you seen that movie?"},{"startTime":1995.076,"endTime":1996.16,"body":"It's really old."},{"startTime":1996.16,"endTime":1997.662,"body":"I think. you love it."},{"startTime":1997.662,"endTime":1998.955,"body":"It's so good."},{"startTime":1998.955,"endTime":2001.958,"body":"It's all these women,"},{"startTime":1998.955,"endTime":2001.958,"body":"all these actresses in a rooming house."},{"startTime":2002.208,"endTime":2004.21,"body":"It's Eve, Arden, Lucille Ball."},{"startTime":2004.21,"endTime":2007.296,"body":"Always. And the way they like, insulted."},{"startTime":2007.296,"endTime":2011.843,"body":"they leave in ermine"},{"startTime":2007.296,"endTime":2011.843,"body":"and come back in rags."},{"startTime":2011.926,"endTime":2013.177,"body":"They're real mouthy."},{"startTime":2013.177,"endTime":2017.14,"body":"And I tried like that,"},{"startTime":2013.177,"endTime":2017.14,"body":"but I didn't have the one liner behind it,"},{"startTime":2017.14,"endTime":2021.561,"body":"so I just had the shitty attitude"},{"startTime":2017.14,"endTime":2021.561,"body":"with that empty statement."},{"startTime":2021.644,"endTime":2023.021,"body":"I definitely do that."},{"startTime":2023.021,"endTime":2025.898,"body":"Yeah. me, Darlene."},{"startTime":2025.898,"endTime":2027.025,"body":"that's so cute."},{"startTime":2027.025,"endTime":2030.111,"body":"You're a big Roseanne fan"},{"startTime":2027.025,"endTime":2030.111,"body":"because that show was so bad."},{"startTime":2030.278,"endTime":2033.573,"body":"my God, Yes, I swear."},{"startTime":2033.573,"endTime":2034.824,"body":"Still, I still watch it."},{"startTime":2034.824,"endTime":2038.494,"body":"Seasons three, four"},{"startTime":2034.824,"endTime":2038.494,"body":"or five are like amazing television."},{"startTime":2038.494,"endTime":2041.497,"body":"Am I allowed to brag and say that? I."},{"startTime":2038.494,"endTime":2041.497,"body":"I wrote on that."},{"startTime":2041.497,"endTime":2043.499,"body":"I wrote on Roseanne and 92"},{"startTime":2043.499,"endTime":2048.838,"body":"and I think it was thinking, Well,"},{"startTime":2043.499,"endTime":2048.838,"body":"then I guess I don't need to brag."},{"startTime":2048.921,"endTime":2053.134,"body":"And I why am I trying to why am I trying"},{"startTime":2048.921,"endTime":2053.134,"body":"to impress Amy here for a minute?"},{"startTime":2053.134,"endTime":2054.218,"body":"It's insane."},{"startTime":2054.218,"endTime":2055.011,"body":"Like good work."},{"startTime":2055.011,"endTime":2057.555,"body":"Yeah. So funny. That's the whole thing."},{"startTime":2055.011,"endTime":2057.555,"body":"It's like."},{"startTime":2057.555,"endTime":2058.097,"body":"It really is."},{"startTime":2058.097,"endTime":2061.142,"body":"Like, the jokes are, like,"},{"startTime":2058.097,"endTime":2061.142,"body":"hilarious and timeless and all that."},{"startTime":2061.142,"endTime":2062.56,"body":"Shit, and they're delivery."},{"startTime":2062.56,"endTime":2066.731,"body":"Like when John Goodman and Roseanne"},{"startTime":2062.56,"endTime":2066.731,"body":"are like, laughing and all that."},{"startTime":2066.814,"endTime":2069.776,"body":"I love John Goodman so much."},{"startTime":2069.776,"endTime":2072.153,"body":"Ari seems like the best thing."},{"startTime":2069.776,"endTime":2072.153,"body":"He's an angel."},{"startTime":2072.153,"endTime":2074.238,"body":"I remember. I actually."},{"startTime":2074.238,"endTime":2077.408,"body":"I was working on the same lot, just,"},{"startTime":2074.238,"endTime":2077.408,"body":"you know, like a month ago."},{"startTime":2077.408,"endTime":2079.952,"body":"And I just saw him."},{"startTime":2079.952,"endTime":2084.749,"body":"And just because it was"},{"startTime":2079.952,"endTime":2084.749,"body":"just it was me and another"},{"startTime":2084.832,"endTime":2085.583,"body":"new writer, and we"},{"startTime":2085.583,"endTime":2088.628,"body":"were just walking down the hall"},{"startTime":2085.583,"endTime":2088.628,"body":"and I said, Hi, John."},{"startTime":2088.628,"endTime":2090.129,"body":"And I thought,"},{"startTime":2088.628,"endTime":2090.129,"body":"he's not going to work out."},{"startTime":2090.129,"endTime":2092.256,"body":"He probably just thought,"},{"startTime":2090.129,"endTime":2092.256,"body":"Why are these assholes staring?"},{"startTime":2092.256,"endTime":2093.8,"body":"And I said, Hi, John, it's Laura."},{"startTime":2093.8,"endTime":2095.843,"body":"Guess Laura Kightlinger, How are you?"},{"startTime":2095.843,"endTime":2097.428,"body":"Yeah, I remember. Me."},{"startTime":2097.428,"endTime":2100.348,"body":"Yeah, well, I Yeah, well, I, you know,"},{"startTime":2100.348,"endTime":2104.31,"body":"20 years ago we used to kind of all of us"},{"startTime":2100.348,"endTime":2104.31,"body":"used to hang out a little bit."},{"startTime":2104.435,"endTime":2106.479,"body":"Yeah. After the shows and stuff. He."},{"startTime":2106.479,"endTime":2109.69,"body":"I always said I want to go to like a,"},{"startTime":2106.479,"endTime":2109.69,"body":"like a steak house dinner"},{"startTime":2109.69,"endTime":2112.985,"body":"with, like, red wine and scotch"},{"startTime":2109.69,"endTime":2112.985,"body":"and just like, I wanted to."},{"startTime":2112.985,"endTime":2115.988,"body":"I want to David Letterman"},{"startTime":2112.985,"endTime":2115.988,"body":"and I want to be John."},{"startTime":2116.197,"endTime":2116.697,"body":"I am."},{"startTime":2116.697,"endTime":2120.493,"body":"I want the server because I think"},{"startTime":2116.697,"endTime":2120.493,"body":"they'd be into it to be Amy Sedaris."},{"startTime":2120.576,"endTime":2122.245,"body":"my God. She's amazing. Way."},{"startTime":2122.245,"endTime":2123.246,"body":"But I think she really."},{"startTime":2123.246,"endTime":2124.539,"body":"I love her."},{"startTime":2124.539,"endTime":2126.124,"body":"Yeah. She makes cupcakes and stuff."},{"startTime":2126.124,"endTime":2130.586,"body":"And she she she worked at a restaurant"},{"startTime":2126.124,"endTime":2130.586,"body":"in New York even while she was famous."},{"startTime":2130.67,"endTime":2132.588,"body":"She worked at I'm"},{"startTime":2132.672,"endTime":2133.339,"body":"God now."},{"startTime":2133.339,"endTime":2134.34,"body":"I don't remember the name, but."},{"startTime":2134.34,"endTime":2137.009,"body":"But for a long time. Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":2137.009,"endTime":2140.096,"body":"What was that"},{"startTime":2137.009,"endTime":2140.096,"body":"restaurant in Midtown that like?"},{"startTime":2140.096,"endTime":2141.639,"body":"Yeah, like Letterman."},{"startTime":2140.096,"endTime":2141.639,"body":"A lot of people will go."},{"startTime":2141.639,"endTime":2146.894,"body":"It was like, I want to say the 700 Club,"},{"startTime":2141.639,"endTime":2146.894,"body":"which is, I love that."},{"startTime":2146.894,"endTime":2147.478,"body":"Shit."},{"startTime":2147.478,"endTime":2149.313,"body":"I can't even remember."},{"startTime":2149.313,"endTime":2152.108,"body":"I can't remember. Of 100 or so."},{"startTime":2152.108,"endTime":2156.779,"body":"I was a number in an underground"},{"startTime":2152.108,"endTime":2156.779,"body":"like, fancy steakhouse."},{"startTime":2156.821,"endTime":2159.782,"body":"Yeah, very exclusive. Yeah."},{"startTime":2159.782,"endTime":2160.366,"body":"I do."},{"startTime":2160.366,"endTime":2162.994,"body":"But I can't remember names of anything."},{"startTime":2162.994,"endTime":2165.121,"body":"But it was one of those things."},{"startTime":2165.121,"endTime":2168.374,"body":"I was like,"},{"startTime":2165.121,"endTime":2168.374,"body":"Do I at a very conflicted agency?"},{"startTime":2168.374,"endTime":2170.585,"body":"Do I want darling to be my girlfriend"},{"startTime":2168.374,"endTime":2170.585,"body":"or I do."},{"startTime":2170.585,"endTime":2172.92,"body":"I just want to beat her."},{"startTime":2172.92,"endTime":2176.382,"body":"I felt I. Wanted I mean, I laughed."},{"startTime":2176.465,"endTime":2180.011,"body":"I felt that same way about"},{"startTime":2176.465,"endTime":2180.011,"body":"Kristy McNichol."},{"startTime":2180.094,"endTime":2182.388,"body":"Really?"},{"startTime":2182.471,"endTime":2183.639,"body":"For a split second, I"},{"startTime":2183.639,"endTime":2186.642,"body":"thought you were going to say the bitch"},{"startTime":2183.639,"endTime":2186.642,"body":"you blew up on the Challenger."},{"startTime":2186.726,"endTime":2188.144,"body":"But that's all I was."},{"startTime":2188.144,"endTime":2190.021,"body":"no, no, no."},{"startTime":2190.021,"endTime":2191.939,"body":"Sally Ride, I think, would have been much."},{"startTime":2191.939,"endTime":2194.483,"body":"The same about Darling."},{"startTime":2194.483,"endTime":2196.444,"body":"Yeah. I want her to be my boyfriend, too."},{"startTime":2196.444,"endTime":2198.196,"body":"Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":2198.196,"endTime":2201.908,"body":"Well, she just had this, like, weight"},{"startTime":2198.196,"endTime":2201.908,"body":"to her that I think I had as a kid."},{"startTime":2201.908,"endTime":2203.201,"body":"Just like a darkness."},{"startTime":2203.201,"endTime":2206.162,"body":"Yeah. Been here before? Yeah."},{"startTime":2206.162,"endTime":2207.246,"body":"You sell like."},{"startTime":2207.246,"endTime":2208.206,"body":"So adults."},{"startTime":2208.206,"endTime":2210.791,"body":"Right? Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":2210.791,"endTime":2211.626,"body":"She was so."},{"startTime":2211.626,"endTime":2214.795,"body":"Kind of you guys. Yeah. Like,"},{"startTime":2211.626,"endTime":2214.795,"body":"this is dark."},{"startTime":2214.795,"endTime":2215.796,"body":"What's happening?"},{"startTime":2215.796,"endTime":2222.595,"body":"Yeah, Adding to it."},{"startTime":2222.678,"endTime":2223.304,"body":"this came out."},{"startTime":2223.304,"endTime":2225.765,"body":"Before both of you kids were born."},{"startTime":2225.765,"endTime":2226.933,"body":"But you kids."},{"startTime":2226.933,"endTime":2228.184,"body":"But you have to open a camera."},{"startTime":2228.184,"endTime":2230.436,"body":"First on boxing. Yes."},{"startTime":2230.436,"endTime":2233.439,"body":"Yes. Or happy early birthday."},{"startTime":2233.564,"endTime":2235.983,"body":"No, I wrapped it a while ago"},{"startTime":2233.564,"endTime":2235.983,"body":"because I couldn't figure out."},{"startTime":2235.983,"endTime":2238.194,"body":"I said, you're like,"},{"startTime":2238.277,"endTime":2238.903,"body":"Yeah,"},{"startTime":2238.903,"endTime":2242.657,"body":"you better look at how crazy she looks."},{"startTime":2242.74,"endTime":2245.034,"body":"Oh, she was insane."},{"startTime":2242.74,"endTime":2245.034,"body":"Do you know about this?"},{"startTime":2245.034,"endTime":2248.537,"body":"Oh, which do?"},{"startTime":2248.621,"endTime":2249.163,"body":"And you?"},{"startTime":2249.163,"endTime":2251.54,"body":"I mean, gear,"},{"startTime":2249.163,"endTime":2251.54,"body":"Which camera should it be on this?"},{"startTime":2251.54,"endTime":2252.708,"body":"She showed this with."},{"startTime":2252.708,"endTime":2254.919,"body":"A crossword game."},{"startTime":2254.919,"endTime":2256.587,"body":"Where did you get. Oh, good. Well,"},{"startTime":2254.919,"endTime":2256.587,"body":"I can see."},{"startTime":2256.587,"endTime":2257.713,"body":"Of course."},{"startTime":2257.713,"endTime":2259.006,"body":"Eyebrows shoot."},{"startTime":2259.006,"endTime":2260.675,"body":"Yeah, all of it. Well, that's a wig."},{"startTime":2260.675,"endTime":2262.051,"body":"Good. Let's start with that."},{"startTime":2262.051,"endTime":2264.553,"body":"Her lips are not hers."},{"startTime":2264.553,"endTime":2265.846,"body":"Yes, yes."},{"startTime":2265.846,"endTime":2267.139,"body":"Yes, you can see them."},{"startTime":2267.139,"endTime":2270.685,"body":"But it's called Cross up,"},{"startTime":2267.139,"endTime":2270.685,"body":"so it's like a crossword. But."},{"startTime":2270.768,"endTime":2271.978,"body":"But what?"},{"startTime":2271.978,"endTime":2272.812,"body":"But what?"},{"startTime":2272.812,"endTime":2276.232,"body":"Mm. Maybe it's"},{"startTime":2272.812,"endTime":2276.232,"body":"kind of like bananagrams with cards"},{"startTime":2276.232,"endTime":2278.693,"body":"where you're trying to make words"},{"startTime":2276.232,"endTime":2278.693,"body":"that crossover."},{"startTime":2278.693,"endTime":2281.696,"body":"Oh, that could be"},{"startTime":2278.693,"endTime":2281.696,"body":"because it was from night."},{"startTime":2281.696,"endTime":2285.032,"body":"But it's from 1974, of course."},{"startTime":2285.032,"endTime":2287.66,"body":"But 1974. Isn't that crazy?"},{"startTime":2285.032,"endTime":2287.66,"body":"Look at this, Amy."},{"startTime":2287.66,"endTime":2291.289,"body":"It says Cross up."},{"startTime":2287.66,"endTime":2291.289,"body":"So you put your name on there."},{"startTime":2291.372,"endTime":2292.999,"body":"How do you play?"},{"startTime":2292.999,"endTime":2293.958,"body":"Oh, look."},{"startTime":2293.958,"endTime":2296.877,"body":"Some. Oh, yeah,"},{"startTime":2293.958,"endTime":2296.877,"body":"Somebody already started it."},{"startTime":2296.877,"endTime":2297.628,"body":"Yeah. Okay."},{"startTime":2297.628,"endTime":2300.798,"body":"So somebody already had fun with it."},{"startTime":2300.881,"endTime":2304.385,"body":"You know, there's the there the exit."},{"startTime":2304.468,"endTime":2306.929,"body":"Look, look."},{"startTime":2304.468,"endTime":2306.929,"body":"There are the directions on the back."},{"startTime":2306.929,"endTime":2310.599,"body":"Oh, I think you're right. Uh."},{"startTime":2310.683,"endTime":2312.81,"body":"Sylvia. Oh, I like."},{"startTime":2312.81,"endTime":2314.52,"body":"1974. Mm."},{"startTime":2314.52,"endTime":2317.064,"body":"I love Sylvia as a name to have."},{"startTime":2317.064,"endTime":2317.773,"body":"Played a lot."},{"startTime":2317.773,"endTime":2320.609,"body":"And then someone just did, like,"},{"startTime":2317.773,"endTime":2320.609,"body":"one little more, so. Yeah."},{"startTime":2320.609,"endTime":2321.485,"body":"Thank you. Long time."},{"startTime":2321.485,"endTime":2326.157,"body":"And this is what happens right"},{"startTime":2321.485,"endTime":2326.157,"body":"before you kill yourself in a hotel room."},{"startTime":2326.157,"endTime":2328.034,"body":"You play a cross of."},{"startTime":2328.034,"endTime":2328.784,"body":"Thank you, Lord."},{"startTime":2328.784,"endTime":2330.578,"body":"Oh, you're so welcome."},{"startTime":2328.784,"endTime":2330.578,"body":"But isn't that funny?"},{"startTime":2330.578,"endTime":2332.246,"body":"I don't think those were around that much."},{"startTime":2332.246,"endTime":2334.54,"body":"I mean, they sure as hell aren't now, but."},{"startTime":2334.54,"endTime":2335.458,"body":"Hand is that."},{"startTime":2335.458,"endTime":2338.044,"body":"I think you let. Anyone under nine"},{"startTime":2335.458,"endTime":2338.044,"body":"try and play that."},{"startTime":2338.044,"endTime":2339.795,"body":"That is. Dangerous. Yeah."},{"startTime":2339.795,"endTime":2341.047,"body":"And you have to frame that."},{"startTime":2341.047,"endTime":2342.715,"body":"You could frame that in a"},{"startTime":2341.047,"endTime":2342.715,"body":"what do you call it?"},{"startTime":2342.715,"endTime":2345.593,"body":"Um, no,"},{"startTime":2342.715,"endTime":2345.593,"body":"but I mean, what are the box frames?"},{"startTime":2345.593,"endTime":2346.469,"body":"A diorama?"},{"startTime":2346.469,"endTime":2348.262,"body":"Yeah, maybe. Or not."},{"startTime":2348.262,"endTime":2349.013,"body":"I don't know."},{"startTime":2349.013,"endTime":2351.265,"body":"Diorama with the actual box."},{"startTime":2351.265,"endTime":2354.268,"body":"Make a little one. Yeah. No one. Yeah."},{"startTime":2354.435,"endTime":2357.146,"body":"Yeah, of course, Judy."},{"startTime":2357.146,"endTime":2358.773,"body":"Well, who knew that was going to come up?"},{"startTime":2358.773,"endTime":2361.4,"body":"All right, all right. You're a gift giver."},{"startTime":2361.4,"endTime":2362.109,"body":"I like to."},{"startTime":2362.109,"endTime":2364.32,"body":"I don't know why"},{"startTime":2362.109,"endTime":2364.32,"body":"I get such a kick out of it."},{"startTime":2364.32,"endTime":2366.238,"body":"You do. Though, Just because I."},{"startTime":2366.238,"endTime":2367.948,"body":"Play her for years and you do that, right?"},{"startTime":2367.948,"endTime":2370.117,"body":"What I got from Kate Loving gallery."},{"startTime":2370.117,"endTime":2373.913,"body":"Oh, I'm glad I'm glad it lingers."},{"startTime":2373.913,"endTime":2374.83,"body":"Blu ray."},{"startTime":2374.83,"endTime":2378.709,"body":"Yes. Hey, Seen downstairs in the back."},{"startTime":2378.751,"endTime":2379.71,"body":"Have you been here before?"},{"startTime":2379.71,"endTime":2380.461,"body":"No. No."},{"startTime":2380.461,"endTime":2382.588,"body":"Well, you have to come here more often,"},{"startTime":2380.461,"endTime":2382.588,"body":"and we have to meet."},{"startTime":2382.588,"endTime":2386.008,"body":"And now that we've talked about,"},{"startTime":2382.588,"endTime":2386.008,"body":"I have to meet your your boyfriend's ass."},{"startTime":2386.008,"endTime":2387.51,"body":"I have to see if it's."},{"startTime":2387.51,"endTime":2388.469,"body":"It was juicy as well."},{"startTime":2388.469,"endTime":2390.304,"body":"She's delicious. Delicious."},{"startTime":2390.304,"endTime":2393.265,"body":"Which is, like,"},{"startTime":2390.304,"endTime":2393.265,"body":"the most perfect ass I've ever seen."},{"startTime":2393.265,"endTime":2394.141,"body":"Yeah, but."},{"startTime":2394.141,"endTime":2395.309,"body":"He has no flaws on it."},{"startTime":2395.309,"endTime":2395.768,"body":"Mm hmm."},{"startTime":2395.768,"endTime":2397.77,"body":"Like, I, you know, my ass. Whatever."},{"startTime":2397.77,"endTime":2401.399,"body":"I Look, there's shit going. On. Yeah,"},{"startTime":2397.77,"endTime":2401.399,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2401.482,"endTime":2405.277,"body":"Like, just marks and,"},{"startTime":2401.482,"endTime":2405.277,"body":"you know, like, pimples or whatever."},{"startTime":2405.361,"endTime":2407.947,"body":"I've never gotten acne on my face,"},{"startTime":2405.361,"endTime":2407.947,"body":"knock on wood."},{"startTime":2407.947,"endTime":2411.45,"body":"I mean, just because high school"},{"startTime":2407.947,"endTime":2411.45,"body":"is easier, I think, than you did."},{"startTime":2411.534,"endTime":2413.953,"body":"Yeah, I have it right now."},{"startTime":2413.953,"endTime":2415.079,"body":"Oh. Yeah."},{"startTime":2415.079,"endTime":2416.664,"body":"Just like pimples on my back."},{"startTime":2416.664,"endTime":2417.206,"body":"That's not fair."},{"startTime":2417.206,"endTime":2418.165,"body":"It just doesn't."},{"startTime":2418.165,"endTime":2420.709,"body":"His looks like someone just painted it."},{"startTime":2420.709,"endTime":2423.462,"body":"I used to do. I used to do Uh huh."},{"startTime":2423.462,"endTime":2426.674,"body":"You said you're not starstruck"},{"startTime":2423.462,"endTime":2426.674,"body":"at all, like, especially in comedy."},{"startTime":2426.674,"endTime":2427.174,"body":"Were you?"},{"startTime":2427.174,"endTime":2428.384,"body":"Are there people that you grew up"},{"startTime":2428.384,"endTime":2431.345,"body":"watching that you're like,"},{"startTime":2428.384,"endTime":2431.345,"body":"I can't believe I get to work with them."},{"startTime":2431.345,"endTime":2434.181,"body":"Yes. Well, that when I"},{"startTime":2434.265,"endTime":2436.892,"body":"six years"},{"startTime":2434.265,"endTime":2436.892,"body":"ago just didn't have to qualify it."},{"startTime":2436.892,"endTime":2438.102,"body":"But people know what happened."},{"startTime":2438.102,"endTime":2439.812,"body":"When I opened for Roseanne."},{"startTime":2438.102,"endTime":2439.812,"body":"That was great."},{"startTime":2439.812,"endTime":2442.022,"body":"I yeah, you get to do."},{"startTime":2442.022,"endTime":2446.694,"body":"That was like"},{"startTime":2442.022,"endTime":2446.694,"body":"2015 was very on the cusp of whatever saw."},{"startTime":2446.777,"endTime":2448.154,"body":"Her. Yeah."},{"startTime":2448.154,"endTime":2450.156,"body":"Like dyed in the wool Roseanne fan."},{"startTime":2450.156,"endTime":2451.532,"body":"Yeah she's great."},{"startTime":2451.532,"endTime":2454.118,"body":"It's happening now."},{"startTime":2451.532,"endTime":2454.118,"body":"But if I had ever. Said."},{"startTime":2454.118,"endTime":2456.412,"body":"I would brag about that. Well,"},{"startTime":2454.118,"endTime":2456.412,"body":"you know, to."},{"startTime":2456.412,"endTime":2457.413,"body":"Yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":2457.413,"endTime":2461.041,"body":"So, um, she was a judge on last comic."},{"startTime":2461.125,"endTime":2464.503,"body":"Oh, that's a what is that like, I,"},{"startTime":2464.587,"endTime":2468.591,"body":"I couldn't even watch that show"},{"startTime":2464.587,"endTime":2468.591,"body":"because I thought, this is so frightening"},{"startTime":2468.591,"endTime":2471.26,"body":"because you don't know"},{"startTime":2468.591,"endTime":2471.26,"body":"what you're going to get with the hosts."},{"startTime":2471.26,"endTime":2473.345,"body":"And it's all that, just the pressure"},{"startTime":2473.345,"endTime":2476.307,"body":"in general of the audience,"},{"startTime":2473.345,"endTime":2476.307,"body":"and you're being judged."},{"startTime":2476.307,"endTime":2477.308,"body":"How was it?"},{"startTime":2477.308,"endTime":2479.518,"body":"I had a great time. Oh, good."},{"startTime":2479.518,"endTime":2483.355,"body":"Very new comic, like,"},{"startTime":2479.518,"endTime":2483.355,"body":"just like almost three years and."},{"startTime":2483.397,"endTime":2484.857,"body":"Oh, yeah, that's so new. Yeah."},{"startTime":2484.857,"endTime":2490.613,"body":"We got very lucky because that season"},{"startTime":2484.857,"endTime":2490.613,"body":"it was the final season, so it yeah,"},{"startTime":2490.696,"endTime":2494.283,"body":"it was produced by Wanda and Page"},{"startTime":2494.366,"endTime":2496.035,"body":"Jeselnik was the host."},{"startTime":2496.035,"endTime":2497.286,"body":"Oh, I like him."},{"startTime":2497.286,"endTime":2500.289,"body":"Yeah. Roseanne, Norm and Kenan."},{"startTime":2500.331,"endTime":2501.749,"body":"Oh okay."},{"startTime":2501.749,"endTime":2504.96,"body":"And it was, you know,"},{"startTime":2501.749,"endTime":2504.96,"body":"we didn't live together."},{"startTime":2504.96,"endTime":2506.253,"body":"Not like those early seasons."},{"startTime":2506.253,"endTime":2507.671,"body":"I thought it was really fun."},{"startTime":2507.671,"endTime":2510.466,"body":"Oh, living in Portland at the time."},{"startTime":2510.466,"endTime":2511.55,"body":"So it's like, I don't know,"},{"startTime":2511.55,"endTime":2515.554,"body":"we just stay at the Hilton and,"},{"startTime":2511.55,"endTime":2515.554,"body":"like, swam and worked like an hour or so."},{"startTime":2515.554,"endTime":2517.64,"body":"You they keep you there a week for it."},{"startTime":2517.64,"endTime":2519.517,"body":"Or if you would."},{"startTime":2519.517,"endTime":2520.351,"body":"Oh, I see."},{"startTime":2520.351,"endTime":2522.228,"body":"They're like about a week. Mm."},{"startTime":2522.228,"endTime":2525.064,"body":"I got to like the semifinals. Oh great."},{"startTime":2525.064,"endTime":2527.525,"body":"It's like a total of a week"},{"startTime":2525.064,"endTime":2527.525,"body":"and a half, even for the winter."},{"startTime":2527.525,"endTime":2529.151,"body":"Okay, very brief."},{"startTime":2529.151,"endTime":2529.944,"body":"That's very. Cool."},{"startTime":2529.944,"endTime":2534.114,"body":"Just hanging out and, like, talking"},{"startTime":2529.944,"endTime":2534.114,"body":"to your friends, which they're filming."},{"startTime":2534.281,"endTime":2537.618,"body":"Oh, you're just like, Get out of here."},{"startTime":2537.701,"endTime":2538.369,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2538.369,"endTime":2544.333,"body":"Some people are really putting on in the"},{"startTime":2538.369,"endTime":2544.333,"body":"green room, of course, for air time. 035."},{"startTime":2544.542,"endTime":2545.584,"body":"Oh, okay."},{"startTime":2545.584,"endTime":2549.63,"body":"And I like New Norm already, and I knew"},{"startTime":2549.63,"endTime":2552.883,"body":"Paige and Wanda, so it was just like,"},{"startTime":2549.63,"endTime":2552.883,"body":"I don't know, it was comfortable."},{"startTime":2552.967,"endTime":2555.469,"body":"Mm hmm. My friends were there."},{"startTime":2552.967,"endTime":2555.469,"body":"It was great."},{"startTime":2555.469,"endTime":2556.971,"body":"So where did it shoot?"},{"startTime":2556.971,"endTime":2562.142,"body":"Oh, from like, house to feature and then,"},{"startTime":2556.971,"endTime":2562.142,"body":"like, featured a headline someplace."},{"startTime":2562.142,"endTime":2563.143,"body":"Oh, great."},{"startTime":2563.143,"endTime":2563.769,"body":"I wanted."},{"startTime":2563.769,"endTime":2566.23,"body":"I was just like,"},{"startTime":2563.769,"endTime":2566.23,"body":"people to come see me. Yeah."},{"startTime":2566.23,"endTime":2568.232,"body":"Get to that next step as a new."},{"startTime":2568.232,"endTime":2571.235,"body":"And that was shot out here. Mm. Oh, okay."},{"startTime":2571.235,"endTime":2573.112,"body":"Yeah, it was at Universal. Oh, gosh. Okay."},{"startTime":2573.112,"endTime":2575.406,"body":"So that maybe it was in your first thing."},{"startTime":2573.112,"endTime":2575.406,"body":"Okay."},{"startTime":2575.406,"endTime":2578.409,"body":"The very first season"},{"startTime":2575.406,"endTime":2578.409,"body":"when like Jane Moore was the host."},{"startTime":2578.45,"endTime":2579.91,"body":"The first first season."},{"startTime":2579.91,"endTime":2582.079,"body":"But even that show was how I learned about"},{"startTime":2582.079,"endTime":2585.874,"body":"like Kathleen Madigan and like,"},{"startTime":2582.079,"endTime":2585.874,"body":"it was still a great vehicle for people."},{"startTime":2585.958,"endTime":2587.209,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2587.293,"endTime":2591.88,"body":"I think"},{"startTime":2587.293,"endTime":2591.88,"body":"what, what what was stupid about it?"},{"startTime":2591.964,"endTime":2594.091,"body":"Not on NBC's side."},{"startTime":2594.091,"endTime":2597.094,"body":"And I think maybe some of the frustration"},{"startTime":2594.091,"endTime":2597.094,"body":"that one page had is that"},{"startTime":2597.094,"endTime":2601.098,"body":"they didn't use it"},{"startTime":2597.094,"endTime":2601.098,"body":"as like a form for talent"},{"startTime":2601.098,"endTime":2605.144,"body":"or writers or people to pitch shows"},{"startTime":2601.098,"endTime":2605.144,"body":"which like why wouldn't you."},{"startTime":2605.227,"endTime":2605.894,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2605.894,"endTime":2609.815,"body":"Take your like top ten"},{"startTime":2605.894,"endTime":2609.815,"body":"or anyone that got a lot of airtime"},{"startTime":2609.815,"endTime":2613.152,"body":"or big response and go like,"},{"startTime":2609.815,"endTime":2613.152,"body":"what do you have to pitch?"},{"startTime":2613.193,"endTime":2616.572,"body":"Yeah. Oh, very stupid. Yeah."},{"startTime":2616.572,"endTime":2618.782,"body":"And a lot. Of those people"},{"startTime":2616.572,"endTime":2618.782,"body":"still went on to make."},{"startTime":2618.782,"endTime":2620.409,"body":"So. Yeah, just like,"},{"startTime":2620.409,"endTime":2624.58,"body":"I don't know, they really just treated it"},{"startTime":2620.409,"endTime":2624.58,"body":"as like a basement baby show."},{"startTime":2624.622,"endTime":2626.832,"body":"It was probably cheap to produce. Yeah."},{"startTime":2626.832,"endTime":2628.25,"body":"And I don't."},{"startTime":2628.25,"endTime":2631.045,"body":"I just have so much fun. I'm"},{"startTime":2628.25,"endTime":2631.045,"body":"so impressed with Kathleen Madigan."},{"startTime":2631.045,"endTime":2634.089,"body":"I think she's the"},{"startTime":2631.045,"endTime":2634.089,"body":"the original road warrior."},{"startTime":2634.089,"endTime":2638.886,"body":"She's I want to even like,"},{"startTime":2634.089,"endTime":2638.886,"body":"I wanted to ask her to do our show, too,"},{"startTime":2638.886,"endTime":2643.307,"body":"but I feel like she's probably in,"},{"startTime":2638.886,"endTime":2643.307,"body":"you know, Alaska or someplace right now."},{"startTime":2643.39,"endTime":2644.475,"body":"Yeah, she's. Great."},{"startTime":2644.475,"endTime":2650.356,"body":"I love her podcast and in Covered"},{"startTime":2644.475,"endTime":2650.356,"body":"Your Orchard where she had the house."},{"startTime":2650.397,"endTime":2653.359,"body":"Oh, yeah. And it's like, Dolly,"},{"startTime":2653.442,"endTime":2655.986,"body":"whoever's on it is always like weird,"},{"startTime":2653.442,"endTime":2655.986,"body":"amazing women."},{"startTime":2655.986,"endTime":2657.279,"body":"I remember I just saw."},{"startTime":2657.279,"endTime":2659.156,"body":"Oh, Genius Usher kids book."},{"startTime":2659.156,"endTime":2661.867,"body":"Oh. Yeah."},{"startTime":2661.867,"endTime":2663.202,"body":"He was in Canyon life."},{"startTime":2663.202,"endTime":2664.995,"body":"No, I wish he would want to."},{"startTime":2664.995,"endTime":2667.665,"body":"I Yes, but I. don't know."},{"startTime":2667.665,"endTime":2671.335,"body":"I feel like if I go to any kind of a show,"},{"startTime":2667.665,"endTime":2671.335,"body":"it's usually something"},{"startTime":2671.418,"endTime":2674.588,"body":"like there's nineties punk or something"},{"startTime":2671.418,"endTime":2674.588,"body":"like I don't usually go into anything"},{"startTime":2674.588,"endTime":2677.549,"body":"country that much."},{"startTime":2674.588,"endTime":2677.549,"body":"Well it's different for certain people."},{"startTime":2677.549,"endTime":2679.218,"body":"You just got to see like."},{"startTime":2679.218,"endTime":2681.637,"body":"I would see Dwight"},{"startTime":2679.218,"endTime":2681.637,"body":"Yoakam though, in a second."},{"startTime":2681.637,"endTime":2682.93,"body":"Yeah. So I can't."},{"startTime":2682.93,"endTime":2685.474,"body":"So so that's country and I love him so I."},{"startTime":2685.474,"endTime":2686.1,"body":"Oh yeah."},{"startTime":2686.1,"endTime":2688.644,"body":"Try to land Yeah"},{"startTime":2688.644,"endTime":2689.728,"body":"yeah."},{"startTime":2689.728,"endTime":2691.48,"body":"My friend Maggie"},{"startTime":2689.728,"endTime":2691.48,"body":"and I, they wouldn't give us a set."},{"startTime":2691.48,"endTime":2693.607,"body":"Elizabeth. They give us her Kleenex."},{"startTime":2693.607,"endTime":2694.274,"body":"So yeah, some."},{"startTime":2694.274,"endTime":2697.277,"body":"Of her art friends in my house"},{"startTime":2694.274,"endTime":2697.277,"body":"from like, that show."},{"startTime":2697.486,"endTime":2700.239,"body":"Loretta Yeah. Oh,"},{"startTime":2700.322,"endTime":2701.448,"body":"they're not good."},{"startTime":2701.448,"endTime":2702.157,"body":"Uh huh."},{"startTime":2702.157,"endTime":2703.701,"body":"That makes it so much better."},{"startTime":2703.701,"endTime":2705.703,"body":"Yeah. She did all these flower paintings."},{"startTime":2705.703,"endTime":2706.662,"body":"Oh, wow."},{"startTime":2706.662,"endTime":2710.04,"body":"Has a bunch of prints"},{"startTime":2706.662,"endTime":2710.04,"body":"you can buy and they're like, Is hatch."},{"startTime":2710.04,"endTime":2714.378,"body":"Her husband had show print is like"},{"startTime":2710.04,"endTime":2714.378,"body":"the screen printing spot in Nashville."},{"startTime":2714.378,"endTime":2715.129,"body":"That's all I."},{"startTime":2715.129,"endTime":2717.673,"body":"Know. Do the original, like,"},{"startTime":2715.129,"endTime":2717.673,"body":"country posters."},{"startTime":2717.673,"endTime":2722.177,"body":"Are they still print"},{"startTime":2717.673,"endTime":2722.177,"body":"And you can still you go buy"},{"startTime":2722.261,"endTime":2723.22,"body":"art from people there."},{"startTime":2723.22,"endTime":2724.513,"body":"Yeah well, I forgot to ask."},{"startTime":2724.513,"endTime":2726.974,"body":"How do you like that?"},{"startTime":2724.513,"endTime":2726.974,"body":"I thought that was her husband, Hatch."},{"startTime":2726.974,"endTime":2728.892,"body":"She looks like someone who married my mom."},{"startTime":2728.892,"endTime":2731.478,"body":"Dated someone named Hatch. Oh, wow."},{"startTime":2731.478,"endTime":2733.605,"body":"Really? Wow. I knew man And Hutch."},{"startTime":2733.605,"endTime":2735.607,"body":"Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":2735.607,"endTime":2738.193,"body":"I like that lead singer of the Thermals."},{"startTime":2738.193,"endTime":2739.236,"body":"I don't know who they are."},{"startTime":2739.236,"endTime":2741.155,"body":"Oh, you like. Like 90."},{"startTime":2741.155,"endTime":2742.99,"body":"So, yeah, the Thermals."},{"startTime":2742.99,"endTime":2743.449,"body":"I should."},{"startTime":2743.449,"endTime":2744.825,"body":"I'm going to be embarrassed,"},{"startTime":2744.825,"endTime":2749.58,"body":"but I feel like I'm kind of morphing"},{"startTime":2744.825,"endTime":2749.58,"body":"into to Glenn Danzig."},{"startTime":2749.663,"endTime":2751.165,"body":"Mm. Uh,"},{"startTime":2751.248,"endTime":2752.666,"body":"he lives around here, right?"},{"startTime":2752.666,"endTime":2757.379,"body":"We were tied. The."},{"startTime":2757.463,"endTime":2762.634,"body":"I, i, I am a starship person"},{"startTime":2757.463,"endTime":2762.634,"body":"just because, like, I think it's nerdy,"},{"startTime":2762.634,"endTime":2767.806,"body":"but I would love to meet, like,"},{"startTime":2762.634,"endTime":2767.806,"body":"Pat Smear like people like that. Yes."},{"startTime":2767.89,"endTime":2772.227,"body":"Like there are people, I will say,"},{"startTime":2767.89,"endTime":2772.227,"body":"and another person who's just like"},{"startTime":2772.311,"endTime":2773.395,"body":"the storm is shit now."},{"startTime":2773.395,"endTime":2778.025,"body":"But I was at the Troubadour"},{"startTime":2773.395,"endTime":2778.025,"body":"saying Orville or my cat."},{"startTime":2778.108,"endTime":2779.359,"body":"And you invited me to that."},{"startTime":2779.359,"endTime":2782.112,"body":"Or Morrissey walk. Ooh."},{"startTime":2782.112,"endTime":2783.53,"body":"You know, I've always been a huge fan."},{"startTime":2783.53,"endTime":2786.074,"body":"Sure,"},{"startTime":2783.53,"endTime":2786.074,"body":"some people do have, like, a present."},{"startTime":2786.074,"endTime":2788.911,"body":"Yeah, you're like,"},{"startTime":2786.074,"endTime":2788.911,"body":"Morrissey has just walked in."},{"startTime":2788.911,"endTime":2790.537,"body":"Yeah. Changes. Sort of."},{"startTime":2790.537,"endTime":2794.541,"body":"The energy of the Wow"},{"startTime":2790.537,"endTime":2794.541,"body":"just is such a big presence."},{"startTime":2794.541,"endTime":2796.919,"body":"And in that way, I do will,"},{"startTime":2794.541,"endTime":2796.919,"body":"I will get starstruck."},{"startTime":2796.919,"endTime":2797.586,"body":"Mm hmm."},{"startTime":2797.586,"endTime":2800.589,"body":"Like, I'm going to go up to"},{"startTime":2797.586,"endTime":2800.589,"body":"and be like, Hey, Morrissey."},{"startTime":2800.631,"endTime":2802.132,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2802.216,"endTime":2803.509,"body":"But ask."},{"startTime":2803.509,"endTime":2804.76,"body":"Hey, why is he an asshole?"},{"startTime":2804.76,"endTime":2805.928,"body":"I like him too."},{"startTime":2805.928,"endTime":2806.595,"body":"As a story."},{"startTime":2806.595,"endTime":2808.472,"body":"Because he's B he was me. Oh."},{"startTime":2808.472,"endTime":2810.057,"body":"Saying really good songs."},{"startTime":2810.057,"endTime":2812.476,"body":"And he goes, Who the are you?"},{"startTime":2812.476,"endTime":2815.479,"body":"Oh, he's always been a personal asshole,"},{"startTime":2815.479,"endTime":2820.067,"body":"but now he's gotten"},{"startTime":2815.479,"endTime":2820.067,"body":"very like conservative race."},{"startTime":2820.15,"endTime":2823.529,"body":"Oh, shit."},{"startTime":2823.612,"endTime":2825.072,"body":"Some people are just really bad."},{"startTime":2825.072,"endTime":2826.281,"body":"I like."},{"startTime":2826.281,"endTime":2829.326,"body":"Yeah, I like his lyrics so much though."},{"startTime":2829.368,"endTime":2831.161,"body":"Oh yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":2831.161,"endTime":2834.581,"body":"Write"},{"startTime":2831.161,"endTime":2834.581,"body":"my name on your hand with a fountain pen."},{"startTime":2834.748,"endTime":2837.209,"body":"That means you really love me."},{"startTime":2837.209,"endTime":2839.419,"body":"You remember that."},{"startTime":2839.419,"endTime":2840.379,"body":"One for me?"},{"startTime":2840.379,"endTime":2843.298,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2843.298,"endTime":2845.175,"body":"I really like."},{"startTime":2845.175,"endTime":2846.51,"body":"Yeah. Oh, my God."},{"startTime":2846.51,"endTime":2851.849,"body":"I went and saw Morrissey with a die"},{"startTime":2846.51,"endTime":2851.849,"body":"hard fan, and that guy was weeping."},{"startTime":2851.932,"endTime":2853.892,"body":"Wow. Yeah."},{"startTime":2853.892,"endTime":2858.647,"body":"Like deejay from El Paso, Uh, to the best"},{"startTime":2853.892,"endTime":2858.647,"body":"thing was, it was in Austin, Texas."},{"startTime":2858.647,"endTime":2861.733,"body":"But he has is like, you know,"},{"startTime":2858.647,"endTime":2861.733,"body":"that, like, Latino Goth kind of thing."},{"startTime":2861.733,"endTime":2862.025,"body":"That's."},{"startTime":2862.025,"endTime":2864.945,"body":"Sure, that's a huge bulk of the audience"},{"startTime":2862.025,"endTime":2864.945,"body":"that night."},{"startTime":2864.945,"endTime":2865.988,"body":"Uh huh."},{"startTime":2865.988,"endTime":2870.117,"body":"And for the Smiths, it's always been like,"},{"startTime":2865.988,"endTime":2870.117,"body":"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":2870.2,"endTime":2870.909,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2870.909,"endTime":2873.287,"body":"Same department, Depeche Mode,"},{"startTime":2870.909,"endTime":2873.287,"body":"The Cure, same thing."},{"startTime":2873.287,"endTime":2876.164,"body":"But it was just really funny"},{"startTime":2873.287,"endTime":2876.164,"body":"because a lot of kids came up from"},{"startTime":2876.164,"endTime":2879.167,"body":"San Antonio because it was the only show"},{"startTime":2876.164,"endTime":2879.167,"body":"like anywhere in the city."},{"startTime":2879.209,"endTime":2883.422,"body":"So we had this dramatic moment"},{"startTime":2879.209,"endTime":2883.422,"body":"where he shows like, because he's vegan."},{"startTime":2883.672,"endTime":2884.715,"body":"Uh huh. Oh, yeah."},{"startTime":2884.715,"endTime":2886.258,"body":"Ominous murder. Yeah."},{"startTime":2886.258,"endTime":2889.469,"body":"Factory footage, Right? Right. Yeah."},{"startTime":2889.553,"endTime":2891.263,"body":"I'm glad about that, though."},{"startTime":2891.263,"endTime":2892.89,"body":"I can't stand it."},{"startTime":2892.89,"endTime":2896.059,"body":"I hate that people still think it's"},{"startTime":2892.89,"endTime":2896.059,"body":"okay to eat pigs."},{"startTime":2896.059,"endTime":2897.436,"body":"And I mean, I."},{"startTime":2897.436,"endTime":2898.478,"body":"If you're driving."},{"startTime":2898.478,"endTime":2900.147,"body":"Yeah, Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":2900.147,"endTime":2901.523,"body":"You don't want to see it."},{"startTime":2901.523,"endTime":2904.026,"body":"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":2904.026,"endTime":2905.569,"body":"Pig on the way to the weather."},{"startTime":2905.569,"endTime":2909.072,"body":"You know, Abby and here's."},{"startTime":2909.239,"endTime":2910.949,"body":"But I have to say, just."},{"startTime":2910.949,"endTime":2912.826,"body":"I have to plug this for 2 seconds."},{"startTime":2912.826,"endTime":2917.331,"body":"Morning farms"},{"startTime":2912.826,"endTime":2917.331,"body":"or is it Good morning Farm's bacon hour."},{"startTime":2917.331,"endTime":2917.873,"body":"It tastes."},{"startTime":2917.873,"endTime":2918.749,"body":"It's amazing."},{"startTime":2918.749,"endTime":2920.751,"body":"Oh, yes. Jesus."},{"startTime":2920.751,"endTime":2924.087,"body":"Can I get anything right? Morning Star."},{"startTime":2924.129,"endTime":2927.674,"body":"I be such a bad pitch person"},{"startTime":2924.129,"endTime":2927.674,"body":"because I can't remember the name of"},{"startTime":2927.674,"endTime":2929.843,"body":"what I'm pitching."},{"startTime":2929.927,"endTime":2931.303,"body":"But it is really good, isn't it?"},{"startTime":2931.303,"endTime":2933.388,"body":"It tastes even better that I mean, than."},{"startTime":2933.388,"endTime":2935.891,"body":"Than slaughtered animals"},{"startTime":2933.388,"endTime":2935.891,"body":"that know they're going to die."},{"startTime":2935.891,"endTime":2939.227,"body":"It tastes better than slaughtered animals"},{"startTime":2935.891,"endTime":2939.227,"body":"that know they're going to die"},{"startTime":2939.227,"endTime":2940.437,"body":"and are squealing."},{"startTime":2940.437,"endTime":2943.44,"body":"I agree. Morningstar Farms."},{"startTime":2943.565,"endTime":2948.612,"body":"I walked away from the Morrissey video,"},{"startTime":2943.565,"endTime":2948.612,"body":"but I yeah, I, I do eat meat."},{"startTime":2948.612,"endTime":2951.073,"body":"I'm sorry. I appreciate him doing it."},{"startTime":2951.073,"endTime":2954.618,"body":"But he also does the thing"},{"startTime":2951.073,"endTime":2954.618,"body":"where he just like it."},{"startTime":2954.618,"endTime":2957.621,"body":"He's canceled"},{"startTime":2954.618,"endTime":2957.621,"body":"like he's walked off stage if he like,"},{"startTime":2957.788,"endTime":2960.707,"body":"smelled me cooking Oh."},{"startTime":2960.707,"endTime":2964.378,"body":"At festival like outside lands"},{"startTime":2960.707,"endTime":2964.378,"body":"or something or like Coachella where he,"},{"startTime":2964.461,"endTime":2966.922,"body":"he knew what he was getting into. Yeah."},{"startTime":2966.922,"endTime":2967.631,"body":"Eating meat."},{"startTime":2967.631,"endTime":2968.298,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":2968.298,"endTime":2971.927,"body":"One song and then leave like that's his,"},{"startTime":2968.298,"endTime":2971.927,"body":"that's become"},{"startTime":2971.927,"endTime":2975.889,"body":"his legacy is like being a racist"},{"startTime":2971.927,"endTime":2975.889,"body":"and not doing his show."},{"startTime":2975.973,"endTime":2978.058,"body":"Wait a second, Amy."},{"startTime":2978.1,"endTime":2979.226,"body":"If it just"},{"startTime":2979.226,"endTime":2982.938,"body":"if you don't eat meat, that doesn't"},{"startTime":2979.226,"endTime":2982.938,"body":"necessarily make you a racist."},{"startTime":2983.021,"endTime":2985.524,"body":"Do you know what I'm saying?"},{"startTime":2985.524,"endTime":2988.527,"body":"How do y."},{"startTime":2988.735,"endTime":2989.569,"body":"Believe."},{"startTime":2989.569,"endTime":2992.28,"body":"Don't eat these."},{"startTime":2992.28,"endTime":2993.281,"body":"I'm the opposite, though."},{"startTime":2993.281,"endTime":2994.241,"body":"I'm saying don't."},{"startTime":2994.241,"endTime":2994.908,"body":"Don't eat pigs."},{"startTime":2994.908,"endTime":2998.245,"body":"No matter what color they are."},{"startTime":2994.908,"endTime":2998.245,"body":"I don't care."},{"startTime":2998.328,"endTime":2999.329,"body":"I don't agree."},{"startTime":2999.329,"endTime":3000.58,"body":"Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":3000.58,"endTime":3002.666,"body":"That's also"},{"startTime":3002.666,"endTime":3004.501,"body":"I'm. For call me a pig."},{"startTime":3004.501,"endTime":3004.918,"body":"I mean."},{"startTime":3004.918,"endTime":3007.212,"body":"No, no, no, no."},{"startTime":3007.212,"endTime":3009.548,"body":"I do. Or as a friend,"},{"startTime":3009.548,"endTime":3010.465,"body":"if she's one."},{"startTime":3010.465,"endTime":3012.759,"body":"Of my favorite friends of yours,"},{"startTime":3010.465,"endTime":3012.759,"body":"by the way. Amy."},{"startTime":3012.759,"endTime":3014.344,"body":"Yeah, she's fucking hilarious."},{"startTime":3014.344,"endTime":3017.055,"body":"Well, Caitlin told me how much I was going"},{"startTime":3014.344,"endTime":3017.055,"body":"to. Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":3017.055,"endTime":3017.931,"body":"All right, go on."},{"startTime":3017.931,"endTime":3018.682,"body":"We finish your story."},{"startTime":3018.682,"endTime":3020.809,"body":"I interrupted about ten times."},{"startTime":3020.809,"endTime":3022.477,"body":"No, about going to see you."},{"startTime":3022.477,"endTime":3025.856,"body":"Went to see the Smiths or just."},{"startTime":3025.897,"endTime":3027.399,"body":"Oh, I'm sorry."},{"startTime":3027.399,"endTime":3029.484,"body":"Okay, I will say this."},{"startTime":3029.484,"endTime":3032.195,"body":"We did meet Loretta Lynn."},{"startTime":3032.195,"endTime":3032.988,"body":"We tried."},{"startTime":3032.988,"endTime":3035.49,"body":"Oh, we were right outside her bus"},{"startTime":3032.988,"endTime":3035.49,"body":"because she is."},{"startTime":3035.49,"endTime":3041.121,"body":"And she couldn't like water large"},{"startTime":3035.49,"endTime":3041.121,"body":"and golf cart and possible her 2010 bong"},{"startTime":3041.204,"endTime":3041.58,"body":"in the day"},{"startTime":3041.58,"endTime":3044.833,"body":"before some of her imagine our"},{"startTime":3041.58,"endTime":3044.833,"body":"like let's sing her happy."},{"startTime":3044.916,"endTime":3047.669,"body":"Oh so she's"},{"startTime":3044.916,"endTime":3047.669,"body":"she's being carried on the bus right."},{"startTime":3047.669,"endTime":3049.713,"body":"She's the she's only a right"},{"startTime":3047.669,"endTime":3049.713,"body":"when they pull it."},{"startTime":3049.713,"endTime":3053.3,"body":"We have had the birth and fuckin mean"},{"startTime":3053.3,"endTime":3057.137,"body":"all Loretta Lynn goes,"},{"startTime":3053.3,"endTime":3057.137,"body":"Is it my birthday again already."},{"startTime":3057.22,"endTime":3058.93,"body":"I love that."},{"startTime":3058.93,"endTime":3059.848,"body":"Perfect. In year out."},{"startTime":3059.848,"endTime":3060.932,"body":"It was beautiful."},{"startTime":3060.932,"endTime":3062.726,"body":"It shows how funny she is."},{"startTime":3062.726,"endTime":3064.936,"body":"I think she and her granddaughter"},{"startTime":3062.726,"endTime":3064.936,"body":"come out."},{"startTime":3064.936,"endTime":3068.065,"body":"She was literally sit down in a chair"},{"startTime":3064.936,"endTime":3068.065,"body":"and let someone else sing for hours."},{"startTime":3068.315,"endTime":3069.941,"body":"All right, who cares? But yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":3069.941,"endTime":3071.526,"body":"And she it was a great show."},{"startTime":3071.526,"endTime":3076.114,"body":"But one time her granddaughter"},{"startTime":3071.526,"endTime":3076.114,"body":"was just yucking it up about my grandma"},{"startTime":3076.198,"endTime":3079.576,"body":"and just telling some dumb backstory"},{"startTime":3076.198,"endTime":3079.576,"body":"to the song she was about to sing."},{"startTime":3079.618,"endTime":3082.496,"body":"And then she looked at Loretta"},{"startTime":3079.618,"endTime":3082.496,"body":"and she goes, Oh, yeah,"},{"startTime":3082.496,"endTime":3084.081,"body":"Grandma told me, Don't talk."},{"startTime":3084.081,"endTime":3087.626,"body":"Just saying that I believe her."},{"startTime":3087.709,"endTime":3089.252,"body":"Oh, oh."},{"startTime":3089.252,"endTime":3092.506,"body":"She had someone a couple of years ago"},{"startTime":3089.252,"endTime":3092.506,"body":"that I didn't."},{"startTime":3092.589,"endTime":3093.924,"body":"It's not starstruck."},{"startTime":3093.924,"endTime":3094.8,"body":"It's just like."},{"startTime":3094.8,"endTime":3097.302,"body":"Like I met Mike Myers very briefly."},{"startTime":3097.302,"endTime":3102.766,"body":"I'm sure it's more it's"},{"startTime":3097.302,"endTime":3102.766,"body":"like you have added so much to my life."},{"startTime":3102.849,"endTime":3105.852,"body":"I never seen you in person or met you."},{"startTime":3106.061,"endTime":3107.646,"body":"And I just want to say thanks."},{"startTime":3107.646,"endTime":3109.356,"body":"Yeah, that's it."},{"startTime":3109.356,"endTime":3113.318,"body":"I've never like, Oh my God, I look good"},{"startTime":3109.356,"endTime":3113.318,"body":"and I don't want to, like,"},{"startTime":3113.401,"endTime":3114.486,"body":"so many people are shitty."},{"startTime":3114.486,"endTime":3118.865,"body":"I just, you know, don't meet your heroes"},{"startTime":3114.486,"endTime":3118.865,"body":"and you don't want to be let down"},{"startTime":3118.949,"endTime":3120.033,"body":"by an interaction."},{"startTime":3120.033,"endTime":3122.285,"body":"But he was so sweet and it was very brief."},{"startTime":3122.285,"endTime":3126.873,"body":"It was also at like"},{"startTime":3122.285,"endTime":3126.873,"body":"a promo event for his show."},{"startTime":3126.957,"endTime":3129.96,"body":"It was an explicit like,"},{"startTime":3126.957,"endTime":3129.96,"body":"I'm here to meet people thing."},{"startTime":3130.001,"endTime":3130.919,"body":"Yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":3130.919,"endTime":3132.003,"body":"I saw him in a restaurant."},{"startTime":3132.003,"endTime":3133.922,"body":"Yeah. Don't bother anybody."},{"startTime":3133.922,"endTime":3135.841,"body":"I feel like, yeah."},{"startTime":3135.841,"endTime":3140.053,"body":"I'd like to meet Carol BURNETT"},{"startTime":3135.841,"endTime":3140.053,"body":"because my mama used to always watch."},{"startTime":3140.137,"endTime":3142.139,"body":"Yeah, we were married."},{"startTime":3140.137,"endTime":3142.139,"body":"My mom and I used to."},{"startTime":3142.139,"endTime":3145.058,"body":"That's what we used to watch all the time."},{"startTime":3142.139,"endTime":3145.058,"body":"Now I would have loved to."},{"startTime":3145.058,"endTime":3149.563,"body":"My dad wrote her fan"},{"startTime":3145.058,"endTime":3149.563,"body":"letters in the Gary Moore days."},{"startTime":3149.563,"endTime":3151.064,"body":"Oh, okay."},{"startTime":3151.064,"endTime":3152.566,"body":"And she wrote him back."},{"startTime":3152.566,"endTime":3154.985,"body":"Wow. At some point,"},{"startTime":3152.566,"endTime":3154.985,"body":"this is the weirdest thing ever."},{"startTime":3154.985,"endTime":3155.235,"body":"You know,"},{"startTime":3155.235,"endTime":3159.281,"body":"your parents reveal revealing one strange"},{"startTime":3155.235,"endTime":3159.281,"body":"thing about themselves and your kids. Mm."},{"startTime":3159.364,"endTime":3159.698,"body":"He was"},{"startTime":3159.698,"endTime":3162.784,"body":"like, Come in here and pull a box out"},{"startTime":3159.698,"endTime":3162.784,"body":"from under the bed."},{"startTime":3162.784,"endTime":3165.745,"body":"And there's, like, the letter"},{"startTime":3162.784,"endTime":3165.745,"body":"and the autograph."},{"startTime":3165.745,"endTime":3167.205,"body":"I cried."},{"startTime":3167.205,"endTime":3169.332,"body":"I teared up"},{"startTime":3167.205,"endTime":3169.332,"body":"when she showed up on the Emmys."},{"startTime":3169.332,"endTime":3171.877,"body":"I just always think, like,"},{"startTime":3169.332,"endTime":3171.877,"body":"if you're hyper famous"},{"startTime":3171.877,"endTime":3175.13,"body":"and you're someone like that, that you've"},{"startTime":3171.877,"endTime":3175.13,"body":"just, like, brought people so much joy"},{"startTime":3175.213,"endTime":3179.009,"body":"that either I don't know, I'm"},{"startTime":3175.213,"endTime":3179.009,"body":"going to be disappointed by you, or"},{"startTime":3179.217,"endTime":3183.013,"body":"I feel bad because you're known"},{"startTime":3179.217,"endTime":3183.013,"body":"as a nice giving person."},{"startTime":3183.096,"endTime":3187.267,"body":"And I'm like,"},{"startTime":3183.096,"endTime":3187.267,"body":"Don't spend any emotional labor on me. Oh."},{"startTime":3187.35,"endTime":3188.977,"body":"Williams thing I'm sure you friends with."},{"startTime":3188.977,"endTime":3191.938,"body":"It's just like"},{"startTime":3188.977,"endTime":3191.938,"body":"I wrote for the show that before he died."},{"startTime":3192.022,"endTime":3193.148,"body":"Oh, man. And I."},{"startTime":3193.148,"endTime":3195.275,"body":"Oh, and it was called the Crazy Ones."},{"startTime":3195.275,"endTime":3196.651,"body":"And now I have to, like,"},{"startTime":3196.651,"endTime":3200.447,"body":"bring myself back into the conversation"},{"startTime":3196.651,"endTime":3200.447,"body":"a thousand more times."},{"startTime":3200.488,"endTime":3203.783,"body":"But we, we wrote for the show and,"},{"startTime":3200.488,"endTime":3203.783,"body":"you know, he died."},{"startTime":3203.783,"endTime":3206.286,"body":"And I was really good friends with the"},{"startTime":3203.783,"endTime":3206.286,"body":"the head writers."},{"startTime":3206.286,"endTime":3211.291,"body":"And I when he died, I called him"},{"startTime":3206.286,"endTime":3211.291,"body":"and said, hey, it's not your fault."},{"startTime":3211.374,"endTime":3213.001,"body":"That's perfect."},{"startTime":3213.001,"endTime":3217.255,"body":"As if someone's known"},{"startTime":3213.001,"endTime":3217.255,"body":"for giving people that time and that."},{"startTime":3217.339,"endTime":3218.548,"body":"He was so sweet."},{"startTime":3218.548,"endTime":3221.009,"body":"And being sweet, I feel almost even worse."},{"startTime":3221.009,"endTime":3223.553,"body":"Oh, on me. Yeah."},{"startTime":3223.553,"endTime":3229.309,"body":"Because, you know, as a comic,"},{"startTime":3223.553,"endTime":3229.309,"body":"even with 1/1000000 of the audience,"},{"startTime":3229.309,"endTime":3233.688,"body":"that it is like emotionally or like,"},{"startTime":3229.309,"endTime":3233.688,"body":"it's a lot of energy to give to people"},{"startTime":3233.772,"endTime":3237.4,"body":"after shows"},{"startTime":3233.772,"endTime":3237.4,"body":"that you're going to give, you know,"},{"startTime":3237.484,"endTime":3240.237,"body":"oh, at that level,"},{"startTime":3237.484,"endTime":3240.237,"body":"I can't imagine how you feel."},{"startTime":3240.237,"endTime":3243.073,"body":"Yeah, it is. Huh?"},{"startTime":3243.073,"endTime":3244.574,"body":"Oh. I can't."},{"startTime":3244.574,"endTime":3246.284,"body":"See if anybody. Saw."},{"startTime":3246.284,"endTime":3249.287,"body":"If anybody if anybody just starts"},{"startTime":3246.284,"endTime":3249.287,"body":"with a compliment to me."},{"startTime":3249.287,"endTime":3251.122,"body":"I can't wait to spend time with them."},{"startTime":3251.122,"endTime":3253.416,"body":"Yeah, you're the best friend or anybody."},{"startTime":3253.416,"endTime":3255.21,"body":"All right. So. Yeah."},{"startTime":3255.21,"endTime":3256.836,"body":"What if you do a lot of shows?"},{"startTime":3256.836,"endTime":3258.838,"body":"Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah, Yeah."},{"startTime":3258.838,"endTime":3260.632,"body":"You have to keep meeting people and keep."},{"startTime":3260.632,"endTime":3261.967,"body":"Yeah, yeah."},{"startTime":3261.967,"endTime":3263.51,"body":"I know."},{"startTime":3263.51,"endTime":3268.807,"body":"Well, Amy is known for that."},{"startTime":3268.89,"endTime":3270.684,"body":"For a bit after sense, I promise."},{"startTime":3270.684,"endTime":3272.519,"body":"You. Definitely."},{"startTime":3272.519,"endTime":3277.774,"body":"I mean, I don't know, I, I feel really"},{"startTime":3272.519,"endTime":3277.774,"body":"grateful when anyone comes to see me."},{"startTime":3277.983,"endTime":3278.275,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3278.275,"endTime":3281.278,"body":"Or people who take a chance"},{"startTime":3278.275,"endTime":3281.278,"body":"and just, like, go to the comedy club"},{"startTime":3281.319,"endTime":3284.281,"body":"and which I don't want to like"},{"startTime":3281.319,"endTime":3284.281,"body":"pat people on the back"},{"startTime":3284.281,"endTime":3287.909,"body":"for seeing a random woman,"},{"startTime":3284.281,"endTime":3287.909,"body":"but it still is like that."},{"startTime":3287.909,"endTime":3288.66,"body":"Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":3288.66,"endTime":3289.786,"body":"Like things."},{"startTime":3289.786,"endTime":3292.789,"body":"Yeah. Believing that I might be good."},{"startTime":3293.039,"endTime":3295.0,"body":"Oh, I know, I know. I want. To like."},{"startTime":3295.0,"endTime":3303.925,"body":"I want to give them that time, you know,"},{"startTime":3295.0,"endTime":3303.925,"body":"and just say thank you, Amy."},{"startTime":3304.009,"endTime":3305.385,"body":"You're the best."},{"startTime":3305.385,"endTime":3307.262,"body":"I love you. I'm so glad we got to me."},{"startTime":3307.262,"endTime":3308.43,"body":"Okay. Okay."},{"startTime":3308.43,"endTime":3311.725,"body":"Oh, people going to see me"},{"startTime":3308.43,"endTime":3311.725,"body":"all over the place on my website."},{"startTime":3311.725,"endTime":3312.684,"body":"Similar comedy dot"},{"startTime":3312.684,"endTime":3317.564,"body":"com and follow me on Instagram"},{"startTime":3312.684,"endTime":3317.564,"body":"because that is the most important thing."},{"startTime":3317.564,"endTime":3321.151,"body":"Yeah. It's incredible. Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":3321.192,"endTime":3324.195,"body":"Everyone"},{"startTime":3321.192,"endTime":3324.195,"body":"that's listening, it's so easy to do."},{"startTime":3324.404,"endTime":3326.656,"body":"You can change my life. Yeah."},{"startTime":3326.656,"endTime":3328.45,"body":"Yes, yes."},{"startTime":3328.45,"endTime":3331.911,"body":"Even. Do you know my thing?"},{"startTime":3331.953,"endTime":3335.165,"body":"But what's your handle on that?"},{"startTime":3335.165,"endTime":3337.334,"body":"It's Amy Miller comedy at work."},{"startTime":3337.334,"endTime":3338.668,"body":"So on Instagram."},{"startTime":3338.668,"endTime":3339.586,"body":"Great."},{"startTime":3339.586,"endTime":3342.63,"body":"Your clips are funny and give me so good."},{"startTime":3342.63,"endTime":3343.84,"body":"Yeah. My God."},{"startTime":3343.84,"endTime":3345.05,"body":"Sometimes."},{"startTime":3345.05,"endTime":3346.926,"body":"But it it's just becoming such a thing."},{"startTime":3346.926,"endTime":3348.261,"body":"It's like, I know we have to wrap."},{"startTime":3348.261,"endTime":3349.637,"body":"I know."},{"startTime":3349.637,"endTime":3350.764,"body":"Thing like there's."},{"startTime":3350.764,"endTime":3353.016,"body":"Talk about. It like a lot of podcasts too."},{"startTime":3353.016,"endTime":3357.479,"body":"Comedy podcasts, even that are already"},{"startTime":3353.016,"endTime":3357.479,"body":"very, very successful and lucrative,"},{"startTime":3357.562,"endTime":3360.065,"body":"are now booking"},{"startTime":3357.562,"endTime":3360.065,"body":"based on number of followers."},{"startTime":3360.065,"endTime":3362.692,"body":"Oh, shit. Are you kidding?"},{"startTime":3362.692,"endTime":3364.819,"body":"Oh, my God."},{"startTime":3364.819,"endTime":3366.905,"body":"Oh. Yeah."},{"startTime":3366.905,"endTime":3368.281,"body":"God, I didn't know that."},{"startTime":3368.281,"endTime":3369.866,"body":"It's so. It's embarrassing."},{"startTime":3369.866,"endTime":3372.786,"body":"Yeah, but clubs are booking"},{"startTime":3369.866,"endTime":3372.786,"body":"based on that too, now."},{"startTime":3372.786,"endTime":3374.621,"body":"And it's just like, okay, now over."},{"startTime":3374.621,"endTime":3376.748,"body":"And you can have my and I'm like, we."},{"startTime":3376.748,"endTime":3380.585,"body":"But I've been doing this amount"},{"startTime":3376.748,"endTime":3380.585,"body":"and I'm like, You have an audience."},{"startTime":3380.668,"endTime":3382.045,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3382.045,"endTime":3384.714,"body":"I mean, I do this"},{"startTime":3382.045,"endTime":3384.714,"body":"because I want to get out of bed."},{"startTime":3384.714,"endTime":3388.051,"body":"I mean, if I didn't, if Daniel wasn't at"},{"startTime":3384.714,"endTime":3388.051,"body":"the door, I would just be in bed all day."},{"startTime":3388.051,"endTime":3389.928,"body":"Yeah. To do this."},{"startTime":3389.928,"endTime":3392.347,"body":"Right. Face. Time. Yes, please do."},{"startTime":3392.347,"endTime":3394.057,"body":"You can definitely call me Amy."},{"startTime":3394.057,"endTime":3396.351,"body":"I'm up to four one, right? Yeah."},{"startTime":3396.351,"endTime":3397.685,"body":"Do you follow Amy?"},{"startTime":3397.685,"endTime":3399.562,"body":"Yeah. Oh."},{"startTime":3399.562,"endTime":3401.481,"body":"Yeah. I. Yeah, I'm on tour."},{"startTime":3401.481,"endTime":3404.359,"body":"I got a bunch of dates. Oh, good."},{"startTime":3401.481,"endTime":3404.359,"body":"So they can just."},{"startTime":3404.359,"endTime":3407.362,"body":"Want you to call him now. Yeah. Yeah."},{"startTime":3407.362,"endTime":3411.282,"body":"And I was laughing just that"},{"startTime":3407.362,"endTime":3411.282,"body":"I saw just one of your wedding photos."},{"startTime":3411.408,"endTime":3414.285,"body":"Um, we are, like, drinking out of a hose."},{"startTime":3414.285,"endTime":3415.954,"body":"Oh, yeah."},{"startTime":3416.037,"endTime":3417.038,"body":"That's so cute."},{"startTime":3417.038,"endTime":3418.998,"body":"I was like, I wasn't."},{"startTime":3418.998,"endTime":3422.961,"body":"But she's a young beauty"},{"startTime":3418.998,"endTime":3422.961,"body":"who's not afraid to drink out of a hose."},{"startTime":3423.002,"endTime":3424.421,"body":"You know, hose water tastes good."},{"startTime":3424.421,"endTime":3425.38,"body":"You know, if that."},{"startTime":3425.38,"endTime":3426.881,"body":"Yeah, it's a tinny."},{"startTime":3426.881,"endTime":3429.926,"body":"And water."},{"startTime":3430.093,"endTime":3431.344,"body":"Delicious."},{"startTime":3431.344,"endTime":3433.43,"body":"It's so old. I know. It's like."},{"startTime":3433.43,"endTime":3436.391,"body":"I love the smell of the shock. Oh, yeah."},{"startTime":3436.391,"endTime":3437.225,"body":"It was good."},{"startTime":3437.225,"endTime":3439.686,"body":"I want a very funny joke about that."},{"startTime":3439.686,"endTime":3442.147,"body":"And Wanda's latest. Hmm."},{"startTime":3442.147,"endTime":3444.858,"body":"The bug man. Yeah. Oh, really?"},{"startTime":3444.858,"endTime":3445.859,"body":"I made me gay"},{"startTime":3445.859,"endTime":3448.862,"body":"because it was this whole, like,"},{"startTime":3445.859,"endTime":3448.862,"body":"you could make an inch a spooky entrance."},{"startTime":3449.112,"endTime":3452.282,"body":"I did? Yeah. Deadly."},{"startTime":3452.282,"endTime":3454.868,"body":"Just to say nothing went wrong."},{"startTime":3454.868,"endTime":3456.494,"body":"I'll say I'm going. I'm going to."},{"startTime":3456.494,"endTime":3459.497,"body":"I'm going to, like, tap both of you"},{"startTime":3456.494,"endTime":3459.497,"body":"because I like the smell of airplane glue."},{"startTime":3459.706,"endTime":3461.624,"body":"And I like the smell of all glue."},{"startTime":3461.624,"endTime":3463.042,"body":"What is airplane."},{"startTime":3463.042,"endTime":3463.376,"body":"Like?"},{"startTime":3463.376,"endTime":3466.546,"body":"I guess it's like cement"},{"startTime":3463.376,"endTime":3466.546,"body":"glue or any kind of smell glue."},{"startTime":3466.588,"endTime":3469.048,"body":"Yeah, those old like the oak."},{"startTime":3469.048,"endTime":3472.26,"body":"It was like a metal"},{"startTime":3469.048,"endTime":3472.26,"body":"like when you would craft."},{"startTime":3472.427,"endTime":3474.012,"body":"Yeah. Mm."},{"startTime":3474.012,"endTime":3476.389,"body":"I'm, I'm doing that now."},{"startTime":3476.389,"endTime":3478.475,"body":"Mm hmm. Brush."},{"startTime":3478.558,"endTime":3478.85,"body":"Yeah."},{"startTime":3478.85,"endTime":3482.103,"body":"Yeah. Yes, yes. Yeah."},{"startTime":3482.187,"endTime":3483.062,"body":"That's the best."},{"startTime":3483.062,"endTime":3485.315,"body":"That's what I like to. Yeah,"},{"startTime":3483.062,"endTime":3485.315,"body":"it was like that."},{"startTime":3485.315,"endTime":3488.318,"body":"Or the Foleys vestibule,"},{"startTime":3485.315,"endTime":3488.318,"body":"you know, you walk in the door"},{"startTime":3488.318,"endTime":3490.069,"body":"and have to walk through the other door."},{"startTime":3490.069,"endTime":3491.446,"body":"There was this one like."},{"startTime":3491.446,"endTime":3494.115,"body":"What is Foley's department store? Oh, J.C."},{"startTime":3494.115,"endTime":3495.658,"body":"Penney. Oh, Foley's."},{"startTime":3495.658,"endTime":3498.036,"body":"Okay, It smells like that glue."},{"startTime":3498.036,"endTime":3500.538,"body":"I really like a psycho."},{"startTime":3500.538,"endTime":3502.248,"body":"Used to be trying to Smells good."},{"startTime":3502.248,"endTime":3504.0,"body":"And we're all just."},{"startTime":3504.0,"endTime":3506.211,"body":"on glue. Okay, I'll go."},{"startTime":3506.211,"endTime":3506.669,"body":"Thank you."},{"startTime":3506.669,"endTime":3509.797,"body":"Thank you,"},{"startTime":3506.669,"endTime":3509.797,"body":"Amy Miller. Yeah, we'll see you."},{"startTime":3509.881,"endTime":3510.131,"body":"Okay."}]}