013: What Jesus Taught Us About Influence (A Soulful Christmas Eve Episode)

Influence doesn’t have to be loud, public, or polished. Jesus showed us that the most transformative impact often begins quietly, in hidden places where nobody is keeping score. 

In this Christmas Eve reflection, we explore what His life teaches us about presence, humility, and the kind of influence that changes people without ever trying to impress them. 

This episode is an invitation to rest, breathe, and remember that the way you’re building your business matters deeply.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why Jesus’ influence began in obscurity (and why that matters for your business)
• The difference between impression and impact
• How quiet influence builds trust, depth, and longevity
• What to remember when your work feels slow, unseen, or “small”
• How to carry this truth into your next season of life and business

Get Your Free Action Guide: Quiet Influence: A 5-Minute Reflection for Heart-Centered Entrepreneurs

Join the Smart Soulful Business Facebook Community: www.smartbusiness.thrivecart.com/soulful-strategy-community

Rate, Review, & Follow Becky & Laurie on Apple Podcasts

"I love Laurie & Becky and the Smart Soulful Business Podcast!!" << If that's like you, please consider rating and reviewing our show! This helps Smart Soulful Business support and reach more people -- just like you! Click here, scroll to the bottom, tap to rate with five stars, and select “Write a Review.” Then, let us know what you loved most about this episode!

Also, if you haven’t done so already, follow the podcast. This is the best way to stay updated on the new episodes we release weekly. If you’re not following, there’s a good chance you’ll miss out on future episodes. Follow now!

SUBSCRIBE & REVIEW

If you loved this episode, please take a moment to subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts! Your support helps us reach more Christian women who need to hear this.

🎙 Thanks for tuning in to Smart Soulful Business Podcast! See you next week!

MORE FROM BECKY & LAURIE

Website: smartsoulfulbusiness.com
Instagram: instagram.com/smartsoulfulbusiness
Facebook: facebook.com/smartsoulfulbusiness
Pinterest: pinterest.com/smartsoulfulbusiness
Smart Soulful Business Facebook Community: smartbusiness.thrivecart.com/soulful-strategy-community

Transcript

Becky Brown  0:01 
If you're a Christian woman, building a business and want it to be purposeful and profitable, we've got you covered. I'm Becky.

Laurie Graham  0:08 
And I'm Laurie. We have both built successful businesses that we love without losing our faith, humor or our sanity. This is Smart Soulful Business.

Becky Brown  0:17 
Real conversations to help your business fit your life and not the other way around.

Laurie Graham  0:27 
Hey, welcome back to Smart Soulful Business with Becky and Laurie. It's Christmas Eve. If you are listening live, welcome to Christmas Eve. And if you're listening later, maybe take a breath. This episode is going to be a little bit more reflective, and so if you're at another time in space, this episode is just a little bit different. We're going to be talking about Jesus, shockingly enough, on Christmas Eve, and what He taught us about influence, because influence doesn't need to be loud, public or even polished, as we're all building businesses where we are, whether we work out of our home office or a kitchen or a living room floor, or whether you have a team or no team, or you're starting out with an idea, or you're already making 5, 6, 7 figures. Jesus showed us that the most transformative impact begins quietly, oftentimes in hidden places where nobody is keeping score. So if your work feels slow or unseen lately, or if your business is in a tender season or a hard season, this conversation is going to feel like a deep exhale. The free Action Guide that goes along with this episode is called Quiet Influence, a five-minute reflection for heart centered entrepreneurs, we want you to download that. We want you to sit with that after this episode is done, it's just something gentle you can do any time that you need grounding. So let's get into it. I keep thinking about the way Jesus arrived, not on a platform, not in some palace or some fancy place, not with a spotlight, not with a microphone. His influence began in obscurity, like total obscurity, quiet, unhurried, unimpressive by any human metric. And I think for entrepreneurs, especially heart centered ones, we talk about that a lot our smart, soulful business, it's kind of a permission slip like, what if the work that feels slow is actually the work that's forming us? Becky. How does that sit with you? Like, what if the work that feels slow is actually the work that's forming us?

Becky Brown  2:55 
You know, I think what that brings up in me as you ask that question is just the unintentional expectations, sometimes the unspoken expectations that we're setting for ourselves, not only in how we should begin, where we should begin, what that those first steps should look like, but also where we should be now, and we almost live in the shoulds, instead of where we are. I was just talking to a friend last night about how Jesus often leads us so differently than we would take ourselves right, on different paths. So we think that the whole goal is to get to the answer, to get to that spot where we're making our income goals to get to, like, have everything up and running and ready, like, that's the goal is the solution. And so often, the refining, the growing, the influence happens on the journey. It's, it's the process of learning and growing. And there's, there's a lot of value in the process that I think we often minimize.

Laurie Graham  4:06 
Yeah, and I think even me asking you that question, like, what if the work that feels slow is actually forming us? It's so funny, the older I get, the more I slowed down my work. Yeah. Like when I was in my 20s and 30s, I was like this, you know, crazed, productive, like, everything, blah, blah, blah. And now I actually look for the slowness, like, if it's going too fast, I will intentionally go, 'wait a minute, what's going on?' Because I know God is everywhere, but I definitely hear Him more in the slowness, in the quiet.

Becky Brown  4:38 
Yeah, for sure, making that space for be still.

Laurie Graham  4:43 
Yeah, yeah. Be still and know that I am God. Baby, lying in a manger.

Becky Brown  4:49 
Yeah, yeah. And, you know, it's interesting because Jesus wasn't trying to impress anybody, He wasn't managing an image. He actually spent a lot of His lifetime kind of trying to break the expectations that people had of who they thought He was supposed to be, who He was supposed to come as. He wasn't necessarily trying to look like this leader, this king, that everybody had in their minds, He was living from His identity, from who He knew He was. There was so much humility that wasn't smallness, but it was this quiet strength and power and truth that He carried from the manger throughout His entire life, and what, what do you think humility looks like in our businesses? What does that look like in the process of growth that we're talking about here?

Laurie Graham  5:54 
It's so interesting because when you were even talking about like, not trying to manage an image, or trying to look like a leader, or trying to impress. Like, I think as humans, we all have a little bit of that, right? Like, I know you and I have both talked about, like, the people pleasing aspect. And I think there's part of a good thing about, like, wanting to meet the needs of people. And, yes, but how we show up as people, right? Like when you talk about humility, when you said that, what went through my mind is like, it's knowing who I am, as a child of God, as beautifully and wonderfully made and fearfully made, and like amazing and understanding that everyone else is that amazing. So to me, that's humility. Like, I know, a lot of times people talk about like, you know, like making other people higher than them, or understanding our worth. But to me, I think humility is knowing how amazing I am, that God created me. I know that sounds weird, doesn't it?

Becky Brown  7:00 
Well, no, so we just finished going through John in our Bible study at our church, and I can't even tell you how uncomfortable all of the teachers are with the number of times John says 'the disciple who Jesus loved', 'the one who Jesus loved', 'Jesus loved', claiming that, declaring that, living in that John knew God loved him. John knew Jesus loved him, and he wasn't afraid to say it over and over and over again. Yeah, so that's what I that's what came to mind as you were just talking.

Laurie Graham  7:30 
Because as I'm talking like I can't even believe I'm saying this on air, because you know me, I don't walk around thinking I'm all that, you know, I'm actually pretty self-deprecating, you know what I mean. But when I stop and think about like that God created me, but He created you and every single other person, I always remember this quote that I learned in my early 20s when I was going through a ministry training program. Sorry, I don't know who said it. It's somebody famous, but they said 'everyone is my superior in some way'. So it's almost like knowing how precious I am to God, but also knowing that every single person I meet, every other human, is created in God's image. Like this is an image-bearer, every client we serve, every person we send an email to, anybody we ever hear whine, or complain, or return a product, they're an image-bearer. You know, competitors in our industries, people who rub us the wrong way, like they're image-bearers. They're they're created by God with the same breath.

Becky Brown  8:36 
I think that's so important to remember in business too, is, is the humanity, especially if you run an online business, a lot of what we see is only the words that pop up on the screen. We are not hearing tone. We are not seeing hearts. We're not seeing intentions. We're not even seeing the facial expressions as they're sending us things. And so we're missing so much of the humanity of their wholeness as a person. And so I think it's so important that you're bringing that back into the equation, because as Christian business leaders, we should be treating everybody as image-bearers, as whole human beings, and not just wow, you're creating a lot of disturbance in my day today by like, asking for a refund on this product I was so clear about or having me go back and forth and back and forth with you on this and then competitors, you know, they're sleazy, and they're still earning all the money, and here I am doing the right thing, and I'm not selling as much, and so many different situations. But I just think that's so important. And, you know.

Laurie Graham  9:41 
With Jesus, you know what we're talking about Jesus, what Jesus taught us about influence, like as you were talking I'm thinking of the verse in Philippians even, you know, and Jesus, who was God, knew he was God. He did not know he was God, but He elevated other people. Like it was so beautiful. Like, could we be business owners, you know, and show up, but hold our hands open, right? Like, I want to show up. I want to show up. I want to stand in truth. I want to have convictions behind what I am selling. I am selling things, you know, but I want to have open hands, yeah. So interesting, goodness.

Becky Brown  10:24 
Yeah. Well, it is, it is, and it's, yeah. It's just important to continually consider, what does that look like. What does that look like for me to show up well in my business as somebody who knows who I am, yeah, like we talk a lot about lacking confidence, because for a lot of us, we're trying new things that we've never done before. So of course, we're not confident about doing the hard launch that we just talked about, or growing our email list, or these new things, but you can always be confident in being an image-bearer. So how are you reflecting God in your business to your audience. What does that look like? What character qualities are you reflecting to them? How are you magnifying God's goodness and faithfulness to your people? These are not specific things, because that could look a million different ways for all of us in our unique strengths and giftings and experiences, and it's such an important thing. You and I often ask ourselves, ask each other, how do we want to show up today? Who do we want to be? What are we striving towards? And that's when the specifics kind of fall away, right? It's not about, well, I'm going to write this one email. It's about, well, I actually would like to show tenderness to people today. You know? That's what we come back to, is those character qualities.

Laurie Graham  11:47 
Okay, I love that we're doing this episode, because every week, we're thinking of very specific strategies in business and and we're talking about smart and soulful. And it's so cool to talk about something so meaningful that you and I, Becky, talk about personally quite a bit more than we do live. So when we think about Jesus and what He taught us about influence, let's talk about impression and impact. Because this comes up in business a lot, the impressions we're making, the impact we're having.

Becky Brown  12:18 
Yeah, absolutely. And I would say impressions can be loud, they can be fast, they can be public. I think of social media, you know, we talk about impressions for yeah, social media posts, reels, promo, graphics, and I would say that impact is slow, it's steady, it's relational. And you know, in business, we often feel that pressure to perform for the impressions, like, how do I get more views? How do I get in front of more people? How do I play nice with the algorithms so that I can go viral and get in front of all these people? And that is part of the equation. But what we're really working toward is, is the impact. That's what we want in it. That's why you're doing this business. You want to create a slow, steady, lasting, relational impact with the people who are following you, right?

Laurie Graham  13:20 
Yeah, yeah. You know, impression kind of says, Look at me. Here's my impression, here's here, here I am. But impact is a little more like here's something real, yeah? And I don't think one negates the other. I mean, I'm not saying we shouldn't have an impression, right? But thinking of our last episode is the last one we did on Launch Strategies, yeah, that just went through my head. Jesus's first Launch Strategy was a reveal, like He came to manger. There was no hard launch there, you know, and then He had other times. He was making a big splash. He was doing miracles. He was feeding, yeah, exactly like. But then there's other times it's slow, and I think it gives us a lot of freedom, doesn't it? Like when we think of what Jesus taught us about influence, like a little bit of there's a season, there's a time.

Becky Brown  14:16 
You know, and you brought up people pleasing earlier, and I want to bring up self-confidence here, this self-esteem, self-confidence, that's been a big thing for me in business, that's been a big thing that's held me back in a lot of ways for a long time. That's been part of my process, right? And I've grown a lot in that area where I can today compared to when I started. I can so much more fully trust that God is equipping me to do the things that I can show up as who He created me to be, and I'm still learning who He created me to be, right? And there's a lot of shifting, and what I love about that is the continued relationship that we have with Jesus in that we are fully dependent on Him and responsive to okay, what are what are you leading me to do today? So I am somebody in my business, from the get go, my goal in business was to set up the perfect system so that I could set it on autopilot and walk away. That was my goal. Yeah, yeah. Not so great. It's happened like that, that belief that, that core belief of mine, that's how it should look, that's how it should work, and obviously I haven't perfected the system enough, if it's not working like that, that has been so frustrating for me along the way, because that's never worked like that. It's never. That is not how businesses work. Businesses work with real people. And I am continually changing and growing and getting better you and I talk about all the time, when we look back at the things you mentioned in, I think it was in the email podcast, how you had written an email, and you were like, Oh, this is gold. Like, I can't wait to reuse this. And, like, didn't take too much long before you looked back and you were like, I'm not gonna reuse that. What I'm writing now is so much better, right?

Laurie Graham  16:13 
Yeah, it's so interesting how our businesses change and change us, like we said, they change us, like, doing or doing changes. I was thinking of Jesus again, because it's Christmas Eve, and I was just thinking like, He didn't meet anybody's expectations. Like, we're so concerned about, I'll just make it about me. I'm so concerned about meeting people's expectations. You know, people expected the Messiah to come in, you know, like, like, the Messiah, like crowned, like they're waiting for a king. And they expected that. Jesus didn't give them that. And if you think about the people you serve, some of them are not wanting polished. Some of them are not wanting. Well, I don't know if that's true. I think most are wanting the Five Miracle Steps, right? But the deeper impact, when we talk about impression impact, the deeper impact is, is us, is our presence, is the slower, steadier thing. So when we feel like that pressure to perform or meet people's expectations, like, can we just slow down a little bit and learn from Jesus? He came in totally different than everybody else expected. But he was consistent. He was solid, He was caring, he was kind, he was patient, you know, like, think of how Jesus, like, walked around the planet, wow. How would our businesses be if we actually modeled, modeled that like, it's pretty beautiful, isn't it?

Becky Brown  17:38 
It really is. Yeah. And what would that look like to give yourself full permission to be who you are and not who you wish you were not, yeah, not Amy Porterfield, not Carly Campbell on Pinterest. What would that look like for you to fully be you in your business and impact your audience as you.

Laurie Graham  18:01 
Yeah, and growth like, let people see your growth like, Be okay with where we're at and grow into who God is growing us to be like, I feel like, so I'm 55 and be 56. No, I am 56 and I think, I think people have seen me grow up in the past five, six years, like through business, but my voice is even different, like my earlier podcast, oh my gosh, I was blah, blah, blah, you know what I mean? Like, I think we can give people permission, or ourselves permission, to kind of be who we are and and grow up in business in front of people.

Becky Brown  18:44 
Interesting. Yeah.

Laurie Graham  18:46 
When you said be who you are, I was like, Well, I don't want to stay who I am. Because, yes, you know, you know, there's some issues there, right? And so, but I think that being human, and I don't know, I think when we show up as we are, I think it gives people permission to also show up as they are.

Becky Brown  19:04 
And offer what you have. So as you were talking, I struggle with really bad insomnia. I have for six years now, and one of the things on my insomnia journey that's been so impactful for me is the story of the Widow's Mite in Scripture and offering all that you have. When you offer all that you have, that level of surrender and trust, that level of relationship with Jesus, that is when God multiplies your impact. God multiplies what you have. It's, you're not just giving him widow's mites anymore. Yeah, I can't even, I have so many examples going flying through my head that I can't even put words to them all, because that is just a pattern that God has shown me in my life, when I live with that level of surrender, offering what I have, not what I wish I had, not what 10 years from me has, will have, but today, offering like, this is where I am right now, allowing yourself to be there and offering what you have. Yeah, it's multiplied. It's multiplied.

Laurie Graham  20:08 
Yeah, and wherever you're listening from, whether you are you know, on your way to a Christmas eve dinner with relatives, that maybe stress you out, or maybe you're at home alone on a treadmill, maybe you're getting ready to be with friends. Maybe this year is really hard for you. But like in our business world and on our personal world, like, consider, like, where you are right now. Like, what do you have to offer to give? What is the prayer? Can we open up our hands, be openhanded with our businesses? But on Christmas Eve, I just want to say, with your life, maybe it's your family or your relationships or some goals that you have, like, what can we really lay in front of Jesus's feet? What can we just kind of bring, how can we be who we are and show up? I know that this episode, we're talking about, what we're learning about Jesus's influence, like, what can we learn about influence from Jesus? But doesn't it start with that? Like, who we're created to be and what we have?

Becky Brown  21:15 
And I feel like expectation does come back into this. So we were talking earlier about trying to perform for others, unspoken expectations of us, and now I want to say, let's shift those expectations and have great expectations of our Father, who is good and faithful and sent His Son to this earth to show us His humanity and His divinity simultaneously. And, like, what an amazing gift. And you, you will experience, you will see God's faithfulness, yeah. And this next year, in 2026, for your business, like, yeah, bring your Widow's Mite, bring your gold and frankincense and myrrh and whatever your gifts look like, laying them at Jesus's feet and, gosh, hold open those hands with great expectations, waiting and watching to see how He is going to lead you next, how He's going to grow you next, How he's going to bless you next this year. Yeah, it's exciting stuff.

Laurie Graham  22:24 
I love that, you know, and if you're listening and you feel behind, or if you feel like progress is slow and you're having a hard time getting in touch with those great expectations, right? Can I just say we've all been there, and we'll all be there again. And I think it's part of our common humanity. We get to feel like that, and we get to get encouraged by each other. And just like resting in the presence of Jesus, like it just feels, I don't want to say it feels more real right now, but I think because we're talking about it, Becky, like there's just something like, I don't know if people listening are feeling all warm and gooey, but I am like, I am like, it's such a beautiful thing just to stop and consider how Jesus, who literally came to Earth, small and unseen, like, had extraordinary impact. So like, consider that you know wherever you're at today.

Becky Brown  23:25 
Yeah, and for those of you out there, Laurie just mentioned unseen. Jesus coming unseen. I mean, for for those of you out there who feel unseen, who feel like you are working so hard behind the scenes and maybe you're not getting the results yet. Maybe you just feel completely missed. A lot of us as online entrepreneurs feel really lonely, because it's us in our computer screen, right? And so people literally aren't seeing most of the work that you are doing. And so if that's where you are, this is what I want to speak with tenderness. Your value has never been tied to your visibility, and people probably don't see most of what you're doing. Your value has never been tied to your visibility, hidden work. It's still holy work, even if nobody ever knows how much work you put into that product, even if nobody ever knows how much prayer you invested before you did that thing, how hard it was for you to do that thing, your influence. It's not just measured in metrics. It's not just your open rates, your followers, it's so much more.

Laurie Graham  24:48 
Yeah, and if you are living large and your income is through the roof and you just feel like you're on top of the world, can we invite you to come down to the hidden place too? I know, I need that. When things are going well, you don't even need to just come back down to that hidden work, because God is doing stuff under the current and I think sometimes when we are riding high on the wave, we miss the deeper work that He has for us. You know, as we wrap up this episode, you know, let's talk about what we can carry into the next year. And as Becky and I kind of move into this consider for you, you know, like, what do we want to remember from this year? Where do we want to grow? What do we want to carry into the next year, as we think about Jesus being the best model of influence ever?

Becky Brown  25:41 
Yeah, yeah. So we would just invite you to download this week's Action Guide. We mentioned it earlier. It's the Quiet Influence. A five-minute, five minutes. We know it's busy, it's Christmas, but a five-minute reflection for heart-centered entrepreneurs, it's short, it's grounding, and it just helps you reconnect with the kind of impact you actually want to create, the kind that lasts, the kind you want to carry with you and create in 2026. We just want to thank you for spending Christmas Eve with us. Today, we invite you to take a moment of stillness. Take a deep breath with us, and let your work slow down long enough for your heart to catch up. We will see you next time. Thanks for joining us. Go team.