What happens when the version of you that has always been capable, productive, responsible, and able to get things done suddenly can't keep going in the same way?

My guest, Natasha Ramlall, calls this an identity rupture -that unsettling space between who you have been and who you are becoming.

Natasha spent 25 years working with newcomers and refugees settling in Canada before eventually recognizing that the work she had once loved no longer felt the same. She followed the pull toward something new, but instead of immediately feeling energized by the change, she found herself exhausted, overwhelmed, and unable to function in some of the ways that had always defined her.

That experience led her to look more closely at the relationship between identity, the nervous system, embodiment, safety, and the patterns we develop to move through the world.

In our conversation, we explore:

• What an identity rupture can look and feel like
• When being highly capable and productive becomes part of our sense of safety
• How to recognize pushing, functional freeze, and moments of surrender in the body
• Why slowing down can actually feel uncomfortable or unsafe
• The guilt and shame that can arise when we aren't being productive
• The difference between something being unsafe and simply being unfamiliar
• Why our nervous system may resist an identity that feels more authentic
• The tension between attachment and authenticity
• Resourcing and developing a felt sense of safety
• Learning to experience emotions we may have once needed to suppress
• Why being witnessed and accepted as our authentic selves can create a different experience of connection

At one point in our conversation, I found myself expanding on the question we often associate with the nervous system: Am I safe?

What if there's another question underneath it?

Am I safe enough to be fully myself?

For those of us who have learned to find safety through being productive, helpful, responsible, agreeable, or the person everyone else can depend on, that can be a much bigger question than it initially appears.

This conversation is an invitation to get curious about the identities we've built, what they may have done for us, and what can happen when we begin listening to the parts of ourselves that are asking for something different.

Connect with Natasha Ramlall

Visit Natasha's website to learn more about her work and access the free resourcing practice mentioned in the episode. https://www.humanistcoaching.ca/

If you enjoyed this conversation, subscribe to The Spiritually Curious Therapist and share the episode with someone who might be navigating a transition of their own.

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Until next time.  Stay Curious.

You can find Jodi Silverman, LCSW at
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www.journeywithkindredsouls.com

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