Perimenopause vs. Florida - Hot Flashes and Alligators

In this episode of The High Vibes Experience, I’m getting REAL about what life has looked like lately — navigating Florida chaos, helping care for my cousin with autism and special needs, dealing with perimenopause and hot flashes, and trying to stay grounded through all of it.

This episode is messy, vulnerable, funny at times, emotional at others… and honestly? probably one of my most human episodes yet.

We talk about:

•  Nervous system overload 
•  Caretaking and emotional exhaustion 
•  Hormones, stress, and burnout 
•  Giving yourself grace during hard seasons 
•  What “high vibes” actually looks like in real life 
•  Staying connected to yourself when life feels chaotic 

If you’ve been feeling overstimulated, emotional, exhausted, or like you’re carrying a lot lately… this episode is for you.

https://www.highvibesmethod.com/

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hello, hello, hello, I'm back. This is Megan, and you are listening to the High Vibes experience. So today I want to talk about all things personal. Um, normally I do, you know, how to regulate your nervous system, meditation tips, how to get outside when you don't want to, uh, running stuff. Normally I talk about all these other things, right? But today I want to talk about my life update. I have had a lot of changes um emotionally, mentally, and uh with my body. So I'm gonna talk about all of that. I had a birthday, I am still in Florida, and you know, just a little more of me because if I can't share what's going on with me, I can't share the experience with you. I want you to know, like from the bottom of my heart, like we're all human, we all go through things, we're probably experiencing the same things. And if you don't talk about it, you'll never know that that's happening. So I'll just kind of talk about. I have so much to say today. First of all, I took a little break, okay? I needed to take a break. I um started a new job. It's a nine to five, it's a great job. I'm not gonna say where it is, but it's fabulous. I've never experienced anything like this before. It is super exciting. I love it. Um, great company, great people. All in all, I'm really, really, really excited about it. Uh, I do still plan to do this podcast. Um, however, I'm only like three weeks into my new job, and um, I kind of needed to dedicate my time to that for the for the last month. Also, I had a birthday, I turned 47. Um, that's crazy. Turning 47 is crazy. Um, people, you know what's weird about being 47 and single? Everyone's given up on you. Like, no one has hope that you're ever gonna get married. They don't ask you about babies anymore. Um, they they don't actually they don't even really ask me like, are you dating anyone anymore? And that feels really good, but it also feels like oh, I'm I'm just gonna be left out in the cold um by my loved ones because it's really hard. Like when you decide to be single, which is what I have decided, um people always like say, oh, well, you'll meet someone when you're not looking, or after you've worked on yourself, you'll finally find the person of your dreams and blah blah blah. That's that may be true, but also there's people that don't find love. And I'm kind of good with either scenario. Like, would I love to have a double income? A hundred percent. It is incredibly more difficult to pay for everything by yourself than it is to have two incomes contributing to one household. That is a fact. Um, but I would never be with someone for that reason, like ever. And it would be amazing to have somebody that wants to go running with me or wants to cheer me on at my races, or wants to go walk the beach at dinner time with my dog or with our dogs, or wants to travel and have adventures together. Like I still very much so want that in my life. But I have spent, I would say, probably 10 years, I yeah, probably 10 years. I've dated some people in that 10-year span, but I've spent so much of that time building this like protective bubble of energy around my soul, and it is very peaceful. And so for me to allow that peace to be like, or that little sphere of energy to be broken, I don't even want to, I don't even want to entertain that. Like it's scary, you know, but also it would have to be someone with that same ball of energy surrounding them because I've done so much inner work, I can smell the bullshit before you even say it. Like I can see it, I can sense it, I can feel it. I and I think that repels certain people, which is a good thing. So just so you know, if you're curious, I'm good. Like I'm good being single, I'm happy. Um, do I still want someone, a partner? Yes, of course, I do. Um, but I kind of feel I feel good right now. At the same time, I am open. I remain open. I my heart is open. If you feel like you have the perfect person for me, don't hesitate. But also, I'm good. So, anyway, okay, so life update. I'm in Florida still. I moved here in November. It is now May, crazy, Memorial Day weekend. And I have a new job. And I don't know if I ever really talked about why I moved to Florida. It's kind of complex. Um, my mom called me a couple years ago and said, Hey, I want to move to the villages. And I was like, Who the hell are you? And where's my mother? Um, my mom is 82. She is a spunky, energetic ball of fire. And for her to say she wants to live in a retirement community, that kind of blew me away because I previously worked in senior living communities. I know the industry. I'm very anti-senior living community. I would never put her in a home. And she knows that. We've had talks about that. It's just not in her future, period. Um, and so I've always known that, like, when it gets to a point where she needs help, I will be there. And if I'm not there, I will hire someone to be with her. You know what I mean? Um, but she will be in her house, she will be independent as long as she possibly can be. She is not going into a community. End of story. Like, that's just we've talked about it. We've made plans for that. Um, and so when she said she wanted to move to the villages, which is a retirement community, I think there's like a hundred thousand people here now. When I say retirement community, though, it is loosely based. Like everybody that I've met has been in their 50s and 60s, a little bit of the 70s. So my mom kind of feels old in the villages, ironically. But the thing is, we have Audrey, my cousin. And Audrey, my cousin, has special needs. Um, long story short, my mom is her guardian. And Audrey is 37. Um, she has autism and a few other things. And I would say her her mind is about nine or 10 years old. Um, I love her to pieces. And when my mom became her guardian, um it was decided that if anything happens to my mom, I will become her guardian. I will be next in line and I will care for Audrey. And that was my idea, my mom's idea. We all agreed on it. And um, you know, I don't have any other kids, and I'm totally capable of doing that. So when my mom decided to move to Florida, I felt like I also need to be in Florida. I need to be near them, you know, not because anything's wrong with my mom, but you just never know. And days, um, you just never know. And I want to be close to them. I want to be um in the same state at the very least. And also I wanted to learn everything I could from my mom because my mom was a psychiatric nurse back in the day, and so she has a lot of knowledge about how to care for someone with special needs, but not only that, the villages has all of these incredible special needs programs. So Audrey is thriving, okay? She is her social calendar is full. Like we just spent last weekend in Orlando at the Special Olympics for her cheerleading team. And it was amazing. And it was Audrey's first time with a team, staying in a hotel with her teammates. That was a big uh ordeal for her, you know. And of course, after the competition, we took her to Disney World because when we got here, we we all gave we all got passes um to Disney and it's already paid for itself. It's amazing. Just being able to go whenever you want, even if it's for a couple of hours, it's highly, highly recommend, man. If it's um, you know, when you buy a day pass, you feel this pressure to get everything done. But when you have a when you have an annual pass, kind of like a season pass for skiing or snowboarding, you can just go for a couple hours. It's no big deal. So, and they even let you bring in your own food now, which is awesome. Or they they always have, but anyway, Audrey loves Disney movies. And so for her, this is like the best thing in the world. She relates to Disney movies, she can even like communicate her feelings through Disney movies. Um, and I'm trying to learn as much as I can about autism and about how to communicate with someone with autism, but also like teach valuable lessons and rules and things that she's never had before. Because before she came to my mom, she was really on her own a lot and just basically playing video games 24-7. And uh I don't know what she was doing, but she was alone a lot, and um, she was alone in a dark room a lot, and so now she has you know consequences and she has a schedule and she has activities and she doesn't always like it, you know? And like because I've never been a mom, I don't know what the heck I'm doing. I'm just doing the best that I can, and um, so is my mom. I know that with me, my mom was strict, and my brother and sister would probably disagree with you, but or disagree with me on that. But I had rules, and if I broke the rules, there were consequences. And like, if I didn't clean my room, my mom would take my desk and empty every single thing out in the middle of the hallway. It was devastating as a teenager. If I slammed the door, I'd come home and the door would be off the hinges. And like it happened a few times, you know, and like that's the way that it was. So she was pretty tough on me. She was also pretty lenient on me as well. There were other things that I had like I had a lot of freedom. I wasn't, you know, if I was able to go to parties in high school, and she always said, like, look, you go to a party, that's fine. But no matter what, if you need a ride home and your friends are drinking or whatever, you call me, I'll come pick you guys up, no questions asked. And she did. She picked us up a few times in the minivan and picked up all my friends. And um, so I really like my mom and I are close, but my mom gets frustrated sometimes. And I think it's because we, you know, Audrey comes off as if she is very independent, she can socialize, she can have a small conversation, and so you think she's a lot more like advanced than she is. But if you ask her how something happened or why something happened, or what, she can't explain that. And so we're all learning, like the three of us are all learning to adjust together, and it's been six months, and I'm also like trying to figure out okay, like at some point, eventually down the road, it's probably just gonna be me and Audrey, or me and Audrey and my partner, you know, or whatever, if I meet, if I ever meet somebody, but so we started a few things. Uh, we have a a whiteboard calendar, which is awesome. Highly recommend. This has been a game changer. So I always fill it out for the whole month and it's really big, and um, I make it with different colors and I put everything on the calendar. And I'm telling you, Audrey comes and looks at that calendar every single morning and she does everything that's on that calendar. So if I say water aerobics at nine, shower, wash hair, clean room, well, she her version of clean room, you know. So she will get ready for swim, she's ready to go at 9 a.m. She's so excited, and then afterwards, she comes home, she looks at the calendar, she goes and takes a shower and washes her hair, and it's just really good, like reminder. And then on the side of the calendar, I have a little list of rules which have changed. At first, there were no rules, and then I had to add, okay, you can no longer bring your cell phone or your camera to any activities. Um, she's obsessed with taking pictures. Obsessed, thousands of pictures a day. And we've been getting complaints during her classes that she is going out and taking pictures instead of being a part of the activity, and that's not allowed, you know, like she's on a cheer team, she can't be missing practice to take pictures. It's also very distracting and rude. And so I put no longer allowed to take cell phone or camera to activities. And I I'm telling you, she probably brought me to that calendar 15 times saying, I don't like the rules, I don't like rules, I don't care, I don't like rules, and it's so hard to explain because she doesn't understand why she has the rules, you know, and um but she's been doing it against her will. She's been not bringing her cell phone and not bringing her camera, and that's good. Um, but some things have come up that, like, if you also have this experience, I'd like you to please reach out to me because I'm just curious if this is a problem for a lot of people that have autism, because uh adults with autism are special and there are so many gifts that they have, like she's so creative and so loving, and she's always got a smile on her face, and um you know that's so rare and wonderful. Um, but then there's also like a very sneaky side to her, and if she wants something and I say, No, you can't have it, is she going to steal it? I'm like, we're actually concerned if she's going to steal things. There have been a couple times where we've said, no, you can't have any more batteries for your camera. And then all of a sudden, she has batteries. And it's like, where'd you get those batteries? You don't have any money. Where'd you get them? And there have been times when she's asked me for a sticker at Disney World, and I say, No, you can't have that sticker. Um, because she doesn't do anything with the stickers, and we're trying to teach her that Disney World does not like to sell stickers because people put stickers all over the property, and then janitors have to clean it up, and that's like a real thing. So we're trying to teach her, no, you cannot have a sticker from Disney World, but you can have stickers from from other places, and then we can put it in your book together, you know. And so she's I said, No, you can't have a sticker, not today, not ever. And then she went and asked somebody for a sticker and they gave it to her. Oh anyway, I don't know if you have someone living with you that has autism. Do you have some anything? Do you have sneakiness or stealing going on? I'm just curious because, you know, if somebody, if she got caught stealing a sticker from a store in Disney World, she'd be banned for life. So that's like a terrible consequence. And I've told her that, but I don't think she understands or cares. And and to be clear, I don't know that she has ever stolen a sticker from Disney World. I'm just saying, like, I could see it happening because she's always very sneaky. She won't let, you know, she just, it just kind of, she just kind of looks like she's about to steal something. And I'm always like, come with me, follow me, Audrey. You know, so stressful. But this last trip to Disney World was rough. Um, for the most part, it's great. And like when I take her by myself, she's actually on really, really good behavior. We have a good time, but you know, when she doesn't get to do things she wants to do, she freaks out. And it's it's probably the same as having children, I would imagine. But I also feel like it's super important to be to say no sometimes. And if you don't say no sometimes, they never learn that sometimes you cannot have that sticker, sometimes you cannot have that cheeseburger. Sometimes, you know, sometimes you have to have rules. And when you break the rules, there are consequences. And so now the new rule is you're no longer allowed to bring the backpack to Disney World, you're no longer allowed to bring the camera to Disney World. We will take pictures and send them to your phone. And then you can upload them onto your computer. And that's just the way it is, and she hates it. But she acted so terribly the whole three days we were there, it was like exhausting. And my poor mom, you know, my poor mom is trying so hard. And we both we both are, you know, but like my mom is unable to take the time for herself to go meet people here in the villages. And I am like in this place where I don't I can't meet anybody. I'm working. If I'm not working, I'm required by my mom to like give her social time because I'm the only adult that she's hanging out with. And like it's starting to feel very codependent, and like I am having a hard time because I need personal space, I need alone time. I am like that, I need it, I have to have it, and so I've been really working hard at just telling her, like, mom, I just need 10 minutes, okay? And I'll go sit outside in the sun and just like listen to the birds in some silence. I also have this hearing condition where it's like very um overstimulating, and I hear exceptionally well. Um, and it's It's it's kind of difficult um to always have somebody talking to you. And anyway, I'm not trying to like complain about the situation because I'm not upset about the situation. I feel like we're making a lot of progress, but I'm also just trying to do the best that I can. And that's why why I wanted to say this. That's why I wanted to talk about it during this episode. Because I know that like parents, people that have loved ones that are living with them, people that are caring for their family members, nobody gets to talk about it. And nobody gets to say how they're actually feeling. And so hopefully, by me doing this, you are also feeling heard and understood. And if you're going through this also, like we were all in this together and we're doing a wonderful thing by caring for our loved ones, and and that's beautiful, you know. So, all in all, things are really good. I love Audrey so much, and um, I'm I'm actually so grateful that I have this opportunity because um it's been so much fun. I mean, we've spent so much time laughing too. And I got my mom to go on a scary roller coaster, not once, but twice on Sunday, which was great. And, you know, my mom, I think for the first time, feels like she has help. Because she's been a single mom for a long time. I mean, when she was taking care of me, it was just me and her. And there was nobody helping, you know. And so I just think that she feels good and like it's really nice. And also it's nice for me, too. So that is my update on Audrey, my mom, my job, love my job, um, reason for coming to Florida. But then let me just tell you about perimenopause, okay? I turned 47 in April, April 25th, and I'm in the thick of it. Like, I used to make fun of my sister for all the hot flashes that she was getting. I feel like I wish I could take back every single time I made fun of her for that because it is horrible. I'm in the trenches, you guys. Um I am considering HRT, which is hormone replacement therapy, but then there's like all these articles that say don't do that if you have Hashimoto's. I've got Hashimoto's and hypothyroidism, so there's that. I'm also in the phase of healing my inflammation and my gut, so I'm eating all these crazy things. Like I'm eating pineapple every day because it's good for my gut health and like chia seeds, and I eat healthy anyway, but like there are certain foods that I really shouldn't have. Like, I really should not have tomatoes, I really shouldn't have bell peppers, and obviously, dairy and gluten should not have any of that. Nobody should have any of that, but um, anyway, so I'm like in the thick of trying to figure out what works for my body. Oh, I'm also not supposed to do long distance running because that spikes your cortisol and fucks up your immune system and your Hashimoto's and your hypothyroidism. It's a mess. And then on top of it, it's 90 degrees outside and I'm sweating during shivasana in yoga. Okay. When you have a hot flash in the middle of shivasana, that's like that's when I hit the all-time low. I that was like the worst experience I've ever had. Like, I, first of all, I thrive in shivasana. If you don't know what shivasana is, it is corpse pose. At the end of every yoga class, which is the delicious, yummy part of yoga, the teacher tells you, okay, get comfortable on the ground. You're gonna close your eyes for like three to five minutes. Usually it's like they're playing some nice soothing sound in the background. Sometimes they'll uh spray like some essential oil or like they'll do a little gong or a little ching, uh chime. Sometimes they'll even come up to you and like touch your forehead. Every yoga teacher is different. Here in the villages, they're not hands-on at all, they just kind of like teach the class. Um, but in like a traditional yoga class, like in a studio, yoga studio, you will get, I personally think, much more hands-on teachers, and I love that. Um, so anyway, I'm in Shivasana. Now, this has happened twice, two times, and I'm trying to get comfortable, and then all of a sudden, I feel it. The heat radiating from my core to my chest. All of a sudden, my face is dripping sweat. I was so sweaty that my legs were sweating, okay? And I was having a full-on hot flash panic attack in the middle of freaking shivasana. Couldn't even enjoy it. I had to fan myself off. It was absolutely miserable. And then at the end of the class, I thought, you know what? I think she turned the heat on. I think she turned the heat up during shivasana. How dare her. Um, anyway. Perimenopause sucks. Okay. I am definitely going through it. I am waking up sweaty. I am sweating all the time. In the most embarrassing moments, I now carry a personalized fan. And at my computer, at my desk, because I do have video meetings like all day, every day. I have to have a little fan blowing on my face all the time. This is my new reality. So um, I'm really excited. I'm gonna go have some lab work done. I'm also gonna get on some um HRT. I'm gonna do whatever the fuck it takes to get rid of these hot flashes. Okay. I it's miserable. And on top of it, it's not even summertime, you guys. It's not even summertime. The weather is going to get so much worse here in Florida. I was living in La La Land. You know, I moved here in November. It was nice. I'd wake up, it was a cool 55 degrees, perfect running weather. Now I wake up, I go outside. It literally feels like I'm being trapped inside of a cooking rice cooker with bugs flying in my face. That's what it feels like. It was 78 degrees at 5:30 this morning. 100% humidity. I went outside, opened the front door immediately sweating, had not even taken a single step. I mean, and you know what's crazy? I'm out there running and I'll see other people out there, and not very many runners here in the villages, but there's a lot of people out walking, and I'm drenched. I mean, I'm soaking wet. Okay. My shirt had, you know, I look like one of those dudes that's like soaking wet. Their whole shirt is like drenched. I wear um athletic clothes, so like, you know, they have that material where you can see where the wet, the, the sweat is and stuff, but they do dry quick. So I'm drenched, and I can see, I can see the look on their face going, wow, she's sweating. Yikes. You know, and they're just like breezefully walking. Well, newsflash, I would be sweating if I was walking too. So nothing new. And then I read, Well, if you get Botox on your face, that can stop you from sweating um on your face. And I'm can't I am considering it. I am because this is embarrassing. I mean, I'm sweating right now, you guys. I'm sweating right now. It's 10:30 in the morning. The air conditioning is on. I am a full on mess. So you're not alone, you know, if you're going through this too. Like, congratulations. It sucks. We're in this together. Being a woman is fucking hard. And that's all I got. You know, I mean, I am oh, I do have I do have news. I do have some news. Um, I will be running the every woman's marathon in February next year, February 2027. Also, I think I will be running the London Marathon in April 2027. So that will be two marathons back to back. The good news is every woman's marathon has an eight-hour time limit. I'll probably take that real nice and slow, do a lot of walking, and not take it as like a race. Um, because London does have a stricter time limit and I would want to go for it at London. So yeah, it's exciting. I'm excited. Um I have vacation time I can use. The every women's marathon is in New Orleans. It's women. If you're if you're a runner and you're thinking about doing your first marathon, I this is a good one to do. The weather should be pretty good. It will probably be a little bit sticky humid, but it will at least be a little cool, a little bit. And I can't say it's gonna smell great, but it's all women. The vibes are gonna be high. And the goodie bags are really, really good for the every women's marathon. There's a lot of perks at that race that are not offered at other races. Um, also open registration, so you don't have to have a time limit or anything or a lottery or anything like that. You can just register. I will be there. If you want to go with me, if you want to meet up, reach out. Definitely reach out. Um, and and the best way to find me, you guys, is on Instagram. So you can find me on Instagram, high vibes experience, or Megan Beecham. They're both. I check both. So one thing that I have really been working on, just dealing with all of this change within my body and my living situation and just like everything is the importance of keeping up my running, the importance of making sure I meditate, and the importance of being clear about what I need. If I need 10 minutes of alone time, I have to say it. You know, if I need to go out for a run, I have to say it. Um, or I have to do it. And so, you know, when you are going through things like this and transitions or life is hard because your relationships are suffering or you're having hot flashes, people don't understand. Like, guys don't understand this stuff, you know? And um it's okay to just be like, hey, look, I need 10 minutes. Can I just have 10 minutes of alone time? And in case you're wondering, going to the gym, running, eating healthy, eating clean, eating whole foods, that has not helped my hot flashes one bit. Okay. Uh just want to throw that out there. Also, I'm taking a lot of supplements. They have also not helped my hot flashes at all. So I'm hoping HRT does. Uh, after I've been on HRT for a little while, I will update you and let you know how it's going. But right now I'm in the thick of it. If you're in the thick of perimenopause, welcome. Welcome to the party. And thank you so much for listening. This is Megan on the High Vibes Experience podcast.