Discombobulated with Bobby Jaycox

#14 Razorblades and Beefcakes | Discombobulated with Bobby Jaycox

• Bobby Jaycox • Season 1 • Episode 14

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So, you thought manifesting things was a surefire way to get what you want? Tune into our latest Discombobulated episode, where I debunk that myth and share some hilarious life stories, including my ill-fated sixth-grade romance and my tumultuous relationship with the seasons. Ever wondered about the health effects of Palo Santo? I've got you covered there, too. 

Strap in as we take a trip down memory lane to a Story of the Year reunion show that will have you reminiscing about the glory days of 'Razor Blades' and 'Holding on Forever'. You'll catch the anticipation in my voice as I recall the thrilling build-up of 'And the Hero Will Drown'. I’ll also spill the beans on my love for the band Gel, and how their music sets the mood at their shows, and why I can't help but keep the mic stand on stage during my stand-up performances.

On a more serious note, we'll grapple with the taboo topic of suicide and the dark humor of writing sketches about it. There's also the fun part about my plans for releasing bonus episodes on Patreon and the birth of a new podcast series, the 'I Just Woke Up Podcast'. And finally, the age-old fashion conundrum - hoodie or jean jacket? You'll get a kick out of my thoughts on that, and the peculiar concept of Mr. and Jess. Trust me, you won't want to miss this one!

Speaker 1:

All right record, here we go.

Speaker 2:

Welcome to another episode of Discombobulated. I'm your host, Bobby J Cox.

Speaker 1:

How are you doing with life? How are you doing? Don't grab that knife.

Speaker 2:

How are you doing? Don't cut that cake. How are you doing? You don't even know how to bake.

Speaker 2:

You fucking suck at things you try to do like making cakes and fucking up in school. This is obviously planned and rehearsed every episode. This is what I wrote for the beginning. Just kidding, or, jk, if we're in Too much of a hurry to say just kidding, I'm so glad you're here, let's do it. I got some right here. I fucking got some freaking polisanto. I figured we should. Let's clear the air.

Speaker 2:

Bobby, polisanto is bad. Do you know that? But I have it already. You ever buy something and then find out it's bad, did you? When you had your iPhone, did you know? Can you smell that? Does the smell come through my microphone? Like imagine if I didn't know how to smell? Yeah, I know that getting polisanto is probably not the best thing. I don't think it's good. I think if I'm getting it it's bad. But when you got your iPhone, did you know that slave labor went into that? Did you know that? I didn't. It's a good thing we got this polisanto going to really calm me down. I found out about polisanto because I was dating a witch and you know what?

Speaker 2:

The cool thing about witches and I will say this about you witches, warlocks it's not gender specific when it comes to this, a lot of people who are witches are also manifesting things. They bring things into fruition. But one thing that my ex would do when we would be together Bobby, you probably did bad things Sure, I did. If they want to talk about it, they could start a podcast. Ow, oh man.

Speaker 2:

But the thing about manifesting if you're a person who's like I manifest things, do you ever manifest arguments? You get in Because I was like I guess you can't manifest everything. You can't manifest like let's not argue about something so trivial. Once again, could we maybe live this life that everyone forgets is so fleeting and beautiful and magical? Should we live it nervous as shit or should we have fun? Probably that one. And then you try to have fun and people are like I've got to work in the morning and you're like, ah, you guys ever do that. I haven't gone to one recently, thank the fucking god. But you go to a funeral and everyone's like, ah, it's so sad, we should all get together more, we should talk more. And then it's like after a week it's like pfft, someone better die again because I'm busy once more. It's like some more polisanto till we feel better. Honestly, in that last batch I kind of let it get a little too hot, and so now it's really poly santi in here.

Speaker 1:

Come sail away, come sail away, come sail away with Bobby.

Speaker 2:

Anyone else not know the lyrics to any song they like. I sing every song I know, incorrectly. In case you were wondering, even some of my favorite songs, bobby, do an example. Nope, because I don't want you to ruin my favorite songs and the way that I like them. I will say this when I was in fuck, I guess, like sixth grade I was dating this girl, which meant we had class together and my mom took us to go get ice cream, which I remember.

Speaker 2:

I do remember this one. I remember we went to go get ice cream and we went to the mall and I ate it all because I'm a little fat boy who loves to eat all of his ice cream. And I remember the girl that I was on a date with. She took like two bites and threw it in the trash and my mom will still bring that up to this day. Do you remember that time? That girl took two bites of that ice cream cone from the mall and threw it away. I was about to drop, kick that lady down the escalators. This is my mom's words, not mine. I was about to drop, kick that lady down and that flight. Mom, we're in sixth grade and that sixth grader pissed me off.

Speaker 2:

This is the life we lead, but there's a lot to be grateful for. It's not scorching hot when I go outside. I got to put on a hoodie the other day.

Speaker 1:

Oh.

Speaker 2:

And not when you pretend to put on a hoodie. When you look at the weather and you see that it says 73. And for some reason you're like well, when I sleep sometimes I want to put on a sweater when it's 73. Yeah, it's a different 73 outside, when the sun's out, and you'll put on a hoodie and you try it, you think it's cool, and then you're like I can't breathe.

Speaker 4:

But not now.

Speaker 1:

Not now, Not again Summer Bye.

Speaker 2:

Here's what we're doing though we are breaking up with Summer, we're like losing their number, and then we're going to start dating fall, and fall will be here for a second, and then she's got to go back to finish her master's program, so she can't stick around for too long. So then, uh-oh, who are we dating again? Oh, my god, bobby, tell me you're not, I am. I'm dating Winter again.

Speaker 1:

But every time you hate her, you, oh you guys get together and all you do is complain. You complain that you can't. You know like they're making you call off work. Oh, Bobby, when you're dating Winter dude, you just everything about you sucks, man you got to.

Speaker 2:

It takes you longer to get places. So much extra baggage comes with Winter. Literally the coat you got to carry everywhere Checking the weather Is it freezing? Or like sincerely freezing to where, like I, have to bring extra things? You're like getting ready the night before Like you're going to go like hunting right, isn't that right? Is that not right? Is it not? Is it right? Is it wrong?

Speaker 4:

To say I'm sorry, sorry.

Speaker 2:

So many things I want to get into. Let's fly a little bit more Palo Santo. Hey, let's check this out. Ok, Google Is Palo Santo bad.

Speaker 3:

On the website Quoracom. They say smoke from the burning of Palo Santo wood may have negative impacts on one's physical and emotional well-being. Any kind of smoke inhalation may irritate the respiratory system and result in coughing, wheezing and shortness of breath.

Speaker 2:

I don't know if you heard any of that, but she just said respiratory. I can't even miss say it, like she said it Respiratory. So basically I asked what if Palo Santo is good or bad, but basically they're like any kind of smoke is not good to breathe in. Oh, give it to me, give me the Palo, give me the Pauly's. Yeah, I'm Pauly Santo. I don't need that lighter. I might if I like some more Palo Santo. But yeah, it's fall, it's feeling good.

Speaker 2:

I am very excited to announce coming soon is another thing I've been wanting to do for a long time and it's going to go. I think I'm going to make a channel with Discombobulated and if I don't, then this is a lie. But I want to do more episodes of Discombobulated on the street. I did a man on the Street episode. I did a. I had an idea, since this fail was going to play in Chicago and I wanted to see them. And I was like what if I could almost like add, you know, do some comedy while I was there, do a show? And then I was like, oh, I could also do like this man on the Street to everybody outside before.

Speaker 2:

And then I got really excited. I was like I want to do a man on the Street sooner. So I looked it up and I saw that Guns N' Roses was coming to town and I wrote out this idea. I had all these questions and stuff I was going to ask all these fans while they waited in line for Guns N' Roses to play at Bush Stadium. Bush Stadium is where the Cardinals play. Guns N' Roses is a rock and roll band from the early 90s and in 1991, they caused a riot here and I know nothing about it, but I said it as if I know any facts. I don't know what happened. I think there was probably, if they're called guns and roses, there was probably a little bit more. I'm guessing there wasn't more roses that day.

Speaker 4:

Ouch.

Speaker 2:

So I did a man on the street. I was gonna do one for guns and the roses.

Speaker 2:

But guess what? Guns and roses canceled because of an illness. Do I know what the illness was? I sure don't. It didn't. It was just an illness. They said I can't come for an illness. It sounds like it's like Axl Rose was like whoever had the illness? I think it was Axl Rose. They had the illness, like you do whenever you're not even given a fucking shit, how you call an sick to work. Hi, I can't comment. Oh again. Okay, what is it this time? Someone you know? Are you at the hospital? No, I have an illness. What kind of illness?

Speaker 2:

You're not allowed to ask me those things like that, but if we're being honest, it's the shits. I'm guessing maybe someone had the shits and had to cancel their arena tour.

Speaker 1:

They're shitting down there Shit. And then the knees, knees. Ooh, I got the shits and I can't play. Welcome to the jungle.

Speaker 2:

I shit on my pants every time I don't know how to whistle that part. Wait, what is the lyrics to that song? I can't parody it. If I don't know it, who cares? But so anyways. So I went down and I did a discombobulated on the street and I was actually just asking people. I was like aren't you so mad that they canceled Guns N' Roses and there were so many people just fake? Oh yeah, I'm pissed. And I was like what was your favorite song you've written here? And people were like the one about the roses. No one knew, and so it was cool to get some good interviews with that. So stay tuned for that. That'll be coming out soon. I just have to edit it and it will be out.

Speaker 2:

I did have trouble uploading stuff from my camera to my laptop and the really cool thing is that people are like you know what the internet? You can just ask it anything and it'll give you an answer. It will. But when you try everything that the internet says and nothing happens, what feeling do you have? Because I always have this unsettling feeling where I'm like am I somehow ahead of time? How am I the only person with this question right now? Like you, just you have to ask something and then you don't know how to ask it right and the internet's so big that it's like something doesn't come up. But last night I sang lyrics to a song. What's that song?

Speaker 2:

Oh, boom, shakadi, boom, shakado boom shakadi and that boom shakado, like that song. You know, you ever heard that song? I said that into my phone and it pulled it up. I was like huh. We asked the guy down the cause. He played it at the bar we were at. I went and said hi, my buddy, my buddy Paul. He was in town. So I said hi, while they all drank and I drank none.

Speaker 2:

Bobby, is something wrong. No, I just think I'm at the point where I'm gonna really save the days that I drink. It doesn't seem like it needs to be every day. It seems stupid. There'll be a point where I don't know I feel like cause that you know it's not like I did anything. That was like you know, like a come to God moment of like I gotta stop drinking. I just I was like making pasta one night when I got home and I was just drunk and I was like that, like drunk enough, where you're like, okay, I could probably make a fire right now and then I'm stirring pasta and I could. Just, I was just standing there being drunk and I could just like, just like, felt like I was like underwater, if that makes any sense, and I was just like I'm drunk.

Speaker 4:

I don't like how this feels.

Speaker 2:

So I gave it up for Lent. No, I just I think I'm just over it, but I still like hanging out. So they invited me out to the bar. So I and I did I an Uber and I did buy SIGs at the bar and then an Uber back. I was like almost I was damn near close to spending 40 bucks, and it was in my city. It's like, dude, you just spend so much money, like why add alcohol to that? People are like, well, cause, I have the money to spend.

Speaker 1:

Well, I don't.

Speaker 2:

So yeah, so check out the disc and Bobbiliatino. Oh, and there was also a dog event. So I went to the dog event and I don't want to give too much away, but I'm very excited about that. So Discombobulated has a lot more stuff coming your way. You're so welcome, bobby. You do too much, I sure do. I was handling asbestos the other day. I like knocked into a wall. I was like what is this? And I was like you know, like the person I was working with was like I don't, it's nothing bad. And I was like what?

Speaker 1:

this doesn't look like asbestos and they're like yeah, it might be asbestos.

Speaker 2:

So we halted action. The fuck is asbestos. I like looked it up and it's like a natural occurring thing that kills people. You're telling me, man, I'm gonna have a great night tonight. We're going out. I'm going out with my boy Briggs. We're going out. I'm gonna go see my buddy. Lamair is in town. He is headlining at Helium. Why could he? He's headlining at Helium St Louis. He's there tonight. Mark Maron's there tonight too. They're both headlining in different rooms. I'm gonna go see LaMair Lee, my buddy, who I met in Philly. He's an amazing comic. You should absolutely check him out and somehow hear this and then go back in time to go see LaMair. I'm sure the show is gonna be great. Can't wait to go hang out with him and then come home and get some shut-eye, because I've been getting so much done to think I'm gonna have a garage sale soon.

Speaker 4:

I've been getting through some shit Just looking at stuff being like don't eat, that Don't eat that.

Speaker 2:

Well, this is my backup toaster, in case one day my toaster breaks and if I don't make toast, they'll kill me. Like I have so many things that I've moved from apartment to apartment to apartment that I've never fucking used. Can I please burden this to someone else? Like, basically, what you're gonna do to a garage sale is you're just like it's like the VHS of the ring which you can also sell at a garage sale. You take all your shit and you make it someone else's problem.

Speaker 2:

They're like ooh maybe I need forks with wizards on them. And then you buy it and you get home and your husband's like what is that? It's a wizard spoon. And he's like, oh okay, I guess this is ours now, so I can't wait to have one of those.

Speaker 2:

How much for the shoes they're on my feet? I'm not selling those. Oh, okay, hey, hey, buddy, how much for this? That's actually the garage we're standing in. This is not for sale. He's like shaking it with his hand. I'll give you 250 bucks for it. Okay, it's yours. My roommate's pissed.

Speaker 4:

Bobby, that's not your garage to give away.

Speaker 2:

It sure isn't, it sure is not. Not trying to brag, but I did a hand modeling commercial lately.

Speaker 1:

Oh, what oh these hands?

Speaker 4:

Wow dad.

Speaker 2:

I had to get a manicure. Didn't love that. And then I was on set and they kept saying smile with your hands, which is impossible to do without smiling also with your face. And then the director was very cool. He was like all right, go ahead and just like act. And because we were doing so much of it, I was like trying to make some people on set laugh, which I like to do. It's like we're, you know, we're just like you. Came to see her face with it and I was like, oh, so good to see you. And he's like a little less fake. And I go okay, he's like less than that and like so I overhand acted my nails look directly at the camera.

Speaker 2:

But it is when I'm recording this right now. It's the. It is September 16th. It will be coming out on Monday, but this is September 16th, right now and Oct어를, but it comes October 16th and then I was so very good of my life.

Speaker 2:

Story of the Year 20 years ago today, unless you're listening to this at a different day when I've released it, but if you're listening to this somehow right now and you are in my room and I don't know about it 20 years ago 20 ago today 20 years ago today, my favorite band, story of the Year, released their fucking debut album.

Speaker 2:

Bobby, you ever gonna stop talking about this band? No, and I'm wearing their t-shirt right now. It's my favorite t-shirt. I wear it so much it's starting to get small or I'm gaining weight and it feels like that Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba Ugh Page Avenue, 20 years old. They had their 20 year reunion show and I went to that. I was on the big screen. If you'd have fucking told me the first time I was listening to this fucking band. They're like, you're gonna be at their show and they're gonna have your face on the fucking three big jumbo trons. Fucking, everyone's gonna and everyone's like. That guy's not good at acting. No, I'm so good at acting, I'm really good. Hire me Once the strike's over and commercials don't count. If you're wondering, I am not a scab and I had no scabs on my hands.

Speaker 1:

That's why they picked me.

Speaker 2:

But yeah, story of the Year, fucking ugh this album.

Speaker 1:

Until the day I die.

Speaker 2:

That was a perfect rendition. That is the song that is. Whenever I'm talking to people I'll be like, you know, story of the Year until and I sing it and they're like, well, you didn't hit any notes, but we do love that. Some of my favorites from that record I love me some razor blades. Originally it was called Razor Blades and Cupcakes and it was actually on this album called wait. I don't know what the album was called, but the band was called Big Blue Monkey and the song sounded a little different. And, oh man, every once in a while I'll put it on, because it's on YouTube. I'll put on Razor Blades and Cupcakes.

Speaker 1:

No stop signs. Hold me back.

Speaker 2:

I would kill to be able to sing a little bit and find out what this is worth to you Holding on forever.

Speaker 2:

No, oh man, there are so many songs I wanna sing, but I'd prefer if you guys listened, so if I sang, you would not want to listen anymore. I could play guitar, though I do not play that song on guitar Razor Blades, which it's now called and it's on their debut album, but you gotta go check out. I would recommend going on YouTube, because someone finally put it on there. I think it's illegally, but I also don't know if the story of the year minds. I wish I could find my live.

Speaker 2:

I call it the live at the assassins, but it's actually called Live in the Lou the assassins and you should watch that because they play all the songs from that album and they go a little hard and they actually play a song that they did not release called the Heart of Polka is still beating, and goddamn if they're not referencing John Candy and ripping that song to pieces. But you gotta watch the live one because Adam Russell, their bass player, jumps from the second story and crowdsurfs killed 19 people. Ha ha, ha, ha ha. But he did jump and whenever they have to like cut it, which is weird they had to like I've asked him about this, but they basically like Adam's up there and then they're like from this house of our friendship, cut the door and like the match.

Speaker 1:

so behind you, da da, da da da, you buy it.

Speaker 2:

And then Adam jumps and they have to cut and they're like it's like the eagle has land, so they, the Falcon is land, but so basically he jumps and lands, but they had to cut between that. They couldn't show that, which means that someone who makes rules I can't write my head around this someone who makes rules was like no, you can't put that in the DVD. Okay, so what do we do? Do we scrap the D? What do we do? We cut out that whole, like what do we do? And they're like if you boys, if you guys, just cut out all they need you to do, if you just cut out from when he lets go to him landing, I think we should be square. What is that accomplished? Well, you're not gonna see him jumping, oh, okay. And you think that people are such idiots that they're gonna be watching me like how the fuck did he get down there so fast? The song didn't stop. Is Adam Russell the fattest mother fucker I've ever seen? Is Adam Russell the fattest mother fucker I've ever seen? Is Adam Russell the fattest mother fucker I've ever seen? Which is so funny because he's never been fat that I've seen Been watching this guy for years. On the on the internet they describe him as the stick with arms. But is he the fastest man ever? Did he run downstairs from the pageant? I don't know who made the rules or whatever, but you should watch that.

Speaker 2:

Some of my other favorite songs, obviously until the day I die. Obviously it's the Banger I. When you watch the Banger, I mean and the love I have for that song. When I learned how to play it, I started playing it on guitar. It like it's just like. It's like re rediscovering the song. And so it's like that song fucking rules.

Speaker 2:

And then one song that like when I would listen to their albums when I was growing up I I was like I'm not gonna listen to that song Growing up I the first song is a what if I literally couldn't think. And you're like, do you even like this fucking band? But I almost said I was like you ever like I'll give myself pressure that doesn't need to be there. Then I'm like, but no, the song is called In the Hero Will Drown and I would listen to that song sometimes like there's certain songs that hit harder, like just later.

Speaker 2:

And that song I got into more and I learned how to play on guitar. And then I also found this like a deep love for it because of how many times it gets real fucking thick. Ugh. And the beginning is so sick. When you watch Live in the Lou, just cause, like you can hear, it's like I love that like squeal of guitars in the beginning, when it's just like feedback Wow, wow, wow and everyone's getting ready to go, it's like that anticipation is building, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle.

Speaker 4:

Tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle, tickle tickle.

Speaker 1:

Uh, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la the night will go, bobby, you were out of time on most of those songs, yeah give me a break. I'm also doing a fucking podcast. Ugh yeah, not a big deal.

Speaker 2:

I'll play it for you guys right now and like I am recording videos, so if you're watching this on video, the song it's like the beginning goes you gotta slide over, you gotta switch your fingers, and then you take a break and you're like, wow, I can't believe I played that. And then you go open close Two.

Speaker 1:

three open. Draw close two. Two hammered three hip dog Dino da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da, da, da, da da da, da, da da da, da, da, da, da, da da.

Speaker 2:

And then there's other parts of the song you gotta play like a power core beat, Skip one kind of mute it. And then the really cool part is, whenever you get to, you gotta hit the yeah, with your foot you gotta hit a pedal. I don't know how to fuck to do that. I can't use my feet and my hands at the same time play the drums like that.

Speaker 4:

But then the cool part is you get to be like do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do do do do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do do.

Speaker 2:

Fast food fireworks doesn't get to have a 20 year reunion.

Speaker 1:

You know the word, sing it.

Speaker 2:

You know the word sing it, come on St.

Speaker 1:

Louis, you know the setup to this next one. I wrote this next joke, joke, joke when I was. I had a really rough time in my life, life, life, life and this one's all for all of you. So I'll stay in a witch. Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo, woo. Hey, make a fucking circle pit for this tag. That'd be so cool if I got to do that.

Speaker 2:

He called me a and I put the microphone in their face and they're like lady firefighter and I'm like it feels so good to hear your jokes get yelled back at you.

Speaker 1:

I'll never get it, Never gonna get it, never gonna get it, Never gonna get it, never gonna get it.

Speaker 2:

Um so yeah, in the Hero of the Drown. But you know, what's cool Is that they're having the 20 year reunion. They're touring there. It got shows coming up in October. Am I going to every one of them?

Speaker 1:

I freaking wish One of these days I will.

Speaker 2:

But it's only. It's only two more sleeps. And then I remember when your parents would like talk to you like that they're like, hey, in two barnies or two sleeps. That's when you're going to grandma's house. No, we gave your cat away two sleeps ago. It hasn't been that long, you don't need to cry.

Speaker 1:

Miss Bobcat.

Speaker 2:

It's okay, just pretend he didn't exist. Pretend like the CIA took him away and we're not allowed to ask fucking questions.

Speaker 1:

It was cute, all his name was Bobcat though, wasn't it?

Speaker 2:

It is cause your name is also Bob. But two more years. Two more years, and then they're gonna be touring with the 20th anniversary of In the Wake of Determination, and then there's gonna be some after that.

Speaker 1:

I don't remember when the Black Swan no, I do hold on, let me think it had to have came out, cause I was dating a girl who fucking sucked.

Speaker 2:

This actually assaulted me that's actually my best friend. But she did buy me the Black Swan album. So is every, is everyone perfect? No Sub-Sales sponsored by betterhelpcom. You better help me, or so fucking help me God.

Speaker 1:

I'm the best.

Speaker 2:

But yeah, what with the fuck is that? I'm up In the Wake, we'll be out. Oh, but I'm not done talking about the 20th, because I was just listening to the album. Today my roommate came home and she's like Jesus Christ. Do you listen to other music, like I sure do, but I also like, at the end of Falling Down, their last song on Page Avenue? They have I don't know what it's called, but they have like a thing where it's like it goes silent and that's like baaah.

Speaker 1:

What'd you know about the Leafy Bugs? What'd you know about the Leafy Bugs sensory?

Speaker 2:

And they're all like laughing. It's just like them playing with like voice modulator, all that shit and stuff. He take it off my normal voice. I'm like man, I'll feed you, I'll castrate you and feed your balls to my dog and it's just oh, chill the day I die. Bobby, we get it. You like them a lot but I love that. But yeah, two years and then, in the wake of determination which they got a little heavier during that time, if you're not familiar with them story of the year they came out with a platinum album and then they said guess what? We're gonna show you how fucking hard we are With songs like we don't care anymore. And that's all I know, just kidding.

Speaker 4:

Five against the world.

Speaker 2:

And then every story of the year fan, every deep, deep fan loves. Is this my fate? He asked them Because that song is about it's okay, be gay and also Spin your hair like this and go so fucking hard during this song. Oh, that song so good.

Speaker 1:

And then it also has so take me back, take me back there. I forgot my keys and Mikey forgot his keys too. I forgot my keys and Mikey's Mikey's Mikey forgot his keys.

Speaker 2:

But, oh man, that album ripped so hard. Bobby, what's your favorite story of the year album? You know, I don't know, because I don't think I do that like, even though like Store of the year is my favorite band, I don't do that Crazy often. Like, I do it like I have like, like I'm like when people are like what's your favorite movie? Like I'll be like you know, it's like I I've seen the dark night so many times but I don't watch as much anymore but also like Then I'll be like, oh, I still like Batman, so I'll go to another one of the Batman movies. Do you know what I mean? That's how it is with like story of the year albums.

Speaker 2:

We're like, whenever the 20th anniversary was coming, I was getting really into what, listening to page Avenue again and Then, before that, when they released their most recent album tear me to pieces, I listened to the shit Out of that still do. I guarantee you, whenever my like Spotify, like numbers come out this year, whatever I think can't, can't save you has to be the song I listen to the most and I'm in the war music video and I and I love that song. The first time I heard it I was like, get the fuck out of here, but can't save you hits. There's something. It hits. And then I also imagine me playing on stage with them during that song and landing About I don't know seven back flips. Hey, bobby, you're like 14 episodes into your podcast and I think we've done the numbers. You've talked mostly about story of the year. Yeah, check my Instagram. I also post clips of me doing, of Me being funny, and then a lot more of story of the year. We all have our things we're into.

Speaker 2:

Okay, there's a lot of beef. I Didn't even know where to go. I was just gonna say something else, um, but I will say this um, I, before I forget, and then we will wrap up this episode. I will be opening for Zack no e towers. When this comes out, it'll be the week upcoming weekend, so it'll be September 22nd. At September and September 23rd, I'll be opening for Zach. No, we towers Love him. You can check him out. He is on an earlier episode of discombobulated. Just, you can type in his name and it'll come up. I don't remember which one it was, was it? It's? Can't remember, but it was an amazing episode. We had so much fun. We got to talk about relationships. We got to talk about Knowing each other, motorcycles, so it's a great episode. It's for you to learn a lot about Zach and he's a great guy. But also come out and see him, and, yeah, I will be there opening for him. So come see us at helium st Louis next weekend and Then I'm also going there tonight with their last weekend to see Pete Holmes going there tonight. Man, I've been having so much fun. Comedy is just Straight kicking ass.

Speaker 2:

I love being on shows. I love going to see in shows. I have shows coming up. I'm doing a show at perennial October 13th. What are some other dates that I have just booked that I should be looking at that? I am not, but I do know that they are up and coming. Oh, I have a show Akron Ohio September 28th. I'll be doing don't tell Headlining that in Akron Ohio. So come out and see that show, yeah.

Speaker 2:

And what else have I been listening to with? Since we're talking about music, I will say a band that I really been wanting to like talk to everybody about, because I listen to a song by them called dice. They're the band's called gel and I loved this song and then one day I was like you know, I want to like expand and like listen to more of their songs and I like, I Like all kinds of music with thrash metal. I've never really found like a specific band that I like Completely resonated with. And then I was watching dude Jell is just this shit dude, and this is how I describe them. And if I was in a band, if I was in thrash metal band, I would also want to have this vibe. But they play music that the Ninja Turtles would like skate to and they're just so good that I would God that would be so fun to be in like one of those bands. Just like all the guitar players and everything you can just tell they're really vibing out their instruments.

Speaker 2:

It's not. The thing I like about it, too, is that it's not about like, like the pageantry, like it's about the show, like everyone exists there for the show, the audience exists there for the show, the band exists there for the show. Those are the shows that I enjoy going to. That's kind of the stand-up I like to I don't know present, and so if that's how you feel when you come to see me, then I guess we rock and roll together. I also did this whole episode with them, mike and the mic stand, and goddamn Do I feel so relaxed.

Speaker 2:

I've also been doing stand-up with the mic and the mic stand forever. I always pulled it out because when you start stand-up, they give you a lot of rules that are very helpful, but they also, like they do they will. I will tell you, if you're gonna start stand-up, you should listen to the rules. Don't be a know-it-all, because there are things you have to learn and it's not like music. You can't just learn in your bedroom. You have to learn by going on stage and like talking to people and like learning the craft of it. But when you start they'll be like and guys, grab the mic and get the mic.

Speaker 2:

Get the mic stand out of the way it looks so Stupid and I've never thought that I've been to so many concerts and they take it out and like sometimes they move it to the side and obviously, but if they keep it there, I'm not like.

Speaker 1:

Where the fuck did they go you?

Speaker 2:

know, but that was when I started. I remember they were like and you grab it. And so, like I Don't remember when I got this mic stand because I'd started doing shows in my hometown in a restaurant called Jillies and I Remember like I would get on stage and I'd like grab the microphone and I would like, I mean, I would like think about it, you would like practice it like you were in the military, like assembling a gun, and I would just grab it, pull it out and like you take the microphone off to the side and then you're like how you guys doing tonight, like it was always the same. And then recently and I think it was kind of a I Guess it was around the time I was gonna record my album, I don't remember there was just like a set I had where I kind of just kept the mic in the stand and I just really liked how it felt.

Speaker 2:

And there's something about like the change in like anything that like it just changes, like what you do. And like to use bands like sometimes they'll put the mic in the stand, you know, sing like just there. Sometimes they're jumping around and I think with stand-up you can get caught up and doing like kind of the same thing too much and I've just been having so much fucking fun just really playing around. I found a bunch of new bits. Man, I hit myself in the chin. I did find a bunch of new bits while I was in New York.

Speaker 2:

I was just looking, it was just like some of them are just like on the street is like, hey, I found a joke. No one's, is this anyone's joke? I'll take it. Uh, no, I was uh Like writing some new stuff and it's all really silly, like I'm having so much fun doing silly stuff and because I'm not like I don't know.

Speaker 2:

I mean we go through these cycles much like earth, where sometimes I want to make points and then you'll get done with that. Me and my buddy Paul, we're talking about this. But sometimes you'll be like I want to make a lot of points and then you get back to just want to be silly and then you know, then you want to tell a story or whatever. But the growth is the most fun and I'm excited for the headlining shows that I have coming up. I also have merch on my website and With the all the merch right now is for the podcast. Everything is for discombobulated. I love it. I almost want to make it just like a clothing line. I just love it. So let me know what you think of the shirts, the mugs oh, the shirt. I've not released the second shirt yet. I'm very excited to eventually release that.

Speaker 2:

I collabed With a friend of mine and basically we I they just helped me with things that I didn't know how to do on the computer, and they did it so fast. It would have taken me 17 years. But I will be learning, because that's what life is about. It's about living and learning and Saying goodbye. This time, the same old story. Oh, I got to talk about that. Hawthorne Heights was just here too. It's all. We're all bands. We're all talking about the bands, but Hawthorne Heights was here with base side which, if you haven't heard that story, I will.

Speaker 2:

I'm sure I'll tell it many, many times, so we won't talk about it now. But I basically I yelled bass side while motion city soundtrack was on stage because I thought I don't know what the fuck I was thinking. But I just yelled it and I fuck, I'm so sorry and Everyone makes fun of me to this day, which I don't mind, but I, I I do think everyone believes me, but I think at first there might have been a couple people that like, because they were like so what were you thinking? And I was like I wasn't, because I think they were like, were you trying to be funny? And I'm like that is not me, like I'll try to be funny and be a silly guy, but not at like other people's expense. Like ha, wrong person, wrong band. But they were here and I really wanted to go see them, but I really I didn't have any extra money and I had to get stuff done and I'm like, working so hard to Figure out some of this new like software and stuff that I want to do to, who gives a fuck, don't talk about that.

Speaker 2:

So, again, this episode Is pretty much dedicated, I guess, again to story of the year. I should really find other things to talk about, but some podcasts are all about football. You know, I'm not sure if I'm gonna be able to get to the end of the story of the year. No-transcript, at least, I don't do that. I know as soon as I, I know as soon as I end the podcast.

Speaker 4:

I'm like that was the other thing I wanted to talk about. You fucking idiot.

Speaker 2:

Positive note not only drinking less. Whenever you drink less I think I was talking to, I think, ryan Stout, we were talking about this it messes with your planning ability. So, like, the less you drink, the more you're able to plan. And I have been cleaning up and you know something go ahead and clean and get like a 60% on it. Don't finish stuff like, just move stuff around. Don't, when you see a pile of stuff you haven't touched it in six months, shove it with the other pile of stuff you haven't looked in six months and then now you have it all in one pile. Now it feels better.

Speaker 2:

I'm looking at all these shelves. They're not shelves, they're like things on a wall that are shelf-like. I put those up today and I just feel so much lighter. It made me want to record the podcast and I didn't have to, like, kick shoes out of the way. So you know, sometimes self-help comes in tiny forms and that's what I've been doing, because I get really stressed around this time of year because you know, you know the winter's coming and you got like all this work to prepare for and then I got shows coming up. So I'm like you know, you booking travel and doing all that stuff. It gets like so, so tedious and I still haven't decided if I'm gonna buy a car or just keep not having a car, because fuck, I love not driving.

Speaker 4:

I mean it, I love not getting in a car.

Speaker 2:

I like getting in a car in the passenger I love, just like watching the trees, I don't miss fucking parallel parking. Getting in my car and just like sitting there, like it just doesn't. I think I'm just over cars. I wanna live in New York. I wanna be driven around like Miss Daisy yeah, even though I've never seen that movie and I quote it all the time the movie, no, just that one thing that I guess my dad would say all the time. And sometimes I say like honey, like, sometimes I'll say I fuck it, I'm that asshole and I don't. I swear to God, I'm trying to stop, don't scream at me. But every once in a while I'll be like thanks, hon, oh, my God. And now, just so you know, I try to kill myself.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I was thinking about this. Wouldn't this be a funny sketch I wanna make? I think this would be funny, and if it's not, well then it just lives here. But you know, like I keep seeing those videos where it's like basically usually it's a couple, that's a man and a woman, and the man has the remote control and that goes to like apparently his girlfriend's pussy, and then somehow he'll videotape her out and be like you don't mind if I videotape this and put it online, do you? And so he'll film her, like and they'll be sitting at dinner with, like, their parents and he, like, hits the button and films her and then like, somehow it doesn't draw attention to everyone at the table, cause all of a sudden she's like wow, and she's like Zach, stop.

Speaker 2:

I thought a funny sketch would be like two buddies out and all of a sudden it's like it's like a wrist watch that you put on your buddy and then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, he's like a gun that's in his hand and he's like no, stop. It's like goes towards his head. He's like stop, I can't believe. You almost made me climax and kill myself and pull. Yeah, it's not funny, but and I found this out recently all over the country People are weird.

Speaker 2:

Talking about suicide, jokes or anything, people really don't like it. You can talk about fucking, you can talk about cancer and make fun of it, but if you bring up suicide, everyone gets quiet and then you're like it's the only thing that when it happens, like if someone gets cancer with like well, they're still here, we can talk to them about it and be like oh my God, I can't believe you have cancer, but someone kills himself, and they're like whoa Yikes. So sometimes I write sketches about it, cause I think it's funny. Well, that should be deleted. Uh, no, ah, you gave Ed Rooney a phony phone call to Ed Rooney.

Speaker 1:

The guy could cut my lungs out and poop on him.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I'm recording with the other phones, so this one can just go off as it does.

Speaker 4:

I should have put that on airplane mode, which I did.

Speaker 2:

Put this on airplane mode. Okay, who cares? I'm getting a little too inside baseball today, but I know you had fun because you're still listening. Good for you. Good for you for being you and loving me while being you.

Speaker 2:

And being me and being us. Okay, I gotta turn this BP off, okay, yeah. So make sure you stay tuned. Sign up for the Patreon. That is where I'm gonna release the discombobulated on the street episodes and I'm excited to do more of those. And there, and only there, can you give me suggestions for the show until I decide to change my mind. But I have a lot of cool stuff coming up. We've. I think I'm gonna start doing a regular thing of maybe on the bonus episodes, but I'm gonna be doing a regular thing of maybe. I just woke up podcast podcast, which was so fun to set up and to wake up in a studio felt really fucking weird that it was my bedroom that I turned into it. You know how things work. I feel great. I feel loved, you know. No, I really do. I really love this fall weather. I'm gonna wear a fucking hoodie tonight. I'm gonna go out, wear a hoodie that I've been wearing all week. It's so comfy.

Speaker 4:

I'm gonna go out and people be like man. That hoodie looks cool. I think yaps from a wake happy. It's a company that my buddy has. He started it and it's great and I bought stuff from it. I have two hoodies from this company. This is the ASMR episode.

Speaker 2:

I should definitely start one of the episodes right now. If you turned it off, I understand, but if you didn't, I understand that you want to learn more about a wake happy. It's my buddy's company and you can look it up.

Speaker 4:

His name's, devin, and he was really funny in high school. We were both really funny and we did Mr and Jess together. What's Mr and Jess? It means Mr Northwest High School. You win it.

Speaker 4:

It's a pattern for boys. It's a little outdated. I'm not proud of everything we did at that show, but we had a lot of fun and I actually think it's online somewhere, but don't look it up. But he owns this company called the Wake Happy and that's the only I'm going to wear tonight because it's all got that fucking comfortable. It's just so fucking comfortable I can't even get over it. But also, I just saw my jean jacket and maybe I'll wear my jean jacket instead. He has just really never done it with Bobby. Do you? Bobby will trick ya, make you think he's kind of wear a hoodie, and then doesn't wear a hoodie. Where's that jacket? He thought he was kind of wear a hoodie. Then he did it. I packed up. I'm going to move to another place because I want to. I'll be honest, this is the truest form of improv, because I don't know where to take the story, so I won't. Does that make sense?

Speaker 2:

That's what I thought. Two practical不能 world hand, friendship, love, living худelf.