Discombobulated with Bobby Jaycox
“Discombobulated with Bobby Jaycox" is a hilarious and insightful podcast that takes you on a wild ride through the mind of comedian Bobby Jaycox. With his unique perspective as a comedian with ADHD, Bobby shares his unfiltered thoughts, stories, and experiences in a way that will leave you laughing out loud and nodding in agreement. Join Bobby and his guests as they navigate the chaos of everyday life, discussing everything from relationships and pop culture to mental health and personal growth. Get ready for a rollercoaster of laughter, relatability, and a whole lot of discombobulation. Tune in now to experience the world through the eyes of a comedian with ADHD.
Discombobulated with Bobby Jaycox
#61 Chips on a Bus | Discombobulated with Bobby Jaycox
Ever wondered why anyone would willingly choose the dreaded middle seat on a plane? Let's unravel that mystery together while taking a comedic stroll through the eerie halls of my undecorated apartment. From tackling the messy roommate saga to my hilarious morning routine and the undeniable lure of checking my phone before brushing my teeth, this episode is packed with laughs and Halloween spirit. Plus, I'm thrilled to reveal my exciting upcoming clean comedy stint on "Nateland Presents," a fun viewing for the entire family.
Brace yourself as I hilariously navigate the stormy seas of quitting vaping, battling the tantalizing pull of flavored clouds and the chaos of vaporizer cleaning disasters. You'll hear about my fictional vape shop dreams, the comical yet frustrating cycle of resisting—and sometimes giving in—to nicotine's siren song. Amidst the laughter, there's a touch of real-life reflection, as I ponder missed moments with friends and uproarious packing adventures. Witty commentary and parody lyrics spice up this relatable journey.
Get ready for a whirlwind tour as I bounce from South Carolina to Philly, reveling in the joy and camaraderie of the stand-up comedy circuit. Picture Jim Carrey's Zen-like calm during a Hawaiian missile scare and imagine our connection to such iconic figures. We'll cap off this rollercoaster with a mischievous trip down Batman movie memory lane, and a light-hearted exploration of everyday mishaps and climate musings. Join us for a fun-filled reflection on life, laughter, and the moments that make it all worthwhile.
welcome back to another episode of discombobulated. How are you all fucking doing? I am doing pretty good myself. Thank you for asking. Now it's spooky time. It's halloween. We know how to get ready. Someone asked me the other day if I put decorations up. I'm like have you fucking never met me? Are you serious? Do I look like I put up spooky decorations? No, no, no. The spookiest decorations I have is my roommate leaves beers everywhere. Ew, gross Open beers. Socks on the kitchen table, no way. Ah, where do you sleep? I don't have a bed. Is there any artwork on the wall? No, it's just two guys living here. What's the most decorated thing? The podcast. It doesn't seem as sad when you watch it. Happy Halloween. Side note, I did the voiceover work for that. When you hear the pumpkin go, I was. That was me. What's up? It's not every day I start with a song. It is, it is, it is, it is. Every single day I do usually wake up with a song. I usually stretch.
Speaker 2:I'm like you big tired bitch.
Speaker 1:This song's called Stand Up and Piss. And then pretend you're gonna get up. You look at your phone. You look at outside. Outside looks better Fuck. But I cannot but look at my phone. You look at outside outside looks better fuck.
Speaker 2:But I cannot but look at my phone and then back outside. Oh no, my phone's coming back in my face.
Speaker 1:Oh no, did something to my dopamine. Wake up stuff. Oh, now grab the covers, go back to bed wake up in a panic.
Speaker 1:fuck, I gotta do that today Less of a song and more of a hit. But oh, everybody, that's no way to talk the world. That's no way to talk the world. I am, uh, very excited to announce that on october 28th, uh, my, uh, my episode of nate lynn presents comes out, and I'm very excited about that. It's 10 minutes of clean material. You can watch it with the whole family. You could watch it with the whole family. You could watch it with your entire family. You can sit down with your family and watch it and be like ha, ha, ha ha.
Speaker 2:oh, happy Halloween, Ha ha ha ha ha.
Speaker 1:That guy's funny. So yeah, check that out. Uh, nateland presents. It will be on their YouTube channel. I'll be. I'll be sharing it. I'll be YouTube channel, I'll be sharing it, I'll be sharing it and they'll be sharing it. That's what we do. That's what's so good about 2024 is that we all share Everyone's sharing. Sharing is caring and you know like, maybe you know sometimes you're going to take a flight home after you've been on tour and you and the headliner are like, oh shit, damn it, there's no seats that are like together and it's like, and it feels so weird when you're flying.
Speaker 1:And it feels so weird when you're flying if you're hanging out with someone, if you're like I'm here. And then there's another person which side note who the fucking fuck buys middle seats, who looks at three open seats and goes I want the middle one. Give me the middle guy, I would like to sit there. That has to be their plan to be like they sit there and I would like to sit there. That's like. That has to be their plan to be like they sit there.
Speaker 1:And then some people like us come up and then I, tatum got on first and she was like hey, can, uh, we're like traveling together and we're buds. Can we like sit next to each other? And I didn't see it cause I was boarding group four and I think five and she was like I don't know and she was just because I sat down and I was like did it work out? And she was like not well, and but she had the window seat. It's like you can pick what. You now can pick whatever seat you want, except it's so weird to want the middle seat. It's like you can pick what you. You now can pick whatever seat you want. It's so weird to want the middle seat. Do you have any idea how weird it is? If you're a person that's like I like the middle seat, like you have like the weirdest fetishes, you're like I hope people next to me fall asleep and use my shoulders as headrests.
Speaker 2:We don't know each other, but now we know each other. I'm absorbing your dreams in my shoulders.
Speaker 1:Now I'm scared of snakes and spiders. I'm the weirdest superhero there's ever lived. That was who we sat next to on the plane, um, but, uh, I don't even know where that came from or why I was complaining. Um, but it is because I don't I where that came from or why I was complaining. But it is weird because I won't complain about traveling, because I have slept in my car, someone else's car, someone else's. Just, you know, you sleep places.
Speaker 1:I was going to say something gross and I'm not going to say that anymore. I slept in the. It's like what are you talking about, bob? Sometimes like rule of, sometimes, rule of threes is the dumbest thing ever. Sometimes, if you're trying to keep a thing going, just to say, and then you're like, damn, but that's this podcast and you're welcome, but that's this podcast and you're welcome.
Speaker 1:Um, but I felt bad because, dude, we, I don't like to complain about traveling, because whenever tatum had to, she headed to houston and I was heading back to austin, so we had a connecting flight and then in chicago, it's reported ways and that flight was the last mode of transportation I will have. That is um, like that. You know, you ever, just, you ever just realize how grateful you need to be. You ever realize how grateful you need to be Because, like, sometimes we'll complain. We're like, oh, we don't get to sit on the plane, that we don't get to pick our seat. And then you come home and you realize how poor of a guy you are and you're like, well, I don't get to pick our seat. And then you come home and you realize how poor of a guy you are and you're like, well, I don't want to take an Uber for eight minutes to my apartment. So what I'm going to do, what I think is good, is I'm going to take the bus. And what's bad about the bus? Nothing.
Speaker 1:But sometimes, when you sit down, a guy across from you will sit down, take off one of his shoes, one, just one of his shoes, takes off one of his shoes, bare foot knit, on a bus and was eating spinach dip with chips, and I think he had a shirt that said like Texas or bust. And I guess kind of, hey, maybe Texas and bust. But he had one of his shoes off and he looked at me and gave me one of those. He was like chewing it. He gave me a nod. I like all right, hey, can I have one of those chips, but that's.
Speaker 1:That's whenever I realized I was like, oh man, I've been like, if you're flying and you complain about flying, oh you, you should have to take like a greyhound bus or a city bus, or, you know, you travel with a guy who has a bus. That's what you should do, because then you realize how nice it is to be like, oh, our flight's delayed. What do we have? It is overpriced, but at least we have food, you have beverages available, but when you're on there's a city bus coming, you better, you better know everything about that bus, and if someone has a question, if you don't know the answer, they are not going to be happy. What time does the bus get here? I don't know, I'm not from here.
Speaker 2:Get fucked.
Speaker 1:Yes, sir, Um, yeah, yeah. And then Tatum texted me and she was like hey, here's a screenshot of the guy who's my driver. He's giving me weird vibes. He's giving me weird vibes. Here's his in case I go missing. Here's his like information. It's like okay, cool, lift already had that and I sent her a photo of this guy's bare feet with these dude, these bare claws of toes, these nasty dude. They were just not good toes. You know what. They were good toes. You know they were built like these toes. The toes on this man were built kind of like those cyber trucks. You see, they really had like a lot of like sharp angles to them. You definitely look like.
Speaker 1:If you, I'm like I wouldn't know how to, I wouldn't know how to open up this thing or how to clean it. Is it? Is it self-driving? I will say this about that guy If you ever enjoy, if you're ever sitting on a bus and you can take off one of your shoes, set it down and enjoy chips and spinach dip, you're doing all right. If you can be on a city bus, lean back and just be like, oh my God, Like. If that, then you know what? Hey, fucking power to you, Because people can complain about everything you know. And this guy is just like.
Speaker 2:I got two pickles. I got two pickles. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Like it's the simple things in life. It's chips on a bus. It's chips on a bus. Let's take a moment to pray, pray. Dear Lord, please give us the strength to not hit this vape that for about I don't know years I've been saying I'm going to quit. Lord, please give me the strength that whenever I want to hit it and then say to myself out loud don't hit it, it's not going to make you feel better, and then still hit it and then go. Well, I guess I should hit it 19 more times. Dear Lord, please give me the strength, but I could hit it.
Speaker 2:I could hit it right now and no one would be able to stop me. Oh my fucking God, the top of that is disgusting. Oh my God, what is in there? What in the fuck is in the top of my?
Speaker 1:vaporizer. That's why I got to quit. That's probably what the inside of my lungs look like. No, it's got to be worse.
Speaker 2:So yeah, so I want to quit this. Please, lord, help me quit it. But I could just hit it right now.
Speaker 1:No, no, I disown thee. I say no baby.
Speaker 2:But I could, and it would be the same as yesterday, looping forever. No, I didn't come this far, to only come this far. But I could laterally stop on this park bench of nicotine. Never again, never again will you give me like that. But we could become friends once more, once more into the good night, once more.
Speaker 1:No, and I mean it this time. I fucking mean it. You think you're so strong, the vape devil, you think you think you're. You think you think I like the taste of red I do, but you think I want it every day, I do. You think I like it to taste like I'm vaporizing a slushie I do, but you think I want it every day, I do. You think I like it to taste like I'm vaporizing a slushie? I don't know. I'm done with you and you get the fucking hell and shit out of here. Sorry about that, guys.
Speaker 1:That was actually a little crazy oh no oh, I accidentally kind of hit it with the back of my throat. Fuck, today doesn't count, I guess I could hit it really quick. All right, fucking. That better be a clip where I'm literally gonna I just almost fucking down. I just fucking glugged down a raz. I glugged down a vape. Hey, buddy, you ever gotten glugged? Hey, buddy, you ever glugged? I used to get glugged a lot in the 90s. Oh, they would glug me. Oh, to get glugged a lot in the 90s. Oh, they would glug me. Oh, to get glugged. Back in the day was just the peas knees. Oh God, me and my friends driving around getting glugged. They would say, hey, do you have a gun? And I'd say, yeah, yeah, check my glug box. And we would laugh while getting glugged. Um, jd vance was supposed to be on the podcast today, so that's great. I guess it's just a solo episode.
Speaker 1:Every single guest that I try to email I can't find their email, but I don't look for very long. I am trying to vote on the road and I'll tell you what. It is not an easy answer. Hey guys, mail-in voting is as easy as looking it up and getting 19 answers. Hey, did you recently move? And you're trying to figure it out. But everything you look up is just I'll figure it out. Hey, click a link in the bio to vote for the president. No, don't do it. Okay, for real, I kind of already hit it, so it so whenever I put it in the back of my throat to do that bit. You know, that thing that's in the back of your throat, it went and it hit it it went which made it suck.
Speaker 1:I got to clean it, though Hold on, what am I going to clean it with? This is why, if you're a kid watching this, that's weird, because I put on the discretion where it's definitely not made for kids. But if you're young and you're trying to, you think vaping looks cool. You think it looks. You think it looks cool. It doesn't look cool. You know what looks cool? A diploma, yeah, a diploma, yeah, a diploma. All right, hold on, hold on, I gotta set this down while I clean out my fucking vape. Um, this episode is sponsored by the vape shop I will eventually own and run when comedy doesn't work out. It's called Bob's Bargain.
Speaker 2:Hey, come on down to Bob's. We got everything you need. We got vaporizers, and if you need anything else, then what the fuck you doing?
Speaker 1:I just all I had to do. All I had to do is just find a piece of paper on the ground that had nothing important on it At least I hope I didn't Maybe a good-ass phone number, maybe a good-ass phone number, but I am gonna. I'm gonna lose this battle today. Fuck, that's what's spooky, the spookiest thing in the world around Halloween your own brain. It makes me burp. You should probably never smoke it because it makes you burp and it doesn't have any burping mechanisms in it.
Speaker 1:Um, what else was I gonna fucking talk about? I feel like I feel like I always want to tell you guys stuff and then I freaking forget. Um, oh, my buddy just asked me if I wanted to go golfing. That was they. Just he keeps asking me if I want to go golfing and I do. But they were so hungover like Zach and Owen looked like dog shit. They were like we're going to go golfing. They're like you could come and do your podcast on the golf cart. I was like, yeah, that would be fun as fuck, but I think I'll just stay here. Am I missing out on life? Yes, but do I have everything I own in a box to the left? Everything I own is in a box to the left and I would kill to know the rest of the lyrics. But I do not know the rest of the lyrics.
Speaker 2:You must not know about me, you must not know about me.
Speaker 1:I can have another box in a minute.
Speaker 2:I don't know what's inside of my boxes Cause when I was packing I was in a hurry hurry, so I got bathroom stuff and other stuff that doesn't belong with bathroom stuff.
Speaker 1:You must not know, bobby, you must not know, bobby.
Speaker 2:I got ADHD. For a minute had it since I was a cad Cause, I don't know why.
Speaker 1:Um, you must not know, bobby. You must not know. That's a fucking good, that's actually a good song. Oh what? And now I won't be able to stop hitting it. Cool, fuck, yeah, we did. We just got back from tour which was sick.
Speaker 1:I have been on the road consistently for by far the longest I ever have, and, man, I got to tell you I love the road, I love have. And man, I got to tell you I love the road, I love, I love it. I don't, I don't love this dude. Like some people are. Like I don't know the things people tell me they like when they travel, I'm like shut the fuck up. Like I like the fact that. Like when I wake up, I wake up and I go. I have no fucking idea where I am. That is fun. You have no idea what I feel like I wake up. Like you feel like you wake up like Jason Bourne, but like they didn't do a good job of erasing your brain. Like you woke up and you're like who am I when? I'm like I'm in south carolina what virginia.
Speaker 1:What does everything look? Where am I, what year is it and what city is it? What city is it in the year am?
Speaker 2:I in cincinnati in 2019? I sure fucking hope not.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we were just in. We were in Virginia, that was cool, and then we were in Philadelphia. God shout out to Philly, Philly. I don't know how to not have a good time when I'm there.
Speaker 1:I don't know how, I don don't know how to not have a good time when I'm there. I don't even know how to not have a good time when I'm in Philadelphia. We were in Philadelphia and it was a blast. Fucking so much fun. Dude Ryan Shaner came out and did a guest spot and we had so much fun. We were in that Dude.
Speaker 1:And here's the thing I'm just, I don't I. I I love stand-up and I love it and it's why we do this. It's like the, it's the main vein or whatever you want to say. But I am a fucking bitch for bits backstage. I love green room bit. Oh, my fucking god, it's so fun.
Speaker 1:And ryan shainer was killing dude. We were backstage and dude shainer has this bit where he is like a drunk guy and he's dude. He does the swallows. Well, because, like I feel like everyone does, like, you know, we all. I do it like when I do a drunk guy, I'm just like, and he me. When he's like, it's like it's not good, it's like way over the top.
Speaker 1:And shainer does this one where it's like it's not good, it's like way over the top. And shannon does this one where it's like, yes, he swallows at weird points he touched, he's like, he goes, come here, he puts his hand on people and we were back, dude, we were just back there. We were like laughing, smoking and, dude, there's just like. I feel like as a comic, that is, that's the best part, you know. It's like because it's like hey, did you like liar, liar? Yeah, but you're waiting for those credits at the end, you're waiting for the bloopers, you're waiting for the trials, you're waiting for the silly billies. Oh, you're waiting for that, dude. I, I remember all of the fucking, all the liar, liar ones.
Speaker 2:No wait, I didn't, oh, okay.
Speaker 1:He just pretends to catch a fish. God damn, oh God. I love bloopers.
Speaker 2:Your honor.
Speaker 1:And he just makes a swan. Got to be jim carrey. Got to be jim carrey, it's got to be awesome. Like everyone heard dude, it had to dude. Being jim carrey is awesome. Like now is a little bit more interesting because, like dude, everyone I know is like. I feel like everyone you know at one point shares the video where it's like Jim Carrey talking about. He was like yeah, I just I was in Hawaii and I they thought a missile was going to come and I tried to call my family and my phone didn't work. And I was like I'm Jim Carrey and they're like the phone still won't work. And he was like and then I just like sat on the beach and I just like looked out and he's like and I just thought about my life and I was really grateful and that moment always gets everybody. That moment really does always get everybody. But no one else in Hawaii was Jim Carrey. Everyone else on that beach was like I didn't do enough.
Speaker 2:I cheated on my family. I had a gambling problem.
Speaker 1:It's like this huge moment.
Speaker 2:And then, while you're having it, you're like ah, is that Jim Carrey sitting in a Lotus dance?
Speaker 1:You're just like, ah, you don't know what to do. You like run in the beach. It's like you're like that didn't feel good. You like don't know what to do and you're like, oh my god is jim carrey's in like this is that the pet detective? Oh my god. Jim carrey's like look at these idiots. Why didn't you just make a million dollars when you were younger? Why didn't you just make millions and millions of dollars?
Speaker 2:Oh my God, just Jim Carrey going like this.
Speaker 1:I would really like to meet that man one day. It would really mean a lot to me. I feel like as a comic, you will have that where you're like, oh, I'm going to make fun of someone who's like a figure and you're like it would really be nice to meet you though, mister Dude, my buddy, uh, he's a, he's a Kansas city comic. He um, uh, dude, he uh. He was like dude, I'm in. He texted me. He's like I am in the same room. He goes I'm literally sitting in the same room as Jim Carrey right now.
Speaker 1:I was like I can't. I love that you texted me. I can't even believe that you are sitting. You're in the same room as Jim Carrey, and then you thought of me. That's pretty cool. Will you text him? Will you get his number and ask him to text me? Someone has Jim Carrey's phone number. There's someone out there that's like fuck, I missed Jim Carrey's phone call. He was probably in Hawaii about to get blown up, blown to smithereens, just being like, yeah, blown up, blown to smithereens, just being like oh my God, it's all over.
Speaker 2:I was in the mask, I was in Dumb and Dumber.
Speaker 1:I just accepted my life. I do wonder if I'll do that, because sometimes when I'm on a plane you'll get turbulence and you'll hear someone be like, oh no, like you hear someone who values their life. I'm not saying I don't value my life, I am saying some people just value it. Like a lot. Like some people are still keeping the stickers on the hat of their life. Some people are really. Some people really are. They got a case for their life and they put it in there at night and they care about it.
Speaker 1:And some of the rest of us, when turbulence happens, you're like how would I feel? Would it tickle? Because whenever I get dude, I am. If you ever sit next to me on an air flight, on a flight of air, if you are ever sitting next to me on a flight, you are going to think I am terrified and I am having a hard time explaining to people that I'm not. I'm having a hard time explaining that I love it, but I get butterflies as an adult more than any other person, except for Randy Feltface the guy who's inside of Randy Feltface. We get the same thing. We both get that and I get it on flights and when it takes off, I literally this is what I do I grab my arms underneath, both armrests.
Speaker 1:I grab, grab underneath and I tighten myself down like I'm going to outer space. I tighten myself down like I'm Steve Buscemi. And what's that fucking movie? Apocalypse? It's definitely not apocalypse. Now, what's the fucking movie? What's that movie where ben affleck is like eating fucking animal crackers off the belly of his girlfriend? Yeah, I'm going out of space. This is what people do before they go to armageddon. What do people do before they go to outer space? They play with their food.
Speaker 2:Oh, I'm about to go on an asteroid, I don't know. I'm going with your dad. Hey, me and your dad gotta save the planet. Okay, but can you play with my tummy first, please?
Speaker 1:Alright, I'll play with your tummy, but then I really gotta go down to space.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna rewatch that movie. That movie is so fucking good. That movie is so God. That movie is so fucking good. That movie is so God. That movie is so fucking good. Bruce Willis is in it and, dude, bruce Willis is awesome Also. I dude.
Speaker 1:This is coming up pretty organically, but this is something that I was talking about. I was like I can't. I can't really turn this into a bit because I don't really talk about like that. I don't really talk about like human beings that are actually like. I talk about things that happen to me. I really talk about like Bruce Willis.
Speaker 1:But can Bruce Willis, can Bruce Willis, can we give him some space? Because like Bruce Willis, like is not doing well. If you don't know, bruce Willis is not doing well. If you don't know, Bruce Willis is not doing great. But what I don't like is that every time I open my phone, someone's like and Bruce Willis doesn't even know what a towel is anymore. You're like okay, bruce Willis has lost the ability to eat eggs. You're like, okay, it's like who is being super specific? Bruce willis says he doesn't even know what contemporary art is anymore. Bruce willis has lost the ability to watch birds. Bruce Willis can't hold binoculars anymore. You're like, okay, can we give this guy a break? So yeah, that's probably why the bit's not working. It's not great. But I also say it differently. I, yeah, what was I talking about From that to Armageddon? Oh, on a plane, that's what I do. I hold myself down that hard and I'm like and then I get the tickles.
Speaker 1:So I do feel like that. I feel like if the plane went down I'd be like and it would tickle my little belly off. Look, when I do this hold on, my mustache looks like the Batman symbol. I can do different kinds too. Let me try it. I'll do like, I'll try to do the Ben Affleck one, you know like the it's kind of a fat one, and then I can try to do like the classic one. And then which one to do like the classic one, and then, um, which one's the other one I can do? Um, I can't really do like Batman beyond cause I can't get it flattened up. Let me try it. I can kind of do the Batman mixed with Robin. One Hold on.
Speaker 2:Baby, here we go. I like it's the moon on the crane. Oh, the more I tend to do, the better I do yeah.
Speaker 1:You remain my power, my pleasure, my fate. And did you know that when it snows, my eyes become eyes and my parts become stinky again, baby, I can think and do a kiss from a rose from the dead.
Speaker 1:That song fucking rips. That song absolutely rips. And I'll say this I did grow up in the. I was born. I was born. I was born at the perfect time to enjoy Batman, because the first movie Shut the fuck up. The first movie came out in 1989. The fucking. That was the first Batman that was. I sound like such. I hate these kind of conversations. The first Batman was that one Came out in 1989. I was born in 1990. Which meant it had enough time for everyone to be like that's a pretty good Batman. So you have that movie, then you're a kid and by the time I'm what is it 1990, fucking? What is it 1992?
Speaker 2:Was it 1992 that they came out with the returns?
Speaker 1:god the cover is so good. Batman, right above him, batman catwoman and fucking the penguin. That one was so good. And then everyone like didn't really like the third one because, uh, val kilmer became batman. They didn't like love that. And then nicole kidman's like I leave my windows open at night and then it's so, it's that one and no one really likes that, but I do it's. I think it's great you got jim carrey once again playing the riddler. He's playing such a cool riddler now my brain's becoming your brain oh, god damn, what a cool, what a cool blender that was.
Speaker 1:And so you got that one, and that one was awesome. And then it's like was that though? I think that was the, was that whenever?
Speaker 2:oh the more I can't but it's like.
Speaker 1:So people are like, oh, it's not great, but it's still got a good like song. And then, yeah, the fourth one's not great because the ice man, you got the fucking Joe, you got the. What's the? What's that guy's name? Mr Freeze, you got Mr Freeze, this morpher, coming in. He's like they're like watching a musical, that's so stupid, I'm Mr White Christmas.
Speaker 1:I'm, I'm mr snow, so you got that one. And then mr snow is uh, yeah, he kind of he's like, but I'm not at the end of the movie. He's like diamonds are forever or whatever, and yeah, that one's. It's not as good, but it's like still when you were a kid, like it made sense, like I guess if you saw it in 1989 and you were 20, then yeah, I guess, like 10 years later you're like.
Speaker 2:I mean, they're making the fourth one and you watch it and you're like that fucking sucked.
Speaker 1:So it was like the perfect time. And now I get to watch this whole thing, like, go to shit, you know, like with, like the Jokeroker and all that stuff too. It is so fun. It is so fun to see that a musical went bad, because I do not like musicals. And as soon as I heard that the joker was going to be a musical, I was like, well, that's definitely not going to be good. I just don't get musicals.
Speaker 1:And there's things that I don't get that I get. Does that make sense? Like I don't want to really play dnd, but I have buddies that explain it to me and I'll be like okay, I'm like I get it. I do get why you like that, but I don't get why musicals I don't get it. Because it's like movies are already hard enough as you get older to be like all right, what's going on, but then for them to be like, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, we're going, we're going. It's like. It just seems like. It's just like how a little kid lives their life. They're like but I don't want to go to the park today.
Speaker 2:I just shit in my pants, you know.
Speaker 1:That's what a musical is. To me, it's a kid's thoughts. Ooh, the sweet sound of dying too young. Every puff you take takes off a year of your life. Well, I've tried, and I must have been one million years old, because I can't take the years off my life for fucking shit. You know, every cigarette takes off a minute.
Speaker 2:How many minutes I living, how many minutes I got to be alive.
Speaker 1:In stand-up. If you don't know, when you're about to wrap up your set, when you need to get off stage, someone in the back will give you a light and they'll like go like this. So you notice it. That would be so fun to have, that would be so fun to have. In life is like to be like someone. Like all of a sudden you just look in the back and someone's like you got five years left you're like you, bobby, you shouldn't talk like that.
Speaker 1:You've never slept in a car, so um, and you never will. That's a batman line. I never thanked you and you ain't got to do that. Bloopers from Batman.
Speaker 2:Rachel. Should I say her last name? I don't know, he would not. Where are they? I mean she.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they would be so unfunny. You want to know? I got these cars cars.
Speaker 2:I actually did hear that the joker.
Speaker 1:Whenever he was going to blow up the hospital. Which way they did blow up. He was actually hitting the button and for some reason the demo team couldn't get it to go, so that was real that whole moment, that whole thing you saw was not even acting, it was real.
Speaker 1:So imagine being in that moment You're like and you want to be like what's going on. But then they blew up a building. We're in a building. Did that make my microphone go off? If I hit my vape? Just right, do you hear that? Maybe it'll make it go out whenever I perfect my podcast sound. That's what the thing that goes on my throat's gonna sound like soon. Oh, I used to be funny. Now I talk like this and I'm the funniest ever to live. Could you imagine, bobby, with this? They would not have the batteries to go. I should.
Speaker 1:You shouldn't make fun of those. It's just something you make fun of because you barely see those anyway, do they? Is that a hey? I definitely don't want to get hate from just asking a question, so I will look it up later, as I do every podcast, in case I made a mistake, because we're all here to learn, aren't we? And that's what we're going to do. We're going to end with something. We're all here to learn.
Speaker 1:You know, sometimes you think you know everything, you know. Sometimes you're like, aha, I've got all the answers. I think I'm so smart, and then you still trip and spill coffee all over you, and then you go, god damn it. And then you look around and you're like well, now everyone thinks I'm crazy. So that's a learning experience. Maybe just look around and don't try to. You don't have to listen to one song on your walk home. You don't have to do that. You don't have to order a hot coffee. You don't have to order a hot coffee and then be walking through a parking lot that's very uneven and trip and then think that you're going to spill coffee all over your hands, scream and people are going to think you're normal. So that's just what we learned today. If we've learned anything, we've learned that so, love one another.
Speaker 1:The planet's getting hot. So please, please, you know, stop that shit. Please, stop that shit from happening. We're so tired of the world getting hot. I live in austin and it's actually like because it's the end of october, and it's like what can I? I could wear, I could literally like, go outside and just shorts. It's kind of nice, but like, not everyone gets that, but we do, and I'm like well, it's always hot, texas, but fuck, it's gotta be because of global warming and so on. So it's like that's not good for everybody, but I like it. So that's the podcast. I hope you fucking who cares? All right, you get you fucking you. You girls go, do you?
Speaker 2:you go, you, you go, you all right, that's bye. That's it, that's the pod bye.