The Foureva Podcast
Welcome to The Foureva Podcast, where we break barriers and redefine success!
Join host Jamar Jones, a dynamic entrepreneur, national speaker, and author of "Change Your Circle, Change Your Life," as he takes you on an extraordinary journey of inspiration and motivation.
In each episode, we bring you an impressive lineup of star-studded guests, each with a unique voice and a wealth of insights to share. From industry leaders to renowned experts, we uncover their secrets to success in personal, business, and marketing domains. Prepare to be captivated by their stories, strategies, and experiences that will empower you to reach new heights.
Whether you're an aspiring entrepreneur, a marketing professional, or simply seeking fresh perspectives on life and business, The Foureva Podcast is your ultimate destination. Discover the transformative power of changing your circle and unlocking your full potential. With each episode, we delve into the minds of the most influential voices in the industry, providing you with the tools and inspiration you need to overcome obstacles and achieve greatness.
Don't miss out on this dynamic podcast that will fuel your ambition, challenge your limits, and propel you toward success. Tune in to The Foureva Podcast and join a community of driven individuals who are ready to make an impact. Get ready to be inspired, motivated, and 'foureva' transformed!
The Foureva Podcast
How to turn your connections into paying clients with the 3C strategy w/ Baily Hancock
Want to grow your business, deepen your network, and create real opportunities through authentic relationships? In this episode, Jamar Jones sits down with Professional Friend Maker and connection strategist Baily Hancock to dive deep into the power of relationships for business growth.
Baily shares how she built a thriving career—and multiple businesses—by mastering the art of authentic connection, strategic networking, and community building. She also explains her proven "Three C's" framework (Community, Connection, Collaboration) for creating opportunities and partnerships that fuel success.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
✅ How to build trust quickly and authentically without oversharing
✅ Why people are portals to opportunities (and how to connect meaningfully)
✅ How to curate a powerful community instead of just "networking"
✅ Ways to deepen relationships that lead to collaborations, clients, and speaking gigs
✅ How visibility and consistency attract business—even when you think no one is watching
✅ Practical ways to leverage your network for referrals, introductions, and long-term growth
Baily also shares her personal journey from being a behind-the-scenes connector to stepping into the spotlight with her new podcast Seeking the Overlap, and how she's using relationships to build her business, her brand, and her upcoming book.
🚀 If you’re an entrepreneur, founder, executive, or business owner ready to amplify your impact, this episode is packed with actionable insights.
🔔 Don’t forget to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and turn on notifications for more expert interviews about business growth, relationship building, leadership, and visibility!
My original job out of undergrad was as an event manager. I very much did that through workshop facilitation, seminars, conferences, Like I was the girl that everybody had to go through to. You know put on this event or this workshop or this seminar. So I was connected to all these different people. Then I moved into community management, I moved into business development and partnerships. Then I got into community strategy and I moved into business development and partnerships. Then I got into community strategy and then had my own businesses.
Speaker 2:What's going on, Bailey? How you doing.
Speaker 1:I'm so good, I'm so good, I'm so glad to be here, you feeling good, and how is it in California?
Speaker 2:right now. What's going on?
Speaker 1:Bailey, how you doing. I'm so good, I'm so good, I'm so glad to be here.
Speaker 2:You feeling good, and how is it in California right now? What's going on?
Speaker 1:It's a little hazy, a little gloomy October day, which I'm here for. I'm a fall girl and so I like a little spooky vibes in October. It feels right. I like a sweater in October because that also feels correct, not like this sweating thing. So yeah, I've got my tea. I like a sweater in October because that also feels correct, not like this sweating thing. So yeah, I've got my tea. I've got spooky vibes, I'm feeling good.
Speaker 2:Nice, nice. Yeah, that's amazing. Somebody said hey, prim, what's going on? So we're going to talk all about building relationships. You're nicknamed the professional friend maker. Why is that?
Speaker 1:It's the through line of everything I've ever done is connecting with others to achieve my goals, and so my original job out of undergrad was as an event manager. I very much did that through workshop facilitation, seminars, conferences. I was the girl that everybody had to go through to put on this event or this workshop or this seminar, so I was connected to all these different people. Then I moved into community management, I moved into business development and partnerships, then I got into community strategy and then had my own businesses. In between all of those and with every job, the professional friend maker component was the way in which I did things right. It was like all about the people I was collaborating with and supporting and amplifying and that's just how I've done it all.
Speaker 1:And the name came from when my nephew was four he's 14 now. He was like Aunt B, what do you do for a living? And I was like, well, how do I put this in kid terms? I guess I make friends for a living and I help them learn how to play together and it just stuck and it's like that is exactly what I do actually. And so through all of the changes in my bios over the years, through all of the title changes. Professional Friend Maker has been the means through which I achieved my goals and helped others do the same.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think powerful relationships and connections is always an amazing topic that I love to talk about, as I'm the change your circle, change your life guy, so I think that this is change your life guy, so I think that this is like right on topic of the stuff I like to talk about. So why in business is relationships so important?
Speaker 1:Because how else are you going to do a damn thing, right, like what are you going to do it all alone? I mean, sure, go ahead. It's going to take a lot longer and it's going to be less interesting and less enjoyable. So it doesn't really matter what you're doing. If you're a business owner, you need new customers, you need new clients, you need promotion, you need support, you need to hire people, you need to work with people. Like, yeah, you can do the thing you're great at, whatever that function is.
Speaker 1:But getting the word out, getting new people, establishing yourself as a credible expert in your space all relies upon other people lending credibility to you through the trust that they've built with their community. I mean, I love the change your circle thing because it's true, you know what they say about you are the result of the five people you spend the most time with, or whatever. That is right. It's like, yeah, you will rise to the occasion of the people that you're with or you'll drop to the people that you're with, and so, whether it's like an accountability group, a mastermind, or it's collaborating and doing marketing partnerships with well-aligned audiences, other people act as portals for you to get to wherever it is you're trying to go and do. Whatever it is you're trying to do and I don't mean this in a very selfish, self-centered way it's a reciprocal thing. You are a portal for others and others are a portal for you.
Speaker 2:Oh, I like that. I may steal that from you.
Speaker 1:People are portals.
Speaker 2:I will. I'll quote you, though. I'll quote you the portals. I think it's the first time I've heard about I mean there's a lot of different ways I've heard but portals, because look, so it's like a portal.
Speaker 1:Yes that's a freaking portal right there, right, and you know, I've got my tattoo oh my god the venn diagram.
Speaker 1:I think that would look really cool all lit up yeah, that's, that's my, that's my you know logo, my iconography, like my symbol for everything I do, because the basis of my work is, yes, people are portals, but how do you get through those doors or how do you even get them to open the portal? For you? It's through connecting. It's through finding the overlap on your Venn diagram with another person, right? So, like you and I have some very clear overlaps with our ways of thinking about being in business, and so that's what we initially connected on and what made us like each other and wanna know more and wanna do more. Right, it's like finding that overlap or that common whatever belief, value, ideas, upbringing, whatever that commonality is. You start from there and then you can expand portal, start to open, then you can walk through.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, that's good, that's good. So how do we build trust quickly?
Speaker 1:You have to allow people to see you, which can feel really vulnerable and uncomfortable. This is something that has come up a lot for me this year, because I by nature am sort of an overachieving, perfectionist, people-pleasing type and I have a tendency to kind of morph into the person that I think the person in front of me wants to talk to and know as a means to connect. And I've done that my whole life and there's a lot of beauty in that Like there's a lot of beauty in that Like there's a lot of beauty in being able to sort of morph or become a chameleon so that the other person feels safe with you, which is essentially, I think, what I was doing at the core. But there's a danger to it too, because if you're only presenting the personality of somebody that you think they want, they're not actually getting to know you at all. They're getting to see a version of you or a persona that isn't quite it, and so the connection is never fully made right. I think of it as like covering an electrical outlet with a piece of tape. It's like why won't this plug go in? Like something is a barrier here to getting in. The connection can't be made.
Speaker 1:So once I sort of realized that I was like, oh God, okay, I have to face potential rejection and show up as my most authentic self, which is arguably one of the most overused words in the world. But the way authentic is showing up for me now is telling the truth, like when I think, oh, authentic, shut up. Now. I'm like no, can you tell the truth about who you are and what you think? So the other person can say, yep, she's for me or not my person, but either way, rejection is just redirection, right. So if they are like you're not for me, you've just saved both of you a lot of time.
Speaker 1:So building trust, it's inherent when you can show up authentically, aka telling the truth about yourself and letting yourself be seen by somebody else. And it doesn't mean you have to vulnerability, vomit all over people, right, you don't have to tell your deep, dark secrets, but you do have to share something. And that can look like being like, if you're in a networking event, say, which nobody likes, even the extroverted among us saying like I'll be honest with you new person I just met. I don't love this kind of vibe, like I don't love the big, crowded conference breakout rooms for meeting people. It doesn't feel natural.
Speaker 1:How are you feeling right now? Like just leveling with somebody and saying honestly, like how you're showing up in that exact moment, that can be enough to immediately build a little bit of trust with somebody, because then they believe you and they're like okay, she's going to tell me that she's uncomfortable right now. What can I tell her that's going to show her that, like, I'm in this too with her. So a lot of it is being honest and being present in the moment with somebody else.
Speaker 2:And I think a lot of us try to put the cloak on, put the mask on, and say they try to like do the same rodeo dance right, instead of just being truthful. Um, and it's funny because oftentimes, like that line you just use, like hey, I'm gonna be honest. Like using even just that line with people immediately builds trust drops now you know, yeah, because now you know that like okay, you're getting the real answer.
Speaker 2:There's none of this. Like we're still trying to figure each other out. Like I'm right away from the get-go gonna say I'm gonna be honest, like this, I don't like doing this. You know, I, I don't really, I don't even know why I'm here, but I'm here and I'm talking to you. So let's make the best of this thing let's do it if we're here.
Speaker 1:here, we've gotten dressed, we've driven, we've parked, we've like gotten our ass out of the house, which is saying a lot. Now, because you don't have to, and even in virtual settings, I find that it's nice to set the tone Like, yeah, just so. You know, I'm kind of showing up a little off today because of X, Y and Z, or I'm in such a good mood because this thing just happened. So like, sorry if I'm a little giddy, Like it doesn't have to be negative, it can be positive too. If anything, that's even better, right. But I think just even using the phrase I'm going to be honest immediately gives the other person the permission to do the same.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's good. That's good. See see people. This is Good. See see people. This is uh, okay. Hold on. We got some comments in here but, but see, see, people we got, I mean like tactical ways that you can go ahead and use that line right away. Um, can you talk to us about? So you have this thing of the three C's, so can you talk a little bit about that and how the three C's can help us build a stronger network and also grow our business?
Speaker 1:The three C's are community, connection and collaboration and it's sort of this cyclical process. So I do something with my clients called three C strategy sessions, and what we're doing there is whatever your goal is, whether it's getting promotion for your business, selling a book, filling a course, whatever, it doesn't matter. Whatever your goal is, whether it's getting promotion for your business, selling a book, filling a course, whatever, it doesn't matter. Whatever your goal is, the 3C strategy helps you connect with the right people who are going to help you achieve that goal. So the first piece of it is curating a community Rather than networking. I like to call it curating a community because networking to me implies walking down the aisle of a grocery store and just sweeping everything in your cart right, just like sweeping it right in, like you know, it doesn't matter what you're getting in there, you don't necessarily want it or need it, but you've got a full cart full of stuff. Whereas curating your community is being selective. It's having a grocery list. It's going in saying I need, you know, six eggs, I need some avocados, I need whatever, and you're being intentional about what you're putting in your cart. And the way that translates to humans is I have a criteria for the kind of people I welcome into my world. They have to be generous, they have to be kind and they have to be curious period, because those are the kind of people I want to know and I want to be in community with. So that's not to say that I exclude people from my network if they don't fit that criteria. Linkedin's a good example of like. There's a lot of people in there that I can't say I've run through that criteria, but those to me that's like top of the funnel for potential people to add to my community. Once I get on a virtual coffee chat or an in-person meeting or a call with somebody, that's where I'm running that criteria and I'm like are you somebody that I want to take into the next level, to the inner circle? So curating your community implies being really intentional about who you're bringing into your world. So if I was trying to market something, I would think about OK, I would like people who have audiences similar to the one I'm trying to get my thing in front of. I also want people who are maybe doing something similar to me but not quite, and I also would love to bring in potential you know customers or clients from the jump so you can have a whole list of the type of people you want to connect with. But having that intentionality, when you're attending networking events or you're asking for introductions from people in your community or you're connecting with people on LinkedIn or wherever else, having that clarity is really important, because then you're not wasting your time and you're not just smashing, grabbing and putting everything in your cart. You're being really selective. So that is about bringing new people into your community. That's going to help you achieve this goal.
Speaker 1:The next C is connection, and it's catalyzing connection. So, once they're in your world, how are you deepening those relationships? How are you nurturing those new relationships? How are you watering and fertilizing the seeds that you just planted? Right and so? That looks like having intentional outreach and touch points with them. It's checking in when you don't need something. It's supporting their content online. It's featuring them in your channels as just a generous thing to do. It's giving before taking and it's making people feel like you give a damn and you're not just in it for you, right? So it's leading with value. It's leading with generosity. In it for you, right? So it's leading with value. It's leading with generosity. It's showing in, you know, a very organic, like natural interest in them. It's being curious in what they're doing and it's finding ways to help them right. So it's a lot of like this is where you're making deposits before you're trying to withdraw. So that's catalyzing connection.
Speaker 1:The third C is cultivating community. Sorry, cultivating collaboration. Collaboration in this sense is how are we helping each other here? What are we doing together to support one another? And this can look like making introductions, like asking for support from your network, right, asking for something that you want. If my goal is to sell a thing, I might ask my network for introductions to podcast hosts or to people who might interview me or other ways of getting in front of well-aligned audiences. So the key here with this one is not being afraid to ask for support, which a lot of people are, especially women. Not being afraid to be clear about what it is that you want.
Speaker 1:I have a little framework that I use, called the ABC framework, and it's ask for what you want, be clear and highlight your credibility. So it's like where are the links you can share with people so that they can refer people to you very easily? Where are the receipts that show that you're a good podcast guest, so that they're not worried that if they introduce you to somebody you're going to suck and you're going to sully their name Right. It's like here's what I want, here's specifically how you can help and here are all of the receipts to back up that I'm a credible person to recommend. So that's a little framework I use and it really just comes down to the fact that people inherently like supporting other people. They really do. It feels good to help other people. You have to make it easy for them to do it, otherwise it's just not going to happen, because people have good intentions and not a lot of time. So those are the three C's.
Speaker 2:You just dropped a lot of heat in there Just to summarize my whole business oh my goodness sakes, okay, whoa, where do I start?
Speaker 2:All right, holy crap. Okay, well, the framework that you have, the ABC framework, I think is incredible. People just don't think about this stuff. So, like the way on how I network. So we just did this amazing retreat in New York and it wasn't like your typical retreat, like when I put on an experience. It's very different and unique, but it's all built off of connections and relationships and everybody was asking me, like, how did you do this? Like, where did you find this place? How did you get connected with this person? Like they just kept because they got got. Basically everybody got to step into my world for a second and they're like how do you?
Speaker 2:do this because it wasn't like we were going in these hotels and traditional meetup places, like it was kind of like the mafia, you know, we were like in the back rooms of restaurants and, yeah, you know, like like we had a podcast studio out in Times Square. But the reason why I'm saying this is because that ABC framework is literally how I move connections and relationships to a next step, yes, like the next level, like literally that exact framework that you just laid out is exactly what I do to move the conversation and the relationship to the next step, and oftentimes people don't know how to do that strategically and build trust quickly. But you have to be willing to add value and they have to know why you are the person that they need to be connected to, to give a resource or give a referral or give an introduction to. They need to. They need to figure out quickly who you are, and so having those materials, links, like just to show that credibility is so, so, so important, um and that, and it's so simple. It's so simple too, like it's. It's very simple to do that Now.
Speaker 2:Obviously, now, as you're building that out for somebody, you got to learn a little bit more about their story, who they are, what they've done, all that type of stuff. But like, ask yourself, like that people I mean, what is the purple fire? St Nick was going on, man Ask yourself that the purple fire, ask yourself that, okay. So I got a question for you, bailey, so okay. So let's say, we're growing our relationships, right, we're growing our network. We're strategically doing this and we're doing it with an intention. How do we do that to get a sale? So, like, is there methods or ways that, once we do know somebody, is there ways to drive it to, and maybe not just a sale? I'm saying like, even, like you said, collaboration, a partnership, like, is there things extra that we should do, even after we've shown the credibility, we've gotten that resource, um, we've shown who we are, um, what's the next step to get an action to happen?
Speaker 1:I mean that's a great point, because once you put it in the hands of somebody in your network, there is a bit of like okay, hopefully this works out right. And I think this is where being really intentional about the kind of people you even get to that stage with comes in, because you want people that are good to their word. You want people that are going to do what they said they're going to do and that are going to show up equally as excited to support you as you are to work with them Right. So so much of my business and opportunities has come through second degree connections and I kind of like to play in that space a little bit more, because then it helps me maintain a level of I don't know security with my own connections. Like, I'm very rarely asking my first degree connections to pay me for something right, I'm asking them for introductions.
Speaker 1:Actually, I have another framework called the three eyes. It's info inspo and intros, so it's like that's usually what you can get from somebody information. So that's people saying, oh, have you read this book, have you listened to this podcast? Have you, you know, gone to this thing? Inspiration is like ideas and feedback and like, oh, I think that's really great, but what about this? And then, introductions are obviously introductions to people that can support you, so I like to maintain that level of connection with my people so that it enables them to then bring me the sale right and, look, this should be an addition to other marketing strategies, because that's what this is. It is definitely a marketing strategy, even if you're looking for promotional opportunities. It is one of those kinds of things, though that is a bit of a long game, and if you just think of it in terms of a garden, you're not walking out to your garden that you've never been to and trying to pick fruit that day.
Speaker 1:No you got to plant the seeds, you got to water them, you got to nurture them, you got to prune them, you got to like, take time to build this. And I will tell you this I had a call this morning with somebody that I've known through the internet for about six years now. She and I have never met in person. We've had two calls in that entire time and she's putting me on stage for an event that she's running next year and she's having me at the TEDx talk that she's putting on in a year from now, all because she's been watching.
Speaker 1:We've maintained a level of connection over the years. We've supported each other in a very passive but intentional way, and so I was talking with her about the fact that I never count on anything coming through, in the reason that I want to be pleasantly surprised because I have such faith in this long-term strategy of building a network and a community of human beings who something might come through right away, something might take a while. So that's why it's one piece. You still have to have that those paid ads and, like your traditional marketing strategies on top of this, but this one, especially for entrepreneurs that don't have big marketing budgets, this is such a good free free in the terms of you're not paying for anything, but not free in the terms of time and investment. This is such a good way to start to generate opportunities for yourself new clients, new exposure, all of the things that we know are so important as a business owner. But you do have to be a little bit patient with it and have some faith.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, that's very well said, very, very, very well said With that speaking gig. Congratulations, first of all Thank you With that speaking gig. You said they were watching for a while. What?
Speaker 1:are they?
Speaker 2:watching. Can you just let the audience know what content is it? Were you just podcast hopping Like? Talk to us about how, what were they watching?
Speaker 1:So part of this is being as visible as you can be. Right, it is showing up consistently, whether that's on your own channels or on other people's channels. I do both. I have a podcast called seeking the overlap. I have a digest that goes out once a month that's called the Three Cs Digest, and I'm on LinkedIn every day. Every day, monday through Friday, I'm posting something, some kind of content. I'm showing up on Instagram, I'm showing up on TikTok, and all of this is recycled content. Right, I'm not creating individual stuff for every platform. It's the same content put with a different lens depending on the platform and the audience. But she reached out a few months ago and we got on a call and I had no idea she was watching because we, I think, often forget there are a lot of lurkers. Maybe they're loving lurkers they're loving lurkers.
Speaker 1:They want what's best for you, but they're not always going to throw a like your way. They're not always going to comment, but they're loving workers. They're loving workers. They want what's best for you, but they're not always going to throw a like your way. They're not always going to comment, but they're watching and they're paying attention, and they can't do that if you're invisible. They can't do that if you're hunkering down and you know, sitting in your home office or wherever you are and not putting anything out.
Speaker 1:So a lot of this depends upon you being consistent and also brave enough to show up, even before you're maybe a hundred percent ready or before you feel like you've got it all figured out. Because I'll tell you what, going back to connection, connection happens in the messy, imperfect person-ness of you. People like you more when they think you don't have it all figured out right. Like you can have aspirational follows that you do where you're like oh, one day, obviously we've all got Oprah right. It's like well, one day we'd love to be Oprah. But like you don't relate to Oprah right. Like you relate to your fellow entrepreneurs that are kind of in the shit with you. Where you're like okay, you're maybe like a year or two ahead of me. I like that. I like that because I can look and see what might be around the corner for me.
Speaker 1:So I say this because, as a recovering perfectionist overachiever, my instinct has always been do not press post until it's perfect. But that takes up a lot of time. You're missing eyeballs and your perfect might be somebody else's like way over right, like you're, 50% might be somebody's perfect. So you just have to remember that. Like showing up at all, I think, is better than hesitating. I'm a guest on podcasts, like I mean, I've done 26 this year alone, and so that's a huge part of my strategy is getting in front of well-aligned audiences, who maybe 1% of those listeners are my people and I'll take it Right. So it's a combo. It's being visible so that people that are lovingly lurking can have something to pay attention to have something to pay attention to, lovingly lurking.
Speaker 2:That's funny, because there's a lot of lurkers. We had a podcast earlier today and she has a good LinkedIn following Amy from Wolf Social Marketing and she literally was saying, like, most of her clients are all people that are actually not directly connected with her on LinkedIn and they shoot her a message or they go on her website and then say, hey, I've been following you a long time on LinkedIn and that's how it happens. Yeah, it's crazy that the people that are not the most active are the ones that are actually the clients, the people that are interested in the services. So it really goes to show you that you have to constantly show up. You know, and you just never know who's watching. You know, even if you get discouraged or you feel like, oh man, this is not really working, I'm not really getting a lot of engagement, or like it's the same couple of people that keep, they ain't going to nothing. You know, but somebody's probably watching you, but they, they, they just got the binoculars exactly.
Speaker 1:And then, the moment they're ready, they reach out and you're like, yeah, what you? This happened another time earlier this year. I had somebody reach out who I haven't heard from in a decade, saying hey, can I hire you to do a six week workshop series on growing a network for my real estate agent team. And I was like, oh yeah, you can, we can talk about that, and she's never liked a single thing I've posted. I've never seen her name pop up in my analytics, and so it's like, okay, all right, I guess.
Speaker 1:I'll just have faith that this is working and the right people will see it. But this is why having a presence online really does matter. The other thing, too, you need to remember is that somebody might find you today and go binge all of your posts. Yes, yes, listen to all of your podcast episodes. So, like I get discouraged a lot, a lot, a lot, because I like to see metrics, I like to see ROI, and unfortunately it's not always there to see. So there is a level of faith you have to have, just like with the relationships, right, it's like you have to have faith that the right ones will come through for you. You have to have faith that the right opportunities and the right clients will come to you in the moment they're supposed to, and not a moment sooner, unfortunately.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, this is awesome. So talk to me a little bit and then we're going to get into some of the speaking and your podcast and everything. Okay, so who's your ideal client People that you like to work with? Because I'm listening Anybody watching this right now and listening is going to learn a ton from this, by the way, like the, the, the networking, the relationship building, um, how to stand out, um, you know how to acquire clients from just showing up. Growing an online audience Like this is all the stuff I love and I preach, all all day, all day long. But for you particularly, I just want to know, like, as people are listening to this, who's the best person that you would like to work with and then, what is, like, the result that you give them? So, let's say, they learn all these amazing things, what's the result that they get, the outcome?
Speaker 1:I love working with founders because they tend to be me the overachieving. I'll do it all myself. I don't need nobody. I've been burned in the past.
Speaker 1:I'm just going to start my own thing because I don't like listening to you know like I know her, I know him, I am them, and so why I have such a soft spot for founders is a couple reasons. One I know how lonely and isolating it can feel when you are trying to do it all all by yourself. How lonely and isolating it can feel when you are trying to do it all all by yourself, even if you hire people. There is a level of, I think, professionalism or detachment that I think most founders feel like they have to have with their employees or their team, because they need to look like they know what they're doing, they've got it all handled right. So even if you're an executive leader at a company, if you're somebody that other people are looking towards to make decisions and keep things afloat, there is that feeling of needing to put up that persona of I've got it all handled, don't worry, right, and so that's kind of a different piece of the puzzle. But that mindset is one that I love to work with, because those people are ripe for receiving support, but there's often this hesitancy to welcome and ask for support right. So it's that place where they know that they would like either support from an emotional perspective, but also in a growth perspective for their business, whether they run the company or they're a leader in a company, there is obviously such a need for external amplification of whatever it is you're trying to do right. So another piece of why I like working with founders and executive leaders is they often have a great story to tell and they know a lot about what it is that they're doing Right.
Speaker 1:So one of my workshops is called um amplify your influence and it's effectively teaching people how to use what I call connection centered thought leadership to amplify their influence. And that looks like educating people on something connecting with them so they trust you and they like you, and then inspiring them to take some kind of action. And those three pieces are what make up the framework. And when you're a founder or an executive leader, the education piece is usually pretty clear. That's easy, right? That's your expertise. The connection piece is where a lot of them are like oh, I don't know about that part, but we know that the connection happens when you can be a little bit more honest and you can share the low points of your career. You can share the stickier stuff and you can also just level with people on a human to human basis. That's what makes people want to follow you. That's what makes people want to cheer you on and see you succeed and buy your thing and download your product and blah blah, blah, blah blah.
Speaker 1:So, I love working with those types of people because they need the support the most. They've likely been burned in the past and they don't know how to like let that guard down to ask for and receive support. And that's where the 3C strategy really comes into play, cause it's like okay, you're trying to do X, let's find you communities that you can be a member of, to feel both supported, to find new opportunities and to potentially give back to others. Right Like? There's a lot of different things that come with the community piece. The connection piece is how do you let your guard down enough to actually connect human to human with somebody else, be it from a stage or one-on-one. And then the collaboration piece is where the stuff really happens. It's like OK, now, you got to ask for it and you got to receive it. So founders and executive leaders are exactly right for this kind of vibe and this kind of work, because they need it. They have the best frickin stories. They get shit done.
Speaker 1:It's a little bit of amplification they can achieve so much more and have such a greater influence and impact in their lives and their career.
Speaker 2:Wow, wow, so this is awesome. So you just launched your podcast. I did Right. And how many episodes are you in? We're six episodes in, okay, okay, cool. So I don't know exactly when this episode is going to drop, but you may have more episodes, so let's just let everybody know.
Speaker 1:Every Sunday we drop a new one.
Speaker 2:Every Sunday, and why did you feel like it was important for you to launch your podcast?
Speaker 1:This is the third podcast that I have hosted and produced and I wasn't sure, coming back into entrepreneurship late last year, if I was going to do another one, because I don't like to do anything that doesn't serve a purpose because who has the time? And so it was. It was around May of 2024 when I was like I really miss getting to lead the conversation because, like I said, I'm on a lot of podcasts as a guest and I love being a guest because it for a lot of reasons, but being a host lets me ask the questions I want answers to and it allows people also to learn alongside of me. And my podcast is called Seeking the Overlap and the idea is we're creating a more connected world, one conversation at a time, and when I initially set out to create it, I thought this season and the show in general was going to be about teaching people how to connect with others, to feel less alone, to have more support all the great things that come from connection.
Speaker 1:What I did not anticipate and what has played out thus far is there's a massive piece that one has to do before they can connect with others, which is connection with self, and that took me by surprise. So I'm having all these conversations with authors and thought leaders and experts in connection, realizing that I had been putting up all these barriers to connection my entire life by being a perfectionist and people pleasing and morphing into who I thought they wanted to be, like I talked about earlier. And so I added a ton of interviews to play at the start of the season that go in real, in depth on connection with self and like what the hell does that even mean and how does one do it. And it's very selfish. I'm like tell me how to do this.
Speaker 1:Can somebody just give me some answers, and if other people want to listen to that's cool.
Speaker 1:And it's really been this amazing catalyst in my own personal growth and evolution and business growth and evolution, because I'm realizing so much of what I thought was protecting me in the past and keeping me safe from rejection was the exact reason I was never feeling fully connected with anybody because I wasn't giving them the whole me. So now I feel very grateful. I just turned 40 and I feel like, well, thank God I figured this out now and I didn't waste another 40 years not doing the thing the right way. So this podcast has become a real time, almost therapy for me and a deeper exploration into the components of connection that I had no idea I was missing. And for somebody that calls herself a professional filmmaker, it's a little embarrassing. It's a little like, oh geez, here I've been out here telling people what to do, not following the correct advice, and I love that. I love that I can showcase like oh guys, hey, fyi, I do have a lot of this right, but I was missing a lot of it too.
Speaker 1:Come along if you want to join the ride with me and hopefully we all feel a little bit more able to connect on a deeper level with ourselves and others.
Speaker 2:By the end of it, yeah, that's, that's real. That's real, just like, and I think so. I call that your self-awareness, and I go all around the country helping people unlock their self-awareness and it's, it's something, it's a journey that we're all on Like, I mean, even myself. I do all that work, but I'm always discovering things about myself where I'm like okay, let me go deeper on that. And it's funny that you said about the podcast, because, like, when I have guests on my podcast like this, I'm selfishly also asking questions. I'm taking this prime opportunity.
Speaker 1:You get an hour of somebody's time for free, like what Of?
Speaker 2:course. Yeah, I'm asking questions. I mean, some of it is for the audience and then some of it's for me, win-win.
Speaker 1:Okay, it's a win-win.
Speaker 2:It's a win-win. No, that's awesome. And then, and what? What do you think that this podcast is also going to do for for your business as well, cause I know that you don't just do it just to have conversations. So what do you think it's also going to do for your business?
Speaker 1:I mean, it's another opportunity for visibility, it's another opportunity for credibility. It's an opportunity for me to have hour-long conversations with people I want to know more about Because, like I said, the bulk of my interviewees for this season are authors who've written books in or around the connection, relationship, friendship space. I'm writing a book proposal right now for a book on seeking the overlap, and now I have a bunch of people who have agents and publishers in the exact category I want to be in, so it serves a lot of purposes. It's also content. I mean, lord knows, talking about being visible.
Speaker 1:I get so much juice for the squeeze with my podcast episodes that's like I want that on my tombstone. She got the most juice for the squeeze out of life Because it's like if you're going to do something, do it as well-rounded as possible, so you get the most from that one opportunity. So I've got like four to five posts every week. I've got content for TikTok and Instagram reels. I've got newsletter fodder. I've got all of these pieces from one one hour interview and that's not nothing right. So even if nobody listens to the podcast which obviously I hope they do I actually listened. I never used to listen to my podcast because I was there for the recording. But I listen now as an audience member and I'm like, ooh, that host made a good point.
Speaker 2:A really good point.
Speaker 1:Wow, that's really insightful, she's good. She's pretty good. Somebody should give her an award or something. So you know, it serves a lot of purposes and it does take a lot of time, but it's also literally helping me write this book. Like the book is called Seeking the Overlap, connecting Deeply in a Deeply Disconnected World, and my episodes are also interviews for the book.
Speaker 1:So I'm getting all the juice for the squeeze that I can out of it and truly like, even if nothing else. It is changing my life because I'm learning so much about something I thought I knew everything about.
Speaker 2:It's humbling and that's good.
Speaker 1:It's good to be humbled.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, that's. That's awesome that we just had. I just had. Did I connect you with Kimberly Spencer? Yet I don't think so. I think I talked to you about her last time. You just reminded me, because when you're talking about so, she literally just dropped her book and it's called how to make every podcast, want you. She took pieces from the podcast and then put it into the book and then she kind of filled it around it and then we and she just released it like a week, a week or two before our retreat, and then we got to feature her book alongside a couple others on the billboard in Times Square, which was just like epic. And she's got this and she's pregnant too right now.
Speaker 2:And she's got this picture of her like this and it's like you can see the little bump. It's just like the cutest thing.
Speaker 1:That's so cool, but she's like a ball of energy.
Speaker 2:But it reminded me of like, yeah, taking the podcast and then putting into the book, because you're grabbing stories and then you can even just share more context around it. Like it's such a great way to write a book.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's so much less isolating.
Speaker 1:It's like you're yeah, you're just like in a dark corner, like no, I'm the kind of person that needs other people to generate ideas like. I very much get ideas through my conversations and connections with other humans. If I'm just alone in my office all the time, it not that there's any, it's not that it's not coming, it's just not as relevant to me and it's not as alive Like my ideas that I get through conversation feel so much more of the moment because they're coming through other people, which tells me other people are thinking about these things and there's some kind of validation in that too.
Speaker 2:For sure, yeah, yeah, oh, my God, it's just. This is so good. I just love. I just love what you're about. It's like it's just so refreshing. It's refreshing to talk to somebody that gets it Like I. Um, it just understands the power of a network, um knows how to move around a room, um grow relationships quickly. And then the way also that you're using it like for podcast guesting, I mean I would also think of like business development, it's probably really big. Do you do a lot of business development trainings or have you been?
Speaker 1:asked To me it's all kind of in the same vein, yeah yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1:Having a network. Regardless of your intention, it's all the same mechanics. I mean, like I the real estate agent thing is a good example of that, where it's like a lot of her agents were younger, they're in their twenties. They don't really have a robust network. So who are you selling to and whose houses are you selling? Like it's teaching people the fundamentals of meeting other humans and then finding a way to thoughtfully and symbiotically leverage those relationships in a way that's not going to piss a bunch of people off and you're not going to be hitting up your Facebook crew for all of your sales, right? Like people get real sick of that real fast. So, yeah, it's applicable to anybody that needs human beings to do their job, which, frankly, is pretty much almost everybody.
Speaker 2:It's almost everybody yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:No, that's, that's awesome. So, so what? So let's say that we built a relationship. This is one last question I want to ask you. So we built our relationship now, helped us be able to actually have a I hate the word transaction, but like be able to convert the person to either, you know, collaborate, partnership, advocates, sponsor what you're doing become a client or a customer all the different ways of of basically adding value to somebody else. How do we then blow it up some more? So like, now they've already we've got somebody to know, like and trust us. We built this relationship and there's some connection, there's that overlap, right, that happened. Now, how do we have the ripple effect? So I kind of want to hear what your strategy is when it comes down to asking them for, you know, referrals or other intros, or ripple, like, basically spreading out what they were able to do in that relationship, and how do you get more of it?
Speaker 1:I think of it as if we go to collaboration specifically. So my first business six years ago was as a collaboration consultant and I worked primarily with service-based entrepreneurs to help them grow their business with partnerships, and the way that I would always explain it was you got to do a lot of test and learns, test and learn, test and learn. And the same is true for collaboration with individuals and like we're talking about here. Let's say it's a referral situation. Let's even say it's me and you. We meet, we have overlap, we like each other. What happens is you continuously create new opportunities to connect with that person. So I have a bunch of people I've met this year who we have like a standing quarterly call where we check in with each other. We may check in in between as well if something comes up and we could use some short-term support, but what we're usually doing is something small together. So whether that's, you know, being on a podcast, I don't think is small. I think that's like a medium to high thing, depending on the show, right, but let's say it's being included in their newsletter.
Speaker 1:You're launching something and somebody has a decent newsletter and they're like I'd love to promote you in it. You get put in there. You make sure you have a way to measure ROI, right? So you're trying to track that. Like, is it a discount code you gave them so that you can say everybody that used this code came from this opportunity, whatever it is. Then you see how that goes. You see if their audience liked what you had to say. Then you see how that goes. You see if their audience liked what you had to say. You see if, like, you got more than a handful of people to opt into your thing and then you go back and say, hey, do you want to, like, co-produce something together this time? Like, do you want to do a fireside chat together? We could go live on LinkedIn or we could do whatever. Like, whatever that next step is.
Speaker 1:Look, it's not that dissimilar to dating. Okay, it's a lot of like, let's go for coffee. If we like each other, we can go to lunch and then we can go to dinner and if that goes well, maybe we do something a little longer term, right? So you just sort of build up to it and look, not everybody is going to be somebody you want to go on a second date with, and that doesn't mean you have to get rid of them from your community Doesn't mean it's a flop. It just means it wasn't the right aligned opportunity at the time. So you just baby step your way into it and you also have to make sure that it doesn't feel one-sided, right. Are you showing up for them, are you supporting them in the best way for them as possible? And so it is a lot of like relationship building through the whole process.
Speaker 1:You know, I said the three C's are like cyclical. It's not a line, it's not a straight line from community all the way to collaboration. It is a cycle because when you collaborate you also get the opportunity to add more people to your community, because you get exposure and then you got to connect with those people and even with the people you're collaborating with. You have to maintain that relationship because that's when people get a little bit like I don't like. That is when they feel used, right, they feel like you got what you came for and then you dropped off the face, yeah.
Speaker 2:And you bounce.
Speaker 1:That sucks, and it's happened to me. I'm sure it's happened to you.
Speaker 1:And that is people are going to people. Right, people are going to people. It's okay, that's part of the game. But I think, as long as you're showing up generously and organically and authentically and all of those right and you're being honest and transparent with the people you're collaborating with and giving honest feedback, right, like hey, I really felt like that went really well. Like, thank you so much for that introduction to so-and-so. They are an ideal client. If you know anybody else like them, please send them my way. I will give you 10% of whatever you know they sign up for with me.
Speaker 1:Like, put a little skin in the game, make it worth their while, but I'll tell you, not everybody's going to want, you know, a kickback Like some people want other things, and I think that's another really important piece to this is figuring out what is appealing to them as a payment. Whether it's reciprocated promotion or it's actual dollars, it doesn't matter. You got to find out what's important to them and then meet them where they are so that everybody feels like it's an even value exchange.
Speaker 2:So good. I mean that's um, it's, it's so good, it's so good. I mean that's um, it's, it's so good. It's so good because, like that's the, that's the key to moving forward any, any relationship or connection is figuring out what's valuable to them.
Speaker 1:Yeah, don't make assumptions?
Speaker 2:yeah, don't make assumptions. I mean, you can have a couple tried and trues of like sparking ideas or something like that, but finding out was valuable to them. I got um a good friend of mine, uh, and I have him in my book. He's um, he goes by dj payday, and I met him almost nearly 10 years ago when I started my business, and I met him through twitter and, um, he, till this day, wants nothing. It's like every once in a while, you meet an individual that just wants nothing and they just want to see you win. Yeah, and he literally is that to me. He's given me so many intros, connections, opportunities, especially in the beginning of the business when I was just getting things going, and he gave me so much and I just kept asking, like dude, like let me do something for you bro Like please.
Speaker 1:Yeah right, Because we're so not used to that.
Speaker 2:I'm like, please, man, like, and then you know. And then one day I just like dude, like why, why do you do this? He said I just want to see, like when I see something special, I just want to see it win.
Speaker 1:And I'll tell you why. Somebody probably did it for him right. Like this is the thing that we've also have to remember. Yes, reciprocation is so important, leading with value, all of that, everything we've been talking about. And it's not always a one-to-one thing. Sometimes you're going to have benevolent people like that that show up in your life and they feel like I told this woman on the call today I was like my fairy godmother strikes again. Like you came out of nowhere and just threw two speaking gigs at me Like what, what?
Speaker 1:did I do for you. And she's like I just appreciate what you're doing in the world and I want to see you succeed. And I'm like he's like I just appreciate what you're doing in the world and I want to see you succeed. And I'm like, okay, and to me that gives me like capital that I can then spend on somebody else Right, like it doesn't have to be one-to-one, it's kind of I call it relationship karma, it's it is. It's like do you want to others pass it on? Be a mentor, open doors for people because it does come back around. It does be a mentor. Open doors for people because it does come back around. It really does. You're a good person in the world. You lead with integrity. You genuinely show up and support others. People want to be in support of you too. So I guarantee you that person has either had doors open for him that he feels grateful for and wants to pass it on right.
Speaker 2:Just pay it forward, that's all you can do and I continue to. Honestly, I take cause it really people like that. That just touches me in a certain way, where I'm just like, okay, I got to. I see other situations where I'm like, okay, I got to, I got to help this person. Or even even this past event like we featured. I think it was like three or four people like that on the billboard that they were like why? And I said because I believe in what you're doing and you, and also it was less about me, it was more about them because they needed to see, they need to see themselves there, yeah, and and when they saw it and they're like, oh my God, maybe I am onto something, maybe I am like it's like I hate when people need validation, but to a certain degree, everybody needs some type of, some form of validation.
Speaker 1:If you don't need validation, you're probably a psychopath or an egomaniac. There's confidence and then there's whatever. That is Right right, right, right.
Speaker 2:It's social proof. It's social proof and to say, hey, I'm on the right path. Yeah, and just to give you that extra confidence and that boost that you're going in the right direction. So, yeah, just paying that forward is so incredible. This has been an awesome conversation. Where can people connect with you?
Speaker 1:How can they find you Best place to go to is seekingtheoverlapcom, because that'll get you to my website and all my handles are at the bottom of the page. But I love connecting with people on LinkedIn. So if you're on LinkedIn, come and find me, send me a DM, say you heard me on this podcast. That's also my way to track who's paying attention, who's coming to my world, right? It's like I was on a podcast yesterday and I got five connection requests within like a couple hours of it airing and I'm like okay, see, this is why I do it and it just it's beneficial to everybody, right? So go to seeking the overlapcom and then, please, if you are on LinkedIn which everybody should be, cause you know it's where the grownups are connected with me there and tell me you heard me on this podcast and we'll see where it goes. But thank you for having me. This has been so fun. I appreciate it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, this is awesome. If you're listening, you're watching. Please like comment. Subscribe to the podcast If you haven't already. Please share this with somebody. Don't be selfish. Share this out with somebody. Get this over to somebody that needs to hear this information, which is pretty much everybody, uh, that needs to, that needs to hear it, but definitely founders and executives and entrepreneurs alike that need to hear this information. And don't forget to uh connect with Bailey as well. I mean everybody's reachable that I have on this podcast. You need to go, reach out and connect with them, and don't forget to change your circle. You can change your life. So thank you so much for being on this podcast and we'll catch you on the next one. Peace. Don't forget to like, comment and subscribe, and don't forget to hit that notification bell for more amazing content that we're going to be putting out. And don't forget you can change your circle to change your life. Thank you.
