Don't Yuck My Yum

Welcome back to Mom Get Off The Wifi. A podcast with two people (Novairz & Bigdaddyfatsax) who became friends over the internet. Finally out of hiatus after years and back with weekly episodes every Thursday!

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Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Mom, get off the Wi-Fi. Get off the Wi-Fi, bitch. Mom! Get off the Wi-Fi! What the f are you doing? Mom! I told you what we're doing again! Get off the f your Wi-Fi! Welcome back to another episode of Mom, get off the Wi-Fi. We are at episode 46 now. For some of you, episode 2. Because the lost files will never come back. Uh the girl Kara from our distributor told us no.

SPEAKER_03 0:31

Damn, bro. You know what we are missing though? We have the Zara episode that's missing, dude. Oh, that's true. That's that's the one episode. We have to get Zara back on.

SPEAKER_02 0:41

True. I mean, she's still our editor.

SPEAKER_03 0:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 0:44

Zara, uh, just put it on the screen. You don't have to tell us. Just put it on the screen. So when we'll we'll know when this is published. Like, dude, her editing is so good, it makes me laugh every time. It is, dude. When I watched it back, yeah, the YouTube. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 0:59

Yes. Your last YouTube video. That was amazing. I mean, to be fair, right? It's not one of those things that, like, first off, this game is taking you way too long to play. Let's like, I okay. Like, I'm not gonna sit here and like, like, be a yes man. Bro, get this shit, lock the fuck down and get this game finished. It's done.

SPEAKER_02 1:17

It's done. God damn, it's done. Okay, so I was like, yeah, this is like I you can tell in it that I'm not having fun anymore. If you guys don't know, I do I do let's plays and shit. So I was playing Poppy Playtime, and it's the last Poppy Playtime. One of the worst chapters, worst games I've ever played in my life. And I'm over here, so like, what's up, YouTube? You know, solve some puzzles with me. And I'm like doing this bullshit. I'm not having a good time at all. I roast the game at the end, but there's only one more video of that, and then it's done. No more of that shit ever. And then I could like do my own thing now. I feel like Poppy Playtime was like something that was just holding me. Like, hey, you can't you can't grow as a as a YouTuber until you finish this shit.

SPEAKER_03 1:58

It's funny that you say that, because now that I think about it, starting, if I were to remember the beginning, yes, it does feel like that momentum is there. But even when I watched this last one, it feels like that like level of just like let's get this shit the fuck over with, bro. But the the crazy part is is it does really well for you. Whatever you like, sit back and you look at like the views and like the engagement of those videos. And by the you know what, bro? Can I you know what? No, fuck that. I'm not even asked for permission. Fuck that random ass dude who was like, it's a good video. It was me gaslighting, it was me going to his comment section and just saying dumb shit, you fucked hard. I wasn't I wasn't even saying anything about no bear. I was saying something about the dumbass kid in the video, and that motherfucker was like, It's a good video. What are you talking about? Go fucking touch grass, nerd. What the fuck?

SPEAKER_02 2:50

Hey, don't say that about my fans. He said he said something on a YouTube video, commented on it, and you know how like Fantas talks. So he's just you know, saying something, and but he didn't even say anything crazy, and someone's like, hey, you shut up. They're like, that's my YouTuber you're talking about. And I just when I saw that, I just smiled because I knew that he was like punching the wall. I was like, this bitch. Like I just I could just see Fantas pacing back and forth, looking at his phone, just being pissed off. He's like, Who's this kid? Who's this virgin? Like, I could just tell that he was mad about it. It is literally I said, Don't do it, bro. Leave it alone, man. Just leave it alone. I was like, please, man, I need this. I think I literally said, I need this.

SPEAKER_03 3:31

Yeah, I it's funny, dude, because like whenever it gets to those moments, there's all like obviously I'm gonna do the better part for the homie. You know what I mean? But it's like I was like, God damn it, dude. What the fuck? This is this fucking nerd got some audacity, bro. Like, it's a fucking joke. That shit is still. That shit had me died. But yeah, man, your your YouTube videos are obviously dope. Um I hope those are what actually gets it uh going for you.

SPEAKER_02 4:00

I think it'll be that combination of everything. Yeah, there's a bunch of stuff that I want to do. I'm excited about it.

SPEAKER_03 4:04

Imagine you getting that first plaque, bro.

SPEAKER_02 4:07

Bro, that'd be so fire. I know somebody who's literally probably about to get their first plaque. Uh solo Noah. Yeah, you don't know. Oh shit. Yeah, yeah. His videos like 297,000 views, all this shit, bro. And he's he's popping off now. I love seeing like someone that like you talk to or knew, or blah blah, at least in the Twitch space. That's how I knew him. I didn't know him like as YouTubers, but yeah, he's going crazy.

SPEAKER_03 4:32

I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, that could be me. See, I I I guess I have to get to that mindset because a lot of the times it's just me like shit posting on other social platforms.

SPEAKER_02 4:44

You should you should shit post on the ones that make you money because you do post. I see you, and I'm like, oh, imagine if you just did this on like YouTube or something. I'm not saying everything revolves around money, I'm just saying it'd be like a nice growth, like right? Pause.

SPEAKER_03 5:01

Like it'd be cool, it'd be cool. It it would, and that's it, and that's the thing to me. It's just so easy to like on that one platform just to be like record, post, and then that's done. You know what I mean? On the other ones, I feel like there's a little bit more work involved, you know. Oh, that's what I will say. Your YouTube shorts are actually going crazy, dude. Have you looked at those? Yeah, from time to time. Yeah, no, but it's YouTube shorts. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know about YouTube shorts. To be fair, the most the most like shine I've ever gotten was from either IG, well, technically it was all from IG, you know what I mean? So it's like I mean, that's a good way to promote too.

SPEAKER_02 5:46

I mean, people say yeah, YouTube and Instagram you should do together. Supposedly, from this one YouTube video that I watched like the other day, it was like, Do you want to be a YouTuber? I've been watching so many of those.

SPEAKER_01 5:57

Yeah, yeah, I was like, Yes, I do, I do.

SPEAKER_02 6:00

What do I do? Step one. I've been watching a lot of those, you know.

SPEAKER_03 6:05

I watch I watch a lot of those at night, but it's always like how to build an airplane. You know what I mean? And I like I feel like I need to shift my focus away from that.

SPEAKER_02 6:13

It should be opposite. I should be I should be looking that up.

SPEAKER_03 6:17

Yours should be like how to destroy an airplane or towers, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02 6:21

This is like yeah, but that's like in the blood. I need something new to learn. Okay. You know, we try to expand. Um that sounds crazy, guys. I'm not, I'm not what you think I am. Um boy meets plane. You know what? I thought about the other day. I was like, Boy meets world. Okay, I look like a character from Boy Meets World right now, but I was like, have they ever had any Indian people? And then I really thought about it. I didn't even look it up. I just sat there and I thought. And they do. It was when it was when Eric Matthews was too scared to get his GED. So he started doing like the security guard stuff, and his mom's like, Eric, you need a high school diploma. And then he's uh and then he's like doing the security for the people that are in the class that are about to take their like GED test or whatever. And uh there's this one Indian security security guard out there, and then he sits down, he starts opening up a GED study guidebook, and he's like, Hey, what are you doing? He's like, My family came to this country for me. It's like a whole a whole thing for me. I'm I I'm an engineer, and he's like, he's like, he's all like, oh wait, so you're Orya engineer and then can do it all over again here, and he's like, America, your dreams, dreams are here, and then like he is the reason that an Indian guy is the reason that Eric Matthews got his GED. So big ups, fam. Wow, you know, okay, yeah, okay, other than that, not one. I don't know. I don't know if there's any other. So he had about like one good minute of screen time, but other than that, I don't know if there is. There might be, I'm just not sure. You know what I saw today? Wait, this is a rate, this is random as hell. But I was on TikTok, and then it was just uh this kid, and his mom was like, ew, to like what he was eating or something, and he said, Don't yuck my yum. And I was like, Oh, that's uh that's clever. I've never heard of that, yuck my yum. And I don't know why. I was like, Oh, I think I'm gonna start saying that. And I was like, where did it come from? Is it from like a movie or something, you know? And I looked it up and it said BDSM. And I was like, what the fuck, bro? What I don't even know about BDS. That's like uh bondage, right? Yeah, I don't know why. I just love it. If something like talk shit on something that I love, I'm like, don't yuck my yum. I like it.

SPEAKER_03 8:34

Yeah, I just sound crazy, bro. What do you mean? Like the the more that you the way that you're saying it right now, yeah, just sounds wild. What are you thinking of? Say it, say it. Don't yuck my yum. Okay, now say it the way you just said it, though. Don't yuck it. Not that, not that time, but don't yuck my yum. Nah, you said it a little more you said it a little more sensual the first time, bro.

SPEAKER_02 8:57

Don't yuck my yum.

SPEAKER_03 8:58

Like, you're like, don't yuck my yum.

SPEAKER_02 9:00

I didn't mean it like that. If I hadn't, that was not my intentions. I don't think I ever said it like that. First of all, that's not at all what I was thinking in any way. But think about it, you could use it in sexual ways too. All right, if anybody does watch my Let's Plays, stop listening right now. Because I don't know what age demographic watches my Let's Plays. But you know, if if a girl is like, you know, going down on you and then like you do the thing and she spits it out, and like, don't. But no, that sounds like you like eating your own shit. No, no, no, never mind, never mind. Never mind, never mind, never mind. Wait, wait. I didn't connect the dots before I started. I just started talking. I started talking first and didn't think. No, no, never mind. I swear to you. I gotta think before I talk. That sounds like I like to eat my own shit. Or not my shit, but you know. Which I don't, which I don't.

SPEAKER_01 9:53

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 9:55

But we're it started off with him loving the phrase, and then it was like it slowly turned into like, yo, that's that phrase sounds kind of crazy.

SPEAKER_02 10:02

It's a it's a good phrase. I think it's a good phrase to use. I think it's a good one, you know?

SPEAKER_03 10:06

I don't know, man. I don't it could be, I don't know. Why why are you so against this? He's gonna have a protest. I he's gonna No, I'm just saying, bro, like it has to be one of those things that's used at the right time, you know what I mean? It like this like the timing has to be perfect in order for you to use it for it to be good.

SPEAKER_02 10:28

Okay, like what situation, what situation for you would it be like you heard it in that situation, you'd be like, Oh yeah, that's that's that's dope.

SPEAKER_03 10:35

You said, okay, you know what? You cooking up, you chefing something up, right? You're like, hey, try this for me. And they're like, Oh, yeah. They're like, uh, hey, don't yuck my yucky. I mean, that's exactly hard to make this shit good. Yeah, yeah, that's exactly how I would use it. No, but that's not you didn't you gotta put you gotta put the context there because you didn't make it sound like that was the way that you were gonna use it. You made it sound like I didn't I did not mean anything sexual until you brought up sexuality.

SPEAKER_01 11:00

You were gonna say it the way that you were gonna say it, then you stopped. That's it.

SPEAKER_02 11:04

No, because that's what I thought you were thinking of, but that's not exact that's not at all how I was I was thinking of it. I was being wholesome about it, and then while I was being wholesome and went to BDSM, and I was like, it doesn't have to be. So yeah, it it it it's got potential, bro. It's got potential. I think you think the kids are gonna start saying it. I think they are.

SPEAKER_03 11:23

I hope they don't. Why? Because, bro, you like kids, you have to remember, kids these days are so brainwrought around everything that it will turn in like everything always starts off as good intention, but it always ends up being horrible. You know what I mean? So it's like there's a rule.

SPEAKER_02 11:43

The rule 40 something. You ever heard of that? No, it's a rule forty something. If it exists, there's porn of it. Is that what you mean? What I swear to you, it's called like rule 40. I didn't find 48 or 45 or something like that. 44, maybe. I mean, I don't know who made the rule. I think someone who made the rule is just like I don't know, maybe a little sick.

SPEAKER_03 12:04

Say you came up with a phrase today, right? And and you knew, and your core following knew that you were the person to come up with it, that there would be some type of gratification or glorify or glorifying. Or you just think everybody just goes about their business like Novares ain't come up with that shit, you know.

SPEAKER_02 12:25

One time I used a word that my friend used on stream, and it was jammers, you know? He's like, You ain't talking about titties, say jammers, and I said jammers one time, and then the next day, like I don't know where I got it from. I was like, Oh, it's probably like in the friend group, everyone just says that shit. I wasn't like, oh, this person made it. Let me go and thank you for this phrase that you just bestowed onto my ears. Like, there's there's none of none of that shit going on. And then, but then he got mad at me for like what am I supposed to credit somebody after using that word? And then what's insane at the time this person streamed, and I watched his stream, and he told a story to he told a story to his stream that never happened to him, but he pretended he was me in that story, and I was like, You're gonna get mad at me for saying jammers, but you said a whole story and you pretended to be me. What's more weird? What's more weird, man? That's insane. Just stole your whole flow. There was a story about the the stripper who was talking to me, and I asked her if she had Cool Ranch Doritos earlier. And she said, Yeah. Because her breath smelled like Cool Ranch Doritos when she's talking. Yeah, and that was the story. And then he was like, Man, one time I went to a strip club, and I'm like, wait, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_01 13:43

I was like, I remember the story because you weren't there. It was me. You're soldier boy in this scenario, bro. Stole my whole flow. Stole my whole flow.

SPEAKER_02 13:54

What the hell?

SPEAKER_03 13:56

And I can't say jammers. Whoa. Nah. Whenever, whenever I say, or whatever said, like, how are you doing, or whatever, and something's like, Oh, I'm good, I'm good. How about you? Um Gucci, like a fat lib coochie. Who the fuck did that come from, bro?

SPEAKER_02 14:09

That's you. And that's a crazy bar. Well, uh, one time I thought about uh the phrase, man, you make my dick itch. And then I was like, Oh, that's fad sax. So I didn't I didn't say it. I was like, that's his.

SPEAKER_03 14:21

But I didn't, that's not something. Who did I steal that from? See? Notice how you can't remember. Notice how you can't remember, though. But no, no, this proves my point. I know who cares who started it. I know, I know. I stole that from Kevin Hart, bro. Oh, really? That's Kevin Hart. Yeah, he says it he says it in original stand-up. And I know Kevin Hart's a touchy subject right now, but I stole it from an original stand-up that he did. Yeah, people are mad at him. Damn, I don't should I say this right now? Because that's gonna sound crazy. What'd he do? Zara cut here.

SPEAKER_02 15:00

I'm not saying rhythm is a bad friend.

SPEAKER_03 15:02

I'm just saying there's others that are probably doing that that don't call me, you know. I feel like there's levels to the friendship part, right? I feel like there's levels to the friendship part. Because I have I have one homie, I've known him probably how am I 35? I've known him probably for 30 years, bro. Since you were five to this day, I'll take me in Trav G. He's the only person who sends me like reels that I actually enjoy. Okay, because it's like it's it's a mixture of dogs are you this every now and then, right?

SPEAKER_02 15:38

So are you guys friends? Yeah, I guess anybody could be a friend.

SPEAKER_03 15:42

I mean, no, I mean in that in that case if anybody knows how I am, you know how I am. You you know I don't like people, bro. Like so, if I if I communicate with you on a regular basis, especially enough to like actually watch the reels that you send me, then yes, you would have to you you would actually have to be a friend. Because I'll tell you right now, bro. I have somebody who sends me probably like 12 reels a day, and I do not watch a single one of that.

SPEAKER_02 16:13

Okay, okay. So okay, so that doesn't define it. That doesn't define it. Okay, that's fine.

SPEAKER_03 16:18

No, it doesn't. Because I'll tell you, like, in the friend that I'm talking about, he'll send me like three or four reels a day, but they're quality reels, bro. They're reality reels. They're reels that motherfuckers would feel guilty about laughing at, and I don't.

SPEAKER_02 16:35

Yeah, because you're a sick person. That's why that's a sweet. I'm so happy you don't send me reels anymore, man. I'm like, that there is well, it was one reels of like boogers and stuff, and I was like, I don't want to fucking see that shit. Like, bro, that's the only person that I would respond to, but I actively had to not respond to was Fat Sacks. It was because the reels were so disgusting. I didn't want to see any of them. Not one. I was like, but this is nasty, or somebody dying. And I was like, I don't want to, I don't want to see any of them. Why do I want to like what the hell?

SPEAKER_03 17:08

And I know this is gonna make me sound like a horrible person, bro, but those are like my fake, because those are like the craziest reels, you know what I mean? Because it's like, yo, how did bro die like that? Like, how did you know what I mean? And it's like, I know it sounds bad, but it's just one of those things that's like like bro, I'll tell you to this day, I know the one video that'll make Safe laugh, and that's that one dude getting squitting slow-mo squished in the garage.

SPEAKER_02 17:33

You know what I mean? There's this one video you posted, and it was a safe look alike. If you guys don't know, Safe, uh, he's a streamer, youtuber. Uh he's been on this before, but those are the lost episodes that you guys can't hear. Uh, but I think there's a it should be on YouTube if you guys want to watch it. But uh there's it's if Zara, if you could put up a picture of him and are you able to still find that? I actually downloaded it just in case he's perfect, perfect. If you could put that up and then put that next to it, it literally looks like he time traveled or like when came back.

SPEAKER_03 18:08

Imagine, imagine, imagine having knowing somebody exists that's an older version of you, and all he is is some broke ass dude working working in a sweatshop.

SPEAKER_01 18:23

No, but he's probably he's probably undercover. He's probably undercover.

SPEAKER_03 18:27

So I want to talk about this thing, and I saw it. I don't know if it's real. I don't know if it's real, but obviously we live in a day and age where everybody fucking vapes to a certain degree.

SPEAKER_02 18:38

Uh-huh. Right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 18:39

Obviously, it's getting to the point where it appeals to the younger demographic.

SPEAKER_02 18:44

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 18:45

I saw this post, and it was literally uh like a like a confiscation.

SPEAKER_02 18:55

Confiscation?

SPEAKER_03 18:55

Confiscated? Confiscation, yeah. Confiscation. Confiscation. Confiscated. It was like a pile of vapes, bro.

SPEAKER_02 19:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 19:04

Confiscated from middle schoolers.

SPEAKER_02 19:06

Jesus. Middle school?

SPEAKER_03 19:08

And in the middle of it, in the middle of it, I was like, this kid's a fucking icon in the middle of all these vapes. Yeah. Right? All these fucking mangoes, these pineapples, these citrus, the like all these flavored vapes, bro. In the middle of it. So black and mild was a soft pack of new ports, bro.

SPEAKER_02 19:28

Oh, let's go. The kids are gonna be that kid's gonna be alright.

SPEAKER_03 19:32

A fucking legend, bro. You know what I mean? Like, yeah, I'm not gonna sit here and say I cosign kids doing bad choices. No, of course not. If we're gonna say that there's one kid who has his head on straight, it's the kid with the new the soft pack new portion.

SPEAKER_02 19:50

For real. You know, that's he, that's the difference. He's falling in the own beat of his own drum. Everyone over here is smoking mangoes and shit, and he's over here listening to Tupac give me a cigarette. Dog, like, you know, he's over here, like, he's really doing it.

SPEAKER_03 20:04

That gave me like an ounce of hope from the game. Hell yeah. That was so uh that made me feel so proud to be like, alright, cool, there's still some hope left.

SPEAKER_02 20:15

Was everybody praising the the Newports in the comments?

SPEAKER_03 20:20

I I looked in the comments.

SPEAKER_02 20:21

That kid's gonna die from cancer because now he's gonna see that and he's gonna be like, oh wait, this is this is really cool. Bro, he's cooked.

SPEAKER_03 20:30

He's gonna take you to the next level, bro. I used to love Newports. I used to love can like camel crutches, I used to love cools. I used to, that was my shit before I turned to the black and all phase. You know what I mean? What the fuck? No, uh actually, you know what? Now that you said that, there was one thing that I have me to look up. What could it be?

SPEAKER_02 20:56

What could it be? You know, somebody I work, literally, uh the person I work with, he sits right next to me, and I was like, hey, uh, I like sports now. Uh you know, I'm trying to make friends out here. And then uh I was talking about UFC shit and blah blah blah, and I was talking about Ray J getting knocked out, and then uh then uh I was he was talking about like something about basketball, and then I was like, uh I try to get in basketball, I still am, but like all this flopping stuff, like for some reason it like kind of pisses me off a little bit, and then like it's annoys me, and he's like, Yeah, that's why I only watch the WNBA. And I was like, that's the first time I've ever heard that.

SPEAKER_03 21:35

He watches okay, wait, hold on. Because that that was crazy. It's true. This is what he said for W for WNBA supporters that my reaction wasn't what y'all thought it was. I'm sorry. That was just for those. I don't know what's going on, you know. I'm sorry. I'm sure WNBA is great, bro, because every time I turn it on, it's not for me.

SPEAKER_02 22:00

But you know, I'm sure there's a whole lot because every time I turn it on, it's not for me.

SPEAKER_03 22:05

In what way was that supposed to be like uh hey bro, I'm just I'm just saying, but what I will say because there, bro, there's girls out there, obviously, who can outplay me. I'm not gonna sit here and say, like, I'm the best NBA player to ever exist. Obviously, I'd be in the fucking league.

SPEAKER_02 22:21

I don't watch the UFC thinking that I could beat somebody up in there.

SPEAKER_03 22:25

But you're gonna have an opinion about it, right? You're gonna be like, oh, fucking true, you know, Masvedal sucks ass, or so-and-so is you know what I mean? And I'm not saying Masvedal, you do suck ass, you actually are pretty great, but you're the first one that came up at the top of my head. So he's actually like everybody in sports is like listening and about to come at him right now. Yeah, bro. You know what I mean? I I there's great WNBA players out there. I just I just can't watch it. It's like to me, it's the most slow-moving, anticlimactic thing I could ever like lay eyes on. I would rather watch golf than watch WNBA. But here we are. Like I said, Spurs, Thunder, okay, you being an empath, who's winning?

SPEAKER_02 23:10

Not knowing anything. Me with my empathy, like I need to know a little bit, just the tiniest bit with names. Like, I'm not I'm not, I can't tell the future, I'm not a fortune teller. Okay, I need like I need like little things, just little tiny things, not statistics. Uh well, I don't know. I don't know. What do you think I should know? I'm not, I don't need to make an educated guess, so you don't need to tell me statistics. Oh, they've done this well, they've done this well. No, just some stuff about them, you know.

SPEAKER_03 23:36

So they the Spurs blew out the Thunder. I feel like they blew out because it was like a 20-point loss game six. Now, if I'm not mistaken, I can't know this.

SPEAKER_02 23:48

I can't know this.

SPEAKER_03 23:49

Like, what color are their jerseys? Okay, uh, the Spurs are gold, I mean gold, are black and silver. Okay, spurs, black and silver. The thunder is blue and like orange-ish.

SPEAKER_02 24:00

Okay, that's all I need to know.

SPEAKER_03 24:02

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 24:02

He said spurs are with your hands. It's like it's like a balance. It's like it's it's like a balance. Well, he says spurs are black and gold.

SPEAKER_03 24:13

Silver.

SPEAKER_02 24:14

Silver.

SPEAKER_03 24:15

Silver.

SPEAKER_02 24:15

This is blue and orange.

unknown 24:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:18

Black and silver. That's winning.

SPEAKER_03 24:19

So spurs are winning. Spurs are winning. They're going to the finals.

SPEAKER_02 24:22

For fucking sure.

SPEAKER_03 24:23

I'll bet. Now that you now that so since you're so confident, since you're so confident, and this is actually kind of the the twist here. Uh-huh. This is the twist here. You win Spurs because they're black and silver. They're going to play the Knicks in the finals, which is also basically orange and blue. The same thing. Oh, yeah. Orange and orange and blue. No. So the Spurs are winning it all.

SPEAKER_02 24:46

Yeah, what kind of color combination is that?

SPEAKER_03 24:48

Okay. Hey.

SPEAKER_02 24:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 24:50

I'm just, I mean, that color combination won last year. They won the finals last year. The orange and blue.

SPEAKER_02 24:55

It's the big two six right now. I'm not talking about last year. Hey. I'm talking about now. I'm talking about now.

SPEAKER_01 25:02

Okay. This dude just went over a whole brown demographic just off of color base.

SPEAKER_02 25:07

I'm telling you, I just need something. Like, you know, like those people that like, God, what is it? Some like superhero, and they just need to like, oh, this is like a shirt they wore, and they they touch the shirt and they can just know everything about them?

SPEAKER_03 25:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:19

That's what just happened to me.

SPEAKER_00 25:21

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 25:21

That's all I need to know. Like, you can tell me statistics, but I feel like that's not fair. If you're going off of my empath skills, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_03 25:29

Uh uh, what is it? De'Aaron Fox? How many did you get uh his jersey, bro?

SPEAKER_02 25:34

Who? Darren Fox?

SPEAKER_03 25:36

De'Aaron Fox? Yeah, he's the point guard for the Spurs.

SPEAKER_02 25:40

Okay. Wait, why?

SPEAKER_03 25:42

Just to show your support. Okay, just to see how much does it cost? The choices you've made. How much does it cost?

SPEAKER_02 25:50

Like, how much to get one?

SPEAKER_03 25:51

Oh, his I mean, his jersey right now is probably fucking stupid. 80 to 140, you know?

SPEAKER_02 26:04

Okay. So it's either that or my chain that I'm thinking about getting. So it's one of it's one of them.

SPEAKER_03 26:10

Bro, you you hitting me up earlier today, or you hitting us up? Because I'm not gonna say it was just a conversation with me and you, you hitting us up earlier and being like, yo, I'm thinking about getting a chain. You know, and I was like, like, go to this website, get a chain, bro. I you know what, bro? Have you have you ever seen ATL? Yeah, fake it till you make it, bro. Fake it till you make it. Well, like, I don't you know what happened? I'm not gonna sit, I'm not gonna sit here and say get a whole fucking like diamond-plated fake chain. You know, I just use some stainless steel. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_02 26:41

Yeah, I could get some stainless steel. Because like the thing is, uh, when you sent me that, I was like, how much is it? Like 120 or something like that. You could get something around there. And I was yeah, before prior to that, I was looking up on Amazon for eight dollars and nine dollar chains. I was like, I was like, okay, I was like, oh, the picture looks good, but the thing is like I don't even know if I can rock a chain, I don't know if I'm chain rockable. Like, you get what I'm saying? So, like, I don't know if I'm gonna like do that the whole way because I don't know if I can rock a chain like that. But you know why?

SPEAKER_03 27:12

Listen, go like oh yeah, you can fuck with a chain, bro. Okay, you can fuck with a chain.

SPEAKER_02 27:17

Cause I was thinking the this happened because I saw I got this new Koo Neck sweater that I really like, and I'm like, man, a chain would be really nice with this. That's what I was thinking. Yeah, and then I was like, chain. And I was like in my head, I was like, I don't know why I was like, I was like, Zara might know. So I said in like our group thing, but I was like, I know Fat Tex for sure wears chains, so he'll know. And then if he won't be listening, because you know he's probably sending reels to 14 other people, but like rhythm also, like way before sent me a site to like uh for change and stuff. I forgot what it was called.

SPEAKER_03 27:50

But yeah, when he sent you some GLD shit, GLD, that's that's what it was. That's what it was. That's what it was.

SPEAKER_02 27:56

But yeah, I don't know about like sizes when he asked like what size you want. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know anything about that.

SPEAKER_03 28:02

So I'll tell you right now, bro. I'll tell you right now, I would like homie to homie, not no, not no fucked up shit. You got a uh a wide base neck, cubic, cubic. Yeah, that's what I wanted. That's what I wanted. Cuban, like eight, ten, twelve millimeters, something thick, right? Some thick. Look, put a little, put a little head, put a little weight on your chest, but not not like not like head, not like low, right? Because this is this is like an 18. Yeah. Yeah. Something that that goes right underneath your your neck. That's important. Literally, what I'm thinking.

SPEAKER_02 28:41

That's what that's what I want. I don't want something like the chain hang low. I don't want nothing like that. Like I just, you know, I just want to do that. I just want to go get it. But like, yeah, just something that just lays like around here, like around here. You know what I mean? Collarbone area, like to the max. But if it's lower than that, it doesn't look weird, bro. On me, I think. Bro, can can I tell you something?

SPEAKER_03 29:06

And I know you're probably gonna be like, fuck, here y'all go again. Huh. I feel like if you got swole, bro, that's the goal. I mean you would be undefeated. You'd be the what does that mean?

SPEAKER_02 29:20

Because Rhythm also said literally like two weeks ago, it's like, man, if Novere got swole, dude, the way he is, and if he gets swole, I don't even know what's gonna happen. What the hell does that mean? What does that even mean?

SPEAKER_03 29:35

You would be snatching up bitches out the street, bro. I'd be like, that's actually really nice. That's so sweet. I mean, you got the you got the skin color, right? You got the beard, you got the hair, you got the glasses, you got the skin. You put a chain on with some shoulder definition. You know what I mean? Bro, you'd be snatching bitches out the shh bro. You'd be unstoppable. All right, that's the goal. You'd be the fucking Well, see, you know what I heard?

SPEAKER_02 30:03

Your personality is so good, it's so amazing that if you just locked in physically, you're unstoppable. That means you think my personality is so good. What the fuck?

SPEAKER_03 30:14

No. I 100% agree. Oh shit. Hell yeah. That's really nice. 100% agree, bro. Damn, why you all them bitches you all them bitches you propose to on Twitch, bro, they'd be coming lining up, dog. You'd have seven wives before the end of the day.

SPEAKER_02 30:27

Oh, no, all that was fake. So if one of them's listening, please do not line up anywhere near me. Please do not.

SPEAKER_01 30:36

You know, I mean I was trying to throw them a bow now, bro. You done shot that shit down.

SPEAKER_02 30:41

It's just when you know, you know. And I may be fat, but I'm picky. You know, maybe fat, but I'm a picky eater. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yo, that's like a Rick Ross line, you know? Uh I want that Kiki Palmer, Sean Evans love. Because I've been so parasocial with that shit. I've been so parasocial about that shit. I was like, but I know Kiki Palmer is gonna play my boy Sean Evans, bro. Oh, yeah, 100%.

SPEAKER_03 31:08

Yeah, she is.

SPEAKER_02 31:09

But like, I but it would be so nice if like that was like, oh, and it was great. Man, but I'd be seeing shit, and I'm like, this is beautiful, this is amazing. Like, you know, he's making he's making her mom laugh. Come on, that's wild, and then they're like all from like Chicago and shit. Well, he's from like Crystal Lake, and then she was in talking, she's like, You're from Crystal Lake, and I'm from here, and you know, like there's this all this wholesome shit, bro. I don't even know. I fucking blacked out at one point. I don't know what the hell they're talking about, but like it was so amazing, and they were laughing and shit, bro. They need they need to be together. What the fuck is happening? And she's commenting on other people's posts of them talking about being together, and Kiki Bahmer's like, y'all crazy. Shut up and go do something.

SPEAKER_03 31:54

Like, come on, have you seen that? Or are you just saying it? She likes white chocolate, bro. No, okay, so I saw the video of them reacting to their hot ones episode. Oh, okay, and that was so crazy because like chemistry like that is hard to fake, bro. Yeah, you know what I mean? Dude, they were playing Twister the other day. They were playing what? Twister. Oh, I thought you said Twister. I was like, what the what the fuck does Twister have to do? No, like Twister, like that game, they like I was like, okay, so the music, like, alright, cool. All them moments where he was like on fire from eating all that hot shit made him so smooth for that.

SPEAKER_02 32:33

So smooth, bro. He got game. That's wild. Oh, but see, I I know his type now, bro. Why can't you be like that? Yeah, you just told me everything about my personality was great. What the what happened now? But you're still single. Okay. We can we can get into this if you if you really want to.

SPEAKER_01 32:51

Yo, I'm so sorry. No, we can get into this if you want to do it. If you want if you want to, okay? We don't need to do this. Okay, we don't need to do this. We get into the end, we don't need to do this right now.

SPEAKER_02 33:02

Holy, I don't even know what I was talking about. You bought you about brother, I love you. We don't need to do this. First of all, let me make something clear, okay, to the listeners, and supposedly fat says, okay? Some of y'all grow up and y'all like, this is what I want. Getting married was never my plan A. Never my plan B. Maybe a plan C. Since I've known myself and it's been a while, okay? I've been trying to do something creative or this or that, blah, blah, blah. You know, if you act like, just act like there's a nobody here that's like, oh, I'm so ugly, nobody wanna date me. That's not the issue. The issue is I don't want to date them. Because I'm too busy going for my plan A, my plan B. You are a plan C, a plan B.

SPEAKER_03 33:55

You bitches ain't shit. It's just my priorities are different. You bitches ain't shit.

SPEAKER_02 34:00

No, my priorities are different. If there was. If there was a thing where it's like, oh shit, yeah, sure. Sure. But I'm too focused on something that I want, and I don't like not getting what I want. So I'm gonna try to get what I want. So if I really want some girl, I'm gonna do everything, you know, to try to woo her. She's just gonna, and she's just gonna fall into place, or she'll leave me, who knows, or cheat on me, or something. We haven't got there yet. We have no idea.

SPEAKER_01 34:31

I'm so confident. You are so confident of it for that last point, bro. Yeah, yeah. You were so you were like, you were there, and then you're like, or you know.

SPEAKER_02 34:45

Damn, bro. I'm just saying, you know. That's wild. We live in the real world, but my priority is a little different. That's you know what I mean? You get what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_03 34:52

Hey, bro. Nino, you you got me. That's what I will say. You got me, right?

SPEAKER_02 34:58

And this is I'm not saying anything to anybody else. I'm just saying, I'm the only one that gets shit for this. I don't be going like, oh, you're married. I don't be saying that shit. Like, you know what I mean? I'm just you have said that. No, but in a in a an amazing way. I'm like, oh, y'all married. Like that. No. When when have I flashback? Fatsax being in love with his wife is so gay. And a flashback.

SPEAKER_03 35:20

You throw it in, you th you throw it in my face one time because it was like we were talking about something. You're like, Fantax, fuck you. You're married. You don't know what it's like to be single these days. Blah blah blah blah blah. You said. Alright, man.

SPEAKER_02 35:32

The only reason I said that is because the only reason I said that because rhythm was there.

SPEAKER_01 35:36

There's no there's no way I would just dump it in rhythm. There's no way I would say that rhythm wasn't there, bro. That's so wild, bro. I see, every everybody wants what FatSecs has. And so FatSecs says some shit. No, I'm I'm not I'm not saying it's terrible.

SPEAKER_02 35:53

He has a great life. That's great. That's a good thing. I'm not shitting on it. I'm not doing anything like that. And if and if anything, if anything, Rhythm was doing it, and I was like, yeah. Okay. Okay. And he was the one that was saying it. I'm like, yeah, he's right. Okay. That's the only, that's the only thing. You know, other than that, why why would somebody else's happiness make me upset? You spending time with your girl means uh you spending less time with me. Don't do that. Don't point at me like that. That was not gay. You wouldn't spend time with the homies, bro. No, why'd you pause? Why did you pause? You paused, you made it weird. You made it weird. That sounded crazy. No, you made it crazy. It didn't sound crazy. You made it weird.

SPEAKER_03 36:39

Zara, put your answer. Did that sound crazy? Put your answer right here. Yes or no, that did not sound crazy. That sounded crazy. When you're fighting. I feel like there's a good balance. I feel like there's a good bal there is from how much time, from how much time I give to you, because I'll you know what? Fuck you. Because I'll say this right now. I'll send you, I'll text you something, or I'll send you something, and you won't respond for days until it's convenient for you, until it's convenient for you to send something back. That's not true. I've changed. But I've okay, how do I fucking know that? Because something still has changed. What do you mean? I talk when all the time.

SPEAKER_02 37:22

What are you talking about? Okay, I'm talking about change at this.

SPEAKER_03 37:25

We talked about this, we talked about this last time on the on the redacted episodes. We need to get a couple's therapist in here, bro.

SPEAKER_02 37:34

I'm down. I'm so down. I'm so down because I feel like I just get jumped all the time. You know what I mean? You guys gotta remember what what I just what is you know, there's my plan A, you know, my plan B. And I then I do respond. You know, I do respond. Now is what you're saying. Prior to this, you didn't. What do you mean? What what do you mean? What where's the point where I didn't? I always do.

SPEAKER_03 37:58

Besides the last month, there was times where I would send him or talk to him, and it was just me talking to myself.

SPEAKER_02 38:09

Don't ever say that. That's a lie. Don't say that.

SPEAKER_03 38:12

That's so crazy.

SPEAKER_02 38:13

No, don't do that. I'ma cry. Don't do that. Don't fucking do that. You're a lot.

SPEAKER_03 38:21

Look at the Instagram reels. No, Instagram's different.

SPEAKER_02 38:24

Instagram go to hell. I'm talking about text Discord. I'm not talking about no fucking Instagram. I don't look at I don't look at my I don't look at my own cousin's shit on Instagram. I don't look at nobody's shit on Instagram. I'm trying right now to like be on my shit on Instagram recently, and I'm still not doing well. I'm not doing well.

SPEAKER_03 38:41

I still have missed, like, I have hold on, dude. What I will say is if he's in the moment and he wants attention from the homie, he will give it his all. Well, I am a Gemini. Once he's done, like I don't, he's done. Like he did, he won't respond to you until something else comes up of interest for him.

SPEAKER_02 39:00

See, that's crazy. Everyone talks shit about a Gemini, they know a Gemini, but they meet a Gemini and they don't want them to be a Gemini. I'm a Gemini. All right. You never believe in that shit.

SPEAKER_01 39:10

Okay. Don't bel, don't like, don't ever believe any of the shit he says about being a Gemini because he does not believe in that shit.

SPEAKER_03 39:18

He uses that shit when it benefits him for shit exactly like this, bro. Outside that, he's like, what the fuck do you care about astrology for? Astrology, astronomy, escophy, whatever the fuck it is, uh game, game five, game six, whatever. Like, he doesn't believe that shit, bro. It he does it for his convenience. So next anytime you bitches out here think you got him on the hook, don't believe it, bro. No. Uh all I'm saying is no, no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_02 39:50

All I'm saying is, I never uh meant to make you feel alone. You know, I never meant to like not do that. That was my intention.

SPEAKER_03 40:00

You'll never make me feel alone because I have something you don't have, and that's a marriage. And two kids. How you feel now?

SPEAKER_02 40:07

I don't have plan A, B, or C. But we're on our way, okay? Okay. I swear my god.

SPEAKER_03 40:15

My fault. No, I'm sorry, man.

SPEAKER_02 40:18

It doesn't hurt my feelings.

SPEAKER_03 40:19

That's fine. You might you're my brother. My brother dick like 18 inches.

SPEAKER_02 40:23

Oh my god. I'm a grower.

SPEAKER_03 40:26

Have you seen where they're making boxers specifically for growers and not showers?

SPEAKER_02 40:30

What?

SPEAKER_03 40:31

Wait. Yeah. Wait, why? Like, what is the difference? I don't know. It just popped up on my TikTok the other day. It was like some growth, and she was that's not weird. She was like, like, did y'all know that there is boxers specifically for growers and not showers? And she was like, you know, it comes in a pack of 20 or whatever the case is. Pack of 20 is crazy.

SPEAKER_02 40:52

Nah, there's what is it gonna even be? I don't even understand. It'd be like a fake penis.

SPEAKER_03 40:57

I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 40:58

Yeah, I'm wearing hard, hard fucking alter boxers. Like, you know what I mean? I'm good. I'm good. You know, I'll just be honest. You know, instead, I'll just be honest and be like, hey, I'm a grower, not a shower. You know, that makes it a lot easier, you know? There's nothing wrong with that. It makes it more, it makes it more magical. Does it? Yeah, because I don't I don't think I'm like a terrible size. I think I'm a decent size, you know. Like, yeah, but since I'm a grower, not a shower, there's so much more growing and magic to happen. You know what I mean? So like you know, sometimes girls are like, oh okay, I don't want to get too Zara's editing this. This is like that's the problem. Like this point, we have to send it. We have to send it to somebody else to edit this part. Okay, well, you know, you know, sometimes you're with the girl and I'm like, oh, you know what I mean? I can't even say it. I'm trying to say you know, sometimes they're like, oh, let me suck it till it's hard. You know what I mean? Yeah, so there's a lot more magic happening like on my shit. Because they're like, how did it get this big? Like, you know what I mean? How did this even happen? So it's like like magic.

SPEAKER_03 42:12

Two fingers soft and a whole hand hard, you know what I mean? Which is like crazy.

SPEAKER_02 42:18

Wait, what?

SPEAKER_03 42:18

What'd you say? I didn't even listen. Wait, two fingers soft and a whole hand hard, bro. It's like it's it's a whole fucking difference, you know what I mean? I got I got this Harry Potter dick. You know what I mean? That's all I'm trying to say. Harry Potter dick? It's magical. Oh wow. Yeah. Is it like Gryffindor or is it Slytherin? Or is it Hufflepuff?

SPEAKER_02 42:37

Or is it not Hufflepuff? Don't ever call my dick Hufflepuff.

SPEAKER_03 42:40

That's crazy. That I mean, that's what they're doing on it. They Huffle, they Huffle in the couple. My dick isn't Hufflepuff.

SPEAKER_02 42:49

I would say a mix of Slytherin and uh a mix of Slytherin, but it's not that skinny. You know what I mean? A mix of Slytherin and like uh what's the other one? What's the first one you said? Gryffindors?

SPEAKER_03 43:00

Gryffindor, yeah. There's four. It's Hufflepuff, Gryffindor, Slytherin. And there's a blue one, Ravenclaw. Ravenclaw. Never Ravenclaw.

SPEAKER_02 43:10

That's prude dick.

SPEAKER_03 43:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 43:12

Like, you know, that's like that's prude dick. It has to be. And I picked Ravenclaw in the Harry Potter game. I did. But yeah. That's like straight edge. That's like you know, Ravenclaw, straight edge.

SPEAKER_03 43:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 43:27

They're just regular, like the NPCs of Harry Potter.

SPEAKER_03 43:30

I feel that. That's that's a solid foundation, actually. Now that you say that, it's the reason why we forgot them.

SPEAKER_02 43:37

Like, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, my dick will not be forgotten. So I refuse to be Ravenclaw dick, okay?

SPEAKER_03 43:43

What is it, bro? Hold on. Cause now you have me thinking, right? Because it's not like you can't do fucking like what is it? Um, Star Wars. You know what I mean? You can't do dark side light. This that shit don't make sense. You know what I mean? You can't do Lord of Of the Rings because it's like that makes it sound like you just have cock rings on.

SPEAKER_02 44:04

I haven't even seen all of Lord of the Rings or Star Wars either. So I couldn't, I wouldn't even be able to. Well, you know, okay. Somebody came at me for not watching Star Wars because I love uh space movies. Came on you, came at me. Came at you, came at me. I dodged it. No. No, but like that. They were like, they were like, oh, you like space movies, but you've never seen Star Wars or dude? Why are you laughing still? No, but okay.

SPEAKER_01 44:40

That reminds me of that old Dave Chappelle stand up where he was like that. He's beat his the homies who just beat his dick on the train. He's like, he came, he came with that does that shit.

SPEAKER_02 44:56

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 44:57

Oh my god. Supposedly Dave Chappelle was coming to bed. You would ug. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 45:03

Alright, it's like somebody got uh upset at me because I haven't seen Star Wars and I love I love space movies. I was talking about Project Hail Mary. I was talking about like you know, Interstellar, bunch of shit. And they're like, you don't know shit about space movies, you haven't seen Star Wars, you haven't seen Dune. I was like, those aren't movies about space, those are movies that just happen to be in space, you know? Yeah, like it's not about that. That's like making a movie here, and every movie's like an Earth movie. Like, you get what I'm saying? Does that make sense? I know it's going far off, but it's like not every movie's a movie about Earth, they're just on Earth. Like, that's it. Star Wars has nothing to do with like space, like there's nothing to do with discovering space, and there's aliens, and this planet is this, and we don't know what's happening. That shit's cool. Discovering space. There's a war, and it just happens to be in space, you know? That's it.

SPEAKER_03 45:56

Yeah, that's it.

SPEAKER_02 45:56

There's a lot of space movies.

SPEAKER_03 45:58

After life, after life was a was a fire ass space, like a series, I guess.

SPEAKER_02 46:05

Oh, it's a series, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 46:06

But there's there's only two seasons of it. It got canceled after the second season, but that shit was so crazy, bro. And it's like it's also kind of weird because Netflix? Wait, Ricky Gervais? Yeah, is it that one? Yeah, oh, I didn't see this. I'll check this out. This this is actually because I love sci-fi shit too, bro. You know what I mean? The fact that I'm looking at this now and it has a six percent on Rotten Tomatoes is fucking crazy.

SPEAKER_01 46:35

Loki, bro, Rotten Tomatoes, I'm coming for you. You fucking suck ass, bro.

SPEAKER_02 46:39

That's right. That shit is so crazy. In a box full of vapes, be the be the be the soft pack of newborns like for real. Like, what, like, come on now. Bro, I watched the most recent movie I watched other than um what did I watch today? Clueless. Other than clueless was a movie called Balls Up, because it's also on Amazon.

SPEAKER_03 47:04

And Balls Up?

SPEAKER_02 47:06

It's a it's a movie and it starts with it's a Mark Wahlberg movie, and it starts off with them making a condom that you put on, but it also is a condom for your balls. Do you know why I'm mad right now? Okay.

SPEAKER_01 47:20

No.

SPEAKER_02 47:21

You don't know why I'm mad.

SPEAKER_03 47:24

No.

SPEAKER_02 47:25

Because in the last episodes, I talked about an idea about making a ball cozy for when you go to sleep. Knitting one. And then I did. The whole thing was like people cupping their balls, and it's nice when you go to sleep and you cup your balls, and it's like cozy. So I wanted to make like a ball cozy kind of thing, like a little pouch where you put your balls and like, you know, maybe some strings that aren't like annoying to like, you know, secure them. And this whole movie is about making your balls feel secure while you have a condom on. And I don't know, and I don't know where the microphone is in my room, other than the one in front of my face. Pause. But like they they need, they they need to stop taking my goddamn ideas. Everything I think of is out like within a year, it's just there. Yeah. Oh my god. Like, what's the point of having ideas anymore? What's the point? Bro, we all the share. We we all the share. Who's having a stroke now? Yo, stroke for stroke, stroke for stroke. Wait, pause, pause.

SPEAKER_01 48:37

That's all the mess. That's all what it means. It's stroke. No, look, fall for fall. That was the joke. That was the joke. That was the joke. No, okay. Yo.

SPEAKER_02 48:47

Do we end? I think we need to end, bro. I think we have more than enough. Holy fuck. You did have something to say. Do you want to finish it or not?

SPEAKER_01 48:56

No, that's it. See you guys next time. Bye. Holy shit.