Practice Over Perfection: Faithful Steps Toward Your Dream

Have you been holding back, waiting for the perfect plan or just the right timing to go after a dream? 

In this episode, I sit down with my longtime friend Erin Straza for an honest conversation about what it actually looks like to start something when you don't feel qualified, confident, or certain it's going to work.

We talk about the real cost of perfectionism and why it will knock you out every time if you let it.

In this episode we dig into:

• Why the momentum you're looking for comes from starting, not from waiting until you feel ready
• How a simple outline, even just two to four things written down, can break the grip of feeling stuck
• Why treating your early attempts as practice, not performance, changes everything

One of the things Erin said that I keep coming back to is that we champion a child’s first steps because we're on the outside looking in and we know it’s bound to happen. We need that same encouragement too.

If you're in a season where you feel stuck and you're longing for women who will walk with you toward your dream, I want you to know that's exactly why I built Dream Believers. It's a community of women who love Jesus, ask good questions, and show up for each other through the messy, faithful middle. 

Learn more at merrittonsa.com/dreambelievers

And remember, the goal was never to be perfect. The goal is to be faithful to what God has given you right now.

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MORE ABOUT THE DEVOTED DREAMERS PODCAST:
Produced by Jonathan R. Clauson.
Theme music by Reaktor Productions.
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Transcript

Merritt Onsa [00:00:00]:

In my community, we talk about this mindset of it's just practice. Like whatever you attempt, just take it as practice. It's not performance. It's not up on stage. It's just, you know, it's the first or the second or the third time you're trying this. It's just, you're just going to practice it. Welcome to Season 14 of the Devoted Dreamers Podcast. I'm Merritt Onsa, and this season, instead of traditional interviews, I'm inviting trusted friends to have real conversations about what it looks like to pursue a God-shaped dream in the second half of life.

Merritt Onsa [00:00:38]:

These are honest, thoughtful conversations about faith, doubt, growth, and the very ordinary steps it takes to move forward when you have a God-shaped dream. 

Today, I'm joined by my longtime friend, Erin Straza, a writer, a nonprofit communications consultant, and someone who's experienced meaningful shifts in her calling over the last decade. 

I've broken up this conversation with Erin into 4 separate topics, which I'm planning to share over 4 weeks. That's going to be our cadence here in 2026 as I experiment with this whole concept of visiting co-hosts. Thanks for coming along for the ride. 

In this episode, we're talking about pursuing practice over perfection, how to find courage to start before you feel ready, and why a little bit of structure might be the very thing that helps you move forward. Let's dive in. 

Merritt Onsa [00:01:31]:

There was one thing I wanted to mention about your book. You told me the other day that you came to one of my calls and one of the gals on the call was like, wait, pulled out her book that you had written and was like, is this you?

Erin Straza [00:01:40]:

It was, it was so surprising and so sweet. I, I just still feel so honored that anyone would read an entire book of things that I had to say. And, um, I mean, books are so weird because they take so much time, and then they take so much time to publish, and then they take so much time to get out in the world, and then they're just out there. And it's like the snapshot of time. And I'm like, I'm not that same person who was writing in 2014 and '15 and '16, and the book came out in '17. Like, I'm not that person. And I bet a lot of my ideas have changed, and yet it's still out there. And I think it's a testament to, um, we are people who are not static, and we aren't like in one spot, and we, we change, and ideas change, um, and the learning along the way is just so, so worth it.

Erin Straza [00:02:41]:

Um, and the people you get to talk to about these ideas and engage with the ideas and what do you think about that? Like, oh, I just love all of it. 

Merritt Onsa [00:02:49]:

Yeah.

Hearing you say that, I feel like, um, that idea that we are not static beings, that we are constantly changing and that we're different than we were 10 years ago, that that should actually be a hopeful thing. You know, like that's actually exciting. Like when we think about, you know, young kids, like my 7-year-old is no longer a toddler and there are days when I miss that tiny little voice that she had.

Erin Straza [00:03:17]:

Oh my gosh.

Merritt Onsa [00:03:18]:

You know, I'm like, oh, if I could just go back there for a minute. But I also love the, like the little mature child that I am seeing come out in her and I don't know, I just think it would be so fruitful for us to consider that as we step into a dream, whatever those early steps might be, that it's, it's going to play a role in how we change over time and who we're going to become in 5, 10, 20 years. So the value of starting and not waiting for the bubbly, glittery, hopeful thing to just appear. You know, I just think there's so much, um, value in beginning.

Erin Straza [00:04:11]:

Yes. Like taking that risk, um, and to start even when you don't know what it's going to be like and you don't know, you don't know if you have the skills, you don't know if you have the ability, you don't know if this is going to be the way the story ends, you know, all of those things. Um, being able to start. And to me, it's like the courage and the bravery. I just think, oh my goodness, we've like, if we could see it in that way of saying yes and starting and taking a step toward the thing that you're like, maybe, maybe this is something I'm going to try. Um, I mean, like you said, with kids, I feel like we see that and we champion it because it's like, we're the adults looking at them and being like, Oh, look at you. You're, you're figuring out how to stand on one foot or whatever. You're like, that's so cute.

Erin Straza [00:05:06]:

You're going to do it. Cause we know that, you know, most kids, they're going to be able to do it. Um, and I think that we don't have that ability looking at ourselves of like, you're going to be able to do this and it's probably going to be different than you think, but it's going to be good and it's going to lead to something. Um, But yeah, being able to take those first steps, I'm like, oh, the courage. Yeah.

Merritt Onsa [00:05:32]:

Yes.

Erin Straza [00:05:33]:

All of it.

Merritt Onsa [00:05:35]:

The courage and the nerves.

Erin Straza [00:05:37]:

Yeah. My goodness.

Merritt Onsa [00:05:39]:

Well, and again, I will say that us sitting down today to do this co-host thing is so new. It, it doesn't seem like from the outside, I think like such a big deal. You're just going to have a conversation, but I've gone and looked at a couple of people who do their podcasts like this. And the first one that was recommended to me, I was like, okay, I see the concept. Yeah, I am nothing like that person whose podcast this is. And so there's a little bit of like, whoo, do I even have a clue what to do or how? 

Um, and then I did the procrastinating of how do I— Erin wanted the outline. I don't have it out. I just— maybe tomorrow, maybe tomorrow.

Merritt Onsa [00:06:29]:

Um, So I do want to talk about like, how do we start something when we, um, feel like we lack the courage, maybe the insight, like we don't know where it's going to go. I don't know that people are going to like this format. I'm just taking a guess here.

Erin Straza [00:06:50]:

Um, being willing to try and how do you, how do you take those steps forward? I mean. I think for me, like my, um, I talked about before, like my stuckness, like I can be stuck because I'm so busy, like, oh, it's going to be great out there. Not realizing like today it means you got to do something. 

Um, I feel like one of the things that really helps me is, um, even though I'm not a verbal processor, it really does help me to talk it out with someone because it's almost like I'm running off my nervous energy and it gives me clarity. And also like the cheerleading and the soundboard response, you know, I feel like it's, it's always what I need is to have somebody that I can be like, this is where I am and I want to take these steps. I'm feeling a little stuck. I don't know how to start. And then always the person outside of you is going to say, oh, you need to do this, this, and this this week.

You can do that. It's like, oh, okay.

Merritt Onsa [00:07:57]:

Yeah.

Erin Straza [00:07:57]:

I don't have to arrive at the thing, you know, way down the road. I've got to do the things today. Like, what are these things today? And just having it broken down, I feel like that always helps me.

Merritt Onsa [00:08:13]:

If you've been listening to this thinking, I would love to have more conversations like this. I want you to know that's exactly what goes on inside Dream Believers. 

If God has given you an assignment where you get to use your gifts, talents, and life experiences for his kingdom, it was never meant to be carried alone. We need other women around us who love Jesus, who ask wise questions, who can help us see clearly and remind us of who we are in him when the fear begins to rise up. 

Dream Believers is a community built on consistent gatherings with the right women, honest conversations about the highs and lows of pursuing a dream, and taking faithful steps forward together, even when our dreams look completely different. We really do need one another, and that's why I built Dream Believers. 

If you're curious about what this could look like for you, learn more at Merrittonsa.com/dreambelievers. I'd love to invite you to walk with us. 

Merritt Onsa [00:09:12]:

Yeah, like for me, all I needed to do was like, I knew I wanted us to talk about 4 things, you know, like I could just write topic 1, topic 2, topic 3, topic— like it was that basic. 

And then this is just going to be the real story here. I did this, um, in the car yesterday. I typed out what I thought, like, expanded on from the swimming notes. Yes. Um, like I'm typing out in the backseat of the car what I think we might talk about. Um, you know, I, I think I even sent you an email when I got home that was like, thoughts, you know, like, like you don't have to really do anything, but I know you would like to know what my thoughts are before we get on the call. Um, and I just kept pushing up against the, um, this doesn't feel done yet. I'm afraid to send it to her. 

Erin Straza [00:10:14]:

Oh my gosh. Yes. The expectations that we have on ourselves to deliver some glorious thing at every turn, when is that the necessary? Like, what is the real end goal? The real end goal is that we're going to talk about some things that I think are highly relatable and everybody feels this way. And by talking about it together, we will all feel better and be able to take steps and to see things change and shape and evolve. But instead, we want, I don't know, it's like we've got in our minds, we've got to have some, like, I don't know, like a presentation and a—

Merritt Onsa [00:10:52]:

we think we're like, we're heart surgeons that there's only one way to fix this. And then if not, they're going to die.

Erin Straza [00:10:59]:

Sure. That was it.

Merritt Onsa [00:11:01]:

Yes, I love that. A little bit of structure. Like, I started with text some things to myself, then open a Google Doc, and with trepidation hit the share button and copy that link and send it to Erin. And then this morning when I saw your response, because I was like, okay, she's an hour ahead, so she'll probably get it, you know, with plenty of time. It was like Oh, deep breath. Okay. It sounds like I'm on the right track.

Erin Straza [00:11:30]:

I liked what you said about you're, you're writing some things down. Um, I, I need to see like an outline or a structure or something. And anytime I feel stuck and I feel like I don't know where to start, it's like if I could just write down 2 to 4 things that it's like, just write these things down and get them in front of you so that you have something to work with. That makes such a difference. And so it's like a simple outline. So helpful.

Merritt Onsa [00:12:07]:

Um, it can change. It can change later. 

Erin Straza [00:12:11]:

It's okay. You're just writing some things down. It's all right. Um, even like when I feel stuck or like I'm avoiding, cause I don't want to face like, what if I'm not? Gonna be great. Um, I always tell myself, you're, you're only doing 15 minutes. Like, put in a solid 15 minutes. And usually by that time, I'm like, oh, you know what you're doing. Like, you've got ideas here. Yeah.

Merritt Onsa [00:12:38]:

And it clicks in.

Erin Straza [00:12:38]:

Like, oh, okay. I'm, I'm now, you know, I've got some momentum. Things are moving forward, but it's just getting started that it's just like, oh my gosh, I just need help. I need, I need someone to give me that little push. So, talking, I mean, I always find talking with you is such a big help. I need someone to be like, oh no, you, you have this, you can do this.

Um, being willing just to start something, put something down. Um, and then that's progress.

Merritt Onsa [00:13:10]:

It's like, yes. Well, and I think there's also value in like seeing yourself doing it.

Erin Straza [00:13:16]:

Like, oh yeah, I am.

Merritt Onsa [00:13:18]:

I am actually doing it. And in my community, we talk about like this mindset of it's just practice. Like whatever you attempt, just take it as practice. It's not performance. It's not up on stage. It's just, you know, it's the first or the second or the third time you're trying this. It's just, you're just going to practice it. And we know that the things that we practice, we clearly get better at.

Erin Straza [00:13:44]:

Yeah. No. And so I like that a lot. That's different than like, um, I need to show up ready to be perfect. Like, that's not what we're doing here, right?

Merritt Onsa [00:13:59]:

That perfectionism will knock you out of the park every time.

Erin Straza [00:14:03]:

Much.

Merritt Onsa [00:14:04]:

It is. It is. And I, well, and I think the other thing that perfectionism does is um, causes us to evaluate something too soon. So like when you're just making your outline, you're like, I am just making an outline. It's just, it can change. You know, my notes for today, like clearly on the fly, our conversation is going to have its own nuance and sidetracks and all those things. And, um, perfection makes us think, oh. It's not going the way that I thought.

I should stop now. Or, you know, or I'll come back to this later when I, you know, am feeling more creative.

Erin Straza [00:14:46]:

Yeah.

Merritt Onsa [00:14:47]:

Well, when does that ever actually happen? You know, like I'm going to sit here and feel creative.

Erin Straza [00:14:55]:

I mean, we don't have that sense of like, what is that, like the 10,000 hours until you are the expert or whatever that is. Or like how many times did, I don't know, some inventor failed at something and I can't remember the reference.

Merritt Onsa [00:15:11]:

Thomas Edison and the light bulb. Whatever that was.

Erin Straza [00:15:14]:

But it's like, I, it's not like we're keeping a record like a scientist, like, oh, this is number 345 out of 1,001. And you still have, you know, math is not my thing, 700 something to go. And so you just have to keep putting in, like put in the reps. You know, that's what people say is you're just putting in the reps. And if you have that mindset of like. Oh, I'm, I'm doing this thing and it doesn't have to be perfect. I'm starting. I'm, I'm getting the momentum.

I'm getting the energy. I'm moving it forward. There's so much value in that. And I, I don't know why we downplay that, like, or belittle it, belittle it, I guess. Um, because that practice, you're learning something in it. Um, the inventor is learning what works and what doesn't work. Um, and you'll need that on down the road.

Merritt Onsa [00:16:03]:

Yeah. Yeah. Which is actually completely acceptable in inventing things.

Erin Straza [00:16:08]:

Yes.

Merritt Onsa [00:16:09]:

That you have to fail.

Erin Straza [00:16:10]:

You're going to have to fail with that. It's like, oh yeah. Yeah. We don't really look at it that way.

Merritt Onsa [00:16:16]:

And it's funny though, if I look at you and the things that you're attempting, I don't go, oh, Erin, bless your heart. I can't believe you tried that.

Erin Straza [00:16:28]:

Oh my goodness.

Merritt Onsa [00:16:28]:

How could you think that would work? I mean, that is not the voice of the friend and the fellow dreamer. You know, somebody outside of you is going to be like, oh my gosh, like, you know, 10 years ago, like, oh my gosh, you like podcasted and you've never done that before?

Erin Straza [00:16:45]:

That's amazing.

Merritt Onsa [00:16:46]:

Good job.

Erin Straza [00:16:47]:

You know?

Merritt Onsa [00:16:48]:

Yeah.

Erin Straza [00:16:48]:

And we needed to be that for each other because that's not the typical thing that's running through our brains.

Merritt Onsa [00:16:55]:

No, we're— look at you. At least for us Enneagram Ones, we're like, you did terrible today. It's like, no, no. I mean, wouldn't that— like, the goal— is the goal to be perfect, or is the goal to just be faithful to what God has given you for right now? Yeah, because he hasn't actually given that like little bubbly perfect dream of 10 years from now. Yeah, you know, maybe, you know, the idea, the creativity of what's possible he put within you, but he's not like, oh, here's the rigid plan you must follow in order to get there.

Erin Straza [00:17:36]:

And if you mess it up, well, I guess we're just gonna toss that whole thing out.

Merritt Onsa [00:17:41]:

Yeah, we're so hard on ourselves.

Erin Straza [00:17:43]:

It's so sad.

Merritt Onsa [00:17:45]:

Yeah. If you've been waiting to feel motivated before you begin taking steps on your dream, maybe this episode is your reminder that the momentum you're looking for comes as a result of taking action, not before. 

Despite what it might feel like, you don't need a perfect plan to begin. You don't need a magical burst of confidence. You might just need 15 minutes and a willingness to call it practice. Every small step is shaping you into the kind of woman who follows through. 

And next week, to wrap up this conversation, Erin and I are going deeper into the faith aspect of dreaming with God. We're talking about identity, renewing your mind, and why it matters to name the dream God has placed on your heart out loud.

Until then, keep taking the next faithful step. I'll be right here, cheering you on.