Weed & Advice

Welcome back to Mom Get Off The Wifi. A podcast with two people (Novairz & Bigdaddyfatsax) who became friends over the internet. Finally out of hiatus after years and back with weekly episodes every Thursday!

Edited by Zahra

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Mom, get off the wifi. Get off the wifi, bitch. Mom! Get off the wifi! What the f are you doing?

unknown 0:11

Mom!

SPEAKER_01 0:11

I told you once I were to get it! Get off the f your Wi-Fi!

SPEAKER_08 0:16

Welcome to another episode of Mom Get Off the Wi-Fi Mom Get Off the Wi-Fi!

SPEAKER_04 0:21

Episode 51 51? 51.

SPEAKER_07 0:25

52.

SPEAKER_04 0:26

52? Whichever one it is, it'll say it somewhere. Maybe. Yeah, yeah. It'll say it somewhere, maybe. Okay. It's a good thing if we're losing track. It's a good thing if we're losing track, you know.

SPEAKER_07 0:39

I wanna I wanna ask you. Yeah. Kind of like a serious but not a not a serious question. Do you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 0:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_07 0:47

I'm scared. Do you think do you think we can start beefing with other podcasts?

SPEAKER_04 0:52

Yeah, who you got in mind? Shimmer?

SPEAKER_07 0:54

No. Shout out, Shimmer. Good guy. Love him to be done.

SPEAKER_04 0:57

I would I was gonna say that that's the only other person that's like a friend that I know that started a podcast, which is an amazing podcast.

SPEAKER_07 1:03

I actually took a screenshot of it because and it and you know what?

SPEAKER_04 1:07

If you show me like bad friends right now, like yeah, Joe Rogan, let's beef with him.

SPEAKER_07 1:12

We should probably just chill out, man. And it's not the entire podcast, it's just you know how every podcast has that one motherfucker, especially when there's more than two people who just have like the most outlandish hot takes, bro. Like they're just it like it just sounds so fucking idiotic.

SPEAKER_04 1:27

Like they're like the Charlemagne of like they're just like Yes, they're just trying to amp shit up.

SPEAKER_07 1:32

Yeah, okay. 8793 podcast.

SPEAKER_04 1:35

What's that one?

SPEAKER_07 1:36

They were they were on there and they were debating hottest Atlanta rappers in the like from the 2000s to now.

SPEAKER_04 1:45

Like sexually?

SPEAKER_07 1:47

No.

SPEAKER_04 1:49

Oh, like good, like they're good. Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. Are these girls? I have no idea or what gay they could be whatever. I don't know what they're talking about.

SPEAKER_07 1:59

No, no, no, no. Okay, but they're and one of the dudes on there, and shout out to everybody else who's on that podcast, because they they held it down. But one of the dudes on there was like Ludacris is not top five Atlanta artists ever.

SPEAKER_01 2:14

He has to be that. And I dude, at one point I was like, I was like, you fucking from Atlanta, bro.

SPEAKER_07 2:22

Do you think that Luda is not top five Atlanta artists ever? How old are these people?

SPEAKER_04 2:27

How because I they're are they top five? They look like they're our age. What? Wait, wait, wait, wait, hold on. Who are they comparing them to? Like, who are they like who if it's not Luta?

SPEAKER_07 2:38

Future's on the list, Andre was on the list. Um Andre should be uh number one, actually.

SPEAKER_04 2:43

Oh, yeah, yeah. He should be number one. Okay, never mind.

SPEAKER_07 2:47

I'm getting like angry and shit. Okay, no, okay. Not not debating that, but it was one of those like, and I want to say he at a certain point he kind of like backs backtracked a little bit, but it was still one of those things that where he had like he had future over ludicrous.

SPEAKER_04 3:03

And don't bro, I love yeah, dude, hell yeah, toxic shit. I love that.

SPEAKER_07 3:07

I'm not gonna sit here and say when it comes to straight rapping, bro, Ludacris he to this day, he killed a Drake beat better than Drake did.

SPEAKER_04 3:18

Wait, which one is that? Have I not heard this?

SPEAKER_07 3:20

Um, Janice? Was it Janice? It was it was off his new album.

SPEAKER_04 3:24

I'd have to hear it.

SPEAKER_07 3:25

Bro, he fucking went crazy on it.

SPEAKER_04 3:27

But like, regardless of that, even if we're talking new or not, like if you put everything together, Luda was like up there for a long time, too, you know? A long time. Everybody was listening to him. Like, even Drake talked about Drake was like, remember that one song when he was in his crybaby face? Uh what was it? Was it was it take care? I don't know, where he was just like, and that though my own song is she like, can we listen to some ludicrous? Yeah, he says some shit. He literally dude, come on, how is Drake gonna say that and him not be like, Oh, yeah, that's that's him.

SPEAKER_07 3:59

As I'm watching this video, I'm like, I tried to sit back and be like, you know what? Let him get whatever he has to say out, right? And it got to the point where the the rest of the crew on the podcast wouldn't even let him say what the fuck he had to say because they were just like blown away by blown away by the fact that this dude was like just saying the stupidest shit at the moment.

SPEAKER_04 4:21

Yeah, okay, cool. I thought it was like a a collective decision. They're like, Yeah, fuck Ludo.

SPEAKER_07 4:25

No, no, it was this one dude, and he but he stood his ground, so I like I guess I have to give him props for that, but I mean, yeah, still, bro. It's just I could not sit here and think about it.

SPEAKER_04 4:35

You gotta give props to somebody being a dumbass and being so confident in being a dumbass. Like, you know, when you don't you meet dumbass people, but they're like so sure of themselves, like at one point you gotta just not be mad or upset, be like, you know what? Okay, like you know, like do you do whatever you're doing, you're doing great. You're doing great.

SPEAKER_07 4:55

Uh of all things you could pick to be a dumbass is the top of your list.

SPEAKER_04 4:59

You're really good at doing that. You know, I always say, whatever you do, be really good at it. You're gonna be a coke head, be a good one. You know? Yeah, you're gonna be a dumbass, be a good one. Okay, we're picking this podcast to go to war with.

SPEAKER_07 5:12

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 5:12

Are they are they on our level?

SPEAKER_07 5:14

Are they on our level? Oh, they're they're probably way bigger than our level.

SPEAKER_04 5:18

Let's punch it. We're punching high. We're punching high.

SPEAKER_07 5:20

By the way, future just recently dropped an album. It's fucking hilarious. I don't know if that's one of the things that like he did for that. I I like the album. Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying it's funny, like haha, it's some shit I would laugh at. Yeah, but like some of the hooks and some of the bars are just they are fucking hilarious, bro. Because it's like, how can you be this toxic, bro? You know what I mean? Oh, it's like that. Oh hell yeah. Yeah, so I fucking I love that shit, dog. There's like there's a few bars, and then apparently some of it is leftover verse from King Is Dead with Kendrick.

SPEAKER_04 5:56

Okay.

SPEAKER_07 5:56

So it's like Kendrick was fucking with it, but he was like, dude, that's too long. We gotta cut that shit. So he ended up putting it on his own album. So it's like, all right, cool. You know what I mean? Like it was it was shit that was hot, but just at the time couldn't fit it on the song. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 6:10

I've been using big words lately. That's a big word for Alma.

SPEAKER_07 6:16

You know, bring old TikTok back, bro. I don't I don't know why that made me like remember old TikTok, but bring old TikTok back, bro. I'm tired of the shit that's on TikTok now.

SPEAKER_04 6:26

Dude, I love the shit that's on TikTok. Are you kidding me? It's been great. Right now, it's at his primer. Yeah, there's some guy that's talking making a time machine. He has tech decks and like goop, and he's like, Oh yeah, the traction in this isn't variable around the two times three. I concur. And like he's just yeah, like literally, he's like play-doh or like some type of like slime. And it says like hashtag time machine in the back, and he's just doing and he's been around, he's been doing this for a long time. And he's just on my feet at all times, and it's this guy. I don't know if he's serious about he thinks he's gonna make a time machine, or maybe I'm the one who's stupid and he's on the right path, and he's gonna make this time machine. I'm just like, what is this guy? And the comment section is like, Oh, I concur. The traction is a little too heavy for that one. They're also like making fun of this guy. It's just a bunch of engineers on TikTok, bro. See, but that's the TikToks I like. I like the dumb shit. The dumb shit that's just like there's no punchline. It's just it's just some shit, it's just some shit, bro. Like, I love that shit. That shit, dude. That shit is great.

SPEAKER_07 7:28

I'm I'm not gonna say I disagree with that. There are some times where I'm kind of just like, how the fuck does bro like this shit? Cause like sometimes, yeah, because sometimes like we get we get along with like the base point of comedy, you know what I mean? We grew up on the Dave Chappelle for what it's worth, you know, dude jacking off the train, jacking off on the train and like having to dodge the fucking or like getting carrots getting shoved up your ass. You're like, fuck carrots, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, yeah. Like people think about shit like that, and it's like, all right, cool. You know what I mean? Old school Dave Chappelle shit. And then somewhere along the line, you went left and I went right. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 8:05

It's like a dry comedy. Like, you know, like what do they call that? Dry comedy, maybe British, they're all dry. So it's like that. No, I think it came from like, I mean, I don't think, right? The instant all this shit like dry, like there's no laugh tracks, there's no nothing, it's just like it is what it is, and it's like, you know, I think that's just so fucking funny. You know, I get mad when I hear laugh tracks. Don't tell me when they laugh. I get so upset. I get so fucking upset with that. And what's crazy, and it's crazy as like a YouTuber, like when people do you like the vlogs and shit, not even the shit that I do, but when people do vlogs, all the laughs they do, like they say you're supposed to laugh, even if you don't find something funny. What the fuck was that?

SPEAKER_07 8:46

You got a nap problem. Nat trying to fucking throw fuck you right now, bro.

SPEAKER_04 8:50

Non-consensual.

SPEAKER_07 8:51

And you know what blows my mind is you like you smoke in your room.

SPEAKER_04 8:55

Yeah, I guess they're getting secondhand smoke. How they're not dying.

SPEAKER_07 8:58

I don't know how and like they say flies don't fuck with fluck with fluck fluck with what the fuck flies don't fuck with smoke.

SPEAKER_01 9:05

He's drunk, bro.

SPEAKER_04 9:07

He's drunk, yeah. They're not supposed to. When I was in Pakistan, bro, it was there, you know, you get bit up so much by mosquitoes and shit, it was insane. It felt like I was going through torture. Like, that's how many. But then they had this like uh little smoke thing, they call it coila. Call that. I'm not I'm sure they didn't use like a Mexican accent. I don't know. I use a Mexican accent saying it. But yeah, they had one of those, and then it would just be like this little spiral thing that you just burn and you'd burn it overnight, and it just lasts, and it just get the mosquitoes like out the fucking way. And it's just smoke, basically. Maybe it's just smell, maybe the smell needs to be something else. Maybe they like to smell it.

SPEAKER_07 9:50

What is the last memory you have of going to Pakistan?

SPEAKER_04 9:53

Shitting myself. Uh and Lion King. And Lion King. I got I drank the water there, so I got so sick. So I was just sitting, dribbling, just shit dribbling down my leg. Like I was delusional. The room was spinning. Yeah, there's like diarrhea shit just dribbling down my leg. It was crazy, and I had a hole to shit in. Not even a toilet. So I had to play a fucking game of make it in the hole. The fuck is this? Bags. Well, what a challenge. It's like a fucking challenge to be sick, though. Like over there. You can't just be regular sick. And it's fucking why while I'm sitting in this fucking hole, don't worry, there's people attacking you too. There's big ass flying cockroaches coming out this hole trying to go up your asshole. So you're trying to maneuver. It's like it's like you have a little like pong thing, you know, like you're not hitting pong, like you go back and forth. I'm doing that with my asshole. And it's just like I'm trying to avoid all these things trying to hit me. It's crazy, bro. That's my biggest memory. Also, Lion King on PC in the game. That one. First time I played it was there.

SPEAKER_07 10:59

So you go to Pakistan. How long from the moment you landed a week. You you taking that first drink of water and you getting sick.

SPEAKER_04 11:13

A week. I was there for a couple months.

SPEAKER_07 11:14

Bro, and how long were you sick?

SPEAKER_04 11:17

Oh, like a month. I was sick for a week. You were sick the entire time after that, bro? Felt like it. Felt like it. I might have drank the water again halfway through the month. I don't know. Because I don't know what's clean and what's not, bro. That is the water that I drank at the wedding. Like, it wasn't even like, you know what I mean? At the wedding, it was the water that I drank there. But like at the house, they'd boil the water, they do all this shit, you know? But at the wedding, wait, so at the wedding?

SPEAKER_07 11:45

Are they pulling out the AKs and just shooting off in the air?

SPEAKER_04 11:47

Nah, that's like Saudi Arabia. That's not us.

SPEAKER_07 11:50

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_04 11:50

My bad.

SPEAKER_07 11:51

I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_04 11:55

But like if I wasn't sick, there's like it was it was kind of cool. They had like like trees with fruits on them. Like, you know, if I wasn't if I wasn't shitting all the time and like could actually enjoy it a little more. Because like when I stopped doing that, there was like little things about it that I fucking loved. I thought it was so cool. You know? Like when it would rain, bro, and it's a big deal if it rains there, you know? It'd rain, and there's a peanut guy, you know? It's a guy, I don't know, but they really like it. And I understood. I understood when I was there. I was like, oh, because they told me about the peanut guy. I'm like, okay, a peanut guy, and with little just peanuts, like nothing crazy, just peanuts. And it like rained, and after he was like, peanut, peanut, you know, like he was like uh walking around like the villages that we were at, and he's just peanuts, and it was nice, it was real nice. The best so he would only come out when it would rain? No, that's the only time I saw him. I'm sure he comes out.

SPEAKER_05 12:50

Oh I'm sure he's around for other occasions also, but he magically appears like a leprechaun, bro.

SPEAKER_04 13:00

The magical peanut guy. I say a lot of bad things on here that my family shouldn't watch, and they recently found this podcast. So, since we're talking about this, I want to say something that will also villainize them. So, so if they tell other people to watch it, people will also know what they've done. So, the first time I ever got high, you know. Well, okay, okay. The first time I ever tried to get high, I ate the weed. I ate the buds. I obviously didn't get high.

SPEAKER_08 13:31

Oh my god, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 13:34

Baby, the driest shit ever. Okay, but when I but when I first got high, you know, you know half baked, but when I first got high, oh we felt it. Like, you know what I mean? Dude, but uh yeah, I felt it. And you know what's crazier? Put out you guys cannot make me look bad because it was on Eid, a religious holiday.

SPEAKER_01 13:55

You know? No, it was a great time.

SPEAKER_04 13:57

I mean, no, actually, I was out of I fucking zooted out my fucking mind. But uh like it was Eid. Um, they had all the parents go hang out somewhere else, and then all like the younger kids hang out at this house, and like I was like young, but like you know, old enough to oh, we can hang out with the older cousins, right? You know, without your parents being like, uh, you know. So I went there uh after a little bit when I got there, like you know, this rock band happening, like you know, I'm not this is people playing games and shit. And then I go outside, and this is the front lawn, they live off of a busy street, and they're in Chicago, like they're in Chicago. So they'll have a b of a biggie, a big street, a biggie street, a big street, and then uh they put on they put down this Homer, like Simpsons, Homer. It's a Homer head, and it has four pipes going out, right? Out of Homer's head, and then you know, on top is this, but like it's it's this big bong, it's a shared bong. That's what it is. I don't know what the word is for it, but it's a bong that you smoke with four people, right? And okay, um, I'm there, and these were my older cousins, you know, a lot of them that act really goody two shoes now. So, you know, chill on me, because if I hear you talking about what I do over here, I'm gonna start dropping names.

SPEAKER_08 15:11

Okay, I just made the Knicks eat the most awkward situation ever.

SPEAKER_04 15:16

But it was but it was great, it was great, and then but okay, I'll tell you even more. So we smoke, right? And I don't know what the fuck, like I took two hits after the first one. I shouldn't have, but they're like, you know, you got this, you got this. You got they still they used to call me Tupac, they used to call my dad Biggie. Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, Tupac, and they would call him Suge Knight. They call him Suge Knight. Okay, like that, and they're like, No, you're they'll be like, You're Tupac. That's how they gas me up because I love Tupac. And they gas me up like they're like, and I'm a kid, like you're Tupac, you can't handle this. Come on, come on, they can't see you, hit them up. And like, I'm like, okay. I'm like, okay, so I go, I take another hit, and I am fucking gone. Like, I have to tell my right leg to move forward, and then I have to tell my brain for my left leg to move forward. Like, I'm that fucked up. And uh I sat on the couch upstairs and they had Xbox Connect, like when it first came out, right? And that that that's like a camera, like on your Xbox, like uh Xbox 360. So it's like uh I think it's that one.

SPEAKER_07 16:12

But who do who the fuck did you just explain that to?

SPEAKER_04 16:14

Like the fucking explain to myself 19-year-old audience. Yeah, there you go. There you go. Look, look, yeah, there's younger people that listen to us. That's what it is. Fuck up, bro. Yeah, but I was sitting there and they thought it'd be so funny. Like, I'm on the couch, like barely being a human. I'm just like, oh, like I'm just I'm focusing on to exhale and inhale, like you know, that's what that's what I'm focusing on. And they recorded me from the Xbox Connect of my first time being high, and I didn't know it was on or being recorded. So I'm gonna say, I love them the dead. You know, they're cool. There's a couple a couple of cousins over there, I don't, I don't, or not, or family friends, I don't care about, which is fine. But yeah, they did. I'm just putting that I the only reason I'm saying this right now is because I'm hearing something and be like, oh Novere's a bad kid because you guys are too. Stop fucking hiding, okay? I'm so sick of this shit.

SPEAKER_07 17:08

So if they hear this you would hear it.

SPEAKER_04 17:12

No, no, no. Come on, Kosov, Carol. That's it. That's it. I'm not I'm not saying shit. I'm just saying, you know, I have to put that out there. I just have to put that out there. That's it. That's it.

SPEAKER_07 17:24

I'll never, bro, I'll never forget.

SPEAKER_04 17:26

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 17:27

My my my brother, Oscar Mike, for those of y'all who don't know, it's my older brother, right? If we put if you stick us side by side, it it's damn near hard to tell that we're not just twins, right? He's he is five years older than me, you know. Shout out uh being an older brother, but um he hits me up and he's like, Hey, you want to go to this Mudvane show? Fuck yes. I'm not gonna fucking turn down Mud Vane, you know what I mean? And actually, you know what? No, we didn't get caught on the Mudvain show. Not saying we did anything on the Mudvain show. We got caught on the Powerman 5000 show.

SPEAKER_04 18:06

Okay, so caught doing what?

SPEAKER_07 18:08

I'm bad, my bad, my bad, my bad, my bad, my bad.

SPEAKER_04 18:11

Damn, bro. You ain't even let me put the tip in. I'm getting excited. Getting excited.

SPEAKER_07 18:16

Okay, yeah. So we he hits me up. You want to go to the Paramount 5000 show? Fuck yes. I had a great time at the Mudvane show. Obviously, gonna have a great time at the Paramount 5000 show, right? Yeah, Powerman 5000 is playing in this bum fuck ass town in Texas, right? Jada Peekett Smith, when she was in a band, opened up for them, right? Okay, went to go see this show. I got fucked up all weekend. I'm like a freshman, bro.

SPEAKER_04 18:50

Um how many ounces did you guys have back then?

SPEAKER_07 18:53

Then I I don't, I'm not gonna lie, bro. Give me half a gram. Like, I was like, that's the beginning. No, no, no. I remember my principal, because I was like, it was in the it was in the area to show. Like, I was, you know what I mean? Like, whatever. Like it, I I can't help that it got in my system. I remember the principal looking at me and being like, You can't get this much in your system by it just being in the building.

SPEAKER_03 19:18

And I was like, Wait, your principal was there?

SPEAKER_07 19:20

No, no, no. So when I got caught on my drug test, it shows like the levels. Okay, yeah, yeah. It shows the levels that were in your system. And he was like, You can't get caught with like there's no way this amount gets just.

SPEAKER_09 19:32

Oh, Chi Chin Chong over here.

SPEAKER_07 19:35

Bro, I'll never it was like I remember having this conversation, right? And it was like, Holy crap, bro, I'm in fucking trouble. I remember sitting in the office trying to like not get caught up, right? And he's like, you know, you're gonna have to go through this, you're gonna have to do this if you want to stay on the football team, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, right? Bro, he calls my dad and he's like, Yo, your son got caught on his drug test, this, that, and the third. And I'll never forget just hearing that, like, that tone in my dad's voice, and it was like, bro, I knew when I got home, I was fucking, bro.

SPEAKER_08 20:21

I was done for you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_04 20:24

Also, he called him on the phone and it was like speaker, so you can hear it at school. Yes, bro. Yes, that is the worst.

SPEAKER_07 20:32

I get home and I get the word, like, it's just pure disappointment, pure uh, you know what I mean? It was just like, fuck, I let him down, all this shit, bro. And I'll tell you right now, dude, I would not trade that moment for anything. I'm not saying do drugs. I'm not saying do drugs. I'm saying I'm saying trade those moments for anything in the world, bro.

SPEAKER_04 20:53

I'm saying do the good ones responsibly, the legal ones. Hell yeah. You know, like there you go.

SPEAKER_07 20:58

We could say legal now, and not just the ones that are legal in some places, but the don't don't what are you saying?

SPEAKER_04 21:04

What are you saying? What are you saying right now?

SPEAKER_07 21:06

Don't drink and do podcast, kids.

SPEAKER_04 21:08

No, I think we should always, but I think that's the only way podcast should be done now, to be honest. It's the best.

SPEAKER_07 21:14

See, you see what y'all fucking did? We had one sober episode, yeah, and y'all were like, I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_03 21:20

I didn't like it, but literally gods in this motherfucker's head, bro.

SPEAKER_04 21:25

Yeah, literally, you'll never see me not drunk. Literally, you did this to me. Okay, okay. If I'm on camera, I'm gonna be drunk. No, I'm kidding, that's a joke. But Jennifer Gardner, bro, she is so pretty.

SPEAKER_07 21:42

So you like my dimples, bro?

SPEAKER_04 21:44

No, yours don't hit, bro. Wait, did you have dimples? It's it's always hard to tell you.

SPEAKER_07 21:49

I do I got fur right there. I do, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:52

But they're yeah, yeah, but yeah, I got fur. I do have dimples.

SPEAKER_07 21:56

You know what, you know what I was told one time? All right, bro, relax.

SPEAKER_08 22:00

Trying to make my dimples come out. You've been fucking through the beard for the last six hours, bro.

SPEAKER_04 22:08

Can you see my dimples? No, no, no, no, no. You're not gonna be able to see them. It's fine, it's fine. They're not, they're not that crazy, you know, but they're there.

SPEAKER_07 22:18

Somebody told me some shit, and I looked it up and I was like, oh shit, that's true.

SPEAKER_04 22:23

What?

SPEAKER_07 22:24

Dimples are considered a of the face. Okay, so I'll resay it. Dimples are considered a deformity of the face and not an actual, like what we consider of it as like a oh, he's got dimples. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 22:40

Similar to like I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_07 22:46

I'm so sorry. Can we talk about like the shit that Suge Knight got away with, right? Because we're not talking, we're not talking about the shit that like he got sent to jail for. This motherfucker hung shit had hung vanilla ice out of window by his ankles, bro.

SPEAKER_04 23:05

Like that is like you know, but damn, was he a funny motherfucker? Like, if you're on like not on that side of the story, that's kind of hilarious. I I mean it's funny. It's fucked up. It's fucked up, it's fucked up.

SPEAKER_07 23:18

It is, yeah, you know, he's not a good person. It's funny. You know what I mean? Outside of looking in, it's always funny, but like, bro, the shit that people look, man, look, man. Everybody likes to say, everybody likes to say, right? I would never let that fucking happen to me. I wouldn't nah. I'm telling you right now, I probably would not be here today if Suge Knight tried to do some shit like that, bro.

SPEAKER_04 23:44

Like, 100%, 100%. And you know that shit in like in uh you know Strateg, right? The movie? Uh the shit they made Snoop Dogg, like, oh yeah, what are you gonna do about it? To like Suge Knight? That shit did not fucking happen, bro. I am so sorry. That was like, you know, when they were making that movie, Suge Knight wasn't allowed in the premises, and it was it was Dr. Dre and Snoop Dogg and stuff. That I don't think that that part happened. I think that little part was like just to make him look cool for that moment. Santa Lake Stanfield, though, he played a great Snoop Dogg. He's amazing. Anything he does, literally anything he does. You know how he got, you know how he got into acting? Oh he responded to it, he never did acting on his shit before. He just responded to an ad, like in a magazine, a newspaper, like or a Facebook ad. Like he just responded to an ad and got a role. And then ever since then, he just kept getting roles. He just didn't know, bro.

SPEAKER_05 24:37

What kind of lottery?

SPEAKER_04 24:39

What kind of life lottery did you hit? Like, there's people that go to Second City in Chicago, and you're like, they take their time and acting and improv and all this shit. Like Second City is a big thing, and I get a piece. And he's like, Oh, I just responded to an ad. Like, I was just over here smoking my 28 grams in the weekend, it wasn't enough. But I just responded to this ad and then suddenly I just became a huge fucking actor. Now I'm playing Snoop Dogg. What are you saying, bro?

SPEAKER_07 25:04

Like, that's amazing. By the way, 28 grams isn't a lot, especially for 28 grams, bro.

SPEAKER_04 25:10

28 grams for three days should be enough. It shouldn't be okay. It shouldn't be you shouldn't last.

SPEAKER_03 25:19

Exactly. Yeah, but that's different. That's so different. That's so different. Bleep that, bro. Bullet that that's my pass. I don't do that anymore. No, that's so different, bro. That's so different. I'm saying 28 grams per weekend shouldn't have you tripping.

SPEAKER_04 25:35

It shouldn't have you be like, oh no, what are we gonna do? Hey, scoops! What are we gonna do? Like, it shouldn't have you like doing this whole thing. It should be like, all right, we're we're okay. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_07 25:45

Zara, don't edit that shit out. I'm calling him out. Fuck him.

SPEAKER_04 25:51

You can keep it in there. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. No, no, I don't give a shit. Bleed it out, bleep it out, not eat it out.

SPEAKER_01 25:57

Yo, yo.

SPEAKER_05 26:00

What are you telling the editor to do?

SPEAKER_07 26:04

I'm sorry, I meant bleep it out. I meant bleep it out. Zara, don't do that. Don't bleep it out.

SPEAKER_05 26:09

Don't get anything out, please. Please, you're a good kid.

SPEAKER_04 26:15

Don't do none of that.

SPEAKER_08 26:17

Bleep it out. Bleep it out. Bleep it out.

SPEAKER_04 26:19

Welcome to the advice segment. This, what we're playing now, it's not gonna be us reading it. This is a reenactment of the people who submitted these advices, okay? And it's um it's not it's not the person. That's all that's all I'm gonna make sure. So people know that this I'm not like you know, doxing people. It's not the same dude who has these different problems. Yeah, yeah, it's all the same guy that just has this. And this one is by Slimx Reaper Keno. I'll add his YouTube and his Twitch and everything in the description. That is who is doing this reenactment. All right, let's go. Question our question or advice question one.

SPEAKER_00 27:00

Hi guys, how do I quit vaping when I'm so committed? That's not him. That is not him.

SPEAKER_06 27:07

Guys, his voice don't like this.

SPEAKER_05 27:13

There's no way that's him. There's no way that's him. His voice, how does it even get that high?

SPEAKER_01 27:20

I'm so so I told you. I told you he was gonna fuck with us. Oh my god! Oh my god!

SPEAKER_05 27:30

How did he even do that? Holy shit.

SPEAKER_04 27:34

Oh, okay, okay. Guys, by the way, we are taking your advice seriously, okay? Um what the fuck? How did he do that? Okay, okay, okay, you ready? I'm starting it over. Let's keep a straight face and listen. We're here for advice. We're the advice givers.

SPEAKER_00 27:56

Hi guys, how do I quit vaping when I'm so committed that when I get my wisdom teeth removed, I just hit it through my nose. Like, I would not put this shit down. One time I tried to quit and ended up driving to my friend's house to hit the vape.

SPEAKER_04 28:20

Um, yeah.

SPEAKER_07 28:22

This is um I I also have some Nah, there's no way they're fucking with us because of the the Newport vape episode. There's no way this is real, bro.

SPEAKER_04 28:34

Like if you have a problem putting hitting a vape up your nose, alright, shut up. Like, why? Why? But if you do have a vape problem, I can't give you any advice because I also have a similar issue. Um, so I don't have the answer to it.

SPEAKER_07 28:53

Zins, bro. Fuck it, step up to Zins, be a grown man or a woman.

SPEAKER_04 28:58

I I heard Zins from a friend. She did three milligrams, smoked just as much as me at one point. You know, did three milligrams zings, and other than toothpicks or the gum or whatever, that made her literally not smoke at all. Because it's cutting out the habit of pause, but putting something in your mouth. So there's that. I'm not gonna take this advice thing seriously, right? There's no way they were real about that. But vaping up my nose, like it's not, but like you're still putting things in your mouth if you're if you're doing zins.

SPEAKER_07 29:33

Yeah, but it's not it's not the it's not the sucking, like it's not, it's not hand, it's not hand to mouth.

SPEAKER_04 29:39

It's just yeah, you're just you're just changing something, and then maybe what? Switch to gum, regular ass gum, who knows? If it's that hard to where you're driving other places to pause. I can't believe he sounded like that. Okay. Do you have more advice for that one? I I'm still thinking whether because this is the first time we're hearing hearing this and hearing this reenactment. So oh my god. Okay.

SPEAKER_05 30:08

Oh shit.

SPEAKER_08 30:09

Hold on, I'm not ready for the next so scary.

SPEAKER_05 30:12

Okay.

SPEAKER_08 30:13

Hold on, hold on.

SPEAKER_04 30:14

Looks like we have three questions. We have three questions. This is the second one. Why does this feel like a challenge? Try not to laugh challenge. But it's not because any of the no, it's that has nothing to do with your guys' advice, okay? I we are not laughing at you and what you're asking, okay? Okay.

SPEAKER_02 30:34

Question two quarter brook, half a brook, whole brute. I hope y'all finish that long.

SPEAKER_06 30:43

Hey, hey, hey, yeah. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Okay. Okay, okay, okay, let's go on.

SPEAKER_02 30:55

Quarter brook, half a brute, whole brute. I hope y'all finish that long.

SPEAKER_05 31:03

What is this screen? What is this voice? Okay, okay, okay, one more time, one more time, one more time. Okay, let's try one more time. We have to, yeah, woo-saw, whatever, whatever, you know.

SPEAKER_04 31:16

We're good at improving. We just have to say it to make us believe that actors, straight face.

SPEAKER_02 31:24

Quarterbrook, half a brook, whole brook. I hope y'all finish that line. If not, I'm disappointed. But my question is if a bad thing offered to toss your solid, but she's gonna record the tossing, are you going through it, brother? Or no?

SPEAKER_05 31:46

One more time, one more time, let's not edit.

SPEAKER_06 31:49

I ain't gonna throw it with it. What the fuck is that voice?

SPEAKER_02 31:52

Quarter brook, half a brook, whole brook. I hope y'all finish that line. If not, I'm disappointed. But my question is if a bad thing offered to toss your salad, but she's gonna record the tossing, are you going through it with it? Or no? Oh no.

SPEAKER_07 32:16

I swear to god.

SPEAKER_06 32:20

Oh no. Like fucking.

SPEAKER_04 32:29

Okay, I'm not I'm not I uh I don't want my salad to get tossed, regardless if it's recorded or not. I'm not gonna lie. Um that's not yeah, it's not for me. I don't even know if that was advice. I think that was a question.

SPEAKER_08 32:41

Uh but if yeah, if y'all want to ask us questions too, then cool. I guess so.

SPEAKER_04 32:49

But if that was advice, if that's something you're going through, if you don't mind, do what you do. Be a freak. There's nothing wrong with being a freak. If that's me personally, not for me. Not for me. But if you want to get your ass eight, get your ass eight, you know?

SPEAKER_07 33:04

No, and uh, especially like right, coming from uh Novaire, who like What are you about to say? Obviously he's like pioneered clean booty holes. You know what I mean? Like if he's if he's not out here bidet's for life. Trying to get trying to get his ass ate and recorded at the same time. If it's not being recorded, are you doing it?

SPEAKER_04 33:27

Just no. Imagine me with my ankles at my fucking head, bro, getting my ass ate, bro. I that's not something I want to fucking do.

SPEAKER_07 33:35

What if they like putting fucking strawberry stuff on the hole?

SPEAKER_04 33:39

I don't see this, I don't see the stimulation in that where I'd be like, oh yeah, this is what I want. Why? For me, it just seems very unnecessary. I don't know, but like if you guys like that, then do it. I guess, you know, like if that's what you guys want. I'm not king shaming here. I'm not king shaming.

SPEAKER_07 33:59

No, no, no, no, never that, right? Everybody's got their own kinks. Do what makes you happy, but that's just yeah.

SPEAKER_04 34:07

Important part, you know, if maybe getting your ass aid isn't the issue, if this is a problem that you're going through, or like an this what you need advice on, it's the recording part. I think you should be true to yourself. Who cares if people see? You know, and if you're gonna do anything in the business point of my in my brain, monetize it. Um, if that's you know, is it for OnlyFans? Is she doing it for her OnlyFans? Are you getting a cut? You know, because this is a big ask for, you know. At least, at least I mean maybe a flat payment, like you know, a flat price of oh, this is gonna be OnlyFans, because why is she recording it in the first place?

SPEAKER_07 34:44

Don't do flat payment, always take your royalties.

SPEAKER_04 34:46

That is true, but like you know, if she's up there, you know, networking is a thing, you know. Maybe maybe this becomes like a regular thing, and your flat payment that you took for this one video could be like, oh, let me put you on contract. You're on a retainer now for your you getting your asset. And you know, it could become a thing. So I'm just saying, don't block your own shots, or don't block the shots that are the shots, the ones that are happening. I don't know how to phrase it right. I feel like I phrased it wrong while I was talking. Just don't block the shots you are given. I guess. I don't know.

SPEAKER_08 35:23

This man has no sports knowledge.

SPEAKER_04 35:27

Make sure you make the touchdowns, even if you're off sides. Okay, you get what I'm saying? Six points for everyone. You get what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_05 35:42

Right? This it all makes sense, I I assume. Next one? Okay, let's go.

SPEAKER_08 35:52

My face hurts so bad. He only has to do one more voice, bro.

SPEAKER_04 35:58

I know that's I am bro. Holy shit. His voice is a good tune. Yeah, alright, guys. If we could get through this, the the last piece of advice for the podcast. Oh my god, Keno, what the hell? Okay. Are you ready?

SPEAKER_09 36:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_10 36:18

All right. Hi guys, I have been very confused as of late. Everyone around me fucking he's drooling on himself.

SPEAKER_03 36:37

I feel like you're wearing a bib.

SPEAKER_04 36:55

Okay, okay, okay, we got this, we got this. We're acting, we're good actors. We can keep straight faces for sure. Fucking hell, okay.

SPEAKER_10 37:05

Hi guys. I have been very confused as of late. Everyone around me has been neglecting me. Honestly, I don't know what I've been doing wrong. I just don't know what people think of me at this point. I just love Thortos. I love everything about Thortos. I love getting a hand.

SPEAKER_08 37:22

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. What the fruit is that? I just love Thortos? Is that check this on this?

SPEAKER_05 37:29

Thortos Run it back, run it back, run it back. What the fuck is happening right now?

SPEAKER_04 37:34

Are y'all trolling us? Okay, anyway, one more time. One more time. Let's listen to it all. Normally, okay, we can't keep repeating this. Normally. Hi guys.

SPEAKER_10 37:45

I have been very confused as of late. Everyone around me has been neglecting me. Honestly, I don't know what I've been doing wrong. I just don't know what people think of me at this point. I just love Tortoise. I love everything about Tortoise. I love getting a hell by them. I love getting hugs by them. Some may call it a beef sandwich. I think I might change my government name to Tortanius because I love them so much. What do you guys think of it? Some feedback will be grateful. Love the pot, by the way. Great content. It makes my bust people hear you both talk about this.

SPEAKER_05 38:22

I didn't even catch the last half, bro. What the hell? It got immediately worse and worse and worse. That got so bad.

SPEAKER_04 38:34

The laugh at the end had to be improv.

SPEAKER_06 38:36

Okay. There's no way they typed out Tortaneous. Yeah, I dude.

SPEAKER_05 38:43

I lost it. Oh god. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 38:47

Then again, I don't I don't know if you're asking for advice. This is just a confession, man.

SPEAKER_05 38:51

Like, I don't know what you want from us. I really don't. Uh okay.

SPEAKER_07 39:02

So first off, love who and what you want. Everybody's got a type, bro. I'm gonna I'm gonna take this as advice. People be laughing at you or judging you because you love thortas, right? Love what you want, do what you want, eat what you want. If it's thortas, then let it be thortas, bro. Like and what are they gonna do in your relationship? What is what does J. Cole say? Who you fuck don't make you come, what you eat don't make me shit. Do what you want, bro.

SPEAKER_04 39:38

True, love yours.

SPEAKER_07 39:38

Or who you want, I guess is what I should say.

SPEAKER_04 39:41

Yeah, Tortavius. I hope you do well. Tortavius, is what he said. Uh uh, yeah. Um this shouldn't be an issue with your friends. If your friends uh don't accept you, you said you felt like neglected or something. I think that's what you said.

SPEAKER_06 40:01

Something like that.

SPEAKER_04 40:02

Yeah, something. You said something for sure. Um yeah, just do what you want to do. Just everybody on all the advice, just don't be stop being ashamed. Okay, because in reality, nobody actually cares what you do. You might think that they do, but in all honesty, nobody actually cares what you do. Nobody's sitting there saying, Oh, what is this? Yeah, you saw that, right? There's a gnat. Yeah, and it was going slow too. Uh but like at the end of the day, nobody gets a lot. At the end of the day, you're gay. No, not that. That was just from a tube thing. I had to say it was like a little vocal stem. Okay, but at the end of the day, nobody cares what you do.

SPEAKER_07 40:46

You like men.

SPEAKER_04 40:47

Yeah, and and if there's our people that care what you do, it seems like they need to get a life. Wait, I said yeah. Oh, wait, no, I don't like men. I didn't even hear what he said. I was just like, let's try to go on with my thought process. I don't like men. Sorry, that was for Czar.

SPEAKER_08 41:00

Please bleep that out.

SPEAKER_04 41:01

What the fuck? Okay. Live your life. Live who you are, and that's all that matters. You'll be way happier for it. Yo. You want to say bye, bro? I can't. What the fuck does happen?

SPEAKER_08 41:18

I don't yo, a special shout out. Thank you for tuning in to another episode.

SPEAKER_07 41:24

Special shout out to our board Kino W voice actor. Obviously, if y'all have something for him to do, please reach out to him. You know he can do it.

SPEAKER_04 41:33

His YouTube and everything will be linked in the description, also. Was not expecting that. That's what I'm gonna say. I just wasn't expecting that. Great, a great voice actor. I'll say that.

SPEAKER_07 41:44

I think I think he really W improv. He went through the whole step. You know, he committed, he committed to the character. For those of you who don't know that shit, he committed to the character.

SPEAKER_04 41:54

I think he really became the character too. Like, you know, I think every single person he read off of, he really like tuned in onto how they were as a person and really replicated that, you know, with what we just heard. Um that's episode, whatever which one it is. Thank you for watching. Mom get off the Wi Fi. Oh yeah.