Nation Of Islam: Relationship Goals For the Righteous - Henry Muhammad

Transcript

Welcome And Topic Setup

SPEAKER_03 0:11

Peace World, how are you doing? It's your brother Mikey Fever. Welcome to another episode of NYP Talk. Show the coolest podcast within this conscious sphere. Don't forget to comment, like, share, subscribe. We got super chats. We have merch. Show love. Tell a friend and tell a friend. Hope everyone has a blessed one. Have a blessed week. It's Thursday. Friday is near, so you know what time it is. Tonight we got our special brother who has blessed this platform with you know his presence and information. Very solid, very forthcoming and loving for the people. Our good brother Henry Muhammad. Peace, brother. How you doing?

SPEAKER_00 0:49

Peace, Mikey. Mikey fevering good by the grace of Allah and yourself, brother.

SPEAKER_03 0:53

I'm good, man.

SPEAKER_00 0:54

Happy, happy, happy to see you, happy to hear from you, brother. Yes, sir. It's good to see you again, brother. It's good to be on the air with you and your people here. Thank you for being humbled by that, and thank Allah much for the opportunity.

SPEAKER_03 1:05

Now we humble, man. You you brothers came out and showed love, man. You know, peace, peace to y'all, man. Peace to Brother Jabril. Peace to my brother Ron, man. Like, you know, solid brothers, right there, man.

SPEAKER_00 1:14

Yes, sir.

SPEAKER_03 1:15

And tonight is a is a very powerful show, very, very beautiful, very deep. And I like this right here. It's it's talking about the nation of Islam's perspective on the relationship goals for the righteous. Yes, sir.

SPEAKER_00 1:28

Okay, it's a good topic. It's a good topic.

Equally Yoked Versus Attraction

SPEAKER_03 1:30

Definitely, definitely, man. And we know we're gonna, you know, get it, as they say in the street, get it cracking the max of a max uh ask the first question I would like to ask, right? Yes, sir. We know you know the process, but we like to know this. We know that unalike attracts and like repels. Do you feel like the principle can apply in dating court and or do you feel a couple should be equally yoked?

SPEAKER_00 1:59

You know, um, based off of the knowledge that I have from the teachings of the most honorable Ajay Muhammad and the guidance of Minister Farrakhan, yeah, and being around for a while as a student minister is definitely being equally yoked. But the um that is something that's a process as well, you know, in today's society, because it can it can play out in different ways where it may not start out that way and it can end up that way as uh the people get to know one another. So uh say that to say sometimes we're attracted to one another, and through that attraction, we find ourselves getting into what the person we're attracted is into, you know, and then it grows into more of an equally yoked kind of situation. And so, you know, just to uh elaborate on that a little bit, on the negative side, when we were ignorant, yeah, and we get into relationships, you know. Um most times as we are as young men coming up, we get our girl caught up into the negativity that we're caught up in. That's true indeed. Yep. You know, and you know, and then you know, someone can look at that as if we equally yoke. You know, she's doing what I do, she's my girl, but you know it ain't what you're doing ain't right.

unknown 3:18

Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 3:18

You see what I mean? Or she's on the same foundation that I'm on. So, but when it comes down to doing it in a righteous way in the name of God, in the name of Allah, then there's laws, rules, and regulations. And we all on both sides have to, you know, equal up to that to the best of their ability. Because if not, then it starts causing other things to happen that could have been avoided.

Courtship As Due Diligence

SPEAKER_03 3:41

I got that, I respect that. So, within the nation of Islam, on their perspective of relationships and eventually being married, becoming one union. What is the process for like courting a sister? Because you know, in the in the outside of that, the world is like the world has their own perspective and views, and you know, some of it makes sense, some of it I don't agree with. But I like to know what is the nation of Islam's perspective. Yes, sir.

SPEAKER_00 4:07

Well, the courtship process is really just you know, in a sense, what it says, courtship. You're you're taking that person to court, you know, and that person is taking you to court. So, um, in the sense of when you go to court, you got to present your case. When you present your case, there's a background check, you know. In that background check, there's an investigation, there's due diligence, you know, there's the prosecuting attorney, and there's the defense attorney. So, you know, you're defending yourself, and she's defending herself, but it's not a defense in a negative, it's more of a defense and prosecuting in regards to really studying what you're about to get into, studying the person. You know, um, you know, they got this thing whereas, and I'll just use this as a sidebar, you know, um, the you see the commercials about car facts. Yeah. You want to buy you a car, you want to check to see how many accidents that car has been in, right? It's a used car, you want to find out how many accidents it's been in, so you check the car facts. Well, if you get in a relationship with somebody, you need to check the the facts on how many relationships that person has been in, how those relationships went. Did it work out for the best, or why did it fail? You know what I mean? And you want to get into understanding that, not that you're hating on anybody for lack of a better term, but you want to know some of the facts because there may have been damage done emotionally, there may have been things, you know. So, and and vice versa, the sister should be wanting to know certain facts about the brother, exactly. So, you know, that's part of it. But just to add a little bit more, when it comes down to the courtship process in the nation of Islam, it's not it's much different from what we've known of the world, right? And so it it there's a there's a um a process that we even coming into it have to adapt to because to the point whereas you may be interested in a sister and you know, and you want to, you know, find out more about her. Well, there's an introduction that takes place, you know, there's an introduction that takes place. It's not just you just get to walk up on any sister or anything like that. No, the women are very sacred, you know, in the eyes of God. And you know, as we learn more and more about that, then that introduction is being made. But the introduction is just because to let the sister know, and the brother, he's interested. He's interested in getting to know you. Doesn't mean that you're gonna get married, doesn't mean he's putting a ring on your finger, but it allows that that that um opportunity to start having that dialogue where we can talk to one another, you know, because we have laws, rules, and regulations in the mosque where we're not to be fraternizing. So with the brothers and the sisters together like that. So if you're not married, why are you all up in her face? Why is she all up in your face? Somebody would want it would want to know. So it's regulated, you know. Start off with a proper respect and a proper understanding.

SPEAKER_03 7:07

I like that. I like I like the how you elaborate on that as far as keeping a woman sacred and respecting her space, and the brother respecting himself to make sure his his and her attentions are pure, right? Um, you said as far as being equally yoked, do you is mental health also considered in that process, too? Like making sure the person is like yes, same.

SPEAKER_00 7:28

Well, I say, you know, yes, brother. And for um for us, it's it's a matter of making sure, you know, the brother or the sister is on all the mental faculties is proper, you know, and there's times, of course, uh we can see people that we know in society, people that we've come up with in social circus, social circles, circles, that there may be a mental issue there, they've just never been diagnosed. Yeah, you know, and you'd be like, something's going on with bruh, something's going on with sis, you know. So that is is something that you know that can remain to be unseen until it felt filters out. However, when we know that there's a brother or a sister that's on uh medication, then that has to be made known in the courtship process. You know what I mean? You know, so we kind of try to do a thorough thing when it comes down to that, you know, and and there's a representative from the brother's side, there's a representative from the sister side in the midst of that introduction who knows something about the brother, who knows something about the sister as it pertains to how they've been coming up in Islam, in the teachings, you know, and they're able to um help in terms of dealing with the guidance, not not bashing no one or anything like that, but just if there's certain concerns that need to be made known, then make it known in that introduction, you know, so that way they're both clear of where they're starting out from. I love that.

Why Marriage Is Sacred

SPEAKER_03 9:01

Beautiful, beautiful. How does a nation of Islam define the purpose of marriage?

SPEAKER_00 9:09

According to the Holy Quran and the Bible, the purpose of marriage is defined from there. And so marriage is a sacred institution, and that sacred institution of two people becoming one in the name of Allah, in the name of God, that's something when you start dealing with sacredness, then you're dealing with something that's very, very much needs to be protected, must be entered into with all caution, in the sense of because you're doing this in the name of God, and this this is two people becoming striving to become one and having a foundation that is under God's way that they will always be centered on in the in their personal lives, individually and collectively. So um marriage is looked at as a very sacred institution.

Why Black Marriage Struggles Today

SPEAKER_03 9:58

Got that. What's so dope about this, right? Because learning about the nation of Islam, and you know, we see this, we see the statistics today. Marriage with the marriage rates within our community. Like, you know, it's on a heavy decline. There's an attack on the nuclear family, as we as we say we know it. And you tend to see a lot of um couples just disintegrate, like there'll be issues of um you know, they have unreckon unreconciliation differences, stuff like that.

SPEAKER_00 10:32

Irreconcilable, irreconcilable differences, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 10:34

And it'd be like over some, like that's not the person I you know hooked up with in the beginning, initially met. Right. Like, you know, I realize this after five plus years, I'm I'm no longer happy. Like, this is not my husband, this is not my wife, or the person is out of shape, or you know, this you know, the last thing is the infidelity. Yes, like like how how how do you guys like prevent that from escalating to that point?

SPEAKER_00 11:02

No, brother, brother Mikey, um fever. We we when we think about it, there's so much that comes into play about what we as a people have been robbed of through our sojourn here in America. You know, and so our history of why we're here, how we got here, what happened to us since we've been here, all that has to be taken into consideration when we start thinking about marriage, when we start thinking about relationships, um, because the the white man, the enemy, and and I'm saying enemy because the ancestors of the white people who are in front of us today, their mothers and fathers, their great-grandgrandparents didn't bring our ancestors here to keep us as a family. When they brought us here on the holes of slaveship, their main uh objective, one of their main objectives was to make us slaves and break us up as a family. So we weren't allowed to get married. We wasn't allowed to show love to one another, even though we had love for one another. And if we, you know, even stood up, tried to stand up for our woman based off of what the slave master was doing, then we were made an example of. So they had to break that kind of bond and that kind of will. And then here we go centuries down the line of not really having that, you know. Innately it was in us, but to be able to know how to um profess it in the proper way, we were robbed of that. So you still got today people jumping the broom.

SPEAKER_02 12:32

Yeah.

Roles, Accountability And Mediation

SPEAKER_00 12:33

Which was really a uh uh old slave way of us getting married because they wouldn't allow us to get married. So we had to privately get have our own wedding and we jump the broom and let's say we're married, right? So I'm gonna stick it into that because just to lay a base of the kind of ignorance that still persists or exists among us today when we start dealing with relationships and dealing with marriage that can go for five years and then all of a sudden fail. But it's a matter of how it started out, you know. If it's not starting out proper, then it can be doomed to fail if we don't get the proper guidance and so forth and counsel that comes along with that. So in the nation of Islam, it's a matter of starting out on the right foot, and and what the starting out on the right foot has a lot to do with two people evenly yoked and striving to live according to God's law that is regulating us on how the male treats the female, how the female treats the male. Now, in the Holy Quran, Allah says, um, and I'm kind of paraphrasing, um it's a section on the women, a whole chapter is dedicated to the women. And it says, Oh, people, keep your duty to your Lord who created you from a single being and created your mate of the same kind, and spread from these two many men and women, and keep your duty to Allah by whom you uh demand from one another your relationships. So there's a demand that the man has on a woman, there's a demand that the woman has on the man. And what are these demands? It's based off of our role as a husband, our role as a as a wife. And when we understand our roles as husband and wife, then we hold each other accountable to our role. But it's to our role in the name of God. So if we if I try to add something to your role, you try to add something to my role, say, wait, wait, wait, hold on. No, no, that's not what I'm supposed to be doing. That's what you're supposed to be doing. Now, if we agree that you need help with that, then we work with that. And then at the same time, in the in the in between all that, there's dealing with making sure we deal with conflict resolution, any disagreement that we have. We take it right back to what we know is our role and responsibility, and we take it right back to what is already written in the scriptures as it pertains to that, and we, you know, we dialogue and debate from that vantage point so that we don't get out of, you know, get off course. I got ready to say get out of pocket, but I don't want to say that. But get off course, you know, and so those kind of things is what help. Now, does it always go that way? No. Because all of us have different things that may be um lying within that are things that affected us from years ago or affected us from other relationships, and then something may come up that reminds us of something that we went through before, and we, you know, respond in a different way, and all of a sudden our demeanor changes, our voice tones start changing. But that's in the nation, that's when it comes to the point where if if you're um being disagreeable with one another, the best thing to do at that point is seek counsel. And that's where a person like myself as a student minister comes into play to help y'all talk it out. A mediator in between, and that's guidance from the Quran. That you know, if we come up into disagreement and we can't settle it, then we go for an arbitrator that will be able to sit before us and hear both sides and help us think it through, not judge this side versus that side, help us think it through, and that helps a great deal, you know, versus us being down in the courts, family court, and this, that, and the other. No, it's the house of God where we come to that one that we trust and know us and be seeing us come up and want to see the best for us, you know. So now when you start mentioning about infidelity or, you know, um what we would call um what's um irreconcilable differences? And then now those become serious violations. You know, those are serious violations that brings on a whole nother trial if that happens in the marriage, you know, because that becomes a big violation of the vows that were taken.

SPEAKER_03 16:55

Gotcha. Oh, that was deep right there. Um, I wanted to add on to this, is like I I read this book from Sister Um Shahwazar Ali, the black man's guide to understand the black woman, and she also have uh the second black woman's long, long, long time. Go ahead. There were a lot of things that she said that you that you that you touched on is um it's having the proper village and the pillars of your faith is what helped the marriage. Because you know, a lot of people get married in, like you said, in the name of God, and I'm not bashing religion like through Christianity or another form. And you we get it, human beings at times will bump heads, like there's a saying in Creole where they say the tongue and the teeth will meet somehow, cause pain. So there's always gonna be some friction, yes. But but as we see, like in uh within our community, also like say, for instance, there's always like an echo chamber of people you know repeating the negative things, like yo, just call it quits. Like the itch, it could be minor, minor factors, but people be like, yo, I just I don't want to do it anymore. And then as you mentioned, some people will hold on to old baggage, which I find very um the baggage is to hold on to is very detrimental to a marriage. Like I cannot put all relationship, I cannot put my past errors on you, and vice versa for my experiences because that that would hinder the growth. Yes, and I'm glad that you said that um it's important that we have counseling because you don't you don't hear that too much too much in our communities, so to hear that within the nation of Islam, that's powerful, right there.

SPEAKER_00 18:21

Yes, that you guys actually know it's something because it's needed, and I know um of the mindset of you know many of us, and I'm just using it from just um studying myself from going years back, you know, coming into this kind of fold where you're getting more God-centered, and in getting God centered as in in the nation of Islam, it's a matter of following God's law and striving to, you know, submit yourself to that law. And when we're talking about laws, it's the it's it's a combination of laws that you would find in the Ten Commandments, you know, and the laws of the Quran, you know. So what's in the Bible of Moses' law and what's in the Quran, it's mixed together because it's really all coming from one book. But there's also rules of conduct, which is a law that you start striving to straighten yourself up where your conduct is concerned. And good manners make for you know good conduct, right? You know, you know, and so the mannerisms start changing. And so for some of us, it may be to the point where it's like, man, I'm not doing all that. I mean, now all of a sudden I gotta do this and I gotta do that. But what is this for? We're not doing, I'm not just doing it for my wife, I'm doing it for Allah. Yep, that's who is first and foremost. So the thing is, marriage is one half of your faith. So if I'm a Christian or if I'm a Muslim or if I'm practicing Judaism, there's a certain faith that I have. And my faith is, you know, as it's written, the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things yet unseen, according to the Bible. In the dictionary, faith is confidence or trust in a person or a thing. So if my confidence and trust is in the prophet, or my confidence and trust is in the prophet who's representing God, and my ultimate confidence and trust has to be in God.

SPEAKER_03 20:19

In God first, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:20

So my confidence and trust is in the honorable minister Louis Farrakhan, because he is that chief example and representative of the honorable Elijah Muhammad, who is the one that stood up in front of us and told us about God and how he met God, then I'm rolling on that kind of confidence and trust, not just based off of what I hear, but what I've seen those men do standing in the way of God, and it makes me want to stand. So now that I'm growing in my knowledge, I'm growing in my faith, and I've had examples in front of me, then I'm standing on that. So in my faith, I start learning how to fast, I start learning how to pray, I start going through Ramadan, right? I'm paying my charities, my tithe, and my offering. And as a Christian, we're doing all these same things, right? Yep. So if I do that for God who's not right in front of me, then what am I gonna do with one for my wife that I sleep with every day? That I eat food with every day, that I pay rent or mortgage bills with every day, that I'm willing to put my life on the line for. So if I do it for God, I'm not gonna do it for my wife.

SPEAKER_03 21:26

You must be the loser if you don't do that.

SPEAKER_00 21:29

So now, yet I'm talking righteousness. If marriage is one half of my faith, then I gotta be able to do it for the unseen and the seen. Am I willing to sacrifice for my wife like I sacrificed for God? Am I willing to I fast for God and go without eating any food throughout Ramadan, throughout the daylight hours, no drinking, no eating, and I'm making prayers and I'm reading the Quran? Well, what am I willing to give up and take a fast on for my wife? If I used to drink and used to hang out, am I gonna stay? Hanging out since that bothers her.

SPEAKER_03 22:02

Talk about it. Hold on. Let me give you hold on. Let me give you props for that right there. That right there is so true. Because I this is proverbs, my grandmother used to say, and may peace be upon her. She always told me this, and I you know, I didn't pay heed to what I'm in my younger days. She said, uh uh, a good woman to you is a blessing from God. Yes. Because she said it's rare. This is my grandmother talking before she passed. You know, she used to always say that to find a good husband or a good man in these times, yeah, is critical.

unknown 22:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 22:34

Because you know, because nobody's perfect.

SPEAKER_00 22:36

No, and then that's and I'm glad you're on that point because you're making me think of which from what your grandmother said, Proverbs, I think it's Proverbs 31. Uh, a virtuous woman is worth more than rubies and gold. Yep. Right? Yeah. When you look at the black woman, you're looking at black gold. Now, somebody said, Well, you know, all these women ain't right, and this, that, and the other. Honorable Minister Lewis Farrakhan said it to us like this. He said, You know, the honorable Laj Muhammad said, it's one thing to know that there's gold and diamonds and minerals in the earth, is another thing for how to learn how to mine it out.

SPEAKER_03 23:14

Talk about it.

SPEAKER_00 23:15

Sometimes we'll be looking at our woman, and you've been with her for four or five years, and you're getting tired of this and tired of that, and you want you a new woman. There's a new woman in that woman you got. You just gotta mine it out.

SPEAKER_03 23:26

That's it.

SPEAKER_00 23:27

Just as that woman, there's a new man in that man you got, you just gotta mine it out. Now it's a matter of do you know how to mine it out? And of course we don't know. So then how do we learn?

SPEAKER_03 23:38

Study your Bible.

SPEAKER_00 23:39

There's this guidance from God, but we're not gonna just be able to pick up the Bible and the Quran and just get it like that. Somebody gotta be able to help us get an understanding of what we're looking at in the scriptures that may be hidden in there because there's a lot there, but it's to help guide us in terms of dealing with our lives, our society, and the world that we're producing from our faith and our actions.

SPEAKER_03 24:02

Talk about it. Damn, brother. Yo, you dropped so much wisdom right there, man. There's a lot in there, bro. Touch touch my heart right there.

SPEAKER_00 24:10

I'm still in the process, too.

SPEAKER_03 24:13

And there's a lot that could be said because um, part of my language, when I was coming up, we were taught wrong. The B-word ain't uh you know, you hear black women saying the black man's a dog, and you know, I don't want to sound um rhetorical, nor uh you know uh facade. We say it was the music, but it's the environment too that plays a part. Especially you have if you have parents or family members that are toxic that don't know anything about a successful marriage, right? Right, nothing, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:46

I might give you not to they can tell you what not to do if they're basing it off of the mistakes they've made or the errors they made, but exactly that's it only can go by so far, exactly. And so you're hitting on a very, very key point, brother. That part where from our environment and how it has shaped us and shaped our attitudes toward men and our attitudes toward women, and even our attitudes toward relationships, because of what we may have seen happen with our mother and father, and how it how they broke up and how it broke our heart to have to choose between the two, and then in our minds saying, I'll never get married, I'll never do this. See, all that has an effect, and this is where, like, you know, I keep going right back to God because the the way of God has to come into play, and then we'll get to the point where we don't even trust that. But when someone's coming before you to make sense of it, then it's a matter, okay, you I'm not saying you gotta do it, but you need to think about it and try it off as size, you know, because all of us have been affected. Many of us, if we've been in relationships coming up, you know, we've gotten our heart broke, we've we've broken ourselves and our ignorance, and we've had people tell us, you know, um, you know, you don't be giving no woman your money, you don't be tricking like that. You have people we have women tell, don't make sure you keep some statue yourself because that man is gonna do this, all that, but all that's negative. That's not proper guidance, but it's based off of environment, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 26:15

You're manifesting it when you put it out there instead of speaking life, and like, yes, so you know, maybe sit down with your partner and talk about it, or you know, it's also like they say, it takes work, marriage, yeah, and relationships, because there are times you'd be like, Yo, what is going on? You gotta you know, pull yourself back and be like, I don't, I don't want us to get to that point where we become toxic because it seems like to the toxicity now is celebrated. You see it in in movies and stuff, and how people talk, and I'm like, why are we talking like this? Right, right. Like we we we're looking like like a dysfunctional um you know society out here, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 26:50

We gotta work together. It doesn't necessarily have to be like that, you know. The word relationship, you know, relate. We gotta relate to one another, and the last part on that is ship. So we gotta understand how to guide the ship based off of how we relate, you see, and the ship, and yeah, on any ship that we may be on, it's not sailing on smooth water, it's going through rough waters. But as long as you're able to guide the ship properly, you can guide it through the rough times, you can guide it through the smooth times, you know. But you know, just looking at that word relationship, okay? There's a ship, we we both want it together, you know, and we're gonna go through storms, we're gonna go through sunny weather, we're gonna go through waves, and we may go through a tidal wave, but as long as we're guiding it right, we'll make it through.

Why One Wife In NOI

SPEAKER_03 27:39

Gotcha, I got you. I'm I'm asking another question for you, right? Mean that we're speaking about the nation of Islam's perspective on relationships that leads into marriage, and once people hear the word Islam, they're gonna automatically be like, Oh my god, those are the that most of these people have four plus wives, whatever. Okay, so I'm actually a question in the in a general sense of of Islam, in the general Muslim world, a man can have up to four wives. Why is it that in the nation of Islam, a man can only have one? Yes, sir.

SPEAKER_00 28:12

Well, because we understand, first of all, the history of that time and why they were taking on more than one wife. It was due to the fact that there was wars going on with the Muslims and the Kraish tribes and others, and they were losing men. So women was losing their husbands. And the law was that the men are the maintainers of women, so to avoid women from ending up being without that protector and that maintainer, and to avoid them from turning to one another, then the man would take on that woman as his wife, add it to his family to protect her, provide for her in that sense. It wasn't about sex, it wasn't for the purpose of wanting to be able to have more than one woman that I can go in and out of at nighttime. Now, of course, it's common that if it's your wife, you're gonna have some conjugal relationship with her, but that wasn't the purpose for taking on more than one at that time. And then the Quran, Allah says in the Quran, you can have up to four, but then he says, which many people, even Muslims, don't always take into consideration, he says, one is best for you if you but knew. Talk about it, and then they say, you know, Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, in his um sayings was quoted as saying, a man taking on more than one wife is like taking fire into your chest. Because you don't have two hearts, you don't have three hearts, you don't have four hearts. So, how are you gonna be able to please four women who have all have uh their own heart? You see, so that fire that you take on in your chest when you take on more than one is the stress of trying to maintain these different personalities, it's the stress of leaving one, knowing that she knows you're going to another one and the pain she feels. No woman in her right mind really wants to share her man, just like no man in his right mind wants to share his woman. And so you're not gonna feel that pain as a human being, as a righteous person, so that puts stress on your head.

SPEAKER_03 30:20

Hold on, minister. Hold on, minister. No, no, no, no, you're on fire. No, hold on. I gotta give you that. Oh my you oh my god, yo. You go ahead, continue going. He just said something real.

SPEAKER_00 30:32

With that being said, the honorable minister Louis Farcon warned us that as men, we should not even be contemplating that because the condition that we've been put in in America, when it comes down to women, we know we're not prepared for nothing like that. Because we have not looked at the black, the black woman has been in so much pain over the past 400 years. She don't need no more pain like that. And for a man that has been coming up in this society, just as you mentioned, the environment we came up out of, it didn't train us up and prepare us to be able to take take care and maintain more than one woman. We're still trying to work with the one we got. You can't have four women and they all on welfare and you think you taking care. No, men are the maintainers of women, and that's not only financially, that's spiritually, mentally, morally. So the maintain is to upkeep. That means whatever level they were on when you met them, you meet them at that level and you take them further up from that level. So now, are you ready to do that? No, and in this kind of society of America, where they have their own laws and rules and regulations, to go against the law of the land is really disrespectful to the whole government, you know, and so you know, you know, in this day and time of how we're living and where we're at mentally as men and as women, none of us are prepared for that. No, so one is best for you if you but knew.

SPEAKER_03 32:11

You said it's all right. I think one is important because I'm gonna be honest, man. Coming up, I've been there trying to be a player, man. Listen, whenever I got caught, although it was embarrassing, I was happy. I was like, you know what, I don't have to keep up with this no more.

SPEAKER_00 32:24

Because you you was glad to give up, get that stress up off your show.

SPEAKER_03 32:27

Yeah, bro. Because you gotta you gotta have that facade, that face on, and then right, especially if you have a conscience inside you know the conscience be killing you, like you doing, you're doing it, you like yeah, oh god, and you know, brother, when you say that, brother, brother Mikey Fever, you know that's the thing that brothers know they can reflect back on.

SPEAKER_00 32:48

Anybody taking up on a subject matter of more than one wife, and and maybe even in disagreement with what I'm saying, that's all right, but you know, good and doggone world uh well that when you was out there coming up as a young brother, if you was a womanizer and you was playing on women and you had three and four, and these were notches on your belt, and you really think you're doing something, you knew that was stressful as hell. And you said, No, it wasn't stressful, I was handling it. You was handling it by lying a lot.

SPEAKER_03 33:14

Stress, bro, it's stress because you can't keep up with the lies. You can't keep up with your lies. First of all, I don't care how good you are, you're not keeping up with the lies, and then once that truth is once you shatter that trust with her, there's no coming back. Now you're not you're not getting that woman back, it's gonna take a lot of work, and you know, it probably is the same thing for women. And I remember um I seen a lot of prime examples fall like that, you know. My old my my pops like was out there now. You know, you're alone, right? Like, I don't want that life. You're like you alone, no one, no one to love like that. And then you know, to hear him say, yo, I was a man to I was a man to many, but husband to none. And he said I was there physically, but mentally, was I there morally? No, right, right. So you you were just chasing your lower self, the lower vibration, you know, because you didn't know when to cut it short. Like if it's not working out, just leave. But some people stay for you know the sexual gratification. Exactly.

SPEAKER_00 34:11

And and and and you know, sex can be a drug, yep. You know what I mean? And and and and people can become so addicted to it that that's all they're looking for, and then you know it's almost like crack. You know what I mean? You're looking for that next hit, that next hit, and then after that, I'm done with you until I get the next hit. That's not good because that's that that that's working on us and and and rotting us away from the inside out.

Why Reform Starts With Women

SPEAKER_03 34:37

Got you, got you. All right, another question, man. This is beautiful, man. What did Elijah Muhammad mean when he said that 75% of the work is with the woman? Why did he say that?

SPEAKER_00 34:49

Oh wow, you know, I noticed that when everybody who um, for the most part, that quotes that quote, they leave out the other part. Yeah, he says 75 of his work is with the woman in the way of reform. Because the woman now now think about it. Anything that we uh are looking for as far as for uplift for humanity, if we're looking for a cure for cancer, if we're looking for the the next savior or messenger or someone that's gonna be able to bring up another invention that can take a catapult us into another level of technology, if we're looking for a cure to AIDS or you know, um any disease, or we're looking for some major inventor, it's gonna come through the womb of a woman, brother.

SPEAKER_03 35:48

That's a fact. That's a fact. That's the first teacher.

SPEAKER_00 35:51

Yes. So if the woman is not right in her thinking and in the way that she takes care of herself, she's not gonna produce children that can be children of consequence. It doesn't matter they won't grow up and eventually become children of consequence, but it's supposed to start from the cradle. So, with 75% of the work being with the woman, the other side of that is understanding in the way of reform because we as a people, black people in America and other countries where we are under oppression, we would not be able to be oppressed if the man had not been crushed by the oppressor. So the the the the Caucasian white man in bringing us over here and making us into slaves, he had to break the will of the man first in order to make us into slaves. And once you break the will of the man, then his woman becomes your prize. And so when she becomes your prize, like as in the in the way of war, calling her your booty, then that means she's submitting to your education, she's submitting to your name, she's submitting to your politics, she's submitting to your uh um um financial world, she's submitting to your way, your religion, then your man, her man is no longer in charge. So when her man is finally coming up to take charge, the first thing that has to be worked on is his woman. Because in her head is the head of whoever was running the society. So even though she may look black on the outside, she's thinking like the white man. So even though she may look black on the outside, she's got the culture of the white man. So say you come up, and now you're coming out with a knowledge of yourself, and you're starting to learn the knowledge of your ancestors, and you find out, as you just mentioned, you know the culture of Haiti and the way it was with Book Mount and Tucson Overture, and you want to get back to that, but your woman has become Americanized, you're gonna have problems in your household, bro.

SPEAKER_03 37:54

Oh, talk about it. What she's gonna be like, you start before my wheels.

SPEAKER_00 37:58

It's gonna be the point. Either it's gonna be you're gonna either be with me or you're gonna be with that, and now there's choices that gotta be made because now you want to do for self, you see, and what is that? It's not that we gotta look down on her, you realize that this society and her and submission to this way of society has become a problem. We'll come up with the knowledge of the teachings, and this is the same thing when it comes down to uh um someone that's in Christianity or Jehovah's Witness or what have you, because that is Christianity as well. And now we get to the point where we're not celebrating all these holidays that the white man came up with. Oh, what do you mean we're not doing Thanksgiving no more? Oh no, you don't flip out. So your woman's like, what? We mean no more Halloween? No, no, and when you have a direct answer for why we're not doing it, now this also comes into part of what we talked about in the beginning of becoming evenly yoked. Why are we celebrating that? That ain't even really our way, that's all built off of lies and this, that, and the other. Oh, now you done went out to the moss, and now you're giving me all see, or now all of a sudden, but now we're breaking ourselves out of a mindset that was that we were subjected to and was forced upon us because we were following someone else's knowledge, someone else's wisdom, someone else's culture. That's not our culture. So now that I'm coming into a knowledge that allows me to get my develop a culture that's based out of what's good for me and for us, and it's is based in truth and not lies, then if my woman is not solid with that, then my children are not gonna be solid with it, and my household is not gonna be solid with it, so I'm gonna have a problem. So the first thing that has to happen is the work on the woman.

SPEAKER_03 39:48

Because some sisters won't go for that.

SPEAKER_00 39:51

You know, on that note, you know, I believe I remember hearing it from Sister Sharazar Ali. She made this point that was so profound. She said the politics of the white man's house should not be the politics of the black man's house. You know, you know, they have you to the point where they have our women, if they get pregnant, they and they can't get a job or whatever, they gotta go down to to welfare. And they gotta first thing they gotta tell that person at the welfare officer that there's no man in their life. That's a woman with children. You can't have children without a man, so they gotta say, and if there's a man in their life, they gotta lie and say he doesn't exist. Psychologically, at a certain point, when she starts having conflict with that man, you ain't taking care of nothing in here, you ain't no real man. And then the brother's like, oh wow, all of a sudden, no, I'm not the man. Well, why are you saying I'm not the man? Because I'm getting money from them, and they're paying for that. Who's at the end of that? The white man's at the end of that, and even though he may be giving her money, he may be doing certain things, but it can't be known to welfare. So now it's really not known in my mind. I'm really not acknowledging that right now because you're getting on my nerves. It's my house.

SPEAKER_03 41:06

Attack on the nuclear family. Talk about it. That's a fact.

SPEAKER_00 41:10

75% is very important, and white people know that those at the top, they know that. I'm not saying all white people don't care, but those at the top, they know that, and you see how the families are broken up right now.

SPEAKER_03 41:22

Oh man, you yeah, you go to the you go to the family court building, you see that all around. You just see people that look like us in there or um online. There could be issues between uh a couple issues, right? They must take it online for some reason. I don't know. Social media is like it's like the place the platform to go talk about your relationship.

SPEAKER_00 41:39

Yeah, it's like the dear diary that people used to hide and keep their private, you know, thoughts in now. You can just put it all out in front of everybody, and that's uh good either.

Separation, Divorce And Love Tests

SPEAKER_03 41:48

Your life is not a taliperi flick, so stop it. Exactly. Yeah, um, what what are considered valid reasons for separation for the nation of Islam? We know about adultery, he said, and and um uh infidelity, but what other reasons like say, for instance, like there's no adultery, there's no infidelity, but the the man, the brother and the sister cannot get along.

SPEAKER_00 42:11

Well, you know, I say this separation, according to Allah in the Holy Quran, anytime a man and a woman get to the point in their marriage where they gotta separate, the separation is for them to be able to be in solitude, separate from one another, to figure out how they're gonna come back together. It's not separation and then we're going into divorce. No, it's mean that it got to a point whereas we're not we're not agreeing, it's become irreconcilable for us as far as trying to work it out. Maybe we need to separate for a while so that we can start thinking about my actions, your actions, and how we can do better in terms of dealing with making making amends with one another. It's never to the point, because the law hates divorce, so it's never to the point to where we're just gonna push right for divorce. That's the very, very, very, very, very, very last thing. If it gets to the point whereas there's no working it out after trying to deal with it through the different avenues of God's way as well as getting the mediation in terms of dealing with the situation, and it's just we are no longer in love with one another, and we know I no longer want to serve you as a wife, I no longer want to serve you as a husband, and I'm done with it. Then at that point, it can be a divorce. But you know, we try to hold on because we made a vow. We made a vow in the name of God. We gave our word, and our word shall be our bond, and the bond should be there. But if if it gets to the point where we just can't get along and there's no reconciling where this is concerned, and and that that part is I don't love you no more, I'm not in love with you no more. No longer want to serve you as a husband, I no longer want to serve you as a wife, then that's when it's real very detrimental.

unknown 44:06

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 44:07

You know, oftentimes in in the midst of counseling sessions, one of the first things that we want to know before we get into any of this dialogue, do you still love your husband? Do you still love your wife? And they may look at me, and or if it's you and look at you and say, Yeah, no, I want you to say that to him and want you to say that to her before we start getting into this dialogue about what the problems are. Because if y'all still love one another and you still want to serve each other as husband and wife, then we can work out everything else.

SPEAKER_03 44:39

Emotional intelligence must play must play a role in motional intelligence, the respect for one another, hear each other out. Because some a partner, whether husband or wife, may feel like my voice is not being heard. Right, I'm not feeling respect, I don't feel love, and whatever the case may be. So there's this there are a lot of moving pieces involved in that.

SPEAKER_00 44:57

And that at that point right there, just on that, you know, in the book of Ephesians of the Bible, it says, wives, submit yourselves to your husband. Husbands, submit yourselves to your wives. You know, as Christ is is is um submitting himself to the church, you know, husbands submit yourselves to wives, wives submit yourselves to the husband, and then it talks about how there's God and then Christ and then man under under Christ, and then there's woman under man under Christ, and then there's children under man under Christ. So there's there's a protocol, but it doesn't mean that I'm above you and you gotta do everything I say. We're submitting ourselves to one another in the name of God. So my submission to my wife in the sense of subordination, is subordination according to God's power in her in her role. For instance, I'm not going down in that kitchen and telling her how to cook the food, brother. I was totally out of order, you know. Because that what now I'm stepping out of my bounds, you know, but at the same time, if she's doing, and I'm not just saying cooking, but if she's doing her role as a mother and a wife, and she's doing her role where my children are concerned, and keeping the home in a way where it is a home and it's not just an apartment or it's not just a house where she's keeping it clean and she's setting a certain atmosphere, and she says, Look, don't step on that living room floor. I just waxed it. Then what do you think I'm gonna do? Well, I'll pay the bills and I'm stepping. Oh no, but no, step on that living room floor, yeah. Man, I'm gonna submit to what is being said. I'm gonna start, you know what I mean? So what am I supposed to do? You know, but it's it's those kind of things, and when it comes down to dealing with certain things where the children are concerned, because in this in a sense, she's God over those children.

SPEAKER_03 46:53

Talk about it.

SPEAKER_00 46:54

She's keeping them managed on my behalf, and whenever I have to step in on certain things, then she'll call me to step in, then there's things that I know I gotta step in on, but you know, it's a matter of our roles and our responsibilities as it pertains to the way God set things up, you know. You know, remember Adam was in the garden by himself at first, working, yeah, and then God said it ain't right that man be alone and produced a woman for him, you know what I'm saying? As a as a help meet, you know, and so all that comes into play when we start looking into the science of it, you know. And the Quran says, you know, the um woman is an apparel for the man, and the man is an apparel for the woman. Apparel is clothing, so we cover each other.

SPEAKER_01 47:37

Oh, beautiful.

SPEAKER_00 47:38

If you go back, you got my back. Ain't nothing coming in between that, you know what I mean? And that and that's just real. You you step to mine the wrong way, it's gonna be problems.

SPEAKER_03 47:47

Talk about it. I'm the same, I'm the same way.

SPEAKER_00 47:48

I'm expecting that if somebody stepped to me the wrong way, she's gonna step up, and that's when you're gonna see Sister Soldier come out. You did it right.

SPEAKER_03 47:55

Now we tell people that. Listen, now you mess with mommy and I'll put listen. Yeah, no mess with my wife. And I'm about to laugh. I was I was laughing when you said you can't go in the kitchen and tell her how to cook. Because I'm like, the most I say is like I like my turkey breaking, my turkey baking a little crispy. That's all I say.

SPEAKER_00 48:09

Look, come on, you can tell her how you that's right. You can say what you how you like your food in the beginning stage, and then she knows how you like it, and she'll do it, but then other times she's gonna come up with recipes like baby, what did you do with this? I didn't know you knew how to do it. Yes, but there's a lot that goes with that as well, man.

Interracial And Interfaith Realities

SPEAKER_03 48:26

You know, hold on, my brother, hold up a second. Gotta give announced the chat. Shout out to the brother who provided a super chat. We appreciate you, brother. Um uh mud mud, if I'm saying it correctly, I don't want to butcher your name, brother, but appreciate you. So, you know, now now that we know the processes and protocols of court and courtship into relationship to marriage and relation to Islam, right? I want to ask in regards of saying if a brother is a member of the nation, right, and his wife is not, right? So this question is regards to that in regards to faith. What guide what guidance is offered about the interracial, interracial or interfaith of relationships? I had a total I had those race in there.

SPEAKER_00 49:09

When you say interracial, meaning that if a a brother marries a white woman, yeah, is that has that ever happened? Yeah, that has happened. Yeah, that that has happened, you know. I don't know how often, but there's there's been occasions, and so you know, just let's look at it on two different fronts. Let's say a brother is already married to a white woman, okay. Before he comes into the nation of Islam, and then he comes in, you know, and he's learning about the teachings and he knows, you know, where the teaching is in regards to dealing with, you know, how we are about interracial marriage. Our stance on interracial marriage is based off of the condition that we have been put in in America, you know, and where we have not really been a real man to our own woman. So why would we go outside of our race and deal with the children of those who put who were the fathers of those that put us our our ancestors in this situation, in this condition, and then we're gonna go and marry them, okay? So no one can come between true love, all right? Y'all fell in love, got married, you come into this knowledge. That don't mean you go home and disrespect your your your white wife now, you know, but you're not gonna be able to have her up in the mosque with us. I'm just laughing. I'm sorry. I hear you, brother. No, you can take the teachers home to her, you can share it with her. This and when there's public rallies, she can come up. I'm sorry, but that that's just the way it is because we're working on ourselves.

SPEAKER_03 50:50

Can you imagine reading the lessons to her? Like the first and supreme wisdom, who was the original, who was the original, right?

SPEAKER_00 50:57

You know, so no, I can't imagine it because I don't, you know, I don't know what that would be like, but that that would be something. However, yeah, you know, based there has been situations that I'm pretty sure based off of the relationship and the love, yeah, that in private they probably was doing that, you know, going over the lessons, going over this, and that's good. Okay, cool. Because this teaching is for the whole human family, yeah. But in the condition we're in right now in America, as black people, we ain't ready to do that, yeah. You know, wholesale, you know what I mean? So now, and I say that to say this as well, brother. You have some brothers and sisters who cut came up from interracial families, you know, yeah, there are black people that have a mother that's white or have a father that's white, and they come into the understanding of the teachings. You don't disrespect your mother, you don't disrespect your white mother or your white father. You know what I'm saying? No, but if you're talking about if you're immature and you're understanding about the nature of the white man and so forth, then maybe in the beginning stages, you may say some ignorant stuff out your mouth that you're gonna have to really be apologizing about later on.

SPEAKER_03 52:14

Honor that mother and that father, they should be loved.

SPEAKER_00 52:16

There you go, beloved. There you go, and that's the way the honorable man's loss firecon teaches us on that. Like, no, you don't go and disrespect your white mother or your white father because you come from both sides.

SPEAKER_03 52:27

No, no, I'm glad you clarified that for me.

SPEAKER_00 52:31

And I was uh as far as the interracial, that as and how about in regards to interfaith as it pertains to um somebody being from the Christian family and someone being from the you know the Muslim sect. Well, it's not it's not frowned upon, but once again, it would be best to be evenly yoked because you're gonna have a difficult time getting through that in terms of dealing with the um the opposition of culture as it pertains to knowledge and faith. So, for instance, you know, you might find yourself getting into different debates, yeah, about what to do and what not to do, you know what I mean, versus like from what I'm doing in Christianity and what you're saying is not right about what I'm doing, but you practice in Islam and you're saying it's supposed to be this way or that way, that can that can cause you know some heated arguments, and you might make it through that, and many have, but eventually, somewhere down the line, you're gonna have to take on, you know, one or the other's faith. Because in the um, when I just talked about the book of Ephesians, and it's talking about you know, uh wives submit yourselves to your husbands. Well, if the husband is practicing Islam and you're practicing Christianity, but you know the book of Ephesians tells you to submit yourself to him, then that's his way of life as well. You see, now if uh if a if a um a sister in the in the Mars who's practicing Islam goes and marries a brother who is of the Christian faith, and you know, now mind you, brother, the same the same dietary laws we have in Islam and in Judaism is the same dietary laws in Christianity. You ain't supposed to be eating no pork or nothing like that, yeah. But if the sister is, you know, she don't eat pork, she don't do this, certain things she don't, she don't she's not eating scavengers, she ain't eating crabs and lobsters and all that, and that man of hers come home one day and throw some pork up on the counter and say, Babe, I want this for dinner tonight. And she says, Well, I don't eat pork, I'm not even supposed to be touching it. He said, Well, you're gonna touch it tonight because you knew I was eating pork when we met. Oh man, now there's gonna be a problem there, and and and and she's gonna have to deal with that. You can't even run to me as a student minister of the mass with that, because in that instance, I can't tell that man how to run his household, yeah. I cannot. He's the man of the house, and according to the Bible and the Quran, that's his household. Now, if he's getting if he's going outside of parameters and he's putting hands on you and this and that, oh yeah, we can jump in between that, but when it comes down to the laws, rules, and regulations of his household that you may disagree with because it's going against your faith, now you're being challenged, you're in the valley of decision. Oh my god. And vice versa with the man. So I'm only saying that to say these become some of the things that you'll end up, hurdles that you'll end up having to come across, and it's gonna try the relationship, it's gonna it's gonna put pressure on the marriage, and you you know, you may go through a rough time, but if you make it through, y'all be a good tight couple.

SPEAKER_03 55:54

Oh, that's dope, right there. I gotta go back and read this book. Um, and 2021, again, as I mentioned before in our first show, I'm not a registered member of the NOI, but I do adhere to some of their teachings. Um, Minister Nori Mohammed wrote this book before I before you say I do, which I have in my tablets. Okay, yo, that book right there had me thinking. I sat down in the corner, I was like, had you second, like questioning yourself, like yo, whatever what is my role as a man? Like, we all know what a man's supposed to be to protect the provider, you know, yes, secure the family, whatsoever, but there's a lot more put into it.

SPEAKER_00 56:30

That's right, as you said, a lot more is, you know, and brother Nuri, I I I haven't um read the book, even though I have a copy, he's been to the mosque with us, he sold copies there and everything. I helped promote it, but I know he did a thorough job. Oh my god, and he did a thorough job. I I already know that because I know Brother Nuri. That's that's my brother, that's my man, you know. So I know he did a thorough job and he's well studied, and all of it based out of what he got out of the teachings from the from the Honorable Minister Lewis Farcon and the most honorable Logan Muhammad, and you know, and him using his own common sense.

SPEAKER_03 57:04

Yeah, yeah. All you guys have that with you, like, you know, y'all very um studious, like well polished, like you know, epitome of what a man is, man. And I respect that, you know, with the with the brothers, man. Beautiful work is being done over there. I wish.

SPEAKER_00 57:21

I mean, we really strive, brother, to follow the example that's been in front of us in the honorable man Sir Lewis Firecon. And you know, to have a man in front of us and he's been on on this standing on the uh on the front line for 71 years. The minister just turned 93 on Monday.

SPEAKER_03 57:42

Happy happy birthday.

Closing Thanks And Community Invite

SPEAKER_00 57:44

Yeah, man. The minister just turned 93 on Monday, and his he's been a registered member in the Nation of Islam since 1955. So for 71 years, the minister's been standing, brother. Standing. And so on so many different levels, through his growth and development and leadership and the principles of leadership in the name of God, we see him and we say, Man, look, man, that's the best example we've seen. And so we want to emulate that example. It's not like we want to be firacon, but we want to emulate those principles, those standards, because we know he's just a sign of what's in every one of us as black men, what's in every one of us as black women, you know, and so, you know, that's where, you know, of course, at the root of it all is Allah and attributing to the real credit, going to Allah, and then the honorable Aj Mohammed and Minister Farrakhan. Man, I mean, I could I can't speak enough about that because I know I know for myself personally how I was, you know, no different than the next brother coming up in society and growing up in you know the concrete jungle, as we would say, you know, and so and being affected by an environment. But I thank Allah for that man and what he has brought out of me. And what he brings out of us is things that our mothers and fathers had already buried in us, but it just got buried under all the society and stuff, you know. And so, you know, it's it's good to bring it out, you know. Yes, sir.

SPEAKER_03 59:13

I like that, man. Oh, people go back and watch this show. Don't forget to comment, like, share, subscribe, and super chats. I want to give a shout out to the to the chat. I want to give a peace, big shout out, all praises, as you said, to Allah, to my brother, Henry Mohammed coming out for you know giving us a great show. We gotta do a part two, and it's a lot one, yes, sir.

SPEAKER_00 59:33

Bruh, most definitely, man. And we um I'm um I'm gonna be at Mar7C, of course. We're teaching every Sunday, 202 Pennsylvania Avenue, Brooklyn, New York, one 11207. Our address, you can come and be with us at Pennsylvania and Glenmore Sunday mornings, 11 a.m. Our subject matter coming up for this week is uh a torchlight is needed in our community. Yes, he a torchlight. That light of God is needed among us because there's so much going on in our communities now. That knowledge and wisdom of the light, the light that we're talking from right now, throughout this time with you, brother Mike Fever. We we need to have our people understand about this kind of guidance and at least try it on for size. All right, my brother, definitely, definitely, definitely.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:22

We got we gotta check in on that. Yes, sir. Being said, got another show coming up, peace and love. Yes, sir. Peace, brother. Thank you. Peace. God bless. Bless.