Claiming The Role Model Spot

This is Episode 3 of Season 4, and it begins with a moment I didn’t expect. A single comment from my husband at a celebrity meet-and-greet lit a fuse in my heart: Who gets to inspire our kids first? What started as a simple family outing opened into a deeper reflection on my identity as a newly minted mom to a three‑and‑a‑half‑year‑old, the power of language, and the fierce love that sits inside a parent. I share why that word “inspiration” mattered so much to me, and how I’m learning to live that out as a mom with an only child.
Press play, share this episode with a parent who needs encouragement, and tell us: What words or moments opened a heart‑to‑heart in your family? Subscribe and leave a review to help more families find the show.

Transcript

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Welcome And Valentine’s Catch‑Up;

Speaker 0:03

Hi there, and welcome to the Family of One Child podcast. I'm Foa Comment, a wife, a part-time working mom, and a full-time believer in making the most of every joyful and sometimes busy moments of raising an only child. If you're ready for real stories, plenty of laughter and parenting tips, you're in the right place. So let's dive into this adventure together.

Speaker 1 0:30

Hi, I'm Foa and welcome to the Family of One Child podcast. I just wanted to say a happy Valentine's for last week. If you're celebrating Valentine's, I hope you had a wonderful time celebrating. As for our family, what did we do? As for our family, we had a relaxing time eating. And I think I did some sleeping. And my child did some barn chores. She went to the barn.

Toddler Days To Tween Routines;

Speaker 1 1:03

You know, as a mom now, and she's nine years old, and we celebrated her birthday. That was amazing. It was just realizing how much that she has grown up really quickly. So for those who are in the toddler stage and you haven't slept, and you're wondering when is your child going to go to sleep? When is this teething going to end? How many diapers do I have to change? Is anyone gonna cook dinner, do the laundry, wake me up, comb my hair? Just letting you know it does pass. So I'm at that stage, I think it's called pre-teens. Is it tweens? Someone's gonna let me know. So I'm at that stage where she can brush her teeth, get herself dressed, and she can do the laundry in vacuum. And then today she was putting things away, like reorganizing the the utensils and the drawers in the kitchen. And I was like, that is so nice because I didn't have to tell her. So this today was a lovely day for her to reorganize some of the cupboards and the drawers, and then we'll just see one day at a

Meeting A Celebrity Sparks A Feeling;

Speaker 1 2:21

time. So I wanted to share in this episode about when she was about three and a half years old. We were going to this event, my husband and I and Olivia, and we were going to see this celebrity and this woman, she is well known in the she raced cars. No, not I don't think it's just any cars. There's this particular, I think it's the fastest car or something like that. I'm gonna get it wrong. But she uh I saw her, she's on T well, she's no longer she had passed away many years, but she was many she was amazing. She was on TV shows and she knew a lot about vehicles, and she was the kindest person. Now I was so happy that I got to meet her, and I learned a lot just watching her, how she just came on TV and she was an inspiration, and she's amazing. So, and my husband, he loves, you know, learning, he loves cars, and so I don't know anything. If someone asks me what kind of car you have, I'm gonna say it's gray. Yeah, you're dealing with someone like me, it's blue, it's gray, it has four wheels. That's as far as you're gonna get. Then I'll just throw, well, what model? I'll just make it up and just what year throw out a year that I think it was, you know what I mean? Sounds pretty good. So yeah, that's the kind of detail I I'm I'm kind of like with cards. Anywho, so we go to this event, and you know, we're getting so excited, and there's this long line of people waiting to meet this wonderful celebrity, and she is so nice, I mean absolutely nice, and I'm excited and I'm practicing my hello. Hello, like my name is Ruth, and this is my husband. Well, I'm asking my husband, are you gonna introduce us? And I'm holding Olivia. So we're getting closer and closer,

Claiming The “Inspiration” Role;

Speaker 1 4:27

right? And then when we finally meet her, he introduces us to her, and he goes, This is my wife, and this is my daughter, Olivia, and we just wanna and he goes, and I I just want to say thank you for being a great inspiration to our daughter. And I'm like, inside I smile, I mean I was smiling on outside, right? But inside I was like, What if that didn't sound right? Because I'm like, I I'm her mom, and I should be those words should be reserved for me. He should he should be telling me and only me, I am an inspiration to our daughter. Now, how at that moment, and maybe if if I had said it, thanks for being an inspiration, but because when he said it it didn't sit well in my heart. And I'm smiling like, oh yeah, thank you, you know, because she has this celebrity, she's amazing, she's done wonderful things, and she's super kind, like there's nothing wrong with her. But at that moment I realized when my daughter was three and a half years old, and I don't know if you've gone through this, maybe you have, maybe you're not, but I wanted to be an inspiration to my daughter, and I did not want that title to go to anyone else. I felt like because I had long for a child, and I'm doing the best I can with the resources I have, with the time that's given, and I am learning about her heart, and there are moments I have failed as a mum and probably you know as a friend to her, but I'm learning and growing, and I'm trying to do the best I can. I want for her to say to me or my husband, I am a best role model for her. I'm the one that has been inspiring. And I didn't realize until my husband said it to another woman in front, holding my daughter. Now, my daughter's three and a half, she has no idea what that really means at all. She's not achieving goals at three and a half. No, maybe your child has, but my child's like, nah, just playing around. Hi, Mama Dad's holding me, not sure what's really, you know. She's just saying hello. And all she wants to go is probably eating ice cream. I mean, there are a lot of things, popcorn, there was stuff there. But I realized after

Honest Talk On Parenting Highs And Lows;

Speaker 1 7:24

that event, I came home and I told my husband how I was feeling in my heart, and I was saying, you know, when you said that, it didn't sit well with me because I'm her mom. And even though, you know, it was a nice thing to say, because she has inspired many ladies, she was really awesome to me, like just watching her and learning about this woman, you know, how she achieved her goals, and she's amazing. For some reason, at that moment, I did not want another woman to take that place for Olivia, and so I wanted to share that. Maybe out of the millions of millions of only child families, especially mums with daughters, have you ever gone or felt that with your child? For me, it came on when she was three and a half. Now maybe had he said it to a grandma or a family member, I wondered, but I think still in me, if he had said it me I have a f yeah, maybe if he said it to another family member, I still want to be that for my child. And because of the just of me wanting to have that relationship and be the person that she will go to. I mean, she's only nine years old. So one I know now that because I wanted to have that place, I am still learning to invest in it. Meaning to to try and just continue be the best I can. And I say I try to do the best I can because there are moments where I'm like, goodness gracious me, parenting is challenging, parenting is really annoying when I'm tired and all I want to do is go to sleep. You know, that song, I don't want to go to work, I want to play on my drum all day. Hello, I can just play on my drum all day and go to sleep. Or watch a movie or have some popcorn. I don't know. Because you can ask my daughter, if she was right here, she'll be like, Mom, mm-hmm. She's got a lot of improvements, but then she'll say, I would like to think she'll say, Mom, some days you're good, some days you're grouchy, some days can be better. Who knows? Today she gave me a s I mean, she didn't give me a score out of 10, but she prayed that I could be least grouchy.

unknown 10:31

So there you go.

Speaker 1 10:33

And I thought I was doing good. So, you know, everyone, I mean as my child, she's gonna like tell people this is how mom's really doing.

Listener Shout‑Outs Across The Map;

Speaker 1 10:44

But before I go on any further, I just want to give a shout out to my listeners who have been listening to this podcast, especially when you listen to the last episode. So each time you listen to the last episode, I'm going to give you a shout out. And so that's just my way of saying thank you. Now, if I had missed you, it's because that I wasn't able to get your this where you were from, and I had recorded it, so I had missed it. So I'm just gonna give right now I'm in my buzz sprout, and I now am going to see who listened to the last episode. So these are the locations of the listeners who listened to my last episode, and I just want to give you a shout out. This is from Uppsala County, Melbourne, Victoria, Springfield, Massachusetts, London, England, Revelstoke, British Columbia. I think I said that wrong. Is Revelstoke, British Columbia, Windsor, Connecticut, Windsor, Otario, and Sydney, New South Wales. I just want to say to you thank you all for taking the time to listen to this podcast. And I appreciate just how much you all have supported me and also for taking the time to hello, follow this podcast, this child of one podcast.

Rethinking Role Models Over Time;

Speaker 1 12:35

And so getting back to the story, it's interesting to see, or you know, not interest interesting to see, but it's interesting that my heart felt like that at three and a half. Now, maybe you had already gone through that stage a lot earlier. So maybe like you had your child, your daughter, and you're like looking like, oh, I just want to be that you know, the inspiration for them when and I don't want anyone else to take that spot. Well, me, uh I think when I heard it, it wasn't till then I decided, wasn't till then not that I decided, not like, ooh, uh-uh. That's for me. Or maybe like it doesn't matter because you know she has wonderful role models, but so that's something I'm working on. Now it's gonna be interesting when she's a lot older, as an adult. Will she say that? I don't know. I like to hope that I was an inspiration, and they're probably different areas, like cooking is not gonna be one thing, it's not gonna be my cooking for inspiration, it's gonna go to her grandparents, her grandma, who's a wonderful cook, who knows how to bake and make things. Me, you know, I'm probably I would like to be more of encouraging an inspiration of achieving goals like mom, you know, her, she's very creative, and I inspired her to follow through and take risks, and even then when things fail, I watched her grow and learn and explore with her. I mean, that would be one I like. So who knows, right? I mean, because maybe you've listened to this podcast, you're listening, and you your child is an adult, and you're a lot further ahead, and so you could share this like, oh, I've been through and this is what my child said with me. So it's gonna be interesting as I track many years from now, and I listen to this episode, and I have my daughter on to see in what areas I had inspired her, just an encourager to her life. Because I am like you, you are doing the best you can with the time that's given and the resources

Seasons Change: Work, School, Horses;

Speaker 1 15:16

you have. I mean, for me, I'm working part-time, so even when I was working uh when I was a stay-home mom, a full-time stay-at-home mom, you know, my routine was different. I had a set routine with her, and she was a toddler. So there was sleeping times, there was like activities, and there were like when should you know, just things that I had to make sure we were both not going crazy. And then I had more people to help me, like I had grandparents. But now that I'm working part-time and she's at school, I'll return and then you bring on a horse, so she's got horse lessons, and so the rhythm of what we do changes in the season. So I wanted to encourage you. Maybe you're in the toddler stage and you're wondering when is it going to end? When is the you know, when do they go to sleep? Is it starting? Is it when is uh they're going to finish having like a teething? I mean, or maybe you're okay with a teething and it's not that big of a deal, or maybe you have the child who goes to sleep a lot. She f she didn't she slept a lot until she was a baby, maybe around about two, and then it she didn't sleep as much. But I was like, man, I just want to keep sleeping like she was a baby. I mean, why not? Anyhow, so I just wanna the reason why I wanted to encourage you and share the story because maybe you can relate to it. And I wonder if it's different for or if it's similar with mums and sons. Like that's a different because I don't have a son, so I can't talk about that. But for me and my child putting that spot in there, I mean, having that space where my husband now, when I shared with him, I wanted that space to be an inspiration for her, that means a lot for me. So he now says it, maybe because he realizes how much those words mean to me. And so me being at fifty, I wonder I mean, has he said it to others? I think more than I've said it to fa certain family members that have helped me parent my child. So for example, I have a grand grandma and my in-laws and I have older siblings who help me and guide me because their children are a lot older. And so I tell them they are an inspiration to me

Owning The Words That Matter;

Speaker 1 18:18

and they have guided me with wisdom and patience so I can be the best mom for her. Yeah, so I wonder about that. With this book, the period. I just want to say thank you to the moms who have purchased this book. Now, the reason why I wanted to create this book is because I wanted to provide a tool for you to have just to start the conversation. It's a conversation starter, so it helps you not have that awkward like moment. Like, how am I gonna start to talk about the period? What kind of words to use? This is a very simple read, and it has simple, beautiful instructions, not sorry, not instructions, illustrations, and then it has colorful, very colorful pictures, and it has a little journal, like a two-page journal, very simple in the middle, and then at the back it has like a coloring version of the book. So this is twelve dollars and ninety nine, twelve dollars and ninety-nine on Amazon. So, yes, it is available in other countries, twelve dollars and ninety nine, and it's just to help start, it's a mini series, so there's going to be other books, other subjects about a certain topics. So

A Simple Book To Start Period Talks;

Speaker 1 20:10

if you're looking for like you just want to start it, it's not a clinical book, it doesn't go into really detail about the period, it helps you start that conversation, and you can then take it where you would like to talk to about your child, about the period, about the body. But if you're looking for a solution, like I just want to start it, I just want her and I to start engaging in that conversation. This is a great book, and it's only a two-minute read, it's very simple, very engaging, and so it's just there to support is supporting that conversation you're already like wanting to have with your child. So this is a great resource as well. So get it, and let me know what you think. I wanted to encourage you to say kind things to yourself because you are you are pouring life, you're pouring encouragement to your child, you're pouring encouragement to your husband, and most likely, I bet you're doing it to your community too. You're contributing. So I wanted you to take care and say kind things to yourself as well. You are you are truly amazing. And so if you have resonated with my story too, maybe you have felt maybe there was a moment in time where your husband had said, Oh, he was holding your child, and you said, Thank you for being an inspiration to my child. You're like, What? You're not alone. I felt that too. And if you want to share a story or give me a feedback, please do on my podcasts. You can reach out to me as at Buzz Sprout or on YouTube or wherever you're listening to this podcast. Send me a feedback. Let me know how you felt and how you dealt

Be Kind To Yourself, Share Your Story;

Speaker 1 22:14

with that. For me, I just sat down. I eventually told my husband that evening why I wanted that to be the inspiration for my child first. I wanted that for me as her mom who's learning, who's growing with her, who's exploring, who is loving on her. And I wanted to be that. So and it's okay to be that. So just letting her know. So I just want to say, thank you for listening to the podcast, The Child of One. This is Foa, and I hope you had a great Valentine's Day, because it was last week. I had an amazing Valentine's Day. And when I meant amazing, I asked my husband, thank you for the flowers. This is I say thank you before he got home. Well, actually, I called him and then I emailed him and then I text him. So yeah, he got the hint. But he was really good because I do it every year. Like, thank you. Oh my goodness, I cracked myself up. Okay, so I better let you go. I'll catch you in the next episode. Bye.