Living Left

Curious By Nature, Disciplined By Habit

• Ann-Marie Burton, Tanya Garcia • Season 1 • Episode 4

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We swap a city hike for a deeper look at how curiosity and discipline shape midlife, from daily routines to brave little experiments that make life feel wider. A walk, a map, and a flurry of left turns become a clear plan to try three new things and say yes on purpose.

• using a hike to reveal leadership, trust and time styles
• curiosity versus discipline as complementary tools
• finding a buddy to lower the barrier to trying new things
• low‑stakes starts like a beginner pickleball session
• work from home shrinking circles and how to expand them
• Big Magic and creative living beyond fear
• small daily experiments in walking, cooking and music
• a simple homework: three new things this month

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SPEAKER_01:

Christ is Living Left, a space where we redefine success, purpose, and identity through honest, unfiltered conversation. It's not about finding what's next. It's about owning what's left. We're navigating business, family, change, chaos, and figuring out life. One left turn at a time. The rules? There aren't any. The raw talk between friends, honest, messy, necessary. Let's go there. Good morning, Tanya. Good morning, Anne-Marie.

SPEAKER_00:

Go, Jays, go. Go, Jays, go. What's funny is we'll like this podcast will go live and then we'll already be happy about it when we see it.

unknown:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

Or sad. But regardless, I am very proud of the team, no matter what happens. But game five. Game five tonight. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

So maybe we'll hustle to get this one up and going before it's over and determined. Yes, it could be over. It was gonna go game six. Yeah. Or what? Okay. Or game seven, hopefully not. All right. Well, we're here, we're back, we're having a lot of fun doing this podcast. We are. It's actually just I enjoy just a fun time to hang out with you for half an hour every week. It's kind of always, always. So we spent some time last week hanging out, well, having a walk and talk meeting uh on Friday. And um, for those who are listening, I really enjoy walking and hiking. I really and we had a whole conversation about whether I hike by myself and Tanya. You were like, no, that doesn't make sense because you could fall and hurt yourself and who would come and get you.

SPEAKER_00:

It's like there's these constant reminders as to how we are so much the same but different. And I love that, right? Like we're the same and similar. I walk every day, I really enjoy it, but I would never venture in the woods. I've tried by myself for very long because I'm nervous if I fall and hurt myself, which I have like literally tumbled. Would anybody find me? It's the same. I'm like, I'm experiencing this entirely as living on my own, too. I totally get it for another podcast. But yeah, but you're like, I don't understand that. Of course I would go. I will, I will scale this cliff by myself.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm like, scale the cliff. But I'm I I think I can do it. Basically, I'm a little more careful because when I hurt my ankle a few years ago, that was like a little more careful. Like, but I wear proper shoes and proper socks, and I make sure that when I'm, I don't know if you notice when we were walking, I like to walk ahead of you because sometimes if I have to respond quickly to the person ahead of me, that's when I hurt my ankle.

SPEAKER_00:

But anyway, but can I build in this? And I know this is, but you said we'd start talking. Yeah. The other thing that's different between you and I, I am a total, I like to follow people. So, like, why I love doing this with you is you choose the path, you tell me where to go, you walk ahead, which makes me happy because I don't have to think about anything, I just follow you. Where, you know, and I'm sure most women understand this, where you show up, you know, primarily as the lead in your entire life, where there's opportunities where you can pass that off to someone, I'm like, you go, Anne Marie, I'll just be right here behind you. And if I fall, I'll just scream and you'll be able to come back and get me. It's totally fine.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes. Well, we were hiking, and uh, I had an idea. So for those who were like, we were at Bronte Provincial Park, which is in Oakville, and there's two entrances. There's like a day entrance, which is closer to me, and there's a camping entrance that's closer to you. And I've walked on both sides, but there's a really nice path that's high up and above the river, the creek. And I was determined that we would find this path.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes, you were.

SPEAKER_01:

And and for whatever reason, we we were struggling to find it from the way we walked in. And then we did use Google Maps, but the best part is honestly, if I was alone, I wouldn't even have used that. But I was kind of feeling responsible that I would lead you in the wrong direction, and then I would probably sense my anxiety about it. Well, we had a little bit of a time crunch too, because you had to be back for an appointment. So, I mean, although we hiked for a couple of hours, we couldn't hike for like three hours and get totally lost. So we didn't bring you water or snacks, we didn't bring anything. So I kept checking. But if I was on my own, I would have just been like, Meh, this is probably the direction, and I would have just gone. I wouldn't have looked. And then there was a couple of times you're like, what does the map say? What does the map say? What's our time check? I was like, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00:

And I was totally relaxed in the moment.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, you totally mostly sort of, sort of relaxed, making sure we were back at precisely 10:30. We do show up the same way in most in all aspects of our life, don't we, Anne Right? Yes, I know. I I'm time blind, and I just want to follow my own path and we'll get back when we get back. That's and you're like, nope, we're gonna do this. But we did a lot of left turning. We did making like for we were ch we were laughing, or like, looking at look at us. Like every time we turn, we're turning left, we're turning left, and we were like south was left, we were going left. We kept saying, and then when we weren't sure which to go, like there was a few crossroads, like, well, we're gonna have to turn left. That's the direction we're taking. We were so we were being totally nerdy, and and we're like, we should be recording the podcast right now. We're turning left again. Goofs, anyway. But we did find like a few little, but it was beautiful, and the it's October, so the leaves are changing, and it's just that's one of my favorite things is to move and be outside, like 100%. And I enjoy that more than stomping around on the sidewalk.

SPEAKER_00:

Like I agree with you wholeheartedly, and now I know that there is an entrance literally a kilometer from my front door, which I did not realize. Yeah, so tell everyone that that was a funny little moment. Well, again, as we continue to show up the same way in all aspects of our life, while I consider myself adventurous in most cases, I'd like to have a buddy because I can be quite rigid in a box. So, like I am a very disciplined person. I do the same thing, I can eat the same thing every morning, I can do the same exercise every morning. So I've moved to a new area, so I feel like I've been adventuring out, kind of, but I'm doing more of that concrete stomping to your point. Like I'm walking the streets because it's safer in case anything happens. Like, I don't like the idea of coyotes and animals, but I do love the idea of walking in the in in nature. I just prefer to do it with someone who could protect me if something happens. That's all. Um and you were like, we had this time crunch, we should meet here. And I said, Okay, and I don't really pay attention to things, I just follow leads. And I left far too early because as I drove down to the entrance, you told me, I was like, oh my gosh, that I could literally walk there. Yes, you could have. Which is actually probably why I say yes, because I would rather follow someone into something new than proact, it's hard for me, which gets to our point about curiosity. While I'm curious, I'm curious adjacent to a person.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, you're so you know why you say yes? You know why, you know why saying yes is easy for you? Why? Because you've disciplined yourself to say yes. Yes, that's a very easy decision to make. Like, so you actually have already predetermined the decision, which is I'm going to say yes when someone says, Do you want to do this?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

But the curious, yeah, you're right. Like the curious, so that's the theme of today is how do you live a curious life? And how how do you how do you find curiosity in small ways every day, all the time? And particularly if you are more disciplined and you have a a way that you do your day, how do you allow space and fluidity for that curiosity? And that's a really good question. Because if you are structured, there's probably not a lot of like free time in your day that you could kind of like turn your brain into curiosity, or if you have like my brain just sort of lives there, and so like I find the discipline like the polar opposite, like that's harder for me.

SPEAKER_00:

Like, can we talk for a minute about the other aha between you and I? Because what our listeners don't know, or those close to us probably do know. Like, we are such a two, like a perfect duo because we are the same deep down, our values are the same, and but the way in which we approach is entirely different. Like, I'll have conversations with you, and you'll say, Because we've traveled together, you've experienced, and you're like, Oh my god, you do the same thing every day. And I said, Don't you? And you're like, Well, no, I wake up every day and do something entirely different. I'm like, What? What do you mean? And so you're like, No, I don't know. I'll wake up and I'll decide to do this in the first 15 minutes versus like I get up every day and do exactly the same thing for the first two hours of my life. And if I'm not at home and I'm somewhere else, I will recreate that.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, I've seen that.

SPEAKER_00:

You've witnessed, and that's it.

SPEAKER_01:

I find that almost stifling sometimes. I'm like, well, if I get up and I don't want, oh, I know where I'll find you. So it's better that you like to wake up earlier because then you can have your your discipline is done, and I don't. But I mean, that's not most yeah. Well, I mean, again, everyone's a little bit different. I think people are different.

SPEAKER_00:

I think they probably live differently. It's just you think you live the same way, and everyone kind of runs in the same, and then you realize, oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I think that when I had to go to an office every day, and when my kids were young with the same structure, like the school structure, my days were a lot more structured.

SPEAKER_00:

Of course.

SPEAKER_01:

And so I can do that, but in left to my own devices, yes, um, yeah, it can be it can be high. And again, that's maybe I don't know if that's the right way to live. It just I don't I've never analyzed it until we start talking about, oh, you do the same thing, or we talk to our team and everyone does the same thing and they have the same breakfast. And I'm like, huh, never thought about that.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah. I don't think there's a right or wrong way. I think the beauty in it is, I think, with age too, you know, like um I've grown a lot just kind of working so closely with you because you're we're both so different, right? And I think we both have an appreciation for that. Like we laugh about it and and respect and appreciate it versus try and change it. Um and I think that you realize that wow, there's a whole other way. And that just is. And and you're because you're right, like society and life is pretty structured and disciplined, and now there's this whole other world of humans who aren't that way. What? Because I'm like that no matter what. Like that's just I am just structured that way. I'm could actually consider myself quite boring, which is why I which is why I've always said I find the most extreme personalities of humans in my life. Like my friend group is like they're not quiet humans. And I think that's because I consider myself pretty structured and quiet.

SPEAKER_01:

And I need to So you find your curious, so your curious that's interesting. So your curiosity comes in observing and participating with people that might be more curious, maybe they're more curious, or they're just different from you.

SPEAKER_00:

Or they'll pull me out. Like I'm I can I'm curious to a point. Like if I like you said this, and I have other friends. If you tell me to listen to a podcast, read a book because you know me and you think I would it would be great, I will do that. But to proactively do research and find those things is not what I would do. I would do some, I'd find something else to do. So I need direction. So I align myself with curious, interesting people because I know that if I'm left to my own devices, I will lead a pretty simple, which is fine. Like it's fine, but I do also enjoy all of this other stuff and growth. I just know that like you always ask me, like, why don't you just do that? It's like what I say to you, why don't you just get up at the same time every morning? Like and you're like, why would I do that? And I'm like, why would I do that? I so I think we have found ways, which comes with age and wisdom and knowing yourself. So back to like living a curious life, I think why we wanted to talk about this is you know, the walking and the past is uh is an amazing example and analogy of that of how we both approach it. Um, but it's it can be very easy, I think, for all of us, especially coming off of our last podcast and talking about time, where you know, you had all you were so busy and structured and driven by other things, and now you have all this time. It is don't underestimate the immense difficulty it will be to pull yourself out of that. And what are the way out of the routine? What are the things you can do?

SPEAKER_01:

That's a really interesting point. So, so if you're in midlife or whatever at the time of transition and you're switching into a new transition and you want to be more curious and you want to join and do things, but you just don't know what those things are, or you're not sure how to fill that new time. So that's what we talked about last. And actually, a lot of people, we had quite a few listeners to that Empty Nest podcast, which was like exciting. And a lot of people wrote like reached out to us to say things like, Oh my god, I've been spent spending a lot of time working. So the reason they're working is just your other point, is probably because that's the routine. And so, what are the other curious things? And one of the things we talked about when we were walking was about like how, and just to reiterate what you were saying, it's so important to find that buddy or the curious person. Like, it's okay if everything's not your idea, just join in to the thing that is something else, because then you wind up living life with different people. So I know our leading left, we have our like little pickleball activity we're doing next week. Amazing. And I know I've talked to some people are like, Well, I've not really played pickleball, been you're curious about pickleball, but I don't know if I can come. I'm like, that's exactly a great example of curiosity. Like this, this, what we're what we planned is like a little training, coaching thing, and then a little game. Super easy, low commitment, no shouldn't not a big deal. Really just show up with your running shoes. Like, that's about it's not a good thing.

SPEAKER_00:

And that's what you need. I think that's what probably most people need. Like, if I was if I was here, I was totally gonna do that because I've been talking about pickleball forever. Yeah, but I will, I am not the person who's just gonna show up. Like, I will eventually, but it takes a lot. But if someone organizes something, yeah, and I just need to attach myself to that, that is the best case scenario. So agreed. Like it is creating and finding people, groups that you're comfortable with that just it is. I mean, what's the um adage in um surrounding yourself? Like you are who your like your top five people are your closest friends. And I believe that wholeheartedly. Um but if all the five friends are the same, well, yeah, and that can happen for sure, which comes back to what we talk about in it's important to be curious or um say yes and do things. I mean, it's a lot of the reasons why I've always said yes to things that aren't within, because you want to meet other people, you want to have different conversations. You know, work does that, but now that we're all working from home, or not everyone is, but for those of you who do, how many conversations with different people and different points of view do you have? How many times do you do things that you wouldn't normally do? Like, really think about that. Because I think when you talk about a beautiful life and living a full life, you know, you want some of that. It's not for everyone, 100%. I'm not judging it either way, but there's such fulfillment in the idea of curiosity and being out of your comfort zone and all of that.

SPEAKER_01:

There's an amazing book, and I'm gonna reread it, and maybe I'll encourage you to read it too. I read it um before we opened Left Turn. So actually, you know when I read it? I listened to it. It's called Big Magic, and it's by Elizabeth Gilbert. I love Elizabeth Gilbert. Yeah, she is, and it's it was her first, it's like a nonfiction book, and I listened to it actually talk about curiosity. You know what I was doing when I listened to it? I was driving from Ontario to the Gas Bay in Quebec, and I went on a solo trip by myself. And I I took so I had myself, my minivan, and I went off to go to the sexy by myself. And I went on on a 10-day trip to Quebec, up to the Gas Bay, where I like did whale watching and kayaking with seals all by myself. And I didn't have anyone to talk to, so I brought up but I had a bunch of audiobooks, and this was one of them. And I remember listening to it and driving through absolutely stunning landscapes along this, like the seaside in northern Quebec, and thinking, oh my God, okay. And it was essentially all about what we're talking about, which is how to lead a more curious life in all components personal, work, family. And and it's and that the more curious your life is, usually people are happier and they're more fulfilled. And I bet you it's got to do with belonging. I'm gonna have to go back and listen to it.

SPEAKER_00:

You know what? I'm gonna have to go back to that as well. I think we should all, everyone, even and if you're listening, look up Big Magic. I'm a big fan of uh Elizabeth Gilbert as well in her writing.

SPEAKER_01:

So as I'm talking, I could be remembering it incorrectly that it might not be curious and it might be creative, but they're kind of the same. They're kind of the same, they're kind of the same. And so people often will say, Oh, I'm not creative. And what does that mean? Okay, so you're not crafty, you're not what you don't like to paint, but creative is about creating creative solutions, creative, like opening alternatives. It's exactly it's just being open-minded. And so curious, creative, I could be wrong, like as I'm now thinking, I didn't didn't not look this up before chat. It's okay. Um, but it is called big magic. And the small ways, like I think about small ways. Like we were talking about walking, simple example. So I will walk, and if I'm in a if I have only a certain limit of time and I know exactly like, okay, I can do this quick two and a half K, quick, I'll I'll repeat a loose area. But I was thinking the other day, I was like, how can I make my neighborhood stomps more interesting? And I thought, well, maybe I'll just make sure I walk down every single street in the neighborhood. Because every street is there are some streets I walk down fairly often, some I never go down, or I'm never, you know, swing down to the cul-de-sac. And especially when it's interesting, like there's massive Halloween decorations out now, or they'll be sure, you know, or I like to look at the gardens, or sometimes I'm out walking, I'm like, I'm gonna make this more interesting for myself, and I'm gonna look at like all the front door decor. And I wanna see, oh, there's some ideas for those planters or whatever, versus just walk, walk, walk with no purpose. It's like a scavenger hunt almost for myself.

SPEAKER_00:

That's really good.

SPEAKER_01:

And little that's just a small little thing, it just makes a same walk more interesting. Or do you listen? Do you have earbuds in, or do you have you remember? So sometimes I do and sometimes I don't. So when I do not have earbuds in, I'm 120 50% more creative because I'm killing time.

SPEAKER_00:

If not listening, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

If I'm listening to something, then um obviously I'm much more focused on the thing I'm listening to. But if I'm listening to music, I can be medium creative. Same. Yeah, yeah. Because my brain will continue along. Um, but that's super small. And I also think like other small ways to be curious in your life is again meal, like when you're preparing what you're eating. Like some people meal plan and they're very rigid, like structured in their way. It will not surprise you that I do not meal plan. No, but I'm a pretty creative cook. You are actually very creative. Whatever, I got this. I can I and I enjoy that. That I enjoy just going, oh well, I'll figure this out today. Sure. Like right now, as we speak, there is a pot of stock on my which was not part of my plan when I woke up, but I just decided to do that. Yeah, I love that about you in my first two hours. Yeah. So I'm like, I'll do that.

SPEAKER_00:

Um where I cooked chicken breasts two days ago, and that's what I'm eating all week. Yes, which is also I mean, there's variety in what am I gonna do with saying chicken breasts because now I'm sick of it. Um tonight I'm doing quesadillas if anybody's interested.

SPEAKER_01:

Um you already know that now. I already know that. I have not even had lunch yet.

SPEAKER_00:

Like the other thing, it's so funny. Uh, last because we probably need to wrap up at some point. Um, we could just keep talking, but um, and I don't know if this has anything to do with it, but the same with meal planning. Like, I admire, you know, some people who say they dress the same way every day so that they don't have to think or waste energy in certain things. So it's like, or or you can redirect, waste is the wrong way. You can redirect energy in other ways. So I think the underestimation is how difficult it is to redirect that energy. So it's like just being um real with yourself to say, I'm this type of person and I need help in this area, um, too, because I want to be more, I want to grow in this area, attach yourself to things that allow you to be more curious. Not everyone's built the same way.

SPEAKER_01:

You know what I think our homework, I love that. And you know what? I thought as you're talking, and like this, I think we need to have like a part two out of this. Maybe we need to assign ourselves, like, okay, over the next month, a pay attention to places where we could be more curious or nervous to be curious, yeah, and then just start and give ourselves kind of like we need to do five things we've never done before in our regular life. Like, I like that. So when you're in like, so what would happen if you did your workout in the night instead of in the morning? Like, what would you do?

SPEAKER_00:

See, already I'm getting anxious about that. Like, I mean, what then what would my morning be? But I love that. I think we should do that. Like, I I could use that. I I also appreciate the need to shake things up every so often because your body responds to because when we hiked in the morning, you're like, I can't because I'm doing my workout.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm like, but the hike could be your workout, and you're like, But I've already walked, I still did my regular walk.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, I had the I had a dog, so I had to do that. But you're right for me to like get myself out of it. But my answer is like, yes, I will do that.

SPEAKER_01:

So those okay, so we'll try to um maybe we shake up our more like and maybe for me, more curious is actually putting in more routine, which is not comfortable for me. But that doesn't mean it's wrong. Like, I should probably try. Like, what if we flip-flopped? What if I tried to do it? Oh my god, and you did live.

SPEAKER_00:

Let's not get crazy, Anne Marie. Just try it for good. But I do like the idea. Let's try to be curious. Let's do top three, three things in our daily routine, which you don't three things we're gonna decide to do differently. Yeah, it doesn't have to be routine. It's routine, it can be anything that you do.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. Okay. There's we've got to figure that out. And that and and those different things may spark an experience that then when we go back to, well, what are the new and different ways we can spend our time? 100% it will. It might be like, ooh, I really liked trying that class, or I really like those people, and I would like to do more of that.

SPEAKER_00:

Yep. So, okay, and we'll 100% do that because that is what we know is that it's the fear of and it's the just starting and the doing. But once you're in it, you're like, oh, this was such a good decision, most of the time.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay, I'm in. We have we'll kind of loop back on that, and and and I'm also gonna confirm then I know it's big magic, but I'm gonna confirm if it's a curious or creative, and I'm gonna read it again. I'm gonna read it again.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, I'll read it again, too. I'm just finishing her current book, so um. Oh, the one she just came out with. Yeah, it's it is it is amazing. Uh it's big magic. Creative living beyond fear. So you were right. No, that's okay.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, I was no, I was incorrect, but I corrected myself.

SPEAKER_00:

You could that's what I meant. You corrected, you knew that it was a switch from that. Um creative life.

SPEAKER_01:

That's not something people often say, seek.

unknown:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, so that's it. Look for that, Elizabeth Gilbert. But I am currently reading her um Take Me to the River. Oh, yeah. Or all the way to the river. Anyway, um, and it is amazing. It is um dark and um terrible, but it also has you kind of rethink everything and flip everything around you, and then it's beautiful in the end. Like it's just there's it is the darkest I've I've read from her.

SPEAKER_01:

Okay. Maybe we'll make a note we should talk about books at some point, which makes me happy as you know. I love it.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I think that would be a great one. Okay, Anne Marie, good talk. Hopefully, everybody else enjoyed it.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, we didn't even talk about like stepping and shit on the path on the path either. We didn't talk about that. All right, okay. Well, I hope everyone has a curious and creative day. And um, what are you having for lunch? Do you already know? Yes, chicken breast.

SPEAKER_00:

I think I'll do my quesadilla for lunch and then do a chicken salad. Shocking.

SPEAKER_01:

For dinner. Good. It's good, it's okay. It's a foundation, it's good. I have similar plans, so it's fine. I'm not that creepy.

SPEAKER_00:

Something brilliant with chicken with stock. Not that wacky. All right, Anne Marie. Have a good one. Thanks, you too. Bye. Bye. If you felt this one, share it. Because what's left isn't left, it's everything.

SPEAKER_01:

I don't do it again. I'm like, Bye, it's very good.