Peace In The Storm

The storm is not always a sign you missed God. Sometimes it is the proof you are moving. I sit with the person who followed the call, made the leap, stayed obedient and then watched the waves rise anyway, because that moment can make you question everything you thought you heard. 

We go straight to Mark 4 and the disciples’ boat that starts taking on water while Jesus is still on board, then we pull that truth into real life: cancer, loss, betrayal, addiction, divorce, financial stress, anxiety, and the quiet kind of survival nobody claps for. I talk about faith that looks like getting out of bed, sending the email, feeding the kids, whispering one sentence to God, and choosing not to quit. We also name the pain of praying hard while God feels silent, and why honesty is not a lack of faith. 

Then we get practical about finding peace in the storm. Peace is not control. Peace is not getting your way. Peace is fear not driving the boat. We talk boundaries, unlearning survival habits, and what it means to stop living like it is still raining long after the clouds moved on. If you have ever felt suspicious of calm, stuck in hypervigilance, or tempted to rebuild chaos because it is familiar, this conversation gives language and a path forward. 

I also share why testimony matters, how to tell the truth without using your story as revenge, and how Through the Rain Volume 2 is inviting women to write about where they found peace, not just what they survived. If this hits home, subscribe, share it with someone who is tired, and leave a review so more people can find hope when the weather gets rough.

Transcript

The Storm Makes You Question

SPEAKER_00 0:17

Welcome back to another episode of Listen Linda. Listen now, listen, I need, excuse me, y'all. I just had some great food. I need to talk to the person who has been sitting somewhere and they have been wondering, God, what did I what did I miss? Because life got hard. Things start falling apart. People started acting funny. The plan didn't work the way you thought it would. The door you were sure God was opening suddenly became difficult. And then somewhere along the way, you started thinking, maybe just maybe I made the wrong decision. Maybe I didn't hear God. Maybe I moved too fast. Maybe this storm is the proof that I'm somewhere I was never supposed to be. But I want to reel you in. Because what if I told you you can be exactly where God told you to be and still encounter a storm? I'm gonna run that back again. And I'm gonna run it back for the people who were taught that obedience means ease. You can be obedient and be uncomfortable at the same time. You can be called and confused, you can be chosen and challenged, you can be praying and still crying. You can be walking with God and still have days where you don't even understand what in the world he is doing.

Mark 4 And The Sudden Squall

SPEAKER_00 2:19

So I want to take you to Mark chapter 4. Jesus had been teaching all day. Here come the evening, and Jesus tells his disciples, let us go over to the other side. Now catch this. The disciples didn't, they didn't come up with the trip. Jesus did. Right? So they get into the boat. They're following the instructions. They are being obedient.

unknown 3:03

Right?

SPEAKER_00 3:05

And then just out of nowhere, here comes this storm. Squall came up and waves began breaking over the boat so bad that the boat was filling with water. Now wait a minute. You mean to tell me I can be following Jesus and my boat can still start taking on water. Yep. That's why some of us get it messed up. Because we've built this theology that says if God is in it, everything should go smooth, Sam. Who told us that? Who's who said that? Because it wasn't in the Bible. I didn't see it. Now Joseph was in God's will and ended up in a pit. Joseph was in God's will and ended up falsely accused. Joseph was in God's will and ended up in prison. Right? David was anointed and still had to run for his life. David was faithful. He was faithful and still ended up in the lion's den. The three Hebrew boys that refused to compromise and still got thrown into the furnace. Paul was doing ministry and still got shipwrecked. Jesus himself was perfect and still got crucified. So where did we get this idea that difficulty automatically means God is not there? Sometimes difficulty is happening because you're moving. A parked car doesn't experience resistance from the wind the way a moving car does. Sometimes the resistance is not confirmation that you should stop. Sometimes it's confirmation that you're actually going somewhere. And baby, there are some people listening right now who almost walked away from something God told you to do because it got hard. You almost quit that business. No, not because God told you to stop, but because you assumed resistance meant rejection. And I need you to hear me. A storm doesn't automatically mean turn around and go home. Sometimes the word is still go to the other side. Go to the other side. Now Isaiah 43 and 2 says, When you pass through the waters, I will be with you. When, not if God never promised you wouldn't, you know, you wouldn't never experience water. He promised the water wouldn't have you by yourself.

Survival Is Evidence Of Presence

SPEAKER_00 6:41

And this is where I think a lot of us have misunderstood God's presence. We keep asking God, if you're with me, why is this happening? And sometimes God is just simply saying, the fact that you're still standing is evidence that I'm with you. Because there are some things you went through that should have taken you out. And I'm not talking about uh the cute church version. I'm talking about things that made you lay in bed staring at the ceiling. I remember I had two neck surgeries, thyroid cancer, two within a month, two within four weeks. And I was laying there and I was staring at the ceiling. They had cut my neck from here to here, and I was staring at the ceiling, I was in so much pain, but they couldn't give me no more pain meds because they had just gave me pain meds, not even two hours to go. You got to wait four hours before they can give you some more. And I remember I was laying there and then I was staring at the ceiling, and I remember only having one visitor the whole time I was there. A lot of people call only one person came. He's my husband now, he was my friend then, but I remember staring there alone, second surgery, nobody come, and I'm just laying there and I'm just like, God, why are you uh why are you letting this happen to me? Why am I here? I'm 24 years old and I got thyroid cancer. Why? Why me? Things could you could post about, right? Things you didn't tell everybody, things that had you driving in silence because music was just too much, things that had you crying in the shower because you didn't want your children to see you, things that had you smiling in people's faces and then going home and falling completely apart. Some of y'all have survived betrayal, divorce, addiction, incarceration, abuse, homelessness, grief, losing parents, losing children, losing siblings, losing friendships, losing business, losing yourself. And somehow you are still here. Maybe you don't feel strong, but you're here. Right? Maybe hey Dr. Tina, maybe you're still healing, but you're here. Maybe you still have questions, but you're here. And sometimes survival doesn't look like shouting around a church. Sometimes survival looks like I got out of bed today, I went to work, I fed my kids, I answered an email, I prayed one sentence, I didn't give up. Now that's faith too. We have made faith look so polished that people think they're failing when they're just struggling. But go read Psalms because David was talking crazy sometimes. David was like, God, where are you? Psalms 13. How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever?

unknown 10:31

That's in the Bible.

SPEAKER_00 10:33

David wasn't saying, everything is amazing. Won't he do it? No. David said, How long? Have you ever had a how long prayer? How long am I gonna have to deal with this? How long am I gonna have to grieve? How long am I gonna have to keep starting over? How long before something changes? How long before they understand? How long before I feel like myself again? But here's the beautiful part of that. God didn't quite disqualify David because he had questions. God can handle your questions. Faith is not pretending you aren't hurt. Faith is not pretending you aren't hurting. You can trust God and cry. You can trust God and be angry. You can trust God and need therapy. You can trust God and need rest. You can trust God and say, I don't understand this. You can even tell God, I don't like what you are allowing to happen right now. Faith is not denying reality. Faith is saying, This is real, this hurts, I don't understand it. Okay, I don't get it. But I refuse to make this storm bigger than my God is. We had over 30 women telling stories of survival, faith, grief, healing, rebuilding, and both installments went on to become international best sellers. And of course, everybody knows I am grateful for that. But what mattered to me more than any ranking ever could was what those rankings represented. Somebody somewhere needed those stories. Some woman bought that book because she was standing in the reign of her own, and maybe she opened somebody else's chapter and thought, hmm, she went through that too. That's the power of testimony. Because sometimes scriptures tell you that you'll survive, but then somebody else's shows the story of what survival looked like. That's why Revelation 12 and 11 talks about overcoming by the blood of the Lamb and the word of testimony. Your testimony tells somebody God was there. Not theoretically, not because somebody preached it, right? But because I was there. I know what that feels like to have my heart broken. I know what it feels like to bury somebody that I love. I know what it feels like to be broke, I know what it feels like to make mistakes, I know what it feels like to lose everything, just like Joe did. I know what it feels like to wonder where life is ever going to look normal again. And I'm still here. But here's the part I really want you to hear today.

Anchors, Peace, And Old Words

SPEAKER_00 14:31

Sometimes the storm is not attacking where you're going. Sometimes, just sometimes, the storm is revealing what you're anchored to. You don't know whether an anchor works while the water is calm. But you'll find out when the wind starts pulling, and some storms taught us, baby, I was anchored to the wrong thing. I was anchored to people's approval. I was anchored to my marriage. I was anchored to a title. I was anchored to being needed. I was anchored to being light. I was anchored to social media. I was anchored to having every single thing planned. I was anchored to controlling every single thing around me. And then the storm came. People left, money changed, relationships changed, plans changed, my body changed, my family changed, and suddenly I thought every single thing that made me secure started moving. And God said, What are you standing on? When everything around you becomes unstable, you start discovering what actually is stable. And in Psalms 46, one of my favorite chapters, it says, God is our refuge and our strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Then it says, Therefore, we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea. In other words, everything around me can move, and I can still know where my foundation is. That's peace. And that's what we're gonna talk more about. That because peace does not mean you're never afraid. Peace doesn't mean you don't have moments, peace doesn't mean you don't cry. Peace doesn't mean the storm suddenly becomes cute. Peace means fear doesn't get to drive the boat. And let me give you something else. Jesus told them, let us go over to the other side. He gave them the destination before they saw the storm. That's important because when the storm started, they forgot what he said. And don't we do that? God tells you something when everything is calm. Then trouble starts and settling your question in the word. God said, You're going to the other side. Then the waves say, You're gonna die here. Which one are you gonna believe? The storm will always try to make you forget what God said before it started. That's why you've got to remember what he said in the calm. What did God tell you before everything started talking? What did he show you before your fear got louder? What did you know before the circumstances changed? Because sometimes you don't need a new word, you need to remember the old one. Now Jesus said, other side. The storm said, This is the end. But the storm didn't have the authority, my God, to rewrite the destination. And maybe somebody listening needs to hear that. The storm doesn't need to rename your ending. Divorce didn't get to name your ending. Grief doesn't get to name your ending. Bankruptcy doesn't get to name your ending. Mistakes don't get to name your ending. Addiction doesn't get to name your ending. Incarceration doesn't get to name your ending. Right?

SPEAKER_04 18:40

How long? How long?

SPEAKER_00 18:51

Rejection doesn't get to name your ending. What they did to you doesn't get to name your ending. God does. Now, that doesn't mean everything will look exactly like you imagined it to. Sometimes reaching the other side means becoming somebody you didn't know you needed to become. Sometimes the blessing isn't getting the old thing back. Sometimes the blessing is discovering I don't need it no more. Sometimes deliverance isn't God restoring that relationship. Sometimes deliverance is God restoring you. Sometimes healing isn't forgetting what happened. Healing can sometimes be able to remember it without controlling your nervous system, your decisions, your relationships, and your future. Sometimes peace is looking at what almost destroyed you and realizing you don't own me no more. That's where we are going in this series. Because maybe you've been praying. God, stop this storm. Stop it. And God may be answering, I will. But first, you need to discover that even while the storm is raging, I'm here with you. You are not alone. So here's what I want you to sit with before we come back for part two. What storm are you interpreting as evidence that God has abandoned you? And if what you've interpreted, what if you interpreted that wrong? What if God has never left you? What if God hasn't changed his mind? What if the destination is still the destination? What if you just in the middle of that? Don't make permanent decisions in the middle of temporary weather. Don't abandon your assignment because it's raining. Don't jump out the boat because the waves got high. Don't assume that just because you can't see the shore, that is not there. Jesus said, Let us go over to the other side. And baby, if he said, let us go over to the other side, I'm gonna need you to stop letting a temporary storm convince you that this is where your story ends. So we're gonna come back, but we're gonna talk about the part of Mark 4 that bothers me the most because this the disciples they panicking, the boat filling with water, the storm raging, and Jesus is asleep. I was just talking to Dr. Velma last month on her show about that, about how um it was a tornado near my house. And and my kids was like, Mommy, it's a tornado, it's a tornado. And I went back to sleep. Thought I thought about Mark IV. Could go look it up. I was on Finding My Voice with Dr. Velma Bagby. And we were talking about this. So, what do you do when you're screaming and it feels like God is sleeping through your emergency? That's part two. But first, what I want y'all to do, I want y'all to watch this. And I'll be right back. I'm gonna play. Let me see what I'm gonna play. I'm going to play the trailer for Through the Rain. And I will be right back.

When God Feels Silent

SPEAKER_00 23:46

I am back with part two. Now, we were talking about Mark 4, right? I want to make sure I'm clear. So now I told you before the break that we were going to deal with the part of the story that bothers me because I can handle the storm. Well, let me not lie. I don't like the storm, but at least I understand that storms happen, right? What gets me is this the storm is raging. The boat is filled with water. The disciples are terrified. And Jesus is in the back of the boat, sleep, sir. Jesus, we got a solution. We have a situation. This ain't no time now. And and and maybe you have never said exactly that, but I know somebody listening has felt it. God, where are you? Because there's one kind of pain that comes from going through something difficult, right? But there's another kind of pain that comes from going through something difficult while feeling like God is silent. Those are two different storms that are happening to you at one time. Sometimes the circumstances are not even the hardest part. The hardest part is, God, I prayed. I prayed before it happened. I prayed while it was happening. I prayed after it happened. I fasted, I believed, I stood on your scripture. I asked other people to pray. I cried, I begged, I did everything I knew how to do, and it still happened. Now what? Now what? See, we don't like talking about that part of the faith. Because that part don't fit nicely on a church program. We like testimonies with clean endings. I asked God to do this for me and He did it. Amen. But what about I prayed and God didn't do it? I asked. Can we talk about that God? The God who is still God when the answer is no? The God who is still God when the answer is wait, the God who is still God when you never get the explanation. The God who is still God when the thing you begged him to save dies anyway. The relationship, the dream, the opportunity, the business, the version of your life that you were thought you was gonna have. Sometimes you're not grieving a person, you're grieving what you thought your life was supposed to be. A grief, because that one is real too. You thought you'd be married by now. You thought you'd still be married, you thought your children would be doing differently in life, you thought your parents would be here longer, you thought your body would cooperate, you thought the business would be further than it is. You thought after everything you've been through, surely this season would finally be easy for you. And then another storm comes. And you're looking at God like, excuse me, don't you think I had enough character development? I'm in my 60s, I'm in my 70s. God, I am developed, I have learned. Can somebody else get a lesson? Because sometimes I see this all the time. I see it all over my timeline. God, I'm tired of being a strong one. God, I don't want to be strong no more. Can we say that? Sometimes you don't want another testimony, sometimes you don't want another lesson. Sometimes you don't want somebody telling me, God give his toughest battle to his strongest soldiers. Please leave me alone. Sometimes you want God to fix it and fix it right now. How about just don't let it happen? And I need somebody listening to understand you are allowed to bring that honesty to God. You don't have to clean yourself up emotionally before you pray. Prayer is not a performance. God already knows what you're thinking, so you might as well tell Jeremiah. And this is what you know, I named my son Jaden Jeremiah because very outspoken. I knew that before he came here, God gave me that name for my child. Jeremiah told God exactly how he felt. He lost everything. Jesus himself in the garden, he prayed, My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Think about that. Jesus knew his assignment. And he still said, if there's another way, that tells me something. Being surrendered doesn't mean you have to enjoy what surrender costs. You can say, God, I don't want this, and still finish, yet not as I will, but as you will. That's faith. Not pretending, not performing, not smiling when you're bleeding. Honesty and surrender. And that's where the disciples are. They're scared. So they wake Jesus up and they listen to what they and then I want you to listen to what they asked, asked him. And Mark 4, I think it's 38. I think it's 38. Teacher, don't you care if we drown? Don't you care? Now that's a real question. Because notice they don't ask, Jesus, are you powerful? They've already seen power, they've watched him heal, they saw him teach, they know there's something different about this man. They question ain't about his ability. They question is about his care. Don't you care? And prolonged storms will do that to you. You start out believing God can. Then after enough disappointment, the question becomes, but does God care about me? You watch somebody else receive the very thing that you've been praying for, and you clap for them, you congratulate them, you comment, won't he do it, girl? Yes, he will, girl. But then you put the phone down and you think, God, what about me? Let's tell the truth. Somebody announces a pregnancy while you're dealing with infertility. Somebody gets married while you're healing from divorce. Somebody's parents recovers while you're planning that funeral for yours. Somebody's business explodes, but yours is barely surviving, just had to close the doors. Somebody's child graduates while yours is struggling. Somebody gets the house, the contract, the healing, the opportunity. And you're happy for them. But you hurt. And then the guilt comes because now you feel bad for hurting. Well, some of y'all do. So you're carrying that disappointment and guilt about the disappointment. No. Bring all of it. Bring all of it to God. God is not intimidated by your humanity. In Psalm 62, I forget what verse. I want to say it's eight. I could be wrong. So don't quote me, but I know Psalm 62 it says, Pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge.

Pour It Out Without Shame

SPEAKER_00 32:33

Pour it out. I tell everybody who comes into my anthologies, even people who come in publishing with me, bleed on paper. So don't edit it, don't sanitize it. Don't make it sound spiritual. Bleed it out. Pour it out. God, I'm jealous. Pour it out. God, I'm angry. Pour it out. God, I'm disappointed. Pour it out. God don't understand why you allowed this. Pour it out. God, I'm scared. Pour it out. God, I'm tired of being strong. Pour it out. Bleed on paper. Bleed in your war room. Bleed on your knees while you're talking to God. Bleed is why you watch while you uh look at your reading your word. Because peace cannot enter a heart that's constantly pretending. Sometimes the beginning of peace is finally telling the truth about how much it really hurts you. Sometimes the beginning of peace, my God, is finally telling the truth about how much it really hurts you. Don't minimize it. Don't say, well, other people have it worse. Maybe that do. That doesn't mean you are not hurting. Pain is not a competition. You don't have to earn the right to grieve. You don't have to compare your storm to somebody else's hurricane before you're allowed to admit that you wet. That's a word right there. Stop comparing the rain. Because what nearly drowned you may have barely touched somebody else. What somebody else survived easily might have broken you. We're different. Our histories are different, our capacities are different, our wounds are different, our support systems are different. So stop letting somebody else's tolerance determine whether your pain is legitimate or not. If you said it hurt, it hurt. So Jesus is asleep. The disciples interpret his sleep as indifference. But what if they misunderstood his calm? What if Jesus wasn't asleep because he didn't care? What if he wasn't what what if he was asleep because he wasn't afraid? What if what terrified them didn't threaten him? The things that had them screaming, it was it wasn't making Jesus nervous. The things they thought was about to end everything wasn't powerful enough to disturb his sleep. God ain't panicking. So we think that God not paying attention. No, no, no. Maybe God not panicking because he already knows how this ends. He wrote it. You see the wave, God sees the shore. You see the diagnosis, God sees the whole story. You see what they did, God see, he sees what he can still redeem. You see the closed door, God saw what was behind it. You see the delay, God sees the timing. You see everything is falling apart. God may see everything is being rearranged in your favor. This is what faith gets uncomfortable for a lot of us. Because I would love to tell you if you just trust God, He's gonna explain everything. I can't tell you that. Because sometimes he doesn't. And then there are things that happen in this life that you may never understand. And I think we do people a disservice when we force meaning onto every tragedy. Somebody loses a child, we immediately start telling them God needed another angel. Don't do that. People don't become angels when they die and grieve, and people don't always need the explanation. Sometimes they need somebody to sit beside them to say, This hurts you, but I'm here for you. Sometimes tragedy is just that, it's tragedy. Sometimes evil is evil, sometimes somebody else's decision causes the damage. Sometimes bodies get sick, sometimes accidents happen. Sometimes we live in a broken world where terrible terrible things happen to good people. But here's what I believe. Y'all don't gotta believe. I believe it. God does not have to author the storm to meet you inside of it. And God does not have to call the storm to bring something good from your survival. In Romans, it says, everything that happens is good. Romans 8 and 28. Everything that happens is good. And it says God works in all things for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose. Now that is different. The abuse wasn't good, the addiction wasn't good, the betrayal wasn't good, the death wasn't good, the incarceration wasn't good, the homelessness wasn't good, the heartbreak wasn't good. But God says, give me the pieces. And sometimes and somehow God can take something that should have destroyed your entire identity and began rebuilding from it. That's redemption. Not pretending the storm was beautiful. But discovering the storm didn't get everything. The storm didn't get everything. It took something, yes. We not gonna lie. Some storms cost you, some storms change you permanently, some storms left scars, some storms left empty chairs, they left six in five years for me. A nephew, my daddy, my mama, my my foster mama, my foster sister, my best friend. Six some storms changed holidays forever. Some storms divided families ain't man. Some storms changed your finances, some storms changed your body, some storms changed how you trust. But hear me, it didn't get everything. You are still here, your purpose is still here, your capacity to love is still here, your ability to begin again is still here, your voice is still here. Your relationship with God may look different, but you're still here, and maybe you don't pray the way you used to. Maybe your prayers ain't all fancy. Maybe you don't have 20 minutes of eloquent language or be able to speak in tongues, but some days your prayers, Jesus, help me. Lord, Jesus, help me, Lord. That's enough. Romans 8 and 26 says the spirit helps us in our weakness and intercedes when we don't even know what we should pray to or what we ought to pray. So there are seasons where your tears have vocabulary, your groaning has vocabulary, your silence has vocabulary. God understands the prayer that you don't always know how to articulate.

Peace Is Not Getting Your Way

SPEAKER_00 41:15

And this is where we need to talk about peace. Because some of us have confused peace with getting our way. We say, God, give us peace. But what that really means is God make everything happen the way I want it to happen so I can relax. That's not peace. That's controlled, and God can't be controlled. Some of us are asking God for peace, but what we're really asking Him for is permission to control the outcome and calling that prayer. Yep, God don't work like that. We want to say, God, I surrender. But here's exactly how I want you to fix it for me right now. God have your way, but preferably by Tuesday. It's it's Saturday now. I need it to happen by Tuesday. But have your way. God, whatever you want. But let me send you this detailed proposal. No peace begins where your demand for the control ends. And I know that's hard. That is so hard. That's so hard. You want to be in control of everything so bad, you'll walk into somebody else's stuff trying to control them and then telling them that they're controlling you. You'll walk into a job and say, I can't be controlled. You got a boss. You'll walk to somebody's school and tell the principal or the dean, y'all too controlling in here. It's their school. You'll walk on somebody's project and say, I don't want to do it like that. But it's their project. God feels the same way. You walking on his green earth, but you want to control it. Because control makes us feel safe. If I can predict everybody, if I can manage everybody, if I just know what happens next, if I keep enough money, if I make enough plans, if I monitor everything, if I stay 10 steps ahead, then nothing can surprise me, but baby, life will eventually introduce you to some things you can't control. We call those plot twists. Because then what? That's why Philippians 4, 6 through 7 matters. Paul says, Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your request to God. And then the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your mind in Christ Jesus. Notice what it doesn't say. It don't say, and God will immediately change every circumstance for you. It says peace will guard you. That means every situation might still be happening. And peace shows up anyway. That's why it surpasses all understanding. Because logically, I shouldn't be okay. I don't went through thyroid cancer. I have lupus. I'm I'm fighting lupus. I'm fighting fibromyalgia. I'm fighting anemia. Usher syndrome. Rumatory arthritis. Me. Logically, I shouldn't be okay. My daddy had a brain aneurysm, fell into a coma, had pneumonia on the brain, woke up, went to went through physical therapy, fell into a diabetic coma, came out of that, went through physical therapy again, went to long-term care, only just to dive COVID. Two years in the hospital with him, just to dive COVID. My friend, my best friend, since the third grade had kidney failure. Left the hospital, signed herself out to go take care of some business, died on the bus ride back to the hospital. 30 years old. Tell me what they did to my mentor. My mama called me two weeks before she committed suicide in a back alley on the south side of Chicago. Four days before her birthday. Two days before I was Crown Miss Illinois. I was still working on through the rain and women of the waiting room at that time. I was sitting at work two blocks away from my foster mama's house. My son was supposed to spend the night the night before, but he stayed with me. He usually sleeps with her. I got a call that morning while I was at work, she passed away in her sleep. Her daughter, who was a really great friend of mine, like her sister to me. I was running for Miss Jetset USA. Every single day she was calling me, paying the money to put the votes for me. I called her one day to vote for me, and my cousin picked up the phone. She passed away. Six people. My nephew got killed on the street south side of Chicago. Mistaken identity. He left kids. But somehow I'm okay. I don't know what's gonna happen next week. But tonight I'm going to sleep. I don't know how this bill is getting paid. But I'm not going to destroy today worrying about Thursday. I don't know why they did what they did. But I'm not going to spend another six months begging somebody to give me closure. I don't know why God allowed that door to close. But I'ma trust that that closed door does not mean a closed future. I don't know how I'm going to rebuild. But I know I've rebuilt before. That's peace. Peace don't always say everything is okay. Sometimes peace says everything is not okay, but I will be. Come on, y'all. That's different. Everything is not okay, but I will be. Somebody put that in the comments. Every day is not okay, but I will be. The situation ain't fixed, but I will be. They haven't apologized, but I will be. The grief haven't disappeared, but I will be. My life don't look like how I planned it, but I will be, because my peace is no longer being held hostage by somebody else's outcome, by any outcome. And I think that's where some of us are right now. God ain't necessarily asking you to stop caring. He asking you to stop carrying what belongs to him. Because some of us are exhausted from working two jobs ours and God's job. You're trying to make people understand. You're trying to make somebody apologize. You're trying to control how people perceive you. You're trying to orchestrate every outcome. You're trying to figure out how God is gonna do what God said He was gonna do, baby. Give him his job back.

Even If Faith In Waiting

SPEAKER_00 50:32

God, I gave you, you know, I gave it back to you. I gave it back to you a little while ago. Your job is obedience. That's God's job, is outcome. Your job is stewardship, God's job is increase, your job is truth, God's job is vindication, your job is forgiveness, God's job is justice. You see how that works? Your job is taking the next step. God's job is to know where that road leads. And sometimes the most spiritual thing that you can say is, God, I I don't know. I don't know how this ends, I don't know when this changes, I don't know why this happened, I don't know what you're doing, but I trust you enough to stop demanding answers before I ever obey you. That's that's mature faith. Anybody can praise God when the check clear, my Jesus. I know I pray with the check clear, I ain't even gonna lie. We ain't gonna talk about it, but we're gonna talk about that's enough a praise for another time, amen. Anybody can shout when the report says healed. I know I did. Anybody can testify after the door is already open for them. But my thing is can you trust God in the waiting room? Can you trust God in the hallway? Can you trust God when one door closed and the next one ain't open yet? Can you trust God in between that? Can you trust God when the prayer ain't thank you for doing it, but I still believe you, even though you haven't done it yet. That's Shatterak, Meshach, and Abendigo. Daniel. They they they in Daniel 3, they tell the king, our God is able to deliver us. But then they say something that changed everything. But even if he does not, even if he does not, that's grown people's faith. Our God can, but even if he doesn't do what we want, we still ain't gonna bow. I need some, even if faith God can restore it. But even if he doesn't, I trust him. God can heal it, but even if he don't heal it the way that I prayed for him to, I trust him. God can reopen that door, but even if he doesn't, I trust him. God can make them apologize, but even if they never do, I'm still gonna heal. God can explain why, but even if I never understand, I'm not walking away from that's peace. It's not not certainty about certain circumstances, certainty about God. And maybe that is what Jesus was demonstrating in the boat. Everybody else was looking at the waves. Jesus was resting. Same boat, same storm, same water, different mindset, different posture. Oh, that's good. Same storm with a different posture. That might be my chapter title. So don't try to take it. Same storm with a different posture, and maybe that's the question. What posture does your faith take when the storm the storm starts? Do you panic immediately? Do you start trying to control everybody? Do you isolate? Do you self-destruct? Do you go back to old habits? Do you call people that God already told you to lead them people alone? He done had you delete the numbers, block them, here you go, unblocking them, calling them, and then wonder why your life back in chaos, why things start all of a sudden things was going good. Now it's back chaotic because you didn't allow these spirits to come back. He told you lead them people alone. Storms reveal where we run for safety. Some people run the alcohol, some people run the food, some people run the sex, some people run the shopping, some people run to relationships, some people run to work, some people run to a lot of y'all run the social media, some people run to isolation, some people run back to toxic people because familiar dysfunction feels safer than unfamiliar peace. But Psalm 46 says, God is our refuge and our strength and ever-present help in trouble. Refuge means this is where I run. Refuge. And sometimes peace begins when you change where you run. Not when the storm changes, when your refuge changes. Maybe you survived the storm. Maybe. Technically, it's over. You stopped using, the divorce was finalized, you moved, you rebuilt, you buried them. Years have passed. Everybody looks at you and thinks, she's she she she threw it. She went through it, but she got through it. But here's my question Did the storm leave you? Or did you leave the storm while carrying it inside of you? Because you can leave an abusive relationship and still wake up expecting somebody to hurt you. You can leave prison and mentally still live behind bars. You can stop struggling financially and still panic every time you spend $20. You can survive rejection and sabotage every healthy relationship because you're waiting for abandonment. You can survive chaos for so long that when peace finally comes, peace feels suspicious. Somebody know what I'm talking about. You prayed for peace, then peace came, and you didn't know what to do with it. Because chaos became familiar to you. So part three, we're gonna ask the a harder question. Not did you survive the storm, but did you learn how to stop living like it was still raining? I'm gonna play this video and then we're gonna come right back.

SPEAKER_01 57:37

Every raindrop tells a story. Some fall to plans, others to reveal. This is the story of a woman who stood in the storm and found revelation in the rain. She dreamed of this moment her whole life. To walk across that stage, to hear her name, to receive her document in the finish. A dream decades in the making. But as the applause echo, another storm was storming. He was powerful. Charismatic. A man of dog or social. Their connection began as ministry, but it soon turned into manipulation. What she thought was divine a line. Became a battlefield for her soul. The words came like thunder. Each one a deck. But instead of drowning in despair, she lifted her umbrella afraid and declared, no weapon against me shell. The pain revealed a power. The rejection revealed a word. And with divine praise, God, if He not the one, removed him. Not in anger, but in mercy. Through wise women of God, she found healing. They prayed. They hoped. And they reminded her. True love does not destroy. God's will does not belittle. She learned to set boundaries, protect her peace, and walk in freedom. Sis, you don't have to drown in someone else's wine. Let every drop of paint.

Coming Out Without Carrying It

SPEAKER_00 1:01:55

Welcome back to Listen Linda. Now, before the break, I left you all with a question, and I want to sit right there for a minute. It was, did you survive the storm? Now I can see that you survived. You're here, right? You're breathing, you're functioning, you went back to work, you raised, you raising the kids, or you raised the kids, you rebuilt the business, you moved into another house, you got into another relationship, you started another chapter. Everybody sees that you survived. Because, baby, there is a difference between coming out of the storm and the storm coming out of you. Amen. And that is where I think a lot of us get stuck. A lot of us. See, I'm one of those people that I can deal with people who have been through things. I deal with people all the time who have been through things. But to have someone come to you and say, I just got out of this. So that's how I know that you're doing this. So because someone else did that to you, you're projecting that onto me. Yeah, no. I don't get jiggy with stuff like that. Okay. You're still living in that. So now everybody you see, you want to say they're doing that to you. You're getting stuck. We celebrate survival as we should. But nobody tells you that sometimes survival teaches you behaviors that were necessary then but destructive now. Let me explain what I mean by that. Maybe you lived in an environment where you had to constantly watch people's moods. You can tell by how somebody closed the door, whether it was about to be a good night or a bad night. You can tell by the way somebody said your name. You could tell by the footsteps. You could tell by the silence. You learn to read a room before you ever learn to read a book. That skill may have protected you then. But now you're in a healthy environment and you're still reading everybody's face. What does that mean? Why did she say it like that? Why hasn't he texted me back? Why was her response so short? Is it something wrong? Are they mad at me? Nothing happened. But your body is preparing for something that's used to that happening. The storm ended. But inside of you, honey, inside of you, sweet lady, inside of you, sweet girl, it's still raining. You remember the lights being off. You remember the eviction notices. You remember opening the refrigerator and not seeing nothing in there. You remember your mama trying to stretch something until payday. You remember, remember hearing adults whisper about bills. Now God is blessing you, has blessed you, is blessing you. You're stable. You have money in the account. Your bills are paid. But every time you spend money, you panic. Every unexpected expense feels like catastrophe. You have enough, but your mind is still living in not enough. The storm ended, but it's still in you. It's still raining inside of you. Maybe somebody cheated. On you, lied to you, manipulated you, made you feel stupid for trusting them. And now somebody healthy comes along, they communicate, they're transparent, they show up, they're not hiding nothing, but you can't relax. You're checking, you're questioning, you're looking for any inconsistency. You're waiting for the other shoe to drop, and eventually you might create conflict or try to, because chaos feels more familiar than calm. Because here's something nobody talks about enough. When you've lived in chaos long enough, peace can feel suspicious. Peace can feel boring, peace can feel unfamiliar, peace can make you nervous because your mind says something is about to happen any minute now, any second. I just know something's about to happen. And sometimes nothing is about to happen. Sometimes nothing is happening, and that's the blessing. But you've been trained by storms to inspect thunder every time a cloud comes. That's why Romans 12 and 2 tells us, be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Notice that salvation and transformation aren't described as the exact same thing. You can love God and still need your mind renewed, honey. You can be saved and still have unhealthy patterns. You can know scripture. I know a guy seen a girl just recently. Know scripture like boom bam and still responds from old wounds. I just got out of this situation, so I know this is what's happening. No, baby, no, honey, no sweet girl. You can worship and still need to learn boundaries, you can pray and still need to unlearn survival behaviors because God can bring you out of Egypt, and Egypt can still be living in your thinking, still living right here, too. Look at the Israelites. God physically delivered them from slavery. They were not in Egypt anymore, but every time things got difficult in the wilderness, what did they say? Let's go back. Back to slavery.

unknown 1:08:53

Why? Why?

SPEAKER_00 1:08:55

Because bondage was familiar to them. And unfamiliar freedom can sometimes be scarier than familiar bondage. Somebody better hear me. Familiar doesn't mean safe. Familiar mean does not always mean healthy. Familiar does not mean God. Sometimes familiar just means I've learned how to survive here. And there are people who will return to dysfunction because at least they understand the rules of dysfunction. See, peace requires you to learn a new language. You don't have to fight every day, you don't have to prove yourself every day. You don't have to earn love every day. You don't have to chase everybody. You don't have to explain every boundary. You don't have to every accusation. You don't have to attend every argument that you are invited to. Sometimes somebody texts you or inbox you something crazy. If you know what peace sometimes looks like, read. Not making a Facebook post, not since everybody wants to act funny. No. Sometimes healing looks like looking at your phone, like I just did, and saying, I'm not going back into that storm. Because here's where we have to take responsibility.

Pursuing Peace With Boundaries

SPEAKER_00 1:10:50

But after God brings us out, we have a responsibility not to keep rebuilding the weather system. That might hurt. Because some of us have become so accustomed to survival that when life finally gets quiet for us, we want to create noise. Because quiet makes us uncomfortable. We'll call somebody we know we shouldn't be on the phone with. We'll pick a fight, we'll revisit an old situation, we'll stalk a page, we'll go looking for information that cannot possibly give us peace. We know when we're going over there to that page, it's gonna make us mad. Every storm isn't spiritual warfare. I've seen some of y'all go back and then, oh, it's a spiritual attack on my life. No, you walked back outside without an umbrella. Let's be let's hold ourselves accountable. You prayed God removed toxic people, He removed them, then you got lonely or you got bored. So, guess what you did? You went right to your unblocked list and you unblocked them, then you added them back. Now you're rebuking the devil again. The devil said, Leave me out of this one. No, ma'am. Sometimes peace requires discipline because peace isn't merely something God gives, peace is also something scriptures tells us to pursue. Now in Psalm 34, I can't remember what verse, go look for it. I know it's in 34. It says, seek peace and pursue it. I want to say it's 14. 34 and 14. Seek peace and pursue it. That means peace may require decisions, peace may require boundaries, peace may require changing that phone number of yours. Peace may require saying no and leave it at that. Peace may require leaving a group chat, peace may require unfollowing that messy person, peace may require forgiving somebody without reconciling with them. And let's stop right there because somebody needs this. Forgiveness does not automatically mean restored access. I have forgiven a lot of people for doing a lot of things to me. But asked someone last time they talked to. Whatever distance allows you to remain who God is calling you to be. And sometimes we keep reopening storms because we think being Christians means we that we shouldn't have boundaries. No, even Jesus withdrew from crowds, even Jesus didn't entrust himself to everybody. John John 2 says, Jesus knew what was in people. Discernment is not bitterness, wisdom is not unforgiveness. Boundaries that ain't revenge. Sometimes a boundary is simply saying, I know what happened to me when I stay here, and I'm no longer willing to pay that price. That's peace. Now let me take this somewhat deeper. Some storms don't only affect your behavior, they affect your identity. Something happened to you. And you eventually stop saying, I experienced this, and start saying, This is who I am. I experienced rejected. I experienced rejection, became I'm unwanted. I experienced abandonment, became everybody leaves me. See that power of the tongue. I experienced failure, became I'm a failure. I experienced abuse, became I'm damaged. Even I had a slip up earlier if you caught it. I went from saying I have lupus to I'm surviving lupus. Because power is in the tongue. I made terrible decisions, became I'm a terrible person. I went to prison, became I'm a criminal forever. I struggled with addiction, became that's all anybody ever will see. No, the storm is something you experience, it's not your name. 2 Corinthians 5 and 17 says, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come, the old one has gone, the new is here. That doesn't erase consequences, it doesn't erase memories, it doesn't mean you pretending nothing happened. It means what happened does not get to exclusively authoritize or to define who you become. Your worst day is not your name, your worst decision is not your name, your divorce is not divorce, is not your name, your addiction is not your name, your incarceration is not your name, your bankruptcy is not your name, your diagnosis is not your name, your trauma is not your name, your grief is not your name. You are a whole person who experienced something, and sometimes healing means learning to tell your story without crawling back inside of it. Oh, that one is good. Tell the story without crawling back inside of it. Because there's a difference between remembering and reliving. There are things I can talk about today that at one point I couldn't talk about without completely falling apart. That doesn't mean that they don't matter, it means that they don't have the same authority over me no more. That's healing, not forgetting, not pretending, not erasing, integration. This happened, it changed me. I learned from it, I carry scars from it, right? But it does not control the rest of my life. Isaiah 43, 18 through 19 says, forget the former things, do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing. I saw Lisa put that up today. Shout out to Lisa, Lisa Loming. I am doing a new thing. Now, people sometimes misuse that scripture. It doesn't mean develop amnesia, it doesn't mean don't dwell there. I mean, it does mean don't dwell there, don't build your house there, don't furnish the place, don't get mail delivered there. Visit memory when necessary, learn from it, honor what means honoring, grieve what needs grieving, but baby, you don't live there anymore. And I want to speak to somebody who's especially somebody who's grieving because grief is different, you don't get over somebody you love, and I don't like when people put timelines on grief. There are losses that permanently shape the shape, permanently change the shape of your life. You learn how to carry it differently. There will be days when you okay, then a smell, a song, a birthday, a holiday, a random Tuesday, and suddenly you're right back there emotionally. That doesn't mean you're failing. Grief isn't linear, but even in grief, peace can begin growing around the pain, not replacing the love, not erasing the person, but making room for life to continue for you. Psalm thirty-four and eighteen says, the Lord is close to the broken heart. The Lord is close to the broken heart, and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Close. Because sometimes when your heart is broken, you don't need somebody preaching at you, you need presence, and scripture says God comes close, not get over it, not you should be better by now. Close, and maybe finding peace means discovering that you can miss somebody and still laugh, you can grieve and still build, you can remember and still move forward, you can honor what was without refusing what still can be because surviving something don't mean your life is now required to become a memorial to what happened. You are still allowed to live. Somebody needs permission to live again. You are allowed to enjoy yourself, you're allowed to travel, you're allowed to fall in love, you're allowed to build something, you're allowed to laugh until your stomach hurt, you're allowed to celebrate, you're allowed to have a good day without feeling guilty about it. Because sometimes tragedy, once somebody goes through something traumatic or they have a tragedy, joy feels like you're betraying the person that you're grieving. It's not. Your joy does not dishonor what you lost. Your joy doesn't mean it didn't matter, your peace doesn't mean that you forgot. Sometimes peace is actually proof that love survived the storm, too. Now I want to talk to the woman who says, but Dr. Jaclyn Cox, I don't even know what peace feels like. That's real. If chaos has been your normal since childhood, you may not even recognize peace. If you've always been responsible for every single person in your life, rest can feel irresponsible. It can feel like you're not doing nothing. If you've always had to defend yourself, silence can feel like you're weak. If you've always had to hustle, slowing down can feel dangerous. If your love has always hurt, healthy love can feel fake. I've seen people get on social media and see two people in love, and they not arguing, they not fighting, they not going through no chaos, or they being fake for social media. That's fake. They fake. They are healed and healthy love. And this is why peace has to be learned.

Learning Peace When Chaos Feels Normal

SPEAKER_00 1:23:51

Because Jesus says in Matthew 11, Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Then he says, Learn from me. Learn. Maybe rest has to be learned. Maybe peace has to be practiced. Maybe you are not bad at peace. Maybe you're just new to it. Give yourself grace while you learn. Learn that every phone call is not bad news. And if it's good news, let it be good news without trying to turn it into something bad. Learn that everybody ain't leaving. Learn that saying no does not make you mean. Learn that rest doesn't make you lazy. Learn that you don't have to earn every good thing. Sometimes somebody can just give you something. Learn that not everybody wants something from you. Learn that somebody can love you without hurting you first. Learn that a quiet house can just be a quiet house. Not the calm before another storm, just calm. And this is why finding peace in the storm became so heavy on my heart the other day. Because last time we talked about coming through the rain. We wrote two books about it. Me and all these wonderful ladies. Two books. We talked about coming through the rain. And it was it was something. One was the devotional anthology, the other one was the actual anthology. But this time, I don't only want to know what happened to you, I want to know what happened in you. Where did God meet you? What did you have to unlearn? What did you have to surrender? What version of yourself could not come with you? What did peace cost you? Because peace cost you some things. It may cost you relationships, it may cost you access, it may cost you being understood, it may cost you the need to be right, it may cost your addiction to chaos, it may have cost you the version of yourself that everybody else is comfortable with. And some people they they gonna say, you changed. Yes. My God, yes, that was the prayer. I was supposed to change. I didn't survive all of that to come out exactly the same way I used to be. I didn't pray all those prayers to remain the same. I didn't cry all those tears to remain the same. I didn't learn all those lessons to keep choosing the same people, the same patterns, the same reactions, and the same cycles. Yes, I changed. And maybe that's what the storm produced. Not because the storm itself was good, but because God refused to let it leave me empty-handed. I came out with discernment, I came out with boundaries, I came out with compassion, I came out with wisdom, I came out knowing who actually loves me. I came out knowing what matters, I came out knowing what I will never tolerate again. I came out knowing I can start over. I came out knowing God can hold me when everything else falls apart. And baby, guess what? I came out knowing and loving me. Yes, I changed. I changed. Maybe for the first time. So before we go into our final segment, I want to ask you for. Something not publicly, you don't have to post it, you don't have to tell nobody just you and God. But if you want to leave it in the comment, you can where in your life are you still responsible for or responding to rain that stopped a long time ago? Where are you still bracing? Where are you still hiding? Where are you still fighting? Where are you expecting abandonment? Where are you still pushing new new people for what old people did? You still punishing the new people for what the old people did. Where are you still identifying yourself by something God already brought you through? And then ask, God, teach me. Well, God, can you teach me what peace looks like here, where I am right now? Not fake peace, not avoidance, not pretending, not suppressing the real peace. The kind Philippians says, guard your heart in mind, the kind Jesus had in the boat, the kind that don't require perfect weather, because the greatest testimony ain't I survived the storm. Maybe it's the storm happened, and sometimes somehow it didn't turn me into the storm. Don't let who hurt you turn you into somebody who hurts everybody else. Don't let betrayal make you incapable of trusting. Don't let rejection make you cruel. Don't let abandonment make you controlling. Don't let poverty make you worship money. Don't let abuse make you believe love always hurts. Don't let loss convince you that there is something left to live for. Don't let the storm reproduce itself through you. It stops here. The fear stops here. Dysfunction stops here. Chaos stops here. The cycle stops here. And peace it starts here. Now we're gonna come back for part four after this break. Okay, and we're gonna bring all of this together because maybe you're wondering why does my testimony matter? Why tell it? Why reopen something I find hard to survive? Why put words around something that still makes me emotional? I want to be careful with this next part. I'm not going to tell you God hurt you just so you could help somebody else. No. But I am gonna show you what God can do with a storm. He refused to let waste you. Because your storm may not have been just for you, but your testimony can become somebody else's evidence that the storm is survivable. And that, my friends, is where we are going next. Right after this break.

SPEAKER_05 1:31:29

We've been wanting to try to hold it all together.

Turning Scars Into Testimony

SPEAKER_00 1:34:45

Welcome back to Listen Linda. We are in our final segment, and I want to bring this whole conversation home. Now, part one, we established something important. You can be in the will of God and still encounter a storm. In part two, we dealt with those seasons when you're praying, you're crying, you're believing, and it still feels like God is sleeping through your emergency. Then in part three, I asked you what may be the hardest question of this entire show. Did you learn how to stop living like it was still raining? Because getting out of the storm is one thing. Getting the storm out of you is a whole nother. But now I want to ask one more question. What do you do with the story after you've survived it? What do you do with the scars? What do you do with the lessons? What do you do with the wisdom that cost you something to keep? What do you do with the part of your life you spent years wishing you never had that it never happened? And I want you to be extremely careful here. I will never tell somebody God did that terrible thing to you because somebody needs to hear your testimony. No. I don't believe we need to make God the author of every tragedy in order to believe that God is capable of redeeming tragedy. There's a difference. What happened may have been wrong. What happened may have been somebody else's decision. What happened may have been devastating. What happened may have changed your life forever. But one thing that I've learned about God is He is a master at refusing to let broken pieces be wasted. Romans 8 and 28, it tells us that God works in all things for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose. Again, it doesn't say everything is good, it says God can work in any and everything. That's redemption. And sometimes redemption just sounds like, I wish it wouldn't have happened to me. What happened to me on I wouldn't wish what happened to me on anybody. But since I survived it, I'm gonna make sure what I learned doesn't die with me. Now that is a testimony. Some people are afraid to heal because pain has become the evidence that what happened mattered. You know how many times I hear people, and the first thing that they say is especially on these podcasts, they say, My name is so-and-so and so-and-so. And I have been through boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. I am boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. This happened to me, that happened to me. Look at me. I need you to see that this happens to me. No, no, you don't have to bleed forever to prove that you were wounded. Some people are afraid to heal because pain has become the evidence that what happened mattered, especially grief. You think if I laugh again, did I love them enough? If I move forward, am I leaving them behind? If I'm not angry anymore, does that mean what they did to me was okay? If I stop talking about it, will people forget what happened? No, healing does not invalidate your story, nor does it invalidate history. You do not have to bleed forever to prove you were wounded, you don't have to remain angry to prove that they hurt you. You don't, you don't have to stay broken to prove that loss was real. You don't have to sabotage your future to honor your past. Healing says it happened, it mattered, it changed me, but it won't own the rest of my life. And sometimes that's the testimony. Not that God put everything back exactly as it was. Maybe he didn't. Maybe some things can never go back. Maybe there are people who are never coming back, maybe there are relationships that should never be restored. Maybe there are years you can never recover, maybe there are consequences that you still live with. But restoration does not always mean returning to the old version. Sometimes restoration means God builds something new with what remains, like Isaiah 61. Um it talked about beauty for ashes. Ashes means something already burned. You cannot put ashes back together and make the original thing. Think about that. When scripture talks about beauty for ashes, it doesn't say God reconstructs what burned exactly the way it was. It says He gives something else, He gives beauty for your ashes. Maybe you've been asking God to rebuild that old thing, and God is trying to introduce you to something new. Maybe you've been praying, God make me who I was before, and God is saying, I didn't carry you through all of this and all of that to return you to who you were before. Maybe you're not supposed to become her again, maybe she was wonderful. Love her, but she didn't know what you know now. She didn't have your discernment, she didn't have your boundaries, she didn't know how strong she was. She hadn't met the version of God you met in the valley. You have so stop asking God to rewind. Maybe he's saying, come forward. Yo, testimony don't have to be pretty. Now let's talk about testimony because somewhere along the way we made testimony too pretty. We think testimony has to sound like I went through a difficult season, but through prayer and press perseverance, God brought me through. Okay. But what happened? Tell me the story. Were you mad? Did you quit? Did you relapse? Did you go back? Did you call somebody you wasn't supposed to call? Did you sit in the parking lot because you couldn't make yourself walk inside the house? Did you pray and hear nothing? Did you stop praying? Did you question God? Did you have to start over four times? Did you lose friends? Did you lose money? Did you lose your reputation? Did you have to admit I helped create some of this mess? Because sometimes that's the part of the testimony, too. Every storm ain't something somebody did to us. Some storms came from decisions that we made. Come on now, y'all. Help me. And grace still met us there. That's why grace is grace. If you could earn it by always making perfect decisions, it wouldn't be grace. Somebody's testimony is God rescued me from what happened to me. Somebody else's testimony is God rescued me from what I kept doing to myself. And both people can have a seat at the table. Look at the woman at the well in John 4. Jesus meets this woman carrying a complicated history. And after her encounter with him, she leaves her water jar, goes back into town, and says, Come see a man who told me everything I ever did. And people came because she told them. She didn't go to seminary first, she didn't build a platform first, she didn't become perfect first. She had an encounter and she told somebody. After that, the man wants to go with Jesus. And Jesus tells him, No, instead, go home to your own people and tell them how much the Lord has done for you. Go tell it. Why?

unknown 1:44:35

Why?

SPEAKER_00 1:44:36

Because somebody knows who you used to be. And when they see who you are now, they can't argue with transformation. That's why some people won't understand your testimony. They didn't meet you in the storm, they met you after. They see the business. They didn't see the bankruptcy. They see the marriage. They didn't see the heartbreak. Or in my situation, the single parent with a lot of heartbreaks. They didn't see the degree. I mean, they see the degree, but they didn't see the night you almost quit school or the time I quit three times. They didn't see the ministry. You know, they saw the ministry, but they didn't see you questioning God. They see you smiling, but they don't know what it cost you to smile again. They see the book. They don't know some of those pages were paid for in tears. They see the confidence, but they didn't meet the version of you who couldn't look herself in the mirror. And that's why I keep saying stop comparing finished chapters to somebody else's rough draft. You don't know what it costs them to become who you're looking at. Your story does not require everybody's approval. And let me free somebody from something else. Everybody ain't gonna like your testimony, especially if they appear in it. Maybe that's a word that's a whole different podcast though. But hear me, there's a difference between telling your truth and using your story as a weapon. Your testimony should never be revenge. Your testimony should never be revenge. That is dangerous. Okay? You shouldn't use your testimony to weaponize it against somebody. Your healing should never require humiliating somebody else, no matter how bad they did you. You don't need to expose every name, you don't need to prove every detail to strangers, you don't need to turn your testimony into a courtroom. Sometimes maturity says, I can tell what happened to me without make without making destroying you the purpose of telling it. That's peace too. Because when you still need the person who hurt you to be publicly destroyed before you can feel healed, they still have too much power over you. Sometimes healing is says God can deal with you. I'm gonna deal with me. That, my friends, is freedom. Now, Psalm 37 tells us to trust God and not fret because of evildoers. Romans 12 tells us not to take revenge, but to leave room for God's justice. That means I don't have to become judge, jury, prosecutor, detective, Facebook, investigative, reporter all at the same time. I can tell my story, I can own my truth, I can tell the truth, own my part, protect what needs to be protected, and release the outcome. Somebody needs to know you made it. There is something powerful about being able to say, I made it. Not I made it perfectly, not I made it without scars, not I never doubted, not I never cried, just I made it. And somebody needs to hear that from you. Because sometimes people can hear from the person who has never been where they are. You can quote scripture, Miss Lady, to somebody in prison. But when somebody who has been incarcerated says, baby, I know that door sounds like what is what that door sounds like when it closes. And I also know that your life is not over. That hits way different than what you could ever preach about. You could preach about addiction. But when somebody says, I know what that's like to wake up ashamed of what I did the night before, and I'm standing here sober today, that hits different. You can talk about grief, but when a mother who has buried a child sits besides another grieving mother, sometimes she doesn't even need words. Her presence is testimony. You can preach about leave and abuse, but when somebody who once believes she never gets out says, I got out, I rebuilt, I learned how to breathe again, that woman here's possibility. You could talk about homelessness, but when somebody like me says, I know what it's like. Not to know where I'm gonna sleep at. And today I have keys in my hand. Possibility. That's what testimony gives people. Possibility. It says, maybe this is not the end. Maybe I can recover. Maybe God has not forgotten me. Maybe there's life after this. Maybe peace is still available to me.

Invitation To Share Your Story

SPEAKER_00 1:50:31

And that brings me back to through the rain. Because this is where I want to mention something that's been going on behind the scenes. Okay. I really want to talk about this. I'm trying to bring it up for y'all right now. Okay. Give me a second. I'm gonna bring this up for y'all. So I'm trying to kind of get it. Okay. Right here. So I've been working on this behind the scenes, okay? It's not um turning this into another hour-long commercial. That's not what this conversation is. But I want to say that this message and what's happening with Through the Rain Volume 2, Finding Peace in the Storm, they are definitely connected because they are. Last year, we released the Through the Rain project. We did the anthology, which is here, right? Both covers I made on Canva myself. And then Through the Rain Devotional Anthology. Okay. We had women from all over the world willing to open up their lives and tell the truth about what they had survived. So we did a two-part series for this book, um, connected to those conversations. In both books, they went on to become international bestsellers. I'm grateful for that, I am. But hear me, the ranking that wasn't the miracle. The miracle was that women stopped hiding. The miracle was that somebody opened a book and found language for something that she thought she was experiencing by herself. The miracle was that somebody saying, That's me. And now God brought me back to the rain. But this time, the question feels different. Volume one asked in many ways, what did you come through? Right? This time I'm asking, where did you find peace? Where was God when everything was falling apart? What happened when he didn't answer the way that you wanted him to? How did you rebuild? What did you have to unlearn? How did you stop living like it was still raining? How did you learn to trust again? How did you forgive yourself? How did you surrender the outcome? How did you become the woman standing here today? That's what I want to know. And we're currently prayerfully considering women for this. Not everybody who applies will be selected. Does not mean that your story does not matter. Not everybody who attends the informational session will become a co-op. Okay? Because I don't want 10 versions of the same testimony. I want a book where somebody can open it, carrying grief and find herself. Somebody can open it after addiction and find herself. Somebody can open it after incarceration and find herself. Somebody can open it after abuse and find herself. Somebody can open it after failure, after losing everything, after having to begin again, and somewhere inside those pages say, if God met me there, maybe he'll meet me here. That's the assignment. And if hearing this stirred up something in you, don't ignore it. I'm not telling you that means you're supposed to be in this anthology. Take it to God. Pray. Because maybe your testimony belongs in a book. Maybe it belongs in a conversation with your daughter. Maybe it belongs in your church. Maybe it belongs in a support group. Maybe it belongs in a journal for now. Maybe you're not ready to tell it publicly yet. That's okay too. You don't owe the world access to a wound God is still healing. Please hear that. Don't let anybody pressure you into premature vulnerability. There's a time to heal privately, and there's a time to testify publicly. Ask God which season you're in. But whatever you do, don't confuse shame with privacy. If you're silent because God told you to protect something, that's wisdom. But if you're silent because you're convinced nobody could love you if they knew, that's shame. And shame has kept enough people quiet. So here we are. At the end of our four-part conversation. Let's see. We are at the end of our four-part conversation. And maybe your storm is happening right now. I can't promise you when it ends. I can't promise you everything goes back to normal. I can't promise everybody stays. I can't promise you'll understand why. But I can remind you what Jesus said. He said, let us go over to the other side. And I can remind you what Isaiah said. When you pass through the waters, I will be with you. I can remind you what David said. Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Notice that word again. Through, not build a house in it, not die in it, not become it through. Psalms 30 and 5 reminds us that weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning. Philippians tells us peace can guard our hearts. Psalms 46 tells us God is present in trouble. 2 Corinthians tells us his grace, ooh, that's my favorite one. His grace is sufficient. Romans tells us he can work in all things. And Jesus demonstrates that the peace in the presence of a storm does not require the absence of peace. So maybe tonight you don't need God to explain the storm. Maybe you need to ask, God, teach me how to find you here. And maybe that's where peace begins. Not when the waves stop, not when the clouds disappear, not when everything makes sense, but when you realize I'm not in this boat alone. And if Jesus is in that boat, maybe the storm it doesn't get the final word. It just don't.

Closing Prayer And Charge

SPEAKER_00 1:57:56

Before we close today, I want to pray with you. Not a cute prayer, not a polished prayer, right? I want to pray for the person who is tired, the person who faith has stretched, the person who has been pretending to be okay, the person who has been asking God how much longer. Not sleepy, but so tired, Lord God. Tired of caring it, tired of explaining it, tired of being strong, tired of everybody assuming they are okay because they keep showing up. You know the storm they haven't told anybody about. You know the tears that didn't make it to social media. You know the prayers they stopped praying because disappointment started hurting too much. You know the questions that they're almost afraid to ask you. And God, I'm asking you to meet them right there. Not the cleaned up version, not the church version. Meet them in the confusion, meet them in the anger, meet them in the grief, meet them in the fear, meet them in the waiting room, Lord God. Meet them in that house, meet them in that hospital room, meet them in the car, meet them on that night shift, meet them in that prison, meet them in that empty bedroom, meet them in the place where they keep asking, God, do you still see me? Remind them, Lord God, that you do. God, for every person who is trying to control everything because they're terrified of what happens if they let go. Give them the courage to surrender, Lord God. For the person who came out the storm but is still living like it's raining. Teach them peace. Teach them that quiet doesn't always mean danger is coming. Teach them that rest is not laziness. Teach them that boundaries are not cruelty. Teach them that healing is not betrayal. Teach them that joy after grief is not disrespect. Teach them that they are allowed to live again. For the person that's carrying shame about their past, Lord God. Remind them that they are their worst chapter, and it does not get to name their entire book. For the person who made the mistake, for the person who went back, for the person who relapsed, for the person who knew better and still did it, let grace meet them without allowing grace to become an excuse to remain there. Give them strength to get back up, Lord God. God protect the person who is still physically inside a dangerous storm. Give them wisdom, give them safe people, give them resources, give them courage, open doors, make a way of escape where one is needed. And for every person who is grieving somebody that they can never get back, God come close. Your word says you are close to the brokenhearted. So be close. When words are not enough, be close. When people don't understand, be close. When another anniversary comes, be close. When the memory hits unexpectedly, Lord God, be close. And God, take every piece we thought was wasted, every tear, every lesson, every scar, every closed door, every beginning again, every moment we thought, I cannot do this. And show us what redemption looks like. Not because everything that happened wasn't good was good, but because you are good, Lord God. Give us peace that doesn't make sense. Peace before the answer, peace before the apology, peace before the breakthrough, peace before the storm stops. And when the waves rise again, Lord God, remind us we've seen you in storms before. We know where our help comes from. We know where our refuge is. We know who is in this boat. And we trust you even here, even now, even in this, in Jesus' mighty name. Amen. Before I go, I want you to remember this. Peace is proof that the storm is no longer and no longer has the right to control you. If this episode found you in a hard place, sit with it. Pray over it. Share with somebody who needs it. And if you feel God stirring in your testimony, don't ignore that either. Your story may be the confirmation somebody else has been praying for. And yes, Through the Rain Volume 2, Finding Peace in the Storm is currently in the application stage. I'm prayerfully selecting women who have real stories of faith, survival, healing, and peace. And if that's you, the application information will be in the comments. And it's on my page, it's pinned to the top on my Facebook page. And before I let y'all go, don't forget, I will be back live in 15 minutes to do. Let's end this on the on a fun note. I'll be back to do the raffle. Okay.

Raffle Details And Sign-Off

SPEAKER_00 2:04:01

So I'll be back live at 7 p.m. Central Standard Time for the Listen Linda magazine cover raffle. Every entry is $99, and one person will win the full cover package valued at $7.99, including the cover, a six-page feature, complimentary AI photo shoot, and a rollout video. That's right. That means if you don't have pictures that you feel is good enough or quality enough for the magazine, which we only accept HP 1080p photos, okay. Um we do give a complimentary AI photo, no revisions, okay. And the rollout video. So that 15-second video that introduces that you're on the cover, that AI twin video, that comes with it as well. And nobody loses. Every person who enters and does not win the cover still receives a two-page magazine feature. So the cutoff is actually one minute from now. It's at 6 45. Okay. So I don't want y'all talking about can I still get in at 7 o'clock? Okay. So I will see y'all at 7. I've been on here for two hours. I was only supposed to be on here for an hour, but God gave me a word. And so when God gives you a word, you have to be obedient. I love y'all like Christ love the church, and I am out.

SPEAKER_03 2:05:26

See y'all in about 15 minutes.