The Most Important Relationship You'll Ever Have

Transcript

0:00

this week we're going to be covering the most important relationship you'll ever have. Can anybody take a wild guess as to what is the most important relationship you'll ever have? For those of you who don't know, you can actually catch the Journey podcast and the Breakfast Club specifically live every single Tuesday at 7:00 AM Eastern Standard Time on multiple social media platfor- forums from Facebook to Instagram to YouTube, uh, and, uh, everything in between. So welcome, uh, for those of you who are hopping on with us. Always excited to be here with you all. Shout out to all my New Yorkers. Right now we're in the NBA finals with the New York Knicks, and last night did not go as expected, but it is all good. We are still up 2-1 in the NBA finals, and a really big deal for those of you who are from New York, you know the pain that's been in our generation being a Knicks fan, and to see us get this far has been absolutely incredible. And the Spurs are definitely putting up a good fight, so, um, you know, they're not gonna just hand it to us and it's all good. Uh, but shout out to my New York Knicks and all my Knicks fans all around the world. So, all right, let's jump into it. The most important relationship you'll ever have. Now, for those of you who are listening to this, you're probably thinking, "Okay, he's gonna make this, uh, a spiritual talk," right? And I think it's quite obvious that the most important relationship you'll ever have is definitely with your creator. So I think that's a given. I wanna go into, um, outside of the creator, what is the most important relationship you'll ever have, right? So many people, uh, you know, they're very in tune with their spiritual life, which is absolutely amazing. But outside of that, right, what is the most important relationship that you think you'll ever have in this lifetime? Do you think it's your marriage? Do you think it's your relationship with your children, with your parents? Um, I personally believe that the most important relationship you'll ever have outside of your relationship with God, with your creator, is with the relationship you have with yourself. The voice you hear most often is your own. Think about that. You take you wherever you go, and you can never escape you. So it is super, super important to have a very healthy relationship with yourself. And what does that even mean? Is it even possible to have a relationship with yourself? So I'm gonna show you guys a little bit on what that looks like. I know it took me many years to really develop a, a, a healthy relationship with myself, spending time alone. And for those of you who kinda struggle with being alone, being a little bit lonely when you're by yourself, um, you can get to a point in your life where you actually enjoy spending just quality time with yourself. And I'm gonna go into some of the reasons why it's just even im- important, especially for the sake of your other relationships that you have in this lifetime. So think about it. Most people spend years trying to improve their relationships with their spouse, their children, their friends, clients, colleagues, and so on and so forth, but very few people genuinely stop and ask, "What is the quality of the relationship I have with myself?" Think about it for a moment. If you had to rate your relationship on a one to 10 scale with yourself, what would you rate it today? What does that even look like to have a really healthy relationship with yourself? And I'm gonna share a few examples of, of what that may look like for, for you or just what it looks like for different people. Now, uh, before every conversation, every business decision, every goal, every dream, every challenge, there is one relationship that follows you everywhere, and that is always going to be the relationship that you have with yourself. You can move to a new city, you can start a new career, new business, really doesn't matter. You can even reinvent your identity, but you never leave yourself behind. And the truth is, the quality of your life will rarely exceed the quality of your relationship with yourself. So why does this even matter in the first place, right? Imagine having a friend who spoke to you the way some people speak to themselves. So think about it. Think about some of the negative self-talk that a lot of people you may know may have with themselves, or just that internal dialogue. Have you ever said like, just mean things to yourself, or you beat up on yourself, or you had guilt or shame around something specifically, right? Or you may have certain negative self-talk, like, "You'll never figure this out. You're not good enough. You always mess things up. Who do you think you are?" Right? Things like this. Most people would end that type of friendship immediately, right? So why do you let yourself off the hook? Why do we let ourselves off the hook when we have this negative self-talk, right? So many people tolerate that voice in their own minds every single day. The voice you hear often becomes the story that you believe, and the story you believe becomes the life that you create So it's super important to be mindful of your mental model of the world, the stories that you have in your head, uh, because it also determines how you navigate through very difficult seasons. You can, for example, look at life as happening to you. You can look at life as happening for you. I remember growing up and hearing a lot of people say, like, things like, "Well, why does this always have to happen to me?" Right? Or, or something always-- even if it's, if, if it's, uh, a good time, something bad will always end up coming around. Like, I remember I used to think like that. Like, like things are too good, right? You, you get so used to living in a, in a toxic environment where when things are really good or the relationship is real good, you end up self-sabotaging because it's like, this is just uncomfortable. Like, I'm not used to living in peace. It almost feels as if something is brewing in the air, right? And we end up self-sabotaging. So having that healthy dialogue with yourself, having that healthy relationship, healthy stories that are conducive to your overall wellbeing, absolutely essential on your journey. Now, the very first thing that I wanna cover is the foundation of a relationship with yourself, which is self-respect. Self-respect. Do you have self-respect? A healthy relationship with yourself always begins with self-respect. And when I talk about self-respect, I'm not talking from a place of arrogance or ego, not believing you're better than anyone else. But self-respect is simply believing that nobody else is better than you, right? It-- That, that's the difference between cockiness and confidence. My mentor would always say that, right? Co-cockiness is when you think you're better than other people. Confidence is when you know nobody else is better than you, right? That's what we talk about when we're talking self-respect. Now, self-respect is simply believing I matter. People with self-respect set boundaries for themselves. They take care of their health. They protect their time, walk away from situations that diminish them, make decisions aligned with their values. And people without self-respect oftentimes settle. They're like a walking doormat. People just kind of walking all over them, taking advantage of them. Over-commit, seek approval, tolerate disrespect, and abandon their own needs. So a really powerful question to ask yourself is, would I allow someone else to treat me the way I treat myself? So think about that for a second. If you had to do some self-inventory on the way that you treat yourself, think about first and foremost how you treat your body. How do you treat your body? Do you treat your body like an amusement park as opposed to a temple? Is your body just a source of pleasure, right? Where you're putting anything and everything in your body and just not really being kind to your body. And a lot of people fall into this trap. It's like self-respect does start with your health. It really does. You have to start with your health because, again, there's no, there's no other, like, body hanging up in a closet somewhere that you could just replace your current body with. You have to be very mindful of how you take care of your body. That's a big, big part of it. I know for me, fitness and, and health and fitness has been such a big part of my life, and one thing that I can tell you is if you want to stay consistent, just develop a lifestyle of taking care of your body. Because what'll happen is even if you start deviating off track, even if you start dancing in the dark for, for a couple of days, you naturally start to gravitate towards your North Star of having a healthy body It's everything. Like yesterday, we were watching the Knicks game, and some friends of mine had ordered some wings. And because the NBA finals is going on, I've been in a lot of wings environment. However, you know, for me, I was just like, not to say that wings are unhealthy per se, I guess it just depends on, on how you make the wings, but, um, y- the, the day before or a couple days before, um, I was also offered some pizza. And I've been noticing myself just kind of in environments that, uh, don't have the greatest quality food. And typically, you know, I wouldn't mind eating some wings or some pizza or whatever. But for whatever reason, my body just started to reject the idea. Um, and maybe it was just more of a mental thing, but it started to reject the idea of even putting it in my body. Like, I didn't have to fight it. There was no crave, no craving, like, "Man, I'm missing out by not eating this." Right? Like, my body just immediately was like, "Yeah, I'm good on this." Like, and, and that's what we talk about. When we're talking self-respect, you get to a point where it doesn't even require much, much willpower to take care of yourself because it becomes such a part of who you are. It becomes a standard that you set for your life. And a, a great mentor of mine, I always share this on, on the Breakfast Club, that a great mentor of mine would oftentimes say that one of the most powerful forces in the universe is the human's personality's desire to be congruent with who it believes it is. So if you believe that you're a high-value person, that you do value your body like a temple, right? And your body, like I always joke around and say, uh, you wouldn't put regular gas in a Bugatti, right? Imagine if your body was a Bugatti, how would you treat that body? You don't just leave a Bugatti getting dusty and dirty and not giving it the, the proper maintenance, right? You cherish the Bugatti. You probably are gonna want that Bugatti shining and looking good and smelling good and the best maintenance, and you're going to put premium gas in that Bugatti. And imagine if you treated your body like that How much, how much more different, uh, would be your quality of life, the way that you feel about yourself? So super, super important to understand. Self-respect definitely starts with your health. Next, self-trust. Confidence's older brother. I like the way, uh, that's put there. Confidence, its older brother, right? That's, that's self-trust. So if you want more confidence, you have to start with self-trust. Many people want confidence, but confidence is often the byproduct of self-trust. Self-trust is built when you consistently prove to yourself that your words actually mean something. Think about that. When was the last time you really just analyzed h- the, the weight of your words? How valuable are your words? Like when you say you're gonna do something, you actually follow through. And I know that setting that as a standard could be absolutely vital throughout your journey. Like, how do you ever expect for other people to value what you say if you don't even value what you say? It, it starts with you valuing exactly what comes out of your mouth. One of the four agreements in Don Miguel's book, The Four Agreements, really great book if you guys haven't read it, but one of the four agreements is being impeccable with your word. How impeccable are you with your word? So when you say, "I'm going to work out," and you do, "I'm going to make the call," and you actually follow through, "I'm going to wake up early," and you follow through, your brain begins collecting evidence, right? It's, it's starting to realize that, "You know what? I can count on myself." And the opposite is also true. Think about how many things you said you were gonna do and you simply just didn't follow through. "Oh, I'm gonna start this business," or, "It's gonna be different this go around," or, "I'll never subject myself to being in a relationship like that," and you end up reverting back, right? And think about this. Every time you repeatedly break promises to yourself, you weaken self-trust. The greatest betrayal is often not what others do to us, it's the promises we repeatedly make to ourselves and never keep. Super powerful to understand. Now, your internal dialogue shapes your reality. There's a really good book I always recommend that on The Breakfast Club, and that is What To Say When You Talk To Yourself by Dr. Shad Helmstetter. It's all about self-talk, and your self-talk is a big part of your life. When you think about it, the human brain thinks anywhere from 30 to 60,000 thoughts a day. A lot of what we focus on is just constant self-talk, just having this inner dialogue. And one of the things that I wanna emphasize is the power of questions. The power of questions. The quality of your life is determined by the quality of questions you consistently ask yourself. So rather than saying, for example, "Why can't I afford this?" What if you switched it to, "How can I afford this?" Two completely different ways of looking at your situation, right? Why can't I versus how can I? And throughout the day, our brain is ser- ser- uh, like, constantly going through a series of questions and answers. So what if you just improve the quality of questions that you ask yourself? A lot of my greatest, uh, problems that I've, I've solved over the years have simply come from asking myself better questions. We become the conversations we have with ourselves. Most people don't realize that their mind is constantly listening. Imagine two entrepreneurs, for example, facing the same challenge. Person A is probably thinking, "This is impossible." Person B is probably like, "This is difficult, but I'll figure it out." Or what if Person B just asked themselves a better question? Like, what if it were possible? How would I solve this problem, right? Same circumstance, different outcome, different future. The stories we tell ourselves ultimately become self-fulfilling prophecies. So it's like, for example, if you constantly say that y- people in your family are, are toxic and it's a big part, like, your family's cursed, you're probably going to unintentionally create a self-fulfilling prophecy in your own life, thinking and believing and reinforcing this idea that your family has bad luck, right? So you have to be mindful of, of that story, the story that you consistently tell yourself. Now, when it comes to, uh, moving forward, when it comes to a healthier internal dialogue, what that sounds like are things like, "I'm learning. I can handle this. This is temporary. I'm growing through this. I've overcome challenges before." The goal isn't toxic positivity. The goal is truthful optimism. So what, what do we mean by that? So think about it. For those of you who've gone through some life, and you know there are those seasons where life is really lifing, and you're going through a really difficult storm. How do you look at what it is that you're going through? Do you look at it from a lens of, "Woe is me. Why is this happening to me?" Or do you look at it as, "This is gonna make for a powerful story one day," or, "What can I learn from this? How can I grow from this? Where's the opportunity in this? What's great about this?" Oftentimes when you're going through very difficult circumstances, and let's say you're in a, in a tumultuous season or you're going through health challenges or financial challenges, could there be a blessing in that specific season? Could there be some treasure in that trash? So you may be going through financial challenges and it allows you to just recalibrate. It allows you to just get grounded, to get, get a, a, a develop a closer relationship with your creator, re- become more spiritual, spend more quality time with your family. Sometimes those health crisises become a blessing in disguise because it finally slows you down. You've been on go, go, go, go and you're working nonstop and you forget the important things. So it is super, super important, especially when you're in a really difficult season of your life, ask yourself better questions because those questions your, your mind is naturally gonna look for an answer So that's why the quality of your questions is so important because whether it's positive or negative, your brain will look for an answer, and that's what ultimately leads to what you focus on, which typically leads to how you feel in that moment. You wanna take control over your feelings? Take control over your focus. You wanna take care or take control over your focus? Take control over the questions that you ask yourself. Super, super important to understand. Next, keeping promises to yourself. One of the fastest ways to improve your relationship with yourself is simple. Start keeping small promises. What are some small promises that you can keep to yourself today, for example? Like, for me, I haven't worked out in a couple days, and I know it's long overdue. I was supposed to work out yesterday, and I know I have to get into the gym today, and that's a small promise. And when you keep those small promises, it's, it's a big deal. It's a lot bigger than you realize. Sometimes the, the, the transformation in our lives are not these drastic events that happen. It's literally those really small events that happen through the day, those, those small promises, if you will. And most people think transformation is, is really coming from a giant breakthrough, and it's really from the tiny agreements consistently honored. So examples could be drinking more water, something as simple as that. Drinking more water, going for the walk, reading the chapter, making the call, doing the workout, sending the email. Every kept promise sends a message, and that message is, "I trust myself." How important is that? You've ever gone so dark in your life where you've gotten to a point where you, you've lost all clont- all control, and you feel like you're out of control to the point where you don't even feel like you can trust yourself? I've been there. I know exactly what that's like, and it doesn't have to be like that. You can just start building momentum. Start to build that trust with yourself. Oftentimes, when we think about building trust, you, you think about building trust with maybe your significant other, building trust with your children or your parents, but when was the last time you really worked on the trust issues you have with yourself? Building trust with yourself. It's rarely spoken about, especially in the world of personal development because you don't typically think of trust as an inward process, where can I genuinely trust myself? And the thing about it is over time, these small victories compound into a powerful identity. Imagine getting to the point where you genuinely know in your heart of hearts that if you say you're gonna do something, you actually follow through. You've gotta stop breaking trust with yourself. Stop saying that you're gonna launch this business or launch the business or, or go all out or, or, or write the book or start the podcast and you never do. Or you keep telling other people, and now you've built a reputation for someone that doesn't follow through on their word. Your word is everything. It's, it's super, super important, so honor your word. Next is emotional resilience. Big part of this as well. Emotional resilience, a healthy relationship with yourself doesn't mean that you'll never struggle. It means you stop abandoning yourself during difficult times. Think about that. A lot of people who go through very difficult circumstances, the first thing that they wanna do is self-intoxicate. They may want to do retail therapy. They may want to avoid feeling the feelings. You go through a miserable breakup and now you're just eating a lot of comfort food, and you're not exercising and, and you're just doing things to, to gain pleasure in that moment. And then you feel horrible after, you feel shallow. So you don't wanna lose yourself during these difficult seasons. Allow it to be an opportunity to really connect with yourself. If you're feeling pain with what it is that you're going through, there's a reason for that. But you don't want to mask the pain and sort of put a Band-Aid on a gaping wound. It's important to do the healing necessary, and sometimes the healing is painful. The stitching process for a open wound can be very painful, but it's better in the long haul, right? Because you're, you properly heal. So sometimes it is essential to just feel what it is that you need to feel and, and stop abandoning yourself when things get really difficult. Many people become their worst enemy when life gets hard. But what if instead you became your own coach, you became your own, your own mentor, or you even parent yourself? You take care of yourself as if you're caring for a young child. This is what, what it means to really connect with your inner child, right? Because we all have that scared little boy, that scared little girl that dwells within us. But how, how well have you cultivated that relationship with that inner, inner child? Right? Your own mentor could very well even be yourself, coaching yourself through the process. In the world of psychology, it's called metacognitive awareness when you step outside of your thoughts and you look at your life, you look at your thoughts and observe your thoughts right from an outsider's perspective. Right? Almost like your own source of encouragement where you can come in and really identify what's going on and, and give yourself the proper advice, right, and, and really talk it out. Because the reality is you are not your body, and you are not your mind. You are not even your thoughts, right? You're a body and a mind with thoughts or, or you're a soul with a body and mind that has thoughts of its own. Right? So imagine speaking to yourself the way you'd speak to your child, your spouse, or your best friend during a difficult season. Hopefully... And I'm talking about, uh, being a good parent, right? So if you're gonna parent yourself, parent yourself as if you were a really amazing parent or a really amazing coach. How would you be? If you were an incredible parent, how would you talk to your child? Or if you were an amazing best friend, how would you talk to your best friend? You probably would be very supportive, very encouraging, very loving But we tend to just kinda beat up on our own selves. Why did I do this? And, and we, we go into a state of guilt, a state of shame, and it doesn't have to be like that. Resilience isn't avoiding hardship. It's learning how to support yourself through it. One of the best pieces of, of advice that I had gotten on my journey is, uh, simply to just be kind to yourself. It's, it's amazing how, how much we lack kindness when it comes to the way that we treat ourselves. Like, we're just constantly beating up on ourselves, and what if you were just very understanding? Like, it's, it's like parenting, right? With my children, I have a, I have a really good understanding of my children simply because I was once a child. And you ever, like, tell your child that, like, you know... Or, or y- your child thinks they're slick, and you just know. Like, you even address it to them. Like, "Look, don't think you're slick. I've been there, done that. Like, I know exactly what you're doing," right? And they can't really... They, they can't pull that card. Like, they, they can't get over on you because you've been there, you've done that, right? So it's, it's important, like, when you're, when you're being kind to yourself as well, right? Like, you, you've, you've been here before. And, and how do you stay kind to yourself when you, you've... When you're going through a difficult season and you know the different ways that you self-sabotage. But what if you just took time to really process what you're going through, analyze what you're going through, feel what you need to feel, and genuinely started to parent yourself? And when we say parent yourself, what does that even look like? Like, if you're, if you're parenting a child and you're a really good parent, you're probably gonna make sure that that child eats when they're supposed to eat. You're probably gonna make sure that child goes to bed at a reasonable time. You're probably going to uplift that child and speak life into that child, right? You're probably gonna make sure that that child does things that are important for their future. Right? And that's what we're talking about. When was the last time you genuinely were like, "All right, did you drink enough water today? Did you, did you go out in nature? Did you spend time building your dream?" Or whatever it is, right? So, um, why a healthy relationship with yourself changes everything. The reason why it changes everything is when your relationship with yourself improves, think about this, your relationships naturally improve. A rising tide raises all ships. So a healthy relationship with yourself will ultimately lead to a healthy relationship with other people. You also stop seeking people to complete you and start relating from a place of wholeness. A lot of people simply seek external validation to fill their needs, their intrinsic needs. So maybe they have an intrinsic need to feel significant, and they're constantly going to other people to feel significant, but here's the thing, that could be a dead-end road because the moment you're not getting significant from other people, you feel lost, you feel empty, you feel like something is missing. Think about even going into a committed relationship. The best relationships are when two whole people come together And, and they don't need each other to, for validation. They don't need each other for happiness. They don't need each other for peace. They have this internal self-worth, internal self-respect. You're gonna be a far better partner by respecting yourself, having self-worth, being able to make yourself happy, never relying on other people to make you happy. Now, is it important to help your partner meet their needs? Absolutely. But it's not something where your partner should be depending on you to meet their needs. It's not how it works. You have to find a way to meet your needs on your own, because if you go about it in that way, you have 100% control over that. How you fill your need, how do you fill your own cup? Okay, and you can't give from an empty cup. So that, that's the issue is a lot of people are constantly depleted trying to pour into other people from an e- empty cup, and you just have nothing left to give. Okay, so when it comes to just your relationship, uh, with yourself, another thing is your business improves. When you have a healthy relationship with yourself, business tends to thrive a lot more 'cause you know who you are. You don't, you don't navigate through rejection the same because in your mind it's like, "They're not rejecting me, they're rejecting themselves." Right? It's, it's... You have a healthier relationship even with rejection. Okay, that's what it means to have a healthy relationship with yourself in, in such a way where your career thrives more. You make decisions from confidence rather than fear. Your health improves, right? You begin treating your body like someone worth caring for. Even your finances improve because you don't have to, again, constantly be shopping, constantly be buying things just to fill yourself up, right? Fill yourself up with variety or whatever the case may be. You have too much self-respect for yourself to just blow through all of your money, right? You stop acting from desperation and start acting from intention Your happiness improves. You also no longer need constant external validation to feel valuable. You know who you are and whose you are. So yes, that important relationship with your creator is everything. But after that, the most important relationship is yourself. Now, here are some practical ways to develop a better relationship with yourself. Number one, spend time alone intentionally. When was the last time you blocked out time on your calendar to genuinely take time for yourself? I was watching, uh, social media... Uh, I was looking at a social media post the other day, and the rapper Gucci Mane, he had, uh, mentioned how one of the things that he does every single week is he takes himself out on a date, and when he takes himself out on a date, it's always for the same thing. He takes himself out for his favorite sushi, and then he'll drink some sake, and that's like his little tradition. Once a week, that is a part of his self-care, spending time alone. When was the last time you dated yourself? Like, went on a date by yourself, like you took yourself to the movies or you took yourself out to eat It's, it's crazy how many people can't fathom the idea of just spending quality time with themselves. If you've never done it, I definitely recommend it. Take some, some real quality time. Maybe you journal, maybe you go out in nature, maybe you do a little picnic by yourself, and do the things you love to do. Maybe it's listening to a podcast. Maybe it's reading a book. Maybe it's drawing. Do something that, that really makes your heart sing, and learn to enjoy your own company. Learn to enjoy your own company. Drop a one in the comments if you believe that you are an absolute vibe. I don't know about y'all, but I can't speak for everyone, but I believe that I'm a vibe and I absolutely love being with me. You should learn to love to just be with you and just soak up all your time to, to, to be with yourself. Spend time with yourself, because you're never really alone. It's like you've got God with you all the time, 24/7, wherever you go. So it's also spending time with your creator. I believe spending quality time with yourself is also a part of spending time with your creator, right? That's, that's a big, big part of it. Now, um, when, when you're enjoying time with your company, that could be walking, journaling, meditating, reflecting, and if you're uncomfortable with being alone with yourself, that's also important information. That shares a little bit of feedback on what you have to work on in your life. There are people that absolutely fear being alone. It's like there, there, there constantly has to be noise, there constantly has to be some type of, of toxic environment, right? And then they fall into self-sabotage. So a big part of, you know, building a, a better relationship with yourself is also auditing your self-talk But like what I mentioned earlier, that metacognitive awareness where you genuinely just observe your thoughts. So for one day, just notice how you speak to yourself. Throughout the day, I wanna encourage everybody who's on right now live with us, genuinely just notice what you say to yourself for a day. Would you say those things to someone you love, is the second part of this. Like, the way that you talk to... Like, if you genuinely loved someone, would you say those hurtful things to them, right? Another thing is keep one promise daily. What's one promise you can set for today? Something you probably have been putting off that you know you should be doing. It could be working out. It could be reaching out to a potential customer, whatever that is, right? But keep one promise to yourself today and start building that trust, start building that momentum. Doesn't have to be 10, could literally just be one. And remember, consistency beats intensity all day, every day. Next, we have celebrate small wins. This is a big part of the process because your brain associates pleasure to productivity. When it knows that there's a reward at the end, it, it, it gets excited. You have this rush of dopamine. And most people only acknowledge themselves after massive achievements. And I spoke about this last week on The Breakfast Club, where you, you have to have that immediate feedback. Maybe by the end of the week, you celebrate yourself for putting in the work. Maybe you've made those promises to yourself all week long, and now you take time to celebrate yourself. But do something every single week. It doesn't have to cost money. It could just be maybe you watch your favorite Netflix show, right? And that's the way that you celebrate yourself. Maybe it's buying some ice cream and going for a walk, doing something to really celebrate those small achievements throughout the course of the week. Now, your brain is always going to need evidence that it's moving forward, and that's one of the best ways to do it. Next, as I mentioned earlier, practice self-compassion. Again, be kind to yourself. Growth requires accountability, but accountability without compassion becomes self-punishment Think about that. If you're constantly just trying to force your way to being productive, force your way to doing the things that you need to do, it's, it's not coming from a place of compassion, right? You wanna treat yourself firmly but kindly, and be, be forgiving of yourself. Like, if you don't follow through, it's okay. You have an- another day. I always share the, the metaphor of being in the shower, and a shower is very, for me, symbolic for washing away all of the, all of your issues, washing away all of the stresses, washing away whatever you're having anxiety about or worry about, and looking at the water go down the drain. And the water can be very symbolic for the, the drama, the darkness, the, the issues and, and everything in between getting, you know, going right down the drain, and it's a fresh start after every single shower. Imagine if you, if you treated your showers like that, like every time you showered it was like a fresh start to start like, "Okay, whatever happened is the past, and I'm just gonna let it get washed down the drain, and I'm gonna start all over again." You, you give yourself permission to reset as many times as you need. There's no rule book for how many times you can reset, and if you have to do it multiple times throughout the day, then by all means, go for it. But the biggest thing is to have compassion, to have forgiveness towards yourself when you don't follow on these things. Another part of this is stop comparing your journey. When we talk about kindness and self-compassion, you have to be mindful at how much you bring yourself down because you're comparing yourself to other people, other people's highlight reels that probably is just one little piece of their life, and not realizing that they're living lives of quiet desperation, maybe just like you or maybe even worse. But you're only looking at their highlight reel because that's all they're willing to post on social media. So you, you have to be mindful of comparing yourself to other people's journey. You never know what they have going on behind the scenes. And the biggest thing is comparison destroys self-respect. That's why it's important not to get caught up in comparing yourself. If you're gonna compare yourself to anything, compare yourself to who you were five years ago or 10 years ago. That's the best, that's the best person you could possibly compare yourself to, the old version of yourself. There will always be someone ahead of you. There will always be someone behind you. So run your race, whatever that looks like. Now, as I get ready to bring this in for a landing, remember this. At the end of the day, you'll spend more time with yourself than anyone else on Earth. You will hear your own voice more than any podcast, more than any mentor or teacher, and the question becomes is that voice helping you grow or holding you back? Because the most important relationship you'll ever have, again, it's not with your spouse. It isn't with your money, your audience. It's the relationship you have with yourself. And when that relationship becomes stronger, healthier, more supportive, everything else in your life begins to change. So I'll say this as I close out. Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship in your life. Learn to trust yourself, respect yourself, and speak to yourself like someone worth becoming. Ladies and gentlemen, breakfast is served. If you got value from today's Breakfast Club session, drop a comment. Drop a V for value, like, comment, share, tag someone who can get value from today's Breakfast Club. Definitely appreciate all the shares, and make sure you follow me on Instagram @theworldtraveler. Follow the podcast. Leave a review. I truly appreciate all the love, all the support. It's what gets me up every single Tuesday morning to be on live with you all. And, uh, again, if you got value from today's session, definitely drop a comment. Um, for those of you who, uh, have been asking me for a complimentary coaching session, free one-on-one coaching session throughout the week, just DM me the word coach. I'll send you my booking link. I may have a few slots throughout the week, so, um, I'll send it over to you once you DM me. Uh, make sure you send that DM right now. My me- my inbox does get flooded, but all in all, looking forward to con- connecting with many of you guys throughout the week, and I'll be seeing you all next Tuesday. Take care, guys. Breakfast is served.