Say Your Dream Out Loud Before You Talk Yourself Out of It

~ What if the thing standing between you and your dream is simply that you have never said it out loud?

In this episode, my friend and co-host Erin Straza and I get honest about what it actually takes to go after something that feels bigger than you. We talk about renewing your mind, knowing who God says you are, and why speaking the dream matters more than having a perfect plan to follow.

Before we close out the conversation with Erin, she shares a story about her husband Mike, a 56-year-old competitive runner whose coach challenged him to name a time goal he had been too afraid to voice. That moment was a game-changer and sheds light on how we think about a God-shaped dream.

In this conversation, we’re talking about:

• The daily choice to set your mind on life and light instead of fear and doubt
• Why knowing you are a beloved daughter of God is the foundation
• How saying the dream out loud is an act of faith rather than pride

You do not have to say it publicly or post it online, but you do need to say it to someone you trust. That is exactly why I built Dream Believers, a community where women pursue God-shaped dreams together, are honest about the highs and lows, and remind each other who we are in Him. Learn more and join today: https://www.merrittonsa.com/dreambelievers.

The dream God placed in you was never meant to stay hidden. Sometimes we think we need to see the whole path before we can take the next step, but that’s simply not true. Your job is to be faithful to what is right in front of you today.

🔗 Connect with Erin Straza

• Website: erinstraza.com/ 
• LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/erinstraza/ 

Devoted Dreamers is hosted by Merritt Onsa — Christian life coach, mentor, speaker, and founder of Dream Believers. New episodes drop every week for the woman who believes her best chapter isn't behind her.

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Produced by Jonathan R. Clauson.
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Transcript

Merritt Onsa [00:00:00]:

There's something special about actually knowing what we want, actually being willing to trust our Father enough that He could give us something that is wildly outside the realm of anything we feel capable of, and that it would be okay to go after it. 

Welcome to Season 14 of the Devoted Dreamers Podcast. I'm Merritt Onsa, and this season, instead of traditional interviews, I'm inviting trusted friends to have real conversations about what it looks like to pursue a God-shaped dream in the second half of life. 

These are honest, thoughtful conversations about faith, doubt, growth, and the very ordinary steps it takes to move forward when you have a God-shaped dream. 

Today I'm joined by my longtime friend, Erin Straza. A writer, a nonprofit communications consultant, and someone who's experienced meaningful shifts in her calling over the last decade. 

I've broken up this conversation with Erin into 4 separate topics, which I'm planning to share over 4 weeks.

Merritt Onsa [00:01:14]:

That's going to be our cadence here in 2026 as I experiment with this whole concept of visiting co-hosts. Thanks for coming along for the ride. 

In this final episode with Erin, we're getting into the nitty gritty of faith as it relates to going after a big dream. We're talking about renewing your mind, remembering who you are in Christ, and why it matters to say out loud the dream God has placed on your heart. Let's dive in. 

So for you, like when you don't feel confident about something that you're trying, is there like, forget the default negative voices, like in your, in your best self of believing in yourself and what's possible. What does that look like? 

What do you, what do you need to be on that train track versus the other?

Erin Straza [00:02:10]:

That is so good. I think, um, I mean, it really is that whole battle of renewing the mind to what is good and lovely and pure and wonderful and everything that that God holds out as life and light. The brain is the problem and the brain is where the work happens. And I think for me, it is learning how to incorporate walking with God with my daily work. And starting the day with what am I going to be thinking about today? What's on my mind today? And is it life and light or is it death and curse, curses? You know, which is it that I'm going to choose? I feel like God's always holding that out like Moses, like I hold before you today blessings and life or death and curses. Which one are you going to pick? 

Um, and setting my mind on life and light and blessing. Um, you know, not that I'm manifesting it or whatever, the woo-woo part, but it is a little bit like, well, I get to pick what am I going to focus on? And I, so that mindset part is huge. The renewing of my mind to what is it that God has.

Erin Straza [00:03:41]:

But I think the other part of it is, um, the person who I want to be and the things that I want to achieve, those things happen when I'm behaving like a certain type of person. 

And so I'm always filling in the blank. Be the type of person who whatever… Like if I want to be that person who on down the road has a bubbly dream, I need to be that sort of person now. Like I have to practice it. I have to try. I have to get my mind thinking that way and, um, ask God to meet me in it and to help me practice being that person. I'm not naturally like a, um, structured sort.

Erin Straza [00:04:31]:

And so that's why I love reading about the science of habits because I'm so bad at it. So I'm obsessed with like rhythms and patterns and habits. Like I just think it's like, wow, how is this happening? Um, And so I, for me, I have to have structure because otherwise I won't have it. 

Whereas I think other people who are naturally structured, their thing is they can't get away from it. And so, you know, depending on your personality, structure can either be your life preserver or your noose. You know, if you, it's one or the other. I am the person where it's like, oh, this is my safety harness because otherwise I'll just be floating free. 

Erin Straza [00:05:15]:

I need structure to get anything done. And so, um, I always think of the type of person I want to be needs a certain type of pattern and rhythm and how can I get any little bit of that going today? And so that's what I need. Those are the things that I need. I need, I need guardrails. I need structure. I need, you know, the to-do list that I just keep writing over and over again, but it helps me to get some things done by the end of the week. Yeah.

Merritt Onsa [00:05:46]:

And a renewed mind.

Erin Straza [00:05:47]:

Yes. Oh my goodness. Lord, help me. What do you find is helpful for you? What resources and helps get you where you want to be?

Merritt Onsa [00:06:01]:

I well, you're talking about, um, whether you're a structured person or not. I think that I thrive on the going to my list and knowing what needs to be done. Yeah. Um, but that also kind of leaves out the creativity piece of it. 

I'm trying to think of like a specific example of like you and I could have gotten on this call today and just talked, you know, or I could have published a previous conversation we had unprepared for podcast publishing. But, um, but it does help me to have the guardrails to know, um, these are the, these are the ways that I want to operate. Also because someone else is involved, like, it's a kindness to help you know what the plan is.

Merritt Onsa [00:06:58]:

I'm already worried in my head about what do I do with the next person that I do this with, but that's a worry for another day.

Erin Straza [00:07:05]:

That's right.

Merritt Onsa [00:07:06]:

Um, Yeah, but yeah, you know, I was thinking as you were talking, um, that, uh, being the kind of person— like, I love Seth Godin's quote that's, um, I don't even know what book it's from, but it was like, people like us do things like this. So if I want to be a person— I know, it's so good.

Erin Straza [00:07:29]:

I like that.

Merritt Onsa [00:07:30]:

If I want to be a person that is a leader for other women I have to actually be willing to accept that title, as intimidating as that feels. If I want to point people to Christ in the work that I do, it means that I need to be spiritually healthy. I need to be nurturing not just, um, tactics, like not just time in the word, or not just going to church, though those things are highly important and I value them greatly. I need to know in the depths of my soul that I'm a beloved daughter of the King because my bent is to believe differently.

Erin Straza [00:08:17]:

Yes. Yeah.

Merritt Onsa [00:08:20]:

And for the longest time, I was like, I can see that in others and I'm not sure how they got that.

Like I just heard a Tim Keller sermon this week that was like, when you hear people pray, you get a glimpse into their relationship with the Father. There are people that—and I'm thinking of someone in particular that I know who, when she prays, I feel like I'm in on a secret conversation she's having with God because she's so—she seems so close to him. And not that it's a comparison, but a, like, I want to view my Father that way. I want to see him as, you know, the daddy to the little girl that still lives inside of me and knows without a shadow of a doubt that I am protected and cared for and held and loved. And there's nothing that I can do that's going to make him love me less. And there's nothing I can do to earn a greater love from him. It is complete and whole and solid and firm.

Merritt Onsa [00:09:30]:

And so if I am not at least exploring that idea, that relationship with him, I'm going to be, you know, floundering out there, um, needing that, needing that life, whatever, ring.

Erin Straza [00:09:49]:

Oh my gosh.

Merritt Onsa [00:09:51]:

Yeah.

Erin Straza [00:09:52]:

And I mean, to think of that as, um, you know, we're talking about like, what would you need to pursue the dream? I mean, that speaks of our abiding. And, um, if everything that we are able to do and create and accomplish comes from abiding. I think that knowing who God is and being so grounded and centered in that, that lines up with scripture so well, with, um, you know, the idea of being, um, in Christ and grounded in Christ and rooted in Christ. And I mean, that's just spot on. And where things should start. Yeah.

Merritt Onsa [00:10:48]:

Yeah.

Erin Straza [00:10:49]:

Really good, Merritt.

Merritt Onsa [00:10:54]:

If you've been listening to this thinking, I would love to have more conversations like this, I want you to know that's exactly what goes on inside Dream Believers. If God has given you an assignment where you get to use your gifts, talents, and life experiences for his kingdom, it was never meant to be carried alone. We need other women around us who love Jesus, who ask wise questions, who can help us see clearly and remind us of who we are in him when the fear begins to rise up. 

Dream Believers is a community built on consistent gatherings with the right women, honest conversations about the highs and lows of pursuing a dream, and taking faithful steps forward together, even when our dreams look completely different. We really do need one another, and that's why I built Dream Believers. 

If you're curious about what this could look like for you, learn more at merrittonsa.com/dreambelievers. I'd love to invite you to walk with us. 

Merritt Onsa [00:12:05]:

I've always thought, like, even from the beginning of Devoted Dreamers, that if we know who we are in him, if we know who he is, that's the, that's the basic foundation.

That those— that inner knowing of who he is and who he made us, um, is what empowers us to keep going towards something that is a complete unknown, you know, that will change over time, that we will have failures and flops and discouragement and want to quit. And it's really, um, you know, Devoted Dreamers has never been exactly about the dream, even though that's the thing that I talk about all the time. It really is about who we are in relation to him and trusting and listening to him. And, um, I think— I know we're getting close to time.

Erin Straza [00:12:47]:

Oh yes, see, I'll track.

Merritt Onsa [00:12:54]:

But I think there's also something, um, I was going to say holy, and maybe that's too holy a word, but there's something special about actually knowing what we want, actually being willing to trust our Father enough that he could give us something that is wildly outside the realm of anything we feel capable of.

Erin Straza [00:13:21]:

Yeah.

Merritt Onsa [00:13:22]:

And that it would be okay to go after it. And so it reminded me of that story that you shared about Mike. And his running.

Erin Straza [00:13:28]:

Oh my gosh.

Merritt Onsa [00:13:29]:

I would love to have you share that.

Erin Straza [00:13:31]:

I love it. So, um, for all of you that don't know Mike, you should, because he's great. But Mike is a competitive runner and has been. He's run since junior high. He ran competitively in college, and then he took an 18-year break. And then one day he's like, hey, I think I'm going to start running. And I'm like, okay, you know, here you are. Late 30s, I'm like, all right, you're going to run.

Erin Straza [00:13:56]:

But oh no, not just run. Like now he's going to train. And that's why we were out in Boulder because he had a professional elite coach and we would go out to Boulder in the summers and he would go train with, with the team. It was just wonderful. Um, so Mike has a coach now that is helping him to complete the World Marathon Circuits. And a lot of people do the World Marathon Circuits, these 6 marathons that are amazing.

Merritt Onsa [00:14:24]:

Wow.

Erin Straza [00:14:25]:

Um, but you know, Mike has time goals in mind. He, he doesn't want to just finish. He wants to hit a time goal and he's fast. Um, but he is now, he just turned 56. So, you know, time and age a little bit getting to him, but he's still very speedy. 

And his coach said, hey, you had a good New York race. What do you want to do for London? London's coming up this spring on this circuit. And Mike's kind of dodging the question, and the coach just says, just say it, what time do you want to hit? And he says, well, I have a time in mind, but I don't know that I can do it, and I don't want to say it because I don't think it's possible.

Erin Straza [00:15:11]:

And his coach said, are there people your age who are running this time? And Mike says, yeah. And the coach says, have you run this time? Mike's like, yeah, it's been a while, but yeah. And he's like, there's no question then. It's possible. And so therefore we're going to work toward it. And I just loved that it cracked open the what if. And like, it's worth trying, but you have to say it. I mean, that's— I have to put voice to the thing that it's like, Ooh, I would really love this.

Erin Straza [00:15:50]:

Yeah. It's not guaranteed. Yeah. I mean, but that's like where all the good stuff is, right? Where it's like, you're so alive and it's like, I so want to do it. Yeah. It's, it's a cool, cool challenge for a runner, for a dreamer, for a writer, for, you know, for someone who wants to start a business or, you know. I don't know, climb a mountain.

Merritt Onsa [00:16:15]:

But I mean, yeah, yes, it's so powerful. And you don't have to say it like publicly on a stage or on social media. 

Erin Straza: 

Right? 

Merritt Onsa: 

But I love the like challenge to not let the whatever the little voice is saying, yeah, um, keep you from admitting, because that's what it is, confessing. I have this heart to do this thing. And I think we're fearful of, you know, we're fearful of failure if we name it, like Mike said, um, we're fearful of what somebody might think if we name it and then in front of them, don't do it.

Erin Straza [00:16:56]:

Who are you to think that you can do that?

Merritt Onsa [00:16:58]:

Well, yeah. Um, oh, I just think it's so powerful to be willing to admit that in a, you know, in a closed circuit.

Erin Straza [00:17:09]:

I don't know. Like, yeah.

Merritt Onsa [00:17:11]:

But find somebody you trust.

Erin Straza [00:17:13]:

I didn't name his time. I'm not outing him.

Merritt Onsa [00:17:14]:

I know. Yeah, it's good.

Erin Straza [00:17:15]:

But if he makes it at London, I will, I will come back and let y'all know.

Merritt Onsa [00:17:20]:

I can't wait.

I can't wait.

Merritt Onsa [00:17:22]:

Um, but we need people willing to say, um, like ask those questions. Has somebody ever done this? Is it possible? Like you're not asking to breathe in outer space.

Erin Straza [00:17:33]:

Exactly.

Merritt Onsa [00:17:34]:

Is it possible? Shown by somebody else having accomplished it? Have you done something similar? And, and maybe the answer is no, but I would bet that if you looked into your story, you would see times where you acted with courage or did something outside your comfort zone or took a risk that was, you know, worth taking, whether you accomplished the thing or maybe didn't, but you learned so much.

Erin Straza [00:18:08]:

Yeah.

Merritt Onsa [00:18:09]:

So being willing and brave enough to ask and answer that question is so valuable. So thank you, Mike, for letting us use your story.

Erin Straza [00:18:19]:

And we need people to ask us these questions. Sometimes it's hard to even know what is it that I really want? I don't even know. Oh yeah. To have these conversations and to dream. I mean, I love that because I, I mean, such a fit for what you're doing. Like, devoted dreamers. Like, let's, let's dream and think about what if.

Merritt Onsa [00:18:42]:

Yeah.

Erin Straza [00:18:43]:

Yeah, I love it.

Merritt Onsa [00:18:45]:

Well, it's really fun to get to think about those things with you on a practical level. Erin and I do monthly co-working together, so we spend like half a day just kind of touching base as we work through our projects for the day, and to get to do that here at more of a high level, um, sharing that conversation with others, so such a blessing and a gift that you would come and be my first visiting co-host. Thank you so much.

Erin Straza [00:19:15]:

I'm so glad I got to be here. So fun. 

Merritt Onsa [00:19:19]:

Me too.

Um, well, so this is my experiment. I am just, you know, it's all just practice. Let's see, let's see how the series of visiting co-host goes for the Devoted Dreamers podcast. 

If you're out there listening today, and if there's anything that resonated with you, I would love to hear from you. I would love to know what struck a chord for you, or maybe where you're asking yourself some questions based on the conversation that Erin and I had today. I am not far away, so let's connect and talk about your dream. And your journey as a devoted dreamer. Thank you, Erin.

If there's something stirring in your heart, something that feels bigger than you, maybe even a little scary, don't dismiss it or hide from it. Instead, pay attention, because our Father in Heaven delights in you and calls you his daughter. He is not careless in entrusting dreams to his children. And He doesn't make mistakes, which means you get to choose what happens next. You don't have to see the whole path or have it all figured out before you begin. Just be faithful to what's right in front of you right now and keep taking the next faithful step. 

I'll be right here cheering you on.