Strong Families Stronger Societies

Transcript

0:00

today's session is going to be on. Strong families, stronger societies. For those of you who ever wanted to start a family. Sometimes I get this like divine inspiration to share different topics that can add value, especially add value in today's. Day and age with everything going on in the world. One thing that I'm super passionate about is just showing people how families can help develop, or strong families can help develop stronger societies. Think about this. What if the most powerful institutions in the world aren't necessarily schools? They're not a company military law, but the family. The family, your personal family and the power of how your personal family can transform a community is absolutely incredible. So today we're gonna unpack how strong family relationships help raise healthier kids, lower crime, boast of the community, and build resilient communities. So whether you grew up in. Picture perfect home. Maybe you were born and you and you hit the parent lottery. I know that wasn't necessarily the case for me hitting the family lottery per se. But all in all, whether you come from that or you're just rebuilding your family right now, maybe you're in the process of starting a family or maybe at some point in time you would like to, then this session is definitely for you if that is the case. So to get us kick started, we're going to. Start off with some life hacks and fun facts to get the day kickstarted. And I love the life hacks and fun facts, by the way. I share all kinds of things that can essentially make your life better. So if you're new to the Breakfast Club, I'm a holistic life coach, and I share a. All types of different topics and just science backed information that could make your life better. So here are some productivity and focus hacks. The very first one to get us kickstarted is theme your days. Theme your days instead of. Juggling everything daily, dedicate certain days to specific focuses. So example Mondays can be for your meetings. Tuesdays can be for your creative work. Fridays, for example, for me and my household, Friday nights are typically when we get together for pizza night with my boys and wa we watch a movie. It's not every single Friday, but we do our best to make that the theme of every single Friday and then Sundays. We just refer to it as family day, like we're going to church, we're hanging out with our kids. Just really unwinding from everything work related. So really great way to go about your week, theme your days. Next up we have background brown noise. So unlike white noise. Brown noise has deeper frequent frequencies that can improve concentration and reduce anxiety. So it's actually great for creative flow or deep work. In fact, right before I started the Breakfast Club, as I'm putting together this breakfast club session, I had some background brown noise happening. So the white noise is really good. When I'm like taking naps, I'll have. Certain sleep that there'll be sleep playlist that I find on Apple Music. And then I have a deep focus playlist that I have for just creative work, deep work when I wanna be productive. So that's really the biggest difference between white noise and brown noise. So think of it as white noise can essentially help you just relax and possibly even get some rest where the brown noise helps you just get into a peak state. So really good difference. And next we have digital sunset. So stop using screens 60 minutes before bed. Your sleep quality improves dramatically after just three days. So for those of you who read, let's say, an ebook, you may want to switch over to I know Kindles, I believe, if I'm not mistaken they have like specialized screens so that it's not affecting the quality of your sleep or just get paperback books go a long way go back to the old school. And I know for me, whenever I read a book, especially on personal development, it tends to help me just wind down and make myself sleepy. So next we have the mind dump method. Every morning or night, write out everything on your mind, no filter it. It reduces anxiety and helps you focus on what really matters. So anything that you're going through, writing it down and writing it down, writing down anything that you're thinking about. For me, I know it's helped tremendously over the years, just taking some time to get what is in this brain of mine. On paper or on even a notepad. So your phone, chances are it has some kind of a notepad or journal. And one thing that I can say is that over the years, whenever I had. Anxiety about something or I'm a bit overwhelmed about things that I'm currently facing. It always helps to just write down what I'm feeling, write down what's overwhelming me, and it can be one of the biggest life hacks to just help improve your mood or to just help you overcome anxiety whenever it does hit you. So it, it even helps honestly with just looking for solutions. Sometimes your mind is just so inundated with. Everything that you're up against, that you don't even have the capacity to come up with creative solutions. You don't have the capacity to become resourceful. So that's one of the things that writing down your issues helps with for sure. So next we have some health and energy. Life hacks. Now, this first one you guys probably saw going viral, and that's the cold water face dip. There, there are science backed benefits to this. So the way it works is you dunk your face in cold water for 15 seconds in the morning. You guys may have seen a lot of people doing this on social and on social media, and basically it activates your vagus nerve, improving mood and alertness. Instantly. So lots of benefits to just dipping your face in cold water. You can put some ice water and give it a shot. Give it a shot, see if it works for you. For those of you who are looking to get your day kickstarted. Next is stand in the sun for five minutes. So just five minutes of morning sunlight boosts serotonin and reset your circadian rhythm. So especially for those of you who don't necessarily get outside much. It's so important to make sure you're getting sunlight. Not only does it provide you with vitamin D, but it also helps with serotonin. And serotonin is a mood stabilizer. It helps you with your overall fe feelings of wellness and wellbeing. So definitely a really great life hack. I know for me. I walk anywhere from two to three miles a day in my neighborhood, and it's easy for me because I'm in Florida and I know for those of you up north is probably not that attractive to go out there and work in the cold or walk in the cold, but it absolutely does help, even if it's just for five minutes, getting out there in the sunlight. Next is a hydration trick, so add a pinch. Sea salt or lemon to your water, it helps your body absorb the hydration faster. So one thing I've learned about lemon too, and you guys are more than welcome to put a comment in the common thread if you have more information on this, but I remember hearing how lemon helps alkalize your water natural. For a long period of time, I was just squeezing lemons into my water, and I definitely recommend it for those of you who are looking to improve your health. Again another, I haven't done the sea salt, the pinch of sea salt, but it really does help your body absorb the hydration faster. So give it a shot, see how it works for you. All right. Last but not least, with some fun facts we have. Your body replaces all of its skin. Every 27 days. So technically you have a new outer layer. Every month. So one thing that I find fascinating is the human body. Within a seven year period, pretty much all of the cells in your body, the vast majority of them have been replaced. You are physically a completely new human being after seven years, and I always found that fascinating about the way our bodies progress. So next we have dopamine peaks. When you anticipate a reward. Not when you get it. That's why the journey often feels more exciting than the actual destination. So the anticipation of some kind of a re, re a reward is essentially what triggers that feeling of just excitement. Think about it. For those of you who maybe you're going out on a date in the evening and you're really excited about the date, think about the rush of energy that you have throughout the day. Or maybe you're getting ready to go on a vacation and you can't sleep the night before anybody ever get vacation insomnia where you cannot sleep because you're so excited about the vacation. Or maybe you just have a, have anxiety about waking up on time, but either way. It's super beneficial to just have some kind of a reward that you're working towards because it does help boost that dopamine. So next we just have a few last personal development shares before we jump into today's topic. The very first one is build your emotional bank accounts. Identify an important relationship that might be in disrepair. So think about that. Do you have any relationships in your life that might currently be in disrepair? Any relationships? It may be family, it may be friends, it may be family that you've had to love at a distance for a while because of just the toxicity, but identify them. And next is to list three deposits. You could make. So for those of you who are in a relationship, what's an emotional deposit that you can make in that relationship? Maybe it's leaving your significant other a nice note. Maybe it's just saying something kind. Maybe it's doing something, some act of service, right? Some kind gesture. But what's an emotional deposit that you can make? Maybe that family member is just checking in on them, seeing how they're doing. Checking in can go a long way when it comes to relationships. And lastly is list three withdrawals you need to avoid. So what are three withdrawals that you need to avoid? Perhaps it's not about just what you can get, but what you can give in the relationship because you've just been taking, and it's time to actually pour into that person. So ask yourself. Do I know what constitutes withdrawals and deposits for the important people in my life? The emotional bank account symbolizes the amount of trust that exists in a relationship. Deposits build and repair, trust, withdrawals, break down trust. So this is super, super important when it comes to building any kind of relationship. Sometimes that withdrawal. May very well be in a business setting where you're doing business with someone and there's constantly things that are withdrawing the trust dynamic that you have in that relationship. And perhaps it's just a communication improvement. Maybe you just have to improve the way that you com communicate. Maybe you have to be more transparent. In the relationship or go about your communication in a different way. That opens up trust, right? So that's a big factor when it comes to any relationship. So here's a great quote by Stephen Covey, and that is in relationships, the little things. Are the big things. So really great quote, and this is a share from the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. Last personal development share that I have for you guys is who are the most universally admired people in our culture, aren't they? Those who have a solid grasp of their own values. People who not only profess their standards. Live by them. We all respect men and women who take a stand for what they believe. Even if we don't agree with their ideas about what's right or wrong. There is undeniable strength in individuals who congruently lead lives in which their philosophies and actions are one. Make congruency your goal. Is there anything you currently do that's inconsistent with what you believe is right? Take immediate action to rectify this. Then think for a moment what's a value or a principle you absolutely live by, and how has it enhanced your life? So this is really great to segue into today's topic because one of the things that I'm very passionate about and believe in wholeheartedly is the power of family values. Family values. Some people will look at it as religious values, but I look at it as family values because. Being conservative with the way you go about your life and the way you go about your family. It transcends religion. It transcends just, let's say the dogma of what has existed for thousands of years. When it comes to, let's just say, even spirituality, like there are a lot of practical things that can be universally. Implemented and integrated into a family, right? So think about it. No matter what religion you're in or what culture you're in, whether you're in Japan or you're in New York, or you're in South America, or Africa or wherever in the world, having family values where you get together and you break bread with your family and you focus on building a strong family, right? Maybe it's a nucleus family, maybe it's a more progressive. Type of family, a more modern day family. But the biggest thing is really putting a lot of focus on your family and doing what's always in service to your micro community, your household. How can you. Always do what's in the best interest of your overall family? And the thing about it is, if you improve a family, you improve a community, you improve a community, you improve a country, you improve a country, you improve the overall world. And that's why it's important to start at the micro level. I'm very passionate about just. Fostering and cultivating family values and also just teaching on the importance of family values. Because for me I grew up in East New York, Brooklyn. At a time where East New York was the murder capital of New York. It was one of the most dangerous places to live in late eighties, early nineties when I was growing up and I was reflecting on this recently, I was laying down, I woke up like around 3:30 AM a few days ago, and I was just reflecting on what were some of the patterns, what were some of the causes that led to a lot of the violence and crime. Where I grew up, and one thing that I noticed is that the majority of people that I grew up with, the vast majority of kids that I grew up with, grew up in broken homes, grew up without father figures, grew up where their mom was just doing their absolute best to just survive. And doing their best to just manage a family and not really having that family support, that family structure. And I believe that the very foundation of a healthy society is having a strong family. Even if. It's a single parent household, but just having the support from not only a motherly figure, a fatherly figure, a masculine feminine role, having that support when it comes to resources, having that support when it comes to just parents who give their time the give, give their time, energy, and attention. To their children. And I believe that this is the very foundation of a healthy society. So for me, it's important that I live in this way with my own personal family and lead by example, especially in today's generation. Because if we truly wanna build a healthy world, if we wanna lead the world better than we found it. It is essential that we start at the family level. So I'm gonna be sharing a lot of just research and facts on a lot of the benefits of this. And perhaps this is something that you can teach on. Maybe you've done a great job at just growing your family. And if you have any tips, any recommendations, drop them in the comments and let's jump right into it guys. Before we go into that just a quick heads up. Many of you know that part of the work that I do outside of just coaching is teaching people how to get into the business of coaching. How to personally become. A coach, a speaker and through whatever medium you choose, whether it's speaking on stages around the world, many of you guys were at my recent creator's conference that I had which was absolutely amazing. It was so nice to see so many of you and many people want to get into this line of work. So a lot of people tune into the Breakfast Club. They also teach within their communities. They coach, they mentor. It's been part of my life's mission to not only teach this information, but to teach people how to go out there and spread the knowledge, spread the information, spread this information that could essentially make the world a better place. Because we're so much better if we do it together. It's one thing to add value. To the world, and it's another thing to multiply value to the world. So if we're gonna multiply value to the world and get it out there, it's it is essential that we have more people who get into this space, whether it's podcasting, speaking, coaching, mentoring. All of that good stuff. So if you ever had any aspiration, if you ever had any desire to go out there and make an impact in the world, or maybe make this a profession or even just a side hustle where you make income for yourself, being a coach, speaker, all that good stuff, hit me up. DM me the word coach. I have an entire community, an entire program centered around helping you guys learn how to make extra income on top of what it is that you do. Just. Again, coaching, speaking, podcasting, consulting, all that good stuff. And I know it's been one of the greatest joys of my life has been helping people, inspiring people speaking on different mediums, whether it's television or podcasts or radio or anything like that. Yes, feel free to reach out to me if you guys have any questions. I'm always happy to answer any questions that you guys may have on how you can get into this space. So let's jump into it. Again, on this episode we're talking about the importance of building strong families and what that actually means for the wellbeing of children and society. I'm gonna be sharing a lot of research backed data, practical steps so that you can use in your own personal home and conversations. Just in general that I've had over the years with people especially people who've. They've already done it. There are many of you who tune into the Breakfast Club where you guys are like 50, 60 plus years old, and you've been there, you've done that, and you've built really amazing relationships with your children who are thriving. And I've had so many conversations through podcast interviews and so much more with amazing people and how they've gone about this process. So I'll share a little bit about what I've learned over the years. So before we get. Into the bulk of today's information. I wanna share some statistics with you all that are super valuable to understand. The very first one is around 65 to 70% of US children still live with two parents. Family living arrangements matter for child outcomes. So that is the majority, which is a really great thing. But one thing that I have to emphasize is that. Just because you grow up in a two-parent household doesn't necessarily mean that you're going to thrive more. You just have a better chance, especially if you have really great parents. So I've seen it where kids will grow up in two-parent households, but they're neglected emotionally. They're not. Given the time, energy, and attention that they need to really thrive. So it's not enough to just have a two-parent household, even though this may account for the majority of the country. It's also important to make sure you're spending time with your children, making sure that you're actually checking in on them, right? Spending that quality time. I've seen many cases, for example, in suburban areas. There, there's a, there's an entire opioid crisis in suburban America where a lot of children are getting hooked on all kinds of drugs from fentanyl and so much more. And there's a lot of underlying reasons, right? But one of the things that I want to stress is the fact that many parents that. They make beautiful environments. Like they, they have children who live in these beautiful homes and they send'em to the best schools, but they're constantly working. They're putting in 67, 70 hours a week on their jobs. And when you think about it look at the highest suicide rates aren't necessarily coming from the hood. They're not coming from the most impoverished areas. A lot of the time it's in these suburban communities. Because there's not that emotional support needed in order for these children to thrive. So I just wanna stress that it's not all about having a two-parent household. It's having two parents that actually give a damn. The second statistic is. A lot of meta analytic reviews show parent parental involvement. Talking about school reading and helping with homework is associated with better academic achievement and creativity. So many of you all know that in my household, we actually homeschool our kids. So I can go into all the reasons why we homeschool, but one thing that I can share is one of the biggest reasons we homeschool is because. The way the world is today. Children are very exposed to the culture. Children are growing up really fast, and we honestly just didn't like the direction that the public school system was going. And then, yeah, there's some amazing private schools, charter schools even Christian schools and religious schools that are out there. But for us, we wanted to teach. Our kids are values, right? Not what the world is projecting on them. And we just wanted to show them how to think critically. We wanted to show them how to think like us. We've done pretty well for ourselves. And we know that our frame of thinking, if our children adopt a lot of our thinking, that they'll thrive in this day and age. So it is important for us to be able to pass that on. Okay. So again, having parental in involvement is the biggest takeaway from that. Next is a study of US cities found neighborhoods with high levels of single parent households had up to 118% higher violent crime and 255% higher homicide rates. In some comparisons. So think about that, right? And. The thing about it is you have to take context into consideration, right? So there's correlation, not the sole. Cause in many cases, so in, in the world of statistics, sometimes there's this idea that a correlation does not imply causation. So there's a lot of factors, but think about that. 255% higher homicide rates in some comparisons, right? In single parent households. This is a very important factor. If you go to prisons around the United States. Even though the majority of the country may have two parent households, but when you look at the majority of prison inmates, the majority come from single parent households. So it is important to understand the power of having that structure, right? So you may have a mom who's nurturing, but the father to really bring the order and let that young man know hey. I don't want you out there in the streets. Sometimes it's difficult for a single woman to, to be there over overseeing whatever their teenager is doing throughout the course of the week or who they're involving themselves with. So that's why it is essential to have that masculine presence in the household Now. There's other factors, right? Paid parental leave quality, childcare and child benefits are linked to better early life outcomes in global analysis. So policy choices change, family, families', capacities to provide. This is a big factor as well. Sometimes these issues are very systemic there. There are policies that are put in place that can help families thrive and for example. When I was growing up I grew up in the hood. I didn't come from any money whatsoever, and the generation prior, they didn't necessarily have all of the benefits. So when my family migrated to the United States, or migrated from Puerto Rico, I should say they, they came to America right from a very impoverished way of life. And I could argue to say that a big reason why. The country or the island of Puerto Rico was impoverished, was because of a lot of systemic. Things like government regulation and systemic just issues and policies. This does play a major factor when it comes to society striving. For example, if you look at some of the happiest nations in the world, which tend to be a lot of Scandinavian nations, so if you go and look up like the Ne Netherlands, Switzerland, Sweden, a lot of these countries really thrive. Now you have countries like Dubai and. All over the United Emirates Dubai's not a country, but the United Emirates United Arab, em, Emirates, and Saudi Arabia. Now they've adopted a lot of these practices that they've learned from Scandinavian countries on what makes a healthy society. And oftentimes it, it is systemic policies and regulations that are in place to help. The society thrive. So a big factor when it comes to just the flourishing of a society. So in my generation, for example, even just having access to government programs that could help me get an education, half of my ED education was covered by the government right when I went off to college, and it definitely helped me because if I didn't have access to that. There was no way in the world I would've been able to go off and get an education and my life would look drastically different today. There are so many ways that our government can help. And that's why as much as people argue about taxes and everything like that, taxes do help countries thrive. Okay? Some of these countries that have the best. Just happiness levels in their societies. Some of them do have very high taxes, but they're able to put that money back into their people which is powerful. Okay, next we have Global Child Wellbeing. Reports show recent declines in mental wellbeing and academic skills since the pandemic, so family supports are a major protective factor. Okay. You want your kids to thrive not only emotionally, but academically and in their lives. Take that time to leave those emotional deposits with them. Okay, now. Keep in mind that these are just a few studies and some findings, but poverty, education and structural factors also play major roles. So when my family migrated to this country the thing about it is. The economy was in a different place, and sometimes when economies thrive, that also helps a lot of families thrive. It reduces the pressure, right? Because oftentimes what leads to a lot of trauma is neglect is abandonment, and that neglect and abandonment is coming from parents who have to work. 2, 3, 2 to three jobs just to be able to make ends meet. Okay? So having a flourishing economy does help in a lot of societies. Again. Think about this. Strong families help children do better in school and life. It reduces harm in neighborhoods and strengthens the economy overall. And we can all play a part in creating them. So let's jump into it. I wanted to start off this next segment by going over some child development and family environments. And just some key points on this. So the very first one is on family stability and living arrangements that correlate with child outcomes. Okay? So for those of you who have children, or maybe you're on your path to at some point in time, have children take some notes, this is definitely going to help. Okay, so as I mentioned earlier, 65 to 70% of children in this country live with two parents while the rest live in single parent, grandparent or other arrangements and family structure and stability are linked to a range of child outcomes, including education, health, and economic mobility. Okay, now. I was having a discussion with my wife the other day on how a lot of Caribbean people who migrated to the United States had that moral ethic they had religion coming to the United States and they came from families that really fostered two parent households coming to America. And there was a lot of other factors. Work ethic and wanting to really make the most of their opportunities. And a lot of these Caribbean people who migrated to like places where I lived growing up in Brooklyn they did really well for themselves coming to this country. Whereas people whose family had been in this country for generations, they're not taking advantage of the opportunities at hand. And there's so many different factors. So having some kind of spiritual framework it really does help in a lot of different ways, especially when it comes to bringing community together. Another thing is. Parental involvement boosts academic and creative outcomes. And again, going back to that study, it really does have a major impact. Now, one of the things that I always found interesting in a lot of Ivy League schools, you have the majority you see in, in Ivy League schools or even Nobel Prize winners are from people that come from the Jewish tradition. And it's interesting. And I believe that a lot of that correlation comes to their holy Shabbat dinners, their Sabbath that they have every single week where they get together. And one of my really good friends is Jewish. And he just explained to me that at the dinner tables, oftentimes these families will they'll challenge each other's thinking and sometimes. These discussions they'll go back and forth and challenge each other during these dinner discussions, and they'll ask their children what? Do they think about different ideas, different causes and stuff like that. I love that aspect of their culture and to think that for a lot of them they thrive. The majority of Nobel Prize winners, if you look at it like, even though this small percentage of. The population like they, they account for less than 3% of the population, but the vast majority of Nobel Prize winners the majority of Ivy League students, right? And that's because family support is embedded in their culture. So very important to understand, but also like just challenging kids and the way they think. My wife and I are very big on this, where oftentimes we'll. Just ask our kids why they think what, whatever it is that they think. Because it's not always important to know what to think. It's important to know how to think, okay. And challenging your kids definitely goes a long way. So next is family resources and policies. Also matter. So whether it's having these income policies leave or childcare as I mentioned earlier it definitely helps. Think about it. Paid parental leave and the child benefits in quality early childcare helps families provide better starts for children which shows up in health and learning. So I think that this is definitely something that every fortune gen, every, and not even Fortune 500 or fortune thousand companies, but every major company. Any company in general should have some type of maternity leave. And not only for the mom, possibly even for the fathers at times if they can afford it. Because not all companies as an entrepreneur, I understand this, not all companies can afford this, but if they have the means to be able to offer this, it definitely helps their employees thrive. Who are parents. Okay. Big factor. Now just to share a few rituals in my household that have been super beneficial. Maybe you guys can take away some of these and implement it in your family. So a few rituals that come to mind for us. Like I mentioned, we do the homeschooling thing. Prayer before meals is something that we embedded in our household, and not only just for prayer, but also just to express gratitude. So one thing that my wife and I understand is that. An attitude of gratitude is always gonna help you throughout the course of your life. And having prayer anchored before your meals, it anchors gratitude at the same time where you're expressing gratitude for that meal, for the hands that prepared that meal, and for God even blessing. You with that meal. Okay. So that's a big factor is that's a ritual. That's something within our family. Another ritual is bedtime stories. So my children, and this is definitely one of the most I hate to use the word exhausting, but sometimes when you're out there building businesses or you've had a long day. It is tough to just come up with a random bedtime story, but my kids love it. And even though like I may be laying in bed, they'll come and just ask for me to come share a bedtime story. Many times I'll go, I have this children's Bible book that I also just read to them. They love that as well, maybe you don't have the creative capacity to just come up with random stories. You can just have a book that you can read and just that quality time, it goes a long way. And I always feel good after just spending that quality time with them. And I also pray over my kids right before they go to bed. And that's a big ritual in, in our household. And like I mentioned earlier, we do the Friday night we'll do our best. We don't always nail it sometimes. Life is just Lifeing. But we do our best on Friday nights to just do a movie night and just shut it down after 7:00 PM and watch a movie with them. Eat some pizza and that's a really cool way to bring us together. And then Sundays are like our family days. Where sometimes we'll go out to a restaurant, we'll go to church, we'll hang out. I'll take them to my really good friend Jay we'll get our kids together on Sundays. We just brought them together for a potluck and they hung out their. Really good friend slept over so little things like this to just get them around other kids. And these routines, they just go a long way. Perhaps you guys can take away some of these. These are just a few that we implement in our household and it has definitely been super beneficial with everything that we have going on. Okay. And of course, taking that time to just take'em to the park, right? Things like that. Take'em outside. We also make sure our kids, we always say, we call it touching grass. So if they're playing on games for a long time, we're like, Hey, go outside, touch some grass, and they have to go out for an hour and just play outside and be normal kids as opposed to just being glued to screens all day. Just wanted to share a few of those and remember at the child level strong family involvement, stable caregiving, and economic. Support. It all lines up to improve learning and wellbeing when it comes to a family dynamic. And think about it, what happens when we look beyond the child at whole neighborhoods and the economy? It's not a good setup, right? So it's important to break down the dy the dynamic that we have with our children at that level, if we're truly gonna thrive as a society. Here are some societal effects of strong families. As I mentioned, our research across US cities find areas with higher levels of two parent families. They tend to have lower crime rates and single parent families have. Su substantially higher violent crime and homicide rates in some analysis. And I know this'cause I grew up in the hood and the majority of my friends, they didn't know their dads or their dads were probably locked up or not involved. And I've seen this happen firsthand. So this isn't something that I'm just like reading out of a textbook. It's something that I personally have witnessed. My friends who had just. Strong family support. It always helped. Now I wanna share some encouragement because I know we have single moms who tune in, single dads who tune in. I wanna share some encouragement for you all. So if you're a single mom and you have, let's just say young boys, make sure you get those young boys in sports. Get them around, coaches, get them around masculine. Just solid men that could help them thrive in, in, in their lives. I know for me, my coaches, like I, I played football, I wrestled and I ran track all four years of high school and I played football in college and this always helped me just staying off the streets. It always helped me stay grounded. It always kept me accountable. It allowed me to just really learn from men and learn what it's like or what it should look like to be a man to be a provider, to be a protector, to learn discipline, to learn teamwork, to learn work ethic. And that's what sports does for young men and young women, right? I believe that sports is the backbone of this country, right? It helps so many families because there are children that just thrive because of their foundation of learning how to be a part of a team and take on leadership roles and things like that. So get your kids around. Just solid coaches and mentors, or maybe there's afterschool programs where they can get involved with other. And if you have solid uncles or solid godfathers in the family be selective with who you choose and appoint to be your child's godfather or godmother. Sometimes that can be the one person in their life to help you on your journey if you're a single parent. Okay? But seek support. We can't do this thing on our own. There's so much power in community. Okay, so next is on economic and intergenerational mobility. So children who grow up in more economical stable two-parent households generally have. Higher chances of upward mobility, family structure and interacts with income and education to shape adult outcomes. Okay, so this is according to some academic reviews, and it's true. It's true. Being able to support a child financially. It goes such a long way. Okay. And then national wellbeing and child trends. There's global and national reports that show that child wellbeing whether it's mental health learning outcomes they improve over decades, but recent years, show worrying declines. In mental wellbeing and academic skills, family supports and public policies are major levers to this. So we have to do our part with making sure that whenever we vote someone in office, that we're voting people in, in office that really are embodying family values. Again, if we're gonna save our country, we have to start with saving our families. As I get ready to bring this in for a landing here remember. How we protect our kids in neighborhoods where family instability, poverty, and limited services all overlap. What policies, lever matter most jobs, childcare, parenting supports or something else. But it is important to give thought to this. Okay, so next we have just some habits of strong families. And this is the biggest takeaway that I wanna leave with you guys. Seven habits. Of strong families and what strong families typically do in their families to thrive. Okay. The first one is daily connection. Some kind of a daily connection ritual whether it's dinner, check-in, bedtime talk. But just checking in, especially if you have teenagers. Sometimes teen teenagers are going through things that you never in a million years would know that they're going through in school, whether it's bullying or navigating through relationships and all this stuff. But just check in some kind of ritual that you can put in place. Okay. And I know for me what helps me is like later on in the night, just checking in with my kids. Secondly consistent routines. So it can be bedtime, mealtime. Homework time, but remember, kids thrive on predictability. Okay? Thirdly, shared responsibilities and co-parenting agreements. Okay? Clarity reduces conflict. So don't have your kids just growing up in a very chaotic. Environment, have them getting involved, have them being a part of the family. Obligations, family responsibilities. Fourthly is active parental involvement in learning. So reading together, attending a school event, helping with different projects. All of this stuff definitely helps. Number five is prioritize emotional coaching. So there's so many ways you can go about it, whether you're naming the feelings that your kids are going through. Or modeling calm. Yesterday, my, my youngest comes up to me crying because his older brother apparently had hit him. And as much as I, I wanted to go off on my older oldest son I just, the first thing that came to mind is like, why did you do that? Why did you do that? And in my household, like we don't hit our kids. This is a big. Part of just our parenting style. And one thing that I can tell you, like when I, my first son I had that mindset spare the rod, spare the child or whatever. And I probably would give one little spank if he was just acting or doing the most. And I learned though, with my second and third sons is that I didn't have to do that. For those of you who feel like you have to spank your child, I'm here to tell you a, as someone who grew up with Caribbean roots, I'm here to tell you that you do not have to, you do not as much as you think you have to. You do not have to. There's a way to be able to communicate with your kids and speak to them like adults. And reason with them and you can be even more effective just by talking it out with them. And I know it may seem like a stretch, and this may be up for debate for many of you, and I've seen both styles work for people. I can tell you that right now, I definitely have seen both styles work for people, but it is important to, more than anything, model calm. Model calm. I believe that we have a moral obligation to break generational cycles. And what if you can be the generation that models that calm to your kids so that in their generation they don't have to beat their children, right? They can reason, they can have open dialogue about everything that they're going through and teach their kids on how to navigate through their emotions. So emotional intelligence is a big factor when it comes to building a healthy society. So talking to kids about how to navigate through their emotions, it definitely goes a long way. Number six is community supports. So having some kind of a network, it could be a neighbor network, parenting classes, maybe in your faith-based institution, whether it's a synagogue, MAs, temple but having that network of people that help that village mentality the village that helps. The children thrive and checking in on them is a big factor to a healthy society. And last but not least, is advocate for policies that support families. Okay. Whether it's paid leave, childcare wraparound services, all of that stuff most certainly helps. Ladies and gentlemen, I know that today was very different in the sense that we covered a lot of family stuff, but again. Whether you have a family or you don't, whether you hit the family lottery or you didn't. The biggest thing is really just doing better than the last generation that came before us, and not going backwards, not declining. Continuing to push this planet forward, and leaving this world a much better place for our children, for our grandchildren, and it is important for me to talk about matters that. Are important to me, things that I genuinely believe in my heart of hearts that can make the world a better place. And that's why today I covered family values because there are so many people out there that need access to just this information because awareness is always going to be the very first step to healing. If we're going to have to heal this planet, we're going to have to heal the family. And remember, families aren't perfect. And many of us are in the process of building them. Strong families aren't about a single model. They're about stability, involvement, and supports that let children flourish. And if this session helped you today, feel free to comment, share, tag. All that good stuff because it most certainly helps get the message out there. So thank you so much for all of you who've tuned in. I definitely appreciate every last one of you. Breakfast is officially served for this morning, and again, if you have any questions for me personally, if you wanna set up a complimentary coaching session. Maybe it's been a while since you last met with me. I always do my best to meet with as many people from our community as. Possible and see how I can support you guys. Just hit me up in the dms. I'll be more than happy to meet with you guys throughout the course of the month. So take care. God bless, and I'll be seeing you all soon. Breakfast is served.