5 Secrets for Beating the Sunday Anxiety for Teachers

Beating the Sunday Scaries: 5 Game-Changing Tips for Teachers

That pit in your stomach on Sunday afternoon? You're not alone. As educators, we've ALL felt that weekend-ruining anxiety creeping in. But here's the truth: you don't have to live with the Sunday Scaries forever. In this episode, I'm sharing my battle-tested strategies that helped me transform my weekends from dread-filled to rejuvenating.

🎯 In This Episode You'll Discover:

• 💡 Why it's NOT "just teaching" - the surprising truth about Sunday anxiety across all professions
• 📚 The "Friday Power Hour" strategy that can completely transform your weekend peace of mind
• 📱 How your tech habits might be sabotaging your weekend (and the simple fixes you need)
• 🌟 The counter-intuitive approach to weekend plans that actually helps you rest better
• ⏰ My game-changing "Sunday at 7" method that freed me from constant work anxiety
• 🎁 BONUS TIP: The "Monday Micro-Joy" technique that makes the week ahead less daunting

💪 Key Takeaways:

Stop letting Sunday anxiety rob you of weekend joy and Monday energy. These practical strategies will help you set boundaries, protect your peace, and show up as your best self for your students.

Want to truly thrive in teaching without sacrificing your personal life?
Check out my signature on-demand course, Balance Your Teacher Life. You can go the self-study route or join a cohort with group coaching for Summer 2025.

Check out all the details here: www.gracestevens.com/balance

📘 My latest (and greatest!) book:
The Empowered Teacher Toolkit
Check out the best-selling Positive Mindset Habits for Teachers book here
Beat Teacher Burnout with Better Boundaries book here

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Transcript

Okay, teacher friends, here we go. This week we're talking about something that is so painful and yet we don't talk about it enough and not acknowledging that it is really a thing amongst teachers, educators, especially this time of year when things get so overwhelming, makes us feel very isolated. We think we're the only people it happens to and it's not true.

And what am I talking about? Oh, I'm talking about what I used to call the Sunday night blues, but I got to tell you there were times in my teaching career it wasn't even Sunday night blues. It was an anxiety, a kind of dread pit in my stomach that would start Really, before I even got out of bed on Sunday, it would just rob my weekend of joy.

And I'd be so frustrated with myself and to be honest, ashamed about it. And I worked really hard on it and today, you know, obviously it wasn't always great, but there were times in my career where it was much better than others because I was proactive about it. managing it and here are my absolute five best secrets for dealing with it and also a bonus tip and I gotta tell you some of the beginning ones you're like yeah yeah yeah we know that but you know I think four and five are really going to be game changers for you if you give them a chance.

So in this week's episode the top five secrets for beating the Sunday Scarys, the Sunday Blues, whatever you want to call them. Cannot wait to tell you the tips. I know they can make a difference for you.  See you on the inside. Welcome to the Balance Your Teacher Life podcast where we talk all things avoiding educator burnout, setting healthy boundaries, and achieving better work life balance. 

If you're passionate about education but tired of it consuming your whole life, you have found your home in the podcast universe. I'm your host Grace Stevens and let's get going with today's show. 

Sometimes I like to start with a story. I need to tell you a story about the Sunday Scaries. You know what they are. Again, sometimes we call them the Sunday Blues, the Sunday Scaries, that feeling of dread. Like you just, gosh, being so frustrated that you can't really be present with your family or your activities.

Like, you know, that feeling when you You're so excited for the weekend. All seems like once Wednesday hits, you're just like, Oh, is it the weekend? I'm living for the weekend. And then when the weekend comes, you're so stinking exhausted. Like you feel like you really don't do anything to fill yourself up.

It's like this big battle just to get the laundry done, the Target run in, the groceries, the kids to their you know, activities, all that stuff. And get some grading done, get some lesson planning done. And before you know it, you know, it's Sunday and you've got this. stomachache like the weekend's almost over and I haven't done anything to fill myself up and you just have like I said this kind of low level dread maybe you don't know that's what it is but something isn't quite right with you and many teachers live their whole lives this way and it's completely unhealthy super stressful and it's just yeah it's bad for our mental emotional and indeed our physical health Especially when we're not sleeping well.

Can damage our relationships when we're not present with our family and we're snappy with them, like they're not getting our best selves because we are just too overwhelmed and anxious. So, alright, all that you know, what the heck we gonna do about it? Because this is, you know, what I'm interested in is empowering you and giving you the skills.

Okay, so let me give you the five tips and then there's gonna be a bonus at the end. So, number one.  And this I do know for experience.  Number one is to keep it in perspective is not just teaching. Okay. I had a corporate career that brought me to my knees. And, you know, you might think, Oh, well, in teaching, you know, we don't get paid enough.

We don't get enough respect,  all the things I'm telling you, I had a job where I got played. Plenty. Honest to goodness,  I made a very, very lucrative living. At the end of the day, it didn't make any difference to me. I was so stressed, overwhelmed, disconnected from my family, anxious, didn't feel what I did had purpose.

What does it matter, right? And I lived in the Sunday scaries all the time. And that was one of the reasons I left. And when I got into teaching, you know, I thought teaching was magical. And if you know my story, you know, within a couple of years without being cognizant and paying attention and intentional, you know, I found myself in the same spot, but for a lot less money. 

So it wasn't the job that needed to change. It was me, my perspective and my skill sets. Right. So. Every permission, every, not every, yeah, most, honest to goodness, most people who have a career or a profession, if they're not careful, can have the Sunday scaries. My husband worked in car rental, he had the Sunday night blues.

It was terrible. I remember we would always try and walk the dogs on a Sunday night and that walk got earlier and earlier and earlier because I could see his whole being changed and so just let yourself know that you gotta learn the skills. Yes teaching is getting harder and harder but letting it consume your weekend  is something that you have to learn to control.

Because if not, you will just, you know, maybe you'll say, Oh, some things, you know, that some things are easier than teaching. Of course, lots of things are easier and less stressful than teaching. But if you don't have the skill set, then the mindset, you're going to create the same situation for yourself.

Okay. So maybe that will give you some relief that Sunday Scaries is not only. For teachers, lots of people feel them. It's kind of like a lifestyle epidemic. We have this very achievement oriented, you know, society that we live in and piled on top of that is this social media where you're seeing all these things or that you perceive other people are living this amazing life and doing all these wonderful things on the weekend while you are just trying to, you know, keep your head above water.

You know. None of that necessarily is true. Okay. So number one is not just teaching.  Okay. So hopefully that makes you feel better if you had another job and you didn't learn the skills, you'd have the same problem. So let's learn the skills. Okay. So number two, something that has always helped me, even though on Fridays we are exhausted, I would Always try and do as much as possible on Fridays before I got home because to be honest once I got home I hit the couch.

I mean, it's not like oh, I can't wait to get home on Friday I'm gonna go out and have my best life. We're exhausted. At best we're ordering takeout Right and just laying on the couch. So I used to try and do as much as I could on Friday  And that was two parts. One was certainly at least have Monday planned.

Now I worked for a school where we had early release on Fridays, but then they were almost always consumed with meetings and other things. But I would try For sure, I had a little bit of flexibility in my schedule, even if I meant school, leaving school 20 minutes later, I wouldn't leave until Monday, was kind of organized.

I had made this checklist for myself and I completely encourage you to do the same. Make a Monday checklist, maybe have it laminated. Make it digital if that's more your style, you know, whatever, so that you know, here are the things I need to have on Monday. I mean, you know, I was, I taught littles. I needed a new word wall.

I needed the new spelling words. I need, you know, all the things. So I'd make the copies and at least have Monday planned so that I didn't have to worry about it over the weekend, right?  Ideally, sure, I would love to have all my copies for the week ahead made and all that stuff. But you know, I live in the real world.

At least Monday I wanted planned. So that on the weekend if I had to worry about it, I would say no, Monday is taken care of. You know, I can take care of the rest later. But I would make sure that before I left school, the mission critical stuff that I needed for Monday was done. My parent newsletter, my spelling words to send home, you know, whatever.

Whatever that thing is for you, make a list, run through it, and try and have it done before you leave. And then on the way home on Friday, whatever I had energy for, I would do. Whether it was the Target run, whether it was grocery shopping, I know, oh my gosh, we just want to get home, but the grocery store on a Saturday morning, like it takes up half your day, right?

It's busier and everything else. So I would just try and do as much stuff as I could on Friday before I got home. And then we always had a tradition on Friday night was, you know, pizza or takeout or something, right? Something that was low key that we could just kind of chill on Fridays. Okay, so that's number one.

Do as much on Friday as possible. Okay, get it off your, leave your desk clear, or at least with a big stick note, here's two things, mission critical, I need to do Monday morning. But try and get Monday taken care of, right? So you can just not worry about it over the weekend. You know, depending on how long you've been teaching. 

You know, I could just pick up my rhythm, turn it off and then turn it on again when I unlock the door. Now, here's the other thing. If we're not physically bringing work home with us, right? Like, okay, the lessons are planned, the copies are made. Here's the problem. Here's where you get that stomachache a lot of the time is the emotional labor.

Emotionally, we are bringing it home. We're bringing home the stress, we're worrying about students, we're replaying over in our mind the parent phone calls that, you know, all the things. And so  my tip number three is as much as possible set yourself up for success from a technology standpoint. What does this mean?

It means don't bring your stupid laptop home. Okay, just don't bring it home. If you bring it home, leave it in the garage until you need it. That's going to be number, number five. I'm going to tell you a strategy for that, but just don't bring it in the house. Take your school email off your phone.  Just do it.

Your class communication app that is on your phone.  Set silent hours. Okay, you know I loved ClassDojo, I always, you know, I loved having it on my phone. I found it an excellent tool. It saved me so much time in so many ways. But there's nothing worse than seeing that notification that a parent sent you something or a student sent you something and now you want to know what's happening on the weekend.

You know, for them, they're in the same spot. They're just doing it on the weekend. Because that's when they have time and that's when they think of it. Doesn't mean because they're communicating with you on the weekend, they're expecting an immediate reply.  Hopefully you've done a good job of setting and managing expectations on back to school or whenever that, you know, you do not answer.

Communication outside of Certain hours. Okay. But maybe the fact that they're still doing it is just because that's when it's convenient for them or they're thinking about it, okay? But every time you see that ding or that notification on your phone, it's kind of this, it drags you back in, right? You might have been thinking about something else, been engaged in something else, but it drags you back in.

Okay? So manage the  technology, make sure that you do not  get. disturbed and pulled back into school mode from external influences. Okay. And a lot of that has to do with the technology. So manage that, be proactive, take control. Okay. All of these things are about taking what the first one was mindset, but doing as much as you can on Friday, managing their technology that is completely within your control. 

All right. So number one is Perspective, mindset. It's not just teaching.  Number two, try and have, you know, Monday needs to be set up before you leave on Friday, so you're not worrying about it, right? Number three is managing the technology. So you're not,  you know, the emotional labor, you're not kind of dragged back in to school mode.

Okay. So this is number four.  One of the most important things we can do on the weekend. And when we have a break is to rest and to reset. Okay. Right? And to do that, we need to do something different.  Laying on the couch in survival mode and vegging out, you know, has its place,  but it's not true rest, it's not reset.

That's survival. That's not kind of filling your bucket. You know what I'm saying? And you might feel you're too exhausted for anything else. But what will really energize you is actually doing something different. different than teaching with people who are not talking about school or parents. Okay, so make plans for the weekend.

I know it sounds counterintuitive when you're so tired, but actually have some kind of plans, not too many, don't be over scheduled. And certainly many of us are in that season of life where our plans were maybe made for us because they revolve around our kids.  My daughter was in dance for years and our weekends were already set.

Rehearsals and this and that. But I still managed to make plans and maybe my plan was just to, oh gosh, for one whole season,  I was making a quilt by hand. I was so happy, just take my little pieces of fabric with me to do something different. But for years, my standard practice was to have a standard riding date. 

Cycling date. with a friend of mine. Okay, and we would go out and that filled two buckets, right? My social bucket, I would see a friend, we would talk, we would have coffee afterwards, and also like my kind of exercise, be outside, nature bucket. Right? Like it was a twofer, right? Maybe you could schedule a walk with someone.

Or a high five. Hiking's not your thing. Just even a walk. Being outside, doing something with somebody. I'll tell you why it worked for me. Because if I promised myself I'd go for a bike ride by myself or go to the gym, it was really easy for me to talk myself out of it.  Like really easy. Like things needed to be perfect.

Right? The temperature needed to be perfect. Like everything.  But if I already knew, I'd already told a friend, hey I'll meet you at 8am, we'll ride. Like, I'm not going to let that person down. I'm not. Right? So, and it really worked for me on that.  level and it really worked for me on the level that it was something completely different than what I usually did and we had different interests and we talked about different things and it was very helpful for me.

We honestly, you know, I,  maybe some of you have some religious practices, you go to church. For me, you know, being outside is when I feel really connected and refreshed and so I would always make sure that I had at least one thing on the weekend scheduled ahead of time so a standing date was, you know ideal because it filled more than one bucket.

It got me some exercise, it got me outside, it got some social activity, right? So, and then I actually felt like I did something on my weekend. Because that's when you feel awful when, you know, like I said, it's so easy to get caught up into looking at social media and thinking, oh, this person did this, and this person did that, and I did nothing.

And you don't need to do it to post it on social media. I'm just saying, get out of your own head that you didn't do anything. Which, if you're not careful, your weekends can get consumed just with chores in trying to catch up on some sleep. But when you have this low level anxiety hitting your stomach the whole time,  it just robs you of your whole weekend.

And to be honest, you know, I think I've been very honest in the past about my own struggles with anxiety. For me, you know, a lot of anxiety is very, very hard. Very physical. It's a feeling in my body. And so when I would ride my bike and we would have a pretty, maybe it was about 16 miles the route we would do, but it was hilly, you know, we would, we would get aggressive and I would really get my heart pumping.

And for me, it just was a huge release to relief, excuse me, to feel my heart pumping, knowing it was due to  exercise,  not due to anxiety. Because a lot of my life I spent with my heart pounding and racing due to anxiety. I wanted to know that it was for something productive. Okay, so that's tip number four.

Make plans. Do something different. Try and plan something that is just for you, but has, can fill different buckets. Right? Your social bucket, your self care bucket. Maybe you can do that. Go to a yoga class and then have coffee with a friend afterwards or decaf tea if you don't want to get all amped up after you just relax, right?

You know what I'm saying. Something for you, something that you can commit to so you won't talk yourself out of it, right? That involves other people, preferably not teachers. And if they are teachers, if those are the only friends you have, then you set a boundary and you say, Hey, this is our time. Let's not talk about school because if you talk about school, you're not going to be talking about all the great things that happened.

You're going to be in that, you know, admiring the problem, commiserating mode, talking about how stressed, how ridiculous the parent, how challenging the student, how awful administration, right? All those things. That's not going to do anything scaries. All right. So that's number make the plans  that fill the bucket.

All right. Here is The number one thing that helped me, it was a mindset shift and it took some habit, but it, some practice, shall we say, but once it was a habit, it really did help. And this was the fact, I, I didn't want to put that pressure on myself, like, oh, I'm not going to take any work home, or I'm not going to work this weekend, because That in itself has another type of anxiety attached to it, right?

We feel like a failure then, if we do have to do some work. We feel the judgment of our family, right? Like that's all stuff we're putting on ourselves. So it's unrealistic to say I'm never going to take work home or I'm never going to lesson plan at home or whatever. But here was the commitment I made myself.

I would tell myself that Sunday at seven,  I would do work for one hour.  I would work from one hour, Sundays at seven. By Sundays at seven, everybody had eaten, you know, everybody, everything had been done, kids were settling down,  you know, part time with my partner, like eight o'clock was a, you know, reasonable hour to settle and watch a movie or a show or something, but seven o'clock, I was going to work for an hour.

And what that really did for me was, one, I only, I limited myself to one hour work over the weekend. But it was not the fact that it was just physically one hour. It was mentally, all weekend, any time something came up, I would tell myself, that's a Sunday at seven problem.  I'll think about it Sunday at seven.

I'll think about it Sunday at seven. Okay, and so that's what it did for me. It freed up that kind of mental chatter, workspace, kind of,  it just cleared it up. Every time something kind of bubbled up that was stressing me out,  That's a Sunday at 7 problem. And then Sunday at 7, yeah, I would sit down and I would, you know, cram through stuff because I was rested and if I didn't have stuff to cram through, if I really didn't have anything to do, then I would still take that time for myself to be proactive or creative to think about something about school, right?

What I wanted to avoid was, let's say I was at my daughter's school,  dance rehearsal or whatever and the only thing I was doing was checking my school emails or looking on Pinterest for the lesson plans or you know all that stuff. Like I wanted to be completely not engaged with school except for that one hour.

So anything that  that happened or I thought of during the weekend, I'd say that's a Sunday at 7 problem. And if it was a situation I was concerned about something I was worried about, I would do the same thing. I will figure that out at 7pm. Now, I used to like to kind of role play with myself or play what's the worst case scenario, right?

Let's take this to its worst case scenario and then make myself feel ridiculous about it. Right. Let's say that I knew I had to have an interaction with a parent that wasn't going to go well. I would play worst case scenario. So like, what's the worst thing that can happen? Oh, they could complain to the admin and then the admin could put me on on a PIP, right, Program Improvement Plan.

And then I could lose my job and that, you know what I mean? And then you'd start laughing like, Oh my gosh. Yeah. I'm never going to be hireable again because this bad parent interaction. Right. Now I encourage you to use. Chat GPT, if you want to role play something, you know, if you've got time in that one hour, here's the situation, give me some scripts, role play with me how I might approach this, right?

So that is still work that you could, that emotional work, doesn't just have to be lesson planning or grading or, you know, cleaning up Google Classroom, that emotional labor, you could still do that in that one hour, right? So there's a time for it. Anytime something bubbles up. Tell myself, you know what, that's a Sunday at seven problem.

And then be disciplined about setting the timer for one hour, and then when that one hour was done, you know, we're done. Now it's a Monday problem. We'll worry about it tomorrow.  All right, so there are my five tips I'm going to summarize in a minute. But here's just another quick bonus tip. Here's something that I found helped me.

And that was I would just in the silliest way, who cares? You don't need to tell anyone in case they're like that silly.  It's only, it's not silly if it works, right? That's what I always say to people. Listen, if it works and if it makes you feel 1 percent better, Who cares? Then it's worth doing. I would make sure there was something small for me to look forward to on Monday.

I don't care if that was a tasty lunch. Like, I'd make sure I would have something, a little something tasty or some leftovers. Oh my gosh, it  If I went out on Sunday, I would make sure I left something. If I went out to eat on the weekend, I would leave it for Monday for lunch, so I could be all excited about my lunch, right?

Or just know that I was going to wear my favorite, most comfiest clothes on Monday or something that made Monday just a little bit exciting for me. That helped. Okay. That's me. Maybe that doesn't help for you, but maybe, you know, maybe it does. Maybe if I limited myself to one, you know, drive thru coffee, I actually, I, my rule was one a month, but if it was one a week, let's make sure it's on a Monday. 

Something to look forward to. Okay. All right. So let me summarize. I just want to tell you, listen, you are in control of how you're, how you experience your weekend. Okay, don't, don't buy into the fact, oh all teachers feel this way, it's always going to be this way this is the worst profession for this.

Like, like just don't. That's, you're telling yourself a story that you're making true that doesn't need to be true. Okay, it could be any profession and there are plenty of teachers out there who do enjoy their weekend. So that should tell you it is possible and if it's possible for others, it is absolutely possible for you.

Okay, and by investing in your well being, right, you're setting, not only setting yourself up for a more positive week, like, that's the Best thing you can do for yourself but for your students. Show up refreshed on a Monday.  Your energy teaches more than your lesson plans. Try, it's really important that you show up,  you know, as refreshed as you can be and, you know, with a clean slate for everybody.

Let last week's drama be put to rest.  Fresh start, right? Okay, so here are the  Five tips.  Number one, keep it in perspective. It's not just teaching. Number two, do as much as you can on Friday. For sure have Monday planned, or at least a Monday checklist,  so that, that you don't want to start the week off Rushed.

That's a horrible way to start off the week. And even if you tell yourself, Oh, I'll get to school early on Monday. Like, you don't know what traffic's gonna be, right? You just don't set yourself up for like a crazy Monday. They're already crazy and unpredictable, right? At least have your copies made and your, your lesson planned for the morning.

For the morning, maybe you could do the rest over lunch. Okay, I'm realistic here, but don't leave yourself high and dry for Monday. And if you can get any errands done,  On your way home on a Friday, just do it and then have a low key Friday night. You know it's going to be low key, right? It's odd days of like, oh, I'm going to go out and party on Fridays.

You know, maybe if you're a brand new teacher and you're in your early 20s, but I'm thinking people listening to the podcast are older. It's not happening. All right, and let go of the guilt of that.  Number three set yourself up for success with technology. Number three. Right, don't get dragged into school mode because your technology took you hijack. 

Number four, make some kind of plans so that you don't bail on doing something at least different outside, hopefully. If the weather's bad inside, but something more fun that will fill a self care bucket as far as  nature or exercise goes and a social bucket connection with others.  And if they are teachers set a boundary that you're not going to talk about school.

Okay. And then number five, this one I really think is a game changer. If you can get it down and train yourself, That's a Sunday at 7 problem, right, that you're just going to outsource any type of physical work that you need to do, emotional labor, worrying about stuff, you're going to, you're going to time slot it for one hour over the weekend, whatever hour works for you, maybe you're an early riser, you want to do it, you know, 6am Saturday.

Before the rest of the house gets up and hijacks your schedule, you know, whatever, but then just be done with it. I think it's good for the end of the weekend. That way you just, as it bubbles up during the weekend, you're like, nope, I'm gonna deal with that then. And then the bonus tip was like, have some, you know, psych yourself out.

Have a little something fun to look forward to on Monday.  Okay, that's it. Listen, I believe in you. I know that you can make healthy changes for your own well being and when you look after yourself,  everybody benefits. You, your family, your students. All the things. Okay? So I hope you find those tips helpful.

Thank you to everybody who reached out for me from last week's lesson lesson podcast on the lovely list. Yes, I have been making my lovely list this week. It's so easy. It has been a fun thing to do. I'm definitely going to stay with it. Obviously I have a whole bunch of strategies that I work on for my positive mindset habits, but that one just seemed easy when the other ones were going stale.

So if you didn't listen to last week's episode, go listen to it. It was a shorty, but a good one, I think. All right, until next time,  thank you for everything that you do for children and create your own path  and bring your own sunshine.