Top 11 Things the Best 'Were Willing To Do' From the First 111 Episodes

Over the last 3 1/2 years we've asked every guest the same final question, "What have been the things you've been willing to do, that maybe others haven't, that has helped you have success up to this point?" In this episode, we recap the Top 11 themes that we've uncovered from the 81 different answers to that final question.

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Transcript

NSD - 111th Episode.txt
English (US)

00:00:01.080 — 00:04:13.010 · Speaker 1
ReliaQuest mental performance coach Derin McMains interviews top performers across multiple industries to unpack their mindset and their strategies that has helped them dominate in their arena so you can dominate in yours. Welcome to no show dogs powered by rely Quest. Hey, welcome back to the No Show Dogs podcast, Powered by ReliaQuest.

And we are 111 episodes into this thing over the past three and a half years, and we just thought now would be a good time to not only celebrate that, but more importantly, to share what we've learned. So first, quick celebratory moment and a huge virtual fist bump to you through through your headphones or your car speakers wherever you're listening to this from.

Because we just recently went over 600,000 downloads and social media views, and we really couldn't do that without you. No way. Without you making us a part of your routine to get a little better and you sharing it with others. So we first just want to say thank you. I'm telling you, man, we're just so grateful for the investment that you keep making in yourself and your own development so you can make those around you better.

Pretty cool. Now let's get to what we've learned. And look, I am juiced about this today because we're going to share with you the top 11 things that our world class guests have been willing to do that has helped them have the success they've had in their career. And if you've subscribed to the No Show Dogs podcast, or you've listened to just a few episodes, then you're very familiar with the final question that we ask every guest.

And this final question is really the ethos of no show Dogs. It's it's not about looking good, it's about being good. And our final question is, what have been the things that you've been willing to do that you think maybe others haven't, that has helped you have the success you've had up to this point? And we thought that there's really no better way to celebrate 111 episodes than to share with you the top 11 insights from the answers to that specific question.

And here's how we got to this top 11 to remove bias and increase accuracy. We put all the answers to that specific question from every one of our guests into a large language model, and prompted it to group similar ideas together, and then rank them by how frequently and powerfully they appeared across all interviews.

And as expected, it kicked out an objective top 11 list that I mean, honestly surprised me a bit, like which was the whole point, because that revealed some of my biases. And the cool thing that I realized with that was really that this podcast and and that question in particular has essentially been a three and a half year research project that I didn't know I was doing.

It's it's been a three and a half year qualitative research project, and in this time we've asked 81 guests the same question. And these guests are their coaches, their athletes, their leaders, their entrepreneurs, their their New York Times best selling authors, both male and female. They represent five different countries across 20 different sports.

They want to combine 12 World Series, nine Super Bowls, two Stanley Cups. They participated in 25 Olympic Games, bringing home 16 medals, with nine of those being gold, by the way. They've been to seven Paralympic Games, winning three World Championships. Oh, and we've sprinkled in three NFL Hall of Famers in this sample size two.

And while we're at it, we also added some elite. I'm telling you, elite leaders from four different branches of the US and British armed forces. This group of 81 is world class. But let me tell you what I really love most about our guests that we've had on the show so far. It's not just their wins, their gold medals, their championships, or even their Hall of Fame Gold jackets.

What I love is that they've lost two. Not only have they won on the biggest stages, but they failed on the biggest stages too. They've got scars. They've got embarrassing moments. They wrestle with self-doubt. They've contemplated if they really even have what it takes to keep going at the highest level.

And right alongside the praise they've received, they've received even more criticism.


00:04:14.490 — 00:08:35.430 · Speaker 1
You see, you see, what I love most about these conversations is that you're getting insight from those that are actually in the arena, those doing the work, not some leadership expert or or consultant or someone that's read a few books on high performance, know these are people that have lived it, they've experienced it, they fought through it, and they can share with us how they continue to keep pushing themselves to new levels.

So with that being said, here we go. Here are the top 11 insights on what some of the best performers in the world do just a little bit differently. That has helped them reach the top of their profession. All right. Starting with number 11. Number 11 was this. They're extremely self-aware, and they show up authentically.

They play their own game. They aren't out there trying to be somebody. They're not. They're not in the business of being a cover band. Authenticity. Isn't this performance? No, it's a discipline, you see. It's a choice and self-awareness. That's the price you gotta pay to just figure out who you authentically are, because you can't truly be authentic without knowing yourself.

And then it's being disciplined to show up that way every time. Hall of Fame coach Tony Dungy talked about this when he shared a story about interviewing for his first head coaching role, and he had a choice. Do I tell them what I think they want to hear, or do I answer as my true self? And he answered as his true self.

And he didn't get the job, which actually turned out to be a blessing because he was later hired by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. And the rest is history. And look, Dungy wasn't the only one. Many of our guests have talked about. Knowing yourself, operating authentically, getting real with themselves, and reflecting and just really leaning into their strengths.

Professional rock climber Michaela Kearse, she tells herself, climb like Michaela, which has been wisdom that she got from her mother. And Major League Baseball legend Evan Longoria, said it was about taking a really hard look internally and being honest with myself. The New York Times bestselling author Jim Murphy.

He said this, he said it's about having an accurate view of self. Look, know who you are, know what you're about, and choose to authentically show up that way every day. Play your own game. Number ten. Number ten is all about relationships, mentorship, and community. They don't go it alone. They build their team.

World class performers intentionally surround themselves with great people. They know they can't do it alone. And you can't do it alone either. You know this. Your performance is going to be a byproduct of the people around you and the people pouring into you. University of Notre Dame men's lacrosse head coach Kevin Corrigan.

He talked about how he intentionally seeks out mentorship from other coaches and other sports. He shared with us that he goes over and watches Notre Dame's football practices to study the way one of their offensive line coaches teaches their players. He's intentionally studying others outside of his arena so he can bring those lessons back into his own, Super Bowl winning coach Bruce Arians said this just last week, he said, you're not going to get there by yourself.

And author and creative catalyst Kevin Carroll. He talked about how he built a wonderful community around him because he knew he couldn't do it alone. Nobody nobody reaches elite levels alone. It's getting strength from your relationships, wisdom from mentors, and support from your community that will sustain you in your journey.

Build your team. All right. Number nine. Number nine is is about service and team first leadership. It's about putting others first and making them better. It's not about you. Look, this might seem paradoxical to some of you, but you're going to go a lot further in your career when you help others get what they want in their career.

Many leaders define their success as helping others succeed. Serving people, putting others first, and elevating teammates is the way of world class performers. World series champion, mental performance coach and Limitless Minds director of performance Josh LeFrak. He said it's about putting myself aside and putting others first and lifting others up and letting them shine.

Chicago Bears mental performance coach Andy Reese he simply put it this way. Service before self. It's about pouring into others. An NFL Hall of Famer, Derrick Brooks, he discussed using every platform and relationship to serve to make the world better.


00:08:36.469 — 00:10:30.470 · Speaker 1
The best leaders, they focus outward, not inward. Lifting others actually lifts you. It's a counterintuitive truth. That's the fastest way to advance your own career is to focus on advancing everyone else's. You can lift while you climb. In fact, that's what the best do. Put others first and make them better.

And that brings us to number eight. Here's number eight. They're obsessed with improvement toward mastery. They're chasing improvement over results. Mastery over metals. The best are consumed by improvement. They're not obsessing over results. Instead, they're obsessing over getting better.

They're chasing growth in hopes of reaching mastery in their craft. Pepperdine director of tennis Adam Ciccarelli. He said it this way obsession is pretty hard to beat. And I'm obsessed with the developmental process. And Adam and Adam was so locked in on getting better years ago, he actually stepped down from a Division one head coaching job to take on an assistant coaching role because he knew he had holes in his coaching.

That's someone that's focused on long term mastery over a short term title. The legendary University of Utah volleyball coach Beth Lanier also talked about her relentless pursuit of mastery. Or I mean, I really like how Andy McKay said it. Andy is the former Seattle Mariners assistant general manager, and now he's the field coordinator for the Cleveland Guardians.

And he said it this way. He said, I'm more concerned with closing the gap between who I am and who I can be. That's obsession and mastery. Most people obsess over and are chasing the wrong thing. They're chasing the title, the ranking, the promotion, the result. But here's what we've learned. We've learned that the ones who actually get those, they aren't chasing any of that.

They're chasing mastery. Obsess over mastery, not results.


00:10:31.630 — 00:10:58.680 · Speaker 1
All right. Number seven. Number seven is they have the courage to publicly fail, to look bad, to be rejected, and I wouldn't even say at times the the courage to look or sound stupid. And those are the words they've used. Look, many of our guests have been willing to hear no look inexperienced, ask dumb questions, or even fail publicly.

And they can do this because they're more concerned with their practice and their progress than the perception of others.


00:10:59.840 — 00:11:34.600 · Speaker 1
Rising country music star Scotty Hasting he said that he got the opportunity to play on the stages of Broadway in Nashville because getting rejected ten times didn't keep him from working and coming back and trying again. He actually said that the no's made him push harder and get better until it became a yes.

New York Times bestselling author Daniel Coyle. He told us it was his willingness to be dumb. Former Major League Baseball executive and world champion Joe Boehringer. He simply said, I'm not afraid to look stupid in the Arizona Diamondbacks head of strength and conditioning Nate Shaw. He said this I don't mind being wrong.


00:11:35.880 — 00:11:59.280 · Speaker 1
Fear of embarrassment limits more people than lack of ability. Most people don't have a fear of failure. What they actually have is a fear of what others will say about their failure. Your ego can never be bigger than your dreams because the moment it is you stop going for it. You stop reaching for support.

You stop trying the hard thing. And when you stop, you're stuck.


00:12:00.720 — 00:12:13.200 · Speaker 1
The best not only have the courage to fail, the courage to look bad, the courage to sound stupid, and the courage to be rejected. Know that they're they're willing to do it in wide open spaces for us all to see.


00:12:14.400 — 00:14:11.970 · Speaker 1
Have the courage to publicly fail. Alright. Number six, they're intentionally present. They are right where their feet are. They're deliberate in how they show up, what they're working on, and put all their focus into this present moment. This is about being intentionally present in the moment that's right in front of you.

Not worrying about yesterday, not focusing on what tomorrow might bring, or even concerning themselves with with how to get the next roll. They're locked in on the moment in front of them, because they know that if they dominate in the now, then next will find them. There's been some research that Chad McGee shared with us when he was on the show.

And and Chad's the director of meditation training at the University of Wisconsin. And he said, our minds are wondering 47% of the time. Think about that. Roughly half the time we're not paying attention to what we're doing. You want to separate yourself from the pack? Be intentionally present. UFC fighter and top contender Tatiana Suarez.

She talked about how present she is when she trains. She said, I'm very present. I don't just show up and and just say, oh, I'm going to go to practice. No, she's thinking about her foot placement, how she turns her hip in, and she's focusing on getting every rep as perfect as she can. That's full presence and full intentionality.

But let's just say you're not a fighter and you're trying to advance as a leader. Well, University of Alabama football head coach Caitlin DeBoer talked about what that looked like for him nine coaching staff before he ever got the Alabama job. He simply said this about his journey to the top. I focused on where I was at.

It wasn't about what's next. It was about what's now. Be where your feet are. Be intentional about what you're doing the best in the world. Have learned that when you let go of yesterday, you can be present and intentional today and then tomorrow will take care of itself. Make the big time where you are. Be intentionally present.


00:14:14.050 — 00:14:34.610 · Speaker 2
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Learn more at request.


00:14:37.250 — 00:15:18.330 · Speaker 1
And that brings us to our top five. Number five they push through the pain. They persevere through discomfort. They keep going. They and really, they not only embrace the discomfort, they sometimes run right towards it. There's this old maxim that's been attributed to several folks, so I don't really know who originally said it, but it goes like this.

Excellence is your capacity to endure pain. And guess what? It's true. This is what many of our guests credited their success to, was their ability to continue to persevere through discomfort and pain. It's been their response to keep moving in the face of of pain, rejection, setbacks, uncertainty, loneliness, and failure.


00:15:19.810 — 00:16:46.500 · Speaker 1
But here's the thing they really didn't label it as much as they just accepted it. And I think three time World Series champion and San Francisco Giants president of baseball operations Buster Posey said it best when he said the pain is just a part of it. Pain is a part of any meaningful journey, and the sooner you accept that, the faster you can push through it, because pain is really not the problem.

It's not. It's our desire for comfort, our desire for easy. That's what makes us hate the pain. And you're probably thinking right now, of course, baseball catchers must accept pain. But I'm not going to be a major league catcher. And look, you're probably right. You might not be, but pain is pain and discomfort is discomfort.

And and it's going to be your willingness to endure it. That will be the separator. Tampa Bay lightning mental performance coach doctor Ryan Hamilton. He talked about pain and discomfort this way in his career. He said sometimes that's being away. It's being lonely. Sometimes that's being overwhelmed with work and competing responsibilities.

Sometimes that is going without any validation that you're doing a good job for months on end. Sometimes it's it's getting critical feedback directly to your face. And then he added this, which I absolutely loved. He said this on the other side of a lot of those moments of discomfort and uncertainties.

I also find the best moments of my professional life,


00:16:47.940 — 00:17:14.900 · Speaker 1
whether it's physical pain, mental strain or emotional turmoil, the best know that they've got to keep pushing through it, accept it, get on with it. Climbs aren't designed to feel good. Push through the pain. Alright, final four, here we go. Number four. They play the long game. They delay their gratification.

They're investing in the grind of today for the payout in some distant tomorrow.


00:17:16.180 — 00:17:27.980 · Speaker 1
We all know this. We. We live in a world that's wired for instant gratification. But the things that actually move the needle in our careers and our health and and even in our relationships, they rarely arrive on demand. Nope.


00:17:29.220 — 00:18:42.820 · Speaker 1
They're just earned. They're earned in the quiet, dirty reps and the thousands of steps that nobody rewards or even half the time notices. Vanderbilt University football head coach Clark Lee simply said this. He said work for free. That's someone that's playing the long game, I'm telling you. MLB.com veteran reporter Steve Gilbert took a tiny paycheck to get the reps he needed early in his career, knowing that the payoff was going to be down the road, Florida State Hall of Fame softball coach Lonnie Almeida said this about the long game, especially when she first started as a coach.

She said, don't hunt the money, hunt the opportunities. And three time U.S. Olympic speed skater and two time bronze medalist Mia manganiello said this, she said, which, honestly, I think this puts a nice bow on this one. She said this. You got to be willing to sacrifice the moment for the ultimate goal.

That's delayed gratification, that's long term thinking. And it's the it's the habit stacking and the character building that compounds over time. That's what elevates you to the top. You got to have the discipline to focus on the now. While your expectations for a reward are set for later. It's going to take years for you to become an overnight success.

Play the long game.


00:18:44.340 — 00:20:17.030 · Speaker 1
Now, before I tell you number three, let me first say this. I thought this next one was actually going to be number one. I made my own little list just to kind of see where where it would where it would shake out. Um, but I quickly learned that really, that's my own bias at play because it's been my story. So I'm really glad that we approached this list that way, because it did remove my personal biases.

So with that being said, here's number three. They do the extra work. And this isn't just about hard work at the highest levels. Everybody works hard. This is this is extra work. They do more. When others check out, they keep going. And it's those consistent extra reps that really separates them from the pack.

The cream doesn't just rise to the top. That's untrue. The cream does the extra work to fight their way to the top. The San Francisco Giants legendary shortstop Brandon Crawford. He said that while he was in high school, every Friday night, he would go to the batting cages while his friends would go to parties.

He'd go work on his craft. John Gallagher, who's in his ninth season in the MLS, an all star in place for Austin FC. He talked specifically about watching extra video, getting the extra reps in and doing those one percenters each day, and the greatest American speedskater of all time, five time gold medalist doctor Eric Heiden.

He said this. He said, I think the thing that has set me apart from my skating peers, my cycling peers and my peers in medicine is the ability to push myself physically and mentally. I could go on and on about all of our guests that mentioned just simply doing more work than those around them, but you get it.


00:20:18.110 — 00:20:37.430 · Speaker 1
Extra levels requires extra work. You can't separate yourself from the pack by running at the packs pace. The separator isn't talent. It isn't luck. It's the extra. The extra rep, the extra hour, the extra question. But the extra isn't for show. It's not for credit, it's for building. You do the extra work.


00:20:39.070 — 00:21:11.150 · Speaker 1
And that brings us to number two. They never arrive. They never arrive. They have the humility to keep learning. They are lifelong learners. The minute you think you've arrived, you've already started falling behind. The best know that that they've got to stay a student of the game or the game will pass them by.

They ask questions, they seek feedback, admit ignorance, and evolve constantly because that's what it takes. Cleveland Guardians manager Stephen Vogt. He said, I need to keep learning because if I don't keep learning, the game is going to pass me up.


00:21:12.190 — 00:22:17.119 · Speaker 1
And how's he been doing? Well, two years at the helm. Two division titles and twice named American League Manager of the year. And this guy. Check this out. Is hunting new learnings like it's his first day on the job. Detroit Lions director of health and performance Brett Fisher. He said this it's about having the humility to constantly learn.

And Colgate's men's lacrosse head coach Matt Carrick, he simply said, I'm a learner and I'm okay with being wrong and being vulnerable. The best never arrive. The humility to learn might be considered a soft skill, but I can assure you it ain't soft. It's one of the hardest skills to develop and to keep, especially after having success.

But this, this skill, this is the skill that keeps every other skill alive, never arrive. And that brings us to number one on the list. And I'll be honest, I was slightly disappointed in it. Like I thought it was going to be this amazing thing, this complex thing, this insightful thing that I've never heard before.

And it turns out the number one thing that the best are willing to do


00:22:18.120 — 00:22:22.600 · Speaker 1
that others aren't really isn't shocking. It's actually shockingly simple.


00:22:23.760 — 00:22:25.160 · Speaker 1
So here's the number one thing.


00:22:26.560 — 00:23:01.520 · Speaker 1
They relentlessly and consistently kept showing up. That's it. It's just showing up every day, ready to go. It's doing the basic fundamentals over and over. It's staying steady over long periods of time. It's mastering the mundanity. It's choosing consistency over intensity. It's just discipline, execution over years and years and years.

Kyle Whittingham, who's now the University of Michigan head football coach, he said it's about just being the same guy every day. World champion swimmer and performance coach Seth Peper, he shared that so much about life


00:23:02.640 — 00:23:37.440 · Speaker 1
is just stick with it, just keep showing up. Denver Broncos offensive tackle Mike McGlinchey, he hired a strength coach. Think about this. He hired a strength coach while he was at his buddies wedding in the off season so he wouldn't miss one day of workouts. That's relentless consistency in showing up, and I think NFL Hall of Fame cornerback Ronde Barber probably said it best.

And mind you, he holds the record for most consecutive starts at cornerback in NFL history. And he said this. The secret is that there is no secret. You just got to put the work in.


00:23:38.720 — 00:23:51.640 · Speaker 1
Consistency compounds more than talent. Separating yourself is really the simple act of showing up again and again and again and again and again. Even if no one is cheering you on or even hardly notices,


00:23:52.680 — 00:24:04.280 · Speaker 1
you'll find the success you're looking for when you commit to the simple act of showing up every day relentlessly and consistently, keep showing up.


00:24:05.800 — 00:25:21.890 · Speaker 1
So after 111 episodes with 81 different guests, from from 20 different sports and four different branches of the US military and British armed forces. Those were the top 11 things that that they've been willing to do that others haven't. That has helped them have the success they've had in their career up to this point.

But let me tell you something. Here's the here's the best and maybe most empowering news I got for you. Each of those 11 things that were just mentioned, they are all 100% within your control, increasing your self-awareness. You can show up authentically, surrounding yourself with great people, putting others first and serving them to make them better.

Obsessing over improvement in your pursuit of mastery. Having the courage to publicly fail. Being intentionally present in this moment. Accepting discomfort so you can persevere through it. Thinking long term and choosing delayed gratification. Doing the extra work. Having the humility to keep learning, and simply showing up every day.

Every one of those are 100% within your control. You are more in control of reaching mountaintops than you think you are. This list of 11 things are all within your control. These are between you and you.


00:25:23.330 — 00:25:52.250 · Speaker 1
The question for you is, will you be willing to do the things to turn your dreams into reality? Play your game. Build your team. Put others first and make them better. Obsess over mastery, not results. Have the courage to publicly fail. Be intentionally present. Push through the pain. Play the long game.

Do the extra work. Never arrive and relentlessly and consistently keep showing up.


00:25:53.810 — 00:25:56.890 · Speaker 1
Thanks for tuning in. Now go out and make.


00:25:56.890 — 00:25:57.930 · Speaker 2
It a great today.