Living Left

Menopause and Hormone Havoc

• Ann-Marie Burton, Tanya Garcia • Season 2 • Episode 2

Share episode

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 47:28

We strip the whispers from menopause and perimenopause, connect symptoms women often carry alone, and share how misread science fueled years of misdiagnosis. We offer language, tools, and momentum to help you advocate for care at home, at work, and in the doctor’s office.

• Defining the one-day menopause and the long perimenopause
• Why HRT fear took hold and what newer evidence shows
• Symptoms across mood, sleep, weight, cognition, and pain
• Misdiagnosis, antidepressants, and the case for individualized care
• Open-minded solutions from HRT to strength training and protein
• Real timelines of early menopause and heavy cycles
• Brain fog, focus strategies, and self-compassion
• Workplace realities, policy ideas, and leadership empathy
• Using community to filter info and find credible experts
• Upcoming guests on sleep, stress, musculoskeletal changes, and supplements

If you felt this one, share it. Because what’s left isn’t less, it’s everything.

Follow Living Left for bold conversations by women for women on business, creativity, and comeback energy.

Find us on Instagram @living_left_​​

Because what’s left isn’t less. It’s everything.

SPEAKER_01:

This is Living Left, the raw space where we redefine success, purpose, and identity through honest, unfiltered conversation. We're navigating business, family, change, chaos, one left turn at a time. It's not about finding what's next. It's about owning what's left. Join us and let's go there. Hi, Tanya. Hello, Anne-Marie. We're we have a big topic today. We do have a big topic today. Big topic that we were like, we need to talk about this because it's got some sort of like connection or theme into like every conversation we have with women of our age in our friends' groups and at work and all the things. And it seems to be feeding our algorithms in every social media as well, to the point where I almost feel like I can't talk about it, but I need to talk about it. So we're gonna give everyone a hint. It starts with the letter M and it's not mother. Or it could start with P. It could start with P, but it really starts with M.

SPEAKER_00:

It really starts with M.

SPEAKER_01:

Menopause.

SPEAKER_00:

Menopause. Perrymenopause, but peramenopause, which is the the real crap of it all. No, it is all crap. It is, but I mean we know that menopause is literally one day. So actually, it's not that.

SPEAKER_01:

So, okay, so I'm gonna just say something right now. So correct, menopause is fine. So there's the decade prior to menopause, the day approximately eight to ten years. The one day that marks one year of not having a period is the day of menopause. Well, then what are we calling the post-menopause then? Exactly that post-menopause.

SPEAKER_00:

But you're right, it's all under menopause. Let's not get it. I would say menopause is yes, it's one day, and then after that, it's your life after. But the topic is menopause. I'm sure our listeners were wondering when we would finally have that discussion. I'm sure they're waiting with bated breath. With bated breath. Oh, yet another topic.

SPEAKER_01:

They're waiting, sweating, sweating in tank tops in the middle of January. Yes. With anger and frustration in their life and reaching out to their female friends and wondering when are we gonna talk about it? So what's Tanya and Anne-Marie's take? At least they know they'll get a few laughs.

SPEAKER_00:

Okay, yes, we need to talk about it. And so as non-experts, well, actually, actually, real life experts. So we are experts because we're both going through it in different ways.

SPEAKER_01:

So that's that's the term lived experience. Lived experience. I'm just gonna note the time because last episode, we apologized, we went on for way too long. It was an hour over New Year's Eve, yes, or New Year's resolutions. It's probably could have been a shorter one. This one I feel could go on for seven years, just very amount of oz does, but we won't go on for seven years. Well, I'm gonna mine the time so it's okay. So I think so. I just before I got on, I said to you, uh, oh my gosh, I needed a few minutes because I needed to get my my calendar in my mind for my own personal experience because I I think that I have underplayed, I have underplayed you 100% experience. Yes, and I definitely experienced the majority of this before this became such a hot topic in the news. Yes, and so I think I have been misdiagnosed for almost two decades. You and most women out there. Yes, sadly. I little did a little track here for myself so that because I don't actually think about it because I'm like, it's just life. But I'm I think we should put our little experiences, just explain first and start from there. Sure. Because I think what's getting was in the news right now in this day and age in 2026, is a lot of talk about about solutions for perimenopause and menopause. So a lot of HRT, a lot of positive recognition, people are actually talking about it and getting solutions. Still, it's not solved by any means. But more so management of symptoms. I would say, which is gonna come pretty darn close to solutions. It's not like yeah, yeah. But that was not maybe the situation even three years ago.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes, and we all know that. We don't need to explain why women said that. Okay, maybe not. I yeah, maybe I make the assumption that, you know, at a very high level, while why our mothers, the women before us, why our daughters will benefit from this, is because the women prior to us were, I will use the term robbed of some of the um things that could not only make their symptoms better, but also outcomes of you know, the effect of lower estrogen, uh, could minimize some of those effects because there was a study that was done that has now been debunked, debunked. Thank you for the word, um, that there was a uh direct correlation or a cause of cancer. So as a result, any woman or any idea of hormone replacement therapy was removed. Um, and since then, and again, we we know in all things, like we could get into the whole um system and why most studies done throughout the years are done, you know, based on men, physio, male physiology, et cetera. But it's now more and more knowing that things like dementia, Alzheimer's, et cetera, there is a reason why women are affected more in some degrees than others because the lack of estrogen is a real problem. So now it's been debunked, and now we're like a component of it.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, that's one component.

SPEAKER_00:

But one component, but in essence, if you wrap around it, that's the issue. As we get older, our hormones, it's estrogen is a core factor, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Like we lose the estrogen, it's causing us a lot of everything, a thousand problems, which we'll talk about, like yes, weight gain, mood, physical issues, yeah, brain fog, yeah, cognitive issues, all of that is connected to the decrease in estrogen.

SPEAKER_00:

Yep.

SPEAKER_01:

A generation before they were given estrogen, there was a rise in perceived breast cancer, they took everybody off of it. Yeah, then we were raised by theories that you do there's no solution. And by the overarching theme of it's getting older, and these are things that happen. Yeah. So you just need to put some weight on. You're going to have creaky knees, you're going to be like there's loads of jokes. Like, why are there so many terrible mother-in-law jokes? Probably because those mother-in-laws have been not feeling well for decades. Yes, for sure. Anyway, so so now we're coming to the realization, and also it's the internet generation where we also are all able to share and talk, and also I think we're removing some stigma around medication medications and all that, so it's all coming together. Yep. But I am so I'm a 76 baby, so I'm gonna be 50 this year, and the average age for menopause, I think, is 55. I think that's about the average age of the date that you've not had a period for a year, a year. So my I was 45 when I hit that. So that's an entire decade earlier than the average. So 45 was the date of my last period, and I was just doing some math. So here's my quick schedule. So and again, it's not only about your period, but your period is kind of a good track. Yeah, 100%, right? So 12, totally average, got my first period. Then you went that far back. I went well back just because I was like, well, actually, how many years did I have a normal period? Very little, actually. Yeah, me too. I was irregular, I was irregular. Actually, always was irregular, but that's yes, beside the point. 29 had the first baby, 31, next one, 34, last baby. Never had a normal cycle after that last baby. Yeah, and so then I was like, okay, so if 34 and then 45 was when the show is over, yeah, then that's 11. So I was like, wait.

SPEAKER_00:

Did you have natural births? No, I had three C sections. So that's also because sometimes when people have surgery or whatever, it really gets yes, yes, I've heard that. Okay, I'm not a doctor no one. So you can all debunk, you can all debunk that stuff, but most people who go through some serious physical, whether it's surgery, usually it's a removal or some. I mean, I'm not saying your your ovaries or anything, but yes, when you're there's a sickness, there's a surgery, there's a major body thing. And I don't know if this is true, but I asked that question because that's where these are two lay people just telling you their experience. You had a C-section, therefore, I would love to know if there's data on that. That if you had a C-section, you have a higher chance of going through perimenopause faster. It's just like no idea.

SPEAKER_01:

I have but I believe I'm right in some degree about surgery. Go if that's true, then my wonderful doctor who I love and who has been my doctor since I was 25, yeah, who was there for three C-sections, then if that's true, you would think at some point a flag would have gone off in the next no, that's not not at all. So so here's my video. They didn't even know. So they're from 34 to 40, like let's just say it was like disastrous.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Like, like I had periods, but they were like, Yeah, I remember someone's talking about the floods, and I had never heard that term in my life. Right. And then I started to experience it and realize, oh, that's what this is what's happening. Yeah. So, and then from 40 to 45, which also coincided kind of with some big changes in my life, major stress in my life, losing a parent, losing a business, COVID, all of that. And remember, 45, it's over. From 40 to 45, I'd have between like three and eight cycles a year, maybe. And some years I would be like, oh, I'm done at 32 or at uh 42, and then it would come back. Come back. So it was random. But anyway, so 45, totally done. And so now I'm 49. So I don't know my period, but all the other symptoms that we still like some of them have gotten better, but some of them have. So that's when I said, What's the post? Because the postmenopause is still like all the symptoms that we hear women talk about, which is a lot of it is mood related. Weight is a big issue for me.

SPEAKER_00:

But that's also a lot of parry. Like, I believe the same. My thing is it continues the stuff from parry. Yes, but it should get better, should get better. Like they do say like post-menopause over time. Yeah, we're not doing saying that. I'm just want to know doctors in a post-menopausal state, it's not supposed to be forever, but it's could technically be another 10 years, from what I know. But uh, my my understanding, and this is where we need an expert, is it does get better. So for you, what I find is interesting is so you would have been unaware of your paramenopause because they didn't even know. And you also maybe were, you know, a bit younger. So sometimes it didn't feel it didn't flag at all, right? And you're raising small kids, and none of us are sane, like we don't know what's happening, we're just trying to survive. So if you're experiencing that stage of your life and paramenopause, it would make sense that you're not tracking, and then you're in postmenopause, where you know you're having some symptoms, but maybe not to the degree, like so. I'm in a completely different track than you. I am still in paramenopause. I am in your I'm I get my period every month on the dot. I didn't when I was younger, but once I had kids, that all just sorted itself. Um, but now I'm in the stage of like, it's like someone's dying and I've committed a murder in my bathroom. Like it's like, so I'm familiar with that. You're familiar. So like I'm heading into, so now I'm doing the things because I have that information to be on hormone replacement therapy, et cetera. But I can feel it. So the difference with me, I think because I don't have kids and I'm so I know my body, like the moment I started kind of feeling change, I knew that was almost three years ago. And I was right in my doctor's office going before even really I knew anything about paramenopause, because three years ago, we still, it wasn't really as no common. I was like, there's something wrong. Like I know my body, and something shifted like literally overnight. That's how it felt. Um, and then sure enough, it's paramenopause, and it's all of the things.

SPEAKER_01:

All of the things I think most people are not as um paying as close attention and are actually, and this is the thing I that upsets me about this decade or two decades, is I think women are harder on ourselves and we shame ourselves for I'm not feeling myself because that's the biggest description. I don't feel like myself. I don't feel like myself. I can't put my finger on it exactly, but I'm I'm snappier, I'm not as I don't feel as resilient, I'm I'm not feeling as energetic, I'm what is it? And and we blame ourselves and we try to change the circumstances around us, not understanding that actually it's inside of us and it's not our fault.

SPEAKER_00:

It's not, I'm totally just thinking about something. What like I literally perimenopause ended my marriage.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, so I it didn't end my marriage, but isn't that funny? I just tracked it three years. It's not funny at all. It's completely a lie. That is why. No, it's the you're not the only person. No, I know that, but I'm laughing because I'm surprised I never thought of that.

SPEAKER_00:

I never thought of that. Oh, I've thought of that. No, I know, but I was like, you know, it wasn't three years, but I called, I I pulled the cord because that's funny.

SPEAKER_01:

Because women in this stage have less patience, less patience for garbage around us, and so we start essentially metaphorically and and literally house cleaning. Yeah, we start house cleaning the stuff out. So the toxic people, the talk toxic toxic jobs, because we're all trying to figure out why do I not feel as good as I used to feel, and so and so you start to evaluate what's around you. So it's not uncommon for people to leave relationships or to remove houses or to leave a job.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, mentally, I think then for me it happened sooner than the physical because the physical was after, but the mental I was definitely there.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, change the job, yeah. But you see all these women who I think for years we've been misdiagnosed. So, like, oh, you're feeling like your mood is off. Like, oh, so many women are prescribed antidepressant antidepressants who actually now should be given hormones. Hormone replacement therapy, yeah. But instead, they're left feeling like that they have a mental illness, yeah, and instead they have a hormone issue or the weight gain that you just cannot get a hold on. Like I feel like for years it was always like, oh, and you're decades, the older you get, the harder it is to lose weight, which is true, but it's actually not the decade, it's actually the hormone, the amount of hormone you have. Exactly. So, okay, yeah. So when you turn like the big zero, like 40s, harder than your 30s and your 50s, and it's actually the amount of estrogen you have in your body that actually impacts or that it drives up cortisol, which makes it worse. So, like it's it's just finally we're talking about these things, and we are gonna, we're gonna actually have guests on this podcast as we kind of allude, because we're not experts, but we have a uh couple friends that are gonna come talk to us about stress and sleep in this age, our bodies, maybe supplements, that kind of stuff. Because I think we're I don't have any solutions, although I'm very happy that my friends are getting recognition and diagnosis that I did not have. And I have jumped on the HRT train that I think everybody is on now, because now they're saying the research is that you should take HRT before in perimenopause, like 10 years before and 10 years after. So I'm in the streets.

SPEAKER_00:

The women before us, the women before us will be taking H like it will start in the 40s as it should be. 100%.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, as it should. Yeah. Yeah. But like when you talk about like your bone density and your mental, like your cognitive awareness, when I start to was like, oh, I'm way behind, so I guess I don't need this. And then it was a good friend of mine who, you know, was saying, Well, you're gonna break your bones and you're gonna lose lose your mind, and Alzheimer's is greater.

SPEAKER_00:

Just like Yeah, I think you know, I'm sitting here thinking of this, like, you know, if I just think of the value of let's say this podcast and our our point kind of with this topic, right? Because again, yes, maybe there's some people who who of our listeners who maybe don't know this stuff, but I think most people are aware.

SPEAKER_01:

No, I don't think so. I think you're incorrect. I think most people still don't know. Maybe in our circles they're talking about it, but like I just talked to a very good friend who's the same age as me who's new zero, zero about it.

SPEAKER_00:

Zero. That's shocking to me. So great. So if that is this is helping, then that's amazing. Um, but I think more uh the the next level of it, you know, if we talk about kind of what's the left turn, et cetera, I think most of the discussions I'm having is is is yeah, less in the awareness part and more in the education as to just keeping an open mind, because a lot of the discussions, what I think exists is if there is an idea of menopause, paramenopause, HRT, whatever, there's an immediate like, nope, nope, no, you can't take that. That's scary. Like you shouldn't do that. Like it's all false, right? Like that, those are more of the discussions I'm having with women who haven't gone who think they shouldn't take it. Yeah, who are still hearing and and all that. But it's hard to get a prescription. Well, that's where I was going. Yeah. So it's because the discussions and when you go in, it's still met with um hesitancy, hesitancy and caution. And I mean, I just had a discussion with my physician and I was shocked, and she is fairly progressive. I actually like her. Um, and I could see the caution and even some of the words that were coming out of her mouth around the idea of weight gain, and even that aspect was shocking to me, like as a female physician. I was like, are we still having this conversation? So, what I want, you know, people to maybe take out of this is at the very least to keep an open mind around, and it's not just HRT, right? Like it's all of the other things that you can do, whether it's medicine, whether it's um activity, et cetera, that you should be doing and advocating for um to ensure that you manage it. It's an entirely different view on what we've been made to believe is in our control that actually is not in our control. Yeah. Physically, like physiologically not in our control. Um, not to say that you should be like, you know, eating McDonald's and not managing your stress and not managing like within reason, most women I think probably more than men, would be active in managing. We're the ones who go to the doctors, we're the ones who are getting the paps.

SPEAKER_01:

We're the ones I think a lot of women don't to look after themselves because we're busy doing so many other things. We're busy. Looking after everyone else's health.

SPEAKER_00:

And so as a result, though, so there's two things here. It's the education awareness part. Because you're managing everybody else's health, you are farther advanced than like how many people still make flipping appointments for their husband's dentist or doctors? Like, so you're right. Because you're busy, you may be ignoring it. But I would say that on a scale of awareness and understanding, the female gender is we have been taught as little girls because of our periods, because of our issues, to at least be aware. I think the biggest challenge is we've been taught that you've said to it's just you just deal with it. Or it's not true, you don't deserve that, because you could be doing something more and better. You are in control. That's the point I'm trying to make. Yeah. So I'm saying whatever you hear now about whether it's HRT, whether it's um, you know, I'm gonna say it, whether it's a GLP one like an Ozempic or something that would maybe help you manage these symptoms, just don't say no, not for me. Just keep an open mind because that is, I think, the biggest aha, that it is actually less in our control than we thought.

SPEAKER_01:

We're all fixing this generation that the the the problems are less in our control, but the solutions, if you're advocating, I suppose, are in your control. Like so we have a I have a little I have a book club, and it's interesting. Now it's turned it we all joke that it's turned into like a menopause support group. And it's in and every person has a different story about their HRT discussion with their doctor. Some walk right in, it's no big deal. Yeah, many have to go back and ask. I had to go back and ask twice. Yeah, same. Yeah, like it's not a solution. The other big thing that I have been thinking a lot about, and we're in a privileged situation because we work for ourselves and we work remotely, but how much that this topic of life change, like physical life change, menopause decade or so. How now that we're all running the world, how this is finally coming into the discussions in a workplace. I love this. Yes. I think that that is a big topic. When you have 50% of your workforce who finally, finally, we're still behind, but we're finally leading, right? We're in positions of power, and these women from the inside out possibly falling apart.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes.

SPEAKER_01:

And where, you know, generations before, and it's also where the first generation, I was reading something about this, we're the first generation to be because we're older, so our children are in a younger situation and we've been working longer, we have younger children at home when we're going through this phase of life. So we're still very much mothering and in full family situations, and we're in senior roles professionally, and we're going through this change of life. Where if you kind of think back, if 55 is the average, then you know, those used to be grandmothers rolled up in her rocking chair dealing with this.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Where she didn't have children at home, she just had her groachy spouse she had to deal with. That was it. So now we are still very full load. Reactive. We're still can holding a very full load at the same time as going through a very demanding physical change.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Which is so policies and social circumstances are in the process of changing that, but not dramatically, right?

SPEAKER_00:

No, we're still very far away. But to your point, I agree. I'm really happy that um we are seeing more and more companies, and you know, usually smaller businesses are independent, but no, I think probably some at a corporate level who are changing policies, who are allowing for days, who are allowing for flexibility, who are acknowledging that it's not and it's and and positioning that it's not just a benefit to women, it's a benefit to their team and the men included in the workplace, or the men who have women at home. Like this is an every this is not just a female issue.

SPEAKER_01:

And I think that's you know, that's the and just some empathy and understanding. Like I have a friend who's a senior level executive who was on a stage, yeah, yeah, a massive hot flash, like absolutely ripping hot flash. Yes, and she was like, it was so embarrassing. I'm standing on a stage and I'm not nervous, I'm literally having a hot flash. Then I've had stories of friends who are in boardrooms and the flesh. They get up, yep. They stand up and they're like, Oh my god, like I need to get a sweater to wrap around my waist and get out of here. Like, it's like you're back to you know, 12 years old, and that happened. I remember that happening to me. Oh, me too.

SPEAKER_02:

Don't we all we all have that story?

SPEAKER_01:

So you're like, Oh my god, this like and and although it has nothing to do with your professionalism, it feels it can feel unprofessional, which how ridiculous is that when it's a physical reaction, but it feels like you're unprepared or not professional and doesn't opinion guys. So I'm I'm trying so hard to be like ever, like, yeah, like there's so much to unpack with all of that.

SPEAKER_00:

Um I do think it's a really good point that um, and I think, you know, again, if you look at, you know, the challenge I would have for, you know, whoever might be listening. But like if you have an opportunity to affect change in your workplace or in your current environment, you know, I think I know you and I, we we tr we have those discussions a lot, and and we we can as business owners, but that's a big discussion is how do we support um in ways that we weren't supported, and not because you know our managers were terrible. It was just knowledge. Like when you know better, you do better. Like just we there needs to be a better way to um support women, uh always. It it just is very it's there's a big gap still across.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, even professionally for myself, like I don't know if we've never really talked about this part, but like like I have found that I am less focused and I already have some issues with focus. So, like so for me to stay focused, like this is a side effect of all of this. So, what some people are gonna call that brain fog or whatever. So that is what it is, yeah. So like to be less, yeah, I know, I know that's a term, but brain fog can mean like I have trouble remembering things, or it's not focused, or it can be that I lose my words, like there's lots of ways that brain fog looks like. So I've like had to make you know adaptations in my the way like I make lists or like the thousand reminders on my phone, or little things that I didn't have to do before, yeah. That now I have to do, like I've had to make little adjustments. So it's also I've never actually talked about that with anybody to say, like, oh if you're having a hard time remembering, have you tried this? Like, yeah, because you don't want to like you don't want to be rude and assume that everybody is going through the same exactly like why is that rude? Well, I don't want to like you don't want to be a person's problem, you know what I mean? Like, I don't want to reach into someone's personal life that's yeah, professional, especially in a work situation.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, and I think that's part of I think the change is the more that at the leadership level, like across the board, that people can like if you think about it, when you sign a job offer and there's a policy, right? There will be statements in black and white around, you know, bereavement or you know, maternity leave or whatever. There should equally be discussions around, you know, um, you know, menstrual days and or paramenopause or and the more that we can normalize those discussions, the more it feels less, to your point, it's silly like crazy that it feels less professional. It's not. You're a human being. As equally as they talk about, you know, I didn't get a lot of sleep that night. I mean, you're not going into gory details, but that would be my hope, I think, by the time hopefully our kids, I just see the way my daughter talks about things. Like, you know, she talks quite openly about her physiological challenges as a woman, right?

SPEAKER_01:

Like that's such a good point. So, like hiding it. So, like what I love is now, and when you go into a bathroom and it's often like menstrual products are out and available and free to people, which is crazy. Yeah, which not crazy, that is good, that's good progress. Yeah. When I when I'm when I say the word crazy, I mean it's changed so much from what we grew up with. Like, if you talk about, yes, our kids, boys included, are talking about cycles. Like I grew up, I don't know, you had a sister. I I didn't have a sister, but like I was so we used to put the like the box of tampon, like that but that was not sitting beside the toilet. Like that must hidden away, must be tucked away, it must be wrapped up like nobody knows this is happening. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Do not discuss it. When you had to go to the bathroom at lunch at uh in high school, I'd shove it, you know, up like that too. Totally. No, you didn't want anyone to know, nobody talked about it. It was like this secret problem that you didn't want to admit was happening, and I think we've carried that into us gen X. There was a took we've carried that in life. So like nobody was really talking about the problems we were having. It it honestly, if social media wasn't here, none of this would have changed. I don't know. Well, of course, yeah, yeah, 100%. I mean, or it would have been a lot slower. You're not talking over. I mean, change happens before digital, but it was would be a lot slower. That much? I remember honestly. Well, maybe my like I remember having my first baby being like in a baby group and kind of whispering to the girls around me, like, did you get your period back? Like, when is this supposed to come? Like, and they're like, Oh, well, you're breastfeeding, it's not gonna happen. Like, I had no idea that was other than being in the baby books, no one talked about probably wasn't, probably wasn't.

SPEAKER_00:

It was all the year supposed to come back, and then I mean, definitely the internet is a huge, yeah, huge um benefit and and has facilitated the change a lot faster than it would happen. Um, because I I remember having a conversation with someone who had younger children and we were talking about something. Um and and we're saying as when we were raising our kids, like we didn't know that. And they were like, Well, how did you not know that? I'm like, because there was no internet. She's like, Well, well there was a where else did you go? Not really, not really, like, not at the beginning. There was forum. Yeah. So if I have to, I can't, couldn't then or didn't know to get into the deep dives of symptoms of certain things with kids, right? You very much still, when we had children, 2000s, like you were still kind of I got all my information from the mom's town phone.

SPEAKER_01:

Sure.

SPEAKER_00:

But that's the point. Yeah, so that's the point I'm trying to make is yeah, we didn't really have that. And I think that's forgotten. Like now, yes, you just chat GPT, forget Google now. Like I know what is happening. Um, so I do think that's a uh a really good point. We really didn't know, and we really weren't talking about it. No. So I think we have to we have a responsibility, I think, as women of this age, quite frankly. Um, I'm very open. Like I am in groups of men and women. I will, as loudly as I talk about what I had for breakfast the next day, I will talk about menopause and paramenopause. And I see some of the, and I'm just like, we need to do that because you need to know you have daughters, for gosh sakes. Like you need, I'm not gonna get into the gory details, but I'm not gonna hide it. I'm not gonna hide it.

SPEAKER_01:

And I also think it doesn't negate us from personal responsibility. So we might be I might be grouchy on a certain moment, and I can't just label that with no hormones. Like that's as dismissive as the the age-old jokes about oh, she has PMS, and we're dismissing her because of that. However, there is truth.

SPEAKER_00:

There is a reason though. So like I agree, there's a difference between judging and dismissing. I agree, you shouldn't do that. But I think acknowledging that, like now I have very open discussions, like I'm about to have my, I know when I'm about to have my period. Again, I know my body extremely well. So I know, I know when my emotions are heightened, etc. And I will call that. I'm like, you just don't want to mess with me today. I need about 48 hours because we're going through this. But like it's not an excuse, it's just a reality. Like someone has a headache. I'll talk about your flipping migraine or your anxiety or your whatever all the time, but you can't talk about I'm about my hormones are out of whack. Like that to me is ridiculous. Like it should be equal. That's my thing. The conversation should be equal, the understanding should be equal. So I think that is our responsibility going forward because the more we're comfortable, our daughters will be comfortable. Um, and then their daughters will be comfortable. And that's just that's all we can really do.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

So who's our next guest? I know I want to be conscious of time.

SPEAKER_01:

So we're gonna talk about uh sleep and stress. Yeah. Because I know I know my sleep has been, I feel like I've gotten back on track the last couple of years, but um that was one of my core symptoms was unable to sleep through the night. I still can't disruptive. So we're gonna have Alana McGinn, who happens to be your sister. Uh people don't know.

SPEAKER_00:

Who is that?

SPEAKER_01:

Lovely human who's asleep and stress expert. So she's gonna chat with us about you know ways to get the sleep and just I and I think stress and cortisol we should discuss, maybe not with Alana, but maybe with. Um, and then we're going to have Dr. Ashley Warback on, who's going to talk to us about. So she's actually a really good friend of mine, but she's also my chiropractor. Nice. Um, like a lot of the changes that we have are related to hormone changes. So, like my stupid frozen shoulder. Yes, which is related, the angle that would not solve itself for three years. Now we're looking back going, oh, so that's completely connected to tissue and issues that are related to hormone changes. Um, so that was a problem for three. Like, so uh, we're just really interested in her practice. She's gonna have some interesting discussions, insights.

SPEAKER_00:

I think I think it's really just again, it's it's like connecting the dots for women, right? So to your point, when you went through chronologically, you're like, oh my gosh, yeah. It is it is absolutely connected. Like when anyone still questions that it's not connected, like yeah, 100%, it's not even 99.5. Yeah, 100% it's connected to your depleting hormones whenever that started. It just is, it just yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, so Ashley brought the movie, you know, the M Factor. Remember, there was um, which was not available to stream, so um individuals could bring that to viewing audiences. So actually, she brought it to Burlington, and it was watching that last year that made me realize in hindsight that oh my goodness, all these things that have been happening to me for a decade were connected, and I did not realize that. So she's got a lot of really interesting experiences and her own personal interest in menopause and those symptoms.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Um, and then we're gonna talk to someone about supplements and interest in like protein and magnesium and all the supplements and things that we should be focused on. Um, but we're not but in a conversational way, like we're not having like a official newscast worthy conversations. These are friends of ours who are in the space that we think, huh, maybe, maybe there's there's something that can help everybody with. Um I don't know what other things did. We talk about other things? No, that was it. It's just interesting. The whole thing's interesting. It just changes anything other than awareness if I look back. And I would take a shame away. I would take so much of the shame away.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, and I think the good news is is that inevitably is happening. We just it happened, it didn't happen when we were going through it because just it is growth, right? Like it's talk, there's more information out there now, and that means knowledge is what removes shame from the equation. But I think you know, the big takeaway is is we have to get more comfortable. Like as an individual, what can you do? A is to accept that it's all connected, B is to educate yourself. Like, yeah, there's no excuse anymore. Just Google menopause, paramenopause, like it's all there. Ask your other female friends. Like that would be how I, because there's so much information, it can be quite overwhelming. And there's also misinformation out there, too, as we all know. So I think the biggest way is to ask your female friends, those that you're comfortable with, to you know, send you information, send you people that they follow or doctors that they follow, books that they've read, um, and then advocate for yourself um at the doctor's office. And if they're saying, oh no, yeah, or actually, I don't get the oh no now. I just get the oh yeah. Like I get the yeah, yeah. You know, and I'm like, okay, yeah, but what is that's not acceptable to me. Yep, you're gaining weight. Yep, you're achy. Okay, but and then what?

SPEAKER_01:

You know, that's a good naturopath can help too, because a good nature 100%.

SPEAKER_00:

So whether it's your natural path. Yes, but then some people have access to that and other people don't necessarily have access to that. Yeah. So it depends, right? On you know, what you can do, what you can pay for, what you can go through privately versus publicly. But I think the more you advocate, I think um, even your general practitioner, your family practitioner, they're being educated at the same rate, if not more than we are, that it'll become less of a barrier. It'll just be part of the protocol with women.

SPEAKER_01:

Hopefully.

SPEAKER_00:

Hopefully, that's that's like did you even know it's ridiculous that and here, even as part of your path, like you can if you advocate and they do it, sure. But like there's certain things that you now have to start paying for. Yeah, which I know is ridiculous. But if you have a doctor who's progressive, they'll push it through anyway. So the ad advocating is important, and maybe saying no sometimes and saying, Is there another way? is important because it's ridiculous.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, there's a lot of and and I'm I'm gonna guess that most women are actually not taking nearly the care or attention. Like you're very good at like something happens. I dodge the doctor, I don't really go like that.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I don't like not within crazy. I have other friends and or family members that might be just a little bit more excessive than me, shocking. But I do, I am disciplined, shocking in. I do an annual physical. Always have. I don't care if it's every two years. I'm in there every year. I'm getting blood work every year. Like, I do it more like a, you know, we just talked about the word and resolutions. I do the same thing with my health. I start every year and I'm like, okay, where am I at? I was just there this morning, getting all my blood work. Like, what do I need to focus on? Does that align with how I'm feeling? I think that that's on the top end.

SPEAKER_01:

I don't think that's everybody.

SPEAKER_00:

No, I don't think so either.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm not disagreeing with that. I don't think it's excessive. I think you're doing it the right way. But I think you've put the right level of prioritization in there. And it also might be like if you go back to 10 years ago, were you doing that?

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I don't know. I can't even remember 10 years ago. I used to just do with the kids. Like honestly, that was my trick. There would be like the three. Three of us always. Dentists, all three of us went together. So I literally just followed the kids. So if the kids went for their physical, I just went for the physical. So you have the same doctor. Same doctor. So that's why I think that was how I managed it. Yeah. Like we all got the flu. So if if one of us didn't get the flu shot, all none of us were getting the flu shot as an example because none of us made it to the doctor. Like it was always just a trio. Yeah. No, it's a good, that was a good tip. It's kind of a nice little tip, but I mean we did have the same doctor, and they've known me since I was little. So maybe we're just in the system in a different way. Again, it's privilege of what you have available. But I'm looking forward to the upcoming guests.

unknown:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

And we'll keep learning things. I think that's great. Good chat. That's key. And I will say one little funny thing is a friend of mine put in a large group chat the other day just her progesterone pills in her book, in her hand. Oh, yeah, that she's taking. A little of discussion. And literally, I think we were all like, Yeah, I know what that is. That's awesome. See, I don't even I have to relook at mine.

SPEAKER_00:

Mine's I don't have separate progesterone pills, but that's one other day. No, mine is an all-in-one, which I'm still not a hundred percent sure because my doctor is so there's also a difference between if you're still on your period and you have your ovaries, and if you're not. So sometimes the prescription and the way in which they progress you is different. So I believe, and I would love other people to like text me and tell me, but I think for those of us who are still operating like every month, we're getting it, and it's they're more hesitant to because it's still in that not the 40-year-olds, like you're in perimenopause, but like your body is still kind of doing what it needs to be doing. Like I have a level of estrogen because I'm getting my period, right? Um, versus someone who maybe it stopped. I don't know. But they're just hesitant to like give me, give me the real shit, is what I want. Oh well, what everybody else do have the real shit. You just I do. I have it in a different format and a slightly lower dose, I believe. Who knows? So it's not really doing what I needed to do, but I mean, what do I know, right? You just kind of have to go through it's something, so I feel that's better than nothing.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, it's so keep talking to your doctor. You're in the dialogue and you're talking about it versus getting completely down the other path, which was where I was. Yeah, 100% like trying to solve other issues, which were not the issue, not the issue at all. No, I know, so anyway, all right. Well, go in peace.

SPEAKER_00:

Go in peace. Go in peace. Good luck. Paramount paramenopause on. Yeah, I don't know. Or menopause on. Thanks, Anne Marie.

SPEAKER_01:

I don't know what it is, but all I know is chronologically two years younger than you, but I'm like a decade ahead of you on the shit, which is unfair. So true and unfair.

SPEAKER_00:

Yes, I'm a I'm like 60.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm 50. I'm 60.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, I wonder if they have that age. You know how they have um yeah. I think I your age in like they just did it for like your Spotify thing or whatever. Okay, yeah, like I'm 60.

SPEAKER_01:

I think I'm 60.

SPEAKER_00:

Your actual women age based on symptoms. Yeah, I'm five years.

SPEAKER_01:

We should build that. It's not funny. I this is not actually, I don't like this conversation. This is not nice, but if I'm five years past, I average is 55, I'm 60, Tanya. Five. No, I'm not 65, I'm five years past the average. So five years past I'm having my period, and if the average, okay, 45. I'm not giving myself 65 for crying out loud. Like so, I'm 60.

SPEAKER_00:

So, what's your actual age in hormone in female hormone and biology? What's your actual age? That's terrible.

SPEAKER_01:

So I'm 60, maybe.

SPEAKER_00:

You're not the only one.

SPEAKER_01:

That makes me really mad. That makes me really mad. I know. So, but it's gonna be fine.

SPEAKER_00:

That's why your HRT will fix that. It's like, what are you in dog ears? What are you in hormone ears? Really? What is it? That's funny. We should build that up. That would be funny. Not funny, that'd be depressing.

SPEAKER_01:

It's depressing, yeah. And then they'll just give anyway.

SPEAKER_00:

That's like the idea of procreating at 50, but I see how people could do it. Like, I legitimately like sometimes. You could have a baby, yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, yeah, but you could sure I couldn't, at least. At least I couldn't for maybe a couple days. At least I couldn't, right?

SPEAKER_00:

Because you could not.

SPEAKER_01:

I'm um, I'm already a grandmother, apparently. Man, that's horrible. I mean, my hair is totally gray, like you can't tell today, but in a few weeks you will. Like, and so and I and actually I'm wearing new makeup for mature skin taking it. I bought a new makeup, that Laura Geller line put it on today because everything sinks in. Because I have old skin, I guess. Well, you have lines called and my ribs crack. Like, what's wrong? I've got to get off the phone. Your bones are an issue.

SPEAKER_00:

I'm feeling very annoyed. All right, well, let's go now play pickleball and see how that all serves us. Okay, we gotta end this. Okay, goodbye. Go in peace. Go in peace. If you felt this one, share it. Because what's left isn't less, it's everything.

SPEAKER_01:

Is that it? I just like to do it again. I'm like, why are you staring at it?