Escaping Burnout: How to Prioritize Yourself and Find Your Purpose with Charlotte Smalley

Never Been Promoted Podcast with Thomas Helfrich

Charlotte Smalley shares how she transformed her life through mindset shifts and manifestation. From overcoming fibromyalgia to creating a life of joy and success, Charlotte now helps others do the same by teaching them how to harness their thoughts, emotions, and daily habits to manifest the life they truly desire.

About Charlotte Smalley:

Charlotte Smalley is a life coach and mindset expert specializing in manifestation and positive thinking. After years in nursing, she pivoted to helping others take control of their thoughts, emotions, and energy to create powerful transformations. Through her coaching, content, and book Manifest Your Ideal Body Size, Charlotte inspires people to embrace gratitude, rewire their mindset, and manifest their best lives.

In this episode, Thomas and Charlotte discuss:

• How Your Thoughts Shape Your Reality

Charlotte explains how the way we think and feel directly influences our outcomes in life, and how shifting to a positive mindset can create real change.

• The Power of Morning and Nighttime Affirmations

She breaks down why your thoughts are most powerful in the morning and before bed, and how using affirmations at these times can rewire your subconscious mind.

• Healing Through Mindset and Energy Alignment

Charlotte shares how she overcame fibromyalgia by shifting her thoughts, reducing stress, and embracing a joyful, high-vibration lifestyle.

Key Takeaways:

• Gratitude is the Foundation of Manifestation

Starting your day with appreciation—even for the smallest things—creates a mindset that attracts more positivity and success.

• What You Focus on Expands

If you constantly dwell on what’s wrong, you’ll see more problems. But when you train your mind to look for good, you start attracting more of it.

• You Can Reprogram Your Mind for Success

By using affirmations, visualization, and intentional gratitude, you can shift your reality and create a life that aligns with your desires.

“Your thoughts and emotions are the blueprint for your future. Change them, and you change your life.” — Charlotte Smalley

CONNECT WITH CHARLOTTE SMALLEY:

Website: https://www.linkedin.com/in/charlotte-smalley-2b4714177
Instagram: @charlottelifecoach
YouTube: @charlottesmalley3578
Book: Manifest Your Ideal Body Size (Available on Amazon)

CONNECT WITH THOMAS:

X (Twitter): https://x.com/CutTheTieX

Facebook: http://facebook.com/groups/CutTheTie

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cutthetiecommunity/

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@cutthetie

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@cutthetie

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/thomashelfrich/ 

CutTheTie.com

Chapters

• 0:00 Introduction and Welcome
• 1:05 Cut the Tie to Limiting Beliefs
• 2:40 Guest Introduction: Charlotte Smalley
• 4:15 What is Manifestation?
• 10:18 The Power of Positive Thinking
• 15:30 Practical Steps to Change Mindset
• 22:05 Personal Stories of Transformation
• 30:20 The Importance of Gratitude and Affirmations
• 35:45 Conclusion and Call to Action

Transcript

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Welcome to the Never Been Promoted podcast. I'm your host Thomas Helfrich. We are on a mission to help you cut the tie to everything holding you back so you can unleash your entrepreneur. We release five shows weekly, all types of guests and they are really powerful, impactful things to help you move forward. So hit that follow button. That's my only ask. The follow button on your favorite podcast player, Apple, Spotify, crush that follow button. Thank you so much for listening and enjoy Never Been Promoted. Welcome to Never Been Promoted. Hi. I'm your host, Thomas Helfrich. I'm just just doing a little light reading, porn for women. I said it. Let me read from this. Honey, why don't I get the minivan so you could drive something fun? Oh, look at that. In a playoffs are today. You know, I think we should go to Marshall's. I'm reading that because it's just in front of me. And I try to tell people usually by December, I am very cheeky. I've lost all professionalism. It's January of twenty twenty five and I'm gonna start the year with no professionalism. I am just gonna be ridiculous this year, and the reason is because I'm kind of delicious. I'm I could be fun at times. You may find it annoying. It doesn't matter because our mission is to help people get better at entrepreneurship. And if you can't have fun doing this, what's the point? What's the point? So we're gonna help you cut ties to shit holding you back. We're gonna help you cut ties to all the excuses and the fear cycle and all the crap that's in your way. And our guest today, by the way, is very cool. Charlotte Smalley. She has, like, a, like an actress name, Charlotte Smalley, starring in manifestation of your thoughts. She actually helps people kind of transform her life. She transformed her life, through, honestly, just better thinking, better transformation of what she is gonna be positive of what you believe in and and helps others do this now. And I and I think, I do think I know if your mindset is something of, you know, I get to do something versus I have to do something if if you decide that you're gonna be positive versus negative, these things matter. They matter in how you live, they don't know how you feel, and it's gonna be a difference honestly if you're gonna be successful or not as an entrepreneur because you're gonna have to weather some shit. You're gonna have to get through, parts that are gonna be difficult, and as long as you don't quit, you don't lose. So let's meet our guest. Oh, by the way, I I probably should do a shameless plug. I've been told that's what you'd you're supposed to do. We We have a thing starting this year called cutthetie. So cutthetie.com, you go there, and you can become, a member of the community of hell and where we go to help each other. So, you know, this is a there's a free community and you can join a mastermind, and the guest of the show, if they don't suck, Charlotte's not gonna suck. She's a little nervous today. I'm calling around on it now. It's okay. They get invited in anyway. So anyway, I'll just bring our guest up. Charlotte oh, go to go to cuttodie.com. Charlotte, you're coming to the stage. How are you? Alright. Hi, Thomas. How are you? I'm good. Why why are you nervous? You said you were nervous. I was like, why you're on Facebook, like, 7,000 times a day live.
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Yeah. I don't know. You should be nervous. I I really I don't I don't think I buy you. I'm not nervous. It's it's all in the mind anyway, and I'm happy. I'm happy to share the good news. Look at you. You oh, now see, I've been on YouTube long enough. Where's my Oh, wait. Wait. Wait. I've I've had this for almost nine months and not opened it yet. It's the gold one.
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Oh, wow. I still haven't opened it. Well, see, that's why I'm kinda plugging your YouTube channel. What I was doing there is showing that, she has a YouTube channel. So I'd like to do early plugs. I'm trying to find why, you know, charlotte smalley three five seven eight. We were saying 03/05/1978. We We're gonna go with that real big.
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Mhmm.
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How are you? Nice to, nice to see you. You you're a you you you're a well, first of all, you live in a a beautiful area called the Emerald Coast Of Florida. It's part Walton. For those who don't know, don't go there in the summer. It's too busy. It's it's absolutely gorgeous where you live, though. It's it's like you get a little winter still, but it's I mean, the water is the nicest water, at least in The US for sure. Arguably, parts of the world would hard to compete with it. Right.
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I swam with dolphins at my local beach park, my neighborhood, not the Gulf Of Mexico. I walked to my that's what I'm saying. I was feeling magical, and I'm walking to the park and I say, okay, universe, god. I say, I wanna see a dolphin. I want no one to be there. I wanna be able to do my flips in the water. No one will be at the beach. I get to flip around. I wanna see a dolphin. So and then I said I wanna see this killer butterfly, dragonflies and cute fun frisky squirrels on my way. I had the best experience. I saw all that, got down in the park. No. Nobody's there. I get in. I start doing my handstands, front flips, back flips. Well, not only did I see one dorsal fin, I saw two and then two more, and I realized they're not far from me. I was swimming with a pot of dolphins. Wow. And I had to you know how we're always looking for the next best thing, and I had to, like, slow down and go, Charlotte, bask in this moment. Yeah. You just swam with I I got chills right now. You just swam with a pot of doll and I didn't wanna be scared, and I wasn't scared. They would know it if you were. Yeah. They would. But when you're feeling fun and frisky, nature Yeah. Nature will react to you. It's great.
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You know, the good thing about having dolphins around when you're swimming in the ocean is that there's no sharks. No sharks. Because they they run away from them because dolphins will mess up a shark, like, it's fun. It's fun for them. They just go let's just go ram its skills. Let's keep doing it. It's gonna be great. Yeah. True story. I mean, it's it's dolphins around. You're a alright. So you're you're you're alluding a little to what you do with this manifestation stuff. Do you wanna start with what it is you do today? Give me, like, the ninety second pitch on that, and then back up into your story of how you got there. Okay.
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So I'm on Youtube and I'm on Instagram and I like to encourage and empower others. With what I've learned has totally changed my life. I was suffering from fibromyalgia and I found out we can heal our bodies and it's it's really in your mind and how you feel because how you feel is what you attract. So see when I was feeling fun and frisky, I was attracting the awesome, you know, nature nature experiences. Okay?
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And our thoughts do manifest all day. So but okay. So to do manifestation, which which you're saying is just a a general observation is clear. You're if you can think it, it will happen. Yes. Do you and in that moment And feel it. You have to feel it, but do you have to allow it yourself to see it and feel it? Like, meaning, like Oh. Do do you understand? Like, you could think, oh, it didn't happen, but was it there and you missed it, or or was it just not the right so is that what you mean by that, though? Your thoughts can will shape and manifest into reality around you is is the Like,
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here's an example. I totally transformed a relationship. I thought this person was against me, and I had all these negative thoughts. What I started saying is in my mind, oh, this person spoils me, loves me, and adores me. And guess what? I started attracting a different version. I think your eyes are open to it. Whatever you're focused on, you're seeing. Totally transform the relationship.
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Interesting. I probably could use it. Most relationships use a touch that I don't I probably could at times. Sometimes. Yeah.
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Because if you focus on what you don't like about that person, that's what you're gonna see.
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This is like when you're buying a new car, and you're like, oh, I'm looking at white, you know, Highlanders. All you see is white Highlanders on the road. I haven't seen myself in that. Particular activating
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r a s. Oh. So how did this,
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work with your I can't pronounce it.
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I was a nurse. I was a nurse, and I got really super I got sick with fibromyalgia, and nurses would pour out their heart and take care of everybody else but themselves. I never put myself first and I couldn't do enough. So I was feeling guilty, I was feeling stressed out and however you feel you attract more things like that. And I never took time for self care and I never prioritized myself and that's what we need to do. We need to be selfish and get happy every morning to have the best day of our life. So if there's one thing you do this whole new year, get get in the best feeling state in the morning when you get up. And in the morning, we're in theta state, and at the night at night, we're in theta state. That's a great time to speak your affirmations, positive affirmations, and you can literally have, be, or do anything.
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So on theta state, just to clarify for Yeah. I I know very little, but it's a it's where your brain is an activity level based coming out of sleeping. Right? So there's Yeah. Art you wanna you wanna just explain it just You're susceptible you're susceptible to new programming.
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You can pro reprogram your subconscious mind. And what think about your inner speed all day long. Be your own best encourager. Tell yourself, I'm so proud of you, Charlotte. You're doing great. Oh my gosh. Everything is always working out for me.
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Interesting. Yeah. Wait. Wait. So so a state of state, what is this exact time swagger master?
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As you're falling asleep, you can actually put yourself in a drowsy state, and then you can put on some, headphones that have a a looping affirmation. You can listen to a subliminal messaging. They've got it all on YouTube. I love it.
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It's great. This should be your channel right there. Just your own versions of this. So so you could put yourself in a theta state, but your body naturally does this. That's not Is there, like, a is there a tighter evolution of why that that that happens? Like, why in the mornings? Is it is it awareness, the threat? Like, what was the It's the sleepy state.
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It's the sleep So before you have coffee, effectively. Yeah. If time it takes you to go,
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bedroom to bathroom to figure out where a pot of coffee is, that's when you should maybe take a moment and do an affirmation.
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Well, before you get out of bed, this I suggest this. Before you get out of bed, find something in your life to appreciate, and it can be as small as a, just your pillow. Boy Okay. I love this pillow, and I get a state of appreciation before I even get out of bed. Because you don't wanna be in a day. What what is your alarm going off screw that up, or do you have to do a natural wake up state? Dude, I wake up all night long. I just don't get mad about it anymore.
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But but for the faintest day to work though, does it have to be a natural wake up or does your alarm ruin that or does does that matter?
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Well, no. I don't think your alarm would ruin it. I don't think feel like I'm gonna appreciate that that alarm went off. That's that's that's what I mean. I'm so happy that thing went right now and woke me up. And then know that you can do it any time of day that you can take a nap. You can do take a nap and do this. You can just lay down, calm your thoughts, lay down, deep breathe, and then you can put some positive affirmations on or they even have them where you can't hear them. You'll just hear, like, water or something, but they're embedded in it, and they work. Wow. I didn't hear that. It's fun. Check it out on YouTube. Oh my gosh.
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Just no. And and I think we're you know, some people, like, you know, they pray to higher powers. Oh, yeah. Prayer works. Prayer but sometimes things aren't answered right away. I would think affirmation, and it it's gotta be collected sometimes too. Repetitive.
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You have to be in a in a receiving state. You can't be worried about it's not there. You have to speak as if it's already done. Like, thank you for this, and then and speak it. Like so it took me less than four weeks by looping an affirmation that said, I'm so happy and grateful that I'm now a size five. Now I was at 50. I didn't do any exercises or anything.
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But you're you're age 50, not size fifty. Age 50. Okay. I was, like, size fifty to a five. I was probably, yeah, I was probably,
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12. I mean, at the least eight, but I went from an eight to a five at 50 years old. Oh, and all I did was speak it and feel it and stay in a good mood. I was grateful for all my food and like your water, your water carries memory. Your body is 80% water, so you can speak into your water. Oh, I'm so happy and grateful. You know?
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I'm I've never done that. I mean, people are gonna look at me sideways if I'm, like, at a restaurant, like, just talking to my water. Think it. But you can think it. That works too. A thought a thought If you don't wanna embarrass yourself, think it.
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But I mean get yourself hyped up. Like I love listening to high vibrational music in the morning because I'll go out, I tell you it'll be magical. I'll go to the grocery store, I'll feel like dancing. Everywhere I go I get to have a good time because my life is now. This is my dream life now. I'm not waiting for this to happen or that. I like affirmations and I'm ready for those to manifest, but today's the day. Today's the day of my success, my joy, my bliss.
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There's a there's a line in a song I love. The future is no place to place your better days. That's good.
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Very good.
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What is that from? Cry freedom. Anyway, I'd give him credit. K? He wrote it, not me. But the so so how do you teach this? Well, actually, let me back up a second. So you let's go on to get through your journey a little bit more. You're you're a nurse, so you have all the training, all the school, all the things that you need to go do, and all the expectations that go with that. And then you you you get But I had to unlearn. I had to walk back. You had to, like, accept that you're you were on a different path or maybe not the wrong path, but the path to where it took you and it was time to change. And and that's a Yes. Speaking of ties to cut, that's a a lot of people are never doing it. They're never gonna come over that. They're gonna be like, no. I did this. That that's a waste. I can't believe that. There's, like, faith involved in that. There's some kind of, like, trust. There is. And and I do. Because I I did. I retired without a plan. I just couldn't live the lie anymore and tell people, hey. You're sick. You need this pill.
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Pills do not work. And some pills have even worse side effects. And on my healing journey, I learned what really works, and we don't teach any of it. Nature time in nature, the sun, and mindset. You know about mindset. No one ever taught me about mindset, but you learn about every pill. And and
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it's it's run by So are are you saying that the nursing profession and and and it's a hard one. I mean, I mean, I'm not taking away from nurses. But, generally, the the push is describable.
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Yeah. Pills and tests.
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Well, that's that makes money. Sounds like a lot of Yeah. And nothing about mindset, nothing about
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practicing peace, inner inner stillness.
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Are they are nurses encouraged to not give hope?
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Yes.
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Seriously?
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Don't give false hope. Give them a pill. Tell them they're sick. Don't give any false hope. And that the wrong thing about that is if you focus on the oh, give them the worst case scenario. If if you do that and they focus on that, they can imagine that into existence. They can be so scared because fear is a powerful attractor. You will attract what you're afraid of.
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Well, it's like a black hole. Right? The Yes. But but so the the flip side of that though, I'm I'm one who tends to kinda follow the money. Right? Okay. If you if you if you manifest, if you're encouraged to give worst case scenarios, I assume the pill helps, and the tests help alleviate that fear. Yeah. Placebo effect.
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Right. Yeah. See, Joe Dispenza talks about that too. And I didn't know Joe Dispenza, and I've been compared to him, but I if you I don't know who Joe Dispenza is. You have to catch me up on that one. Okay. Who's that? Oh my gosh. He's a doctor. He cured his spinal cord. He refused surgery. He refused when he got an accident. His spinal cord was broke. He refused surgery. The doctors were mad. And he said he had this feeling that he goes, the source that created me can heal me. And he refused to have surgery. I've got chills. And he would lay there, and he would imagine his spinal cord reconnecting and being perfect. And he now he can walk.
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It's great. Wow. I don't know this I've looked this up, so Joe Dispenza. And so Joe Dispenza. The, Yes. He is. This is like so so what do the skeptics say? So so, you know, the if you count me, like, two years ago, I'd be like, whatever. I'm I'm coming around on there's a lot of stuff we don't know in the world. So help help me help
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Okay. This story that that helps overcome the skeptic listening. Okay. This this is okay. When you pray and you don't get it, you're upset, but you have to be in a receptive mode to receive it. In other words, you can't be doubting it. You can't be saying where is it. Just when it pops up in your mind, say thank you, God. It's done. And then you need to focus on something that brings you joy. The happier you feel, the better your vibrations. Like like, when you're in sky high joyful vibes, it's hard to have doubt. Right? It's hard to doubt yourself. When you're dancing and having a good old time, are you doubting anything? No? So you're not the only obstacle. I said, they're not that great. It it looks more like me hopping around out of beat.
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It's not I don't even feel that good about it. I'm just doing it because everyone else is moving. It would look I'd look like a psycho just standing there against the wall. So, anyway, be fair. Well, whatever. You're just not dancing. I do it's like, you know, I'll sit back here and just just wait. That's that's fine. Yeah. Well, I dance in my house. You know? It's not a dancer. But I get it because there's an energy involved with it. Right? And it's Moving. And it's fun, and I get it. And, I as I get older, I it's not the dancing I don't mind. It's it's the loud music.
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Yeah. Oh, I go to bed when the sun goes down now. What's that? I literally go to bed when the sun goes down. And I used to be I've worked night shift. I've worked days, minutes. Oh, I go to bed. I'm I'm asleep by 5PM, but I wake up at 3AM.
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I think I've I heard in the olden days, people would get up at, like, three, light a candle, read a book for a couple hours, go back to bed Yeah. And get up and the sun got up. I've heard this actually that this was like a very normal sleep state. You went to bed when the sun went down after, like, an hour or so after because you've done the day, you've eaten some food, and there was no real light. And so you just went to bed. And then you got up and lit a candle and read something to kinda get your day going and then went back to bed again. I I heard that, like, back in the settlers.
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That sounds right. That's what I've been doing naturally since I haven't worked since November 2023. Yeah. That's when I was like, I I've had enough. I'm gonna trust God and I'm gonna do my YouTube channel and I'm gonna do my Instagram and I'm gonna encourage others about how powerful we are. And our number one goal is to feel good. Thanks. Go for the next best feeling thought. Like, you can't feel like a victim if you're in a victim modality. You wanna get angry. You wanna get mad. That empowers you. Yeah. I'm not saying go take it out on anyone, but if you're feeling negative, sad, and depressed, and people are me over, get mad. Say, you know, I deserve a better life than this. Thank you, God, it's happening, and get grateful.
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Happens to you, not or happens for you, not to you. There you go. So tell me, so, you you, coached us. So and this is it's still a newer business. Right? So you're about two years in. Yeah. Twenty two, '20 '3, '20 '4. Not even that. Right? One of your half half years in. So, tell me about what's been the hardest part of your journey so far for you. So what's the tie you had to cut as as a business owner? Like, you know, to go from, like, a, you know, time for money job to, oh god, I gotta figure it out for myself job. What's been kind of the hardest for you to build this?
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I I feel like people don't believe me because it is kind of out there, but that that's where that's where society is headed. You know? Yes. Like, if you are so stuck on what you can see physically realize, but you're changing constantly. You know? So you have to have faith because you have to have faith. You every day decide you want something different. If you can do that despite what you see, but feel it. It's it's like you change on the inside and then your outer world changes. When I started loving myself and encouraging myself, all of a sudden, my outer world changed.
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What and you you you're there's some certainly truth to if you're a positive person, you'll tend to make people around you more positive. If you're negative, people will also, you know, glamour onto that as well. So it it it doesn't mean you have to go up and quit your job or anything like that. But if there's more positive towards yourself and towards the things you have, the fact that you have a pillow, you're in the top 1% of the world because there's a lot of people who don't even have a pillow. They don't have a bed. Like, there's if you have food on the table, like, you like, you you you it's about perspective. Right? Like, you're like, oh my god. I'm so sad because I have an old car. Like, most people don't even have a car. I know how to drive. Yeah. And and and I think I think that's what you're talking about. Right? To some degree. You can manifest in not even extreme. Let's say, like, we're carrying spinal cords. Right. But if you just wanna your mindset
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You can change your current job Yeah. By having a new grateful attitude for it. Because the more you're grateful your mind looks for things to be grateful for at your reticular activating system.
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So talk about how bad. So let let's get some practical tips. How Okay. What would be, like, a one, two, three, or four, five on how to become more grateful? You said I think one of them you said is every morning when you first wake up before you put a foot down Yeah. Take take a fraction of a second to be grateful for something. Yeah. That's one.
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And, you know, and and and you can also deep breathe. I okay. I've heard people say it's getting high on your own supply, but in the Bible, it says, God says I'm only a breath away. That's why breathing techniques are powerful. If you just slow deep breathe, relax, And then and then if you move around and you're having these great thoughts, you're gonna feel great. And, you know, be really selfish with how you feel. Don't let other people make you feel bad.
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Walk away. Step away from things. Or should you be grateful that they're they're trying to do that?
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Yeah. Find find something you like about them and that you can set up your day too by thinking about all the people you're gonna see today. Write down their name. Write down the best thing you like about them. So you're setting up your day. This is called prepaving your day. So put the per people's name like, I don't know, eight people you're gonna see that day. And then so write their name down. Think think of the best thing you like about them and write that down. That's all you're gonna see in that person. Let them know you like a journal? Keep a journal with you? Oh, journaling's great. Journaling is great to figure out what you really want in life. But, you know, you don't have to change jobs to actually change the job. You change your inner world. Be grateful for it.
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So I could see a lot of people, you know, it's funny. What you're describing is good life coaching, and you can help people with mindset. Probably how you're marketing it is what people go, woah. Woah. Woah. Woah. Woah. Woah. Yeah.
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So probably more. So I just found that that. I need help with that, and and I'm looking to get promoted.
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You know? That's right. That's why we're on a podcast. Wait. Wait. What you're describing often, by the way, is a, a very I look for these reflective moments that people listening and even their guests that they can take something from. So here one thing entrepreneurs do great is just give unsolicited advice, but here we go, is is that a lot of people have really good ideas and intent on what you're trying to do. And what you're trying to do is change someone's mindset, and you're trying to transform their lives, and you're calling it manifestation. And and that's what they need, and and and what they want is to be happier. And and and so sometimes what you'll happen sometimes in a business, right, or anything else is you have to give them what they want, sell them on that idea, and then deliver what they need. And and my point being is they may not know what the hell, you know, manifestation of thoughts and this other stuff is. They just know they wanna be happier, like, whatever it is throughout the day or just more you'll have to market to what they want, and then when you get in, say, hey. We're gonna do some breathing techniques, and we're gonna start thinking this way. And that is manifestation, but if you'd sold when you sell it that way, for like, that's too Woo woo. Are we gonna be doing acid later kind of stuff? Like, you know, like, you know, like, they they did they pull back. But they're like, I help you become happier, and here's how I did it. And it really helped me get over this, and they can relate to that. And and so this is a trap that a lot of people fall into is this you're so far ahead of everyone else for what you do that you have to come back to help someone take a hand and take them on that journey a little, because they're like, I do not know where she is right now, but she seems she's dancing in the the fruit section of Whole Foods right now. We don't know why. Like, I wanna be there, but I see what I'm saying? Like, you're you're you know? And I think this is a problem a lot of people have sometimes specific on life coaching type of things. So, oh, wait. Does that does that resonate at all that you're? Exactly.
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Exactly. But I give myself permission to feel good, and I wanna feel as good as I can feel because, damn it, this is my life.
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But frankly, you only get one of them. I as far as we know, I'm I'm not sure if you blackout or really go to a heavenly gate or not, but, like, you know, what whatever it is. I've learned all about that too, but I think we're in the matrix. I do believe if you look at any video game we've created, we are just we are just we're in a we're in a simulation. We're in like the Sims.
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Yeah. But you can break free from that when you realize you're the one doing all of it. You don't have to buy into anyone else's lie.
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You create your own reality. You you create your own Give me an example of what someone else's lie is that a lot of people buy into. What what do you mean by that?
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People are just so different. Okay. I think what it is okay. A lot of people are so concerned how others perceive them, and they can't act a certain way. Oh, I can't do that. That's not professional or whatever it is. They're they're think they they're taking other people's perception of them or how they think they perceive them instead of going what feels good. They don't give themselves permission to feel good. Oh, I need to act this way. You know?
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So one of the things you're saying, Lai, is, what you think others should see in you. You may feel like I feel like wearing flip flops and dancing in the supermarket aisle right now and not buying anything, and it's just how I am because I love the song where it's in my head. Anyway, I'm never gonna do that because if my neighbor saw me, they'll think I'm crazy. Right. But you'd feel happier if you did that. You're saying and I'm giving up, like, a very
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Yeah. I take baby steps toward it. Gotcha. You know? I've come a long way. Oh, yeah. I've come a long way, but I'm committed to this.
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Are there people in your life that have exited your life because of your transformation of where you've gone? Well well, I got out of nursing, so I've gotten rid of all my nursing friends.
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None of them none of them came with you and not for me at all? No. No. Was that surprising to you that not least one or two of them because that's kinda feels hurtful almost when, like, I worked with you. We were friends, but no? Well, this is how this is how I look at it. When people leave your life, it's so God can give you more. Like, your vibration is changing and you're gonna attract better people that resonate on the vibration you are now. Right? Has that happened for you? Well, I mean, I'm meeting people like you that's talking to me about promoting things, you know. Instead of working for a system, I'm creating my own life, and I'm trying to help others with theirs. I like that. That's good. You know, I'm ready to be on a stage and start talking about my book. I just haven't had the opportunity. Like, you know, about the Facebook being live on Facebook, I thought, okay. You know what? You're just gonna have to do it. I know everyone's afraid to do it. I said, just do the damn thing. That's that's another and I love it because Nike says just do it. Right. When I wrote that book, I had all this head chatter going on. Right? So
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Well, tell you about a little bit. So tell tell her when what what's the name of your book and what like, do I like shameless plugs. Let's throw one in there. What is what's your out book?
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I named it because I wanted to get the as much attention as I could for it. I wanted it to stand out. I named it manifest your ideal body size because I literally did that, but that was after I learned about healing. I got healed from fibromyalgia, and then I manifested my ideal body size by focusing on it. It was already done and in my mind, and I felt good every day. So when you feel good and when you eat, you have great metabolism. So it's not really what you're doing, but how you're feeling. And here's an example for that. There's people that drink to celebrate. Oh, I just won the lottery. Yeah. We're partying. Then there's other people. They feel negative going into drinking, and then it's horrible.
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It's an amplifier for your current mood for sure. Yes. It amplifies. And
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and, really, it's best not to, but don't beat yourself up over anything. Don't ever feel guilt. Forgive yourself.
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That's complete sociopathic behavior. I can do that. I don't feel guilty about anything. I mean, please don't kill anyone. Permission to be a
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Want the best brothers. And love everybody. Just walk away from the one you can't stand.
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I think you're on to something with that idea of, you know, man and I think from a marketing standpoint, right, of, you know, man you know, imagine your own what your ideal body is. You have to stick with that vision. Yes. But there's stuff you actually need to do. So if you're like, I wanna be from a eight to a five, you will probably have to put down eating, you know, sugar all day long or
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or not. I did eat sugar, but this is the thing. I was so happy and grateful. When you when you use that information over all day long in your mind, I'm happy and grateful that,
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you don't look for things to fulfill you. You don't Well, so you probably eat less of it because you're happy for the one you had as opposed to the 15 you just shove in your face. Right? So Yeah. Like, but I think they're like, I think and maybe that's not the case for for what you did, but I think that that that's it, though. You still have to you have to do things that still are aligned to the mindset and not just Yeah. Hope it happens. Like, you still have to be aware and be willing. What It's, you know, it's the funny it's the funny story of, like, the guy that's, like, floating in the ocean, and he's once the boat comes by, he's like, no. Jesus or god's gonna save me. And then, then, like, another person goes by and he dies. He's like, what? I thought you were gonna see me. He's like, I sent a boat. I sent a plane. I sent Yes. My word. Okay. I think what else do you need? I do have an answer to that.
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Take inspired action. In other words, you're not forcing it. You you're sitting with yourself and you're getting to know yourself. Right? And you're wanting this manifestation, but you don't get up and push and enforce something, what you do, when you feel inspired, when something sounds like a really fun idea, you go do it.
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A say yes mentality.
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Yeah. But if it feels good, you in other words, so it's your it's your whole intention. Your intention is powerful. I intend to have the funnest day. I mean, joy is the success we seek. Right? Now if you're working too many hours and stressed out and you're getting a ulcer because of it, that's no fun.
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Or you just take a pill.
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Just kidding. See what I did there? Which is bad. Yep. Which is bad if you don't deal with your heart issues. Like, you know how someone leaves you, you're traumatic about that, and now you don't trust women or now you don't trust friends. Okay? You gotta deal with these heart issues and, like, can't have, like, self hatred. This all comes from love, joy, and peace. You know? And when you follow your excitement, like, wow, that sounds like that sounds like fun today. I'm gonna go do that. And that could be, for me, a trip to the grocery store. And I go and I meet somebody really cool, and we have a great conversation, and then I come back home, and I'm like, that was really great.
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I love it. When you're and and have you have you have you gotten through and coached a few people through this so far? Just say that way, ask first. Literally only two. Two? Well, it's two. So there's two. So one of the questions that you should ask is why did they pick you? And and how did that go? How how was that coaching's what did you personally learn from coaching somebody? Because the first time you coach somebody, it's you're like, oh, you have this imposter syndrome. I'm not sure what I'm doing. Right. How did that go for you, and how did it how did it end up for them? You know, it's funny. It literally takes, like, a thirty minute conversation. I explained
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some principles, you know, and they're surprised that it's that easy. They want it to be harder. Oh, it can't be that easy. No. Can't be that easy. Well, controlling our thoughts can be an issue. So, yeah, it's not that easy. But when you have no thoughts against it, when you have more thoughts for it than against it, you manifest it.
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I like it. What did you and and who's the ideal kind of customer for you? Like, who who can you help, like, right now? What what's going on in their head or what's going on in their life?
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A stressed out mom, you know, because I because I know how that was. You want and and me being a nurse, you wanna do everything for everybody. But we gotta take care of ourselves first because the better we feel, the better we can take care of others. But we're not we're not doing anyone a service if we're sitting there hating on ourself or stressed out. You know, a lot of people stress eat and that doesn't work. That piles on more guilt. Okay?
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That's a nasty that's a nasty side. People say, you know, I think I'd rather have the I starve myself when I'm stressed. Right. And I used to starve myself.
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As a teenager, I would try and I'd work out three times a day. Then I I would aerobics. I'm talking when Jane Fonda had a record. Okay? I so I used to that. Now I manifested it. It's like I felt so good and happy. I didn't need to eat to feel good. I was already feeling happy.
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You know? Yeah. No. I I I I think I think the people you help, right, are someone who's, Oh, yeah. Help me. Feel lost. Right? They're they're in the spot of would that be a fair description to someone who feel like there's something missing?
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They feel something missing. Yeah.
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And you can help them, channel it. And I I feel like for this to work. Right? It's the small things starting with, like, what you described some, like, keep a little journal, start with a thought, get your coffee, write down a few things, like, just make it practical, go have your day, and see how was it better for those little two, three, four things. And then you start stacking in new things with it, I assume. Something like it has to be something that's built, because it it has to become a habit. Because habits become who you are, right, at some point. Right? Like and and so, I would be a skeptical. Now I what what I would have a tough time I I always ask the business kind of questions, and these two is kinda part of the is a is what would I pay for that? And I and I don't know because I'm just not, you know for me, I'm not a client. I wouldn't be I'm not that spot where I I feel like a desperate need to have that, but, is it like, I guess the thing is Any major
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any major change you want, what is first of all, what is it worth to you to have it?
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Oh, I don't just you just agree with that. But, like, when you have a coach, how long do I need a coach to do this? This is kind of what I was going to. Like, how how long would they do they hire you for or should they? Well, okay. It literally can be just a thirty minute conversation because I so I share
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I share the, like, principles, you know, and how important it is to feel and our mindset. But I'm always available if you if someone needs a refresher and plus you could you can watch my channels because I'm always sharing on the on the channels, you know, because I do you know I even watch my own YouTube channel? And then I remember something that I used to really know, and I go, wow.
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I needed that. Like, my own channel inspires me. Yep. And the building Billy, for those out there thinking about building a YouTube channel, it is a lot of work. Just you know it. You probably didn't you probably didn't realize it when you got into it, how hard it's it is. And I tell people this, when you get into YouTube or anything else, it's not like a planet. It's not like a solar system. It's not even a galaxy. It's like its own universe of things you gotta know how to go do. And not to over complicate or scare some away from, but just realize there's a lot going on Yeah. To make it work well. And and but but you're doing the basics, which is showing up. You're putting it out there. You're staying on brand of what you do. And if as long as you keep doing that and you stay positive, you stay where you are, I I believe you you would get your slice of YouTube or whatever that is. Like, is it gonna be mister beast big? No. Because it's not what that there's not that many people looking for that. But if, you know, the 8% of the YouTube that's looking for business related things, how to get better, and they find yours, and you get a few thousand subscribers, you're killing it. You're you're doing it really well. And so keep it up. Because it's hard. I appreciate what you're doing there because it's I do know that it's very difficult. And do it because you love it. Well, that's the thing. So I I I tell people, I'll get asked that question of, like, well, if I wanna be an entrepreneur, what would I do? That's, like, usually the one thing people, like, that that holds them from doing something. Like, oh, what would I I don't know what I would do. And I'd love your this is my take. I'd love to hear yours, which is there there's a Venn diagram, which is where circles overlap for those who don't know. But, there's passion. You have a passion for something. You have a circle that is you could you're good at it or could be really good at it or you'll train to be good at it. And then there's something that people pay money for. In the middle of that is where you should focus your time and energy from a career standpoint. What is your take on that? And where does what you help people with, where how does it overlay to kind of finding you still gotta make money in life. Like, you gotta, you know, you gotta produce. But
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I totally agree with that. And I know that weight loss for women, oh my gosh, we're always looking for the next product.
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We are. But is a product the right answer? Is it is it more of a thinking method?
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It's a thinking method. Yeah. But they don't know that. They're getting sold. They're getting sold on that commercial because the commercial shows you that you need something, and then we've got the answer to it.
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Do you think at some point, though, technology can just salt like, there's this Ozambique stuff and then this other stuff. There's no side effects, but but is at some point can someone just go get a shot and it's takes care of that?
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I just if you don't if you don't change your mindset about it, I don't think so. Because if if that drug isn't available, you're gonna blow up again.
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I think even if it is available, it just creates another set of problems, but it I don't know. Or side effects. Because
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where that drug is made, they won't sell it. Where Where's the main? Sweden. I think it's Sweden. They won't sell it in Sweden, and they they upcharge it so big to come to America. Yeah. You know, RFK is really into that.
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You know anything about RFK? I don't know. I I I don't watch news or politics because it's just upsetting. It takes you to a negative place. Oh, I can't watch too much of that either.
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But I'm excited about where we're headed because he knows a lot. He I don't know how old he is, but he is so muscular and fit. No body fat. He's been doing pull ups, all this. And the person that was in there was, like, a three hundred pound transvestite
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man. Transvestite irrelevant? The three hundred pounds? Less than a hundred pounds. RFK. You said RFK is gonna be good for this position? Yes. Because he's gonna he's gonna,
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put limits. Okay. First of all, like, we should we shouldn't, like, new the news should never be sponsored by medicine because the the reporters don't wanna speak out against their sponsor. Think about that conflict of interest.
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And there's some There there's a there's some serious truth to that when we and and I I don't mean to interrupt you, but I think this sets a very relevant piece when you look at, like, COVID and the things. The number one sponsor of, like, CNN Headline News and other is, like, Pfizer. Right? Like or Yes. Name your news network. And they're produced and and then the other channels are the other ones. And they're the ones producing billions for the things they're and and it's like, if you wanna know what the latest pills are, just go watch weekend news. And, like, 35, 40 percent of it is just ads, and it's all pharma. And it's it's it's why I don't watch. It's one of the reasons we don't even watch TV anymore. It's so many ads. It's just, like, it's so brutal. But, yes, you're right. There's no there's hard to trust anything on there when the the people that are paying for it are,
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Sponsoring.
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Yeah. It's just like, anyway. Conflict of interest. Yeah. Well, it is. It well, if it's not conflict of interest, at least it it it diminishes the integrity of it of whatever it is you're watching. So
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That's true.
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But I believe what you're doing. However you market and label it, and we can probably take that off topic a little bit too, but is having a good mindset and whatever you call it Yeah. Yeah. Only will benefit you
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Exactly.
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In some way or another. Even if it's just fractional. Even just happy for thirty more seconds in the day. You're it will only benefit you, and it will certainly benefit those around you. And and that should snowball effect if you can keep the the, the negative black holes away from yourself. I I that's my take on it. And it's hard to it's hard to do sometimes, but, I mean, that's effectively what you're doing for people is you're helping them snowball happy, and better.
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Yeah. And and for women, I think we like to we like to please those we're around, and we focus more on their pleasure or or making them happy than ourselves happy. But the happier we are to start the day, the easier it is for everybody.
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Yeah. Do you have a do you have a look of your what's your book look like? Do you have a do you have a there to show it by chance?
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Oh goodness. I didn't have it ready.
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That's okay. You know, if you had it, you can show it up. I was at least, you know, so people can get an image of it. It's
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on okay. It's a beach scene because I live Gulf Coast and I took a beautiful beach scene picture. And so it's pink blue,
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teal and white sand. Yeah. Give give me what's the name of it again? Sorry. I was I'll put it manifest
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your ideal body size.
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It's on Amazon. What if my ideal body size is a plus a hundred pounds? Oh, wait. Hold on. Okay. And it's on Amazon. I'm using chat g p t for search, and it's it's screwing up my ability to do this. Alright. I'm gonna have to find another way to do this. Alright. Matt, if that we'll put a link in the end description for you. If there was a question I should have asked you today, but I didn't, what would that question have been?
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The question would be, people need to really search themselves and ask themselves, what do I really want? Because I literally can have be or do anything. Like, it it seems like sometimes we just do a role because it's working for us or something like that. Like, it's easier to please other people. Get to know yourself. Get to know what brings you joy and ask yourself, what do I really want? Because you can literally have beer do anything. It starts with small steps, but you will become what you think about. Right.
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Your your, where your attention goes, so does the light. Right? So, that's true. This week, you know, we we do the whole, church thing. Right? But, you know, I like where we go because it's not so religiously, it's more practical things. But one of the the big question they asked for the year was, what was I made for? And it's a really good question of, I don't know. I I I I can I even answer that to myself? Was it was it a is it a long one I'm doing now? Is it making people laugh? Is it I don't know. You know, and and it's like, is it a combination of being this and that? And it's a really solid question of, I don't know the answer to that. And I think we were describing for time is oh, you do. Can you can you share that, please? I think I'm gonna share with you.
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Look at this time of, like destruction and rebuilding we're going through. Right? Big changes in the world going on. You're here to make people happy. Right? So you're here, you being on the planet at this time in a high vibrational state, you are healing the planet.
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Me?
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Yes. Just you just you following your bliss. Me. Just deciding to be in a good mood. We're healing the planet. Our light is activating others' lights.
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You know? I have to dive into that one. I'm not sure I was put on this planet to heal it. I'm not sure. I feel like humans are parasites, by the way. We come from another planet. Oh. And we're physical form. We're all filled with God. Satere's filled with God. We're God in physical form. We have to explain the dinosaurs to me exactly where they fit into this story. I know. I don't get that. I don't either. So because they came from another planet, and then a meteor hit, and our DNA was on that, like, little bacterias, and then now we're here, and they're not. And I think something else will hit us. I actually think we came from Mars. I think that's probably where we came from. And Elon's taken us back. You know what? Elon. Thank you, Elon. On that note, I'd like to thank you for coming on today. It's been great. Alright. Once again, shameless plug. Go to instagram.com, charlotte life coach. I'll say it simply just as a marketer. If you if you're kinda feeling lost and you wanna find a way to think better, feel better just in wherever state you're in, it's through baby steps, it's through some very profound prescribed things you could do for yourself that are just start small and build upon it. That's what you help people do. Yes? Yes. Perfect. Awesome. Instagram.com/charlottelifecoach. You are on YouTube at at Charlotte's, Charlotte's
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web. No. Charlotte Smart. I love that. I love that. 3578.
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I think the Instagram one's easier to use, but you guys either way, go do it. Check her out. I subscribed. So if I subscribe, you have to subscribe. It's gonna be great. Thank you, everybody. Thank you. Hey. Listen. I'm gonna get you LinkedIn? Why am I on LinkedIn? Just Charlotte Smalley, I think? I don't know. I'll have to look that one up. I didn't have that one preformed. For this, I would type in marketing standpoint, I would use Instagram. I would use Meta. This is definitely not LinkedIn type of stuff. This is definitely more Meta. Okay. Thank you. But I hang out. I'm gonna put you in the, I'm gonna put you in the, periwinkle room. I'll be right back with you. Thank you so much for calling today, Charlotte. Listen. For everyone who made it this part in the podcast, thank you for listening. Charlotte is on a journey of herself, for herself and, and and trying to bring others along. You know, as she figures it out, she's helping others figure it out too, and it's very powerful. I mean, I had it's a little conversation with her off camera and, you know, I would find thirty minutes with her. Just if you're in that state where you could maybe use a little direction or a little change or you're considering where you are in your life. And and and honestly, this kind of hits in your forties and fifties. Reach out to her, see what she can do for you, see if she can at least get you in a direction. She said in thirty minutes, maybe it's enough just to get you set up and maybe you you work with her, maybe you don't, but she did offer that, so go to her. I'll get up at instagram.com/charlottelifecoach. Thank you for listening by the way. Get out there until we meet again and go unleash your entrepreneur. Thanks for listening to the Never Been Promoted podcast. Hey. Before you go, hit that follow button on your favorite podcast player, Apple, Spotify. Crush that little follow button so you get the latest episodes as they come out. Thank you so much for listening to the Never Been Promoted podcast.