Claim Your Awesome

The Power of Choosing Discomfort for Growth and Success

• Jessica Hook

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Are you ready to see what it feels like when you purposely allow yourself to get uncomfortable? Join me as I share how you can actually learn to embrace the discomfort to propel you closer to your goals.

I explore what discomfort actually is and why it is so easy to stay stuck in over-thinking, fear and inaction. You'll learn some simple mindset tools as well as more advanced somatic tools to help you begin to create your own sense of safety as you push your personal growth edges and begin manifesting the best version of yourself and your life.


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https://www.abundancewithease.com/free-mini-course

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Have any questions or comments?
Send me a note at jess@jess-hook.com

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Speaker 1:

Hello, welcome back to the Clean, your Awesome podcast. I'm your host, jess, and I'm super excited that you're here, because today we are going to let ourselves get uncomfortable. So what do I mean by that? Have you ever seen those quotes? And it's like growth is found outside of your comfort zone, right? So we hear those things and we're like, yeah, I get it, I get that growth is on the other side of things being challenging, or at least that's how I've kind of understood it. Right, you have to push yourself a little bit, you have to willing to get out of your comfort zone to grow.

Speaker 1:

But the other day I was thinking about this and I had a kind of a pretty big life lesson or kind of something that I realized. Geez, I really wish I would have understood what this meant so much sooner. And it's the idea that you have to actually choose being uncomfortable if you want to grow. People that have found success have chosen each and every day probably countless times a day to be outside of their comfort zone, to be in discomfort, right, because fear feels uncomfortable, the unknown feels uncomfortable, whatever that may look like, showing up in a way that you're not quite ready for that feels uncomfortable. And I started to reflect on this. I realized that I have been not good at this throughout my life and again, I'm not passing any judgment on myself because I'm realizing that again, this is just kind of a belief in a pattern that was created when I was really young and it has served me and this is what I came to realize. So my parents got divorced when I was young I think I was in first or second grade and for the most part, it was pretty amicable. There wasn't any major trauma. I feel like both of my parents did a decent job of keeping things civil, I'll put it that way.

Speaker 1:

However, I learned at a very young age just how uncomfortable conflict felt. So there wasn't a ton of conflict all the time. I definitely remember that, but clearly, my experience was that I was not as comfortable as I was in my childhood, and my experience was that there was still some conflict here and there being in situations that felt uncomfortable for me. And what I now realize, after doing my own inner work and healing around this, is that my little tiny Jessica, who is old I was interpreting that external conflict to mean something about me. So then, because our body and our brains are constantly sending signals to each other. The discomfort that I felt because of the conflict was then directly correlated to mean something about me and that could look like something different for all of us. But in that moment or in those moments, it was like what did I do wrong? Something doesn't feel right here. This feels scary, this feels unsafe. Again, this is my little innocent brain who hasn't had years of wisdom to help make sense of everything that's going on. In those moments, that little bit of conflict did feel uncertain to me, it did feel scary, it did feel unsafe.

Speaker 1:

So now, as an adult, again avoiding conflict like the plague, because really what I was avoiding is that feeling of not being safe. I was avoiding that feeling of again what does this mean about me? Is something wrong? Right it so, so, so often goes back to just this idea of safety. So if we want to embrace the discomfort, if we want to really meet our own growth edges and start to create and manifest all of the things that we want to experience, it must start with you creating that safety around being uncomfortable. Can you regulate your own nervous system when you feel unsure about something, when you feel uneasy about something? And it's actually such a simple practice because it really just again comes back to being present and you can start really, really, really small with this. You can start in whatever way that feels best for you and really feels safest for you, because, again, it's all about creating that safety and regulating your own nervous system. So, on a mindset level, you can do this by kind of becoming your own super sleuth, right? So just start by bringing awareness to the fact that you feel uncomfortable about something, right?

Speaker 1:

Let's use the example of you want to create a food blog and share recipes that you're creating and you're really passionate about food and you love that, but you keep getting stuck on kind of putting yourself out there in that way. It feels really scary to be seen in that way. And again, yeah, put yourself out there, you know, for all the world to see you and potentially judge you. Right, because ultimately it's like we're making up these stories and it's the stories that actually feel scary. Right, creating a food blog and sharing your recipes, that's amazing. Right, that's fun, that's exciting, that's your passion. You're, like, so excited to do that, right, that's not the scary part. The scary part is holy crap, what if I do this and people see it and then what are they gonna think? And then it's like the scary part is all the thoughts and the beliefs and the fears that we let take control, and it's in those thoughts and fears that we get really uncomfortable. So how can we create safety around that?

Speaker 1:

So, again, just start by bringing awareness to the simple fact of what is it that's making you uncomfortable? Right, you know it's, yeah, maybe building out a website. Maybe you're not super good at that or maybe that's something that you would have to figure out, but I know you can do it. I know you're resourceful, right, it's ultimately not that. Right, there are so many courses, programs, videos on YouTube, chat, gpt, ai, all of these things that literally make it so easy to create anything that you want today. Right, anything that you want. You could literally sit down this afternoon and have a website up and running by this evening. It's so easy.

Speaker 1:

So it's not that we're not resourceful, it's not that we don't know, right, it's that we get stuck. So why are we getting stuck? Where are we getting stuck? And it's in those fears. Because the fears and the thoughts they feel uncomfortable, and it's so much easier to avoid those uncomfortable feelings, right, it feels way safer to just stay exactly where you are. But how is that serving you? Seriously ask yourself right now is that serving you? Maybe in this moment it feels like it is. You're not having to be pushed outside of your comfort zone. But what about in a year when you look back and you think why in the hell did I not create that food blog? Still, I still wanna do it. People love my food, people love my recipes. Why haven't I done it? Right? It's not gonna serve you.

Speaker 1:

So again, just creating that awareness. Start to even just list out what really are all of the fears that you have. What is holding you back from that? What feels the scariest? Where do you really feel that discomfort? Right, when you create awareness around what those beliefs and patterns and thoughts are, you immediately start to reduce their power, because the second we bring presence and acceptance to anything it's like the ego cannot continue to allow those beliefs to be active when we are so present in the awareness of that. So, starting there, that's like just a great mindset shift to start to look at these fears. Start to flip the fears, question them. Are they true? Find examples of how they're not true. Right, just do the work to start to create kind of just like a very high level, easy feeling of being safe in pursuing whatever it is that you want to do next, right, and then just taking the next simplest step that feels good to you, just take this a step farther.

Speaker 1:

If you feel ready, or you feel like the mindset work has not helped you as much in the past, then it's really about grounding yourself in the discomfort and creating that safety for yourself. And a great way to start by doing this is allowing the discomfort to be there. And first, when you do this on your own, I want you to resource yourself first. So I want you to either think of someone that you love, that just you feel so safe around, someone that just fills you with so much like love and goodness. It could even be a pet. You could even just place your hand on a sturdy surface, like your chair or a table nearby, really feeling grounded in the presence of that sturdy surface. And you wanna do this because, again, you want to be able to create safety for yourself. So then you can allow yourself to feel into that discomfort, feel into the fear, feel into the judgment, whatever feels present for you, and as you do this, you'll notice that by just allowing it to be there and accepting it fully, without judgment, the feeling will start to dissipate, right, and you're in total control.

Speaker 1:

When you're doing this, you have the control. If you're feeling like it's getting to be a little bit too much, something's coming up for you, take your mind back to that resource part of you, right, take your mind back to that image of your dog who you just adore and who adores you. Put your hand back on that table whatever feels good to you and then, if you want, and only if it feels good, you can go back into, you know, checking in with your body, finding that discomfort, breathing into it, allowing it to be there and letting it release. Again, this is a little bit more of an advanced step because, as you're doing this, again, you're still bringing that like super intense presence to the situation and really allowing that emotion and that sensation inside your body to release and pass and really, that's all it wanted, right, that's all it needed. So these are just a couple of little ways that you can start to let yourself, you know, be okay in the discomfort, right? So, again, it's like creating safety around it, questioning what's actually true, right, what's actually uncomfortable about it? And again, then, realizing that the beliefs and the thoughts and the judgments that we assign to things are completely unnecessary. Right, we put so much value on what we think things mean about us and it's just so, not true. So, when you can create your own safety around these sensations, your own safety around the sensation of being uncomfortable or feeling nervous, or feel full or just worried, or you know all the things that come up when you're again trying to push, you know your growth edges and step into something bigger than yourself, it makes it so much easier. And really, if you want to create and manifest a different reality than what you are currently experiencing I hate to tell you this, but it requires you to start to shed the layers and release all of the old parts of you that are no longer serving you, all of the parts of the ego, all the parts of the personality, the masks and the roles that you're playing. Right, you have to completely embody that new version of yourself.

Speaker 1:

So, again, using the example of the food blogger, right, how is a successful food blogger, how are you, as a successful food blogger, say, five years from now, showing up? I want you to embody that person right now. Right, come into full alignment with who that person is and that's where you operate right. That will get you to the next level. Because the food blogger in five years they're I don't know anything about a food blog, so I'm just making things up but you know the food blogger in five years. They are putting recipes up daily on their blog. They're promoting it on their social channels. They are maybe collaborating with other food bloggers, they're sharing their stuff on Pinterest. They're you know. Those are the things that they're doing to to again create that successful blog. So how can you embody that today? And there's a lot of action in there, right, and action takes courage. So how can you again create your own safety so that you can take those courageous steps to whatever you want to create?

Speaker 1:

And then the best part actually is, you start to feel really freaking good about yourself because you know what You're showing up and you're proving to yourself just what you're capable of. And that's like what we came here to experience, right. Like if someone just gave you a food blog that was successful and just it was all done for you, it wouldn't be the same, it wouldn't be nearly as exhilarating, wouldn't be nearly as fulfilling, right? You came here to create and to find joy in exactly what your passions are, right, and in the pursuit of all of the things that you want to experience. Right, if someone just plopped down everything that we wanted in front of us, it wouldn't be the same. I think it's easy to think that it would be. I think we get bored really, really quickly. Or we'd just be on to the next thing, right, like plop it down and they're like okay, next Now, what can I do? Right? This is why there's sometimes this feeling of just this need to want to do more and experiencing more and create more.

Speaker 1:

So, yeah, really allowing yourself to embrace, being uncomfortable and letting yourself get really curious about what that even looks like for you, because often, again, the brain just wants like the easiest solution. So it's gonna give us that dopamine hit to stay safe, exactly where we are right now, and that might look like again sitting on the couch binge watching Netflix, scrolling through your social media right, that just feels like the easiest thing. So how can you create safety to actually take action on something that's gonna make you feel really alive and excited and ready to like jump out of bed in the morning. So, in the theme of being uncomfortable and being okay in the discomfort, I want to share just a little behind the scenes of some things that are going on here, because I, again, I want to be super transparent and share some kind of vulnerable things, because I want you to just see, like, how capable you are of really doing anything that you want and everyone truly does start from somewhere and I want to just inspire you to go out and create whatever it is that you want, to create an experience, because that's really where you're gonna just find so much joy and passion and excitement and, really, like, you're just so deserving of that we all are.

Speaker 1:

So I had wanted to run a live workshop a few weeks ago and I had shared it a little bit on social. To be 100% honest, I probably didn't share it enough and I didn't get a single sign up for the workshop. And you know what? I was totally okay with it because I had, again, I've done so much of my own work, right. I was so grounded in not needing people to sign up. I didn't, didn't? I realized that it didn't mean anything about me, right? So what I chose to do and said was get super sleuth on my own you know content and my own messaging and see like, okay, where are there some missing pieces or what? What could I do differently? What could I do instead? So instead I decided that I was gonna create a free mini course that was recorded and it wasn't gonna be live and you could just get an access link.

Speaker 1:

But I was like, well, I'm not gonna create this because I knew it was gonna take me some time to figure it all out. It's the first one I've ever done. I'm not gonna create this and then no one signs up Like, if my messaging isn't quite right or, you know, whatever it may be, I'm gonna just put the messaging out there and then we'll see what happens. And sure enough, probably because I was so surrendered to it, I was so like again grounded in it, willing to just be like, whatever happens it is, I'm just willing to again be like my own mad scientist in my business, trying to figure out what works and just getting really curious around things and honestly, that makes it so much easier and so much more fun. So, sure enough, people start DMing me to get this link for this free mini course. So now I'm like okay, I got a you know, a pedal to the metal. I got to get my act together and I had never done this before, so I wanted to share again to hopefully inspire you.

Speaker 1:

But in two days I figured out how to create a course, create the slides presentation for it, which I did in Canva. Then I was able to record it in Zoom using my screen share to show the presentation that I had made in Canva. Canva actually allows you to record in there through their website, but I didn't have a webcam so I wasn't able to do that. That's why I had to use Zoom. Then I wanted to upload it to a page on my own website, which it was too big to do so. Then I figured out that I can actually put it on YouTube and embed a link from YouTube onto my website and then it allows it to play on the page that you land on. I figured out how to create the page that has asked you to put your email in so that it can send you the link to watch it. I figured it all out and executed it in two days.

Speaker 1:

I was super proud of myself. I had shared a story about this on Instagram and I kind of joke that this may not seem impressive to other people in this business, in this industry. Again, I was super proud of myself because it just shows that I am resourceful, I can figure it out. I know you are too. I know that whatever you have nudging you, calling you towards, you are capable of creating it. Again, take that messy action. I will let this be inspiration to just show up and give it a try and see what happens.

Speaker 1:

I will again just mirror the sentiment from earlier in the podcast Don't let any of it mean anything about you, because that's when you get stuck. I could have gotten so stuck in beating myself up and judging myself for no one signing up to watch my live workshop. But where would that have gotten me? I would have been still upset and mad about it and just frustrated, not taking any action. It's just like no move on, it doesn't mean anything.

Speaker 1:

And figure out what works next.

Speaker 1:

Do the next thing. The most important thing that I've learned is that you have to follow what lights you up. If something like a podcast, the idea, that is really exciting, but the idea of having a website or a blog isn't, then who cares about the website? Focus on the podcast. Just do what lights you up, because that is what you're going to stick with. That's what is really going to be the needle driver for you, because you're going to show up consistently and you're going to be excited and you're going to be willing to learn and you're going to have a whole lot of fun in the process.

Speaker 1:

So I hope all of this was helpful. At the very least, I hope that it serves as a little bit of inspiration and just again nudging you in the direction of whatever is calling you, whatever force is calling you to step into something, into something bigger and maybe a little less comfortable than where you currently are, because there's so much available to you again, when you embrace the discomfort and really choose to push your own growth edges. I will share the link to the free mini course that I created in the show notes and this mini course it's called Release and Receive and it's all about uncovering the limiting beliefs and fears that are blocking you from really receiving more abundance in all areas of your life. So we go through the awareness stage of that and then how to really start to release what those beliefs are, start to reprogram the subconscious mind. So I'll include that in the show notes and, as always, thank you for being here, thank you for listening and I hope you have a beautiful day.