Listen Linda! Hosted by Jacquiline Cox
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Listen Linda! Hosted by Jacquiline Cox
Fe Davis Takes Us Inside Her Alabaster Heart
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Your heart can be breaking and still be holy. We sit with poet and author Fe Davis as she opens up about Alabaster Heart, a faith-based poetry book born from real journal entries, real heartbreak, and a real decision to let God use the story instead of burying it.
We talk about the meaning behind “alabaster” and why pouring out your alabaster heart is a sacred offering, not a public performance. Fe gets honest about writing while still hurting, the fear of feeling exposed, and the wisdom it takes to share your truth while protecting your privacy. Along the way, we dig into Christian healing as a process: surviving vs healing, moving from fight-or-flight to peace, learning forgiveness without pretending it didn’t hurt, and trusting God when the situation doesn’t match the promise.
We also go practical with boundaries and discernment: outgrowing people, praying at a distance, setting cutoff times, and recognizing when community helps and when isolation is doing its quiet work. If you’ve been navigating a situationship, grief, betrayal, co-parenting stress, church hurt, or you’re simply tired of “smiling through it,” this conversation offers language, hope, and next steps.
Listen, then share it with someone who needs it, and if the message lands, subscribe, leave a review, and tell us what line or takeaway stayed with you.
Welcome And What We’re Holding
SPEAKER_04Hey y'all. Welcome back to the Listen Linda Book Club Live, where real conversations meet real healing, and purpose always has a voice. Now I am your host, Dr. Jaclyn Cox, and today, listen, this one right here is the one is for the ones who have never had to smile through heartbreak, pray through pain, and keep showing up when life tried to sit you down. We're talking about a book that does not just sit pretty on your shelf, it speaks to your spirit. Alabaster Heart by my girl Fee Davis is a raw, faith-filled collection of reflections and poetry that takes brokenness and turns it into something sacred. And today we have the voice behind those pages joining us. Fee Davis, welcome to the show, girlfriend. Thank you. Now before you're welcome. Before we get in deep, because I already know who we are. Let's start here. Fee. Who were you before you became the author of Alabaster Heart? And who are you becoming now?
SPEAKER_00Well, before the book, a child of God, imperfect, and I'm becoming the woman of God that God wants me to be. It's just step by step, day by day. Amen.
Opening Prayer For Healing
Why She Released The Journal
SPEAKER_04Amen. And before we move any further, y'all know how I do when I do what I do. We have to open up in prayer. So bow my head. We're gonna open up in prayer, and then we're gonna get back with Fee Davis. Father God, we thank you for this moment, this platform, and this conversation. Father God, we invite you into this space, not just to be present, but to move. Touch every listener under the sound of our voice. Meet them in the places they don't talk about. Heal what's hidden, restore what's broken, and remind them that they are still worthy, still chosen, and still loved. And God, as we speak today, let every word be led by you, not ego, not performance, but purpose. In Jesus' mighty name. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. Now, about the book. What inspired Alabaster Heart? Was there a specific moment or season that pushed you to release this?
SPEAKER_00Yes. Um each of the poems is based off a real life event, either a a person or a place. So I would say what led me to just release all my journal writings was the last season I was in. I was in a situation ship, I guess you can say. And God got me out of it and told me to use it as a, I guess, a voice or a pathway for people who are still navigating through that. So I just said, okay, God, I can I can put some of them out there, but I put all of them together so it can be cohesive and God did the rest.
SPEAKER_04Now, why the name Alabaster Heart? What does that symbolize for you personally?
SPEAKER_00That's a good question. Um, remember the story of Mary in the Bible? God took me back to that, like the alabaster jar. She she didn't she broke it and poured it at you know the Lord's feet. So I felt like if someone has an alabaster heart and is full, you can pour it out to God. And it's the same sacred offering to him. It's like your sacrifice, it says like your tears in the Bible. God counts all your tears. So I thought of that like, oh, how about someone has a heart to give to God, not per se a jar or a box or a box, you know.
SPEAKER_04So you know, because when I first read your title, I'm a big CC Winance fan. Like, if anybody knows me, know I am a huge CC Winance fan, just like I'm a huge Houston fan. So when I heard Alabaster Heart, it reminded me of Alabaster Box, yeah. And when I read your book, I was like, ooh, this, like this would have been that would be a good soundtrack for this book because the way that she speaks on certain things in this song, you hit it on the head. Like y'all, if y'all have not gotten this, if you are, even if you are not a fan of poetry, um, the way that these are not like uh Sesame Street rhyme poetry. Like, she really gets deep, she is really great. Um, it really I'm gonna read y'all some of the ones that I really like um in a moment, but we're gonna we're gonna get to more about um the purpose of the book. Um, was this book written from healing or while you were still hurting?
SPEAKER_00Let me tell you something. Not it wasn't a place of healing just yet, it was like in the process. So, you know, with the journaling, with the journaling, that was like a healing process because I was able to reflect. So I didn't arrive and say, Oh, I'm gonna write a book. It was like in the process, yeah. So that's one thing about God, he's about processes, he don't waste pain.
SPEAKER_04That's right. He will he and he will turn it for your good. Yes, and he really did with this book. This was a phenomenal book. I am thank you. Anyone who knows me, my first love is poetry. I started writing when I started writing, I started writing poetry. That's why I'm so that's why I'm so lenient with my poetry people. Yeah, like I'm very lenient with y'all because I love y'all so much. Um, but this book really like I love poetry, and I think this is probably one of the best poetry books that I have bought in the last maybe three or four years. Like, this is a really good book. It really is, it really is. Wow. Um, the words in the book, you know. Um, and you did the cover yourself. I did actually. Look at this. Isn't this beautiful? Like, y'all better hit her up. She knows what she's doing. This is beautiful, absolutely gorgeous. Thank you. Absolutely. You did a phenomenal job. Phenomenal job.
SPEAKER_00Thank you. Um, thank God.
Fear Of Exposure And Privacy Tips
SPEAKER_04Girl, you are talented. You are really talented. What was the hardest truth you had to face while writing this book?
SPEAKER_00I guess the hardest for me was would I make it to the other side? You know, like when you're in a process and you're going through something like that, it's like, I don't feel like I can make it through it. So it was like the promise. You're remembering what God told you, but it's like the situation's not matching the promise. So it's like, God, how are we gonna go about that? So I guess my faith, you know, believing, trusting God, waiting. So it was like a lot of character development and refinement in the fire. Yeah, you know, in the fire, so it's just like God, I'm getting scorched here. And it's like, okay, you know, yeah, you gotta turn it up a little bit because that's how diamonds, you know, become a diamond, that hot heat. You know what I mean? So God will put you through that high heat to be not shine for you, but to shine for him.
SPEAKER_04Amen. Another question I'm gonna ask you before we take a break and and and take a little musical break, because I do little musical breaks. Um, did you ever feel exposed or afraid to share certain parts of your story?
SPEAKER_00Oh yes.
SPEAKER_04You know I'm asking because I read it.
SPEAKER_00Like, I think you could cover me, right? Because if you want me to do this, you got because I was actually going through stuff with you know, co-parenting and everything, and I was like, Lord Jesus, I don't want this to be used in court. So I said, So God made me wait, and then the time of it being released, um, it's like perfect timing because everything got finalized. I was like, okay, God, I see what you're doing. So yes, I was scared because I was like, if I did it too early, then you know, I don't know how the outcome would have been.
SPEAKER_04So well, I will let you know this. Your story is your story, and nobody can tell you what you felt. You're telling your truth, and as long as you don't mention names, which you did not, I did not. Um put that privacy clause in there, I did. Um, you will be totally fine. That is a uh publishing tip 101. Somebody don't want their name in your book, give them a nickname, even if it's a nickname, as long as it's not on their birth certificate, and you put that privacy clause in the beginning, you are a-okay, you are covered, amen. Tell your story, don't be scared because you scared because nine times out of ten, I will tell you this too feet, and I will tell all my listeners nine times out of ten, the people you are exposing will never buy a book, let alone yours. They don't read, they're not gonna open the book and read it because they ain't gonna want to buy it, okay? So I have exposed so many people, and they and it's been so many years later, and they ain't never said nothing to me. Go out because they ain't never opened it to read it to be open. Yeah, that's true. So you gotta think about the audience that you're afraid of, right? You gotta think about your audience. Have I ever seen this person purchase a book? Right if you haven't, you okay? Yeah, I'm good.
SPEAKER_00I'm good.
Musical Break And Reset
SPEAKER_04Janice said, So true. And Dr. Audrey Ann said, hello, Dr. Jacqueline Cox and Miss Fee Davis. Hello, hello, hello. We are going on one musical break. Uh, we will listen to, let's see what I want to play. We will listen to um we're gonna listen to listen, Linda. We're gonna take a three-minute 33-second break, and we will be back with Fee Davis and my favorite, one of my favorite books right now, Alabaster Heart. Right back.
SPEAKER_03We've been wanting to try to pull it all together.
Healing Versus Surviving In Real Life
SPEAKER_04From my debut album, Listen Linda, which you can find streaming on all music platforms worldwide. We are back with my girl, Fee Davis, and we are talking about her book and her journey of writing her book, Alabasta Heart. Now, we're gonna get back to the questions. How do you know when you're truly healing versus just surviving?
SPEAKER_00That's a good question. Um from a biblical perspective, I will say when it no longer affects you emotionally. You know how um Jesus told Peter to forgive somebody 77 times seven. I don't know if it's verbatim or is it parable, but when you can look at an individual and it's just no no reaction, it's just like God bless you, I pray for you, type of thing. When you're surviving, it's more like you're living off adrenaline, you're living off your emotions, you're on fight and flight. But when you're at peace, because the Bible says like God will make your make your enemies at peace with you, that's when you have arrived to the healing process. Amen. But it starts with the heart, you know, it starts like, okay, God, um, gotta help me. It's like an onion, you're just peeling the layers. So you're no longer living based off emotion, you're living based off faith, you know, peace, hope. Just like the fruits of the spirit type of thing. I've noticed. So, but everyone is different. Yeah. I know for me, it was like, okay, when I look at this individual, it's like, have you not regurgitated? No, yeah. It's just ill attempt. You know, it's like I don't even want to hear the name. Right. I was like, oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, okay. Okay. Oh, God bless them.
SPEAKER_04At the end of the day, they got it. Amen. Yes. I I I I I second that. Um, I haven't really had that dealing with that same type of relationship, but in more so of a workspace or friendship space. Um, I know right now I'm in that healing process because I could see that person. I could see a picture of that person, I could hear their name, and nothing happens. But for who, baby? You know me, so you can imagine. But yes, I have my husband told me, just just it, just you, just, just shut your mouth, just put your hand over if you feel like you're gonna speak something because because those words will come back. And I had to learn, like, you know what, everything that my mind says, I don't have to speak because it blocks my blessings when I do that. I have to know that if you if you say that you believe in God and and you say that he's gonna fix everything, you have to truly believe that because you're not believing it if you're still going backward and forth with the person. You feel like you gotta get that get back, you feel like you gotta kick right. You're not leaving God to fight it. So he'll tell you, okay, you let everybody else do it. Okay, you gonna think you got it? Okay, I'm gonna step back, I'm gonna let you figure it out.
SPEAKER_01Right.
Where God Meets Us In Pain
SPEAKER_04So, but when you finally say, you know what, God, I'm just tired. I'm just gonna leave this to you, and I'm just gonna focus on what you told me to do. Everything starts to align the way that it's supposed to. So I'm glad that you found you know true healing in this because when I say you bled on these pages, baby, you gave me something to read, hon. I got so many questions besides the ones that I got for this show. Uh I got some other questions we're gonna talk about off the air. Um, but moving into faith and identity, um, I want to ask you, where did God meet you the most? In your breaking or in your rebuilding, or was it both?
SPEAKER_00Um I would say both, but it was more so in the breaking, because when you look back, it's like how did I survive that? You know, so it's just like more so I saw more of him as a deliverer. You know, God has multiple names.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00So it's like every attribute you see based on what you went through, it's like he was a deliverer, he was a comforter, he was a friend, he was a savior, he was different things. And then when you get to a different transition, it's like he's the other set of names. So that's how I knew that you know he just wanted me to know it's him that's my doing. Yes, you know, because there came a point in time I was asking a lot of people for help. Yes, what should I do? And going to everybody else except who you're supposed to go to. Right. So it's just like guys like I'm up here. Right.
SPEAKER_04I'm the one with all the answers. Okay.
SPEAKER_00I was just like, okay. So it you know, it's funny now, but before it wasn't funny.
SPEAKER_04No, it wasn't.
SPEAKER_00No, I just girl, no, girl.
SPEAKER_04If you read any of my books, you will know I know, huh? Right. I bleed on the pages all the time. I didn't bleed on so many pages, girl, but it's it's therapy for me. Um Audrey Ann says, sometimes it is hard to be quiet. That's why I write. I can put my thoughts on paper, and then my angel and me work on the words, so they are healing words and not hurting words for me or them. I agree with that, Audrey Ann. You know, it's it's you bleed first, and then you got to make sure you polish it in a way where it doesn't be offensive or come off, you know, other than the way that God, you know, lives inside of you. So you have to make sure that we do the things the correct way. So I'm glad you didn't put his name in there because I had to talk to a couple people. Y'all know who y'all are in this anthology we just released. I had to call them, like, we can't do this. This is not the type of project. You know, you gotta this this project is really to pay homage to God, um, healing and you know, as far as like women of the waiting room, because in each season of your life, how did God deliver you from that waiting room? That's the purpose of the message of the book. Not to drag nobody for filth, that's a whole nother project, honey. This ain't what it's um one more thing before we take another musical break. I want to ask you, well, two more things. Um, how did your relationship with God evolve through this journey?
SPEAKER_00Um I trust him more, more like as a child. Because for our children of God, children of like, you have to trust like a child with their father. You know, a lot of people have father wounds, so it's it's hard. I'm not saying I got it down packed. I'm just saying that I have to every day choose to be optimistic, choose faith, choose trust, choose all the things that can get me to the promise that God. Has for me and to get to the promise for others. Sometimes it's not always about you. It's like God wants you to actually get to where you are, the platform, the ministry that you have, just so others can get delivered. Because I don't know where I got this quote from, but somebody said that you're a walking Bible. You're you're you're the church. Some people don't even walk in through the, you know, the four doors, you know, or two doors, excuse me. Some is four, depending how big the church is. But yeah, they look at you and it's like, oh, you know, God told me X, Y, Z, and it's like I looked at you and it's like, maybe I'll give my life to Christ today. It's like, okay, praise God. So they're they're they're they're looking at you, they're encouraged, they're inspired. So that that's how I feel with that. It's just every day choosing to be a child of God, not choosing to be a title, just choosing to be a child. I agree, I agree.
SPEAKER_04What would you say? What would you say to someone who feels distant from God because of their pain?
SPEAKER_00I say hold on, don't give up. That that that's that's when the devil really wants to come in. And a lot of people walk away from God prematurely and the breakthroughs on the other side. I just say, you know, just keep holding on because you know, they say trouble don't last always. And it's true, it's expiration detection. I mean, I read somewhere in the Bible where it says, you know, God has a way of just orbiting everything, orchestrating everything for his glory. So the fact that he has everything under control should reassure us that this is not going to take us out. The only time it can take you out is when you come out of the covering of God. You know what I mean? So it's just like just you just have to wait it out. And you have to rest and knowing that he got it under control. Right. You can cry, you can worship, you can lay on the floor, you can even be silent. God understands silence. Just you just gotta hold on. And a lot of people, that's when the critical stages, a lot of people think, like, well, I need someone to view me or see me right now. It's like God sees you. And he hears you. Yeah, because sometimes God is trying to protect you because if you get rejected during those, you know, critical points in your uh healing, he can make or break you.
SPEAKER_04Yes, it can.
SPEAKER_00Honestly, I I've seen people just like I just had to pray for them. I had to tell them like this is not how the body price is. So it's just yeah, just hold on. Yeah, just just just hold on.
Musical Break Why Me
SPEAKER_04All right. We will take another musical break, and this is the song Why Me, dedicated to the Women of the Waiting Room, volume three. Um, it is playing on all platforms worldwide. After this break, I'll be back with more from V Davis and Alabaster Heart.
SPEAKER_02Sometimes I don't even celebrate like I should.
SPEAKER_03Cause I remember who didn't make it here with me. I made it out But I don't feel free. Tell me why.
Therapy Or Obedience Through Writing
SPEAKER_04So that was Why Me dedicated to the Women of the Waiting Room, volume three. By listen, Linda, you can find that on all music platforms at our streaming platform music. All right, so now we're gonna go into writing and purpose. Um, did writing this book feel like therapy, obedience, or both?
SPEAKER_00Um I wasn't planning on writing that to be a book. So writing was therapy for me.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Um at first. And then one guy said you need to release it, that was act of obedience. Because I was like, how else are gonna resonate with some people? Um then I was like, wait, huh? So I I just went about it and I I guess it's still speaking to a lot of people today. Um so I'm grateful that I actually just you know put it all together and just act by faith, you know, put it there. And I I'm thankful for Dr. Laquita, you know, publishing it. And uh because at first I didn't know who to really send it to, and I just listened to the Holy Spirit and you know, it just went from there in that time in my life.
SPEAKER_04So yes, I mean it's it's um it's beautiful, you know, to have God speak to you and to um be able to work through people, no matter who the person is, right? Um because at the end of the day, is God, God gets all the glory in that. Um your talent is when I read it, I was like, wow, like this girl needs to be a poet lorette or something like I have like this is like and and I am a poetry fan, right? Fan of poetry.
SPEAKER_01I love poetry.
Poetry Readings And A Grief Story
SPEAKER_04I got I got every page I was there with you. I was crying on some of them. I was like, wow, like you guys do not understand if you've been through heartbreak, if you've been through portrayal, if you've been through living through, you know, um narcissistic abuse, if you've been through any of those things, even grief and loss, and not not necessarily a loss like somebody died, but you still grieve losing people that you really were close to and that you love and they betray you, and you have to let them go. And that is a grieving process in itself. And when I say this book, girl, you did your thing. You could you could have she could have put this on notebook paper and pushed it out there, and it would have still been numbers because at the end of the day, and I tell that to all my people who I publish for as well. I'm just a publisher, right? I hey you could go to any publisher, but it's the content, it's what's on the inside of these pages, the the black on the white is what is gonna capture the audience. You are the talent. You I work for you. You are the talent, you are the person that made this possible. God worked through you to help, and I tell people this all the time as well when writing, and we're going through these things that we're going through, and we don't understand why we're going through these things, right? But we know, well, if if we know God, then we know we all have people that are attached to our assignment. I wrote Mountains Can't Rise Without Earthquakes, and today I'm still getting emails, but it was one email in particular that I got from one of the young ladies from the group home that I went to um do uh speaking with, and she emailed me and told me that she was thinking about committing suicide because she didn't understand why she was going through the things that she was going through, and she thought that nobody had gone through these things before. She didn't understand why God, if it was a God, why would he put her through these things? Right. And she said, after reading that book, after reading my book, and see that I went through those exact same things that she went through 20 years before. And she knows, and she's looking at me and where I am today, she knows that it's an it's it's the other side to through, right? And and it gave her hope, and it you know, it helped her, and it helped her heal because now she has someone she could relate to, and now that she knows that you know there is a God because it was only God that did give me, she could she hadn't even been through half the things I've been through, right? So she knew that she still had purpose here, that it was it was a way out for her, too. And so when you read girl, what I I just want to read y'all this one poem she got in here that really touched me. It's called Mother, do you hear me? This poem, y'all know I lost my mama, so y'all know this one was this one was something. I just want to read it. I want to read it because I want the people to know what they get, amen. I want y'all to know that this girl, the this lady, not girl, this lady is the real deal, okay? Mother, do you hear me? I wonder what they think when I look into their little eyes and tell them again to please wait. I am busy trying to be a better mother, a more godly one, in fact. I have made many mistakes. I wish I could go back and say yes to this and no to that. Present in the moment, yet constantly thinking of my next plan. I daydream of a better future for them, the future God has predestined, a bright future for them, and a future for me to stop worrying. I'm a mom, I lost my mom. So when I hear mother, do you hear me? That that immediately resonated with me because my mom wasn't the best mom. And that was my role model, and I will tell you why, because it taught me everything what not to do, not to do drugs, not to drink, not to be hanging out in the streets, you know what I'm saying? With different people. I have to put my kids first, I have to put my husband first, you know. Those things, all the things that she did not do, I did. And that didn't mean that she didn't love us. My mama loved us down, baby, but she was dealing with things, and those things prevented her from being who she was supposed to be. My mama graduated cum lati with a a degree in in journalism. My mama was phenomenal, right? But she had so many demons that she was fighting, and she was fighting, she was a woman of faith, right? So she was fighting, but she in the end, she just she just gave up. Like you said, don't give up. My mom gave up. My mom committed suicide January of last year, four days before her birthday, her 59th birthday. So when you think about, you know, the things that you wrote in this book, I really want you to understand, you never know who you're touching. Because when I read your booking, girl did something to me. I was like, I love this lady. I gotta know who she is, I gotta know more. Like I have to, I have to work with you in some capacity because your words. I'm gonna read y'all another one, and then we're gonna go back to the question. But y'all just like it was another one. What's it called? Resuscitate me?
SPEAKER_00Yes.
SPEAKER_04Resuscitate me. The devil tried. He tried and he tried. He tried to take my life even as a little child. He attacked my body, my mind, my soul. Growing up, I fatigued easily. Life was surrounded by trouble breathing, breathing treatments, medicines, therapy. I lost my breath many times. My lifeline nearly cut. My heartbeat fading. B beat faint. Clear, beat, beat, stronger. I'm alive again. I know some never got to hear another heartbeat. Some love some lost loved ones due to the very struggles that I survived. I honor their memory. I carry their stories in my heart. There were seasons I almost lost my life, my pulse disappearing into darkness. I worked in healthcare in my mid-20s, surrounded by life and death, yet often felt like the walking dead. God help me. I always ask myself, what do they see? It seems I am constantly helping people in their time of need. God called me to something, but my body was attacked by the devil in different seasons. But God, He rescued me. Be stronger. God is the breath of life. He breathed in me, He breathed in me again, resuscitated my soul, my spirit, my body. I felt him drawing closer, drawing me closer by his spirit. I was in need of a healer. I remembered the time I cried out at a revival, and since then, he became my defender, my shield, my refuge, my safe place in the battle. Through it all, my mother prayed for me, lifting me to God when I couldn't lift myself. I prayed, laying hands on the sick, the weary, the broken. In many seasons, God resuscitated me again and again. He whispered in my spirit, Don't give up. My life is in him. My heart is beating again. My body and my mind are healing by his grace. My pulse is stronger than it's ever been. In seasons, my body wouldn't cooperate to fulfill what God called me to do. I live today not by medical intervention, but by God's salvation and his Holy Spirit running through my veins. Every trap the enemy set failed. Every plan he made overturned. I survived the nights I thought I couldn't. I survived the days I felt too weak. I survived the seasons I didn't want to live. God held my hand. Speak, speak, speak. He breathed life into me when death knocked on my door. God said, Now today, and today I rise. The devil tried, but he didn't know. I was covered, anointed, resurrected by the most high. Today I laugh, I praise, I live, I am alive, I am victorious, I am free, I am his. Amen. Just hearing you speak that peace, baby. As a survivor of thyroid cancer, as a warrior of fibromyalgia, all type of things going on. To read that piece, I'm telling you what resonated with me. You know, when I read that, I was like, resuscitate me. Hmm. I went right to that. I think that was the first one that I read, and I was like, This girl got it. This girl got it. Whoever the governor is in your state need to need to go ahead on and just give you poet Loretta, whatever state you at, because phenomenal. Phenomenal. Now I want to ask you because now we're getting into the uh the real talk segment. What do you hope readers feel after they finish the last page of this book?
SPEAKER_00The last poem was your time will come. I want them to have be inspired, to be hopeful that there is a season of blessings. There's a season of suddenly, God is a goddess suddenly, things can just happen like this. Just after all that pain and heartache that she went through. So I purposely put that as the last poem to leave the readers with something to hope for in the future. It's like, okay, my time will come. Let me let me wait, let me sit this out, let me wait it out and see what is going to be the outcome. And I pray that anyone that has read my book, it will just blow your mind reading that last page. Just take absorb it, pray about it, do what the Holy Spirit tells you to do, and wait for your season. Absolutely.
Healing Is A Process Not Magic
SPEAKER_04That was a great answer. Now, let's be real for a moment. What do people misunderstand about healing?
SPEAKER_00Ooh. Um, me per se, and I believe many others think that healing is instantaneously. Um, they think it's gonna happen overnight tragically. Yeah, overnight. Everything is gotta be overnight. Um, I've been in a couple churches where they that was the doctor, and like overnight, overnight, like everything's overnight.
SPEAKER_04Healed, amen. Yeah, girl, I'm just saying I was wrong now.
SPEAKER_00Get out of here, but okay. When your overnight didn't come, it's like you you said you're like, what's what's going on? So it's just like uh, you know, God takes us through a process. Yes, I learned on my own when they left those type of congregations. So, you know, I'm not gonna get into that, but um a lot of people think that it's supposed to happen now. Like I'm supposed to be healed now. I need this now, God. You know, my sister in Christ got that. I need that now. So it's just like God's like, He ain't trying to hear all that. He already set the path that you're supposed to be taking. I mean you have free will. Yes, you do. I mean, you have free will. You can do what you want to do, but just do what God wants you to do. That's even better. I always tell people, you're gonna reap what you sell. You might as well sell good. I mean, you're gonna reap evil, you're gonna reap good, and you're gonna reap bad. So choose your three.
Outgrowing People And Setting Boundaries
SPEAKER_04Yeah. So I was just I was just speaking on that the other day. I was saying it's a lot of people who be out here just because they dipped in Christian and they quote the scripture. And I was watching a Tyler Perry play the other day. I can't remember the name of it, but I know um it was about a lady who had foster kids, and um uh the bam asked her, Oh, you a Christian? Oh, yes, I love the Lord. Oh, yes, and she started quoting scriptures, and then as soon as she got in there, she was smoking and staying out, going to the casino, beating on them kids, and doing, and it's like that's why I tell people all the time, do not be fooled by these people on social media, they will get you every time you will think that you are with somebody that is Christian, that is this, that is that. They have water down that word down so much. I just tell people I'm a woman of God, I don't even want to use the word no more, because I have been it's so many things that have happened because people put on that mask. So you have to make sure that your discernment is on point. Yes, that your discernment is on point, and that you really listen to what God is telling you to do because people say a lot of things, but they are not who they claim to be. And I had to learn that the hard way. And and I'm telling y'all, she talked about it in this book. She talks, oh, she goes there. I could read some more, but I don't think you got enough time because I've been and read every poem in here, child. That's how I really loved this book. Um another question I want to ask you, and then we'll get to the game. Have you ever outgrown people during your healing journey? Was it people that you that you had to lose?
SPEAKER_00Yes. Um, either by God's doing or I had to manually do it myself. Um and it was kind of hard because it's just like, where's my community at? It's just I'm going through this situation. I'm thinking I need to be surrounded by people all the time. And I realized like the times I'm alone, it's like, oh, anxiety's coming, and then the voices are coming, and just the doubt is coming. And um God's put me in and I guess a semi-isolation, you know, just so I can kind of see that you know who God is. Yeah, because before I got into but alone time will bring you clear. Yeah, yeah. Because before I got into all these different types of situations, because I had such a good heart and thought people like, oh I can change them, Lord. And it's just like it's like, okay, go ahead. You know, your daddy said, You're gonna learn. You're gonna learn. Yeah, I I learned. It's just I learned the hard way, and I realized some of those people are you just you just had a cut, you know. So I thank God that He removed some people instead of me having to do it.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, because we are so blinded, especially me as an empath, as an empathetic person. Um, I I love on people, right? And when I love on you, like I really love on you, like I want to help you in whatever way I can. How can I? How can I? How can I? But in doing that, you never really know who's for you or who's for what God has on your life. Because people, especially the season saints, they will see the blessing on your life, they will see what God has for you, and they want a piece of that, so they want to stay in proximity, they want the proximity, you know what I'm saying? That's true, yeah. But they don't want you, they don't like you, right? Because it's jealousy, it's envy, or whatever it is, and and men can be jealous too. They can see the favor on your life, they can be they could see the favor on your life. Thank god I got a great husband because they could see the favor. I've been in relationships where I was thriving. I've always been a young entrepreneur fee since I was 18 years old. I started a modeling agency at 20. I had a line of people, I was doing parties, we were doing runways, we're doing a lot, and I was dealing with a person, and he wanted to all of a sudden now he wants to be a party promoter now, you know, and it wasn't working for him like it was working for me. And I was in I was in such a emotionally abusive relationship, not necessarily putting his hands on me, but emotionally because of jealousy, because who did I think I was right? And so you experience that. I experienced that with friendships, I experienced that with work relationships. They want your oil, they want your talent, right? But they don't want to let people know that it's you doing this, doing it right, and then when you realize, like, hey, I am gifted, I can do this because I'm doing it for everybody else, so let me do it for me, right? Oh no, don't do that, don't do that. Don't don't start walking in your purpose, girl. Don't start being who God called you to be. Don't step out of the shadows and be who God called you to be, girl. Don't you do that? Oh no, you lose everybody because now what's the point of having you around if I can't benefit from it, right? You know, so you have to um, and she talked about that in this book too, telling y'all everything that we're talking about today. I've read it in the book, I've experienced it, and that's what made me really love this book. Like, because I was like, here's a girl that gets me. And I guarantee you, if I'm one of those people, it's so many people who, if they have already have it, they know that it's benefiting them, or if you get it, it will benefit you for sure. For sure. Now, last question, we're gonna get to the game. What boundaries did you have to set to protect your peace?
SPEAKER_00Looks like it lagged.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, it did a little bit. I said, What boundaries did you have to set to protect your peace?
SPEAKER_00Oh boundaries. Um a lot of them. Most of them is having just laying the framework, you're you know, letting them know you're not gonna disrespect me in this area. Um, this is my cutoff time, you know. Um, this is what I can and can do. Um, I'm not going back and forth with you. So stuff like that, um, I had to lay out for a couple people.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00I'm saying this in love. You know, I give you three warnings. Some people, and then now it's just like for certain people, just like I'm done. I I just I just walk away. Yeah, I tried. So it's like some of them you just gotta pray at a distance. So amen.
This Or That Heart Edition
SPEAKER_04Shannon says, So true. Amen. Amen. Now we're gonna get to the interactive segment, and y'all know how I love my games. This game is called This or That Heart Edition, okay? Because I read this or that in one of your poems, so that's why I chose this and that for the title. Okay, okay, Fee. So we're about to lighten it up, but it's still gonna hit, okay? So let's go with the first one healing in silence or healing out loud, silence, journaling or praying out loud.
SPEAKER_00It depends, but journaling.
SPEAKER_04Isolation never gotta hear you. Amen. You take a story that was mad praying out loud, but you got it, girl. Um isolation season or community healing it's no right or wrong, it's your answer. It's no right or wrong. Um crying it out or worshiping through it.
SPEAKER_00I love worshiping. I worship through it.
SPEAKER_04Letting it go slowly or cutting it off completely. Why?
SPEAKER_00I used to I'm I'm I'm a boy mom. I'm always busy, right? And being active sometimes, you don't live in the moment. You don't your body, your brain can't really comprehend what it is you're doing. And that's kind of like you're still in a excuse me, fight and flight mode where your body feels like you got to take off all the time, do this real quick and get up out of there. So I'd rather just take things slow now, as opposed to always hopping here, hopping there, doing this, doing that. Some people, it's good for them, but it didn't quite work for me because it kind of took me back to the seasons where I was doing that anyways. Yeah, so I kind of moved slower. I'm not saying I'm an old old person, I'm just kind of just like I like the simple things now. Yeah, you know, I can relate to that.
SPEAKER_04Just taking it slow. Now let's talk to the listener for a second. If someone is in their breaking season right now, what would you say directly to them?
SPEAKER_00In their breaking season. Can you elaborate a little bit more?
SPEAKER_04Like if they're in that season right now where they feel broken and they don't know where to turn to or what to do, they feel let down by everybody in their life, they feel let down by God, they're in that break-in season. What would you say directly to them?
SPEAKER_00I wouldn't say anything. Sometimes just showing up there and being in their presence is just enough. So some people don't want to hear all the Bible talk, yeah. Um, when they're broken, you know, just letting them vent, just sometimes just sitting there until there's like, you know, thank you for being here. They they recognize that you're there. It's just that they want to know that physically someone is there. God is a spirit and he uses people, and you're at that particular time the person God wanting to use. So, um, but if someone's like vocal, they want to hear you speak. I will just tell them, um, you matter. You matter, you you you you need to be here. There's people waiting on you to get through this, to get to the other side, and you're you're gonna see why all this happened. Yeah, you know, so some people some people just need that reassurance, they matter, you know, not nothing else. It's just I'm here for a purpose, yeah. Not to be used, I'm not a garbage can, you know, I'm not uh uh damaged goods. Um I'm I'm something special in the eyes of God and other people.
SPEAKER_04So I love that answer. I love that answer. What does pouring out your alabaster heart look like in real life?
SPEAKER_00In real life, um, just my lifestyle. I I'm not infallible, but you know, I find different creative ways. I mean, I I use my social media. Um I worship, you know, I like showing dispressing through my clothing, you know, hair glasses. You got it. Yeah, I was doing errands, it should have been more polished.
SPEAKER_04No, no, you look good. See, even on the Monday, you look good. You know, if we ain't got together, we'll throw on a dead hat, baby, and a team jacket.
SPEAKER_00Like, got it, girl. You got it. Yeah, well, as a boy mom, you gotta be quick with the clothing. Um I I find different ways. Is uh sometimes I go sightseeing, you know, try to meet new people and try to find different ways every day. Also, I'm not bored.
SPEAKER_04But um what you could call me.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, no, no, no, no. I'm I'm never bored actually. It's just like sometimes it's like moments can be so slow. Yes and when you're still in the healing process, it's just like I need I need something with adrenaline. Yes like it took me a while for me to be as calm as I was. Um, because I felt like I did I just need to always go because I was in healthcare and I was like here, there, there, there. So yeah, that's my answer.
Starting Healing With The Truth
SPEAKER_04Okay, that was a good answer. That was a good answer. I can I can relate to that as well. How can someone start healing if they don't even know where to begin?
SPEAKER_00Oh, um, healing starts when you're um true to yourself, you're being truthful. You can't can't heal in a lie. So I had to, I know for me personally, I had to be truthful. Um, because based off the doctrines and all the different stuff I used to listen to, um it took a while for me to know the truth of the word of God myself. And it's just like that's where the light comes in. They said this the truth will set you free, not not a lie, not you know, faking it till you make it. Come on now, you know. If you're hurting, you're hurting, you know. And people who are prophetic can see that, so you can't hide that from them.
SPEAKER_04So okay, but so just because I had people call me out plenty of time, girl. You ain't good. Yeah, it's like you are not good.
SPEAKER_00It's like I see you smiling, you be laughing, but you ain't fooling me. A lot of people hide behind a smile, and it's just like I look at the eyes.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, my daddy always tell me, watch that person who smiles. That person who's smiling all the time, either they hurt or they they they the devil.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, that's true, that's true.
SPEAKER_04I don't get anybody's eyes, but some some people watch that person who always gotta smile, they ain't mad about nothing.
SPEAKER_00No, or something's going on, yeah.
SPEAKER_04Some people and they write.
SPEAKER_00So yeah, I some people I look at their eyes and their body language, yes, like and it's like, oh, okay, when they're ready, they can tell me, or God will want me to say just a couple sentences to them or not even say anything, but um it it's different, uh depending on the environment. Environment is that factor too.
SPEAKER_04So absolutely, I think that's a great answer. Um, and I and I feel the exact same way. A lot of times we just we want we want to help people so bad, but they they wear the mask. So it's you don't want to force someone to tell you what they're going through, but you still want to leave that gateway open just in case it's something that God can use you for. But we got to use discernment in that too. Um discernment is a big word for me this week, or that is a big word for me. You have no idea what I'd have been through, but discernment, discernment, discernment. Um, now this is we're coming up to our mic drop moment. I want you to finish the sentence. I knew I was becoming whole when I knew I was becoming a whole.
SPEAKER_00I'll piggyback what I said before. You I can hear the person's name and there's no reaction.
Where To Buy And Connect
SPEAKER_04Yes, that's a good answer. So now I want you to tell everyone where they can find Alabaster Heart, how they can connect with you, and stay tapped into what you're doing next.
SPEAKER_00Okay, um, you can find my book here, Alabaster Heart on, you know, on um Facebook, um Phi Davis, I think it's 08. Um, I have my book there, and then I have my website is www.alabaster, and then it has a little bash, I guess you can say, heart.com, and you can buy it from there. It's primarily on Amazon. So okay, so is this it?
SPEAKER_04Yes. Okay, so you can find Alabaster Heart in all of these books at www.alabaster-heart.com or on Amazon. But y'all know how I do. I don't want to send people to Amazon. You have to support the author and get it from her website. And tell the people what you have coming up next.
SPEAKER_00I don't even know what God wants me to do next. I mean, he's talking to me about certain things. I'm still praying about it, but um, you'll catch me at something. Amen.
Closing Prayer And Final Charge
SPEAKER_04Well, she was uh co-author in our uh women of the way three, um, The Poetic Ministry. So, do you have that on your website as well so people can pre-order from you? I'm I'm working on that one. I'm gonna get it up there. So that will be there. Get it from her, yes, okay. Don't get it from Amazon, get it from her. Okay, so she will keep you all updated on that. You all can find her on Facebook at Fee Davis. Fee Davis, F-E-D-A-B-I-S. Okay, all right, fee. Well, we're going to close out in prayer. I brought it in. I'm gonna let you take us out, okay? Okay, okay.
SPEAKER_00Heavenly Father, in Jesus' name, we just thank you for this gathering, this opportunity to just lift up your name. I just pray that anyone that's hurting right now or just questioning who you are, oh God, that you reveal to them in the midnight hour and every season, oh God, let them be steadfast, let them have the faith of a muster seed. It just takes that small amount of faith, oh God, for them to move mountains. I ask, oh God, that every single letter comes off the page into their heart and restores them, oh God. And I ask that you, oh Lord, that you find a community of believers who will love on them and show them that they are worthy and that their life matters. And that God, in these times that we're in, I ask you, oh God, that you continue to provide all from our brothers and sisters in crisis and their families. And I ask, oh God, that you continue to uh by your spirit stir up the gifts, because the gifts will make room for us so that we can be presented to different people on different platforms who do not know God, but God, you will be on center stage, and that in the end we will win and we will be victorious in Jesus' name. Amen.
Outro Song God Did That
SPEAKER_04Amen, amen, amen. Thank you so much, Fee, for coming in today. Um, thank you for having me. I I truly appreciate it. And to my listeners, listen, if this episode touched you in any way, don't keep it to yourself, okay? Share it with somebody who needs it. And if you ever felt like your story didn't matter, let this be your reminder. Your voice is your tool, and your healing is somebody else's survival guide. This is the Listen Linda Book Club Live podcast, where we don't just talk, we transform. I'm your girl, Dr. Jacqueline Cox. This is my girl over here, Phi Davis, and we can see you all next time. God bless y'all, and I will leave y'all with God Did That streaming on all platforms worldwide. Talk to you soon.
SPEAKER_03I did that. No strength, new faith, I did that. When they brought me out the waiting room, I did that. Whole glow breakthrough. I did that. I remember being broken in the waiting room. But he's stepping with a joy that cleared a gloom. He said, Girl, I'm a guy who makes storms behave. Now I'm dancing in the freedom only Jesus cave. My mountains rose, cause my earthquake shook. My praise is allowed. Go ahead, take a look. You can't stop what the Lord ordains. I'm prove that beauty grows through rain. He gave me as low as he blessed me. You see this joy, baby. That's how crazy. He never let me stay the whole time. Now watch his glory shine. He did it, he did it, he did it. My joy back it. My peace back. He did it. My mind did it. He did it, did it, my joy back did it, my peace back He did it, he did it, he did it, he did it, he did it, my joy back, he did it, my peace back, I might strengthen. Yeah Look at me now I did that Every setback, it's a every mountain he move I did every table through the way into everything I did no strength, no faith I did that I'll do it in home in the purpose. I did that whole breakthrough, I did that. Yeah Look at me now Only when I give the credit I did I did
