We Recommend: A Movie Podcast
We Recommend is a movie podcast where every week Jesse and Jason discuss a movie that they love and recommend you to watch and then come back and listen to their podcast!
We Recommend: A Movie Podcast
The Ritual (2017)
Deep in the silent Swedish forests, ancient horrors still dwell. When four friends embark on a hiking trip to honor their fallen companion, what begins as a healing journey rapidly descends into a waking nightmare that none could have anticipated.
Ready to experience one of modern folk horror's defining films? Watch The Ritual, then join our discussion about how ancient mythology continues to shape our deepest fears.
We would love to hear from you! Send us an email and maybe it will be read on the podcast! werecommendmailbag@gmail.com
To quickly follow us on social's or listen on another platform follow the link!
http://linktr.ee/werecommendpodcast
Music produced by Joey Prosser. X @mrjoeyprosser
Hello and welcome to the we Recommend podcast, a movie podcast, where every week we recommend a movie for you to watch and then come back here and listen to us discuss. I'm Jesse, I'm Jason. My old scoutmaster used to say if the shortcut was a shortcut, it wouldn't be called a shortcut, it'd be called a route, because this week we recommend the Ritual, the ritual.
Speaker 2:There's really no quotes oh god, here we go help. My mom was our. I only made it to Cub Scouts. I didn't make it past that.
Speaker 1:I was like, oh god, where's this going? Please don't so, jason the ritual. What'd you think? It, fucking rules, is going. Please don't so, jason the ritual. What'd you think?
Speaker 2:It fucking rules.
Speaker 1:I love it, I love.
Speaker 2:Eldritch Horror. It's my favorite.
Speaker 1:This folklore, shit, horror stuff. I love it, man, it's my jam.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the scary woods. Yeah, all the runes, I fucking love it, it's.
Speaker 1:You know this. Yeah, the scary woods, yeah, all the runes, I love it it's. You know this is going to be the second week I talk about my vacation, but there's a part in Florida, when we go to St George, that there's a lot of skinny trees. Yeah, just a lot of skinny trees, and it's like an hour of your drive. And I was just like, when it gets, looking in those trees on my way to vacation, like, is there a Bigfoot, is there going to be something out there? And I'm like, yeah, those trees are terrifying. Being in the woods alone is terrifying, especially at night, especially when you're with fucking weasel Dom. Oh God, talk about. Here's the thing. The thing dom reminds me of someone I know. Oh no, I won't say oh no, like I don't really talk to him anymore. It's not somebody they used to work at chelsea, but it kind of reminds me. I'm just like golly, just constantly arguing about everything. Such a little baby, debbie downer dude fucking tommy.
Speaker 2:It's like every. I gotta stop. I'm hurting, though, and like, whenever you see him, a little baby, debbie Downer. Dude fucking Tommy Downer.
Speaker 1:I gotta stop. I'm hurting, though, and like, whenever you see him a little later, you're like you know what actually? Yeah, you're fucking right. Why'd y'all go through these woods? This movie also has one of my favorite things, when you just you know the trope of these people. Why are y'all doing this? Right? Yeah, it's like I get that they want to hurry up through the woods, and you know what? They would have been correct if fucking dom didn't like I want to go down this path. They would have just went straight to the cabin that they're looking for?
Speaker 2:yeah, if they would have, well, they would have followed the compass because they're trying to get out right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, since his leg was yeah, and like they had that trail, I'm assuming, from like the creature, that creature, that guy's like I'm going this way and it's like who are you? You don't have a compass, you're just following nothing. Whew, man, he riles me up. Dude, no, I love, I don't know. There's. It's always. It's kind of eerie whenever, because you know, most folklore is fake's not like it's like. It's usually something to like scare people like wendigo. It's something native americans made up so people wouldn't eat humans, because if you it's like native american lore amazing a wendigo is someone who ate a human and turned into a monster.
Speaker 1:So it's just kind of fun to see like all these you know fake tales. And then, whenever you put them in movies, it becomes real and it's like is of fun to see like all these you know fake tales. And then, whenever you put them in movies, it becomes real and it's like is there anything scarier than when you walk into a place and all these people believe in something and it's like, oh, this is creepy. And then that shit turns out to be real. Is there anything scarier than that? It's like, ah, wow, that sucks. Wow, that sucks. How wrong I was.
Speaker 2:And what I really love about, like Norse mythology and just like the environmental horror of all. This is really great because the forest is so silent.
Speaker 1:Something they say at the beginning yeah, it's so quiet in here.
Speaker 2:And it's something that I've seen in. There's a game called Senuauous Sacrifice or something. It's kind of like this, with the eldritch like fighting and with all the charms hanging from trees. Yeah. And it's so quiet and all you hear is just charms and it's like and you can't see in a straight line because of all the trees. Yeah. And it just feels so isolated and terrifying.
Speaker 1:And then it's like with those little trees when you move, like there's so many of the little trees that like it kind of simulates someone walking. Yes, so it's like if you catch out of the corner of your eye, especially if you were to wear glasses. You know glares and stuff like a lot of time. I'm just sitting at home. I'm like, why did? I was my frames, so I couldn't even imagine being being like with my thicker frames in the forest with those tiny trees, I'll be like can we go no also it's just, oh man, just talk about people walking and not just seeing all the warning signs and not turning around.
Speaker 2:Did you ever watch the show Vikings?
Speaker 1:No, I haven't. I know you've brought it up before, oh, okay, well, it's Not on the pod, I think, just like in real life. Oh, all right.
Speaker 2:There's a couple of episodes where they all go into the woods, into like this type of forest to go to like a it's like a huge gathering of everyone just, or like worship odin or some shit, and it's like a lot of human sacrifices and like it's just the quiet, like like just gutting people hanging them upside down yeah, it's so good.
Speaker 1:that's what I liked about, uh, the northman. Yeah, that was like fun to see, like especially because that so good, that's what I liked about the Northmen. Yeah, that was like fun to see, especially because that director really likes historical, like fact. He likes to put facts in his movies like how they use their weapons, how they raided places. It's like really cool to see all that.
Speaker 2:I think modern religion could really learn something from these guys.
Speaker 1:Yeah, most modern religion is so boring. It's like oh, everybody was perfect and happy, this was the most perfect human being. Like Greek and Norse is like they fucked all the time Everybody had sex. That's all they were doing.
Speaker 2:And they really scared you and they love to murder. We got so many people, we could just sacrifice them.
Speaker 1:It's like you accidentally trip over them, they'll kill your whole family. It's like Zeus brother, chill out, boy. Why are you so upset? You got everything. You're a god. Speaking of gods, let's go into a little bit about what this movie's referencing and stuff. So there's something called the Kirby Kirkby, kirkby, kirby, steppenstone, so the. Whenever he, luke, first gets kidnapped and like they're seeing, like these people kind of like pray whenever they fall. Dom and Luke fall into the house. Yeah, like, towards the end you see people praying to something. It's that stone, oh, nice. So the woman is praying to which is the stone, or it's also called a Loki stone. So it's housed in Stephen's church in Kirkby Stephen in Britain. The stone is thought to depict the Norse god, loki, bound and chained so and turns out the Jotun, which is the creature. In fact, this creature also has its roots in Norse mythology. This mystic, enigmatic beasts are similar to trolls and giants, and it turns out to be the bastard son of Loki.
Speaker 1:Fuck, yeah, so that's why it also has that kind of trickster element of like whenever gail comes out, see illusions yeah, so he sees gail, which when I learned that, I was like oh, this thing isn't good and giving you like one last happy thing.
Speaker 2:It's just like a little shithead and he is and I, and if, if, if, loki would have brought this shit out whenever he was captured by Iron man yeah they wouldn't have had a chance. Yeah, I don't know. Thor could have probably kicked its ass yeah, well, yeah, hopefully but you know.
Speaker 1:Loki's very tricky, tricky, tricky, so let's see. So like the methods of killing. Well, yeah, hopefully. But you know, loki's very tricky, tricky, tricky, so let's see. So like the methods of killing. The god Odin, who is associated with the knowledge and wisdom, sacrificed himself in the cosmic tree, yorg, still by impaling himself on a spear. Yggdrasil, right, yeah, yggdrasil, yeah, you know, I don't know any of these words. Through this self-sacrifice, he was able to gain knowledge of rune magic. The symbolism could play into the ritual of the film's title. At the end of the film, the villagers plan to offer Luke up to the beast who they all worship as a god. If he lays down and prays before Jotun, the monster will take his pain away and reward him with everlasting life, but if he doesn't, he'll join his friends up in the trees so is that like hanging him up?
Speaker 2:impaling them on trees is kind of like a bastardized version of what Odin because Odin hung himself.
Speaker 1:Well, he like stabbed himself with a spear, I guess. Well, he that's what this was saying. I might be wrong though.
Speaker 2:Well, I always heard that he hung himself in a tree and then, like the truth, the Yggdrasil, and then crows pecked his eyes out like ravens or whatever.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:Blinded him, and then he could have stabbed himself.
Speaker 1:I mean why not Maybe a little bit of all three. He's like I really got to die here.
Speaker 2:And then he rose after the whatever day and was a god. Yeah, it's badass, love it.
Speaker 1:So a little bit of fun about the rune, the Odal rune, which is kind of the circle one that means inherited estate or also could mean descent, so like, whenever you see some of the like the circular runes, I guess that means, hey, our fucking land dude. And then you have the Algiz rune.
Speaker 2:Sure, if I'm saying that right which is the letter you have, the.
Speaker 1:Algiz rune Sure. If I'm saying that right, which is the letter Y, it's translated as elk, so it's kind of an elk like creature Makes sense.
Speaker 2:Fucking horrifying. With the big long legs. It's been blend in perfectly with all trees and all the little mummified humans.
Speaker 1:Is that the? Is that the?
Speaker 2:extended life that they're getting.
Speaker 1:Yes, it is. It's not good mummified humans up top. Is that the?
Speaker 2:extended life that they're getting. Yes, yes, it is. It's not good. That was awesome.
Speaker 1:He's like fuck these guys. Yeah, it's like y'all can't like this right.
Speaker 2:This is not good.
Speaker 1:This is not what y'all were promised. I'm sure they're chanting the word Bluetooth. I don't know how you'd say it in Norse, but it's B-L-O-T. With the little dash over the O it means sacrifice. So that's what they're chanting sacrifice, cool man, that's really kind of. All the facts there's like nothing except it's just all the mythology which I butchered.
Speaker 2:I like it when movies don't over explain things.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And I feel like this movie did that.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Kind of let your imagination go with it.
Speaker 1:So one of the things I wanted to ask do you think so? You know this came out in 2017, I believe, yeah, and no one heard about it. Well, it was like really popular as soon as it came out. And then it's just because it came out on Netflix and it came out one month, everybody's like, oh, it's out of my head, also used to be a book, it was a book before.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, I saw that it was based on a book the same name you know this came out during the whole.
Speaker 1:Trauma has to be in every horror. It's like, how do you feel like the trauma of this played into the movie? Do you think it was effective?
Speaker 2:It was it's kind of like it reminded me a lot of the Frankenstein monster, how it just kind of follows you around, but until it literally started attacking them I was like, oh wait, no it's totally something different, but it seemed like his trauma was following him wherever he went. Yeah, and the monster used it against him.
Speaker 1:Yeah, fuck, following him wherever he went. Yeah, and the monster used it against them. Yeah, I think that's what really works. In this, as in like some of the other. It's always just oh, it's something they're dealing with. It really has nothing that much to do with what's trying to kill them, but in this, this little loki bats or sons, it's like I'm gonna have a field day with this guy. I'm your wife. Yeah, man, those transitions whenever it's just like Now you're in this store where you're going to constantly keep seeing your friend die, and how it's like like there's less and less of the store as it continues and it's blending in with the environment.
Speaker 2:Sorry, I had turkey sausage.
Speaker 1:And now I'm like hell of a burnt belchy.
Speaker 2:Well, I think most of like the do you have any favorite folk horror movies? I haven't really thought about it. You know it's like, there's always like, Like.
Speaker 1:The Witch, or like this one's one of them now.
Speaker 2:Pretty good, yeah, it's fucking cool.
Speaker 1:I think probably the two most known and probably best would be the original Wicker man. Have you seen that? Not the original one? Oh man, the original one's great Way better than Nick Caveman, which is considered a bad movie. Fun to watch, but it's really not even that, although I enjoyed it when I saw it. Really. Yeah, when I was a kid I did enjoy it, but now when I watched it a little older, I was like this is kind of really boring.
Speaker 2:Midsommar was fucking good.
Speaker 1:Midsommar's fucking metal baby. It happens all during the daytime. It's so good. So yeah, like Wicker man, midsommar, blair Witch, that one's great, that was great.
Speaker 2:Hereditary, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:Fuck yeah, that was hereditary. Oh yeah, fuck yeah, there's one called the kill list. I don't know if you watched it. I don't think so. Uh, you should. It's a very it's an awesome movie. And here's the thing you can't understand. They're all speaking well, it's I don't know where if it takes place in wales or something, they're speaking english, but it's so hard to hear them because their accents. You have to turn on the subtitles. A Field in England, that was a fun one. And if you want to watch some old ones, there's like Onibaba, which is like a.
Speaker 1:Japanese film.
Speaker 2:Oh, it's so good, doesn't that, onibaba?
Speaker 1:it's like Boogeyman yeah essentially it's about like two people having sex and then this badness happens and it's like all filmed like in Japan, you know, like when they didn't have like TVs and electricity and stuff, and it's so creepy because of how old it is and how over the top like sometimes Japanese cinema can be yes, and it's just like ah it was like really kind of scary, all right.
Speaker 1:Well, I think most of the things I want to talk about is actually in the plot in the movie, so I think we should just hop right in. Yeah, so think about the point of the movie as we go through the plot, because we'll be discussing it after we go through the plot. All right, the Ritual 2017. You have five old friends from university. You got rather go to Las Vegas. I don't know, vegas is really not my thing accompanies him, so would you want to go on a hiking trip in sweden? Yeah, I think so. Would you rather go to las?
Speaker 2:vegas? I don't.
Speaker 1:Vegas is really not my thing, I've never been, I think I would probably choose.
Speaker 2:I've never been either, but I don't know, I don't really seem like, though I mean like hiking in sweden.
Speaker 1:That does sound fun. But man camping, I don't know. I've I've been camping in a tent in a coon's age, just like a coon's age, like I mean, at least since I was in high school. So I'm like I don't want to be in charge of this trip going and you have to learn how to read a map and a compass. I don't think I could do it I don't trust it.
Speaker 1:Um so, while conversing in the shop, the pair notices the stressed cashier slumped against the wall behind the register. Two armed robbers emerge from the back room and Luke hides behind a shelf at the end of the aisle, leaving Rob frozen in fear. Robbers antagonize Rob, demanding his wallet, watch and ring. Rob parts with the first two willingly, but refused to give his ring as it is his wedding band. And then Luke, still hidden from sight, sight, flips the bottle in his hands, preparing to like I'm gonna do this. However, he's too slow to act and Rob gets a bloodie. He freezes.
Speaker 2:That's a horrible feeling. It's happened to me before Not this situation, but like in elementary school. I was just sitting there and then all of a sudden a fight broke out next to me and the kid got his ass completely beat like horribly, horribly blood everywhere, and I was just like feet away watching it, could not move. Until I looked around, everybody else was back against the back wall of the room. Yeah. And. I was just sitting there at my desk like frozen in fear.
Speaker 1:Man, it was horrible, golly. I've never seen an elementary school fight that violent it was bad so scary, yeah I mean, and which we'll get to it a little bit later. But yeah, man, that it's easy to say I would act. But are you sure?
Speaker 2:yeah, you never know, are you sure you're gonna act? But what would be cool if he did act Surrounded by things in the throat?
Speaker 1:I know that is the thing it's like man, if they both just grabbed bottles together and just started hucking, I mean, you figure those people would eventually be like we got to run and get out of here. So, you just need a plan before you go into any building ever. Hey, if they don't have guns, we huck bottles. But yeah, what a pretty violent death.
Speaker 2:Then I'll just have to say rob bro, give up your fucking ring and just buy a new ring.
Speaker 1:Yes for sure, it's a symbol doesn't have to mean everything, though. You still have your love between you and your wife. Just take the ring off, give it. That's why you don't get gold rings anymore. You get wooden rings that look badass, yeah, um. So then we Jump cut To Rob sleeping. I will say this opening, like the whole beginning To this Fucking tense. It's great, it's a great way To start off in your movie. Yeah, hella violent.
Speaker 1:Yeah, cause you're gonna go like 30 to 40 minutes With no violence and like you hear the Crackling, it cracks his face open yeah, and then it's like they hit him once and it's like then you hear the other robber that did a metal baton yeah, and the other robber that was like hey, why'd you don't do that?
Speaker 2:he's like that's crazy for us. Then he does it again.
Speaker 1:It's like what the fuck are you doing all of a sudden? You just had to hit him once. You didn't have to like kill him, let's just get some vodka. It's like once you hit somebody with a metal pole once and they fall to the ground. Hey, you don't have to keep doing it. Kick them in the stomach if you resist, or something, I don't know. You hit me over the head with a metal pole once, like just take my clothes take everything, take it all, take the store.
Speaker 1:You want my wife. So yeah, we jump, cut to Rob sleeping. To honor Rob's wish, the four embark on a three-day hiking trip along Kongsleden, or King's Trail, which is what I'm going to call it, in a national park in northern Sweden. Six months after his death, they stop and set up a memorial on a hill and drink for Rob and pour one out for him For the homies RIP baby.
Speaker 2:I feel like they probably should have drank more of it because it took a long time.
Speaker 1:It was a pretty funny moment where it seemed like people were kind of like wait, we could have had more.
Speaker 2:He would have wanted us to have more.
Speaker 1:He would have probably wanted you to only pour like half out. I don't think you're supposed to pour the whole. Yeah, man, you know what? That's what I want. Everybody that's listening to this, that's my friend. If I die, you'll have to go to Sweden and pour out all your alcohol so, but something real shitty and cheap.
Speaker 1:yeah, just like just a five dollar. Five dollar wine or something. Didn't have to be liquor, some schnapps. So Luke and Hutch have a talk at night. Luke blames himself for the death of Rob, hutch tells him not to blame himself, though. Then Hutch sees the lodge they are walking to, it's like, oh hey, fuck, that's where we're going, that's our way out, oh, I didn't know they were going toward a lodge. Yeah, well, they're just trying to walk out of there.
Speaker 2:I guess, oh, okay.
Speaker 1:They just saw them. They go to the lodge and I guess they're going to get picked up from there. It doesn't fully explain, but they point to it. It's like, hey, it's only two days away, goddamn. So the next morning it's raining, no. And then the fucking weasel-ass bitch Dom loses his footing and injures his knee, impairing his ability to to walk. Hutch consults the map and decides that an alternate route through a forest of the trail will take them half the time. Hey, dom, that's kind of how I always describe him before I talk about him Fucking. He's the last bitch Dom. I hate him. He sucks.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he does, he crosses the line.
Speaker 1:We'll get there. We'll get there where I can yell about him a little bit more. Hey guys, if you're hiking and you're on a trail and it's a very, you know like there's a route, all you gotta do is follow that route. You're gonna be home safe. Don't cut through the fucking woods, just don't do it. There's no reason. You're not mountain men anymore. We don't have those people, unless you are those, that person that knows how to do that.
Speaker 2:It seemed like he may have had even known.
Speaker 1:Yeah, he would have been right. The compass and the map but it's just you've got too many people with you. You got an injured guy you don't know how and because you're saying it's a shortcut if it doesn't lead you out of there in a couple hours, the guy with a hurt leg that's a weasel ass bitch he's gonna complain.
Speaker 1:Hey, you're good, you're going up and down like yeah, not trail you've just been better just to follow the trail, but it makes for a great movie. Yeah, so, and honestly, like, as soon as they go in the forest, I'm like yay they're all gonna die, but yeah, I mean because I just be like there's gonna be bears, or like there's gonna be bears or something there's gonna be all sorts of things apparently they're.
Speaker 1:I was looking it up, apparently they're forced pretty safe, nice. I mean, you know, if you see a wild animal they could attack territorial giant eldritch monster, yeah, but I mean, you know if you like, run into like a buck or something that's territorial. You could die, I mean, what about? A buck fifty the longness. Good thing. Oh wait, three, fifty not a buck. Fifty Three, fifty, oh my God. So they're walking to the forest and then they see a hippie van.
Speaker 2:That's how you rescue your dad. Joke Like that's not where you park that.
Speaker 1:And then one of them's like I got see a hippie van. That's how you rescue, that's not where you park that. And then one of them's like I got a hand job in one of those. It's like, oh man, memories. Who's like? How far away from civilization are they? And how did this hippie van get there? Did the? It was the magic, did the monster? Just like? I'm actually gonna step out of the forest today, go to the road, pick it up I want this.
Speaker 2:It's like playing with other ones this is, is my car now?
Speaker 1:Vroom vroom, vroom, cross cross. So upon entering the forest, they take a selfie. We're just four twats in a forest. Take this selfie, luke's not even smiling, phil closes his eyes and then you got Dom and Hutch the only ones that are actually smiling. Gotta go hard. Then the group start encountering strange phenomena, including a gutted elk hanging from a tree branches and strange symbols carved on the tree. Turn around, don't keep going. Oh god, please stop.
Speaker 2:I bet it was a bear that did that don't keep going.
Speaker 1:This would make no sense. Turn around. This is weird. Like all as soon as I all anytime something bad was happening, I was sitting next to my wife watching like, oh God, don't keep going, please stop.
Speaker 2:It's like those billboards with the cows that say eat more chicken or Chick-fil-A.
Speaker 1:Yeah, If you're a chicken and you see that you got to turn around man, it is one of those things it's frustrating in all horror movies where it's like what are you doing? You don't just see that and you keep going and nope, like though it's nice that there is like someone who's like we gotta turn around, like Luke being well, we should probably not keep going right, this is bad. We can't stay here.
Speaker 2:We should we should go back to the trail or at least like poke it with a stick. Yeah.
Speaker 1:But then Luke's like hey, do y'all see that? Like what that's fresh.
Speaker 2:We got to get out of here.
Speaker 1:It's like man, it's like it just sucks that everybody in horror movies have never seen a horror movie. Yeah, it's like come on, guys, if that's up there, there's at least going to be some probably some weird people at most at least in the forest, somebody that's going to do that?
Speaker 2:I don't think, I don't know what animals can do that. It tripped, yeah, oh, no, it just flew into the air.
Speaker 1:It could have been just really angry trees man. They hated that elk.
Speaker 2:We never we didn't see the sequence of events that made this accident happen.
Speaker 1:It's like Mr Magoo shit, they got it really wrong, got hit by that bus. It's a really blind elk.
Speaker 2:Have you ever hit a deer? And it gets launched into the air.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:Like into the power lines.
Speaker 1:Well, I guess I was in a car with a friend, but it didn't really launch it. It did see it spin to the side, which I was like. Oh, but then it was still alive 1080 and you could just hear like and it kind of flew in the cornfield and you could just hear it for like five minutes, running through the cornfield and falling.
Speaker 1:Oh that sucks and I was like, yeah, I'll never be a hunter, that's for sure. So as the night falls, a torrential rainstorm soaks them in. While looking for shelter, they come upon an abandoned cabin and tree with runes carved in it and decide to break in and stay overnight. Luke hears an animalistic noise outside. Try to warn the guys like hey, that's weird, right? Hey guys, we should probably not be here. Here's the thing. And then this is the one thing I'm like yeah, fuck, yeah, get in this cabin, right, it's like no one's living out here.
Speaker 1:This look pretty abandoned from the outside. It's like no, I totally on like Kutch's side of let's get in here. We can't stay out here. You're not going to pitch your tent out in that rain. It's like too crazy.
Speaker 2:I don't know, Once you see the big, the scary wicker man, that's whenever you're like if there was no wicker man, the headless, a little badass statue.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Like if there was not. If that wasn't in there, I'd be like yeah, but that's when you're like no, I think we should just turn around.
Speaker 1:The tents are rain proof yeah but I think you know, if they stayed in the tent they probably got eaten anyways. I feel like maybe there is an aspect of protection, maybe because they were with the little uh, what would you call that? Um, um, effigy? That's what I'm thinking of. Maybe he didn't want to destroy the effigy, so he wouldn't just come in there and knock the whole house down, versus he'd probably just rip them out of tins, maybe yeah, he would've probably still would've decorated with their bodies at least one person would've been caught.
Speaker 1:But yeah, this is where things start getting fucking awesome. Inside the cabin, they find necklaces hanging from the walls that depict similar symbols as the runes carved in the tree. While exploring the second floor, phil discovers a strange wooden effigy that is shaped like a decapitated human torso with antlers for hands. Yeah. Dear God, please turn around and go back. Please stop. You have to get out of this forest. Don't stay any longer.
Speaker 2:Let's just close this door and sleep downstairs, it'll be fine.
Speaker 1:Yeah, just run. So during the night the four are plagued by nightmares. We only see Luke's dream. The lightning from outside of the cabin turns into blinding light on Luke. When he goes outside the cabin he is inside the liquor store where Rob was killed. The ground is still the forest, but the rest of the store. Then he acts as if he has been stabbed and then then the walls push out and he's awake in the woods Fucking wild. That's when I was like this movie is actually probably just going to be good all the way through.
Speaker 2:It's got holes in his chest.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it's just like what. This is awesome. It's just. This movie is beautiful, right? Yeah, it really is. It's man, I don't know. Just like the set design is so great.
Speaker 1:And you know, whenever I was talking about leading up to this how good this director is with like architectural horror, which is, if this is a thing. It's a scary old house, yeah, scary woods, like the Night House, which is the next movie he did after this, which I think is a little bit better than this movie. It's also kind of folk horror-esque type of supernatural things. It's like house and woods. But the things he does with the house in that movie, where it feels like a living organism almost, which is kind of what I don't know the woods are alive and it brings in the liquor store and it just looks so cool and the fluorescent lights on the liquor store and it just like feels it just looks so cool and the fluorescent lights on like the ground looks so rad and I never thought I wanted to see that and I'm so glad I've seen it multiple times now. But yeah, just a great little sequence. It's very disorienting and it's like what is this about? Right?
Speaker 2:Is there just is it just?
Speaker 1:isn't it just a creature? But then it's like which? We don't know yet if you watch it for the first time. But it's like what is this? Is this a weird dream? It's fun that you find out later. It's this little monster, silly little monster. This monster is silly Come on monster. So everybody's waking up now. The next morning, luke finds that he has sustained a set of strange puncture wounds on his chest. Hutch is screaming and he wet himself. Damn dude. That's embarrassing as hell.
Speaker 1:He made it out of it and, like nothing weird happened the rest of the time. Everybody like Hutch. You remember that time you pissed yourself. Oh God, that was hilarious.
Speaker 2:It was a baby. Maybe he just drank too much water, yeah.
Speaker 1:We watched Superbad recently and there's this part where, like Dave Franco's in it and like it's like this part where shit, I forgot his name, but Jonah Hill's character he's like on the soccer field talking to Michael Cera and Dave Franco's like hey, get out of here, jonah Hill. He's like, hey, why don't you go wet yourself again? He's like I was in the fourth grade. It's like no one forgets.
Speaker 2:It's like that's exactly what happens and that's the horror that the monster brings up to him every time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's like oh no, I'll always have this dream of peeing myself. And then Dom is leaned up against the wall outside his sleeping bag crying for his wife Gail. Luke finds Phil in the attic naked and kneeling in prayer in front of the effigy man. That would be the wild one. Just why am I naked?
Speaker 2:I was. I was with him whenever he was so upset about it. He's like what the fuck happened to me? Yeah, that was.
Speaker 1:It's like hey, I didn't do this. I don't sleepwalk, I don't pray to effigies and I didn't take my clothes off and walk up there while I was awake and everybody's like. I don't want to talk about it. And I'm like guys, why was I doing that? It's just.
Speaker 2:So you make Xanax with alcohol?
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's what I like about feels character. Feels characters like I'm actually genuinely worried guys, I don't know what's going on here. Then it's nice that, like, luke has gas lights them. Yeah, it's like, oh, we, we don't want to think about stuff like that, I'm like what are the odds?
Speaker 1:four people have a nightmare the same night, to the point where you're gonna pee yourself. You leaned up on a corner crying when you were laying next to all four three of your other friends in your sleeping bag. Now you're out and like crying to your wife and there's a guy upstairs oh embarrassing, but Luke doesn't tell him. Hey guys, this happened to me last night.
Speaker 2:Do you think they all noticed the blood stains on his shirt?
Speaker 1:only Phil noticed it at first and it's like, yeah, and I woke up in the middle of a forest, so that's two really weird ones. And you guys also had nightmares. So like what are we doing here, guys? But the group leaves the cabin and continue to travel deeper in the woods like a bunch of smarty pants, Deeper and deeper. They're trying to find their way out. As they exit the cabin there are even more runes on the trees. Jesus, please don't keep going.
Speaker 1:Stop, the runes are pointing this way, it's like hey wait, is that a giant monster with his mouth open? Let's just walk straight in.
Speaker 2:There's an arrow in the store like the lights of the sun. It's like pointing Sudden death. Here there's a trap set up by Wile E.
Speaker 1:Coyote Just a pack of wolves licking their lips. So Dom sees a path of broken tree branches and yells that he is tired and just wants to get out. Fucking, just kill Dom. I'd be like they're like stop, let him go. I'd just be like you know what. I'm just going to try my best to walk out of here and follow a trail out. I'm not doing this with you guys.
Speaker 1:If Dom wants to go that way and die, he can. So instead of arguing with him, they just follow God. You cannot let your dick-headed friends control your life. Okay, just don't do it. If someone is being ignorant because they're hurt, just be like. If you want to go by yourself, you can. We're going this way, you can follow us, or you can die out there alone with no compass.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I did like how Hutch he's like I'm going to have to pull rank.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, it's like you should of the compass and you have the map. Yeah, oh fun. So. So phil wants to talk about what happened, but hutch and dom don't want to talk about it. Luke is curious as well. Hutch shuts them up, uh, calling it bullshit, ghost stories, and they continue forward as we hear the noises of the creature we're getting out of. Yeah, it's like oh, I just really had to pee, guys, it was raining. A lot of noises outside rolled over in a puddle yeah, I was just screaming because it hurts when I pee.
Speaker 1:So they start seeing what looks to be man-made trees cut down and another cabin, but they still keep pushing forward.
Speaker 2:Those little tree torches are cool. Yeah, those are rad I didn't know that was a thing. I wonder if that's real, if that's something that they see, I don't know.
Speaker 1:I mean it feels real right.
Speaker 2:That's really cool, Because I've seen people make those like superheated, like campfires out of tree stumps and like they just burn super hot and they burn forever.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so like that's gnarly, that's what I need to do with my tree stump in the backyard, just build a fire pit around it. Oh, did you see that?
Speaker 2:guy who did that in the middle of a city. He's trying to burn out a stump and it burned for months.
Speaker 1:Really and it never went out. Maybe I won't burn my tree stump.
Speaker 2:Oh the fire went underground and the smoke was coming out of the ground.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's a rat as hell, though, just bring people over during Halloween. It's just the devil, accidentally set the world it's like dang it.
Speaker 1:I burned China, so there's pushing forward, but bitch ass, Dom needs to rest and Phil has had, has bad boots. His feet hurts it constantly is like these are the wrong boots. I picked bad boots and a pump upon climbing a ridge in order to gain some perspective regarding their location. Luke sees different kinds of trees in the woods. It's very quiet and he's like really pissed off. He's like fuck, and then he's like the camera's slowly zooming in and it was fun the first time. I watched this.
Speaker 1:So even the first time I was watching it with my wife, when it first came out on Netflix in like 2017 or 18, you know, because it was the forest I was like there's gotta be shit in these woods, right, because it's the woods. Yeah, there's shit in the woods, you know. But you know, I was constantly kind of looking for things. I remember specifically this scene, the first. Then I was like it's not moving, I can't really tell. And then you just like, kind of the side of my eye, I see the hand move. I'm like let's fucking go. This movie is going to be like making me paranoid by looking everywhere.
Speaker 2:It's so cool. I love it. It kind of makes you connect with the way people may have looked at before us back then and like how these mythologies could have ever came to be Started right, yeah, Just like paranoia and woods when you're alone.
Speaker 1:It's terrifying and I do love like before he goes up there. They're kind of having this argument Cause they're like hey Dom, we gotta go. Okay, we can't just keep sitting here, we gotta get out of here for night time. But he's got an owie and then Luke's like fuck this.
Speaker 2:I'm going up there.
Speaker 1:I'll be right back, um, but yeah, it's great, and so, apparently, throughout this film you can see the eyes of the creature, cause, you know, it's like very piercing eyes. It's a lot like, um, you know what? Was it midnight mass or midnight mass? That Netflix show yeah, you know how they had the eyes. Yeah, like the vampires had the eyes. It was really great. Very similar to the eyes in this creature, which is what I really like, but apparently you can see the eyes in the forest throughout the film.
Speaker 2:But that's what everyone was saying I thought maybe I could sometimes, but then I was like maybe I didn't. I was like I was looking hard for stuff in the background.
Speaker 1:God damn. But it's a beautiful reveal. It makes the rest of this movie even like more amped up, because you're constantly trying to look for the horror and then, whenever, if you don't see it, and then you see it move, it's like damn it, it would have killed me if I was out there, but yeah.
Speaker 2:So he sees the hand wrapped around the trunk of a distance and it was very high up. I didn't see the hand, oh, you didn't. I saw a little bit of movement and then the camera went away so good.
Speaker 1:So, while trying to discuss his findings with the group, dom is doubtful of his report, and argument ensues wherein Dom reveals that he blames Luke for Rob's death and calls Luke cowardly for failing to act during the robbery. So Luke punches Dom like he deserves. Here's just, you know. I didn't really like Dom's character because he's a weasley ass bitch. Right, he's just one of those guys who's going to complain, make everything harder for everybody, even though it's already a hard situation. We should just like buck up and just try to get out of this damn forest, though I do understand his knee does look pretty bad, yeah, but it's like do you want to die in these woods? We need to go um. But dom wouldn't have done anything right. At most he probably would have frozen like rob and just stood there and also also got hit, yeah right, it's the classic.
Speaker 1:It's like if was there, I would have done this and this.
Speaker 2:Oh, I hate that shit.
Speaker 1:Yeah, because when I got mugged, everybody's told me what they would have probably done in that situation I was like no, you would have gotten shot yeah. Because the person had a gun, yeah, and you would have caught it. Threw the bullet back at him. It's like it makes me hate Don, and when he got punched I was like hell, yeah, yeah, what are you gonna do now? Oh, you're not doing anything like you would have done in the liquor store the second best punch in the movie.
Speaker 2:Yeah, cause? Yeah?
Speaker 1:I love what old people get in the movies funny when they deserve it, when they deserve it. It's very, which is funny because it's very reminiscent of the. Well, we'll wait till we get there. I'll make sure to bring up Nick Cage's Wicker man, but, yeah, very satisfying when Dom gets punched in the face.
Speaker 2:He's like oh, you broke my nose, it's not even broken, shut up.
Speaker 1:And then what really sucks is whenever he goes and they talk, he talks to Hutch like Luke does and he's like Luke's like Hutch. I mean you don't blame me, do you? And he's like I don't know.
Speaker 2:It's like what would?
Speaker 1:y'all done right. You had two people with weapons and you had nothing except for bottles around them, which maybe is surrounded by. But it sucks for luke, because I mean, like you never know how you're gonna react in a situation like that.
Speaker 3:You could tense up and you could both be dead and you can think about it forever, yeah yeah.
Speaker 1:So oh, dom Dom. Yeah, he looks like a hero, doesn't?
Speaker 2:he what if he was gonna throw something but he couldn't figure out which vintage?
Speaker 1:yeah, man, I really wanted to buy this, though I can't. I can't ruin this, I gotta save these. I really like this one. Wait, is this? He looks over in the wall. You break it. You buy it. It's like damn sorry, can't do it, guys. All right. So as they continue, they find a buried tent and see a wallet that has a date from 1984. Please just turn around, just get out of this forest, come on, guys. So they stop for the night. Dom's knee is swollen and Phil's feet are killing him. Hutch tells Luke that he should go out ahead of them in the morning to get help, while Hutch stays with the gang. Then Luke hears more noises from the woods.
Speaker 2:There was a part after, when they found this tent and all this stuff, they're like who would just leave all their shoes and all this stuff here? And you know, and the next scene is they're all taking off their shoes.
Speaker 1:In their tents.
Speaker 2:I was like God damn it.
Speaker 1:I don't know, guys, maybe they were attacked. Keep going.
Speaker 2:Keep going, keep going a little further.
Speaker 1:Maybe there was Elks up in the trees and they were being stalked by something and the kids were probably seeing something and the dad was like no, you guys are just. We told some ghost stories, y'all are just scared. We'll just keep pushing on. Come on guys, come on guys. So yeah, and then it's later that night. Luke is in his tent and he hears noises from creatures around him. He peeks out of his tent and sees the store again and Rob getting hit and the killer this time calling him a coward, and it wasn't a him, it was like him killing, I thought it was.
Speaker 2:I thought it was, it was it was the robber guy, but it turns into him oh did it. And like he's leaning because you know he thinks it's his fault yeah, it's his fault.
Speaker 1:yeah man, I didn't even notice that was him. Holy shit, jason, thanks bro Now next time we watch it we're not on it, but yeah. Then after he sees that, he ducks back into his tent and hides. Then Luke snaps out of his nightmare by screams, discovering that Hutch's tent is empty. Three rush deeper into the woods following Hutch's screams.
Speaker 2:Awesome, the tent gets snatched up in the air yeah. That was sweet. That's so good, it reminded me of Hereditary. Yeah, a little bit.
Speaker 1:And it's great, because we still don't know how tall this creature is. We assumed it's tall but since we saw a human hand, it's like, well, it's probably just a human right. Then, yeah, so by dawn they realize they have come lost and cannot recall where the campsite was, because they're like, hey, luke, we got to stop running, we're not going to be able to find our stuff. And then next time it cuts to them they're like walking in the daylight Like they have none of their stuff.
Speaker 2:They just waited the night, through the night. Yeah well, I think they tried to find it.
Speaker 1:And then they just kind of sat and was like shit we're fucked. It's like all they had with them at this point. But then by dawn they realize they've become lost. They decide to continue the search without their tents and supplies. Three come upon Hutch, impaled on three on tree branches, much like the gutted deer they found earlier. The group retrieves Hutch's body for his compass and knife and then give him an impromptu burial by covering his body with tree branches.
Speaker 1:Great little scene, because they're just walking and they're like and they're like oh God, if only there was signs that this could potentially happen to us. But this is the first time we're seeing anything impaled on a tree.
Speaker 2:No, way it would have ever happened to us.
Speaker 1:Maybe you guys should have I don't know turned around, not gone further into the forest, and maybe saw the one warning sign and immediately turned around and just walked to to normal, safely out of the place. I don't know. Guys, Immediately go back the way you came.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Out of the question Almost immediately as you entered the forest right. So you know, because you only walked probably like 30 minutes into the forest and saw a dead elk.
Speaker 2:I don't know, man, you know there were no signs.
Speaker 1:I mean, I guess not. If only they could.
Speaker 2:If they could read runes?
Speaker 1:Yeah, if they read runes, they'd be like oh, that says my property, okay, well, let's just continue. So they continue on and they are starting to lose it. Dom thinks it's Swedish hillbillies, yeah, and then I just think that's Swedish chef.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Hurdy, hurdy, hurdy. The sweetest chef. Yeah, Hardy, hardy, hard. Oh squeal like a pig that went like Scottish for a second Okay, okay, okay, Okay, okay.
Speaker 1:I love Luke's got this one line. There are three of us in one of it and I got a fucking knife. Oh yeah, it's like, yeah, but you already know it's big, right. It's picking things up and putting them in trees. It's either a giant monster or a bunch of hillbillies, right? Then we have like a slow pan out of the woods and it's nothing but woods around them. Yeah, Eee, scary. So they stop to drink some nasty water and notice a pot and footsteps on the ground, Straight diarrhea. Yeah, feels like are we going to follow this? And they're like nah, dog, and they're going to continue. Now they're going southwest, I'm assuming, or they're still just following the yeah, they're trying to go southwest.
Speaker 1:As they walk, we see something big moving in the background.
Speaker 1:This is where we see them walking and it's zooming in. You're like, all right, is he going to be like hand wrapped around a tree again? There's this perfect little sliver in the middle of the frame and then, as they're kind of walking out of frame, you just see it in the background, kind of walk off and it's like, oh wait, that's a big thing, that was a big thing. It's tall. So, yeah, they reach a top of a ridge. Dom and Phil are exhausted. Luke leaves Phil and Dom on the lower top of a ridge. Dom and Phil are exhausted. Luke leaves Phil and Dom on the lower part of a ridge, climbing a hill that provides an overview of the entire forest. He realizes that they are relatively close to the edge of the forest and also spots smoke rising from distant campfires. It's the walking paths yeah.
Speaker 1:So it's like no matter what they're going to have to go through that.
Speaker 2:Oh, did you ever see the 13th warrior of Antonio Banderas? I have not. That is one I've wanted to watch. There's there's a, because it's in the kind of the same area, right, and they see, I didn't know that they see people with lights going through the forest and they call it like some kind of snake, like that's what it kind of reminded me of.
Speaker 1:Oh, you know, actually, maybe maybe I'm confusing that movie with something else, I don't know, but it sounds interesting. I didn't know. It was like, it was like in Sweden and stuff. Well, it was in like Norse. Oh, gotcha Like, or is it kind of just like people in the woods? Accidentally it was a period these things. It was a period, it was it was a period.
Speaker 1:It was a period the good administration attracts bears anchorman and I wonder if 13 Warriors is on something. I'd have to watch it so. So yeah, he sees all the campfires. He rejoins the two and tell them the news, but finds them with their flashlights pointed towards the trees saying they heard a noise. Suddenly, phil is dragged off screen by a creature posing as a tree. It's so cool how well it blends in with everything, cause I even go back to record it. I'm like, yeah, it's dark, it looks like a tree, big, long, spindly legs.
Speaker 2:You literally cannot see this thing until it moves, cause it blends.
Speaker 1:Because I even go back to record it. I'm like, yeah, it's dark, it looks like a tree, Big, long, spindly legs. And then, like you literally cannot see this thing until it moves because it blends, it's camouflaged so well, it's great, Because you know it has giant antlers and it looks and it's like skinny bony, so it looks like a tree. So, yeah, Luke runs and runs into a tree and is put back into the liquor store where we see him run out and see Dom, Phil and Hutch outside. He snaps out of it and sees Phil's flashlight with blood misting down around it Beautiful. He hears the creature all around him. Luke gets jumped, scared by Dom, who's hiding like a little bitch, and urges him to run with him.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and urges him to run with him. I thought for sure Dom was dead.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I was like I want him to die. Why couldn't? Phil live. He's the one that had to get naked and pray to the effigy, and so, yeah, they get to their feet and they begin to run and the creature gives them chase. I love it, though, when they're kind of hiding. They're like we're going to fucking die. It's like on the count of three though when they're kind of hiding, they're like we're gonna fucking die.
Speaker 3:It's like on the couch one, two, three, they're just like still just sitting there.
Speaker 1:It's like okay, just go um. So they pass phil's body, impaled on branches of a tree near a path of torches that leads to a small village. They seek shelter in the first building they see, and collapse on the floor, only to be beaten unconscious by its occupants. Yeah, great little scene. They just run in. They're like, oh, we're safe, kick to the face, yeah, and you kind of see people praying to Little Stone. So when they awaken they find themselves restrained by their hands in the basement with weird chanting around them oh, we're safe.
Speaker 2:Yeah, finally, and.
Speaker 1:And then an elderly woman enters and this is your first sign of shit Elderly woman.
Speaker 2:Not talking Chewing something she has a weird look on her face Never good.
Speaker 1:So the woman enters the basement and inspects the puncture marks on Luke's chest and gives him some water.
Speaker 1:She pulls down her dress a little bit and reveals the same pattern on her chest. It's like should we touch wounds. She does not give water to Dom, she turns to leave the basement, utters a command in a foreign language which prompts two men to grab Dom, hit him over the head and bring him to the upper floor of the cabin. Kick his ass. Yeah, he's just like screaming like oh God. And you're like man, they must be really beating him up. But we'll see what he's actually screaming about in a second.
Speaker 2:Because, yeah, I was confused, yeah, it's great, I don't know.
Speaker 1:So a younger woman enters the basement, explains that preparations are being made for sacrifice. Sometime later, dom is escorted back to the basement, beaten and bloodied but still alive. Tells Luke his nightmare in the cabin. He says he saw the people grabbing him and sacrificing him. And the cabin he says he saw the people grabbing him and sacrificing him and his wife was there, like the earlier where he had his nightmare in the first cabin. Um, he explains to luke that he will serve as human sacrifice to the creature and instructs him to find a way to escape and destroy the village.
Speaker 2:So what were they doing to prepare him for a ritual?
Speaker 1:um well, so we're about to have like luke's gonna get free and he to go up. I'm assuming they're all probably just chanting around him.
Speaker 2:They're probably all just it sounded like they were kicking his ass.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think they definitely were a little bit Well. I mean, he did get hit in the head once and I'm sure they probably like he's probably resisting and beat him a little bit, but I think they're all just kind of chanting around him. I don't know. That's what Colts do, right?
Speaker 2:They just like to chant? I don't know.
Speaker 1:Chant and, like you know, be just generally bad people. So Dom is taken outside of the cabin and brought to a wooden post where his hands are tied behind his back as they shift the night. Dom is tired of waiting. He's like hell with this, let's get it on. It's like I love it. It's like the one part where I'm like, oh crap, dom's kind of funny, I know yeah.
Speaker 1:He's like are we just going to wait all day here? Suddenly, a roar can be heard from the forest. The captors immediately follow their niece in worship. Dom has a vision of his wife emerging from the trees and holding his face in her hands. This, in reality, is the creature that has been pursuing the men. It bears resemblance to the wooden effigy discovered in the abandoned cabin. It's rad, it's badass, it's got, it's like a hood yeah, a hood.
Speaker 2:And the glowing eyes and the little beady eyes like hey.
Speaker 1:Oh, I got your head. It's like I love the little guy Gives him a smooch. It's like I love the little guy Gives him a smooch. He's like man, just shoot him there, axe him there or shoot him there, you know. So the creature removes Dom from the post and you get this rad shot where he's just carrying him by his head and impales him on branches on a nearby tree, leaving him to die. What a terrible death.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Awful, pretty horrible. I mean, at least you got to see something you never thought you're gonna see before you died like well, I didn't, I didn't see this one coming, you know if I had to put ways, I was gonna die, not my top 100 list, just soiling yourself this was ways 101, I thought I would die.
Speaker 2:Oh pretty awesome, though I love the monster.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's amazing, it's great, oh, and we haven't got to the best part with the monster yet. We're about there, though, so Desperate Escape. Oh, this is actually probably the most brutal part of the whole movie. Luke breaks one of his, breaks his own thumb to get loose of one of his restraints.
Speaker 2:Ugh, uh, fuck, dude yeah, I was like was that really, was that really necessary?
Speaker 1:did it even how would it really?
Speaker 2:done that much. I don't know. I guess I mean if you, I don't really know what that would do other than like maybe help you. Like, squeeze it yeah.
Speaker 1:I'm assuming it's just like because you can just like flex your thumb any way you need to it was always like I was like ow that you know what. That's too far movie. You could have just chewed it right. But like the thing you're supposed to do. If I remember correctly from self-defense classes that they gave us in I think it was like seventh grade or whatever we had these like little periods where we were able. They kind of gave us something fun to do. That's awesome.
Speaker 1:Mine was like rock, rock build model. We had like a film class, we had like bondage, uh, a self, a self defense one, and then there's this kind of like fun things that most schools don't do.
Speaker 2:It's like hey, here's a fun little defense for nerds, yeah, so that's what.
Speaker 1:And then you know, I always like flex your hands, so that even though I'm like what do you mean? I ain't got fucking wrists at all.
Speaker 2:I know they don't bulk up your wrist muscles.
Speaker 1:It's like I mean my, my right one, you know, a little bit stronger for whatever reason Okay, so um, yeah, he like breaks his thumb. Um, okay, so yeah, he like breaks his thumb and but he can't undo the second one, because he didn't break that thumb, I guess.
Speaker 1:And now you know he broke his thumb, so he has no use of that other hand and then a young woman comes in and when Luke asks about the creature, she explains that it is called Jotun, a godlike figure stemming from Scandinavian mythology, and that they provided sacrifices in return for immortality. She pulls out a whiteboard yeah, hold on a second, let me explain this perfectly Brings out PowerPoint. She states that Luke will take part in the ritual where he will submit to the creature and join the cult or be killed. Guess why? Him, she tells him, because his pain is great, right?
Speaker 2:so.
Speaker 1:I don't know if it feeds off the pain or if it's just like out of all four of them that he had to choose from, it's like he'll most likely join the cult because the monster feeds off the pain that or it's just like he thinks he's more susceptible to join the cult because you know cults, they feed off your uh, you know your fears and your insecurities or, if you're, on you know bad luck, or you know no money or something or a great pain. They'll be like, hey, we'll make it better that's essentially what this, uh, what this creature is doing.
Speaker 1:It's like I'll take away all your pain and you get to live forever, would?
Speaker 1:have worked unless he saw the thing upstairs which we're about to get to, because after she leaves, luke's breaks freeze from his restraints and leaves the basement. He ventures to the upper floor of the cabin, hearing prayers and screaming, coming from behind a closed door and armed with a burning torch, he like pumps himself up, like alright, here we fucking go, opens the door and finds a twisted congregation of mummified but still living humans. Fucking rad. Evidently this is the end result of the immortality granted by the worship of creatures.
Speaker 2:He just gets to be a mummy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so it's the first time I watched it, I was like I'm enjoying it. I'm enjoying it. This is kind of getting to the third act, which most third acts of horror movies. It's always like alright, we know how this is gonna go now. But then, whenever he opens his door, I was like oh, I was like oh hold on a second.
Speaker 2:This is rad. This is a cool party.
Speaker 1:This is a really cool movie. Now this movie just went up a few stars in my book. I don't know. There's just something so hella creepy about hearing a bunch of noises opening a door and you just see corpses yeah, but they're alive, yeah. And then, even though it's like really kind of muppety and goofy, when when the one starts moving.
Speaker 2:I was like, oh, this is oh, I know. I was like orgasm.
Speaker 1:It's so good. It's everything I want in a movie. Immortality sucks. Yeah, it's just like, oh wait, everything's bad, no matter what's gonna happen, to luke at this point all of it sucks a good thing.
Speaker 2:They were like really flammable.
Speaker 1:Yeah well, I mean I thought, boy, they're all just ash just dried out yeah they're just like kindling at this point and it's the worst place to put all these dead bodies there's no smoking sign yeah uh, no, what a great reveal. It's like, no matter what, there's gonna be horror wherever, because even if you lived forever and you didn't age, or whatever your body is. No, what a great reveal.
Speaker 1:It's like, no matter what, there's gonna be horror wherever, cause even if you lived forever and you didn't age, or whatever your body just decays you would constantly be in fear that you have to sacrifice something to this creature, or it's gonna come and kill you, or you get older and you become this forever like death becomes us. Yeah, it's like a different type of hell. Or you're Luke at the end of this movie and you get to survive, but now none of your friends live. There is no like yippee.
Speaker 2:I don't know, I could have given a yippee. I got it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there would be. His yippee is so, following Dom's last witch, he sets the worshippers on fire. This axe attracts the beast, who emerges from the forest to find the cabin burning. Um luke goes downstairs and punches the old lady. Yes, yeah, because the lady has the same face she's had this entire time and then he sees her and he just takes a second, thanks, and he's like ah, fuck it so good.
Speaker 1:And it reminds me of the wicker man movie with nicholas Cage, where he was just running through this island punching women the whole time. It's always so sudden and crazy. Yeah, you can just trip her. It's so great and a fun thing thing. A little fact in the book this she's, this older woman's considered a witch and she has hooves for feet. Nice, yeah um clip clopping around if I was her, I'd just walk in like I'm on a road the whole time, because I love like the sound of like horse horses walking on roads.
Speaker 2:It's a very sad Sounds like two empty halves of coconuts and you're banging them together.
Speaker 1:It's a nice sound for me that, and like when cars are slowly driving on gravel. It's like ASMR for me. I don't know, it's weird. Probably because I owned horses and gravel roads, but so but uh. So yeah, he knocks the shit out of this old lady and, in a rage, the creature kills all the remaining worshippers. Luke uses this opportunity to escape from the burning cabin undetected, armed with a rifle and an axe. Let's talk about this little like closet they have, is it from all the people?
Speaker 1:yes it's so fun. It's all the people that they captured. They just kept all their stuff, so you have all these guns from people that, like I guess, fought back in those days.
Speaker 2:The cultists have been alive for like hundreds of years at this point.
Speaker 1:Well, the ones up top, yeah, maybe those probably been up there for like three, four hundred years maybe does?
Speaker 2:it gives them extra long life, but not vitality yeah, you don't keep to keep your age you still age. That'd be cool.
Speaker 1:They've been, like been alive since yeah, I mean days it would have been like, yeah, it'd be great to live forever until you're get put into that attic and it's like, well, this sucks y'all got a tv or anything no tv and I'm wondering like, do you think they even knew what the?
Speaker 2:I mean they had to have known what all that stuff was yeah, but it's like I would.
Speaker 1:I would just be like disimpel me, dude, disimpel me, I don't want to be. Or I'd be like yeah, uh, I'll join your cult until I get old and then I'll yeah, they'll throw you, throw me off a cliff. Yeah and just stab me dog so, um, yes, he's got the rifle and an axe. Before running into the woods, luke aims and takes a shot at the creature as about to kill a worshipper.
Speaker 2:Let it know where you are.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know it's like why didn't you just run, dude, especially since it was like very occupied with this whole cabin shit? He was curious, and it's the beautiful shot, though, where the cabin's on fire.
Speaker 3:And you got the giant elk and it's just lifting someone.
Speaker 1:And then lifting someone. And then he just takes aim. What if it hates bullets, turns out, hates them and will kill you if you do it, it doesn't hurt him very much. Yeah, so the creature pursues him, attempting to cripple his mind by causing hallucinations of his reoccurring nightmare the fluorescent lights in the woods and like like there's not as many shelves. It's more forest than liquor store at this point. What a great little sequence. It looked rad as hell.
Speaker 2:It was so great and it's amazing Takes a bottle and starts drinking it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's like damn I guess, since I'm here.
Speaker 2:You drunk as fuck boy Could have been drinking buddies.
Speaker 1:The creature's got like 240ies taped to his hands Like where are you going, luke? Let's party. So the creature eventually catches him and forces him onto his knees, offering Luke a chance to submit. The creature shows his full form by standing on its hind legs and creating a tower of rotisserie. Hell yeah, yeah, boy. Are you kidding me? Best shot of rotisserie? Hell yeah, yeah, boy, I love that shit. Are you kidding me, Best shot of the whole movie?
Speaker 1:Because it's just like you got like its front legs, you got its antlers and then you also got its arms. It's like a four-story tower of just monstrosity. Yes, and it looks. It's like every time it like gets a little taller. It's like a new design. It just stretches out. Every time it stretches more and more. It's like what is this thing? It's so cool. I love it.
Speaker 1:Whoever came up with the idea? I wish I could shake your damn hand. All six of them. Yeah, what a great creature. Totally worth. I mean, even if this movie was worse, I'd still probably recommend it for the movie. It's one of the best creatures, like monster creatures.
Speaker 2:I've ever seen For a while.
Speaker 1:Like I don't remember, I don't know what else there really is, for the past few years at least. So he sees an axe and he's also seeing Rob next to the axe and it's like Rob looks at him. He's like now I'm going to act, or now I'm going to act.
Speaker 2:Or now I'm going to axe the three old ladies that he's punching.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Luke, what if that's what he did? Instead of seeing Rob, he saw an old lady and then looked at the creature and it became an old lady and it's like, yeah. I'm ready, so Luke decides to take action.
Speaker 1:finally, he uses an axe which he had previously taken from one of the worshippers to strike the creature on its head. He then follows the sunlight emerging from the forest into an open field. The creature does not emerge from the tree line and it seems unable to follow. The monster roars at him and he screams back in triumph. Luke turns from the monster and heads into the direction of a paved road with a passing car.
Speaker 2:Sign of civilization, get set by a car Dang.
Speaker 1:Rats, I love the idea that like the creature screams, luke screams. The creature screams again. Luke screams like you know what. I don't even want to fucking follow you anymore. I'll let you go on purpose. I wouldn't even fully try. So, like you got one lucky shot, I mean really like he would have never got out there if it wasn't for, like you know, the dumb like cultist people. Yeah, hey guys, you gotta tie them better.
Speaker 2:Tie their arms and feet at the same time, and their technology isn't that great yeah maybe they could've used some of the all those years living, I don't have knowledge, though you know couldn't talk to any of the people upstairs.
Speaker 1:Be like.
Speaker 2:I'll tell you how we tied them if they had a record player, like surely they could've got some nylon, yeah right like who's carrying that record player in the woods?
Speaker 1:some zip ties yeah, I don't know, is that a battery powered?
Speaker 1:zip, I guess it could have been cranked. Yeah, it had to be, that's right, that's true, um man, fantastic film. Let's get into the point of the movie. I think uh point is survival and kind of having survivors guilt. Yeah, I think survivors guilt yeah, that's mainly what it is. And you know people not understanding like how scary those actually, those situations actually are where it's like shit, it's life or death and it's like I want to protect my friend, but why is my friend antagonizing these guys? Come on, let's just get rid of it. And so you never know how you're gonna act in those situations. And it's a fucked up feeling. It was a movie about someone like finally getting the courage to punch a woman fight everybody, but again so late.
Speaker 1:All his friends died, but I mean he didn't know he didn't let him die.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:He kind of had nothing to do with it but you know, yeah, and also don't be a little Weasley bitch who's thinking they could do something different. Dom you think the monster would have even hurt him, since he had the marks. Well, he would, because the marks was like the sign, like hey, you're going to be a part of the cult, I'm going to give you the opportunity. That's why he keeps pushing them down to bow and then he keeps standing up.
Speaker 1:He's like I'm not going to join your cult. He's like, all right tree, I'll kill you. It's me, yotan and Mr Hanky. Yeah, so that is what we think the point of the movie is. If you have another idea, send us an email.
Speaker 2:Now we're going to hit our next Exterior decorating.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh God, Yotan's so good at it. I bet he loves Christmas. He finds the tallest tree and puts as many humans as he can in it.
Speaker 1:Then during Christmas he burns it, so it's like lights. So we're going to head to our next category the good, the bad, the ugly, the fine. We discussed the good of the film something we liked, the scene, the character. The bad, something we didn't. The ugly, something that didn't age well. The fine, something that did age well. So I, the ugly, something that didn't age well to find something that did age well. So, uh, I thought the good is like it's just a very, uh, creative story and you know it's fun.
Speaker 1:Folk horror, which is something I love a lot, and, um, I think it's well plotted. I think there's only like a little down moment, uh, and it kind of feels like it's one of those. Once they get to the cabin, that's where I'm like I kind of know how these movies are, because I've watched a lot of old horror movies like this. So when they're in that I'm like all right, we're gonna, we're gonna have to deal with this for a little bit. But it was that reveal of the people up top where I was like this is a little different, this is different.
Speaker 1:I mean, I also think rave spall, the main character, luke, I think he did he's fantastic he looks so much like simon pegg yeah he, he looks just so fucking british he looks like a british guy he's british handsome and this is what all british handsome people look like in my mind. But yeah, he's like in big short, he's uh. You ever seen life of pie?
Speaker 1:yeah, he's a guy uh, interviewing um the older version of him telling the story of on the boat he's in Hot Fuzz. He's which is funny that you say Simon Pegg. He's like one of the. I think he's the one that's a twin. There's like two of them or whatever.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and yeah, the ritual. That's what he's mostly known for. He's been in a shit ton of stuff. He's in jurassic world, fallen kingdom. He's like the bad guy in that stuff. Yeah, great little actor. He's always better than usually the movies he's in, um, but yeah, that's it. You got anything else for the good?
Speaker 2:I just I love the creature yeah, the creature creature and the scary woods yeah, it's amazing it worked so well.
Speaker 1:I put the woods that age well, woods age well.
Speaker 2:Sometimes the monsters don't fit where they you know, like the area where they are and that's maybe that's part of the horror is that they're out of place. Yeah. But he's the one out of place.
Speaker 1:They're strangers in a strange land. Yeah, yeah. That's right.
Speaker 2:For land. Yeah, yeah, that's right.
Speaker 1:Um for me the bad I put, I was like it's kind of my bad and the ugly, like two things. I did not. It's just all horror movies have like a character like this and I'm always like, oh dude, what if we just had a bunch of cool people together in the woods just doing fun stuff? Yeah, it's kind of like the cabin in the woods, you know like, even though all the characters are acting like assholes, but they're so I don't know. It's funny and cool like dom's, just a straight up piece of shit I did kind of like him right before he died.
Speaker 1:Yeah, whenever he's just kind of like like, of course, him being upset because he's like, oh, I gotta be on this pole forever. It's, it's very, dom.
Speaker 2:Let me speak to your manager yeah, and I'll tell you who I think Dom reminds me of in real life after the podcast.
Speaker 1:Okay, did you have anything other than Dom for the bad? He's also my ugly, so I don't have anything for the ugly either. No, I don't really have anything else. So do you have any uglies?
Speaker 2:No, I mean, I think this whole movie aged pretty well I mean it's yeah, there's nothing I found like horribly wrong with it. It was so good, yeah, um, maybe that it never came out on d on blu-ray yeah, I don't even know if they have like it's because it's a netflix film.
Speaker 1:they don't release their shit on Blu-ray or anything anymore. It's bullshit. Unless it's like they're super popular Stranger Things gets hard copies and things like that because they can put a $70 price tag on a 4K of that and make a ton of money and then be like, hey, we'll make another season 30 years from now.
Speaker 1:For the fine. I put David Bruckner, which you know, the whole point I was doing this film. I didn't even say his name till now and I was like the whole point of doing this is because there's the VHS. But we're going to talk more about him during the VHS segment of his that we're going to have Wednesday of this week after this release. And also folk horror. I'm a sucker for this shit. Anytime I listen to audiobooks, it's mostly folk horror. It's usually kind of Native American horror. Oh yeah, because Stephen Graham Jones did like If you want a really good Native American kind of folk horror, only the Good Indians. So good, dude, sounds cool.
Speaker 2:Oh, I'm into that shit I love listening to ghost like people tell good, like native americans tell ghost stories. Yeah, some of it's the most fucked shit.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I love it it's all just to scare people so they don't do things they don't want them to do.
Speaker 2:It's awesome spirits and shit yeah coming to life.
Speaker 1:It's so great. And another one, um, I really like there's a book called sacred animals. It's kind of about foxes and cute little foxes yeah, well you'd have to read on um.
Speaker 2:You got anything for the fun, uh, yeah I think, uh, I love seeing the most extreme of people's imagination like come to light, like come to the screen, like the big screen.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know, it's fucking crazy. Like it's like, wow, like I don't know how the book is 100% compared to this, but it's like if the book's, if it's a little bit like the book, they did a good job.
Speaker 2:I feel like, and if, like you, learn about old, like gods and creatures like Eldritch gods, that people used to believe in, a long time ago and like bringing that stuff to this type of I guess like to the movies.
Speaker 1:Yeah, fucking Because you don't see it a lot really, you know, it's like I feel like most of that's like in the video games we play and stuff, yeah, or it's like comic books and it's always it's always not 100 accurate to what, like, they probably believed in, but I feel like it has the bones of it how do you think they did the monster?
Speaker 2:do you think it was all cgi?
Speaker 1:well, there was like a really long fact. It's it's a blend of of CGI and practical effects in some scenes but, yeah, mostly probably CGI and a lot of like the shots and stuff. It's wild. It's like, hey, this is what all movies should look like, if you're gonna have CGI in it, because it looked fantastic. Not, there was hardly any points where I was like that looks fake. I don't think there was one point where I was like that looks like a fake creature, even whenever it's like because, like whenever it's standing on its hind legs and it does its little pose like worship me, baby, I was just like man.
Speaker 2:All the pretty girls look like this.
Speaker 1:I was like damn, that looks really good. I know that's probably CGI, but it looked really good yeah.
Speaker 2:The face of the monster with, like, the eyes on the hood and the dark face, yeah, like the hidden features. What do you think it looked like underneath? I don't know, but it reminds me of the monsters from there's a video game called Return of the Obra Dinn.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, I've heard you talk about that, yeah.
Speaker 2:It looks like those things. Yeah, I mean, those things are like riding crabs and shit, but like oh hell yeah. But not like, but just love it. It's cool.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. So that's that category. And now we're going to hit up our next category, double feature. It's where we recommend a movie alongside this movie. You're never going to guess, mine's also another folklore horror movie, and you know we're doing. I did this because we're talking about the director. In terms of VHS. This movie is called the Apostle, or just Apostle, and it's directed by Gareth Evans, who, in VHS too, he has a segment and it's the best VHS segment today. Still, it's really good. I always wanted this, uh, gareth evans always wanted him to get, like a enough money to make his own horror movie and he did, and it's this great bulk horror movie. It's a in 1905, a drifter on a dangerous mission to rescue his kidnapped sister tangles with a sinister religion cult on an isolated island. Sounds a lot like wicker man, doesn't't it? But yeah, it's great and the way, like the kind of what they do with the island is really great and like how the effects of the horror is you just have to watch it, it's got Dan Stevens in it.
Speaker 1:Nice, you know, if you know him, he's great. He played the Beast in Beauty and the Beast He's's also.
Speaker 2:He was in downton abbey uh, that's where he got his like fame from really right oh and uh, yeah, he's just really handsome and good and everything that he ever does.
Speaker 1:so he's also in, um, speaking of vhs more one of the guy, the guy who did, uh, the new godzilla versus kong and stuff like that, that director which I'm blanking on right now, um, godzilla vs Kong and stuff like that, that director which I'm blanking on right now he did a movie called the Guest and it's this really synthy 80s-style kind of thriller which is really great and it's got the girl from it Follows in it and it's directed by Adam Wingard. It's a really good movie. You should check that out if you want to support people that are in VHS films. So, yeah, what do you got for your double feature?
Speaker 2:I was thinking the Void. Oh fuck, that's so good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I remember watching that. That movie's really good. It's the one where the cover has the triangle.
Speaker 2:It's got the cultists. It's got big pointy knives, all the eldritch horror monsters coming out of a weird dimension.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they're like stuck in a police station or something like that.
Speaker 2:It's like a hospital.
Speaker 1:Yeah, hospital and there's like tentacles and shit, fucking rules.
Speaker 2:That movie's great oh.
Speaker 1:I completely forgot about that movie. That'd been a fun movie to do on the podcast. Yeah, um, but yeah, that's a great recommendation. Y'all should check that out. And damn, we just finished the ritual. Make sure you join us next week because we're doing another director that's in the vhs segment. It's actually the next segment we're doing is a ty west segment. He did x, pearl, maxine, sacrament. Um, we're doing his. His second movie, I believe, after the inn. It's called House of the Devil. It's a slow burn movie but it fucking rules.
Speaker 1:It's very 70s style horror too, which is funny because I think that's probably his favorite section of horror, because that's what X kind of was 70s, texas Chainsaw Massacre style. But this is very much babysitter horror. It's great, it's such a fun movie. Some people say it's too slow.
Speaker 2:I say Is it like if the Babysitter's Club was just a stick you got beat with no.
Speaker 1:Damn.
Speaker 2:I'm not going to say anything too much Greta Gerwig's in it.
Speaker 1:The director of Barbie. Oh nice, you should see what. Anything too much Greta Gerwig's in it. The director of Barbie? Oh nice, you should see what happens to her. Oh no, can't wait. Love it, barbie. They did you wrong, girl. Yeah, so join us next week for that. We are full effect, baby. We just getting started with our horror month, or month and a half, nearly two months, of Halloween. Yeah, it's the best time of the year. Agreed, it's getting closer to Halloween. It's just the horror movies are about to start watching, all the ones I kind of banked for the Halloween season. There's so many, so there's like Companion. Hard Eyes, smile 2 is still be able to watch that 28 weeks later or years later is about to come out.
Speaker 1:It's coming out on Netflix September 20th.
Speaker 2:What.
Speaker 1:Yes, that's in nine days. I'm going to also own it, also watch the movie Friendship, with Tim Robbins in it. Oh yeah, bro, I saw the ad for that. Yeah, it's everything I wanted in a movie. It's like he's doing his thing, yeah.
Speaker 1:But there's also a story around it and it's maybe one of the most stressful, funniest movies you'll see. Is this Will Ferrell, isn't it? No, paul Rudd, oh, okay, and Paul Rudd's great. He's like a mixture between his character and Anchorman and just like a regular guy, yeah, and it's kind of a perfect mix. But we're not talking about that, because I love everything about the people in that movie Tim Robbins is so good.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's so good.
Speaker 1:Stressful, bro. It's a stressful movie, but it's like I don't know. It's great. So yeah, join us next week for the House of the Devil, not Friendship, even though I just can't wait to talk about that movie on the podcast. And if you want to leave us some fan mail, you can it. There's a link at the top that says send us some fan mail. You click it. You can text it from your phone. At the bottom there's our email. We recommend mailbag at gmailcom. Send us some email that way. Just whatever you want to send, just you know, make it about movies, dude. Um, leave us a review. We got another new follower this week, holy.
Speaker 1:Holy shit we're slowly going to get a hundred followers, maybe in another year. Um, yeah, if you know anybody that wants to listen to a fun podcast, we're just two dudes just to talk about movies and usually make jokes about stuff and this is a podcast for you, tell everybody in the review. Hey guys, funny. They also also sometimes do like baby kid talk. So that was a lot of this episode. I hope you enjoy that. It's fun. For us it's either that or hey toots. It's like our two things we go to. I'd like to thank Joey Prosser for our intro and outro music. You can follow him on X at Mr Joey Prosser. I don't know if anybody even uses that platform anymore, except to just yell about things that they are upset about, mainly the Tennessee Titans, because week one game sucked. But yeah, this has been the we Recommend Podcast. I've been Jesse, I've been Jason. Hey, there's two of us and one podcast. Let's fucking go. Bye.
Speaker 1:Bye you.
