Be The Ball PodBoffins Daily

BTB Daily May 28

BTB Tour Season 1 Episode 13

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 33:58

Send us Fan Mail

Big Marn of the Year nominations are revealed. Grand Slam champions remembered. A little bit of Origin and a whack of Timmy Rawmeatakiss on his Wrangler Ranch take.

SPEAKER_04

46 men raised their fists to compete in 48 weeks of brutal competition throughout the Beat the Ball 18 season. Now, with just one weekend left of battle, there are eight men in the big basket bets tipping, still fighting. They have one more step, one more punch, one more round to become a legend of the Beat the Ball Tour. The punter of the year sees its last eight punters up at the plate. It's now or never for these men. The time has come, gentlemen, to produce. Produce or perish. Glory finds the gladiator.

SPEAKER_05

Let's get one thing straight. This is shooter's toy. I've worked hard my whole life, paid my dues, and now it's shooter's turn. And shooter's not about to let his rain at the top be spoiled by some freak. Sideshow clown.

SPEAKER_04

Hello, hello, hello, all you beat the ballers out there. This time next week, we will be touching down in Adelaide. Some of us may be already there on our pushbikes, who knows? But the rest of us will be flying in for an enormous first night of celebration of the Be the Ball tour on the Thursday. I've just got to cut you off there, Ron. I've got to say I am so pumped after that intro. You did really well there. I want to get out on the field and after last night and today. Oh yeah, baby, I can feel every cell in my body just trying to explode.

SPEAKER_03

How good were the blues blues blues last night, eh? Yes, yes, Calen got sent off, but you know, you can't go in there and be so brutal, mate. You know, he led with his head, he led with his shoulder, and poor old Cola, he's gone flat. That's it, in the Seagulls they are smewing, mate. Spewing 'cause they lose a player, and meanwhile, Mr Ponga, the pinger ponga, he gets off, mate. Nothing. Not a he gets a fine. He got thirty grand for showing up and doing fifty seven minutes of work, mate.

SPEAKER_04

Well, Murray, I've never heard you uh put together a soliloquy almost of that magnitude. Oh well done, you were pumped. Too hard it was, mate, got the blues, loved it blues.

SPEAKER_01

Well after the first fifty odd minutes you'd think they were gonna need a cattle dog blue in there, wasn't it? They were terrible that first twenty minutes. My goodness. It looked like they were asleep.

SPEAKER_02

I even stayed up for this game, and I've got to tell you, it was uh very entertaining, but I do have one major, major problem with the game, and I am absolutely disgusted with something that happened out there last night.

SPEAKER_04

The Carlin Ponger incident? No. Cameramaster's head who?

SPEAKER_02

No.

SPEAKER_01

James today scores pass when they had a five on one and he fucked it up royally.

SPEAKER_02

No.

SPEAKER_01

Well, what is it then?

SPEAKER_02

The treatment of the elderly in this country. I have to say I was thoroughly disappointed and disgusted when they woke that old man up on the bench in his blue tracksuit, gave him essentially a kid's toy, and said, Now run all the way out there through the rain and through the cold, try not to catch pneumonia while you're at it, and give that to the guy in the headband. That's a kicking tea. Nathan Cleary needed it to kick a goal. I don't give a shit if it was a cream pay and was about to feed a family of eight. The treatment of that old man was dead set disgusting, and that's all I'm gonna say about that.

SPEAKER_04

All right, then uh you make sure you put in a formal complaint in writing, because that's what you do when you're that old. Uh blow it out your ass, run. He is fired up the big fellow. I like to say it, you know. His nice fourth day pitched hand is now turning into a summer glow. Oh, look at him, he is. Well, just covering that game. We don't get to cover State of Origin one normally at any stage for the Beat the Ball because obviously we're it's the night before the tour and all through the house. Not a creature is stirring. Oh well, they're all stirring, cheering, shouting, and all that stuff. But uh this year we get to have a quick look at it. Uh the blue's awful, first twenty minutes. Uh don't know what happened there. Laurie Daly, he's the most I've I think he cried twice last night. Well, once early, because he can't believe how bad it was and how low his career was about to sink. And then at the end when Tedesco, who, let's be honest, had to make up for a pretty ordinary error, only ten minutes earlier, went up, took the ball, came down, scored a try. So he's probably got himself a spot in State of Origin 2 now. Uh and Brian To, how about his form? Oh, he was terrible. Fair income. It's like they put instead of spray, they put, you know, olive oil on his hands or something. He got up what he lost to three times playing the ball. That's under six shit. Next next camp they get together. That first day, they should put him, Big Olaquatu, and also who was the third one? Crichton, the crudder. They should put them aside and ending goal and say, you boys can come and join the big boys when you learn how to play the ball properly.

SPEAKER_01

Ashley Klein he'd be popular in Queensland today, wouldn't he?

SPEAKER_04

Ho, ho, ho ho, ho. Well, no more popular than what was in New South Wales when he sent off Sue uh a few years ago. Come on. Uh what's good for the goose is good for the gander. And Caitlin, let's be honest, it was a reckless tackle, but I didn't expect him to get sent off. I must admit, origin has changed.

SPEAKER_03

Too right it has, mate. Back in the old days, even the guy who got hit would have stood up and said, good hit, mate.

SPEAKER_04

It was a bit of smoker caller, that's for sure.

SPEAKER_01

He was gone, the big follower.

SPEAKER_04

And Nathan Cleary, quite cleary-esque in that Broncos grand final of only a few years ago, and that last 20 minutes he scored a try, just did what you should be doing, hit a hole, and it was a lovely little bit of work for Braille out of dummy half. Hit a hole, goes through, scores a try, he puts up the bomb right down and has come down right on the goal line. That's where you want those kicks, and in the big minutes, under big pressure, he has produced again, and there's a couple other bits and pieces, but uh he's a fabulous footballer, Nathan Cleary. I don't give a shit what anyone says.

SPEAKER_03

I noticed one of the boys in the chat said his eyes are too close together.

SPEAKER_02

Now that would be the King Brown skipper, I believe, saving Private. I saw that as well. Uh and judging by some of his other comments, he was only looking out at one eye, and I'm not even sure if it was one in the big head or the little head because uh he was babbling ball and he wasn't happy at all. Isn't he born and bred in New South Wales, lives in Dubbo? Why does he go for Queensland and the Broncos? Each to their own. He's always been a little different. Some days that's good, some days it's bad, but that's just ran being ran.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, Ron, what do you think about all this talk from the media that Cleary's got to dominate its state of origin? Well, I think it's a ho heap of horseshit, to be totally honest. I think it's a media story uh that they like to beat up, blow up and write something about. I mean, Andrew Johns, they all, you know, pontificate as if he's the greatest thing since sliced bread, that the good lord himself delivered him by hand to the world. Let's be honest, Joey played nearly as many games at Hooker, if not as many, as he did at Halfback. He couldn't even get the number one halfback spot there for years, so I think it's all a beat up. I think Cleary's one of the best footballers I've ever seen, and and that's all I'm gonna say about that. Beat the Ball Grand Slam champions Well today's show is about revealing the nominations for the Big Man of the Year. But before we get to that, I thought we'd have a quick little look back at the two Grand Slam champions that we've we've got in the Beat the Balls. Been going for 18 years as we know. Uh but to get the big four pillar trophies, Triple B's Punter of the Year, Big Man of the Year, and Mum's Bum Cup Champion, that's no easy feat. There's only those four are only given out once a year, and the Big Man of the Year is actually only given out uh to one person selected by one person generally. Uh it's a very difficult thing to do, but these two gentlemen, and we're talking about uh Roger Latdeaver, of course, and Ryan Stone Graham, they are the two that are the only ones to achieve this magnificent feat.

SPEAKER_01

I'd like to add to that. I think yep, they're the four majors within the be of the ball. No problems in the world with that, and that's what every serious player or competitor within the group, and let's be honest, a lot of the boys are just here for the social good teams, and not a problem with any of that at all. But those guys who like to try and achieve and compete and win stuff, or you know, just have a real crack at things, they're the four. But just below them these days has to be the Tattoo Trophy champion, the MVP and the club champion. They're there.

SPEAKER_03

Well I'd also throw in them, Mate we've got to have things like uh who is the Hall of Famous, who is the Life members, stuff like that.

SPEAKER_04

I'm really glad you brought that up, Mario, because I know for a fact that come Beat the Ball Twenty, there is gonna be a lot of stuff revealed on in that season. Carnival's told me some of it, and right now they're reviewing those things, the captains, and are realigning them, and then there will be announcements throughout the course of Beatle Ball Twenty, uh, of who is where in the zoo, uh what they've achieved, uh and they'll all be recognised, uh applauded and rewarded.

SPEAKER_02

So I think that's wonderful. There have been two great players, uh, Roger and Graham, uh, no doubt about it. But uh I don't know if the shane's gone off the penny a little bit with those two. They're not getting any younger, let's be honest. Uh but to win all four, magnificent. They've both been the only two there for quite a while now, and it'll be interesting to see if we get any more join them in the near future. Hats off to you two gentlemen, by the way. Well done.

SPEAKER_04

Oh well, there are a handful who are sitting just under it with three, two, things like that. So it'd it'd be wonderful. They are the two heads on the Mount Rushmore of the Bee the Ball Grand Slam. Uh maybe there will be another couple going there over the next few years. Who knows? But uh just wanted to shout out to you boys and say well done. You're never forgotten, it's on the website. You can go and click on it if anyone wants to read their stories, how they've done it, uh, and anyone who's aspiring to win competitions and become a legend of the Bee The Ball Tour, as it's all recorded, as you know, look no further than those two. Graham stepping out for the shooters this weekend, trying to win his second mum's bum cup. And Roger, uh one of the uh favourites in the street corner tip, he'll be doing the same. They'll both be looking to add to their titles, and uh one of them may even get a mention in the Big Man of the Year nominations coming up very shortly.

SPEAKER_02

Or walk do you do? Get out.

SPEAKER_04

Big man of the year nominations. Well, it's about this time of the year normally that Craig's Carnival comes in and discusses with us the Big Man nominations, but this year he is sitting out of it, and that's for one very good reason. There's been a major push by the captains for him to be nominated.

SPEAKER_01

AC, good on the captains. It's great to see them banding together and putting their foot down and saying, No, we don't give a shit what you want, this is what we want.

SPEAKER_04

So uh I'm sure we'll get to that. That's right, we'll be covering the nominations and uh going through why they were nominated, and of course the eventual the BTB 18 Big Man of the Year will be revealed on tour on the Thursday night.

SPEAKER_03

Has Carnival never won their Big Man of the Year award? That's a very surprise to me.

SPEAKER_02

Gotta say me too, but when you think about it, he's the one who decides each season, so he'd never nominate himself. It's not his star, so maybe the captains are under something here.

SPEAKER_04

Maybe, maybe not. But he's up against some very stiff competition if he is nominated, which he is, and we'll cover him at the end. Uh but we've got some great names up there. Boys who and men, sorry, not boys, men who have done absolutely amazing and fantastic things for the group. Selfless things. It is by far and away Carnival's favourite award, uh, the big man of the year. It's a Clubman of the Year award, essentially, as we know. And it's for those guys who are selfless in what they do. They support the tour in various ways. It doesn't have to be financially, it can be in in all sorts of ways. Service to the tour, looking after other people within the tour. Uh and but the one underlying pin for all of these nominee nominees are they don't seek to be recognized or rewarded or patted on the back by people. They do this because they want to do it, because they believe in the tour and they believe in the men that are on the tour, and and they just want to contribute. And to me, that's one of the most wonderful things you can do in life is contribute humbly, uh, under the shadows of you know the bright lights and things like that, just behind the scenes, doing your best for everyone else. So all of these nominees are extremely worthy, put it that way.

SPEAKER_02

Looking at some of these names on the big man of the year champion boards, and I tell you what, that's a history right there in itself.

SPEAKER_04

Well, of course, all the way back in Be the Ball 1, it was high-stepping Higo who won it the first year. He donated an air conditioner that year, came down to City and installed it to the winner, uh Brad Bone Crusher Brad. He lasted for decades. That was a wonderful prize. That was worth a lot of money. Mickey B. McKenna's won it, come later, Ronstey, who's back on tour for the first time in seven years. He designed the first ever Crocs logo. I've said that as many times as Damian Cook is a beach sprinter. Bone Crusher Brad, he's won it before. He uh drove the buses for us for many years, you know. He uh did a lot of other stuff around that as well. Yeah, and the crouching Glenn, he's won it twice. The only man to have won it twice. Well, he organized tours for the Beatleball for many years and always was putting in behind the scenes, Glenn, a great beater baller. He's had some tough times recently, which many of us have been following along, but he seems to be coming out the other side, which is great. Cement tears, Kev, there's a blast from the past.

SPEAKER_03

He was one of my favourites, Kevy, you know, the mayor of Walgarth. He was one of the great bookies, and we went on a run in Beatleball 5 at Cairns when he was given our tips left, right, and centre, and we were just cleaning up. It was sensational.

SPEAKER_04

Crying Out Loud's another one now. No one can dispute how much he's given. There's a name for us. Handemonium, uh, 64. He won it. That's and thoroughly deserved. You know, that's a legendary award in within the walls of the BTB. Nicker B. Rising, he won it. He did the triple B's for a few years. That's a time-consuming job, you know. And on top of everything else he was doing, that was a fabulous uh Rhin Stone Graham, of course, devastating Dave. They're just some of the boys who have won it over the years. Their most recent winner was Warwick Farmfeller. He's been on tour for 16 of the 18 years or 17 of the 18 years. Uh, he's been on the golf committee, he's done a lot of work, a lot of service over a long time. So it was wonderful for him. Lonro Leber, there's another legend of the tour. Leber's done just as much over the years. Saving Private, of course. Been here since Tour 2, done a lot of stuff, been a captain of the King Browns since day Dot, has also helped out with many, many things. So all of these boys have given selfishly to the tour, and the one that we add this season will join that illuminary bunch right there. So it's nothing to be sneezed at, especially when you consider all that it takes to make this tour work every season.

SPEAKER_01

Number 78, Ontran Wes.

SPEAKER_04

Cattle Dog.

SPEAKER_03

Go your cattle dogs, woof woof. There he is, Wes, our man, the Chucky Norris. Great to see him.

SPEAKER_04

He is our first nomination for the year, and he has taken over as our top sponsor. Aristocrat for many years was, of course, under Hendo. Uh no longer with Aristocrat. We've now got Wes who stepped into the breach and he is uh a fantastic supporter of the tour, always has been. You know, he came in, be the ball ten, almost off the bench, back up, Maruchidor it was, uh, and we'd had a couple of boys who couldn't make it late, and uh he came in off the bench and uh Carnival or no thought that he may only be filling in for one year, but Wes loved it so much, he stuck around and he has been a huge part of things, and I think he is a fabulous nomination. Yeah, you can't complain about that. He's well liked uh the yellow jacket a couple of years ago. He's a fabulous fella. He he loves getting away with the boys and touring. Uh this year he has to travel a bit. Normally we're going up his neck of the woods, but uh he'll be over at Adelaide and no doubt he'll have the thermals on because I think we all might need him.

SPEAKER_01

Hey, well done, Wes. Absolutely fabulous to have you nominated, couldn't agree more.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, pretty damn good that, Chucky. Number thirty-eight, Roger that diva. Croc. Roger the Dodger's got a look in again, hey?

SPEAKER_04

He certainly has. He's been an integral part of the tour for many years, and Roger this year alone, let's just say, he has helped organise the accommodation. He is on the golf committee and helping organise all of the golf committee. He's filled various roles over the years and has always been totally tuned in to the Be the Ball tour. As a Croc, Snap Snap, we're very proud that he has been nominated again. And I know that Carnival has he thinks he's done an absolutely outstanding job, not just this year, but over many years with different many ways. He loves being part of the tour, so he is our second nomination for Big Man of the Year. Uh thoroughly deserved there too, nor complaints on this end. No, me either. Roger's uh he normally got a BD BTB tattoo on his ass, I'd reckon. He loves it that much.

SPEAKER_03

I don't know, mate, you know, I still can't get over. What happened to the cattle dogs a few years ago?

SPEAKER_04

Well, you're just gonna have to get over it, so well done, that's nomination two, Roger that Diver.

SPEAKER_01

Number ninety. Tank Rider Jace. King Brown.

SPEAKER_02

Whoop there he is. Womp there he is. Jeez, he's been nominated for a few years in a row now. When he when's the carnival gonna give him the bloody award?

SPEAKER_04

Well, it doesn't always work like that, you know that in defense of Carnival. Uh Tank Rider Jace thoroughly deserved again. He has had a tough year with a few health things, and you know what? He just keeps getting up and keeps stepping forward, moving on. Uh he's a a fabulous guy who supports the tour and has from his very first day within the tour. I think he's he's at his five-year anniversary for now, uh, and is I'm looking forward as one day getting up there and having a chat with him, seeing how he's going. Uh, but he's supported the tour through AAA Racing. You will see that on all the promo merchandise gear. Uh and once again, you can't go past him and his willingness to be a part of the be the ball and want to do and help the boys around the tour. Yeah, he's a tough bugger. I'll give him that uh tank rider. He nothing holds him down for long, and he just thoroughly deserves, as you keep saying, and we keep saying about all of them, because they do deserve it. No, he's uh to be on this list, and I'll tell you what, there's some pretty a pretty esteemed company in there right now, just quietly.

SPEAKER_03

Too right there is, mate. There's some good good names coming up through here.

SPEAKER_01

Number twenty-nine Barnesy's boy Dave. Shooter.

SPEAKER_04

There he is, good old Cambo. Wonderful to see him nominated. He's doing he's done a lot for the tour the last few years, hasn't he? Well, Carnival has been at Strange to point out that Dave has been part of this tour for 15 years. He's taken over uh official tour photography duties where he and Carnival get around and take lots of pics of the tour. Uh he's did that without being asked. He's jumped in and done it for the last four or five years running now. He has been an absolute stalwart of the tour, one of the most popular men on tour, and he's helped out in different ways around the traps over the years, and uh we think it's just time that he was mentioned and nominated, and uh there he is, he's up in lights. He could be the big man of the year, who knows? Congratulations, Cambo.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, well done, Dave. I like Dave, except that maybe driving in the golf carts with him, him and Jimmy I sort of steer away from. Uh but it's good for him to be finally you recognize, you know?

SPEAKER_04

Well he does get around a little bit incognito underneath those shades some years, but uh so well done, Barnes' boy Dave. Congratulations on your nomination. Number one Kriggs Carnival Wrangler Well that's the first time we've ever heard the number one badge holder's name being mentioned, and he's asked me to ask you, Sandy, because you're going to comment on his behalf, being the a Wrangler, you know, mascot leader, all those things along with Sideshow Sam.

SPEAKER_01

He he has he he he said to me Sandy, if they put my name up there, which they seem hell bent on doing, uh I want you to say two words.

SPEAKER_03

No, what do they be, mate? What are the two words? I can't wait, this is exciting.

SPEAKER_01

Nor comment.

SPEAKER_03

No no mate, what what were the words?

SPEAKER_01

They were the words, you bulls or nor comment.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, that's not much. You've got to give more than that. That's that's tight ass bullshit. You know, you can't just say no comment. Well, to be fair, I think we need to give this a little bit of context as to why he may be saying no comment. If we take a couple of steps back, uh I'm pretty sure that uh the captain of the Crocs early in the season had decided that it's about time that Carnival was recognised, and he and the other captains they got together and uh apparently they formed as one and they've given Carnival a pretty hard time right through the year. He's resisted, he said no, don't worry about it.

SPEAKER_02

That seems to be the sort of fella he is. He doesn't seek uh recognition for that name too much through here.

SPEAKER_04

Well he says that name as of less as as possible. This time of year you hear a little bit from Carnival, but that's just to make sure and let all the boys know what's happening with regard to the tour. Uh but that's where it's come from. The skippers have been adamant, they've been butting heads all year with Carnival over this, uh, and eventually he has relented a little, but he doesn't want to make a big thing of it.

SPEAKER_03

I honestly can't believe Ma he doesn't already have one.

SPEAKER_04

Well you can't pick yourself, can you?

SPEAKER_03

No, fair point, you can, but everyone's not gonna like that. That's for damn sure. Ask Ashley Klein.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I don't know about the nomination personally. Seriously, what's he done? Yeah, he's badge holder number one, he's been here for eighteen tours. Uh he's got his fingerprints over just about bloody everything that's in the tour. I I don't know, I don't see why he should be nominated for that sort of stuff.

SPEAKER_01

Well it was he and his brothers that started this whole thing back when, you know, 2009 be the ball won.

SPEAKER_02

I was only pulling your leg, mate. Of course he should be nominated. Don't know if he should get it or not. He's not going to pick himself, is he? That's a fascinating thing about this whole thing, isn't it? He's not going to pick himself at all. No way in the world.

SPEAKER_04

Well, I think the captains the skippers may have something up their sleeves with regard to that. But anyway, they're the nominations for this year. I think you boys will agree, uh, thoroughly deserved. There's some special mentions that Carnival asked us to put out. Mario, you have these?

SPEAKER_03

Yes, these were the boys who were very close, so close a bees noodle away from being a nominator for big man of the year. Could be that Condor for the shooters.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, good choice. Condo must have it must have been a bees noodle.

SPEAKER_03

That's it. John O bee stiffla from the crocs.

SPEAKER_01

Hey the stiffmeister got a look in. Well, I suppose he did move to Adelaide for the Crocs and the tour. I know he sent a very long detailed message to Carnival to help out with a selection of pubs and and clubs around the area over there. So yeah, nice little tick there for John O.

SPEAKER_03

Strengthen Johnna from the Crocs?

SPEAKER_04

Yep, he's helped out uh over the years actually by going and visiting places in his travels. I think he's had a quiet year this year, John. He's only been, you know, overseas eleven times in the twelve months, but uh he generally sends back some info and intel and uh and helps out around the traps and edges where he can. So strength and john, a big tick for him as well.

SPEAKER_03

Grunting Growin from the shooters?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, he's stepped up and taken a spot on the golf committee. He's done a lot of work behind the scenes organizing all that. Not easy tasks, these for most of the guys, you understand. There's a fair bit you've got to organise and follow up on through the year. So Grunt and Growen, it's nice to see his first nomination for Big Man of the Year.

SPEAKER_01

Well, he's not actually nominated, these are the bees noodles away from there.

SPEAKER_04

Oh yeah, well it's good to be a bee's noodle away from there. Well done, Grunton, with your bees noodle.

SPEAKER_03

And Bendal Varicci from the King Browns.

SPEAKER_02

Ah, well, what a surprise this is.

SPEAKER_03

No, I'm just fucking with your money.

SPEAKER_02

Ah, fuck off, Lurry.

SPEAKER_04

Well there you are. Congrats to all those boys who were very close to being nominated for Big Man of the Year. And without doubt, I want to congratulate and once more recognise the five men who are in final contention for Be the Ball 18 Big Man of the Year. They are Ontrend Wes, Roger that Diva, Barnesy's boy Dave, Tank Rider Jace, and Craig's Carnival.

SPEAKER_03

Who is Skippy Goldenbaum?

SPEAKER_04

Okay, well joining us now for the last time before we are on tour is Timmy Rawmeterkiss. Great to have you back here again, Timmy.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah, I wish I could say the same, but I can't nah. Not very happy to be here, but uh you know, think fuck those chopper rides are nearly finished. My goodness.

SPEAKER_04

Well, you just heard the nominations for Big Man of the Year, one of, if not the most prestigious award out there. Uh if we can just we want to keep this short, so one word on each of the nominees, if you will, Timmy. On TrendWest. Pretender. Roger the Duver. Sandrap. Barnsy's boy Dave. Tosser.

SPEAKER_03

This isn't going the way it should be, I don't think, Ron.

unknown

Shh.

SPEAKER_04

Tank Rider Jace. Toolwilt. And Craig's Carnival. Wanker. Tell us what you really think, Timmy. What don't you?

SPEAKER_01

No worries, big nose.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, it is, and I'm very proud of it, thank you very much. Alright, just getting this back on. You went out to the ranch for the Wranglers, and how was that? You've been pretty scathing in your roasting of all the other teams. I imagine today's not going to be much different. You don't see seem to me to be the type of fellow that sees the uh positives in much.

SPEAKER_01

I look for the truth, thank you very much. And that's all I look for. While everyone else holds hands and tells each other how good they are. I actually find the truth, find the weaknesses, and push my thumb into the bullet holes. That's my job. And so I went out to the Wranglers to do exactly the same. I don't answer to you boys, I answer to those above you. And when you work that out, you will understand things a lot better in the world of Timmy Romelekiss.

SPEAKER_02

Ho fucking ham.

SPEAKER_01

You Ben are just lucky I don't kick your pensioner ass all over the joint. I don't hit elderly people, not on purpose anyway. That once or twice was accidental and they were just nearby collateral damage. But you I am going to resist. Ah, who cares, Timmy? You're full of it. Well it's gonna be a little bit hard to get stuck into the Wranglers, is it not? They're uh the current defending THC Premiership champions, and let's look at it honestly, shall we, Timmy? They look like doing it again this year unless there is some mean a miracle that occurs with regard to the mum's bum cup. Oh I wouldn't be getting too ahead of myself if I was you. I know you like to get out there and ponce around with those boys. Well I tell you what, it ain't over till it's over, Sunshine, and it certainly ain't over yet. You guys are going to go ratchet in the mum's bum cup, so it might be a slippery slope to hell for you fellas. He dirt it. Arrogance, wankiness. That's exactly the type of attitude I found out there at the ranch. Yeah, it may be pretty, and yeah, you may have added thousands of hectares after your last win, and sure there are really good looking cowgirls everywhere, some of them not even wearing much more than their boots, but that doesn't sway me from my focus on my job.

SPEAKER_04

Alright, well let's get into that right now and go through some of the players and what you think and how they've gone this year. Robert's pocket rocket, let's start with him.

SPEAKER_01

One of the most laid back characters I've ever come across. He just walks around there with his pocket rocket on the ranch, and he doesn't do a lot to be totally honest, but he is one of those boys and they love him and he's part of that Wrangler team. But I want to see him do more, produce a little bit more. Give me something. He's a vanilla wafer. I want a little bit more flavour in my biscuit if you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_03

I'm a bit peckish, actually.

SPEAKER_01

Shut up, Big Nose. Guldigger Gavaby's had an absolutely sensational year. Top out for the triple B's done all eight on the punt. He's no chance for the golf butt, is he? No, no. He just won't put down the shovel. He just keeps digging and digging and digging. Eventually you're gonna find a nugget or two, ain't ya? Well he gets out there in those pontsy Leotars that they put on, and you know what they've built for him out there, fellas at Wankerville? They have built a swimming pool that he can ride his state of the art push bike in that he can also run in. They have developed joggers for him like horseshoes, except they're humour shoes, and he his triathlon career is about to resurge. I will give him that. He is a competitor, Gav, but I tell you what, they had to pinch him from another team, didn't they? The crocs was it that he came from? I believe we had him the year before and he was pinched from us. Listen here, you ginger head git. Speaking of ginger heads, what is this? Do they collect them or something out there? Gingerbread men, do they? Out at Wranglerville? Because I tell ya, there is more gingers out there than you'd find at a Ronald MacDonald convention.

SPEAKER_03

Really, mate, I had never given that much thought.

SPEAKER_01

Well that matches every other thing you thought of, doesn't it, Mario?

SPEAKER_03

You sounded a little bit like Bruce then. I'm a little bit scared. Can you please cut it back a bit?

SPEAKER_01

You just toughen up, Princess. Yeah, well they've got look at him next to Winnaith. Man Mountain. He just walks around their shirt off, carrying a sledgehammer bigger than most other people, and he's a bit of a ginger, is he not? And then you got Smitty Win who bounces round like a little puppy dog in a cartoon. That guy has more energy than you can poke a stick at. And he loves the Wranglers, he loves the tour, and he loves being in the ginger heads a combination that they've got. Oh, don't forget High Wire Will. Oh, I bought that up with Will. You want to push someone's buttons? Call him a ginger. He is strawberry blonde as far as he is concerned, whatever the fuck that means. But oh I tell you he does not like it, but he loves the boys, loves them out there because they're all winners. And that's the problem when you go out to visit the champion team, and which they are at the moment, and granted, yes, looks like they're gonna go a long way to doing it again, and be the first back to back fuckers since the Crocs in twenty fourteen, twenty fifteen or thirteen fourteen, whatever it was, but it's been a handful of years, and uh they're only their third year in. That must make the King Browns cry into their soup pen.

SPEAKER_02

For starters, we don't eat soup, we eat beans, and lots of them.

SPEAKER_01

Well that would explain their wind problem, wouldn't it?

SPEAKER_04

Well, next to when Nate doesn't look like he's going to be there, so that's going to hurt them. Smitty Wim will be there, but not many are tipping him to do much in the Mum's Bum Cup, high wire will similar. Uh Water Tank Matt had a magnificent season. How did you find him?

SPEAKER_01

I found him out the back in one of their big glorious sheds at the ranch, and he had his hand on a wood stump, and he had one of the sharpest, largest knives I've ever seen. Not sa not one since Rambo have I seen that can do that much damage. And he was just playing tic-tac-toe between his fingers, working out which one he was gonna lop off next because this man ain't afraid to give a little bit of pain, to make a donation for victory, to give a part of his body and soul. And I tell you he is uh the man to beat in the Triple B's. We all knew that, but is he? There's been a lot of ruffies the last few weeks, but he is the man to beat there. He was very high up in the Tattoo Trophy events right through the season. He is gonna be somewhere in that finish you'd imagine, and his golf he has been working diligently at, and he is even vowed to put the big dog away if needed. He's down to eight fingers after taking off his second tour finger. He may have to get some put back on at a later date, and at this stage we know he's only looking at ten tours maximum before he gets all nubby on us, but the tank, do not underestimate this beast. He is a player.

SPEAKER_02

What about the skipper? Skipper, so I chose Sam, what does he do?

SPEAKER_01

Oh, he just gets on the iron these days, pumps the iron out there. He can't wipe the smile off his doll. He just walks around thumb hitched into his jeans and just looks at the boys and says, How good is this? How good is life? I love the beat the ball. Oh, and why wouldn't he? I can sit there and take the piss all I want, but the bottom line is if he wins it again this year with his team, that's going to mean two of the first three years they have won premierships. That's hard to argue with. Although y there's not much he can do from my end except say maybe some of the other teams should replicate a little bit of the Wrangler into their strategies and philosophies. Like how to be better tossers than most. I think you're getting a bit I'm sitting here quite happy and laughing at a lot over Timmy Sam because no matter what he says and no matter what crap he lays on the Wranglers, bottom line is they've been very good the last two years, and I'd be surprised if uh they ain't good again next year, and possibly the year after. We might be in the middle of a dynasty. Whoa, whoa, whoa there, Sandy.

SPEAKER_04

I think you're getting way ahead of yourself. They have gone extremely well and are going well, and they're a good team. But don't forget there's a little thing called the player draft coming in Beat the Ball 19, and there's going to be a tweak to that, as there always is by the game maker. And then secondly, we have the Beatle Ball 20 tour. Big announcements coming. I have a little inside information that you are not aware of, my friend, that may change this whole thing up big time.

SPEAKER_01

Well, it doesn't really matter because we're sitting in Be the Ball Air 10 right now. We're seven days out from being on tour, and the Wranglers are gonna be there en masse. I wouldn't say en masse, you're gonna be missing a couple or we're missing a couple. What dock farm fella, where was he when you were out there, Timmy? I didn't see Wok. I'm never sure where he is. He goes for long walks through the forests out there apparently. He gets on particularly well with the animals, uh, but he's uh taken a flight overseas to see his brother for his eightieth birthday, I think.

SPEAKER_03

I didn't realise Wok was that old, mate.

SPEAKER_01

I don't think it's Wok that is eighty somehow, Mario. He's gone over there. Uh when I did see him he was in the salon state of the art salon with constant permanent hairdressers, uh barbers, whatever you like. There's even a shearer in there if that's what you feel like. Some of their backs get a bit uh thick with hair as you know, and uh other parts of their body, so they get the shearer onto it. But uh Wok was getting a lovely colour and blow dry the last time I saw him, and I think for England at this time of the year, it's a little bit lighter over there. Uh the boys were all pushing him to go back for the Bondi Blonde, uh, but we're not quite sure whether he's done that or not. He left with a scarf over his head, wishing the boys all the best for the tour.

SPEAKER_04

Well, that's about it, Timmy. I'm sure you want to get going, and I know that we're not far away and we've got a lot to get done, concentrate on, set up and prepare for the tour. Sephi Moore sleeps, how good's this? Render the weekly countdown.

SPEAKER_01

Yep, that's me, fellas. Thank you for having me in. I have done my job. You will be hearing from me in the near future. Bruce has promised that, and I will follow that promise up to the hilt. Until later, ta ta.

SPEAKER_02

You know, there are whispers that Bruce may be retiring very soon, and he does sound a lot like his cousin, Timmy Romedekis.

SPEAKER_03

Is Bruce's surname Romitakis?

SPEAKER_02

No, no, it's not.

SPEAKER_04

Uh I'll I'll tell you about that later. I'm just getting back to what you said there, Ben. Uh would be interesting. I don't know that you retire from the business he's in though. I think you get retired if you know what I'm saying. Either way, I've got a feeling that we're gonna be seeing a lot more of Timmy, and he really gets me agitated and uh scares me a little and all those things, you know. I'm there I'm always on edge around him. I just need a uh I might need one of your fine wines in a minute there, Ben.

SPEAKER_02

Don't worry about that, there's not many left I can tell you. Oh my goodness, I'm gonna have to check into rehab by the time we get off this coach.

SPEAKER_04

Alright, uh, there it is, all you be the ballers. I think we've covered everything. Next week, uh Carnival has directed us to come back with two very short uh podcasts on Monday and Tuesday next week. Essentially that will be updating the uh results and games for the competitions still behind closed doors. Obviously they're not all going to be revealed, but in an effort to save a little bit of time, uh they will be giving uh updates on rounds 45, 46, 47, uh or 44, 45, 46, I think it is.

SPEAKER_03

Yep, they're the ones, mate. You got a right five-week month.

SPEAKER_04

Yep, five-week block. So that will give some of our finalists in the Triple Bs and the punter of the year, etc., uh, a little bit of to chew on as they head to Adelaide. Anything else to say, boys, before we get there ourselves? We're only a day or two out now. No, I think it's been great. Thank you for listening, boys. Uh, we'll talk to you again early next week, and can't wait to have a beer with you fellas on tour.

SPEAKER_01

I'm excited, I got to see it. Can't wait to be hanging out with the Wranglers boys and all the other lads from the Beat the Ball, and I want to see how Hendo's Hall goes. I think that's gonna be magnificent.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, it should be a wonderful week as well. The weather's still not cum complying with what we'd like presently, but uh it may well be the last trip we do to Adelaide if the weather does not improve significantly. We're off to Cairns next year anyway, so uh, I'm already working on my tan for that.

SPEAKER_03

I can't wait for any of it, mate. I love it. It's great fun. And I want to see Lebar, and I want to see Little Lebar Daniel too, so I'll see you there, boys.

SPEAKER_04

Alright, everybody, that'll do for today. Back next week with a couple of very quick pods. Until then, we will see you on tour. Wherever you are, whatever you're doing, be the ball.

SPEAKER_05

Hey Gilmore, you suck, you duckass!

SPEAKER_00

Comes off until the lights go out, Jimmy give out, can't shut my mouth until the smoke clears out, and my eyes are out. I'm over this shit, in my bone, go out and do.