The Half Century Tour

We celebrate a 50th birthday that turns into a full-bodied look at friendship, effort, and what it means to be seen by your people. We also map how intentional gatherings and big trips can become a reset button for midlife joy and gratitude.

Follow Living Left for bold conversations by women for women on business, creativity, and comeback energy. 

Find us on Instagram @living_left_​​

Because what’s left isn’t less. It’s everything.

Transcript

Season Finale And Turning 50

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Hi Tanya. Hello, Emory. We're here for our final episode of this season. Crazy. Crazy.

SPEAKER_01 0:08

Working my new hat.

SPEAKER_02 0:10

I know. I know. Well, maybe we will keep going. We'll just call it season three.

SPEAKER_01 0:15

Yes. Yes. This season blew by. But yes, I love your hat. Should we describe for those people who aren't watching what your hat is saying?

SPEAKER_02 0:22

And what I don't know. I see it reverse, which would make the kids happy because it would say six, seven. Exactly. Six, seven. Six, seven. But it's actually seven, six. It is a cool hat. It is.

SPEAKER_01 0:35

Don't worry. The the the watchers can see it says 76. 7-6. What does that mean?

SPEAKER_02 0:41

It's my birth year. So it means that the 50th birthday is coming up in uh couple days. Yeah. Today's Monday, so Thursday. So yeah, it's here. It's here.

SPEAKER_01 0:53

Year 50. And that's what we're gonna talk a little bit about, right? We're gonna kind of um because you've you just kicked off this weekend. Yeah, I had the Was that like your first celebration, I guess. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:07

Yeah, like I had we had like over Easy Easter, we had a little cake with my family because there was extended family, and with the team we had a little quick little cheers, sort of. Yeah. Uh but no, that kicked it off. That kicked it off. So yeah, we had a pub crawl.

SPEAKER_00 1:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:24

The first pub crawl I've participated in for a long time. I think the last time I went on an official pub crawl was my brother's wedding, like a wedding shower-ish. So over 20 years ago. I mean, I've been to pubs, but I've not done a pub crawl. Although I do a pub crawl again, actually. In fact, I feel like we should have an annual one now.

SPEAKER_01 1:47

Yeah, I've been to several pubs in an evening. So I think it's a same idea, but not organized with a small group. Yeah. Um, but I realized how much I enjoyed that because the change of scenery, the change of vibe. But anyway, let's yeah. So what happened on so Saturday was your kickoff, and yeah, Saturday. You had many, many reflecting and surprises, and none of which I was surprised about, any of it, actually. Really? No, because I knew you were gonna be able to do it.

SPEAKER_02 2:20

I was surprised about lots of it. I was surprised, so it was not a surprise party. No, but my husband planned it, and there were like elements that I was I I didn't know about. Yes, and I gave him the list, which was about 50 people, because I was like, you know, when I was a kid, it's like you turned five, you can invite five friends. Oh, yeah, I did not have to be a five. So I was like, I'm turning 50. There's multiple groups in my life, and I wanted to be inclusive, and so I invited about 50 people. I think it was slightly more, but then a couple of years.

SPEAKER_01 2:53

Oh, it was more at one point for sure. I was counting.

SPEAKER_02 2:55

Oh, did you? I never counted.

SPEAKER_01 2:57

Yeah, we counted tables at one of them. Oh, that felt like it was a lot. You were over 50 for sure. Like, not like like tons of, but we hit 50.

SPEAKER_02 3:06

I didn't know, and I think, yeah, it was a group of us. We went to four different places in Burlington, and then it was a little big mixture of mashup of friends, which is my one of my favorite things

The Pub Crawl Kickoff Plan

SPEAKER_02 3:20

to do. Uh, it felt a little bit, I had moments of, and I don't know, you might have felt like this for your 50th when you urged a bunch of people.

SPEAKER_01 3:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 3:29

Is I felt like the last time I had that many worlds combining, well, maybe my 40th, but still not the same, but was my wedding. I felt like I felt it had like wedding-ish vibes to me. And the reason it felt like that is there was a lot of love exchanged and like a lot of communication before and after and during where it and it felt like a lead up, you know. When you have a wedding of like wedding showers and there's like exciting things, and I think as I had this party and then I'm going on this big trip, which you're part of, uh, so there's like this lead up to something, and so it felt like that to me. And I was overwhelmed in moments, I was very overwhelmed, like in a good way, like a positive. So, yeah, so to start the day, just so other people, so first of all, there was like a Google sheet with people had to sign up for places.

SPEAKER_01 4:23

We had to give indication of how many bars pubs would we be at, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:28

Michael was just trying to sort out seats and spots because he had to organize the places, which was a learning curve for him. He did not know, he thought we could all 50 people walk in.

SPEAKER_01 4:37

No, no, we would have been turned away. It and it was a Saturday, yeah. Like it was it was busy at all of the first place we went to had four parties that day.

SPEAKER_02 4:47

So that's why we started at 3:30. So we started at 3:30 to be at the front end.

SPEAKER_01 4:52

Makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 4:53

Uh, and so that was fun. But anyway, before that, even um I we started there was a group chat that came out of that started with the RSVP. And I guess Michael had asked people to introduce themselves, and they were and I sort of and but it was really quiet, like the group chat was quiet, which was making me a bit like it's like to me, it felt like everyone was in a room off to the side, like even though we weren't physically anywhere.

SPEAKER_00 5:21

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 5:22

To me, a quiet group chat makes me uncomfortable. I'm like, why isn't everyone talking? Why isn't everyone wanting to get to know each other? Because not everybody is me, but that's how I want to go in. So then I started posting introducing people and posting pictures and saying

Group Chat Intros And Friend Math

SPEAKER_02 5:35

it may give me a chance to introduce people and say my history with them and why I love them, which was lovely. Well, then I know it got to be a little bit too much because then it's like 50 people, it's a lot of messages and a lot of photos, but I was loving it, I was personally enjoying it, and it was making me happy. So even when there was a few little comments that there's this is too much, you were very good. Well, who said that?

SPEAKER_01 5:56

Well, okay, I don't think that there was maybe a couple of people said that. Maybe, like maybe your family. I I but like there was some teasing, sure. There's teasing is an entirely different scenario, I think. But I did share with you when I finally like I was again, it was a surgery in the week, so you're busy with work, but when you had time to like think and read through them, I went and shared and introduced myself. So I sent you a note because it was equally joyful for me, right? Because I was able to go through a few pictures. I wanted to like what story am I gonna tell? Um, so I needed you to know that. And I think that that's probably where most people enjoyed it. And then I think you agreed. Yeah, and I went made sure I went through it before the part the pub crawl, so I could kind of get a sense of people. I wanted to like try and figure people out. I I failed in most cases, but in a lot of a lot of times I was just familiar with faces, which was helpful actually.

SPEAKER_02 6:53

Well, that was my whole point. I wanted people to say, oh, you're Tanya, you work with Amy Ray, oh, you guys are doing this. Like, and I I think for some people who wanted to use that as a resource, they did. And it made me feel like I was not gonna be able to get around to talk to everyone all the time. So I like to introduce people and make sure they have a connection and they know. So that made me feel, but that there was a lot of love in that. So I found that emotional. And then I was emotional because I was going through pictures, which means you're going through pictures of your life, and there's a little bit of um reminiscing and like bittersweetness in that that you realize, wow, like a lot of time has happened, and you think something just happened, and you realize, oh, that was 12 years ago, or like also there's like a really lovely head in the sand that I think I look the same and I don't. Yes. Or I think I looked at it. You're like, oh god, I gotta look at what I look like, and I look, I actually think I look better than I did five years ago. But I'm like, but I'm looking at pictures and I'm like, oh my god, like I was walking around a lot heavier, a lot. I know, like I'm just like, oh gosh. But it's part of your life, it's your story. It's your story. Like, I was like, oh, I maybe I won't share that picture. And I was like, everyone knew you when you looked like that, Amory. So it doesn't, you should still share that. Yes, like okay, but it is amazing that you think, like my friend Jolene, great example. First friend in Burlington when I moved here. But I have never really thought, oh, I've known her for 20 years. I know. I think, oh, she's like newish. No, she's not.

SPEAKER_01 8:32

She's not 20 years. That's what I think is is interesting at 15. I'm sure it's more and more, you know, as as the years go by, is it feels like it's was just yesterday, but really wasn't. And then when you actually sit to think about how much time has actually passed, you're like, oh my gosh, what?

SPEAKER_02 8:48

And it made me go through the analysis. So because I'm a data nerd, I like to know this. I looked at the list and the list of people who were coming, not necessarily all the people who invited because some people couldn't come, but of the list attending, 25% of them I knew when I turned 30. So that's like your OG friends, right? Like your school friends, whatever. Then I got up to uh 50% of them, just over 50, say 55%. I knew at 40. So I was like, oh, I made a lot of new friends in that next decade. I moved to this town, I had kids. And then, but then there was maybe it was higher, actually, might have been a little closer to the because I didn't just make 50% in the last 10 years, but then it was higher. I feel like it was higher, maybe 60% I knew at 40. And then 40 were new. Yeah. So I was like, but that also reminds you, which we've podcasted on this topic. We have. You can make new friends, and you should. And if you were relying on the originals, that would be only 25% in the room.

SPEAKER_01 9:52

Like, look at how many more stories and experiences you had as a result. Absolutely. Like when you were telling me those numbers, it proves, and I think it was one of our first podcasts, as you know, we talk about you know, midlife women and and what do we do? It's and it's never too late. Like, whether you even reconnect with old or and but more so, you know, new lives, new experience, new stories help you grow as a human. And I think you were fully feeling that in that room, right? Like they they are a reflection. That room is a reflection of the whole being you are, like that's really what it is. And I I believe that so strongly, as you know, uh, and have had for years. And that's I'm so glad you had that experience. I had that same experience of 50, like with my 50.

SPEAKER_02 10:42

So I could, I feel like that chart is over there. I think I might have thrown it out, but now I want to know the numbers for sure. But it was high, yeah. And then it also, this is where I get kind of emotional thinking about it, because I was like, I feel real like the word blessed is so overused, but I was like, I never used that word, but I'm like, yeah, like it's gratefully, I'm like, huh. Because also I feel like blessed happened to you. And I'm like, no, I made this happen. Yes. I'm grateful for myself for being in the right place or making those connections and investing in that because I do feel for many years as a busy wife and mom that I for many years was saying I wasn't investing in myself. I was investing in my family, which I was, but I'm like, wait a second, I hung on to some of the tenants of that time, like the people stayed around, and that I was investing in my, I was investing in our family, but I was investing in connections. Yeah. I was proud of myself at the end of it.

SPEAKER_01 11:42

I was like, You should be that it is a testament to, I mean, we were just talking about this before the podcast that our biggest lesson we try and share forward with our kids, and they experience it in different ways. So, and others is you know, life, what you put in is what you get out. Like, you know, some people are godly and they talk about God and whatever. I'm always talking about the universe, I talk about energy flow, I have felt it, I know it. It is proven you know it too. And and Saturday was a really great example. You're right. Like, you can say blessed. I always say grateful because I feel the same way. I don't this life happens, doesn't happen to you. It no, what is it? Happens for you.

SPEAKER_02 12:24

Well, the point you need to take action. The action, you need to take it.

SPEAKER_01 12:26

Yeah, but there's a saying that life doesn't happen to you, life should happen for you type thing or something. But anyway, the point is you have to put everything you put in, you will get back. So when you have a moment like, I don't give a shit if it's your 50th, your fourth, whatever it is, when you can just feel and see and witness the product of that time and investment. And I just think also I was so proud and happy for you to see that your fan, your your kids saw that. Like my kids were at mine too, and that was really important to me, so that they saw as Laura was very emotional.

SPEAKER_02 13:07

Yes, she was like, Oh, they feel it, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:12

And I have girlfriends now who want to do that and create something their kids will see. But I remember talking to Lauren, she was very emotional about it.

SPEAKER_02 13:20

She was and I think because every well, there was lots of reasons for emotion, I think. But yes, and and it layered, like so. Again, just to keep more iconic. So I also woke up in the morning. So so this party was happening. The Friday night, my university kids returned home. Well, one came home and one came home Saturday morning. So, like all of a sudden, then we were a full house, which again also throws the dynamic off, but is super exciting. Like, it's like you're waiting for Christmas, like everyone's coming home. Yeah, and I wake up in the morning to the group chat, and my brother has made one of his epic playlists. Yes, amazing. Like, and I was like, I gotta get this on, like the speaker in the house. And people were waking up, so I'm like, okay, I gotta wake them up. I'm gonna put the speaker.

The Photo Surprise And Big Feelings

SPEAKER_02 14:05

So I I put it on, and the YouTube song. So I'm I'm in my pajamas at the top of the stairs. I open the stairs, and this the U2 song is on, I forget which one, but it was beautiful. It's like all instrumental at the front. So it's like a beautiful, it's on loud, and I go down the stairs, and there's this you need to come and see this in person 10. You just have to come, yeah. So leave it out forever. Imagine people all the way down my stairs, is like a jute rope with all these pictures with clothespins on. And I'm emotional because I see whatever, it's like 20 pictures lined up. And I'm like, oh my gosh, I see these pictures. I look down my staircase. There's my husband at the bottom, are looking crying, already emotional as I'm coming down the stairs in my jammies, and I was like, Oh, this is so nice. And I just gonna put context. He's a lovely human, he does a lot for me, but he's never surprised me in 28 years. He's not like he does, he's not demonstrative in a surprising way. And he did it then. He stepped, he surprised me. But here's the thing 20 pictures. I go down, I give him a hug, I turn in the hallway. There's another two ropes. I turn to look in the dining room, big blown up 50, big thing on the table, another one. Family room, another one. Go into the kitchen, all across the windows. Like, I don't know how many ropes there is, like at least 10. At least 10. Pictures on all the tables, on all the counters. Everywhere is there pictures of highlights, yeah. He still has 150, he said, in a box that didn't even make it out.

SPEAKER_01 15:43

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 15:44

And it took me, and it I was over, like I was so to because it's your whole life in front of you, which is um it's emotional to see. Um like beautiful moments that as a parent, also often the time you orchestrated those moments. Yes, you likely did it. You probably oh, there's a great picture of you camping, and it's a beautiful moment, but you know all the work that goes into that moment.

SPEAKER_01 16:16

Into creating that moment, totally.

SPEAKER_02 16:20

Oh, there's a kid with the birthday cake. Okay, who baked it, who planned the party, who did the thing. So it's all these moments of like cumulative effort and your love on display that you pour your love into the moment, and then there's his picture, and I just it see, I'm getting emotional as talking. Of course, as you should. He organized it. One's like all with my dad, one's all with my mom, one with my brother. Like, these are this kid, like there's not there's only one of you. And I was like, Where is Tanya in the pictures? He's like, he's like, I ran out, he's like, I ran out of space.

SPEAKER_01 17:03

Because I was at the tail end of your life. I have I'm only in the last 10 years.

SPEAKER_02 17:07

He's like, I have a whole left turn pile, it didn't make it.

SPEAKER_00 17:10

That's okay. That's all right.

SPEAKER_02 17:11

But I was like, because once I realized there was a theme, I was like looking for the themes.

SPEAKER_01 17:17

That's all right.

SPEAKER_02 17:18

Um, but he's like, I have so many, I have so many. But then it became emotional, and then a kid comes down, then they're emotional, everyone, and then everyone is like sitting having breakfast with all these around. Oh, remember this time we're reminiscing the whole day, which was beautiful.

SPEAKER_01 17:34

So what you would everything.

SPEAKER_02 17:36

I would have been like, this was happy. And then we and then we all get ready, and then we go out, and then I see people for my whole life, like yeah, so great. It was genuinely the perfect day, the perfect answer.

SPEAKER_01 17:52

So the next time someone says to you, I don't know that I'm gonna do anything for my 50th or whatever, your answer is gonna be you should. Yeah, like do what you want to do, but everyone who's listening, everyone deserves it. And it is okay. I want you to also talk about so A, that was everything you received, but you equally love the fact that you had the opportunity to also tell everyone how much you love. Talk about that. Like that's I think people forget it. It's not just about you receiving everything, like that's amazing, but it is equally your opportunity to show and tell people you love them too, which I don't think we get we we do enough in in the most meaningful ways, it can be taken for granted, right?

SPEAKER_02 18:43

Yeah, but I just in the mostly in the in that chat, I kind of as I introduced people, I wanted to highlight how do I know you and when did I first meet you or what did you do that was remarkable. Yeah, and I can tell that to you, but and to me, and maybe it's because I'm words of affirmation, that's sure. Love language, yep. Uh, I want to tell you in front of other people so they can know also how amazing you are.

SPEAKER_01 19:08

Yeah, 100%.

SPEAKER_02 19:09

Or what you do that's so special. Yeah. Um but I think that had again, I feel like I'm tooting my own horn here, and I'm not intending to do it like that. Like I'm I'm literally just raving about the people in my life and how lucky, like it's just but you should take pride in in if you use the word from Michael, curated the life that you did.

SPEAKER_01 19:35

Right, which is probably your word.

SPEAKER_02 19:38

Well, I I don't know if I've exactly said that, but I mean you actually you tell he did a speech. You say what your take was on it, actually, because then he did a speech at the first stop. He did a speech at the first stop. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 19:54

We knew there was gonna be a speech at some point.

SPEAKER_02 19:56

I didn't I didn't know how loud it was.

SPEAKER_01 20:00

He did great, he was great to do it. Uh everyone heard him. Um, but yeah, he was trying to give you a toast and just to kick it off and thank everyone early on, which made sense to do it in the first one versus the end when everyone's hammered. Um, but I

The Toast And Being Seen

SPEAKER_01 20:15

think really what um kind of his he very much described what we all knew and love about you is and he was showing his appreciation for understanding that the life he lives is a direct result of the effort and the life you've built. Like that was it at the end of the day. Like, yeah, he understood that, you know, he loves you, he loves his life, and he wanted to do this for you as a way of just saying thank you. You may never get it again, like that's gonna be it. But I mean, I think he did a really fantastic job. Like, you know, I'm sure you felt and saw it. That was it. That was the takeaway. Yeah, he and I think the it was important for his kids to see that too. So, again, as moms, as women, you know, and we often don't ask for validation because we don't actually need that. Like words of affirmation can be one thing as a love language, but I feel like, you know, I'm gonna I'm gonna make a generalist statement, but I do feel like men often need more validation than women do. We just do it. Like that's we're nurturers, we so for you to just sit as uncomfortable in the moment as you were, because you were, well, y'all are like, you know, and he was funny about it. I think he said it the best way he could, and that most men could is saying thank you.

SPEAKER_02 21:42

He used a sports analogy too generational talent.

SPEAKER_01 21:46

Yeah, what was that? I remember that.

unknown 21:48

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 21:49

He was like, We said hockey. She's a generational talent.

SPEAKER_01 21:53

Yeah, that was more just funny Mike Mike Michaelisms, but I mean it came across loud and clear, it was lovely.

SPEAKER_02 22:00

No, it was very kind. And it was um, and I you know what actually words of affirmation are not my love language. It's actually acts of service. Yes, and and he shows up in acts of service. So like he's an act of service, and actually that totally was an act of service, that whole thing. But like everybody, you like to be acknowledged. Like, not I don't need to be a fused, like, oh bananas, but I do what I think it also kind of came about is I feel like, and you're like the like we're the I'm a coordinator. Yeah, I coordinate our family, I coordinate our extended family, our groups of friends.

SPEAKER_01 22:36

Like I just do it like 10 times more than the average Joe. Possibly, you do, but that's your tap, that's your beautiful superpower, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:47

So, and I don't mind doing it, but sometimes when it doesn't seem reciprocal, because sometimes it doesn't appreciate, right? It it can wear on you a little bit. You're like, why am I always the one? Yeah, why I'm always the one because you like to be invited to things too, you like to be asked as well, not just always the planner. Yeah, um, I felt great validation in being that planner in that weekend or that day, because I felt like, oh, this is the result. So actually, the act of coordination and the following up and the planning and the thinking and the let's do this, let's do this, let's do that. Actually, everyone came, Tanya. No one canceled. Can I tell you a funny story? Throw me away.

SPEAKER_01 23:32

I was like, I need to tell you something funny. We need to interrupt here. Yes. And I I need to, if I know I have one friend, girlfriend who's listening to this and she knows who she is. So you were like, I don't think it's gonna be that many people, everyone's gonna show up. And I'm like, everyone is gonna show up. I knew that wholeheartedly. And when I did mine, I knew everyone was gonna show up. You know why? Because you show up for everyone. And I have a girlfriend who she said at one point, she's like, Were you ever worried no one was gonna show? And I was like, No, like that thought never crossed my mind ever.

SPEAKER_02 24:10

Well, I didn't think no one was gonna show up.

SPEAKER_01 24:12

No, no, she I was saying she's an extreme, she would never plan it because she worried no one's gonna show up. Oh, I know people and I'm just like, but you were like, I don't know. I think people, I was like, no, people will make the time, and you saw that I knew everyone was gonna show up for you.

SPEAKER_02 24:29

I had people, a few people, I know Michael was like after he was analyzing because he had his data of oh, this many people coming to this like each stop.

SPEAKER_00 24:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:38

Um, and there was one friend who was they had plans, and she's like, This is way too much fun. She called her husband, get down here, we're not going anywhere. They were the last place. Yes, he was like, Exactly. I'm not why would I leave? I'm not explaining my plans.

SPEAKER_01 24:53

She canceled the rest of her plans. It was 100%. And it was, and that was even better. It was fun. But for you, and I think people need to hear this because I get that from a lot of people who say, but what if no one? I'm like, this is not something you do every Saturday. Like, it's it's a 50th birthday, and those people, especially those who've walked before you, those people who are at that time understand the importance. People are gonna show up and they're gonna enjoy it. And you guys planned, like, I thought I did a good job, but you guys did a really good job. Like, thank you. It was a really great time, and like, well, your people are wonderful, which I always knew that, and I've told you that in in meeting them. So that's part of it too. But you hosted it really, really well, and I think that's a big part too, you know?

SPEAKER_02 25:41

Well, it is different people from different parts of your life who I also think in the last year I've been merging people where I can like our mahjong group, like an intercoming, like an OG friend coming in to teach a bunch of women to teach play mahjong, and those mahjong players

Why People Show Up

SPEAKER_02 26:00

are from all over my life. So some of them already knew each other, which made that like you would then have been able to go to any table, yeah, and at least know a person. Yeah, yeah. And when I looked, I think it was the second place, I was like, oh, this is actually really cute because there was like the left turn group. Yeah, there was like my OGs, your OG slash exactly your left. And then another group was like a neighborhood, yeah, and that and my kids in neighborhood and hockey, kind of like Burlington kids, yeah, people, and then there was like the 07 ums mixed in with the mahjongers. I was like, you guys literally put yourself, yeah. I couldn't have organized you, yeah. But then also, of course, everyone goes to where they know.

SPEAKER_01 26:44

They do, exactly. And I know that was the thing because when I came in, I saw a few that I hadn't seen, the ones who were at the second place, yeah, which were some of me I knew from Mahjong um and Roper. So I went over there to say hi, big hugs, and then I turn around and and our left turn people are there. So then I'm like, okay, let's sit, because you do, you naturally, but then I so I love too that you did the stages because even though some were quieter than others, it was a nice time to just at least catch up and feel. So then when I went to the third stage and I walk in and I see your OG Laurier, I was like, I'm sitting here. Like I intentionally was like, I haven't had a chance to talk to those people yet. Yeah. So I'm like, poo, and I think people could then have an opportunity to move around. It was just really well done.

SPEAKER_02 27:31

That's good. Thank you. Thank you for moving around. Did you learn anything you didn't know?

SPEAKER_01 27:35

Or hear any sort of. I mean, more like the differences into sp uh spicy, uh, what do you call it? Um spicy margaritas.

SPEAKER_02 27:46

You learn margaritas.

SPEAKER_01 27:47

Are different at each are different at each spot. Oh, really? Is that what you ordered at each place? I did. I wasn't gonna last as long as I did if I wasn't drinking tequila. Let me tell you that.

SPEAKER_02 27:58

There was tequila second one. I had a tequila drink at the second one.

SPEAKER_01 28:04

Yeah, but I stuck to kind of what I wanted and knew to like my longevity is clear. Yeah, um, but yeah, no, I I probably did. I just had good. I felt good because I felt like I talked to like a bunch of people. Good. So that was good. I wasn't just with the same people, which was nice. Yeah. So that's why I think the seven and a half hours that I lasted, you lasted longer, um, went like that. Right? Like it went so fast, and I think that's why. Like I think it's because you were with different people. And then you guys did a good thing about, you know, you had a bit of um scavenger hunt, whether we all made it to the end or not. It doesn't matter. It gave us, it gave something to I think the organizer, Michael, of the scavenger hunt might have had too much to drink at one of them, the first one.

SPEAKER_02 28:54

And so all the that part went out the window.

SPEAKER_01 28:56

It totally did, and then his scavenger hunt was we were like, there was corrections required. We were laughing so hard. But the point is, it didn't matter, it was just another way to facilitate a group, a group, yeah. So well done. So the nut net from all of this is do the thing, do the party, do the gathering, do the reflection of this is in whatever way that works for you. Um, you know, it doesn't even have to be one, it could be I've done that because I kind of celebrate my birthday every year, but I know in my 49, I was very intentional. I know you know.

SPEAKER_02 29:35

So some people do it more than I'm like, I'm not a Leo, so I don't just move along.

SPEAKER_01 29:39

My Leo April 23rd is justn't that be amazing. See now why it's so good? But you can do it in like you could do smaller chunks, like plan three or four, but be intentional about spending time with the people that have impacted your life to tell them you love them and give them an opportunity to share back.

SPEAKER_02 30:01

I think that's the takeaway because that was the took away that I think I'm gonna plan something like that every year. Like I sat on Sunday going, okay, so in general, this group of this large group kind of knows each other, and most of them are local-ish, except for kind of OGs. They're not local. I'm like, you could do this every year. Just that's that's you.

SPEAKER_01 30:24

You could make it an annual thing because God forbid we wanna change it up.

SPEAKER_02 30:30

Doesn't have to be exactly the same. The point though is I felt like that when Michael and I celebrated 40th, we had two parties, and then right after my 40th, I was like, shoot, what are we gonna do when I was turning 41? So then we had a big keg party because I was like, I really loved seeing everybody, and then we did it again, and then I guess we stopped. And then it took us nine years, like it took us a long time. The milestone pushed us back into action because you know what's gonna start happening eventually. Hopefully, it's not funerals, hopefully it's weddings, like weddings and events like that.

SPEAKER_01 31:05

But we're probably 10 years out from that, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 31:07

So then either we're gonna do for 10 years. We're gonna plan some sort of trip. There's gotta be some sort of Burton trip. Yeah, there's gotta be some sort of Burton keg party concert night. I don't know, something, but I came home thinking, what can I do?

SPEAKER_01 31:21

Well, I'm already I'm on I'm already planning my 55th. So you know what is it? You just wait.

SPEAKER_02 31:29

I have a loose plan in my head, genuinely. Trevor Trevor said, What is what's going on for 51? What are we doing for 51? Like, oh, I can get on that. I can plan, but also wait, we gotta before we wrap up, like we're gonna go on our my trip. Yeah, let's talk about what's now next for you. So, yeah, it this is only just started.

SPEAKER_01 31:48

That's it. Don't you think that's even isn't that even better? I know. Yes, I know. Okay, welcome to my life.

SPEAKER_02 31:55

Just started. Like, I'm like, oh my goodness. Okay, so that was honestly one of the best days ever. Have all the favorite people, all this love, beautiful reflection over the last 50 years. I also felt great forgiveness to myself over because like not that I was beating myself up over things, but sometimes you can look back and go, Oh, I wish I did that better. No regrets, could have done this, you know. But like, there was a I was like, huh, this is I'm really happy with these 50 years. Like, was everything perfect? No. But was it a good 50 years? Yeah, like if like knock on wood, nothing's gonna happen. But shit, if it did, yeah, I get where you're going. I've lived it. It's good. Like this is good, so let's just keep this ball rolling. 100%.

SPEAKER_01 32:43

Well, so now what's happening on Thursday on your actual day?

SPEAKER_02 32:48

On my actual day, I get on a plane and I'm gonna go to Rome with my daughter, who's turning 21. So I'm gonna start a tradition of taking a kid with the year they turn 21 somewhere. So she's coming with me. We're going on a European cruise. Let this war please not interrupt us. No, it won't. And we're going to Rome and then Rome, Greece, Turkey, back. And two friends are joining me who also turned 50. Is it only two friends?

SPEAKER_01 33:14

I thought it was more than two friends, but it is only two friends.

SPEAKER_02 33:16

Unless there's anyone showing up that I don't know about.

SPEAKER_01 33:18

No, I don't know.

The 27-Day Europe Birthday Trip

SPEAKER_01 33:20

No, no one said anything. For some reason, I thought it was I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 33:23

Katie, you met Katie. Katie was booked and then had to cancel. Maybe that's what it was, though. And then there was like conversation. Yeah. But it's um But that's nice.

SPEAKER_01 33:31

That's a nice mixture.

SPEAKER_02 33:33

Yeah. So, and those are the two blondes who were bananas and hilarious. Love them.

SPEAKER_01 33:38

I actually spent the least amount of time with those two.

SPEAKER_02 33:40

Oh, they're right.

SPEAKER_01 33:41

But I was like, darn it. I might have to be able to do it.

SPEAKER_02 33:44

I need something down the row oven. Yeah, they're nuts. They're hilarious. They're fun. They're so good. It's going to be and even if if nothing happens, it's a floating boat. No, you're gonna love it. You're gonna love it. And you get time with Lauren, which is awesome. I'm very looking forward to that time with Lauren. And then we leave Rome and we go. So just so anyone listening, I haven't been to Europe in 20 years. So this is a big, massive catch up. This is not a normal thing, this is a long time planned extra special trip. Uh, because I do feel I keep saying using the word indulgent because it is indulgent. This is indulgent for me.

SPEAKER_01 34:19

Like this is very special.

SPEAKER_02 34:22

Uh, and so then special on a budget where I can make it a budget. So then Michael is coming with the two younger kids. Yeah. Meeting you. Talking about all of this, like my house is heavily armed and I'll be watching.

SPEAKER_01 34:41

It'll be fine.

SPEAKER_02 34:42

There will be guard dogs. There's someone house sitting. Go on. Someone is house sitting. So anyway. So uh anyway, there we're then going from Rome to Paris. And we're gonna meet in Paris. Love it. Five days there. Love it. All the details are planned. Then we're going up to Belgium doing some World War I history stuff, which I'm excited about. Do some Belgian waffles, beer, come back down, then they go back to Paris. My kid is going on a course in London. So we're going to London. And of course, I was gonna come home. And Tanya, you said, I'll meet you there. So I'm not coming home. So you're meeting me in London. Like, woohoo, here we go. And one of my oldest high school friends lives in London, so she's gonna overlap a little bit. Yeah, you're gonna get to meet Una. You'll love her. I'm excited. Uh, so there's three days there, and then Lauren leaves for her course for the week. The week or sport management stuff. We're doing that. We then get on a plane and we go to France and we drop in Bordeaux. And we do some wine touring, there's a bike tour one day. There's like other we do the left bank, the right bank, then we get on a train and we go up to Champagne. That's gonna be a long train. I got a map from CAA, by the way, of on Monday. It's big. Yeah, it's like on the size of Ontario, right? It's like going from we're gonna take this, we're gonna take a we're gonna need some downtime, dude. We need some train from like Patron of the Thunder Bay, isn't it?

SPEAKER_01 36:08

Yeah, I know. I know it's gonna be a long trip.

SPEAKER_02 36:10

That's okay. And uh, and then we go to Champaign, get to do all that, and then we come back to London and fly home. But it's 27 days. So can I just say that's a long time? As a at this age and stage 27 days, it's almost a month. Like it's a month, basically. It's basically a month. Yeah, it's four weeks almost. So that's a big deal to be away from work, yeah, from your family, from your house, from your routine.

SPEAKER_01 36:38

But you will love it. And then you and what will be great, as I always say whenever I've done, like I haven't done a month, I've done maybe 22 days is my max away from the house, is you just receive you'll have such an appreciation when you do actually come home. You'll feel rested, you'll feel refreshed, and then you'll come back and be so appreciative of all of the things you have as well.

SPEAKER_02 37:02

I'm curious too, because whenever I go with my family, like say two weeks, I'm the one chomping at the big to stay out. I never want to come back. I'm like, I have moved into a new level of relaxation. Even if we're busy, busy, busy, busy, because I like to be busy, busy. You're gonna get to travel with me. You're gonna have some thoughts on that. We're gonna see how I've already traveled with you. I have a good sense. Not you haven't you haven't sightseed a venture traveled with me yet. So we'll see.

SPEAKER_01 37:25

No, that's true. I love a I think I have a good sense.

SPEAKER_02 37:29

I like to pack the agenda.

SPEAKER_01 37:30

I like that too, though. Like I like, but I like it more when someone's doing it for me.

SPEAKER_02 37:35

Yeah, so I got I got you. You got you. Yeah. So I'm curious if I'll be like fatigued and want to come home, which I imagine I'll be ready to come home. But usually after two weeks, I want to keep going and my family.

SPEAKER_01 37:46

I think two weeks. So for me, and I don't know. Um, so I'd love I can't wait to hear what you have to say. Two weeks, I could stay on. Like I find like there's a there's a tipping point. Yeah. So I'm with you at two weeks, I'm like, this is great, I could keep going. And I I'm usually sad. Yeah. But by three weeks, by three weeks, I'm starting to feel okay. Yeah, I need to come home. So it'll be curious as to where you I could think I certainly think by 28 days you'll be like, okay, that was fun. But maybe not. Maybe you'll be like, screw this, I'm like gonna be in Europe for the rest of my life. Anyway, I'm excited. We do need to wrap it up though. Because we have no meeting. We might have another meeting. Also, it's been it's been a good amount of time.

SPEAKER_02 38:36

See, this is this is when you're gonna be wanting to go home because it's a good amount of time, and I'm gonna say, Oh, we just want to sit on this bench a little longer. A little longer. I'll be like, enjoy, I'll meet you at home. So, okay, I'm gonna wrap it up with something somebody said to me on Saturday.

SPEAKER_00 38:52

Okay, I'm excited.

SPEAKER_02 38:53

I was blown away from, and it's I've been thinking and pondering on it. So this woman who is more on the newer, like I've known in the last couple years, at the end, is like uh like emotional, not at the end, the end of the first event. So she was she was around for a while, so it was she she was only a drinker or so in, so it wasn't driven in that way, but she was emotional and she's like, I've been talking

Building The Life You Want

SPEAKER_02 39:20

about you for days. You I'm watching this chat, I'm watching all this, and she said, You have built the life that I have always wanted. She said, I'm keep saying to my husband, she's this is what I wanted. Yeah, and I didn't have a response for her, and I still don't really have a response because I don't think I have always because I'm like the kid that doesn't want to come home from vacation. There's so much more to do. There's so so it's like that unsatisfied, like I'm always wanting to be more not that I'm ups like sad, I want to improve and I want to like make it better. Anyway, I'm gonna I've been sitting with it and I'm like, fuck, like she's right. I'm so I did that. You did do it. I'm very happy of myself, and I'm as you should. And I think again, that's what I think is. I think that's what it is is realizing you did this, you built a life that you wanted, and maybe there are moments when you think it's not exactly what you want, maybe it's what you needed versus what you wanted, who knows? But that statement has been sitting with me since then, and I think I'm one of the luckiest people I know, and I think I'm yeah, so that's you're very grateful and very thankful.

SPEAKER_01 40:47

Happy that's amazing. I think that's what 50 is, and that's why I would encourage everyone to do their best to have that moment to just to your point reflect, appreciate, and look forward, right? Like that's really it's a it's a 50 just feels like a really nice time to pause. Like it's halfway through, quote, quote unquote, halfway through your life. Like, you know what I mean? Like it's kind of like that point. And you got to do that. And here's the thing, Amory. I think someone saying that to you helps with the appreciation and feeling grateful because you don't take it for granted because you realize that not everyone does have that. And we've talked about all those reasons. And my response to that person would be, well, you still can. Like that's back to like, yes, okay, so it's not 50 for you, but maybe it's 55 or 60. Like you put in the effort to create that. Like, this was not given to you. You did that. So anyone can, but you get what you put in. So you gotta do the work. Yeah, you gotta say yes to things, you gotta connect people, you've gotta put yourself out, like all of those things.

SPEAKER_02 41:56

Yes, and that's why I love the name of the half-century tour for the same thing. It was a tour because we were going place to place, but I realized, oh, it's a tour of your life. Through the last 50 years, yeah. This is a tour through what you've done, what you did, but also what you still want.

SPEAKER_01 42:13

Well, it it is. I think it it it refines what you're going to now reach for because you learn. So, in appreciation of what you have, you want more of that. You don't want all the shit that you left behind. Like you also left a lot of shit behind. So it's like positive people, the types of people you will attract energy flows, you will attract the same. That is it all makes sense.

SPEAKER_02 42:37

It's kind of I'm happy for you.

SPEAKER_01 42:39

Keep learning, right? It is the best gift that you can give yourself, people can give you, and you can also give others. And I think that everyone should do that. So, yay, Amory. So now, cheers to you. Thanks, happy to your next excitement. Happy birthday.

SPEAKER_02 42:56

Love you, friend. Thank you for being a huge part of these 50 years. Of course.

SPEAKER_01 43:02

Well, I'm only it's only 10. So, which I'm excited because I'm like up for the challenge. I'm like, we'll see what is going on at 60 and 70. Right there with my with my gray hair and my cute outfit. Don't worry, I'll still do it.

SPEAKER_02 43:17

My mom lasted for three stops. I was like, it was great. She was great. She was going. However, the shot she took, let's just pro tip. She put her hot she put her iced tea in a little shot glass, and then she always like smart. Well, June didn't knock she knows what she's doing. All right, love. Okay. All right. See ya, see you in a minute. See you in a minute.